Chair: David Lammy MP

Vice-Chairmen: Charles Walker MP, John Hemming MP, Jon Cruddas MP

Secretary: Annette Brooke MP Treasurer: Andrew Selous MP

The Fathers Journey: a survey of help-seeking behaviour by

separating and recently separated fathers
Ross Jones, Adrienne Burgess & Vahsti Hale
28 April 2012
The findings presented in this paper were gathered via an on-line survey designed to
capture fathers experiences across the transition to separation with a focus on helpseeking behaviour. The aim was to identify the formal services these men were
already approaching, with a view to suggesting how information and support might
be delivered via these or other touch points. Other research has identified few
services for separating and separated fathers1 and it seems likely that when this
population is not well supported or advised this will impact negatively on the
financial and other support they can provide to their children and their childrens
mothers.
Carried out between 15th April and 15th May in 2011, the survey was divided into two
sections, asking fathers first about their search for professional support for a range
of issues in the year leading up to separation and then in the year afterwards. To
have included detailed questioning on informal support would have made the
questionnaire too long. However, that important topic also needs to be
investigated.
The sample consisted of 295 respondents directed to the survey through the
Families Need Fathers and Fatherhood Institute websites. The survey was also
advertised in the electronic-newsletters of both organisations and the FNF forum.
The respondents who came to the survey via Families Need Fathers are likely to have
experienced more highly conflicted separations than the average. This may not be
the case for those who approached via the Fatherhood Institute website, since that
1

Further limitations of the survey include the fact that information was sought from only one
family member (the father) and for most of the respondents is likely to have been gathered
retrospectively.

organisation does not specialise in families facing separation. However, overall,

individuals experiencing particularly difficult separations may be more likely than the
average to have completed the survey.
While, for the reasons above, the survey cannot claim to be statistically
representative of the general population of separated/separating fathers, the
information gained can provide pointers to areas to focus on to improve and
enhance service provision for these men.
We now turn to the issues addressed in the survey. Were they relevant to this
population of separating/separated fathers? How many sought support for them?
And where did they look?

Section 1: Factors Concerning Adults

The couple relationship: problems experienced and advice sought
Respondents were asked about difficulties in their relationship with their childs
mother: 89.2% reported that they had sensed difficulties before they separated, and
of this group, 62.3% said they had sensed difficulties for more than a year prior.

Figure 1: How long before you separated did you sense that there were difficulties
in your relationship? (of those who had sensed difficulties prior to separation)
More than 12 months
Betw een 9 and 12 months
Betw een 6 and 9 months
Betw een 3 and 6 months
Betw een 1 and 3 months
Les s than one month
0.00%

10.00%

20.00%

30.00%

40.00%

50.00%

60.00%

70.00%

Pe r ce n tag e o f r e s p o n d e n ts

239 recorded responses, 56 missing responses

Of those who had sensed difficulties prior to separation, 62.6% said that they had
not sought professional advice/guidance/support for relationship issues; and just
over one third (37.4%) had done so. Of these, in the year prior to separation, 48.1%
had consulted RELATE, 39.5% their doctor and 30.9% a mediation service. Solicitors
had been consulted by 29.6%.; and both Citizens Advice and Families Need Fathers
by 16.0%. Help had also been sought from their childrens school (12.3%). Only

4.9% had spoken to their local Childrens Centre; and fewer than 2% had gone to
Family Lives or Gingerbread.
In the post separation year, help-seeking for relationship problems was substantially
greater, with 59.2% of the sample looking for professional help. Of these, 63.2%
approached their solicitor and 48% their doctor. Other agencies addressed included
Families Need Fathers (48.8%), a mediation service (43.2%), Relate (28.8%) and
Citizens Advice (20.8%). Again, perhaps surprisingly, schools figured with16.8% of
the 59.2% of fathers who had sought help for relationship problems looking to their
childs school for this. It is likely that some individuals sought support from a
number of agencies. Today, use of mediation services is likely to be greater given
that in many cases mediation is now mandatory before application to a court.
Employment: problems experienced and advice sought
The employment behaviour of separated/separating fathers should be of substantial
interest to government and employers. In the year prior to separation 40.5% of our
sample reported that they changed their working patterns. This percentage
increased in the year following separation, with 52.5% reporting that they changed
their working patterns. Comparison with non-separating fathers of the same age
and circumstances would be ideal, though is not available. However, we suspect
that these rates are very high.
The nature of these changes is of particular interest (Figure 2 and Table 1). In the
year prior to separation 30% of men who changed their working patterns said they
had increased their working hours while in the year after separation only 11.4%
reported an increase.
By contrast, in the year following separation 16.7% of respondents who had changed
work patterns reduced their working hours whereas only 11.7% had done so in the
year prior. One cannot determine from this simple survey whether the substantial
increase in working hours prior to separation was in response to family tensions or a
contributing factor to them (though we may expect the relationship to be reciprocal
in many instances).
Nor can we know the reasons for the marked reduction in working hours after
separation, which may be indicative of factors such as stress or increased pressure
placed upon a fathers time as he tries to balance work commitments with parenting
arrangements post-separation.2

A worsening economic climate is not likely to be a factor as not all the respondents were
separating during the same years

Figure 2: Types of changes made by those who changed their work patterns
(respondents were invited to select as many as applied)
Changed position w ithin the same company
Moved to a different employer
Became self employed
Year prior to separation (%)

Took paid/ unpaid leave

Year follow ing separation (%)

Was signed off w ork due to illness

Became unemployed
Reduced w orking hours
Increased w orking hours
Other

0.00% 5.00% 10.00% 15.00% 20.00% 25.00% 30.00% 35.00% 40.00% 45.00% 50.00%
Percentage of respondents

Table 1: Changes in employment prior to and following separation

Year prior to separation
Year following separation
(%)
(%)
Changed position within
24.4
18.4
the same company
Moved to a different
45.6
34.2
employer
Became self employed
13.3
10.5
Took paid/ unpaid leave
11.1
11.4
Was signed off work due to
11.1
19.3
illness
Became unemployed
18.9
32.5
Reduced working hours
11.1
16.7
Increased working hours
Other

30
32.2

11.4
16.7

Year prior to separation: 90 recorded responses, 205 missing responses

Year following separation: 114 recorded responses, 181 missing responses
Fathers who had changed their working patterns were less likely to move to a
position in the same company in the post-separation year than in the pre-separation
year: down from 24.4% pre-separation to 18.4% post-separation. They were also less
likely to move to a different employer (45.6% in the year prior to separation
compared with 34.2% in the year afterwards). Future research could usefully
compare such work-pattern changes with those of non-separating fathers in the
same age cohorts.

There was a strong correlation between separation and mens absence from work
through illness: 19.3% of the 52.5% of men who changed their working patterns
after separation (8.2% of the whole sample) report being signed off work due to
illness during that year. This figure was double that found in the year prior to
separation, when 11.1% of the 40.5% who changed their working patterns (4.1% of
the whole) were signed off from work due to illness.
Furthermore, 32.5% of the 52.5% of men who changed their working patterns in the
year after separation (13.9% of the respondents to this question) became
unemployed during this period. Again this was considerably higher than before
separation, when 7% of the respondents (18.9% of the 40.5% of fathers who
reported changing their working patterns) became unemployed.
These figures are extraordinarily high: what they amount to is 11% of the fathers
who responded to the employment questions (and most did so) becoming
unemployed or being signed off for illness in the pre-separation year and 22.1% in
the year post3. These figures represent enormous costs to the State and to
employers. For employers costs are compounded by the movement of substantial
numbers of fathers to different employers over these two time periods: almost half
of the 40.5% of fathers who changed work patterns in the year prior to separation
moved to a different employer, as did just over a third of the 52.5% of fathers who
changed work patterns in the year after separation.
Given the high numbers of the men who did not seek employment advice during
those two years (70.6% of respondents in the year pre-separation and 59% in the
year post-separation) it seems that many who find themselves facing employment
crises are unlikely to be receiving the information and support they need to maintain
themselves in employment and continue to support their children financially. This
is compounded by the finding that just 5.2% of respondents to the who did you seek
guidance about employment issues from question in the year prior to separation
and 10.8% of respondents to this question in the year following separation sought
such advice from anyone outside of their immediate social/professional circle (Table
2). Fathers both prior to and following separation were far more likely to turn to
family or friends4 than to professionals for support with employment: 34.6% of
respondents in the year prior to separation and 41.5% of respondents in the year
following separation. This may not be a productive strategy, particularly where social
capital is low.

Some of these may be the same men - signed off for illness AND becoming unemployed in the same
year.
4
This was the only question in our survey which asked about informal advice/support seeking. The fact
that support was sought far more often from informal than formal sources suggests that this pattern
may also prevail in other areas in which the fathers sought support

Table 2: Sources of Employment Support used by Fathers (respondents were

invited to select as many as applied)
Year prior to separation
(%)
70.6

Year following
separation (%)
59

I did not seek (employment)

advice from anyone
Family
16.9
20.3
Friend
17.7
21.2
Colleague
8.9
11.3
Manager/Employer
10.9
19.4
Employment/Training service
5.2
10.8
(eg. recruitment agency, Job
Centre Plus, Connexions)
Other
4.8
3.2
Year prior to separation: 248 recorded responses, 47 missing responses
Year following separation: 222 recorded responses, 73 missing responses

These results suggest that there is considerable scope for separating and recently
separated fathers to be more adequately supported with employment. Whether
these fathers were unaware of the professional support available to them, unhappy
with its quality or simply unwilling to use it remain open questions. The high
proportion of those who slip into unemployment, change employers and are signed
off sick during and immediately after separation suggests that it could be in
employers interests to look at innovative ways of providing support to these men,
so they optimise their performance and retain them.
Additionally, as family and friends are the first port of call for many, better equipping
these informal sources of support to understand the effects of
separation/relationship distress on work performance, offer appropriate support or
signpost to relevant services may enable more separating men to receive help with
employment earlier. Positive spinoffs in terms of their own wellbeing as well as their
ability to continue to support their children are likely to be substantial.

Mental Health: problems experienced and advice sought

The fathers in the survey were asked about their mental health and perceived
changes in their mental health over the period of separation (see Table 3). Mental
health problems are, again, costly to the State and to employers not to mention to
families and to men themselves.

Table 3: How would you describe your mental health compared to how it had been
previously?
Year prior to separation (%)
Year following separation (%)
Much better
5.0
9.5
A little better
5.8
8.7
About the same
35.5
20.3
A little worse
30.9
33.8
Much worse
22.8
27.7
Year prior to separation: 259 recorded responses, 36 missing responses
Year following separation: 231 recorded responses, 64 missing responses
Throughout the year before and the year after separation, over half our respondents
reported deterioration in their mental health: 53.7% said their mental health had
got a little or much worse in the pre-separation year with 61.5% reporting worse
mental health in the post-separation year. Not all, however, looked for help with
this issue: 24.2% consulted healthcare professionals more often than usual in the
year prior to separation and 47.9% did so in the year post, with GPs being the main
health professionals (Among those visiting a health care professional, only 27.5%
mentioned relationship difficulties to them in the year prior to separation.
Correlations are likely between mental health difficulties and the slide into
unemployment, alcohol/substance misuse and being signed off for sickness.
Alcohol/ substance misuse: problems experienced and advice/support sought
In the wider literature, strong correlations are found, particularly among men,
between mental health difficulties/trauma and substance misuse (Velleman, 2004;
Ballard, 1994). Alcohol or other substance misuse by the men themselves or their
partner was cited as a problem by 22.7% of survey respondents in the year preseparation and 22.2% in the year post separation (figure 3).
Figure 3: Did you or your partner experience problems with alcohol/substance
abuse?
90.00%
80.00%
70.00%
60.00%
50.00%
40.00%

Yes

No

30.00%
20.00%
10.00%
0.00%
In the year before separation

In the year after separation

Year before separation: 242 recorded responses, 53 missing responses

7

Year after separation: 225 recorded responses, 70 missing responses

In the pre-separation year, 7% of the respondents said that they personally had an
alcohol/substance problem; this rose only slightly to 8.1% post-separation. Female
partners alcohol/substance misuse was seen as slightly more problematic. In our
study, 10.7% of respondents said their partner had an alcohol/drug problem preseparation, dropping slightly to 9.8% post-separation. Clearly, it is easier to see a
problem in ones partner than in oneself. Pre-separation, 4.9% of the respondents
said that alcohol/other substance abuse was a problem for both themselves and
their partner, with 4.2% identifying this as an issue for the year after separation. It is
possible that more of our sample were using alcohol/drugs in milder but still
destructive ways than was gathered by the wording of our question, which asked
respondents to identify when such use was problematic.
Among the group who reported that they or their partner had alcohol/substance
misuse problems, 43.5% of those who had experienced this in the pre-separation
year and 41.3% of those who had experienced it in the post-separation year did not
seek advice or support for this issue from any professional.
Where advice/support was sought, this was most likely to be from a health
professional. Of the group who stated that in the year before separation they or
their partner had an alcohol/substance misuse problem, 39.1% spoke with a doctor
about this. In the year after separation, the percentage speaking to a doctor about
this topic was slightly lower: 32.6%. To what extent the health professionals made
the link between the substance misuse and the mens family circumstances is not
known; nor do we know when or whether referral or support was provided for
drug/alcohol use or associated issues (such as mental health problems, debt or
couple relationship/child contact/child behaviour difficulties). Only 27.5% of those
who visited a healthcare practitioner said they had revealed their family
circumstances.
It seems likely to us that if separating/separated fathers approach professionals for
one problem, this will be addressed more effectively if those professionals enquire
about wider issues and provide support or referrals when other difficulties are
identified. In fact, help-seeking for one problem whether it be related to
themselves, their children or their childrens mothers - can be seen as an
opportunity to identify and address other challenges the fathers may be facing.
Making the most of such opportunities with separating/separated fathers may be
particularly important, given that fathers are far less likely than mothers to be in
close contact with other services. Future research could identify the extent to which
such holistic support is offered to separating/separated fathers, and whether the
support provided to single mothers is more or less holistic or about the same.

Section 2: Factors concerning children

Father-child relationship quality
Respondents were asked about the quality of their relationship with their children
(see Table 4). Other research has indicated that the quality of the father-child
relationship may deteriorate before separation, including where men use emotional
withdrawal from their partner as a coping mechanism and, in the process, also
withdraw from their children (Sturge-Apple et al, 2006). In the year prior to
separation, 18.5% of our respondents said that the quality of their relationship with
their children was weaker than it had been previously. This percentage rose to
almost half (49.3%) of our respondents in the year following separation. Since most
fathers and their children are not likely to be living together at this time point, this
comes as no surprise.
It is also interesting that 29.1% of fathers perceived improved relationships with
their children in the year before separation and 35% reported this afterwards. Since
stress is known negatively to affect most family relationships, particularly fatherchild relationships (Lamb & Lewis, 2004), this finding is counter-intuitive. On this
issue it would have been valuable to have childrens perceptions and to have been
able to gather the data in real time. However, what is plain (and is borne out from
other research) is that father-child relationships do not necessarily falter across the
transition and some may improve. While separation is strongly correlated with
poorer father-child (and mother-child) relationships, the phenomenon of divorceactivated fatherhood has also been noted, where some separated fathers become
more involved with their children and more satisfied with that relationship (Bray &
Kelly, 1999).
Table 4: How would you describe the quality of your relationship with your child
compared to how it had been before?
Year prior to separation
Year following separation
(%)
(%)
Much stronger
16.0
17.5
A little stronger
13.1
17.5
About the same
52.3
17.5
A little weaker
10.1
19.3
Much weaker
8.4
30.0
Year prior to separation: 237 recorded responses, 58 missing responses
Year following separation: 223 recorded responses, 72 missing responses
Parenting arrangements, child behaviour and child maintenance: problems
experienced and advice/support sought
For all these issues, help-seeking was substantially higher in the year following
separation, particularly around residence/contact issues, although help in relation to
their children was also sought by some men prior to separation (Table 5). Such
touch points may provide opportunities for professionals to assist separating
9

fathers to acknowledge and address other pertinent issues which are affecting their
functioning, but for which they are not seeking help.
Table 5: Percentage of fathers who answered yes they did speak to charities or
other professionals regarding areas listed below:
Year prior to separation
Year following separation
(%)
(%)
Residence/seeing children
17.6
70.7
Child Maintenance
14.5
57.0
Tax/ benefits
3.2
17.6
Finance/ debts
15.3
32.0
Childs behaviour
13.2
33.3
School Performance
20.4
38.2

Contact/Residence
In the year following separation, help seeking in relation to residence/contact was
high.
Figure 4: Did you speak to any professionals or charities regarding residence/
seeing your children?
90.00%
80.00%
70.00%
60.00%
50.00%

Yes

40.00%

No

30.00%
20.00%
10.00%
0.00%
Year prior to separation

Year follow ing separation

Year prior to separation: 256 responses, 39 missing responses

Year following separation: 232 responses, 63 missing responses
Among the fathers who sought professional advice for contact/residence issues,
most turned to the legal profession, with 79.1% of those who sought such advice
approaching solicitors in the year before separation and 88.1% approaching them in
the year afterwards (Table 6).

10

Just over a fifth of respondents approached Citizens Advice for advice about
contact/residence (20.9% in the year before separation and 20.1% in the year after
separation). In the pre-separation year, 23.3% reported that they had sought such
advice from Relate, falling to 8.2% in the year after separation.
Child maintenance
Advice sought regarding child maintenance also saw a large increase from the year
before separation (14.5% of the respondents) to the year afterwards (57%). Of the
35 fathers who sought pre-separation advice on child maintenance, two thirds
sought this from a solicitor, as did 81.0% of those seeking such advice in the post
separation year. Citizens Advice was also used quite frequently: 25.7% used this
service to find out about child maintenance in the pre-separation year; 14.7% in the
year after separation.
Finance/debt
In the pre-separation year 15.3% of fathers said that they spoke to professional
services regarding debt or finance. This figure rose, as might be expected, in the year
post-separation to 32% of respondents. Other research has shown financial
problems to be strongly correlated with separation, both as a stimulus for it and
resulting from it. It is therefore interesting to note that such a small minority of
fathers, particularly in the pre-separation year, sought advice on this topic. Citizens
Advice was the professional service most commonly consulted, with 33.3% of those
who sought such support approaching this agency in the year pre-separation and
50% in the year post-separation.
Those who chose other in relation to sources of support on debt/finance issues
identified a range of services including help-lines and online support services. In the
year before separation, 12% of those who talked with professionals about these
matters said that they spoke to their bank. In the year following separation, this
increased to 16.7% of the 32% of fathers who sought support for financial matters,
meaning that 3.4% of the total sample of fathers approached their bank in the postseparation year. Banks have not previously been identified as potential providers of
information/support to separating families or fathers.
School performance
Of the 38.2% of the respondents who said that they had consulted professional
services regarding their childs school performance in the year after separation,
nearly all (97.5%) said they had spoken to their childs school. The percentage was
also very high in the year before separation where of the 20.4% fathers who had
consulted professional organisations regarding their childs school performance,
89.8% had spoken with the school making schools important touch-points for
around 1:5 fathers before separation and more than 1:3 afterwards. Schools
potential for providing information, referrals or support to this population of fathers
has not previously been identified.

11

Childs behaviour
Consulting the school was also the most popular choice for fathers regarding their
childs behaviour, with 52.9% of the 13.2% who consulted professional services on
this topic before separation contacting the school and 67.6% of the 33.3% who did
so in the post separation year speaking with the school.
Health professionals were another important source of support here, with 38.2% of
those who sought professional advice regarding their childs behaviour preseparation and 23.9% post separation talking to a doctor. A robust body of research
shows concern for their childrens wellbeing and achievement to be a powerful
motivator for fathers to seek or accept information or support. There is clear
potential for harnessing separated/separating fathers concern for their childrens
behaviour and achievement to offer support to the men themselves through schools
and primary health care.

Section 3: Use of Solicitors

Advice sought from solicitors both before and after separation
We were surprised to find that only 54% of our respondents approached a solicitor
on any topic. Table 6 shows the topics on which they sought advice. While in some
cases these percentages appear high, our survey respondents often skipped these
questions (e.g. only 33 fathers out of 295 answered the question about help-seeking
for tax and benefits) so the numbers of men actually seeking advice on some topics
was low. The topic on which solicitors were most commonly consulted was
contact/residence in the year following separation. However, even in this case only
88.1% of 159 fathers (out of a possible 295 who had participated in the survey iie.
140) said they had spoken to a solicitor on this topic in the post-separation year.
Table 6: Use of a solicitor prior to and following separation
Spoken to a solicitor in the
Spoken to a solicitor
year prior to separation
following separation
(%)
(%)
Contact/Residence
79.1
88.1
Child Maintenance
65.7
81.0
Tax/ benefits
50.4
54.5
Finance/ debts
45.5
58.3
Childs behaviour
11.8
36.6
School Performance
4.1
12.5
Alcohol and substance
15.2
28.3
abuse
Among those who reported speaking to professional services regarding alcohol or
substance abuse, the number of fathers who spoke to a solicitor about this in the
year post-separation (28.3%) was only slightly smaller than those who spoke to a
12

doctor (32.6%)5. Solicitors were also spoken with about childrens behaviour: in the
year post-separation, of those who spoke to professional services regarding their
childs behaviour, 36.6% spoke to a solicitor. As Table 7 reveals, both alcohol/
substance abuse and childrens behaviour were far more likely to be discussed with
solicitors by the fathers after, then before, separation: whether this was as part of
attempts to challenge the quality of mothers parenting cannot be determined from
this survey.
It would also be useful to know whether and when concerns relating to alcohol/drug
use or child behaviour are being raised with solicitors rather than with more
appropriate services simply because these are the only professionals some fathers
speak to; and/or because the men are unaware of other more relevant local services
(if these exist). Future research should examine fathers use of legal services to
speak about these issues, determine whether such conversations deliver costeffective and appropriate support, and explore the availability of other more
appropriate services and strategies to increased fathers use of these.

Section 4: the Internet/helplines

Table 7: Use of internet/helplines by fathers who sought help for specific issues
Subject
Year prior to separation
Year following separation
(%)
(%)
Contact/Residence
2.3
11.9
Child Maintenance
11.4
9.5
Tax/ benefits
37.5
18.2
Finance/ debts
15.2
16.7
Childs behaviour
5.9
7
School Performance
8.2
2.5
Alcohol/substance abuse
2.2
0
Percentages of respondents who sought help for each topic who reported using the
internet or a telephone helpline
It is noteworthy that only a small minority of our respondents reported using the
internet or telephone helplines for help on any issue before or after separation and
the highest usage was for financial matters (Table 7). However, it is worth pointing
out that our question asked the fathers whether they had used these information
sources for help not just for information. Many more may have sought and received
information via the internet/helplines. As already mentioned, the limited nature of
our sample makes it difficult to generalise to the wider population of separated
fathers; however, it is plain that most of the fathers in this sample did not use
internet/helpline support for many of the issues that trouble them.

A lot of men answered questions on alcohol around 75% of the entire sample

13

Conclusion
Our small survey shows that help-seeking by fathers, particularly for relationship
problems, is common in the period before separation, and even more so afterwards.
This is consistent with other studies which have identified active help-seeking by
men at important life-transitions, including in older age (when they use health
services as much as women do, for example) and when they first become fathers.
The birth of a child (particularly the first child) is a time when fathers are particularly
open to help and support (Cowan, 1988) and a recent study found two fifths of
expectant fathers personally seeking information about the process of pregnancy
and birth from their local maternity service (Redshaw & Heikkila, 2010). 6 In addition,
almost all expectant fathers read about pregnancy/ birth/infant development (Lewis,
1986) and discuss such topics with their partner and with friends and family. A
substantial study of more than 1,000 expectant fathers information-seeking about
the birth, found 58% searching on the internet, with substantially higher percentages
among better educated men and men expecting their first child (Johansson et al,
2010).
As our survey shows, a considerable proportion of separating and separated fathers
also seek help on a range of issues. This is not to say that they always approach the
most appropriate sources of support or that services make the most of their helpseeking, particularly in looking beneath the presenting problem. However, it is
clear that the notion that men dont ask for help must be questioned.
There are, of course, fathers who are not seeking or finding professional support at
all. While it is encouraging that over a third of the 89% of fathers who sensed
difficulties in their relationships with their childrens mothers prior to separation had
sought professional support for this issue, that still leaves more than two out of
three suffering in silence with this problem, and even higher proportions
attempting to manage other debilitating problems on their own. The men who
completely fail to obtain support are likely to be men with high needs: other
research has shown that younger, poorer separated fathers are unlikely to see
solicitors (Lewis et al, 2002); and that while younger separated fathers experience
greater mental health challenges than older separated fathers, they are no more
likely to access mental health services (Quinlivan & Condon, 2005). These are also
the men least likely to see their children or provide financial support for them and
for whom, therefore, support is of particular importance.
New initiatives, with a good evaluation history (perhaps imported from other
jurisdictions and adapted for and trialled in the UK) could offer opportunities. Where
such interventions are being trialled in the UK they currently tend to be with families
using the Family Courts. Most of the fathers who need support will therefore never
access them.

The percentage is likely to be higher among first-time fathers

14

Some opportunities to engage with this population of fathers will come from better
responsiveness to the fathers own help-seeking; others will develop from going to
where the fathers are in, for instance, workplaces and jobcentres, as well as
Citizens Advice and other crisis services and specifically seeking to address them via
such intermediaries. Additional, and substantial, opportunities are likely to be
afforded by father-inclusive practice in childrens and family services, health,
education, housing, social care etc. where professionals engaging with other family
members (mothers, children, grandparents) become mindful of fathers (and of
separating and separated fathers) and systematically seek to engage with them.
Training and other needs are certain to be identified if these services are to be
reconfigured for this purpose but may prove cost effective when the importance and
benefits of engaging with, rather than ignoring, separating and separated fathers are
understood and accepted.

Recommendations
There is still much uncertainty in our knowledge of how fathers in general, as well as
separating/separated fathers, access support services, and what barriers may be
preventing their wider use of them. This is particularly true for fathers from more
marginalised social groups - young fathers, fathers on low incomes, fathers from
minority ethnic groups. There is a pressing need for more detailed research to be
undertaken in this area, and with specific attention paid to the ways in which
separated/separating fathers do or dont access support. Such work could benefit a
range of Government Departments involved in supporting families, including the
Department of Health, the Department for Education, the Department for
Communities and Local Government, the Department for Work and Pensions and
the Ministry of Justice.
Services:

Building on this small survey, a substantial study of separating fathers and

mothers help-seeking behaviours and experiences of services should be
undertaken to identify (a) touch points for delivery of support (b)
adjustments needed to existing services (c) gaps in support. Sex, age, SES,
ethnicity and geographical location (rural v. urban) will be important
variables. Recommendations for adjustment of services to meet the needs of
parents of both sexes (and in different circumstances) should be made.
Fathers and mothers use of informal support (family and friends) should be
charted. The quality of support provided by these lay people, its influence
and the mothers and fathers satisfaction with it, should be investigated.
Feasibility studies of interventions with separating/recently separated
individuals (mothers as well as fathers) in community settings (i.e. non-courtbased) and their impact parents adjustment and on child and family
outcomes should be undertaken and evaluated

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Feasibility studies of interventions with professionals (e.g. health visitors, GPs

social workers, solicitors, staff in schools, housing services, childrens centres,
mental health and drugs/alcohol services etc.) to enable staff and managers
to identify and support separating/separated fathers should be undertaken
and evaluated

Employment:

The employment behaviour and mental and physical health of

separated/separating fathers compared with similar fathers who are not
separating or experiencing relationship problems, should be studied.
Studying this among employed mothers would also be instructive.

The feasibility of employment services (including Job Centres) identifying

male applicants who are fathers (normally only the parental status of women
is recorded) and addressing the needs and experiences of
separating/separated fathers should be explored
The capacity and willingness of employers and related services (e.g.
Employee Assistance Programmes, trades unions) to identify and address the
needs of separating/separated fathers and mothers in employment settings
should be explored, as should the willingness of separating/separated fathers
and mothers to seek help for their situations in workplace settings.
The extent to which employers currently support male and female employees
who are experiencing separation (e.g. through facilitating flexible working,
referral to services, counselling and support by line managers and others)
should be investigated. Such factors as public/private sector, gender of
worker, size of team, other company policies e.g. parental leave,
unionisation should be included in the study, as should large, medium and
small employers.

Solicitors / couple relationship support services / Citizens Advice:

These service providers probably see the most separating fathers and therefore
deserve special mention. Exploration of the extent to which they feel equipped to
meet the men needs holistically through really effective signposting (with follow up)
and through provision of inhouse support may be particularly useful.
Internet/telephone helplines:
Fathers usage of these should be properly studied and recommendations made for
the best ways of reaching out to and engaging fathers in general and
separating/separated fathers in particular via internet and social media
Organisations providing financial advice/support, including on child support, should
be particularly addressed.

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REFERENCES
Ballard, K. (1994). Disability, Family, Whanau and Society. Palmerston North, New Zealand: Dunmore
Press.
Bray,J.H. & Kelly, J. (1999). Stepfamilies. New York: Broadway Books.
Lamb, M.E., & Lewis, C. (2004). The development and significance of father-child relationships in twoparent families. In M.E. Lamb (ed.), The Role of the Father in Child Development (4th ed.). Hoboken
NJ: John Wiley & Sons.
Lewis, C., Papcosta, A., & Warin, J. (2002). Cohabitation, separation & fatherhood. York: Joseph
Rowntree Foundation
Quinlivan, J.A., & Condon, J. (2005) Anxiety and depression in fathers in teenage pregnancy.
Australian and New Zealand Journal of Psychiatry, 39 (10), 915920.
Sturge-Apple, M.L., Davies, P.T., & Cummings, E.M. (2006). The impact of hostility and withdrawal in
interparental conflict on parental emotional navailability and children's adjustment. Child
Development, 77(5).
Velleman, R. (2004). Alcohol and drug problems in parents: an overview of the impact on children
and implications for practice. In M. Gopfert, J. Webster & M.V. Seeman (eds.), Parental Psychiatric
nd
Disorder: distressed parents and their families (2 ed.). Cambridge: Cambridge University Press.

For more information contact:

Adrienne Burgess
a.burgess@fatherhoodinstitute.org
07747145146

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