Cultivating Radical Acceptance

Guided Meditations led by Tara Brach

The following meditations, drawn from classical Buddhist practices, awaken us from the trance of separation and fear. Whether the trance arises from a sense of unworthiness, victim-hood, endless striving
or compulsive behavior, it prevents us from rcalizing and living from the radiance and fullness of our
being.
Radical Acceptance is a pathway home. These practices train us to meet life's joys and sorrows with an
awake and open heart. In those moments when we tap into unconditional loving presence, we rediscover the freedom and peace of our true nature.
The ground of any meditation is a sincere attitude. Take some moments at the beginning of each practice to reflect on your intention-what
really matters to you. As one Zen master said, "The most
important thing is to remember the most important thing." When you are connected to the heart's
deepest intention or longing, your meditation practice becomes a current of homecoming, revealing the
truth, awakeness and love that are always, and already, here.

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1) VIPASSANA (MINDFULNESS) MEDITATION
The Buddhist practice for developing mindfulness is called Vipassana, which means "seeing clearly" in
Pali, the language of the Buddha. Mindfulness is cultivated as we intentionally bring a non-judgmental
attention to the moment to moment unfolding of experience. The gift of mindfulness is the blossoming
of our natural wisdom and compassion.
The particular sensations, emotions or thoughts that arise when we practice Vipassana are not so important. By quieting our minds and paying attention to our experience, we develop the capacity to relate to
whatever arises-in meditation and daily life-with clarity and kindness. As the practice of mindful
presence deepens, it gives rise to a natural and liberating realization into the nature of reality and the
truth of what we are.

2) THE POWER OF YES

Suffering arises when we resist the life of the moment. This Yes meditation is an inner practice of acceptance in which we willingly allow our thoughts, emotions and sensations to be JUStas they are. Yes does
not mean we are approving of something or believing our judgments. Rather, the practice honors what
is actually happening. In the moments we say Yes without resistance, Yes with our whole heart, acceptance becomes surrender into truth. By surrenderi ng, we discover the openness and freedom of our true
nature.

It is important to remember that it is not always wise to say Yes to inner experience. If we have been
traumatized in the past, old feelings of terror may be triggered. More generally, we might not have the
balance or resiliency in a particular moment to meer a difficult experience with the openness of Yes. At
times it may be more compassionate ro find some relief or support-perhaps
by spending time with a
trusted friend, walking in nature, lisrening ro music, having tea. Later, we can return to meeting this
moment's experience with the unconditional acceptance of Yes.

3) EMBRACING LIFE WITH A SMILE

In statues and pictures the Buddha is often depicted with a slight smile as he embraces the ten thousand
joys and sorrows. Meditating with the image, feeling and spirit of a smile relaxes our conditioning
towards "fight or flight: and directly reconnects us with the spaciousness and love that is our very
source.
When we create the inner atmosphere of a smile, we are energetically saying Yes to our moment-tomoment experience. Rather than a full "smile-down," as guided in this meditation, you can simply
soften your eyes and assume the half-smile of the Buddha. With practice, you will find that the smile is
a direct and powerful way to reawaken the heart at any moment.

4)

RADICAL ACCEPTANCE OF PAIN

We cultivate Radical Acceptance of pain by relaxing our resistance to unpleasant sensations, and meeting them with open, clear awareness. This exercise is especially useful if you are presently distressed by
physical pain.
If you find that pain feels like "too much," rather than turning against yourself or the pain, let your
response be compassionate. In moments of acute unpleasantness, it can be wise to redirect your attention away from the pain, or to take care of yourself in ways that provide ease and comfort. Then, when
you are able, begin again.

As you practice bringing gentle mindfulness to pain, your ability to meet life with equanimity will
gtoW stronger. You'll be able to let go of resistance more readily, and discover peace and freedom in the
midst of whatever is arising. Presence in the face of pain dissolves the perception of an oppressed,
struggling self-a self who is at war with life. What's revealed is a tender openness that has room for
living and dying.

5) TONGLEN- TRANSFORMING SUFFERING INTO COMPASSION

The Tibetan practice ofTonglen cultivates the ail-embracing heart of compassion. Tonglen means
"taking in and sending out." Linked to the flow of the breath, this practice trains you to open directly
to suffering-your
own and that of all beings-and offer relief and care.
In addition to formal practice periods, whenever you become aware of suffering, you can practice
Tonglen. Right on the SpOt you can breathe in, letting yourself feel the immediacy and sharpness of
hurt, anger or fear. Then by exhaling, you release the pain into the openness of awareness, with a
prayer for relief. In this way, you enlarge the field of compassion for all beings who share your suffering.
The experience of a separate self is perpetuated by resisting and grasping in the face of difficulty. By
imemionaily opening to pain and surrendering it into the vastness of love and awareness, the sense of
separation begins to dissolve. As we widen the circles of awareness to include the suffering of others,
we discover the connectedness and boundless compassion that express our deepest nature.
There are times when Tonglen may be inappropriate. If YOllare struggling with the terror of having
been abused, with unrelenting depression or severe psychological imbalance, Tonglen may cause emotional flooding or a sense of being stuck. In these situations, rather than practice Tonglen, seek guidance from a spiritual teacher or trusted guide who is familiar with this practice. As always, if you are in
an emotional crisis, seek personal or therapeutic support that offers comfort, relief and healing.

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1) CULTNATING A FORGNING HEART
Living with a heart hardened by resentmenr and blame creates a profound sense of separation and suffering. Our capacity for happiness and love is directly related to our ability to forgive. While softening
and opening our hearts cannot be willed, this guided meditation nourishes a willingness that makes
forgiveness possible.