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Uhm, I had a stroke, uh, just before the end of the year.
2014?
2014. And I was in Addenbrookes for, uhm, 16 weeks because I had a stroke.
Uhm, at the end of that period - the next day - I had an epilepsy episode.
Wow. Heavy
Yeah. But, uhm, I feel like every day is a new opportunity really.
Yeah. Ok, cool. Uhm, so after that have you had any more sort of effects from
that. From the epilepsy or anything?
Uhm, yes I - well, uhm, Ive got no use - or virtually no use - of my right arm.
Uhm, and I have a trouble recalling peoples names. And, uhm, I struggle a bit
to follow discussions in the way that I was used to.
In London, yeah.
Yeah, in London. Because my dad was a bus driver and my mum worked in,
uh, a hosiery department in a big store, yeah.
Yeah.
Tony, yeah.
And, uhm, he and I were sat together and uh, giggled! (laughs)
Yeah
Fair enough. So living in London. Could youdo you think you could do that
again?
Yeah, Yeah.
Uhm, my family, uhm, which comprises of, uhm, my wife, Marilyn and, uhm, 2
sons. And theyve ended up with 3 grandchildren as well.
Oh wow, yeah.
Uhm, I was employed by the Civil Service. Actually, it was the PSA.
Ohhh ok.
The Property Services Agency. And uhmI was posted here via Cyprus.
But, uhm, I was posted here because it was the best of what I could do.
Ohh.
Yes!
OK! (laughs)
And that was because they wanted to cut short my posting because I had,
uhm, uhm
Fun?
Uhm, apromotion.
Ohhh ok!
And if they wanted to meet to run out of uhm, if Id spent the rest of my term,
uhm, in Cyprus which my family and I loved, uhm, it would be they would
post me to Newcastle.
Newcastle and you didnt want that, so you chose Cambridge, yeah. Fair
enough. So you sort of got brought here by your job. Do you remember when
that was?
Mmm. No.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yes.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh thats nice.
And, well, she enjoys it as well cos we get a partial day free of me.
(laughs) yeah.
Yeah.
Ohh (laughs). Oh, so she gets the day off work from looking after you?
Ok, yeah.
Well, she got her work cut out with me. Uhm, but, uh, I dont think either of us
have worked for about 5 years. Uhm, Ive done some voluntary work.
Oh really, where?
Oh wow.
Uhm, well, and, uh, that was for The Cogwheel Trust.
Ok.
Oh wow.
Yeah
Thats really really interesting. So, with uhm, that sort of voluntary work and
the private counselling, did, uhm, did that get affected after you had your
stroke or did you choose to stop that?
Oh, ok.
Uhm, so, the stroke acted as the stimulus for (laughs) fading it out completely.
(laughs) yes, the catalyst yeah, so that sort offaded it. Do you miss it at all
or are you sort ofdone with that chapter?
Uhm, Im - I was getting towards the end of the job or the hobby. Uhm, so I
didnt miss it in that way but Ive got a long-term aspiration to get back into
perhaps even supporting Headway. Uhm, andbecause I have an
understanding of people. Uhm, but at the moment Im indisposed (laughs).
Yeah, so, with your, what happened its obviously hard to like
Uhm, Stephen, if we go back a little bit to like your early life and stuff
like that. Uhm, growing up in Clapham and stuff like that - did you have
any brothers or sisters?
Oh lovely.
Yeah. And he spent a lot of his life in the Civil Service. Uhm, and he got so
worried about it he took early retirement and then he, uhm, he got a job as a
magistrate and, uh, that was a voluntary job. Uhm, and, uhm, yeah. Do you
want to know a bit about Geoff?
Uhm, yeah. Ive got a memory of him because I was his older brother and,
uhm, one thing that sticks in my mind definitely, uhm, with - about him is I
gotI think I must have been about 11 and he would have been 8 or
something like that, uhm. He climbed up a tree because he was afraid to get
back to school. And, uh, we wereI I tried to get him down but I think a
teacher came along. Uhm, and so I was a classic big brother really. Uhm, and
uh, the fact that I know his birthdays on today I think is a mark of our
brotherliness, yeah.
Oh, ok.
Uhm, quite good. Uhm, I passed my 11-plus. And, uhmone of the rooms in
the Secondary School had a painting of The Pilgrims Progress around the
wall and, uhm, yeah. The - uh, the literary teacher, he said to me, Stephen
youre a lout and a giggler as well. And I didnt feel very keen on the lout term
but I was quite happy to be known as a giggler (laughs.) Ok?
Uhm, I actually worked, er, in, uhm, County Hall, which was the LCC. I was a
wages clerk and I was quite happy with that. But then the guy who was
running the wages section said to me Stephen, I think you could do much
better than what youre doing, uhm, have you thought about, working, uhm,
becoming a professional? and, uh, that sparked me off thinking and the next
day I visited the firms that were linked to The Royal Institution of Chartered
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Surveyors. And, uhm, that unlike today I got 5 letters to consider working for
these people.
Uhm, and uh, I took the job with a firm called Leslie Dwight and Partners and
again I can make, uhm, my recollection of it is underthe, uhm, the office
was in Regent Street and my primary early duty was to get the umbrella out
and, uhm, go with the partner in charge and, uh, follow him (laughs). And so,
my early days, Uhm, but also I became a Worker-up and then a Taker-off.
These seem like innuendos but (laughs) uhm, they were all part of learning to
be a Quantity Surveyor. Uhm, would you like me to continue with the definition
of my career as far as I can remember?
Please, yes.
Uhm, when Iwhen I realised they reduced my wages when I took a day off,
a day release, and I was a bit miffed by that. So I looked around for a new job
and as time went by, uhm, I became a partner in a small Quantity Surveyor
firm and, uhm, yeah (laughs) another funny story. I became a partner and, uh,
it was just 2 of us. Uhm, and I gradually got to think Im this guys retirement
basis because hes gonna set my wages quite low level on theon the on
thewhats the next word? On the primary reason, uhm, for his picking me.
And, uh, I, he was a nice guy and he worked in Bromley. Uhm, and Ithe
penny dropped for me that - when he said to me, Stephen, we appear to be
using a lot of loo paper and this was like a light to me and so, uh, I left that
job. Uhm, so, then I had a mixed career as a Surveyor and eventually I joined
the PSA, the Property Services Agency and, uh, stayed with them for quite a
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time. Uhm, I was posted initially to Croydon and then, uh, at some time we did
our first of 2, uhm, postings to Cyprus, which was very interesting and, uhm,
beautiful island. But there was a hitch because it was the, uhm, theuh - war
broke out, uhm, and uh, we hung on as long as we could but, uh, we had to
get on a plane and, uh, go home. Uhm, and Iuhm - 6 weeks later, the 3 of
us who had cars went back via the, uhm, canal that runs back because there
were no planes flying at that time. And my second journey out was about 10
years later and, uhm, I lived on a garrison, uhm, and that was very nice and,
uhwhat I realised is, as a civilian, all the, the forces were there and they
couldnt work out when my -where I was in the pecking order. Uhm, and my
wife got asked the same question and she noticed that some people drifted
away and other people lingered on and it was all to do with rank and, yeah.
Ok. Uhm, I talked about my faith - I wanted to talk about it.
Mmm, please.
Uhm, as a, uh, as a Junior Boy in the Boys Brigade, uhm, I went to a Baptist
Church, and Im still a Baptist at heart but weve spent a lot of time in other
churches as well. Uhm, and I decided on - I made a commitment to - Jesus.
And, uhm, that was at, uhm, the common, uh, yeah, the common on the Isle
of White where we were camping and, uhm, what followed from that was I
kept talking, uh, saying to my parents Ive got something to tell you and then
theyd say What? and I could never bring myself to say what it was, but
eventually I told them. I said Id become a Christian and they just were
pleased because at that time they werent really Christians, uhm, but then,
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eventually theyuh, joined the church, uhm, which leads me into my wife.
Uhm, my wife became a Christian, uh, a little, while later and she was in a
Baptismal class which included my mum and dad.
Uhm, she was at a party. Oh, we had a lot of parties in those days and I
suddenly realised that my brother Geoff was talking to, uhm, my wife is short
and Im tall. And, uh, my brother is equally tall and I was concerned because,
uhm, she should have been talking to me! (laughs) And uhm, I muscled in on
the act and, uh, after a time proposed and got engaged and got married to her
and Im still married to her.
Was itwere you quick to propose after you met her? Or did it - were you
together fora time before that?
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Yeah! (laughs) Do you think, uhm, well like, cos you said she became, well,
Christian later. So did you have a really sort of, uh, Christian wedding then?
Or she was Christian by the time you got married, yeah?
Yes. Yeah, and uhm, I have a recollection that, uhm, she also was at that
stage, uh, a dentist receptionist.
Oh ok.
Uhm, and so, when we got married. Uhm, it was Balham where we went to
church and my family then was quite a large family and when we came out
from the service all along the, uhm, - the row on the top of the, uhon the top
of the constraint for people visiting the public library, which was on the other
side of the road. And they were a huge queue of people wanting to get a
glimpse of Marilyn! And, uh, I thought, Ive married someone special, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, uhm, (laughs). James and Peter. James was 5 years older than Peter
and, uhm, Peters become a filmmaker and James has become, uhm, a
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similar art thing. Uhm, and, uhPeter, uhm, is taken up with a wide range of
filmmaking. Uhm, and James, uh, is equally occupied with his career and hes
a package designer. So theyve both got an architecta, uh, an artistic bent,
uhm and, uh, I dont know where that comes from (laughs). And James has
got 3, uh, theyre 3 children for him and theyre grandchildren for me and my
wife, yeah.
Uhm, yes. The one son has had 3 children and the other one has married a
Russian girl, uhm, but no children yet.
Can you tell us a little bit about the actualabout the stroke itself, kind
ofwhere it happened what happened and stuff like that if you dont
mind?
Thank you.
Uhm, yeah. It happened in, uh, our bedroom and, uhmmy wife was on the
verge of going out because she thought I was having a deep sleep, but little
did she understand that it was a stroke, uhm, and fortunately she, uhm,
realised it was a stroke and then she sounded alarms. Uhm, and, uh, with this
seizure, uhm, I then got into Addenbrookes and I spent 16 weeks in
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Addenbrookes and, uh, the last 2 weeks of which I was very pleased the way
they treated me, uh, because I got a chance to ride a motorised vehicle and
so I rode - went round all the clinics and things and waved around, so (laughs)
uhm, yeah. But the next day I surfaced from that stroke. I had epilepsy and
that was a new experience for me, uhm, and thats been a relatively, uh,
continuing challenge to me because, uhm, other than currently, I was stroking,
uhm, about every 4 weeks or so, uhm, but now Im on medication which
fortunately seems to be holding that at bay.
Uhm, I think they were, yeah. Uhm, and thats a fairly common event from
people who have a stroke to have it followed on by the epilepsy, or if they
were epileptic in the past they become much morepresenting as epilepsy,
yeah.
Yeah, UhmI think, well for a time II didnt understand what it was that I
had. Uhm, and II had, uhm, a time in hospital, which Ive mentioned
already. Uhm, so when I came out from hospital, uhm, and I was preoccupied
with getting better and, uhm, and part of my recovery is, uhm, like coming to
this place. Uhm, which Im grateful for and, uhm, yeah. So, uhm, my hospital
no - my GP is very knowledgeable about strokes and, uhm, hes followed my
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Yeah, Yeah. And, uhm, yeah, I think, well, we actually go to The United
Reform Church in Fulbourn. Uhm, and thats been good for me and my wife.
And, uhm, we got we changed churches actually. And, uhm, where weve
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gone to now, weve had lots of encouragement uhm, and uhm, also at a
deeper level, uhm, I dont think of God in a judgemental sense. I think - I still
think he is a loving God, but he has designed this phase of my life, uhm, and
its opened up new, uh, opportunities for our neighbours and all the rest of it.
And so weve got a - I darent say better life - a different life and its enhanced
by being here.
Yes, I do.
Uhm.
YeahI think, uhm, when I was in Addenbrookes, uh, and they put me on
the- a rehabilitation course in the hospital. Uhm, but the penny didnt drop in
that, uhm, I was gonna have a long post experience and, uhm, like I said they
I had - the 2 weeks in Addenbrookes was quite fun at the end of the
experience and, uhm, I thought that was the key. Uhm, but having come out
of hospital, uh, and being confronted by all the exercises that you need to
do and also the busy-ness of our lives and the catching up with my wife whos
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Well as I hinted at earlier, uhm, yes. Im, uh, Im facing new challenges and,
uhm, some of them are quite difficult to face up to, uhm, but others present
new opportunities. Uhm, and they I the question you asked me was that
what did I think of, uh, as a by-product of having a stroke. Uhm, Ive got, uh, a
lot of unused bits, like my arm. Uhm, but Im going to Addenbrookes this
afternoon to have a look at things and perhaps even have a Botox injection.
Uhm, but, uh, so Im trying desperately to hook into all the possible ways and
means of getting a bit of bit more uh, a bit less disabled, but I still suspect
that, uhm, there could be a residue from this stroke, uhm, but I think, uhm,
Im working at it.
Ive talked about my sons and my wifeand grandchildren. Uhm, I dont think
so really. I think Ive touched on, uhm, the bulk of my life so, uhm, Id like to
blow the whistle at this point.
(laughs) Awesome.
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Thank you.
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