Inprove Writing

Version 11.
1/January 7, 2013
Improve Your Writing Skills

A Message from John Bachner
Professionals are societys best. Thats why people expect technical professionals to write
effectively, be it in formal submissions, such as proposals and reports, or in minutes,
memoranda, letters, e-mail, texts, and so on. (Because you are a professional, formal
actually describes everything you write in your professional capacity.) Better writing can
help prevent the miscommunication that leads to misunderstandings, and possibly more
important it can limit another party's ability to allege your miscommunication was the
cause of a problem, an indicator of a careless attitude (that could have infected everything
you did), or proof that you are not worthy of being recognized as a professional.
Recognize that claims and disputes tend to arise two or more years after you complete
your services. At that time, the best evidence almost always is what's in writing. What
will the trier of fact a jury, usually think about your writing? Will it comport with the
trier of facts image of a professional? Opposing counsel will be quick to remind the jury
that, for technical professionals (who are paid a great deal of money in order to provide a
perfect result!), words equal numbers. If a jury reviews a letter, e-mail, proposal, report,
or other communication you have written, could it be convinced that you were in too
much of a hurry to be accurate and thereby caused the problem or made it worse?
The numbers that reviewers mark on your FOPP submissions refer to issues listed below.
We identify your mistakes so you can learn and improve. Unless a reviewer indicates
otherwise, you do not need to revise a submission and resubmit it, except in the case of
your draft report (your second report submission), which reviewers will examine with
particular interest. They will expect you to submit a final report whose quality indicates
you have considered the reviewers comments carefully. Note: The person who reviews
your draft report will not identify all examples of a given problem: Doing so, and fixing
each, is your responsibility; i.e., if the reviewer notes that you have used an expletive, we
expect you to check the entire submission for expletives. (Ideally, you should check all
submissions for everything.)
If you have any questions about what I've written below or on your submission, contact
me.

Version 11.1
Copyright 2013. All rights reserved.

Reproduction by any means whatsoever, print,
electronic, or otherwise, is expressly forbidden,
except with the written permission of John P. Bachner.
CONTENTS
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
11.
12.
13.
14.
15.
16.
17.
18.
19.
20.
21.
22.
23.
24.
25.
26.
27.
Do Not Assume
Proofread Effectively
a. In General
b. Eliminate Cut-and-Paste and
Header/Footer Errors
Avoid Taboo Words, Including
Absolutes
Check Your Spelling
Beware of Hazardous Homophones
Correct Accidental Words
Eliminate Slipshod Synonyms
Be More Precise
Eliminate Danglers
Change Words That Have Two (or
More) Meanings
Change Subjective Modifiers
Delete Useless Words
Simplify Your Language
Make Subject and Verb Agree
Avoid the Passive Voice; Use the
Active Unless Doing So Would Be
Inappropriate
a. In General
b. Dont Anthropomorphize
Avoid Expletives
Watch out for Pronouns
Avoid Colloquialisms
Avoid Jargon
Indicate Numbers Properly
Don't Put Too Much Space between
the Subject and the Verb
Reorganize To Help Eliminate
Confusion
Shorter Sentences Are Best
Manage Multiple Modifiers
Don't Use the Verb To Be So Much
Maintain Parallel Construction in
Lists
Apply Effective List Syntax
28.
29.
30.
31.
32.
33.
34.
35.
36.
37.
38.
39.
40.
41.
42.
43.
44.
45.
Consider Other List Issues

Consider the Visual Component of
Written Communication
Use Correct Professional Terminology
Capitalize Properly
a. Proper Nouns
b. Titles
c. For Purposes of Differentiation
d. Acronyms
e. Publication Titles
Replace Clichs and Archaisms
Go around Each (and Other Words
That Have the Same Effect), He, She
Indicate Possessives Properly
Understand Parentheses and
Punctuate Properly When Using Them
Punctuate Properly inside Quotes and
outside
Use Single Quotes Properly
Get e.g. and i.e. Right
Realize That And and & Are Not
the Same
Tell the Reader What Is, Not What
Isnt
Enhance Your Correspondence Style
a. Salutation
b. Attention and Salutation
c. The Letter Is Not from You
d. Attach, Append, Enclose
e. Letterhead
f. Transmittal Sheet
Be Consistent
Warn Readers When a Document Is a
Draft
Abbreviate Dates So Your Intent Is
Unmistakable
Dont Add a List-Ender When
Exemplifying

Version 11.1

1.
Do Not Assume
If you absolutely must make an assumption, be certain to somehow footnote it or
comment parenthetically that you have made an assumption that you will correct
or verify later. For example, do not assume that ASFE is an acronym for
American Society of Foundation Engineers, or that Dr. Someone is a Ph.D., as
opposed to a D.Eng., D.Ed., or Sc.D. The most serious mistakes FOPP
participants make occur because of assumptions, almost all of which they could
have avoided by placing a telephone call.
2.
Proofread Effectively
a. In General
Given that words in an instrument of professional service equal numbers, and that
many contain numbers, too, proofreading is essential. (Design professionals have
had to pay $150,000 and more just for one misplaced decimal point. They've had
to pay far more because of wording problems.) Proofreading is not reading
something over and over again: It is an art. Read critical passages backwards, so
your eye will not skip ahead. Check certain features serially; e.g., check all
headlines separately; check all subheads separately; check listing methods
separately to help ensure consistency; and so on. (Also refer to no. 26, Maintain
Parallel Construction in Lists.)
Whenever you can check something against a source document, do so. For
example, I (as any client representative) will be most upset if you spell my name
incorrectly, bollix ASFEs address, write Silver Springs instead of Silver Spring,
etc.
Note that gross errors should be catchable even with reading-it-over-and-overagain proofing. If gross errors exist in one of your submissions to FOPP, I (just
as any client representative) will be offended, because you apparently dont care
enough about me to consider me worthy of the high-quality deliverable I selected
you to provide. This disrespect (for which I pay! At home its free) will anger me,
just as it would any client representative. (An attorney for the other side in a
dispute would lead the jury to conclude you are not particularly professional,
despite all the money you're paid.) Please do not insult me.
b. Eliminate Cut-and-Paste and Header/Footer Errors
Cutting and pasting makes it easy to make mistakes; so does the reuse of headers
and/or footers. FOPP staff tends to grade such mistakes harshly in hopes that our
unfair attitude reminds you to be particularly careful about checking your cut-andpaste work and headers and footers in the future. Bear in mind that the first report
submission is your research plan or research proposal. Your second submission is
your draft final report. If you title your second submission what you titled your

Version 11.1

first submission, we will penalize you heavily, because you should have read this
warning.
One way to remind yourself to check cut-and-paste inserts and headers and
footers: Use a different typeface or type color for any reused material. Revert to
the appropriate typeface or color only after you have double-checked what you
have reused.
3.
Avoid Taboo Words, Including Absolutes

You should already know most of the taboo words. They include words like
certify, guarantee, warrant, inspect, ensure, safety, and product. ASFE has more
material about them, if you need it. Refer to ASFE Practice Alert No. 5.
Absolute words usually are taboo as well, because they presuppose conditions that
generally do not or cannot exist. For example, virtually no site in the world can be
free of contaminants, given that any site is likely to have on it a speck of
contaminant, even if it is only a billionth of a trillionth of a micron. So do not use
words like free of, full, empty, all, none, minimize, maximize, everyone, totally,
and must unless you do so carefully. Recognize that unique is an absolute. So are
perfect, circular, square, and bald, among many others. (And, by the way,
because they are absolutes, they cannot be used in a comparative sense; i.e.,
something cannot be more unique than something else, just as it cannot be more
perfect, more ideal, or more circular. True, one could have a meal that is squarer
than another, but, in that sense, square does not refer to a shape.)
Let's be real: I know that Everyone there was bald. probably means Many of the
men there were affected by male-pattern baldness. Let's also be real: What you
write as a professional; what you put into your instruments of professional
service, should not have to be interpreted to be understood unequivocally, because
by definition if it has to be interpreted, it cannot be unequivocal. For more on
absolutes, refer to ASFE Practice Alert No. 13.
4.
Check Your Spelling

Society expects technical professionals to know how to spell. Use a spellchecking feature, but do not overrely on it. Foregoing a personnel analyses wood
effect yew. (Yes, every word of the prior sentence, except a, is misspelled, but
would be deemed correct by spelling-check software. See, also, Hazardous
Homophones and Accidental Words, below.) Imagine hearing this question asked
of you while you're on the witness stand: You don't even know how to spell, do
you? How many jury members might ask themselves, Gosh, if the technical
professional can't even spell, how can I have faith in the professional's ability to
add and subtract? or If the person doesn't take the time to proofread what's been
written, how can I have faith that the person double-checked the calculations?
Understand the Latin expression, Falsus in uno, falsus in omnibus. Lawyers
understand it. Look it up.

Version 11.1

5.
Beware of Hazardous Homophones

Hazardous homophones are two (or more) words that are pronounced the same,
but are spelled differently and have different meanings. These include, among
many others:
effect/affect,
principal/principle,
compliment/complement,
stationary/stationery,
forgo/forego, and
canvas/canvass.
Recognize these words when you use them. Be sure to use the correct word.
6.
Correct Accidental Words

Accidental words are real words you do not intend, typically because of a
keyboarding error. Chances are you have already written manger when you
meant manager, mater instead of matter, and posses (Shoot low, men. Theyre
riding Shetlands.) rather than possess. A spell checker will not help; you are on
your own. (By the way, note that email (pronounced ay-my) is a color.)
7.
Eliminate Slipshod Synonyms

A slipshod synonym is a word thats similar to but is not the correct word for
the application. Common slipshod synonyms include infer instead of imply, hone
rather than home (as in home in on), dubious in the place of doubtful, and mute
when whats meant is moot. At best, slipshod synonyms tarnish your image by
demonstrating you dont know what somewhat simple words mean. At worst,
they can alter your meaning and give a crafty attorney a hook onto which to hang
a litigious hat. Please note that as does not equal because, determine does not
equal identify, and feel does not equal believe. However, verbal does mean oral.
Regrettably, it also means written. (Get more guidance in no. 8, Be More Precise,
and no. 10, Change Words That Have Two (or More) Meanings.)
8.
Be More Precise
Think things through in order to be precise. For example, I believe this research
assignment will help me implies I believe that performing this research
assignment will help me, but it doesn't say it. Likewise, when you list things in
order of preference, are you listing them in descending order or ascending order?
(I also cover this in no. 28, Consider Other List Issues.) Beware, too, of using the
wrong word because you didnt think something through; e.g., writing on a faxcover sheet, I attach a copy of my letter. In fact, you cannot attach anything by
fax; you only can append. (Also review no. 41(d), Enhance Your Correspondence
Style/Attach, Append, Enclose.) And in that respect, realize that you cannot
append my research topic, nor can you enclose it (in an envelope) or attach it
(via staple or paper clip) to a letter, because a topic has no physical form.

Version 11.1

Recognize, too, that, while a topic is part of a research assignment description, a

research assignment description is not a topic.
Note the significant difference between client and client representative. A
client is almost always an entity of some type (e.g., a business or government
agency). A client representative is a person who works in an organization (the
client) and usually must report to higher-ups who have a major influence on the
individuals future. Being cognizant of the difference can change your outlook on
certain things, given that a clients chief decision-makers can give client
representatives a considerable amount of grief when a consultants broken
promise forces them to furnish deliverables late and/or over budget. (Note that the
same higher-ups can treat client representatives as heroes when the latter are able
to provide consultants deliverables ahead of schedule and/or under budget. Client
representatives love that outcome and the people who make it happen for them.)
Also note the difference between survey (a process) and questionnaire (a survey
instrument); between evaluating questionnaires and evaluating questionnaire
responses.
This is important stuff! If you usually communicate in too casual a manner, you
will be unable to communicate precisely when you need to. Get into the habit of
being a nitpicker, because thats the only hope you have of being precise or, at
least, less casual.
9.
Eliminate Danglers
A dangler (or misplaced modifier) is a modifying clause that typically appears
at the beginning of a sentence, and fails to modify the word it is intended to. In
fact, the first word after the dangler is the word that the dangler modifies.
Consider this example from an actual FOPP submission:
As requested, this letter provides my preferred choices for the required
research project.
As written, the sentence says that FOPP asked the letter not the author of the
letter to provide preferred choices. And what about provide? Can a letter
actually provide its authors choices, or does it indicate or identify those choices?
A more accurate approach might take this form:
As you requested, I am submitting this letter to indicate my preferred
choices for the required research project.
Then we could shorten the sentence by eliminating what should be obvious, to
derive:

Version 11.1

My FOPP Class 12 research project choices are, in descending order of

preference:...
Danglers often take the form of dangling participles, referring to the ing
form of verbs. For example:
Burning the midnight oil, his paper was completed on time.
As stated, the phrase indicates that his paper was burning the midnight oil.
To correctly convey the thought, the author should have written:
Burning the midnight oil, he completed his paper on time.
Its easy to tell what a FOPP participant meant when he included the following on
his letter requesting a research topic:
After discussions with principals and others within my firm, a common
theme emerged:
In my minds eye, I see a common theme wearily exiting a conference room!
How about this gem:
In addition to being less expensive, regulators in New Hampshire and
Vermont
Some guides to English usage say that, because danglers are so common, they are
acceptable, as long as the intent is clear. I disagree. Professionals for whom every
word is the equivalent of a number cannot afford to be sloppy.
10.
Change Words That Have Two (or More) Meanings

A number of words have two (or more) meanings that could fit within the context
of what youre writing. Use alternative words, if you can; e.g., more than is better
(I believe) than over when talking about quantities, because over also relates to
physical position. Likewise, I believe that because is better than since. (As is a
slipshod synonym for because.)
Another approach for creating understanding is to add explanations
(parenthetically would be okay; a definitions section or glossary might work, too)
that make it about impossible for a reasonably intelligent person to misunderstand
you.
If you promise to do something biweekly, will you do it twice a week or once
every other week, assuming you keep your promise? Its better to promise twice a
week, if thats what you mean.

Version 11.1

What if the community sanctions you? Does that suggest that the community
trusts you implicitly? Or does it imply that the community really distrusts you?
Because sanction has two, diametrically opposed meanings, either interpretation
would be correct. The same holds true for oversight. Is it something you miss or
the process of trying not to miss anything?
And what about verbal? It means oral and it means written, because oral
communication and written communication both are enabled by words. Note, too,
that e-mail (or E-mail) has one meaning, but email has two (at least).
11.
Change Subjective Modifiers

Subjective modifiers retard communication, because a writer's concepts or biases
may be radically different from a readers. Consider:
A large tree...
An unusual color...
A loud noise...
and the like. If I see a 100-foot-tall tree and describe it as large, but one of the
persons reading what I've written believes that a tree has to be at least 500-feet
high to be large, I've miscommunicated, and I might do so every time someone
else reads what Ive written. Therefore, when preparing an instrument of
professional service and everything you submit for FOPP is exactly that try to
manage your communication such that readers can visualize what it is youre
using modifiers to describe:
The tree was approximately 75 feet tall, with a circumference of ten feet at
its base.
With respect to the standard classification color chart, the subject color
seemed to be composed of 20 percent...
I heard a noise much akin to that of a truck backfire.
How much larger than large is very large? How much more unusual is quite
unusual? Generally speaking, very, quite, and words of that nature have no place
in your professional writing.
12.
Delete Useless Words

Any number of useless words are used in conversation and writing we read every
day; e.g., in advertisements, newspaper items, and magazine articles. That does

Version 11.1

not mean that using useless words is right or wise. An example from a FOPP
submission:
This area presents many different challenges.
Of course the challenges are different! If they weren't, many would not exist. I
had five different ideas. Well, of course your five ideas were different. If two
were the same, you'd have had only four ideas.
We also see references to past experience. Unless we specifically say present
experience or future experience, one has to assume that the experience in question
is from the past, making past experience equal experience, which means past is
useless.
I will obtain and review [something] also is a popular phrase, although how one
reviews something one cannot obtain I don't know. As such, obtain and becomes
useless. In a similar manner, some folks like to write I will review available
information. The same concept applies: If it isn't available, you cannot review it,
making available useless. Note, however, that readily available has a different
meaning; i.e., I will only review the stuff I can get my hands on quickly.
What about this phrase:
I will identify possible options.
If an option were not possible, it wouldn't be an option.
Be mindful, too, about words and phrases that are useless because of the tense of
the verb. As an example:
All our lines currently are busy.
The verb are is in the present tense, meaning the action is happening now. Just as
it would be illogical to say all lines are busy in the future or are busy in the past,
so is it unnecessary to say they are currently busy. Are busy says the same thing,
making currently useless. In a similar manner, a vague reference to the future is
useless when you use the future tense; e.g., I will be more careful means the same
as I will be more careful in the future. Note, however, that it does not mean the
same as I will be more careful next Wednesday.
Think about the words you use. If they don't add anything, delete them.
13.
Simplify Your Language

Simplify your language when possible, so it is easier for readers to understand it.
Don't try to sound formal even in your formal writing, unless you have some

Version 11.1

important reason to do so. Note, too, that language that obviously tries to sound
formal can make the author sound stuffy or pompous. In addition, it can lead to
convolution. For example, why write We will provide you with the report. when
you can just as easily say We will give you the report. or We will deliver the
report to you on.? Likewise, why write I am writing regarding my assignment.
when you can write I am writing about my assignment. or better yet I write
about my assignment.? Honestly, isn't I want you to write better. better than I
would like you to write better.? Isnt it better to use simpler words than to utilize
them?
Lately I've noticed FOPP participants' overuse and misuse of however. Except
when it is used to begin a sentence, however should be set off by commas; e.g., I
like to eat meat, however, it gives me gas. The common error is to leave off the
comma after the word, possibly from the mistaken belief that however and but are
interchangeable. They are not and, more often than not, but is the better word: I
like to eat meat, but it gives me gas.
14.
Make Subject and Verb Agree

While grammar tends to be democratic almost to the point of anarchy, most
experts agree that the subject and verb should agree; i.e., a plural subject
requires a plural verb, and a singular subject requires a singular verb. Examples:
Wrong:
I are happy to see you.
Right:
I am happy to see you.
Some situations are more difficult to discern, but if sixth-graders can do it, you
should be able to, too. If you do not score 100% on the following quiz, admit to
yourself that you need to spend an hour or so relearning some things. Which of
the following are correct, and which are not?
Jim, as well as Tom, were slated for promotion.
Either the two project managers or Larry were opposed to holding the
FOPP seminar in Paris.
Drinking and driving makes for a deadly mix.
Client retention and cultivation is a business essential.
Jerry, in addition to everyone else in the class, love the FOPP program.
Jerry and everyone else in the class loves the FOPP program.
10

Version 11.1
15.

Avoid the Passive Voice; Use the Active Unless Doing So Would Be
Inappropriate
a. In General
The passive voice usually deadens writing, often makes it difficult to follow
(leading to confusion), and worst of all can encourage you to leave out vitally
important information. What is the passive voice? It is sentence structure that fails
to identify who or what took the action indicated by the verb, or does so in a
convoluted fashion, by making the subject of the verb the object of the preposition
by. Example:
The ball was hit by John.
Too often, especially when we're in a hurry, we can forget the by part, and thus
write, The ball was hit, or A decision was made not to conduct the testing.
Writers commonly use an expletive phrase (discussed in no. 16, Avoid Expletives)
to introduce a sentence or clause written in the passive voice; e.g., It was a
terrible thing. In professional material you prepare, terrible thing would be an
opinion. The question thus becomes, whose opinion? To answer that question: I
thought it was a terrible thing. or I believe just about all of us thought it was a
terrible thing.
The active voice is usually better (but see no. 21, Don't Put Too Much Space
between the Subject and the Verb) following the simple sentence structure of
Subject (noun (preferably) or pronoun)
Verb
Object
or, in the case of intransitive verbs,

Subject (noun (preferably) or pronoun)
preposition)
Verb
Preposition
Object (of
By applying a simple active structure, we would get, John hit the ball, or John
Doe, the client's representative on site, told me about 11:00 AM on March 31,
while we were both on site, that he decided to forgo the testing we had proposed
in our letter of February 13.
b. Dont Anthropomorphize
Note that the use of anthropomorphization to get around the passive can be mindbendingly bothersome; e.g., This research assignment will analyze the reasons for
bad writing. Assignments dont analyze things; people do. How much more
effective it would be to write, I will analyze the reasons for bad writing.
16.
Avoid Expletives
11

Version 11.1

The words it and there have no meaning (are expletives) when used with
(typically) the verb to be, as in, There are far too many ding-dong requirements
in this course. Write with fewer words, not only to give your words more power,
but also to reduce:
the number of words needed to relate an idea;
the intimidation created by too many words and, thus, delays in reading
them;
a desire to not have to read your stuff because it's always long-winded; and
opportunities for confusion.
To write without expletives, which are usually unnecessary, just eliminate them
and reconstruct the sentence. Doing so with the above, we derive:
... far too many ding-dong requirements in this course.
The easy conversion is:
This course has far too many ding-dong requirements.
While you're at reconstruction, however, you could say that has is really kind of a
dead word. After all, verbs should connote action whenever possible, and has
doesn't do much of that. Thus, you could say:
This course is plagued by far too many ding-dong requirements.
But why use the passive voice, where the subject of the action (the ding-dong
requirements that do the plaguing) becomes the object of the preposition by? By
converting the sentence to the active voice, we would get:
Far too many ding-dong requirements plague this course.
Now we're getting somewhere! Except we can ask, How many too many is far
too many? Far can be a misleading word, because it reflects your opinion, and
your opinion is hardly a universal. As noted in no. 11, Change Subjective
Modifiers, your far too many may be someone else's not really a lot. Either be
exact without conveying an opinion 15 ding-dong requirements or eliminate
the use of misleading words. Choosing the latter, we would get:
Too many ding-dong requirements plague this course.
How many are too many?
Many ding-dong requirements plague this course.
12

Version 11.1

Oh, and some of the ding-dong requirements don't plague the course? As long as
you could categorize more than one of the requirements as ding-dong, you
could/should write:
Ding-dong requirements plague this course.
The result is a sentence that uses half the words as the original, loses no accuracy,
and gains power. After you practice this type of approach for a while, you will
discover that you can do this type of editing quickly. You need to. Remember:
Your words equal numbers.
17.
Watch out for Pronouns

Pronouns tend to be dangerous words, because determining the correct antecedent
can be so difficult. It and its tend to be the most common problem-causers, along
with their and theirs. Examples:
A review of findings will permit a conclusion. It will indicate...
What will indicate? A review or the conclusion?
We will develop seminars designed to address the weaknesses identified
through surveys. We will evaluate their effectiveness through interviews.
Does their refer to the effectiveness of the seminars, the effectiveness of the
weaknesses, or the effectiveness of the surveys?
Heres yet another from an FOPP participants submission:
I have also contacted each respective project manager to gain an
understanding of the project, our firms scope of service, and the current
status of each.
The question is, current status of each what? the project manager? project?
scope?
For purposes of clarity, consider repeating what you otherwise would reference
through a pronoun. When using pronouns to refer to people (he, him, her, they,
them, etc.) in reports, memoranda, correspondence, DFRs, et al., consider using
initials/acronyms to avoid confusion, especially the confusion that can arise when
what you have written is reviewed years after you write it; e.g.:
I saw John Bachner (JB) hitting John Doe (JD), a FOPP participant, with
a stick. JD was unhappy.
13

Version 11.1

The alternative to the foregoing He was unhappy would leave it unclear as to

who the unhappy person was.
Note that a company is an it, not a they:
Wrong: ABC Associates reviewed their documentation policy.
Right: ABC Associates reviewed its documentation policy.
Also note that a person is a who, not a that:
Wrong: The person that was supposed to edit this for me
Right: The person who was supposed to edit this for me
Proper use of personal pronouns in particular (I, mine, he, its, etc.) requires a solid
grasp of grammatical fundamentals; e.g., knowing when to use the objective form
(whom) and when to use the nominative (who). (Also refer to nos. 33, Go around
Each (and Other Words That Have the Same Effect), He, She and 34, Indicate
Possessives Properly.)
18.
Avoid Colloquialisms
Colloquialisms are a form of jargon, except they sometimes don't make sense,
given that they tend to be subjective. For example, one FOPP participant said his
firm was well-rounded. I'm confident this made perfect sense to him, but I had no
idea of what he meant. Also avoid colloquialisms that are too informal for
professional correspondence; e.g., Here ya go. and Wazzup?.
19.
Avoid Jargon
Avoid jargon or the argot of your profession. Do not assume others are familiar
with it. If you must use it, be sure to explain it when you introduce it at first.
Example:
We provide computer-aided design and drafting (CADD) services. In fact,
our CADD services are...
20.
Indicate Numbers Properly

For the most part, you should spell out numbers one through ten (some say
twelve); represent higher numbers via numerals. Spell out numbers that begin a
sentence, and consider following them (parenthetically) by numerals; e.g.,
Seventy-eight (78) trombones led the significant marching assembly. Always
following a spelled-out number with the number in parentheses may be wise for
contracts, but in a text, it can get in the way.
14

Version 11.1

For purposes of consistency, numbers modifying the same measure should be in

the same format. In the example sentence that follows, three and ten are
expressed as numerals, to be consistent with the numeral 60:
In ten days, FOPP class registration increased from 3 to 10 to 60.
Generally, numerals are used with a symbol (8%, $5, 3F), but do or do not
(depending on the style reference you use) have to be applied when the symbol is
spelled out (eight percent, five dollars, three degrees Fahrenheit).
21.
Don't Put Too Much Space between the Subject and the Verb
Here's a sentence taken from a FOPP submission:
Many factors, including regional economies, requirements for local or
specific expertise, individual office profit pressures, company culture,
logistical considerations, and scheduling deadlines create impediments for
movement of work between offices.
By the time we get to the verb (create), we've forgotten what the subject was.
Several possible improvements would make the sentence easier to follow and, as
such, more considerate of the reader.
One fix is to delete the useless words Many factors, including, to derive:
Regional economies, requirements for local or specific expertise,
individual office profit and loss pressures, company culture, logistical
considerations, and scheduling deadlines create impediments for
movement of work between offices.
Realistically, that's not a good fix, because the expansiveness of the subject still
gets in the way of comprehension. A better improvement is:
Many factors create impediments for movement of work between offices.
These include regional economies, requirements for local or specific
expertise, individual office profit and loss pressures, company culture,
logistical considerations, and scheduling deadlines.
Because create impediments means impede, we could substitute the latter word to
get...
Many factors impede the movement of work between offices. These include
regional economies, requirements for local or specific expertise,
considerations, and scheduling deadlines.
15

Version 11.1

Another modification might be:

Many factors impede the movement of work between offices; e.g., regional
economies, requirements for local or specific expertise, individual office
profit and loss pressures, company culture, logistical considerations, and
scheduling deadlines.
This is also a situation where the passive voice may work out well:
The movement of work between offices is impeded by factors such as
regional economies, requirements for local or specific expertise,
considerations, and scheduling deadlines.
22.
Reorganize To Help Eliminate Confusion

Often, just a slight reorganization of a sentence can eliminate confusion. Heres
an actual sentence:
I propose to work with four other members of my firm currently enrolled
in FOPP to develop a reference manual for the firm that addresses field
observation and materials testing.
The organization is such that we could ask, What will address field observation
and materials testing? The manual or the firm? Watch what happens by virtue of
simple reorganization:
I propose to work with four other members of my firm currently enrolled
in FOPP to develop for the firm a reference manual that addresses field
observation and materials testing.
23.
Shorter Sentences Are Best

Keep your sentences short. They generate less confusion and are easier to follow.
But dont use them to excess; combine where appropriate. (In other words, learn
how to edit yourself!) Heres an example:
I completed my review of ASFEs assignment compendium and
supplemental reading list and herein submit my preferences for the
assigned research topic. My selections, in descending order of preference,
are:
We could start by breaking two sentences into three, by taking the first long
sentence and turning it into two sentences:
16

Version 11.1


supplemental reading list. I herein submit my preferences for the assigned
research topic. My selections, in descending order of preference, are:
Now, pruning some excess verbiage (I herein submit, etc.), we would go back to
two sentences:
supplemental reading list. My preferences for the assigned research topic,
in descending order of preference, are:
Better? Absolutely. Realistically, however, we can eliminate the first sentence, for
two reasons. First, the supplemental reading list news is extraneous; it has
nothing to do with anything else. Second, the writer must have reviewed the
assignment compendium to have selected topics, thus putting the news into the
it goes without saying department. And that gives us
My preferences for the assigned research topic, in descending order of
preference, are:
But hold on! The subject and verb do not have to be as far apart. We can easily
say
My preferences for the assigned research topic are, in descending order of
preference:
The use of preference and preferences in the same sentence is bothersome,
however, and when you look closely unnecessary. Which gets us to
My preferences for the assigned research topic are, in descending order:
But were still not there! What is an assigned research topic? Probably whats
meant (see no. 8, Be More Precise) is:
My preferences for the research assignment are, in descending order:
which we can easily shorten to:
My research assignment preferences are, in descending order:
Whew.
24.
Manage Multiple Modifiers

Adjectives modify nouns. Adverbs modify verbs, adjectives, and other adverbs.
As a general rule, when you use two adjectives to modify a noun, you separate the
17

Version 11.1

two modifiers with a comma. You do not do that with adverbs. As such, dirty,
blond hair would mean blond hair that had not been washed in a while, while
dirty blond hair would suggest a color; i.e., dirty blond. But what if the reader
doesnt know the rules of grammar as well as the writer? For that reason,
appropriate procedure would be to create a compound word; e.g., dirty-blond hair
or in-your-face, grammar instruction. (Adverbs ending in ly generally are not
hyphenated, because an ly ending makes a words adverb status obvious.)
Note proper procedure when two hyphenated words use the same base word; e.g.,
entry- to mid-level staff. Note that the hyphen after entry is followed by a space.
25.
Don't Use the Verb To Be So Much

Overreliance on the verb to be (is, am, are, were, and so on) can deaden your
writing. Verbs are supposed to be action words. Try to write without the verb to
be, substituting something else in each case. (I also cover this issue in item no. 16,
Avoid Expletives.) For example, you could convert I was happy with the grade I
got. to The grade I received delighted me.
26.
Maintain Parallel Construction in Lists

Listing is far more difficult than it seems, unless you know the basics. One of the
basics is to maintain parallel construction. Consider this example:
Once he completed grading all the papers, John: jumped for joy, sang
three songs, and quaffed a tall glass of red wine.
As insipid as the example may be, you will note that each listed item has a verb in
it, and, as such, describes an action. Now consider the following example, from an
actual submission:
Task 2: Prepare a brief cover letter that will describe my assignment, its
goals, and request each recipient to respond.
Notice how the organization after prepare seems twisty and turny (to quote from
a five-year-old), thus losing parallelism. As could have been predicted, it seems
like a pronoun (the most dangerous of all types of words, in my judgment) is at
fault; i.e., the word its. Items one and three of the list are fine, because they
describe the cover letter. Item two, because of its, at first seems to describe the
cover letter, but then we realize it describes the assignment. Momentary confusion
occurs; it shouldn't. We could reword the sentence as:
Task 2: Prepare a brief cover letter that describes my assignment and its
goals, and requests each recipient to respond.
The rewording has eliminated confusion and restored parallelism. (Note that, for
purposes of brevity, we could have eliminated its goals, because one can assume
18

Version 11.1

that an assignment description would indicate the purpose of the effort. Likewise,
we could shorten each recipient to recipients, to derive:
Task 2: Prepare a brief cover letter that describes my assignment and
requests recipients to respond.
And speaking of brief, is brief really required? What do you think? I believe this
section is fairly brief. Do you believe it is?
Now, concluding the digression, a more common form of lost parallel
construction occurs when writers mix verb items with noun items. Example:
In order to achieve well, I will:
develop a first draft,
draft review with Curly, Larry, and Moe,
prepare a final draft (draft paper essential),
document issuance, review, consideration, and redrafting,
recirculation, review, etc., and
final report.
The first item in a list sets the tone. Assuming you want to keep the first item as
is, you should make all other items follow the verb (develop)/object (a first draft)
format. Accordingly, we could revise the list as follows to obtain parallel
construction:
In order to achieve well, I will:
develop a first draft,
review the draft with principals of the firm,
prepare a final draft (on draft paper),
issue the document for review,
consider comments received,
redraft and reissue the document, and
prepare and issue the final report.
27.
Apply Effective List Syntax

But I was taught to do it this way is the common How-could-I-possibly-makea-mistake response when a FOPP participant punctuates a list improperly or uses
improper capitalization. That kind of response usually means, Gee, I think that's
the way my fourth-grade teacher taught me to do it. I'm sure that teacher was a
marvelous human being, and I'm also sure that maybe you don't remember
everything he or she said. Here are some easy-to-follow suggestions for lists.
A simple list is one where each item consists of just a few words, and none of the
items has punctuation in it. Example:
19

Version 11.1

Project Manager Tucker Dowt: pulled his hair, rubbed his eyes, cried, and
fell asleep at his computer.
The list in this case is run-on no bullets or other item prefixes are used and I
have chosen to begin it with a colon. In my world, use of the colon is optional
when the list is both run-on and simple (i.e., list elements are separated by
commas). I decided to use the colon to advise you, Here comes a list.
You may have been taught, You don't need that colon when you separate list
items by commas, and you dont need a comma between the next-to-the-last list
item and the and or or that follows it. (That's the step-down rule; i.e., if you
separate by commas, delete the last comma, and, if you separate by semi-colons,
change the last semi-colon to a comma.) No matter how you do it, someone else
looking at your list may have been taught something different, and will assume
you are wrong. However, if you follow a consistent pattern, you will find it's
easier and, for the most part, others will begin to believe that maybe just maybe
you're right and they're wrong. The simplest method, I believe, is no step-down,
as shown below.
How would you prepare the simple list if it had to be (or you wanted it to be)
bulleted? A number of folks would use something like the following:
Project Manager Tucker Dowt:
Pulled his hair
Rubbed his eyes
Cried and
Fell asleep at his computer.
In preparing a bulleted list, simply imagine the list as a run-on sentence. As such,
the prior list would look like this:
Project Manager Tucker Dowt: Pulled his hair Rubbed his eyes Cried and
Fell asleep at his computer.
Clearly, that would be incorrect. Punctuation is needed to separate the listed
elements, and whats with the weird capitalization? Given that we are dealing
with a simple list, we could show it as a sentence like this:
Project Manager Tucker Dowt: pulled his hair, rubbed his eyes, cried, and
or like this:
20

Version 11.1

Project Manager Tucker Dowt pulled his hair, rubbed his eyes, cried, and
The colon would be mandatory were we to bullet or otherwise prefix list
elements, to result in:
Project Manager Tucker Dowt:
pulled his hair,
rubbed his eyes,
cried, and
What I call an intermediate list includes a comma and/or semi-colon in at least
one list element, making it wise to set off each element with a semi-colon rather
than a comma. Using bullets often makes the list easier to follow, but sometimes,
possibly because of space restrictions, you have to rely on a run-on format:
Poor Tucker had to:
follow every instruction, even those intended to confuse;
get the paper printed out in time to permit internal review;
have his mentor make insightful (yeah, sure) comments; and
go over the spelling two, three, or more times.
Realistically, the bulleted format makes the list so easy to follow, commas would
do instead of semi-colons, but then the rules start getting too complex. Simple =
comma. Intermediate = semi-colon, especially so because you might have to
convert to run-on later, and then look at what would happen if all you had were
commas:
Poor Tucker had to: follow every instruction, even those intended to
confuse, get the paper printed out in time to permit internal review, have
his mentor make insightful (yeah, sure) comments, and go over the
spelling two, three, or more times.
A complex list often has sentences intermingled with phrases, punctuation of
several types, and so on. In these cases, the simplest way of handling the list is
through bullets, with each bullet marking the beginning of a sentence or a list
inclusion that (rules of grammar be damned) is treated like a sentence, even
though it isn't one. As an example:
Tucker Dowt took the following steps to develop his report. He:
Obtained information on the most effective ways of developing a
questionnaire.
21

Version 11.1
28.

Referred to an encyclopedia. (He selected a hard-copy rather than

electronic version.)
Spoke with four principals, including two from his firm and one each
from two others.
Wrote everything he needed to in just six minutes. (Or was that
months?)
Consider Other List Issues

When introducing a list, you generally do not need to say as follows when
readers can see the listed elements follow. As such, My preferences are: is
better than My preferences are as follows:
When listing something like preferences, you may find it appropriate to indicate
how you selected the listing method; e.g., My choices are, alphabetically:.
If you list by preference, be precise; indicate if the list is in descending order
(most to least preferred, which is most common) or in ascending order. Overkill?
See item no. 8, Be More Precise. Why give someone a one-in-a-million shot of
using your own words against you when, by investing a half-second, you can
almost eliminate the possibility?
Should you highlight list elements by using bullets, numbers, letters, etc.? Usually
some type of indication is helpful to the reader, and it generally doesnt matter
what type of elements you use. However, if you intend to refer to listed elements
or choices, it may be most effective to say Choice no. 6 (ringing in the new
year), so you do not have to repeat the entire listing. Be wary of list elements that
contain numbers. For example:
My choices are, in descending order of preference:
1.
2.
3.
4.
topic no. 6,
topic no. 1,
topic no. 24, or
topic no 5.
In that situation, bullets would probably suffice anyway, because we introduced

the list with in descending order of preference. However, using numbers creates
an element of confusion. Accordingly, if a writer wants to use a belt-andsuspenders approach, the best choice might be:
My choices are, in descending order of preference:
a. topic no. 6,
b. topic no. 1,
c. topic no. 24, or
d. topic no 5.
22

Version 11.1

29.
Consider the Visual Component of Written Communication

How something looks on a page affects our response to it. Breaking up your copy
with bullets and subheads can often be a big help. Be aware, too, of the use of
indents and spacing to make things appear easier to read. Is it better to have fewer
pages but have those pages single-spaced and loaded with small type, or have
more pages with a larger typeface, more lead between the lines, bullets, and so
on? My preference is the latter, and I doubt Im alone. Let me also call your
attention to justifying your copy left and right. It makes things visually boring
and, more often than not, results in some awkward space between words in some
lines. My preference is flush left and ragged right.
30.
Use Correct Professional Terminology

Customers do not hire professionals for a job. Clients retain, engage, or
commission professionals for an assignment, project, or commission. Likewise,
professionals do not perform a scope of work. They perform, or implement, or
execute a scope of service. (Contractors do work; professionals perform services.)
A work product creates the impression that a professionals deliverable or
instrument of professional service is a product, thus potentially invoking product
(strict) liability, rather than professional liability, which is why product is also a
taboo word (see no. 3).
Field technician or engineering technician is not professional terminology, in my
judgment, because the term fails to indicate as it should that the tech
represents the professional in the field; that the professional is 100% responsible
and personally liable for everything the field representative says and does while
on a project site.
31.
Capitalize Properly
a. Proper Nouns
We capitalize (i.e., use an initial capital) for proper nouns like John or Los
Angeles. Some folks go way beyond that, by capitalizing words like Engineer,
Schedule, and so forth. If you do this because of some valid stylistic preference of
the firm, so be it (but I'd sure ask why the preference exists, just to learn). And be
certain to apply such weird capitalization consistently, so people are not confused
(and cannot claim to have been confused) because of inconsistency. In one report
I reviewed, the author referred to a group of cities known collectively as the
Northern Coast area. Two sentences later he changed it to the Northern Coast
Area, and in the paragraph after that, he changed it again, to northern Coast
area. A word to the wise: If you intend to employ weird capitalization, do a
separate proofreading sweep through which you check for nothing except
consistency in capitalization. (Also refer to no. 42, Be Consistent.)
b. Personnel Titles
23

Version 11.1

Be mindful that a persons title within an organization, when merged with the
persons name, usually is capitalized, but otherwise is not. Thus, we could have:
Program Manager John Bachner seems awfully full of himself.
The program manager, John Bachner, seems awfully full of himself.
John Bachner, program manager, seems awfully full of himself.
Likewise, Tom is a principal of the firm, not Principal, but it would be
correct to write Firm Principal Tom Jones.
c. For Purposes of Differentiation
Do not use initial caps to differentiate one type of something from another; e.g.,
do not use Engineer to mean the engineer of record, and engineer to mean some
other engineer. Problems can arise when one of the words is capitalized when it
shouldnt be, or when the other is lower-cased when it shouldnt be. At the very
least, use an acronym to differentiate, so that you could refer to the engineer of
record as the EOR or EoR.
Were aware of a firm that for many years used Site to refer to the site of a
project, and site to mean a nonproject site. Doing so is unwise. Again, an acronym
of some kind seems called for, where, for example, the 3.5-acre site of the new
Smith Capital Assets Building is referred to as the Smith CAB site; SCAB would
also be a possibility, although a somewhat unpleasant one.
d. Acronyms
We create acronyms by using partial capitalization (such as EoR, above) or all
caps (e.g., EOR) to signify that what weve created is an acronym (a symbol) and
not a word (like SCAB and not scab from the example in no. 31d, above).
Using capital letters to designate an acronym does not mean that the term
being symbolized must be capitalized; e.g., ESA is an acronym for
environmental site assessment, not Environmental Site Assessment. Accordingly:
Our firm conducts environmental site assessments (ESAs).
e. Publication Titles
When referring to a title (of a book, newspaper, magazine article, blog, ezine, et
al.), use initial caps for every word except articles (a, an, and the), conjunctions
(and, or, but, et al.), and prepositions (to, on, behind, etc.), unless the article,
preposition, or conjunction is the first word of the title. The alternative is to
capitalize the first letter of every word of the title, which tends to look weird. (If
you were taught that you dont capitalize little words like is, you were taught
wrong.) Important: Titles should be shown in an italic font or should be within
quotes (see no. 36, below). Generally speaking, more substantial works, like
24

Version 11.1

books, are italicized, but that does not mean italics would be incorrect to indicate
the title of a magazine or magazine article. When both a magazine and an article
are involved, or something similar, consider italicizing the more significant of the
two; e.g.:
Please refer to the Limitations section of our report, Subsurface Study
for the Beanstock High-Rise.
f. Academic Degrees
When referenced formally, the degree receives initial caps; e.g.:
George somehow earned a Bachelor of Science degree.
Otherwise, initial caps do not apply; e.g., He earned a bachelors degree or a
masters degree; I forget which.
32.
Replace Clichs and Archaisms

Technical professionals (among others) use any number of clichs without
thinking how meaningless, or confusing, or inexact they are...nor how they tend to
make a writer from Firm A sound identical to a writer from Firm B. Some
common clichs (and simple alternatives) are:
Enclosed please find (I enclose)
I am in receipt of (I have received)
Please do not hesitate to call (Please call me or send an e-mail)
Time is of the essence (I recognize that you need this by)
At your earliest convenience (I hope to hear from you by)
I often refer to clichs as archaisms, because the expressions are so old. I refer to
certain old and out-of-date words as archaisms if only because they are not
clichs. As examples:
amongst (among)
often times (often)
towards (toward)
33.
Go around Each (and Other Words That Have the Same Effect), He, She
25

Version 11.1

Each singularizes, and that can create a problem when the group referred to
comprises males and females. As an example of singularization, Each FOPP
enrollee participates in the seminar. Nonetheless, we'll commonly see
constructions that ignore this obviousness; e.g., Each of the FOPP participants is
supposed to bring their brain with them. The subject of the sentence is each
(participants is the object of the preposition of) and, as a consequence, their is
wrong. (I also discuss this in no. 17, Watch out for Pronouns.) The correct
sentence would then get us into awkwardness, given that we'd have Each of the
FOPP participants is supposed to bring his or her brain with him or her,
respectively. Aside from the fact that some folks may assume you cannot tell boys
from girls, the sentence just sounds bad. You could make it somewhat better by
eliminating the last five words, to derive ...is supposed to bring his or her brain.,
but that sounds awkward, too. Some people get around this through the construct
s/he when the nominative form is involved, but that truly is awful.
Is it possible that the language developed over a time when males dominated and
now it just cannot be fixed? No! The solution is simple: Pluralize. Get rid of each
which, more often than not, is unnecessary: FOPP participants are supposed to
bring their brains with them. (Some pedants may spend hours debating the issue
of brains vs. brain, saying that the singular makes it clear that each participant has
only one brain. But we have better things to do with our time.)
Note that each does not have to be present for this guidance to apply; e.g., instead
of writing, A professional needs to be mindful of their ethics. try Professionals
need to be mindful of their ethics.
34.
Indicate Possessives Properly

People seem to have a great deal of difficulty with possessive forms. To make a
singular noun possessive, one adds an apostrophe and then an s (e.g., the teams
role in the project), unless the word ends in an s. In the latter instance, one can
either add s or just an apostrophe; e.g., the losss magnitude or the loss'
magnitude.
When a plural possessive is involved, usually just an apostrophe is added to the
concluding s (e.g., the teams roles in the project or the losses magnitudes).
When the plural form does not end in an s, treat the word like a singular; e.g.,
gymnasias.
A simple general rule to follow is to add only an apostrophe if the word (singular
or plural) ends in s, and s if it doesn't end in s.
Watch out for pronouns, because they do not use apostrophes to connote
possessive; e.g., its is possessive; its is a contraction for it is, and its means
whoever wrote it needs to review a fifth-grade grammar text (its is not a real
word).
26

Version 11.1
35.

Understand Parentheses and Punctuate Properly When Using Them

A parenthetical statement is, in essence, an aside (remember Shakespearian
drama?) that you handle as though it were not there; e.g.:
John and his dog run fast.
John (and his dog) runs fast.
The same applies to punctuation:
John Doe, CEO of Doe/Raymey Associates, sang for sixpence.
John Doe (CEO of Doe/Raymey Associates) sang for sixpence.
Note that a sentence that begins inside parentheses will have the ending
punctuation inside, too. A sentence that begins outside parentheses has its
conclusion outside, too:
(John Doe sang for sixpence.)
John Doe was a sketch (if you call singing for sixpence funny).
36.
Punctuate Properly inside Quotes and outside

With a few relatively rare exceptions, commas and periods go inside quote marks,
and other forms of punctuation (semi-colons, for example) go outside.
37.
Use Single Quotes Properly

Use single quotes to indicate a quote within a quote; e.g.,
He said, She said, Buzz off.
Use double quotes when you are using a somewhat novel word for the first time
I call them fluffleduffels.
or are using a word to express irony
According to the expert, two plus two equal five.
Some people use single quotes for such applications, but I dont know why.
38.
Get e.g. and i.e. Right

The abbreviation e.g. stands for the Latin phrase exempli gratia; it means for
example. The abbreviation i.e. stands for the Latin phrase id est, meaning that
27

Version 11.1

is. For example and that is do not mean the same thing; i.e., get i.e. and e.g.
right.
39.
Realize That And and & Are Not the Same

Some folks incorporate an ampersand (&) in the name of a company. As you
know, an ampersand is a symbol for and. Please do not use it in your writing to
mean and. If you do, I will regard it as somewhat unprofessional, & get angry.
40.
Tell the Reader What Is, Not What Isnt

I dont feel thats necessary. Oh? Then what do you feel it is? Tall? Refined? I
wasnt upset. What were you? Nostalgic? Ill? I dont believe they are the same.
So what do you believe they are? Similar? Be conscious of common forms of
expression that seem to communicate information, but which, when analyzed, do
not. You can avoid misunderstanding by saying or writing things positively; e.g.,
In my judgment, thats unnecessary., I took the news calmly., and I believe the two
are significantly different.
41.
Enhance Your Correspondence Style

a. Salutation
In conventional correspondence, people usually write Dear Name followed by
a colon (in business) or a comma when the letter is more personal (like a
thank-you letter). For whatever reason, when people correspond by e-mail or
fax, some folks just use a persons name; e.g., John, and then hurry on with
the message. Because many people regard Dear as a strange way to begin an
e-mail, and because Tom, Dick, or Harriet seems brusque and unfriendly, try
Hi, Tom., or Greetings, Dick., or Good morning, Harriet., instead. You can
also dispense with a salutation and integrate the individuals name in an
opening line; e.g., I enjoyed speaking with you, Tom. or Congratulations,
Dick. I heard about your. or As usual, Harriet, you hit the nail on the head
when you. The same would apply to a fax cover sheet, although the
conventional Dear Name approach works okay, too.
b. Attention and Salutation
In business-to-business correspondence, from a legal perspective, your
organization (via you as its representative) is writing to another organization.
Because you are writing to a known entity who represents the other
organization, you have your organization-to-organization correspondence sent
to the attention of that known entity. Accordingly, if you were writing to the
General Widget Corporation, to the attention of its vice president, John Doe,
you would set up like this:
General Widget Corporation
1234 Main Street
Widgetville, NE 12345-6789
28

Version 11.1

Attn.: John Doe, Vice President

Dear Mr. Doe:
You would not write Ladies and Gentlemen:, Dear Ladies and Gentlemen:, or
Dear Sirs: unless you knew Mr. Doe to have severe multiple personality
disorder.
c. The Letter Is Not from You
Given whats directly above, whom is your letter from? You or the
organization you represent? Obviously, its the organization you represent,
and failing to make that crystal-clear exposes you to personal liability.
(Admittedly, its a teeny, tiny exposure, but why create it at all?) When
closing a business letter, try:
Sincerely,
So & So Associates
Thomas A. Gogo
Associate
d. Attach, Append, Enclose
The issue here is precise language. No matter what Bill Gates and other
language-batterers would have you believe, you cannot attach by e-mail. The
pervasiveness of the usage (like ugh logon instead of log on) causes one to
say, Im not going to fight city hall on this one. Still, append or, possibly,
embed is better (in my judgment), because you cannot attach anything to
anything in cyberspace, nor can you attach when it comes out of the
recipients printer; only the recipient can attach. The same applies when you
send something by fax; you can append, but you cannot attach. You could,
however, attach, using the quote marks to indicate you are using a word
that doesnt really mean what it says. Note, too, that you cannot enclose things
via e-mail or fax, because theres nothing to enclose it in. But you could
enclose. Nitpicking pettifoggery? Perhaps. But I prefer to think of it as
being (or becoming) extremely sensitized to the accuracy of the words one
selects, because professionals are supposed to be precise. Remember, a
plaintiffs attorney might allege or imply that, because you were not precise in
your language, you probably were not precise when it came to your
calculations. By contrast, the obvious precision of a professional has actually
discouraged claims from being filed.
e. Letterhead
29

Version 11.1

If you are providing a covering letter of some type, use letterhead. If you do
not, I will assume that you do not hold me in high enough esteem; that you
use letterhead only for the good client representatives.
f. Transmittal Sheet
A preprinted, fill-in-the-boxes transmittal sheet says to me, We like treating
our client representatives like numbers rather than people. Its so much easier
to put checkmarks in boxes than it is to use some type of personal greeting. If
you feel compelled to use such a transmittal sheet, then be certain to use the
Remarks box to handwrite something that conveys personality; that shows
me what is written was prepared by a person and not a robot.
42.
Be Consistent
If you do something debatable or wrong consistently, you at least convey an
image of being careful to do it the same way. The it could be a manner of
punctuation, capitalization, or whatever. However, when you capitalize, say,
Consultant in one sentence, but then write consultant in another, your
inconsistency reflects a lack of understanding, a lack of quality control, and an
attitude that could be inferred to be, I just dont care.
43.
Warn Readers When a Document Is a Draft

When you are submitting a draft, such as the second report submission, be sure to
mark it DRAFT and define what that means, or provide an advisory in that
respect; e.g.:
DO NOT RELY ON THIS DOCUMENT.
DRAFT
FOR REVIEW ONLY.

NOT FOR DISTRIBUTION OR ATTRIBUTION.
44.
Abbreviate Dates So Your Intent Is Unmistakable

The date 2/1/08 means February 1, 2008 to many people. It also means January 2,
2008 to many people. No one could confuse Feb/1/08 for January 2, 2008. Given
that people commonly say Friday when they mean Saturday and February 1
when they mean February 2, you will find that also specifying the day of the
week (Fri, Feb/1/08) comprises what could be an important quality assurance
procedure. (If you so specify without checking a calendar, and youre wrong,
theres a far better likelihood that the reader(s) will catch the mistake.)
45.
Dont Add a List-Ender When Exemplifying
30

Version 11.1

When preparing a short list of examples, do not end the list with etc., et al., and so
on, or other words to that effect, because doing so defeats the purpose of having
examples. Consider the following sentence, for example:
Refer to letters of the alphabet, such as A, B, C, and so on.
By using and so on, I perverted the meaning of such as, making it equal all the
choices, not just a few example choices, because and so on is inclusive and thus
refers to the letters D-Z. The correct approach would be to write,
Refer to letters of the alphabet, such as A, B, and C.
and in that way provide examples only. I could also write,
Refer to letters of the alphabet; i.e., A, B, C, et al.
which would be acceptable because i.e. means that is, not for example; see
no. 38, Get e.g. and i.e. Right.
31

Inprove Writing

Caricato da

Informazioni sul documento

Copyright

Formati disponibili

Condividi questo documento

Condividi o incorpora il documento

Opzioni di condivisione

Hai trovato utile questo documento?

Questo contenuto è inappropriato?

Copyright:

Formati disponibili

Inprove Writing

Caricato da

Copyright:

Formati disponibili

Version 11.

Improve Your Writing Skills

Improve Your Writing Skills

Copyright 2013. All rights reserved.

Consider Other List Issues

Improve Your Writing Skills

Copyright 2013. All rights reserved.

Improve Your Writing Skills

Copyright 2013. All rights reserved.

Avoid Taboo Words, Including Absolutes

Check Your Spelling

Improve Your Writing Skills

Copyright 2013. All rights reserved.

Beware of Hazardous Homophones

Correct Accidental Words

Eliminate Slipshod Synonyms

Improve Your Writing Skills

Copyright 2013. All rights reserved.

Recognize, too, that, while a topic is part of a research assignment description, a

Improve Your Writing Skills

Copyright 2013. All rights reserved.

My FOPP Class 12 research project choices are, in descending order of

Change Words That Have Two (or More) Meanings

Improve Your Writing Skills

Copyright 2013. All rights reserved.

Change Subjective Modifiers

Delete Useless Words

Improve Your Writing Skills

Copyright 2013. All rights reserved.

Simplify Your Language

Improve Your Writing Skills

Copyright 2013. All rights reserved.

Make Subject and Verb Agree

I are happy to see you.

I am happy to see you.

Improve Your Writing Skills

Copyright 2013. All rights reserved.

or, in the case of intransitive verbs,

Improve Your Writing Skills

Copyright 2013. All rights reserved.

Improve Your Writing Skills

Copyright 2013. All rights reserved.

Watch out for Pronouns

Improve Your Writing Skills

Copyright 2013. All rights reserved.

The alternative to the foregoing He was unhappy would leave it unclear as to

Indicate Numbers Properly

Improve Your Writing Skills

Copyright 2013. All rights reserved.

For purposes of consistency, numbers modifying the same measure should be in

Improve Your Writing Skills

Copyright 2013. All rights reserved.

Another modification might be:

Reorganize To Help Eliminate Confusion

Shorter Sentences Are Best

Improve Your Writing Skills

Copyright 2013. All rights reserved.

I completed my review of ASFEs assignment compendium and

Manage Multiple Modifiers

Improve Your Writing Skills

Copyright 2013. All rights reserved.

Don't Use the Verb To Be So Much

Maintain Parallel Construction in Lists

Improve Your Writing Skills