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MY FATHERS TRAGEDY

My Father's Tragedy It was one of those lean years of our lives. Our rice field
was destroyed by locusts that came from the neighboring towns. When the locusts
were gone, we planted string beans but a fire burned the whole plantation. My
brothers went away because they got tired working for nothing. Mother and my
sisters went from house to house, asking for something to do, but every family was
plagued with some kind of disaster. The children walked in the streets looking for the
fruit that fell to the ground from the acacia tree. The men hung on the fence around
the market and watched the meat dealers hungrily. We were all suffering from lack of
proper food.
But the professional gamblers had money. They sat in the fish house at the station
and gave their orders aloud. The loafers and other bystanders watched them eat
boiled rice and fried fish with silver spoons. They never used forks because the
prongs stuck between their teeth. They always cut their lips and tongues with the
knives, so they never asked for them If the waiter was new and he put the knives on
the table, they looked at each other furtively and slipped them into their pockets.
They washed their hands in one big wooden bowl of water and wiped their mouths
with the leaves of the arbour trees that fell on the ground.
The rainy season was approaching. There were rumors of famine. The grass did not
grow and our carabao became thin. Father's fighting cock, Burick, was practically the
only healthy thing in our household. Its father, Kanaway, had won a house for us
some three years before, and Father had commanded me to give it the choicest rice.
He took the soft-boiled eggs from the plate of my sister Marcela, who was sick with
meningitis that year. He was preparing Burick for something big, but the great
catastrophe came to our town. The peasants and most of the rich men spent their
money on food. They had stopped going to the cockpit for fear of temptation; if they
went atall, they just sat in the gallery and shouted at the top of their lungs. They went
home with their heads down, thinking of the money they would have won.
It was during this impasse that Father sat every day in our backyard with his fighting
cock. He would not go anywhere. He would do anything. He just sat there caressing

Burick and exercising his legs . He sapt at his hackles and rubbed them,, looking far
away with a big dream. When Mother came home with some food, he went to the
granary and sat there till evening. Sometimes, he slept there with Burick, but at
dawn the cock woke him up with its majestic crowing. He crept into the house and
fumbled for the cold rice in the pot under the stove. Then, he put the cock in the pen
and slept on the bench all day.
Mother was very patient. But the day came when she kicked him off the bench. He
fell on the floor face down, looked up at her, and then resumed his sleep. Mother
took my sister Francisca with her. They went from house to house in the
neighbourhood, pounding rice for some people and hauling drinking water for others.
They came home with their share in a big basket that Mother carried on her head.
Father wasstill sleeping on the bench when they arrived. Mother told my sister to
cook some of the rice. She dipped a cup in the jar and splashed the cold water on
Father's face. He jumped up, looked at Mother with anger, and went to Burick's pen.
He gathered the cock in his arms and went down the porch. He sat on a log in the
backyard and started caressing his fighting cock.
Mother went on with her washing. Francisca fed Marcela with some boiled rice.
Father was still caressing Burick. Mother was mad at him.
"Is that all you can do?" she shouted at him.
"Why do you say that to me?" Father said. "I'm thinking of some ways to become
rich."
Mother threw a piece of wood at the cock. Father saw her in time. He ducked and
covered the cock with his body. The wood struck him. It cut a hole at the base of his
head. He got up and examined Burick. He acted as though the cock were the one
that was hurt. He looked up at Mother and his face was pitiful.
"Why don't you see what you are doing?" he said, hugging Burick.
"I would like to wring that cock's neck," mother said.
"That's his fortune," I said.
Mother looked sharply at me. "Shut up, idiot!" she said. "You are becoming more like
your father every day."
I watched her eyes move foolishly. I thought she would cry. She tucked her skirt

between her legs and went on with her work. I ran down the ladder and went to the
granary, where Father was treating the wound on his head. I held the cock for him.
"Take good care of it, son," he said.
"Yes, Sir," I said.
"Go to the river and exercise its legs. Come back right away. We are going to town."
I ran down the street with the cock. avoiding the pigs and dogs that came in my way.
I plunged into the water in my clothes and swam with Burick. I put some water in my
mouth and blew it into his face. I ran back to our house slapping the water off my
clothes. Father and I went to the cockpit.
It was Sunday, but there were many loafers an gamblers at the place. There were
peasants and teachers. There was a strange man who had a black fighting cock. He
had come from one of the neighboring towns to seek his fortune in our cockpit.
His name was Burcio. He held our cock above his head and closed one eye, looking
sharply at Burick's eyes. He put it on the ground and bent over it, pressing down the
cock's back with his hands. Burcio was testing Burick's strength. The loafers and
gamblers formed a ring around the, watching Burcio's deft hands expertly moving
around Burick.
Father also tested the cock of Burcio. He threw it in the air and watched it glide
smoothly to the ground. He sparred with it. The black cock pecked at his legs and
stopped to crow proudly for the bystanders. Father picked it up an spread its wings,
feeling the tough hide beneath the feathers.
The bystanders knew that a fight was about to be matched. They counted the money
in their pockets without showing it to their neighbours.They felt the edges of the
coins with amazing swiftness and accuracy. Only a highly magnified amplifier could
have recorded the tiny clink of the coins that fell between deft fingers. The caressing
rustle of the paper money was inaudible. The peasants broke from the ring and hid
behind the coconut trees. They unfolded their handkerchiefs and counted their

money. They rolled the paper money in their hands and returned to the crowd. They
waited for the final decision.
"Shall we make it this coming Sunday?" Burcio asked.
"It's too soon for my Burick," Father said. His hand moved mechanically into his
pocket. But it was empty. He looked around at his cronies.
But two of the peasants caught Father's arm and whispered something to him. They
slipped some money in his hand and pushed him toward Burcio. He tried to estimate
the amount of money in his hand by balling it hard. It was one of his many tricks with
money. He knew right away that he had some twenty-peso bills. A light of hope
appeared in his face.
"This coming Sunday's all right," he said.
All at once the men broke into wild confusion. Some went to Burcio with their money;
others went to Father. They were not bettors, but investors. Their money would back
up the cocks at the cockpit.
In the late afternoon the fight was arranged. We returned to our house with some
hope. Father put Burick in the pen and told me to go to the fish ponds across the
river. I ran down the road with mounting joy. I found a fish pond under a camachili
tree. It was the favourite haunt of snails and shrimps. Then I went home.
Mother was cooking something good. I smelled it the moment I entered the gate. I
rushed into the house and spilled some of the snails on the floor. Mother was at the
stove. She was stirring the ladle in the boiling pot. Father was still sleeping on the
bench. Francisca was feeding Marcela with hot soup. I put the snails and shrimps in
a pot and sat on the bench.

Mother was cooking chicken with some bitter melons. I sat wondering where she got
it. I knew that our poultry house in the village was empty. We had no poultry in town.
Father opened his eyes when he heard the bubbling pot.
Mother put the rice on a big wooden platter and set it on the table. She filled our
plates with chicken meat and ginger. Father got up suddenly and went to the table.
Francisca sat b the stove. Father was reaching for the white meat in the platter when
Mother slapped his hand away. he was saying grace. Then we put our legs under the
table and started eating.
It was our first taste of chicken in a long time. Father filled his plate twice and ate
very little rice. He usually ate more rice when we had only salted fish and some
leaves of trees. We ate "grass" most of the time. Father tilted his plate and took the
soup noisily, as though he were drinking wine. He put the empty chicken meat.
"It is good chicken," he said.
Mother was very quiet. She put the breast on a plate and told Francisca to give ti to
Marcela. She gave me some bitter melons. Father put his hand in the pot and fished
out a drumstick.
"Where did you get this lovely chicken?" he asked.
"Where do you think I got it" Mother said.
The drumstick fell from his mouth. It rolled into the space between the bamboo splits
and fell on the ground. Our dog snapped it up and ran away. Father's face broke in
great agony. He rushed outside the house. I could hear him running the toward the
highway. My sister continued eating, but my appetite was gone.
"What are you doing, Son?" Mother said. " Eat your chicken."

palms are sweaty knees weak arms are heavy, there's vomit on his sweater already,
moms spaghetti he's nervous but on the surface he looks calm and ready to drop
bombs but he keeps on forgetting what he wrote down the whole crowd rose so loud
he opens his mouth but the words dont come out hes choking how everybody joking
now clocks run out times up over plow! snap back to reality oh there goes gravity oh
there goes rabbit he chokes he so mad but he wont give up that easy no he wont
have it he knows...........................blah blah. its a long song. look it up. im a 14 year
old girl and ik this!! c'mon!
Look, if you had one shot, or one opportunity
To seize everything you ever wanted-One moment
Would you capture it or just let it slip?
His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy
There's vomit on his sweater already, mom's spaghetti
He's nervous, but on the surface he looks calm and ready to drop bombs,
but he keeps on forgettin what he wrote down,
the whole crowd goes so loud
He opens his mouth, but the words won't come out
He's choking now, everybody's joking now
The clock's run out, time's up over, bloah!
Snap back to reality, Oh there goes gravity
Oh, there goes Rabbit, he choked
He's so mad, but he won't give up that
Easy, no
He won't have it , he knows his whole back's to these ropes
It don't matter, he's dope
He knows that, but he's broke
He's so stagnant that he knows
When he goes back to his mobile home, that's when it's
Back to the lab again yo
This this whole rhapsody

He better go capture this moment and hope it don't pass him


[Hook:]
You better lose yourself in the music, the moment
You own it, you better never let it go
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo
The soul's escaping, through this hole that it's gaping
This world is mine for the taking
Make me king, as we move toward a, new world order
A normal life is boring, but superstardom's close to post mortem
It only grows harder, only grows hotter
He blows us all over these hoes is all on him
Coast to coast shows, he's know as the globetrotter
Lonely roads, God only knows
He's grown farther from home, he's no father
He goes home and barely knows his own daughter
But hold your nose 'cause here goes the cold water
His hoes don't want him no more, he's cold product
They moved on to the next schmoe who flows
He nose dove and sold nada
So the soap opera is told and unfolds
I suppose it's old partner but the beat goes on
Da da dum da dum da da
[Hook]
No more games, I'ma change what you call rage
Tear this motherfucking roof off like 2 dogs caged
I was playing in the beginning, the mood all changed

I been chewed up and spit out and booed off stage


But I kept rhyming and stepwritin the next cypher
Best believe somebody's paying the pied piper
All the pain inside amplified by the fact
That I can't get by with my 9 to 5
And I can't provide the right type of life for my family
Cause man, these goddam food stamps don't buy diapers
And it's no movie, there's no Mekhi Phifer, this is my life
And these times are so hard and it's getting even harder
Trying to feed and water my seed, plus
Teeter totter caught up between being a father and a prima donna
Baby mama drama's screaming on and
Too much for me to wanna
Stay in one spot, another day of monotony
Has gotten me to the point, I'm like a snail
I've got to formulate a plot or I end up in jail or shot
Success is my only motherf***ing option, failure's not
Mom, I love you, but this trailer's got to go
I cannot grow old in Salem's lot
So here I go is my shot.
Feet fail me not cause maybe the only opportunity that I got
[Hook]
You can do anything you set your mind to, man
ending of father's tradegy

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