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A Prayer Journal
By Flannery OConnor
Farrar, Straus and Giroux, 2013
$18.00
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swell my headunconsciously
even (23). OConnor believes
that her desire to be a fine writer
conflicts with her desire to serve
God. But she willingly accepts the
cross of writing for the glory of
God, should that prove to be her
cross to bear. Ultimately, OConnor
interprets her vocation as one
which will require great struggle
and mortification. She prays that
her work will be Gods work. Help
me to get what is more than natural
into my workhelp me to love &
bear with my work on that account.
If I have to sweat for it, dear God,
let it be as in Your service. I would
like to be intelligently holy (18).
The end of the prayer journal comes
as a bit of a shock. In her final entry,
OConnor writes:
My thoughts are so far away
from God. He might as well
not have made me. And the
feeling I egg up writing here
lasts approximately a half
and hour and seems a sham.
I dont want any of this
artificial superficial feeling
stimulated by the choir.
Today I have proved myself a
gluttonfor Scotch oatmeal
cookies and erotic thought.
There is nothing left to say of
me (40).
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