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The Humanistic Psychologist


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Being a Therapist: Contributions of


Heidegger's Philosophy and the Buddha's
Teachings to Psychotherapy
Belinda Siew Luan Khong

Macquarie University
Published online: 22 Aug 2013.

To cite this article: Belinda Siew Luan Khong (2013) Being a Therapist: Contributions of Heidegger's
Philosophy and the Buddha's Teachings to Psychotherapy, The Humanistic Psychologist, 41:3, 231-246
To link to this article: http://dx.doi.org/10.1080/08873267.2013.779908

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The Humanistic Psychologist, 41: 231246, 2013


Copyright # Division 32 (Humanistic Psychology) of the American Psychological Association
ISSN: 0887-3267 print/1547-3333 online
DOI: 10.1080/08873267.2013.779908

Being a Therapist
Contributions of Heideggers Philosophy
and the Buddhas Teachings to Psychotherapy

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Belinda Siew Luan Khong


Macquarie University
Is there a place for Heideggers philosophy and the Buddhas teachings (dhamma) in contemporary
psychotherapy? The simple answer is yes. This article explores how the ideas of Being-in-the-world,
Openness, Being-With, anticipatory care, letting be and letting go, cultivating a meditative attitude
and a beginners mindpromoted in Heideggers philosophy, daseinsanalysis, and the Buddhas
teachingsinform my approach to therapy and ground my Being as a therapist, and how this
embodiment has been received by clients. Some important parallels and differences between
Heideggerian and Buddhist ideas and practices are also discussed. Heideggers philosophy, the Buddhas teachings, and daseinsanalysis provide therapists with important foundations for understanding
their roles as cojourneyers with their clients, and embracing this attitude in therapy can make therapy
truly a healing, rather than a curing, process.

When I reflected on how Heideggers philosophy, daseinsanalysis, and the Buddhas teachings
(dhamma) have influenced my approach to therapy, it made me realize how important this influence has been on my lived world as a therapist. These three schools of thoughts have permeated
my Being as a practitioner in subtle ways.
A recent experience brought home the significance of this influence. I was supervising a
young psychologist, Alyssa,1 who was finding difficulty working with a client whom she
described as feeling stuck. Alyssa explained that the client presented with symptoms of high
anxiety and depression, but she sensed that this was because he was afraid to explore other ways
of relating to the world. I suggested that, rather than just meting out advice on how he could
manage his symptoms, she might like to just remain present with the client, and allow the client
himself to get in touch with his Being in the world. Although this suggestion of appeared to resonate with Alyssa, she explained that her difficulty was with knowing what to do with the
client. How to help him with his condition? Alyssas explanation highlights a common
dilemma experienced by many therapists todayconcerns about doing rather than being.
Psychotherapists today seem to be more concerned with how to be a therapist, rather than
with being a therapist. With this kind of attitude, symptoms, diagnosis, and intervention in a
1
For confidentiality purposes, the names and personal details of clients and individuals whose stories appeared in this
article have been changed.
Correspondence should be addressed to Belinda Siew Luan Khong, 67 Braeside Street, Wahroonga, NSW 2076,
Australia. E-mail: bkhong@belindakhong.com

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means-ends approach take precedence in therapy. In the process, clients may become objectified
in the sense that they are regarded as patients to be administered to, rather than as individuals
who have a deep appreciation of their own difficulties and experiences, and can actively engage
with the therapist in charting the course of their personal journeys. The focus of therapy becomes
more about curing, than about healing.
According to Yalom (2002), the flow of therapy should be spontaneous, forever following
unanticipated riverbeds; it is grotesquely distorted by being packaged into a formula that enables
inexperienced, inadequately trained therapists (or computers) to deliver a uniform course of therapy (p. 34). Unfortunately, with increasing demands for evidence-based practices, the use of
pharmacology as the preferred treatment for mental health issues, and the employment of technology in offering therapy, clients often come to therapy looking for solutions and cures, and
therapists tend to rely on evidence-based interventions to deliver them. In such an environment,
is there a role or a place for Heideggers philosophy and the Buddhas teachings in contemporary
psychotherapy? The simple answer is yes.
Many of Heideggers ideas and the Buddhas teachings have relevance for psychology and
psychotherapy. In this article, I focus on those concepts that are particularly salient to psychotherapy in relation to the Being of the therapist. Using my own experiences as a therapist and
clinical vignettes, I discuss the important ways that Heideggers philosophy, daseinsanalysis,
and the Buddhas teachings inform and ground my Being as a therapist. In this context, the
Heideggerian, Buddhist, and daseinsanalytic ideas of Being-in-the-world, Openness,
Being-with, anticipatory care, meditation, mindfulness practice, cultivating a meditative attitude
and a beginners mind, and letting be and letting go have enriched my engagement with clients.
The first section of the article explores the influence of Heideggerian and daseinsanalytic
ideas and practices on my Being-in-the world as a therapist. The second section deals with
the influence of the Buddhas teachings on this lived world.

INFLUENCE FROM HEIDEGGERS PHILOSOPHY AND DASEINSANALYSIS


Being a Therapist
In my view, being a therapist involves (a) my Being (with a capital B) as a therapist, the fact that
I am a human being, and my own humanityin short, myself as a person; and (b) my being
(with a small b) that is the stance and attitude that I take toward clients during therapy. During
therapy, practitioners are often concerned with techniques, skills, strategies, and professional
training, etc. However, being a therapist encompasses more than the therapeutic role that
psychologists assume. Being a therapist speaks more to the attitude that the therapist takes
toward clients, and the therapists understanding of what it means to be human. In short, being
a therapist is about how I relate to another human being, who in this case, happens to be a client,
rather than what I do with, or for, a particular client.
Condrau (1998), a well-known daseinsanalyst saw psychotherapy as an activity which
involves our fellow human beings, and our being with them as fellow human beings (p. 17).
According to Friedman (2008), an important element in therapy is healing through meeting,
that is, the healing that takes place in the betweenin the relationship between therapist and
client (p. 301). Hycner (as cited in Friedman, 2008) explained that this human meeting requires

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that the therapist first be a person available to others as a human being, and secondarily be a
professional trained in the appropriate methods of practicing psychotherapy (p. 312). I believe
that the Heideggerian concepts of Openness, Being-in-the-world, Being-with, and releasement
(Gelassenheit) or letting be can assist therapists with embodying this attitude.

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Openness
Heidegger (1927=1962) employed the German term, Da-sein, to convey the idea of human existence as an openness. Da (there) and sein (being) point to the open, worldly nature of human
beings (Craig, 1988). To Heidegger, the ontological or existential characteristic of Da-sein is disclosedness or illumination. By illumination, Heidegger meant that human existence is an openness, a clearing (lichtung) into which other beings and things can come forth and show
themselves (Boss, 1963).
Many of Heideggers ideas provided the philosophical foundation for daseinsanalysis, an
existential approach to therapy developed by the Swiss psychiatrist, Medard Boss. The concept
of Da-sein as a clearing has been used by Boss (1979) as the ontological foundation for freedom
and responsibility in daseinsanalysis. For Boss, the capacity for Da-sein to serve as the openness
in which things can be encountered and responded to means that each Da-sein has the freedom
and the responsibility to choose from a range of possibilities.
How has this understanding of human existence as openness influenced my being a therapist?
It is important to note that I an not talking about two opennessesthat of the therapist and the
other of the clientin which case, we would fall into thinking along the lines of the subject
object dichotomy, inner and outer, subjective and objective. Heideggers concept of openness
points to the therapistclient relationship itself as the openness or clearing in which the Being
(the openness) of the therapist and the Being of the client encounter each other.
Many renowned psychotherapists have described the openness of the therapeutic relationship
in various terms. Friedman (2008) described this space as the interhuman . . . an ontological
dimension in the meeting between two persons (p. 300). Condrau (1998) saw it as the intersubjective human openness to the world (p. 55). Yalom (2002) referred to this openness as the
here and now, that is what is happening here (in this office, in this relationship, in the
in-betweeness-the space between me and you) and now in this immediate hour (p. 46).
From a daseinsanalytic perspective, there is no separation between therapist and client, as
each needs the others openness in order to be. According to Boss (1963), this mutual openness
constitutes the therapistclient relationship, and affords the place described by Freud (1914) as a
playground (p. 154) wherein all the clients possibilities for relating can freely come out in the
open. The following clinical vignette illustrates how the Heideggerian concept of openness has
informed my engagement with clients, and how they experienced it.
Maryannes Story
Maryanne, an articulate professional in her late 40 s, presented with symptoms of high anxiety
and stress. Although outwardly confident, Maryanne had issues with self-esteem and ongoing
relationship difficulties with her sister. Many of our sessions were focused on her feelings of
anger and resentment about the way her sister interacted with her, and the stress of being joint

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carers for her mother, who was in the early stage of dementia. In one of our sessions, Maryanne
related how her sister had been ignoring her e-mails and phone calls. As she recited her sisters
list of wrong doings, Maryanne become more and more agitated. I reflected back her feelings of
frustration and annoyance, and casually made the observation that her sister, who travelled
frequently, may not have had the time to get back to her.
To my surprise, this comment seemed to trigger enormous rage in Maryanne. She threatened
to terminate counselling, and then started to throw her handbag, first at the table, and then at the
walls of the therapy room. I took the approach of letting Maryanne act out her rage, and offered
her the use of my meditation cushion, instead of her handbag, to throw around. After 10 minutes
of this rampage, Maryanne quietened down, sat back in her chair, and asked me for my thoughts.
She was also concerned whether I might terminate counselling with her because of her behavior.
I shared with her my feelings of surprise and annoyance at her behavior, which seemed to be
out of proportion to my casual remark, and suggested that our relationship warranted more
respect than what she had meted out so far. I also ventured the observation that if I, as a trained
professional, had such reactions to her behavior, I wondered whether her sister, who is untrained,
may have had even more difficulty in dealing with her and was avoiding her. I assured her, however, that I had no intention of ending our relationship, and regarded her actions as a way for me
to understand her better.
The second surprise of the therapeutic hour was that Maryanne started to cry. She said that no
one had cared enough previously to stand up to her, and to communicate how they felt about
being on the receiving end of her actionsthey merely avoided her as her sister did. She also
added that no one had cared enough to say that they would stay around when she misbehaved,
and that my commitment to her well-being had touched her deeply. This session proved to be a
turning point in her therapy. Maryanne gained profound insights into her anger and rage, which
appeared to be related to her underlying feelings of a lack of concern, and the fear of abandonment by significant people in her life. We were able to explore these insights at length in
follow-up sessions.
The approach I took in being honest with Maryanne about my feelings was informed by the
daseinsanalytic approachthat in the openness of the therapeutic relationship, everything is
allowed to come forth, and be responded to. In this context, Yaloms (2002) advice on being
a therapist is instructive. He suggested that therapists use the information gained in the here
and now to pay attention to their immediate feelings and to talk about how the therapist feels,
rather than what the client is doing. Meeting Maryanne as a fellow human being, and being able
to communicate my feelings to her as a person, rather than as a therapist, has allowed us to
respond authentically to what was unfolding within our relationship.

Being-in-the-World and Being-With


In addition to its fundamental characteristic as openness, Daseins other ontological characteristic is as Being-in-the-world (Heidegger, 1927=1962, p. 78). This compound expression is
intended to emphasize the unity of human beings and world. In Being and Time (1927=
1962), Heidegger conceives of Da-sein as a movement (p. 427) in that it lives out its existence
temporarily and is actively engaged with the world. According to Guignon (1983), the idea of
human existence as an ongoing process is what Heidegger sought to capture in the use of the

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term Being-in-the-world. In this sense, Heideggers notion of human existence as a process parallels the Buddhist view that everything is in a continual state of flux, constantly evolving and
transforming.
The equiprimordial characteristics of Being-in, in-the-world, and Being-with constitute the existential characteristic of Being-in-the-world. In this article, I focus on the aspect of Being-with.
According to Heidegger (1927=1962), human beings are being-with-others (p. 155), meaning that, ontologically, people are social beings, and that this characteristic of being-with provides the condition for the possibility of human relationships, whether of love, indifference, or
care. As Heidegger (1927=1962) explained:
Daseins Being is Being-with, its understanding of Being already implies the understanding of
Others. This understanding like any understanding, is not an acquaintance derived from knowledge
about them, but a primordially existential kind of Being, which, more than anything else, make such
knowledge and acquaintance possible. (p. 35)

Boss (1963) regarded this human attribute as providing the basis for therapy. Although daseinsanalysts accept that each individual occupies a unique world, the human characteristic of beingtogether implies that each individual possesses an immediate understanding of the other (Moss,
1978). According to Boss (1965), this means that the therapist can relate to the client directly,
not because of any hypothetical empathy, but by virtue of the fact that the therapist is able to see
everything that happens to the client as stemming from the same origin as the therapists existence. As such, the therapist can be totally open and accepting of the client, as there is no longer
any barrier between an I and a Thou (Boss, 1965, p. 191). On a similar note, Davis (2000)
explained that this understanding of the other is possible without knowing what is like to be
the other, and that this is because the understanding is ontological (p. 36).
In therapy, I found this idea of Being-with helpful when working with clients. For example,
when my clients experience anxiety, anger, frustration, etc., or are unable to express their feelings, I have an immediate human-to-human understanding of these emotions. This understanding arises not because I can empathize with the client, but because, as another human being, I
have a shared sense of what the client is experiencing, even though I may not yet know why he
or she is feeling that way. With this shared human understanding, it is possible within the therapeutic relationship for me to provide the openness for the client to become aware of how he or
she had chosen one way of existing over another, and to cultivate other ways of relating to the
world. This way of Being-with the client is especially helpful, when accompanied by the
therapist adopting an attitude of releasement (Gelassenheit) or letting be.
Meditative Thinking, Releasement and Letting Be
In his later thinking and writing, Heidegger (1959=1966) promoted the ideas of meditative thinking and releasement (Gelassenheit) to complement his conception of authenticity. Heidegger
(1941=1993) saw meditative thinking as an antidote to the technological attitude (p. 15).
The technological attitude, Heidegger explained, refers to the way in which human beings perceive everything as standing reserve (p. 17) to be appropriated and used in the service of
something else. Heidegger (1959=1966) believed that the technological approach has given rise
to calculative thinking (p. 24), the kind of attitude that computes things in terms of

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means-ends. In contrast, meditative thinking is characterized by its nonattachment to specific


ideas or a certain way of understanding things (Heidegger, 1959=1966). As I show later, the
Heideggerian notion of meditative thinking has striking similarities with the meditative attitude
enunciated by the Buddha.
In addition to meditative thinking, Heidegger (1959=1966) encouraged people to adopt an
attitude of releasement towards things (p. 55). Releasement, according to Heidegger
(1959=1966), involves an attitude of non-willing (p. 59); that is, cultivating a meditative attitude of just waiting. Heidegger believed that meditative thinking and releasement grant us the
possibility of dwelling in the world in a different way that is by letting-be (p. 61). However,
letting be in this sense does not imply inactivity or indifference, but permitting things to unfold
naturally. A released person is not inactive, as releasement towards things and openness to the
mystery never happen of themselves. . . . Both flourish only through persistent, courageous
thinking (Heidegger, 1959=1966, p. 56, italics added).
Heidegger further explained that in waiting, a person becomes more void, more empty, but
richer in possibilities (Zimmerman, 1986). The difference lies in that, instead of categorizing
and subjecting things to our will, we let them be as what they already are. In short, for Heidegger, releasement involves both action and nonaction depending on the particular situation. In this
respect, as I show later, there are significant parallels and differences between the Heideggerian
notions of releasement and letting be, and the Buddhist concept of letting go.
In daseinsanalysis, practitioners are encouraged to adopt this attitude of releasement or letting
be toward their patients. As Hoch, a Swiss daseinsanalyst explained, this attitude involves the
therapist being there for the patient and trusting that what is potentially in the patient will unfold,
if the appropriate spiritual and emotional atmosphere is provided (personal communication,
April 11, 1997). By adopting an open attitude toward the patients experiences, the analyst is
sensitized to the obstacles that are limiting the persons admission of behavior that had been
previously avoided (Boss, 1963). According to Boss (1963), maintaining an open attitude is
in line with the therapist providing, what has been described in daseinsanalysis as anticipatory
care (p. 72).

Intervening and Anticipatory Care


In our interactions with human beings, Heidegger (1927=1962) differentiated between two modes
of care, or solicitude (Fursorge; p. 157). He cautioned against a mode of solicitude, which is
similar to our dealing with objects. In this mode, one person leaps in and takes over for the other;
in authentic solicitude, the person leaps ahead (p. 158) of the other person and helps him or her to
uncover existential possibilities. According to Heidegger (1927=1962) such solicitude assists the
person to become transparent to himself in his care and to become free for it (p.158).
Boss incorporated Heideggers idea of solicitude in daseinsanalysis, describing the mode of
leaping in as intervening care, and the mode of leaping ahead as anticipatory care (Boss,
1963, p. 72). Following Heidegger, intervening care is discouraged in daseinsanalysis. Condrau
(1995) described this type of care as a kind of repair work (p. 199) where the therapist often
metes out advice, instructions, and medication. Condrau acknowledged that although intervening
care is appropriate at times, it should be minimized, as it could result in reducing the clients
sense of responsibility and increasing his or her dependency on the therapist.

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Anticipatory care, which is encouraged in daseinsanalysis, permits the therapist and client to
encounter each other as fellow human beings and is founded on the premise that human beings
are Being-with. Clients are facilitated to deal with their own impairments and difficulties and to
choose their own course of action (Condrau, 1988). Boss (1963) explained that this concern is
not a concern for a particular item in the persons life, but for his or her whole existence.
The following clinical vignette illustrates how the Heideggerian, and daseinanalytic ideas of
being open, being with, letting be, and anticipatory care informs my Being as a therapist, and my
being a therapist with clients.
Oscars Story
Oscar, a divorced man in his late 50 s had experienced a number of depressive episodes. He was
referred to me by his psychiatrist, for counselling while taking anti-depression medication. In
therapy, Oscar was polite and self-effacing, but tended to hold himself back when discussing
relationship difficulties with his son, who was unemployed and still living at home. Oscar got
upset at having to support him financially, However, he felt that he had no choice, pointing
out that his sons emotional problems probably resulted from Oscars acrimonious divorce from
his wife. During such interactions, his guilt prevented him from sharing his real feelings with his
son, and he would withdraw from engaging with him in a meaningful way. These arguments
often ended in Oscar feeling depressed, although he attributed his depression to work-related
stress. During our discussions on his relationship difficulties, I sensed his holding back his feelings of anger and frustration, and his hesitation in acknowledging them to himself, and to me.
During one therapy session, Oscar described an argument with his son, and asked me for
advice on how to deal with the situation. I did not offer any, and instead said,
Oscar, we have discussed similar issues a number of times. I sense that you have insights into the
nature of these problems, and have an idea of how to deal with them. Why dont you try dealing
with them yourself?

My intention here was to try to emulate, in an open, caring environment, a situation that parallels
his interactions with his son. I envisaged that by letting Oscars feelings be, and allowing them to
unfold spontaneously, Oscar might experience for himself the feelings that he had previously
denied or had been unable to admit to, and to cultivate other ways of being. In a similar vein,
Yalom (2002), noted that a good strategy in therapy is to find a here-and-now equivalent of the
dysfunctional interaction as this equivalent will provide greater immediacy and accuracy for the
client (p. 52).
Oscar became very angry at my suggestion to try to solve the problems himself. Initially, he
withdrew from further interaction, and kept silent. Later he burst out angrily,
What do you think that I am paying you for? I would not be seeing you if I knew what to do. I dont
feel that I am getting much value from our session today. It is like the situation with my son. I support him financially, but get no help from him in return. I feel frustrated and annoyed that the
relationship with my son is so one-sided. I think that my feeling of guilt has contributed to his
not taking responsibility for his life.

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I replied that I was glad that my comments had made him angry and allowed him to get in
touch with his anger and frustration, and that he was able to express his feelings instead of
internalizing them. I shared with him that I felt closer to him in these moments because he
was relating to me authentically. To my surprise, Oscar laughed, and explained that he found
it funny that I had tried to get him to express his anger, which he had found it hard to do.
He said that he appreciated my facilitating him to experience his restricted way of being in
the world, and afforded him another way of relating to his son.
After this session, which turned out to be a watershed for Oscar, he was able to share his real
feelings with his son, and together they found ways for his son to find some gainful employment
and to work on their fatherson relationship. Oscars depression subsequently subsided, and he
was able to stop taking medication. In our last session together, Oscar disclosed that he found
my attempt at trying to make him angry amusing, as he was not aware of his underlying feelings
of resentment, frustration, and anger. He added that he appreciated my understanding his real
feelings and that letting him be assisted him in getting in touch with these feelings experientially.
It would appear that the anticipatory care that I provided to Oscar was more powerful than any
intervening care that I could have given him by intellectually analyzing his situation with his
son, and advising him how to deal with it.

INFLUENCE FROM THE BUDDHAS TEACHINGS


Being a Therapist
In the earlier sections, I discussed how various Heideggerian and daseinsanalytic ideas and practices inform and ground my Being as a therapist. In this section I discuss the influence from the
Buddhas teachings. As in the case with Heideggers philosophy, the Buddhas teachings are not
only applicable to therapists, but to all human beings and human existence. However, in the case
of therapists, where a large part of our work involves listening, attending, and responding, the
Buddhas teachings on meditation, mindfulness, quiet listening, and letting go are particularly
relevant.

Meditation and Mindfulness Practice


Elsewhere (Khong, 2004, 2007, 2009, 2011), I have written extensively about the practice of
meditation and mindfulness, and the benefits to clients. In this article, I focus on how the Buddhas teaching on meditation and mindfulness practices can enhance a practitioners Being as a
therapist.
The Buddha recommends two types of meditation, namely tranquility (samatha) and insight
(vipassana) meditation. The latter is commonly referred to as mindfulness practice. Briefly, tranquility or concentration meditation involves sustaining attention on one object, such as the
breath, a mantra, a candle, etc., to the exclusion of other stimuli, allowing the mind to settle
down. As Kabat-Zinn (1994) explained, with continuous practice, the mind becomes better able
to stay on the object of focus, and to notice the earliest impulse to become distracted by
something else (p. 72).

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Although the Buddha recommends tranquility meditation as a way of calming and stabilizing
the mind, he emphasizes the importance of insight meditation or mindfulness practice as a way
for individuals to get to in touch with and understand the nature and workings of their own
minds. Gunaratana (1991) explained that mindfulness involves the ability to see things as they
really are . . . to give bare attention and just looking at whatever comes up in the mind, or in each
situation as it occurs (p. 148) without wishing to change or to attend to it. As one of my
clients put it, Mindfulness enables me to see myself operating in real time, rather than from
hindsight.
According to Nyanaponika (1992), mindfulness entails cultivating constant awareness to
what is actually happening to us and in us (p. 30) moment by moment. He noted that cultivating bare attention is not a simple task, as we normally infuse what we perceive with self-interest,
subjective judgments, and associative thinking. The task of bare attention, he added, is to eliminate all these extraneous accretions from the object proper.
Although mindfulness is historically a Buddhist practice, mindfulness can be considered a
universal human capacity proposed to foster clear thinking and open-heartedness (Ludwig &
Kabat-Zinn, 2008, p. 1350). As Rahula (1978) pointed out, meditation and mindfulness are
connected with the joys and sorrows of daily living, its activities, dilemmas, and intellectual
occupationsin short, being human.

The Mindful Therapist: Being Rather Than Doing


In a recent article entitled What are the Benefits of Mindfulness? Davis and Hayes (2012)
raised a number of points regarding the use of mindfulness by therapists. The authors noted that
(a) there is lack of literature on what a therapy session looks like when a therapist uses mindfulness and Buddhistoriented approaches to treat specific clinical issue (p. 70), and (b) that
further quantitative and scientific research is needed to examine the relationship between the
therapists mindfulness, their mindfulness practice and the common factors known to contribute to successful treatment outcomes (p. 70).
Although the points raised by Davis and Hayes (2012) are understandable, they highlight a
common misunderstanding: the failure to distinguish between being a mindful therapist, and a
therapist who uses mindfulness as a therapeutic technique. The authors comments suggest that
they are focusing on the latter. Their comments also appear to suggest that it is possible to
quantitatively, and scientifically, measure such qualitative effects as the psychological benefits
resulting from a therapists theoretical orientation or skills.
According to Wampold (2001), it is the qualities and characteristics of the therapist, i.e.,
therapist effects (p. 184) that account for most of the variance in treatment outcomes, and
is the most critical factor in the success of the therapy. Adherence to treatment protocols and
the type of treatment offered by the practitioner do not significantly account for the variance.
Wampold also observed that although therapists tended to focus on the technical component,
such as their skills and techniques, clients placed high value on the experiential aspect of the
relationship, such as being listened to and understood.
In the mental health area, although Buddhist ideas and practices are considered as skilful
means in helping people with clinical issues, these ideas and practices are not simply good
therapeutic tools (Khong, 2009). When mindfulness and other Buddhistoriented approaches

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are understood primarily in terms of therapeutic techniques, these practices could easily become
leveled down to a form that Guignon (1993) described as psychotechonology (p. 219).
According to Guignon (1993), when action is based on an attitude of means-ends calculation
it can give rise to a psychotechnology for selfimprovement (e.g., self-help programs and
popular workshops) where, with the guidance of experts, people think that they can reengineer
their lives according to a rational blueprint (p. 219). As I discussed earlier, this is the kind of
calculative thinking or technological attitude that Heidegger (1941=1993, p. 24) cautioned
againstthe human attitude that sees everything as standing reserve (p. 17) to be appropriated
and used in the service of something else.
Due to the deceptively simple nature of the practices, many therapists think that meditation
and mindfulness practices could be learned from reading books or attending training programs=
workshops. In my view, these practices cannot be applied skillfully and appropriately without
practitioners having a sustained personal practice, familiarizing themselves with the subtleties
of the practices, and understanding these practices in the larger context of the Buddhas teachingsseeing the tree and the forest (Khong, 2009, p. 117). A recent brochure (2012, June)
advertising training in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy: The Art of Mindfulness has the
catch phrase Do you like the idea of mindfulness without meditation? (p. 47). This brochure
is an illustration of the technological or means-ends attitude that is currently adopted toward
meditation and mindfulness and other Buddhistoriented practices.
In relation to the question posed by Davis and Hayes (2012) as to what it looks likes in a
therapy session, when a therapist uses mindfulness and Buddhistoriented approaches, in my
view, the answer would depend on from whose perspective you take. From the perspective of
the client, a Buddhist-oriented therapy session would probably be experienced by the client like
any good client-centered session, where the therapist is open to, and present with, the client,
regardless of the theoretical orientation of the therapist.
From the perspective of the therapist, a practitioner who is informed by the Buddhas teachings will endeavour to embody a meditative attitude during therapy. This kind of attitude is well
enunciated by Epstein. According to Epstein (1995), When a therapist can sit with a patient
without an agenda . . . the therapist is infusing the therapy with lessons of meditation. . . . The
patient can feel such a posture (p. 187). Elaborating on this, Epstein noted that:
The state of simply listening . . . is at once completely natural and enormously difficult. It is a challenge for therapists to put aside their desires for a patients cure, their immediate conclusions about
the patients communications and their insights into the causes of the patients suffering. . . . It is
all the more challenging to turn this kind of attention to oneself. (p. 115)

Epsteins description of a therapist embodying a meditative attitude has parallel with the Taoist
notion of wu-wei, which is best understood as action through nonaction (Khong & Thompson,
1997; also see Owens 1990). In short, being a mindful therapist is about being, rather than doing.
How has this stance of being open and being mindful in the therapy room been received by
clients? A client, Caroline, explained how this attitude facilitated her exploration of her concerns:
Caroline: Because you have a clear space . . . inside of you where I know that the space is open, fill
you with me I suppose. . . . But you personally, even though I fill that receptacle, or you
have that openness for me, you are not there. I mean, I am there. I can be there without
any impact from you. Like I am not changed by being in there.

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Therapist: Could you elaborate on that?


C: I feel that you listen to what I have to say. My experiences are not changed, given that I
share them with you. I open and tell you about my experiences, but my experiences are
still intact. Like they are not attacked. I dont feel like they are torn apart. . . . I get to look
through them more than I would if I was doing it on my own.

Carolines experience suggests that by embodying the Heideggerian and daseinsanalytic


stance of being open, and the Buddhist practice of being mindful and present with her without
an agenda, I was able to be there with her and for her.
The clinical vignettes discussed illustrate how various Buddhist ideas and practices provide
important philosophical and experiential foundations for how therapists can embody this attitude
with clients. This is analogous to the attitude of a therapist who is informed by Heideggers ideas
of openness, and being-with. Hence, in my view, Davis and Hayes (2012) comments about
what a Buddhist-oriented session looks like (i.e., How do we use them?), and how would we
measure the outcomes of such sessions (i.e., Do they work?) are not particularly helpful or
appropriate, if one understands the difference between being a mindful therapist and using mindfulness practices as therapeutic techniques. I recalled being asked by a new client, What kind of
therapist are you? I jokingly responded, A good one. Yalom (2002) explained that he tries to
avoid technique that is prefabricated and allows his choices to flow spontaneously from the
demands of the immediate clinical situation (p. 35). Yalom could well be describing some of
the qualities of a mindful therapist.
Mindfulness and Quiet Listening
In psychoanalysis, Freud (1912) recommended that therapists adopt an attitude of
evenly-suspended attention (p. 111) toward clients. According to Freud, this attitude, which
behoves the therapist to give equal notice to everything and to simply listen (p. 112) to the
client, encourages the client to freely associate without concern with censorship. Boss (1984
1985) referred to this kind of attitude as constant attentiveness (p. 122), and added that such
an attitude enables the therapist to hear beyond what is being verbalized. To acquire this stance,
Boss noted that the therapists existence must be more open and expansive than that of the
patient. Du Plock (1995) pointed to the need for the therapist to practice existential
self-analysis, which he explained as involving a continual process of self-suspicion, of
watchfulness of ones activities (p. 21).
Such recommendations to therapists are invaluable, and many therapists strive to embody this
attitude to a large extent. However, there is a significant, albeit subtle, difference between the kind
of open attitude advocated in psychotherapy and the attitude promoted by the Buddha (Khong,
2007). The stance advanced by Freud, Boss, and many psychotherapists is intended to facilitate
the therapists attentiveness to clients experiences and states of mind. This recommendation
raises two important questions: (a) How does a therapist cultivate this kind of quiet, attentive attitude, and (b) what about the therapists own state of mind? As Nyanaponika (1992) put it, One
who is mindful will first mind his own minds business (p. 81). Mindfulness practice encourages
therapists to just wait and listen quietly not only to the clients dialogue, but also to the therapists
own internal dialogue. This attitude of quiet listening makes it possible for therapists to be

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KHONG

constantly aware of their own states of mind, and not allow the murmurings to impede their
openness to the client (Khong, 2004).
How do we bracket conceptualising, interpreting, judging and listen quietly? The ordinary
mind is constantly chattering and ruminating, carrying on its own conversation. You could check
this out for yourself. As you read this article, you may be thinking, I like that or I am not sure
that I agree with that and so forth. No matter how rigorously people wish to suspend their bias,
judgements and preconceptions, and to remain open, if the bracketing is affected intellectually (as
opposed to experientially) it has its limitations. According to Rubin (1996), it is fallacy to think
that one can attempt to observe and listen in this manner without quieting the mind (p. 124).
The Buddhas teachings on meditation and mindfulness focus on the importance of personal
experience and practice. Tranquility meditation and mindfulness practices equip the therapist
with the skills and mental discipline to quiet the mind and to focus. As Kabat-Zinn (1994)
explained with continued practice and gentle effort, calmness, mindfulness, and equanimity
develop, and one is able to observe everything that is unfolding, especially in our minds and
bodies, without reacting and judging. In psychotherapy, the means of helping therapists to cultivate this kind of open and accepting attitude is currently lacking.
My own experience has shown me that no matter how engaged I am with clients, sometimes
my mind wanders, and sometimes I am affected by the clients rising anxiety, or my own sense
of frustration in dealing with the same issues over and over again without much insight on the
part of the client. At other times, especially after a long day of counselling, I am mindful that my
tolerance level, and hence my ability to listen quietly, is reduced.
In the early days of practice, I would worry about the wanderings of my mind, my loss of
equanimity, and attempt to put in more effort to focus on what the client is saying. Nowadays,
with the help of meditation and mindfulness practice, I am able to interrupt this tendency in its
early stages (e.g., when I sense rising tension in my body, or am aware of my mind wandering,
or that I am lost in my own thoughts). At such times, instead of forcing my attention back to the
discussion, or criticizing my own inattentiveness, I gently return my focus to my breath, and let
the rumination subside. I have also learned to let my feelings and thoughts to be just as they are
in that moment, accepting that these feelings and thoughts will come and go If I dont attend to,
or get attached to, them. I believe that my years of practicing meditation and mindfulness has
stood me in good stead, and has given me the discipline as Nyanaponika (1992) put it, to mind
my own minds business moment by moment, and to remain open and present with the client in
a sustained manner.

Letting Be and Letting Go


In his teachings, the Buddha recommends adopting an attitude of seeing and accepting things for
what they are, and learning to let them go (Jayasuriya, 1963). The call by Heidegger (1959=
1966) to let things be, that is for people to refrain from imposing their will upon things, mirrors
aspects of this Buddhist approach. This kind of attitude is especially relevant to being a therapist,
and has been adopted in daseinsanalysis.
Letting be and letting go enables therapists to free themselves from preconceived notions and
theories about clients and cures and to cultivate what Buddhists refers to as a beginners
mind (Epstein, 2003, p. 17), that is learning to tolerate uncertainty and seeing each situation

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afresh (Fulton, 2005). According to the Buddha, a person who develops this attitude is described
as being in a state of equanimity, able to appraise realistically the relativity of the situation, and
to transcend extremes and opposites in his or her responses (Bodhi, 1994). Heideggers advice
for people to adopt a meditative attitude and just waitdoing nothing, becoming more
void, more empty but richer in possibilitieshas parallels with the attitude recommended by
the Buddha.
Notwithstanding the similarities between the Heideggerian notion of letting be, and the
Buddhist idea of letting go, there are two significant differences in how an individual could cultivate this attitude. In Heideggers philosophy, the idea of letting be encourages people to accept
what they encounter and allow them to unfold naturally. Although letting be does reduce the
tendency to prejudge things and to accept what shows up, sometimes people can accept things
but in the process become attached to what unfolds. The element of letting go highlighted in the
Buddhas teachings is not emphasized in Heideggers approach.
The Buddhist notion of letting go entails not only acceptance, but inner relinquishment.
According to Sumedho (1992), a well-known Buddhist monk and meditation teacher, letting
go is not repressing or discarding our thinking and feelings. Instead, it involves being mindful of our feelings and thoughts, and learning not to be attached to them. Sumedho pointed
out that one cannot analyse letting go intellectually; one just has to let go, moment by
moment.
From a Buddhist perspective, letting go can be cultivated, for example, through being mindful
of internal dialogue and returning the focus to the breath continually, thereby reducing the
tendency to ruminate. This experiential way of cultivating a meditative attitude is absent in
Heideggers philosophy. As noted earlier, for Heidegger, releasement and letting be involves
persistent courageous thinking. From this perspective, there is still an element of will, albeit
through nonconceptual thinking. Buddhism emphasises an experiential approach, that of nondoing, rather than nonthinking. In short, the Buddhist approach promotes a way of being, as
opposed to a way of thinking.
In the therapeutic context, cultivating an attitude of letting be and letting go enhances the
therapists ability to respond mindfully. The idea is to let go of what should be, and to respond
appropriately and skilfully to what is called for in each unique situation.

CONCLUSION
In this article, I have shown that for therapists, the most important elements are first being a
human being, and then secondarily being a professional. Unfortunately, most schools of psychology and psychotherapy have not emphasized the former, and professional training is mainly
geared toward psychologists learning how to provide therapy, rather than in being a therapist. I
have also discussed how Heideggers ideas, daseinsanalytic practices, and Buddhist concepts
and practices provide important philosophical and experiential foundations for psychotherapy,
and can contribute significantly to psychology, a profession that, when pared to its essentials,
is after all a human activity concerned with healing rather than curing people. When the ideas
and practices from the three schools of thoughts are integrated into the therapeutic relationship,
and embodied by the therapist, this human activity becomes, as Yalom (2002) described it, a
relationship between fellow travellers (p. 8).

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The benefits to the clients of a therapist embodying this way of being was brought home to
me poignantly by a client, Mark. He sought counselling to learn to manage his anger and recurring episodes of panic attack. Elsewhere (Khong, 2009), I have written about how Mark learned
to overcome these concerns through the use of meditation and mindfulness practice.
In a recent therapy session with Mark, I shared with him my experiencing him as less
anxious, and being more thoughtful of others, and less prone to anger. I was amazed to hear
his explanation as to how he acquired a different way of being in the world. To capture the spirit
of Marks account, I have detailed part of our session at some length:
Mark: Having anxiety helps, and mindfulness helps me to be more aware. I also understand
more about humanity, and what humans are about. We have similar struggles in life,
and having to balance different aspects of our lives.
Therapist: Could you elaborate on that?
M: Like they say in meditation, we are all in it together. Everyone is struggling with
something in life, and trying our best to deal with it in the best way that we can.
T: All in it together?
M: It is more the philosophy that I gained from practising loving kindness [compassion]
meditation, and mindfulness. Meditation increases the capacity for experiencing compassion. It reduces the focus on yourself. I consider others more, and am more compassionate towards people e.g., colleagues and clients. Meditation is an antidote to
anger. I previously experienced a lot of anger towards a certain client. With compassion
meditation, its like give others a break, which I was previously reluctant to do. But now
I realize that it is actually give myself a break,
T: How so?
M: Because I dont have the anger anymore. It takes a lot of energy to be angry and to carry
anger. Like anxiety. If I have an overwhelming sense of anger, I have less option to
respond. Anger limits my thinking and creativity, and when I get caught up in anger,
I have less choice.

Marks experience illustrates several important points in this article. First, despite my not having discussed with him the Heideggerian ideas of openness and being-with, his statements about
understanding humanity and what it means to human appear to bear out Heideggers contention
that these qualities are ontological characteristics of human beings. Additionally, his use of
Buddhist meditation and mindfulness practices appeared to have facilitated his cultivating a
more meditative attitude, of being more open and compassionate toward himself and others.
Second, Marks experience exemplifies the efficacy of daseinsanalytic therapy, the aim of
which is to enable clients to become more free and transparent to themselves, to recognize their
possibilities and to choose from amongst them responsibility (Hoch, 1968). Mark, electing to
relate to the world differently, demonstrates this sense of freedom and increased capability to
make responsible choices.
Finally, Marks insights underscore the main theme of this article: that psychotherapy, as previously noted by Condrau (1998), is an activity that involves therapist and client experiencing
each other as fellow human beings. I believe that when a therapist is authentic and willing to
allow his or her humanity to come forth in the therapeutic relationship, the authenticity and
humanity of the client often comes into being as well.
The therapeutic relationship provides a rare opportunity for clients to feel comfortable with
selfdisclosure, rather with self-presentation. I believe that we can best honor and do justice

BEING A THERAPIST

245

to our clients courage in walking into our rooms to share their secrets when we relate to them
not in terms of their symptoms, issues, diagnoses, and diagnostic tools, but as unique individuals
and facilitate them to get in touch with what is good and whole about themselves. And when, in
a deep and profound way, we acknowledge that our clients are just like us, wanting, as his
Holiness, the Dalai Lama is often heard to remark, to be happy.

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ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
This article is from a paper presented at the symposium on Bringing Heidegger HomeA
Journey Through the Lived Worlds of Psychologists and Philosophers, 120th Annual Convention of the American Psychological Association, Orlando, Florida, August, 2012.
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AUTHOR NOTE
Belinda Siew Luan Khong, Ph.D., is a practising psychologist and lecturer at the Department of Psychology,
Macquarie University. Sydney. She is a member of the editorial boards of The Humanistic Psychologist and Mindfulness. Her counselling and research interests include integrating Western and Eastern approaches to psychology,
health, and well-being, and she has published extensively in these areas. She was guest editor for The Humanistic
Psychologist Special Issue (2009) on Mindfulness in Psychology.

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