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com

Text Game Field Guide

Every bootcamp we have guys with a ton of girls theyve met and fresh
numbers in their phones. We receive reams of emails from guys wondering
what is the next step to take after meeting and attracting a beautiful woman.
The inevitable question is: What should they do nextwhat should they text
the girl?
After having spent the time building up the confidence to approach a
random stranger you thought looked interesting, conveyed who you are
attractively and authentically, and pulled the trigger to get the girls number,
youre sat there staring at a blank message screen and wondering what the
hell you do next.
How can you use your messages to get the girl attracted to you? What kind of
messages will build comfort so she trusts she can meet you? How do you use
messages to build a rapport between you and the girl?
It was because of these kinds of questions that we knew we could oer a lot
of value by explaining good text game. It seems there is a ton of information
out there about dierent types of messages to send to achieve certain
eects, to amp up certain feelings, to build a connection.
This field guide is going to give you all the information you need, including
real examples of specific messages you can send, and how to invite girls out.
But before we get to all this, we need to be open and tell you the truth about
text game:
There is no such thing as text game
Of course, this seems contradictory to the aim of this field guideand isnt it
obvious that certain messages are good and others bad?
The reason Im saying this is because, if youre looking at texting as a way of
building attraction, making a connection, or making yourself seem a certain

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way to the girl, the main takeaway from this field guide is that these are not
the aims of text game.
Good texting is not about using game to create certain thoughts and
feelings in the girl out of nothing, based purely upon certain messages you
send. The girls connection to you, her attraction to you, and her trust of you
should all have been cemented in your approach.
Think about it. The first text message was sent in 1992. That means text
messaging is just over 20 years old. As a popular phenomenon, texting is
maybe slightly over 10 years old. In contrast, for as long as humans have
existed, they have communicated face to face.
All the strongest feelings we have and most genuine judgements we make of
others are from true interpersonal interactions, in the flesh. Thats why it is
possible to meet a girl whos never been with a guy before and take her home
the same day, whereas even some girls actively looking for relationships on
online dating sites could take weeks of messages back and forth just to get
them out for coee.
Unless youre looking to spend triple the time sat at your phone composing
messages than going about your actual life, you should take it for granted
that attraction, trust, and connections are built through signals that are most
eectively conveyed in person. These are honest signals of your value as a
man that are exceedingly dicult to fake in real life. In contrast, text
messages are devoid of all the nuance of real life interactions: the facial
expressions, microexpressions, tonality and timing are all absent.
A text message even a great one is inherently unable to convey as much
value as the simple act of saying Hello in real life. In short, the text message is
an inecient method of creating attraction, comfort, or connection with a
girl. So
What is text game and what is the point of texting?
Text game is about maintaining the positive feelings of the girl towards you
for the sole purpose of meeting up with her again. Provided that you have
made a strong and positive impression on the girl when you first met her,

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your only job is to remain congruent with the qualities she found attractive in
your initial interaction.
In essence, texting is about sustaining the bubble of attraction and intrigue
that drew the two of you together, so that you can meet again. If that bubble
was never there, you are not going to be able to create it via text. If she was
not attracted to you in real life, she will not become attracted to you because
of any text game skills.
For some, this may seem unfortunate perhaps you thought there were
some text game secrets to make any girl attracted to you. This is not the
casebut its a good thing. It means that you really have very little to learn in
order to achieve solid text game.
Unless you convey through your texting that you are not the attractive man
the girl thought you were on your first approach, a girl who was attracted to
you will be receptive to your messages. A girl who was not attracted to you is
very unlikely to become attracted to you because of any texts that you send.
The message does not exist in a vacuum. It is a continuation of your initial
interaction, and a bridge to further contact.
The girl filters your messages through her perception of you from real life and
interprets them in line with this.
More weight is given to real life interaction than texting because face to face
interaction provides stronger, more honest signals than text messages. The
girls interpretations of what you write will be more positive given an initial
positive interaction, even to seemingly bad messages. Likewise, even good
or interesting messages will be skewed negatively given an initially negative
interaction. Therefore, focusing on having great approaches will pay much
greater dividends than investing in text game tricks to try and salvage bad
approaches that lead to flakey numbers.
Summary:
Good text game is about converting solid numbers into dates. This is done
by remaining congruent with the attractive qualities you displayed when you

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met the girl, and thereby sustaining the attraction and connection between
you.
The 3 fundamental rules of texting
Solid texting revolves around maintaining the qualities that had the girl
attracted to you in your first meeting. At a broad stroke, these can be put into
the following three fundamental rules you should follow/qualities you should
convey in through your texting:
1. Be non-needy
2. Be light, playful and cheeky
3. Lead
Neediness is a clear signal of an unattractive man. The man with options is
not caught up in whether a girl he has met texts him back. Nor is he bothered
about sending essay length messages. In general, this means that texts
should be kept short no rambling, no asking of boring and unnecessary
questions, no chasing up with multiple messages if the girl doesnt reply in 10
minutes.
Taking the texting in your stride and approaching it with a playful attitude is
essential. This doesnt mean that you are trying to clownishly entertain the
girl with your messages, but rather that you do not use messages to weigh
down the girl with boredom and seriousness. You barely know this person
(and she barely knows you), so this is not the time to tell her how incredible
you thought she was and to tell her how much you want to see her again. Its
also not the time to whip out the interview questions to check the girls
credentials. The two of you meeting up should be natural and fun, not the
first stages of marriage.
As with all stages of meeting women, it is you who must take the
responsibility to lead and push the interaction further. In most instances, the
girl will at most drop hints that she is ready to take things to the next level. It
is your job to pull the trigger and make this happen. This means that you

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should not rely on the girl to text you first, nor should you anticipate her
suggesting you go out together.
Your first text message
As has been said, it is unlikely that you will convert a girl who is not interested
in you to being attracted to you by texting in a way that is non-needy, light
and playful, and takes the lead. If the girl was not interested in you, she is
already filtering out what you have to say. However, by being needy, boring,
and weak, you can cut the connection and attraction that you sparked with a
girl in your initial meeting.
We can use the example of the first message you send to the girl to
demonstrate the dierence between good and bad texting:
Hi Sarah. Its James, the guy you met outside Urban Outfitters. It was really
nice to meet you did you get your shopping done? I was thinking maybe we
could meet up, are you free any days next week?
Firstly, this text is extremely needy. It conveys a lack of confidence by
suggesting that the girl wouldnt even remember who you are. The second
sentence is the opposite of playful or cheeky. It follows the standard etiquette
of politeness as if talking with a family friend, and asks an extremely boring
question that probably you wouldnt even care about the answer to. Finally,
the message immediately suggests a date, and does so in a way that suggests
a total lack of a life you dont have anything going on so any day that the
girl might be free is bound to be good for you
If the girl was really into you when you met her, or was simply dying to be
asked out by someone, then you might get away with this. In all other
situations, youd have done yourself a disservice!
So, whilst there might not be such a thing as text game in the strict sense of
crafting messages that create all the qualities you should have conveyed in
person, there are ways you can pop the bubble of attraction you created by
not following the 3 principles.
What should you write in your first text message?

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We advocate that you send the girl a message the same day that you meet
her. The reason for this is that you want to keep the memory of you fresh in
her mind the girl may be feeling great about your interaction for the next
couple of hours, but as the rest of the day wears on, this feeling dies down.
You want to drop her a message just to solidify that you are a real person, and
to keep that feeling of having had an awesome experience near the top of
her mind. You should do this an hour or two after, or later in the evening if its
a weekday or Sunday, when she is unlikely to be out and distracted by other
things. You should do it sooner if its a weekend and you imagine she will be
out with friends when you message, or if you will be out.
Template for your first message
Keep your first message short, and dont put stu in there that demands a
response. Your goal for this first text is not to initiate a long conversation but
just to keep yourself fresh in their mind. You can use the following template
as a basis for the what to send as a first message:
Hey [call back humour/tease], random but cool to meet you[Your Name].
You want to inject some call back humour to remind them of the vibe you
had together in a light hearted way. This could include your observation of
what she was doing when you first spoke to her (e.g. shopaholic), or refer to
something you teased her about. End with your name just so that they know
exactly what it is. The girl is very likely to remember you, but if they cant
exactly remember what your name was (often it only comes up very briefly
Im very bad with names myself!) then she will be embarrassed to tell her
friends that she is going to meet you and it could count against you.
By not ending your message with a question, you also gain some insight into
the degree of the girls attraction to you. If she writes back positively even
though you didnt ask something specific, it is a good sign. However, cheeky
questions at the end of your message are also totally acceptable. On
bootcamps we often suggest students end their message with a question
like:
are you always so friendly to new people?!.

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These can be good because they cement the idea of being a new person
rather than a stranger. It also flips the script a little, suggesting that she was
the one being overly friendly, rather than you for approaching her.
Experiment with these and play around with what you write in your first
message. Remember the aim of being non-needy, fun/cheeky, and leading
(i.e. actually sending the first message so many people ultimately avoid this
so that they can avoid rejection!).
After this first message and her response, you do not necessarily need to
continue the conversation especially if she doesnt ask you any questions or
say anything particularly interesting. The goal was simply to drop the girl
your contact details and remind her who you are, to sustain the great vibe
you created when you met her.
Opening message examples:
Example 1:
04:09:45

Me:
So this is the cute future Andy Warhol...nice to
meet you young lady ;)
04:17:03

Anna Gallery:
?
04:18:20

Anna Gallery:
:)
04:18:48

Anna Gallery:
Nice to meet you [Name]

Example 2:
01:51:46

Me:
I hope your team appreciated having a cute
meditating cheerleader on their side...random
but cool meeting you ;) [Name]
02:15:39

Amanda Track:
Totally random but totally appreciated:) I

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thought you coming up to me was really chill

Example one uses some throwback humour referring to how we met I

approached her in an art gallery, so I jokily suggest she has ambitions to be a
famous artist.
In example two, I met the girl waiting to be picked up by her track team bus
outside the gym. She had a minor injury so she was just going to support the
team hence I cheekily refer to her as a cheerleader, the stereotype of which
was pretty much the polar opposite of her personality.
In both examples, I state that I thought the girls were cute. This isnt
necessary, but I like to do it to reinforce that I found them attractive and am
interested in them romantically rather than just being a text buddy.
Summary:
Send a message the same day you met the girl
Keep it short
Use callback humour
Ask no questions, or a cheeky question
Sign o with your name
Following up your first text: Ping texting
Follow up your initial message(s) a couple of days later. Again, the goal is not
to initiate long conversations where you build attraction or comfort, it is
simply to keep you fresh in the girls mind and bridge the time until you can
meet her again. To achieve this, we developed the idea of ping texts.
Ping texts are based on what we noticed a lot of popular girls tend to do.
Rather than sending specific questions or long winded messages, a girl who
wants to stay on your mind will send short, punchy messages that refer to
something cool or funny shes doing or that she has seen. These dont even
require a response (they are non-needy), but the girl knows that if you like
her and the message is light hearted, you will feel compelled to acknowledge
it.

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Using these types of messages will give the girl a window into your life by
showing what you are up to, and also show that you have stu going on. By
avoiding long winded questions they also imply a degree of busyness. You
actually should have a bunch of other things to do in your day than waiting
around for the right time to message a girl!
What makes a good ping text?:
They are statements rather than questions
They are dierent they show something funny or unexpected
They are short
Dont try to get overly sophisticated about your ping text or start writing
stand-up comedy. Simple, short, and sweet is good. Just note things youve
seen about your day, and send one of them to the girl:
Just seen two squirrels fighting
Lounging in the sun with my new booklife is good :)
Such a funny day my friend got avalanched from a roof on their way to meet
me!
Quirky and interesting photos can also be a great way of conveying a funny
message through an image. You can jokily play on stereotypes by sending
photos of items associated with the girls country that you know dont apply
to them if youre in a shop and you see an extremely unfashionable
sombrero, you could send a picture of it to that Mexican girl you met with the
caption: I think you forgot something.
Its even better if the message or picture can directly relate to what you have
spoken about with the girl. If she told you of her passion for French cuisine,
you can take the mickey a little by sending a picture of a snail you saw on
your way to work with a caption like: Sooo hungry.
Again, you can ask questions if you keep them fun/light hearted. Rather than
asking the girl what she is doing today, ask are you behaving?.. or something
similar.
Example of ping texting:

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00:59:13

Me:
Such a funny day my friend got avalanched from
a roof on their way to meet me :) what mischief
have you been up to?
03:13:15

Hannah Medicine:
Ahah yeah that happened to me when I opened
my car door
03:16:46

Hannah Medicine:
No mischief yet tonight. And you?

Me:
Just tripped out on a hallucinogen for a
research study...I thought I was a dolphin
02:04:29

Layla Actress:
Hahahahaha!! That's bananas
02:05:18

Layla Actress:
I for one was a jellyfish

Summary:
Be dierent: funny or interesting
Make the message show something about you, or refer to something
about them
Use statements, or ask cheeky questions
You can use picture messages to send funny photos and add a
comment
Texting back and forth and arranging a date
After your ping texts, you might find the girl starts sending you her own. She
may start responding with questions of her own to find out a bit more about
you. You want to encourage her moves to invest in you, but avoid getting
caught up in long, drawn out conversations. Long conversations via text tend
to become boring and there is a risk that things you say will not be

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interpreted how you intend because of the lack of non-verbal cues.

When the girl responds to your messages, keep in mind that if she asks you a
question, it doesnt necessarily mean she wants or needs an answer to that
question it simply means that she wants a response. You cant rely on the
girl to keep the conversation exciting, and left to the girls devices the
conversation is likely to turn into her asking you boring questions, then her
getting bored, and eventually her stopping responding to your texts. Just
keep your responses light. This doesnt mean you should avoid all the
questions she asks, as this may get frustrating for her or she may become
suspicious of what you are hiding. It merely means to keep the conversation
fun dont get sucked into interview mode.
If the girl is responsive to your texts, the messages begin flowing between
you without big time gaps, and there is some investment on her part (e.g.
asking questions, sending longer messages), its a sign that shes interested
and ready to meet up with you.
At this point, leading becomes fundamental. Rather than asking the girl if its
okay for you to take her out, youre going to tell her that you want to and
suggest options.
Date text template:
Lets go for a cheeky cocktail in [location] this weekis [day 1] or [day 2] better
for you? :)
This template has a number of strong points.
Firstly, the message shows confidence by conveying that you believe the girl
is attracted to you and would be happy to meet up with you. This is not false
confidence, but social intelligence. If you met the girl and told her you found
her attractive, then have been messaging with her, the two of you meeting
up is nothing more than the next natural step to take.
If you ask the girl what days she is free, it implies that you have no other plans
for the whole week and are completely open to whatever her plans are. You
are also relieving yourself of the responsibility to lead, and the girl can feel

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this as a burden upon her. Take the reins! Girls appreciate when you are sure
of yourself and have plans with what you intend to do. If anything, they dont
want to be blamed for choosing a bad date!
By giving two possible dates, you give flexibility for the girl to work the date
into her schedule, but indicate that you do have plans for other nights. When
oering two days, you generally want to avoid Friday and Saturday, as these
are times when many girls will have plans to go out already adapt this to
what your local conventions are.
If the girl responds yes, then simply send her a time and a location:
Cool, Ill meet you outside the station at 8. Look good, so we match ;)
Example of date time and location confirmation:
Me: 6pm sound good?
Nina Surfer: Yes sir
Me: Ill be by [location]. Dress cute, so we match ;-)
Nina Surfer: Arent u bossy! What do you deem as cute?
Me: Hmm...your favourite summer dress, surprise me
Me: Or a Pikachu costume
Nina Surfer: Lol random...that sounds like you have a fetish
Me: You jump straight to fetishes?..night night

In this example, I send the girl confirmation and she jokily tests the frame that
I set up of leading and deciding where were going by accusing me of being
bossy. This is essentially a compliment, as I know from seeing how she
behaves around other people that she normally dominates them. I brush over
it and suggest she surprises me at the same time I add a tease by saying she
might also consider a Pokemon costume. When she takes this to accuse me of
having a fetish, I flip it and jokily imply that all shes overly quick to jump to
sexual ideas again confirming that we are not going to be meeting up as
just friends. I then cut the thread on a high note, as I dont want to be texting
back and forth forever!
You can clearly see from this what is meant by keeping things cheeky, light

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and playful the two of us are just joking around together. It is clear she is
happy to meet me Im not doing anything in the text to create attraction, I
just keep the vibe how it was when we met and sustain it by keeping our
contact short and preventing it from becoming an interview.
If the girl responds that she cant, this isnt the end of the world. Many girls
will have legitimate reasons they cant meet, and will oer an alternative. If
she oers no alternative, this doesnt mean shes not interested. Just step
back, keep things light and fun in your response, and send another ping text
in a couple of days. If she doesnt respond to these then its probable that
shes lost interest: move on. If the girl gives no alternative and also random
excuses like Im looking after my friend, shes sick, this is probably an excuse
meant to let you down gently. Again, you can keep it light in your responses
and ping again in a few days, but dont get hung up. If the girl is not
responding, delete the number and move on.
Summary:
Judge the girls investment by looking at her responses to you
Lead by suggesting a place to go
Give her one or two options, rather than leaving your schedule totally
open
Leading up to the date
Ideally, you should arrange the date just a couple of days in advance. If you
arrange things further ahead of time, the chance of flakes increases. To
reduce this, it can help to send a ping some time in between you arranging
the date and your actual meeting, just to keep the two of you connected. On
the day of the date, rather than sending messages to check if the girl is still
going to join you, send a message an hour or so before to tell her youre
running a bit late:
Crazy day at workIll be there at 8.30, cool?
If she responds to this, youll know shes coming. If she does flake, dont get
hung up on it its just part of the game.

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Example of the flake-check text:

Me:
I'm running a bit late but I'll be there 8.15 :)
00:31:48

Layla Actress:
Haha great cause I am too

Summary:
If the date is further away than a few days, send a ping text to keep
yourself in her mind
If you think the girl might flake, send a flake check text an hour or so
before your meeting
After your date
After your date you could be in a number of situations. If you took the girl
home then the gentlemanly thing to do is to send her something in the next
day or two to let her know you had a good time!
If the date was a disaster, just move on. There are plenty of other girls for you
to be dating!
If the date went well but the two of you didnt spend the night together, you
dont need to send the girl a text the same night. In many situations, the girl
might text you and thank you for a good night. You can respond likewise, but
dont get soppy or overly romantic. After all, youve only been on one date,
and this isnt a romance novel, its real life keep it short and hit the hay. You
could even tease her lightly: Dont have any dreams about me ;).
If she doesnt text you, just wait another couple of days and then re-initiate
with some ping texts. Remember that the girl can feel your silence as much as
you can feel hers, and she enjoys the chase no one wants what they can have
easily. This means you dont need to panic if she doesnt text you immediately,
and you dont need to be worried about having something amazing to send
her the next day. Youll now have much more of a feeling for who the girl is
and what sort of things interest her, so you can use these to help with what
sort of stu you think shed find more funny or relevant. However, standard

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pings like the ones above will always be okay. The same principles for your
texting apply:
1. Be non-needy
2. Be light, playful and cheeky
3. Lead
Follow these steps to lead up to suggesting a second date, using the same
method as you did for arranging the first. If your first date was in a neutral
location, then suggest this date at a location closer to your place.
Alternatively, you can suggest an adventure date, such as cycling or other
(preferably cheap) spontaneous activity to do. It should be something where
you will have plenty of opportunity to interact with each other and tease her
(e.g. for her cycling skills), not sitting in a cinema and watching a movie in
silence for 2 hours!
Summary:
If the girl texts you after the date, keep it light and short
If she doesnt text you, dont worry. Send a ping text a couple of days
after
Arrange your second date as you did your first, and consider a dierent
location or activity

Conclusion
Text game is nothing magical. You dont use your phone to create what
wasnt there in real life; its a tool to bridge the gap between your initial
meeting and dating the girl. Solid text game revolves around the 3
fundamentals: being non-needy, keeping it light and cheeky, and leading.
Follow this guide and youll eortlessly convert numbers into dates. And
dont forgetwe love to hear your success stories!

Bonus Material

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Yads Texting tips

We asked Yad to give us the low down on how he goes about texting, and
what rules he follows. If you keep these tips in mind, youll be sure to hit the
three fundamentals of texting.
1. Think about the ease of response for the other person. Whenever you
write the text, imagine yourself receiving it. Is it easy to understand and
respond to? Is there any potential for confusion? Is it light hearted or
does it weigh the person down with the need to make a serious
response? You want to make the text as simple to understand and easy
to respond to as possible.
2. Dont complicate things. Youre writing a txt message, not a novel. Keep
it short and stick to one simple statement per message.
3. Dont overuse emoticons and punctuation. Youre not a teenage girl.
Emoticons and exclamation marks can be a great way to signal when
you are teasing or being tongue-in-cheek, but otherwise keep them to
a minimum. If you look at your messages and every single one has an
emoticon, then you should consider cutting down on their use.
4. If the initial conversation was not good, texting doesnt matter. The text
just continues the vibe you already had it doesnt create something
out of nothing, so dont get hung up on your text messages. Follow the
basic principles and you will do well if your initial interaction was good.
5. Use call-back humour. In your first message, its great to use call-back
humour from your initial meeting with the girl. However, you want to
avoid unnaturally crow-barring a joke into the text just because you
have thought of one thats needy!
6. Avoid rambling conversations. If she loved your interaction, it should be
quick and easy to arrange a date. Dont kill the vibe by getting stuck in
boring, rambling conversations.
7. Look at the size of your text blocks. If you compare the size of the girls
messages to yours and there is a clear disparity (you texting more than

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the girl), then reduce the amount of information you are putting in to
each text
8. The text is a means to a date. You are texting solely to bridge the gap to
meeting the girl again.