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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Would it help if I told you how moved I was


by The Vagina Monologues?

Lee Lorenz (1/10/2000)

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attraction bar bars dating entertainer entertainers entertainment entertains flirt flirtations flirting flirts general hits love man monologues performer performers pickups scenes sex sunglasses the theatre unsuccessfully voluptuous woman 165815

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its Lyme disease again.

Danny Shanahan (1/10/2000)

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christmas claus contracted deer disease doctor doctors exam examination examinations examining exams fitness gotten health hospital hospitals ill medical patient patients physician physicians presumably reindeer room santa santas sick sickness ticks 16581 6

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im sorry, Jim. I love you, but I hate Vermont.

William Haefeli (1/10/2000)

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couple couples gay homosexual homosexuality husband husbands legalizing legislation lover man marriage married matrimony men proposal proposals propose proposes recent refers regional relationship relationships state states 165817

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And youre also trailing in the polls.

Peter Porges (1/10/2000)

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bed bedroom civil elections government governments husband lay nonplused political politicians politics poll polls relationships scenes sex together vote voter voters votes voting wife 165818

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Here I was, all this time, worrying that maybe Im a


selfish person, and now it turns out Ive been suffering
from compassion fatigue.

David Sipress (1/10/2000)

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annoyed another beg beggar beggars begging bum bums charity compassion cup fatigue language looking man one panhandler beggar pass play poor scenes selfish street tin tramp tramps word 165819

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hes been in a marvellous mood ever since he learned one


out of every hundred and fifty Americans is in jail.

Gahan Wilson (1/10/2000)

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administrative arrogance assistant assistants boss bosss bosses business businessman businessmen cell cells complacent convict convicts corporate crime executive executives insecurity jail jails mood office offices polls prison prisoner prisoners prisons professional professionals secretary smile statistics work working works 165820

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And now, for your entertainment, I will drink a glass


of water while Rempert, here, remains eerily silent.

Christopher Weyant (1/10/2000)

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act cliche cliches dummy entertainer entertainers entertainment entertains incompetents introduces performer performers portion silent theater vaudeville ventriloquist ventriloquists water water-drinking 165821

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

For an extra fifty bucks, Ill let you show me your Palm Pilot.

Alex Gregory (1/10/2000)

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boots car computers fee fish language leans man money nets over pay play prostitute prostitutes service street talk technology thigh-high walker whore word 165822

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Living brings up a lot of issues for him.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (1/10/2000)

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armchair attack couple couples doorway friend general having husband husbands incompetents insecurity issues lady life man marriage married matrimony panic problems psychiatry psychologist psychologists psychology relationship relationships wife wives 165823

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (1/10/2000)

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10

biographies books business businessman businessmen corporate entertainment executive executives general great home man office offices professional professionals program programs secrets show shows television televisions tv tvs video videos watches work working works 165824

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Love the exposed brick.

Harry Bliss (1/10/2000)

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11

against apartments barrel beggars bricks building bum bums decorating decorations decorators drinking drum fire fires hands home homeless homes house houses interior leaning life liquor modern oil one other over poor poverty says second tramp tramps warming 165825

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im supposed to be someplace downtown right now,


sucking the air out of the room.

Michael Crawford (1/10/2000)

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12

bar bars bartender cigarette cities city conversation conversations discussion discussions executives general glasses holding language man manhattan n.y. n.y.c. neighborhood neighborhoods new ny nyc play sucking talk talking thick-rimmed urban word york 165826

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sometimes having to have the happy childhood my parents


never had is just too much of a responsibility.

Barbara Smaller (1/10/2000)

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13

animals bed bedroom canopy child children dad dads daughter daughters dolls etc everywhere families family father fathers general girls girls happy kid kids little mom moms mother mothers parent parents play responsibility stuffed toys two well-decorated young youth 165827

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

July, 1967. An antiques fair in Peekskill, New York.


A gorgeous eighteenth-century French armoire for an
unbelievable three hundred dollars. Whats-his-name
here says, This we dont need. Are you getting
the picture?
Robert Weber (1/10/2000)

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14

analyst antique antiques argue argues arguing argument arguments consumer counselor counselors couple couples fighting fights furniture general husband husbands incompetents marital marriage married matrimony patient patients prices problem problems psychiatrist psychiatrists psychiatry psychologist psychologists psychology relationship relationships session therapist therapists therapy this wife wives 165828

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Explain something to me. Are boned and


deboned the same thing?

Leo Cullum (1/10/2000)

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15

animal animals bird birds bone boned chicken chickens cook cooking cuisine deboned discuss expressio expression far farm farms farmyard language meaning play poultry rural same talking two word 165829

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (1/10/2000)

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16

advice birth captionless center chore chores clean cliche cliches cycle death doors entrance exit expression expressions inside life machine machines marked modern person phrase phrases play room spinning washing word 165830

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Captain, it looks like weve entered cyberspace.

Peter Steiner (1/10/2000)

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17

brokers budget budgets computers cyberspace dollar encounter field finance finances floating income internet market men money paper prices recent refers rich riches sci sci-fi ship ships space spaceship spike stock stocks travel two wealth wealthy web 165831

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Weve enjoyed our little visit, son, but wed better


leaveI think theyre getting ready to fire.

Frank Cotham (1/10/2000)

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18

child children dad dads dead death die dying enjoy executions families family father fathers fire firing general guns kid kids kill killing mom moms mother mothers parent parents prison prisoners punishment shot son sons squad violence violent visit visiting young youth 165832

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ive done the numbers, and I will marry you.

William Hamilton (1/10/2000)

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19

accepting accountants budget budgets couple couples finance finances husband husbands language marketplace marriage married marry matrimony money national npr numbers office play proposal proposals public radio refers relationship relationships rich riches show suitor wealth wealthy wife wives woman word 165833

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ive decided to step down, Chilton, and,


regrettably, youre underfoot.

Danny Shanahan (1/10/2000)

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20

boss bosses business career careers desk elderly employee employees employer employers employment executive executives fire fired firing front general hierarchy job jobs management occupation occupations office profession professions retire retiring standing step underfoot unemployed unemployment work worker workers working works 165834

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Right. How could anyone look at a rotting zebra corpse


and not believe theres a God?

Charles Barsotti (1/10/2000)

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21

animal animals bible biblical businessmen catholic catholicism christ christian christianity corpses dead death die discuss dying general god lion lions religion religious talking tigers two zebras 165835

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We feel that your female characters are somewhat undeveloped.

Robert Mankoff (1/10/2000)

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22

age author authors book books caveman cavemen characters club editors essay essays female females fiction gender genders literature machismo male males man men neanderthal novel novels office prehistoric publication publications publishers publishing rejects she sits stone stories story woman women writer writers 165836

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

There comes a point in a mans life when he just has to


stop and say, O.K., I have hair on my back.

William Haefeli (1/10/2000)

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23

age appearance appearances around back bly chairs drinking hair iced insecurity life men middle modern o robert shave shaving sitting talking tea three wax waxing wicker 165837

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (1/10/2000)

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24

art artist bismol bottle bottles bowl broken chairs chast chestnut chimes cities city clips coffee color computers consumer consumerism drawing folk frames full-page furniture hot-dog it jewelry latte manhattan menu menus midtown mineral n.y. n.y.c. new nine-panel note ny nyc obsolete-technology out paper paper-clip pepto picture portrait post quilt quilts restaurants roasted roz rug rugs sabretts scotch sculpture showing style styles takeout technology telephones trend trends typewriters umbrella umbrellas urban water
white york 165838

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You know, Burkhart, if youre so damn afraid of the flu


maybe you should just stay home.

Robert Mankoff (1/17/2000)

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25

afraid anxiety astronauts boss businessmen catching confronts earth employee executives fear flu general health irrational life medicine modern office paranoia paranoid people psychiatry psychology seasons space space-suited travel traveling winter workers 165842

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (1/17/2000)

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26

bearded captionless carriers century doom everybody hey makes man mistakes new possibly psychology reading refers religion religions religious robe sayer sign smooth software street sunglasses transition urban wearing y2k 165843

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You dont have any time? Try fitting


Taoist sex into your schedule.

Marisa Acocella (1/17/2000)

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27

buddhism cocktail discuss eastern gossip gossiping gossips life limitations modern parties party religions schedules sex tantra tao trends two urban woman women 165844

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Alex Gregory (1/17/2000)

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28

boat boats boats bottle bowsprit bowsprits bris captionless christening christens circumcision jews jibboom jibbooms judaism launching left man medicine mohel mohels off panel part prow rabbi rebbe religion religions right rulings sailboats sailing saws ships sports wine 165845

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Michael Maslin (1/17/2000)

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29

ambulance ambulances behind blaring cans dead death dying emergencies emergency general health just life marriage married medicine reads relationships resuscitated sickness sign siren strings trailing wedding-style 165846

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

It seems to me that ordination of women might


brighten the place up a bit.

Ed Fisher (1/17/2000)

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30

cathedral catholic catholicism catholics church churches clergy feminism general liberation life ministers modern priests religions talking two women womens 165847

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Bruce Eric Kaplan (1/17/2000)

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31

air alien aliens atmosphere but -creatures earth extra-terrestrials fiction flying food general leaves outer planet pollution restaurant restaurants review reviews saucer saucers saying science service space spaceship terrible travel ufos was were 165848

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I sold his unlisted phone number to telemarketers.

William Haefeli (1/17/2000)

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32

couple couples divorce divorced divorces divorcing domestic ex-boyfriend's fights friend general gloves husband husbands life marital marriage married matrimony men modern off relationship relationships revenge she's sold taking technology telemarketers telephones tells wife wives woman women 165849

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Danny Shanahan (1/17/2000)

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33

babies baby beckett beginners black captionless child children comedy dark diapers drama fists general godot humor into irish kid kids literature play playing plays samuel sit stage theater theatre their thumbkin thumbs titles tucked two waiting young youth 165850

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

People shouldnt get married unless theyve


been married.

Richard Cline (1/17/2000)

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34

another bar bars been couple couples divorce divorced divorces divorcing domestic drinking general husband husbands life man marriage married matrimony men modern one relationship relationships sit talks wife wives 165851

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im in the mood for some good Egyptian food, too. But who
in the neighborhood would know of a good place to go?

Sam Gross (1/17/2000)

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35

ancient cook cooking corner creatures cuisine dining eat eating food griffin history looking man meal meals menu menus mood mythological mythology order ordering orders restaurant restaurants rounding service sphinx urban waiter waiters woman 165852

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If Id known shopping could be this easy, I would


have dressed up as a cop ages ago!

Michael Crawford (1/17/2000)

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36

ave bags buy buying consume consumer consumerism consumers cop cops costume costumes customer customers department dress general impostors men people police policemen retail sale sales shop shopper shoppers shopping shops store stores two urban walk 16585 3

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!
Oh, its only you.

Jack Ziegler (1/17/2000)

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37

animals barn corners door eeee frighten frightening general psychology scared scary scream spider spiders two web webs yell 165854

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh God, I forgot to ask if anybody had lard issues.

William Hamilton (1/17/2000)

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38

around chef chefs cook cooking cuisine dining dinner eat eating fat food friends gathered group hostess issues lard leisure life modern parties party reveals she table used vegan vegans vegetarian vegetarians 165855

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

In flagrante delicto, indeed! You never miss


an opportunity to show off your classical
education, do you?
J.B. Handelsman (1/17/2000)

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39

adultery affair affairs angrily another bed bedroom classical college colleges coming couple couples discovers education enters home husband husbands in language latin love man marriage married matrimony relationship relationships replies scenes schools sex sexual show triangles universities university wife wives 165856

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its getting much harder for me to distinguish good from


evil. All Im certain about is whats appropriate and
whats inappropriate.

Edward Koren (1/17/2000)

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40

afterlife afterlives appropriate demons devil devils dilution discuss ethic ethics evil good hell legends life modern moral morality morals myths philosophy religion satan 165857

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Take away their Game Boys!

Gahan Wilson (1/17/2000)

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41

cages cell cells convict convicts dungeon entertainment gamer games guards inquisitors jail jails life masked medieval metal modern play prison prisoner prisoners prisons suspended technology times torture toy toys video 165858

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh, dear, Im afraid youve backed me into a corner.

Charles Barsotti (1/17/2000)

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42

alligators animal animals boss bosses business businessman businessmen cliche cliches corner corporate crocodile crocodiles executive executives expression expressions general law lawyer lawyers monster negotiations office offices problems professional professionals rabbit rabbits work working works 165859

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What sort of flowers say, I promise to obey


the restraining order?

Nick Downes (1/17/2000)

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43

abuse advice asks been boyfriend couple couples date dates dating divorce florist flowers general girlfriend girlfriends given life man odern order orders police problems relationship relationships restraining spousal stalkers stalking 165860

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (1/17/2000)

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44

panel about accordion again all apparently back bishop's blend boat brooklyn bruschetta captionless chast check chore chores citizens city college color connecticut course courses crack crackhead crash-landed day decided did different dinner domestic doodad eisenhower else etiquette find first flip fold folding folks front full-page god-fearing had hand hat have having housewives how install job just kidding kids ladies learn leave lesson lessons like line looking looks minute moving mudroom napkin napkin-folding napkins natives
never new next nice now once one out oven over page parties peculiar peel people piece planet pneumatic probably ready reappeared region regions register responsible rome roz seminar sensible shingling shows sign silk solid start state stick store story strip suburban suburbs terra-cotta then these this thought time title tried tuck tunisian upstanding very vials voil was we'll we're week were when who who's whole women would writer york 165861

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You have a choice of three-bean salad or lethal injection.

Mike Twohy (1/24/2000)

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45

asking cell cells choice convict convicts couple crime crimes criminal criminals death dining execution executions injection jail jails language lethal like meal meals menu menus order ordering orders play prison prisoner prisoners prisons restaurant restaurants service three-bean waiter waiters waitress waitresses what word would 165862

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I dont think this merger between the text


and the cartoons is working out.

Robert Mankoff (1/24/2000)

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46

america aol body business businessmen cartoon cartoons comment companies company corporate descends discuss executive internet into mergers online refers technology text them time two warner 165863

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This ones for not asking, and this ones for not telling.

Christopher Weyant (1/24/2000)

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47

army ask award awards chest clintons dont gay general generals guest guests homosexual homosexuality homosexuals medal medals men military mingle mingling parties party points policy refers social socialize socializing tell two women 165864

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Are you there now, Linda? Are you in that happy, safe place
that brings you peace and assurance, and deep contentment?

Gahan Wilson (1/24/2000)

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48

activity analyst analysts anger casket client couple couples dead death does domestic envisions funeral funerals herself husband husbands hypnosis images marriage married matrimony mental over patient patients psychiatrist psychiatrists psychiatry psychologist psychologists psychology relationship relationships safe session standing therapist therapists therapy visualization wife wives woman young 165865

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im getting esophagus notes with a bouquet of red and


white blood cells and a bitter spinal-cord aftertaste.

Paul Wood (1/24/2000)

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49

aftertaste analyze animal animals blood bone bones cook cooking cuisine devour dining eat eating fine flavor food hunter language lion lions male meat one play savanna talking tigers two wildebeest wine word would 165866

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (1/24/2000)

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50

acquisition acquisitions also america aol aols box brand brands bros business cable cartoon city cnn com companies company compuserve computers corporate digital e-mail entertainment fortune got group hbo home icq illustrated instant internet long looney magazine mail man marketing mergers message messenger moviefone music netscape network news office online people reads refers server spinner sports tbs television time time-warner tnt tunes warner web weekly winamp youve 165867

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Then invite them. No one likes them, but


every salad needs a little vinegar.

Richard Cline (1/24/2000)

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51

argument arms behind clichs concedes condiment crossed dressing fixing general guest guests husband invitation invitations invite language list mingle mingling mirror parties party play relationships salad social socialize socializing stands tie vinegar wife word 165868

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I can get you to San Francisco through Dallas via Atlanta,


but wed have to take a kidney right here and now.

Danny Shanahan (1/24/2000)

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52

airplane airplanes airport airports businessmen counter demand doctor doctors donate exchange flight fly flying greet here hospitals kidneys operation operations particular passenger passengers patient patients physician physicians plane planes surgeon surgeons surgery ticket travel 165869

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Been there. Done him.

Marisa Acocella (1/24/2000)

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53

bar bars boyfriend cocktail cocktails cosmopolitans couple couples date dates dating drink drinking drinks fashionable general girlfriend girlfriends gossip gossiping gossips life modern play relationship relationships sex sexual two women word 165870

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We tried six speakers, then twelve, and finally we put in the


Pittsburgh Symphony, yet we still feel something is lacking.

J.B. Handelsman (1/24/2000)

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54

another band bands can classic classical communities community concert concerts conductor conductors couple electronics entire home homes house household households houses incompetents inside instrument instruments lack lacking life man modern music musicians neighbor neighborhood neighborhoods one orchestra outside perform performance performances players playing record residential residents see sheet sheets stand stereo stereos suburban suburbs symphonies symphony talking their woman 165872

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Now, before I give my pat answer, does anyone else


have any dumb questions?

Bruce Eric Kaplan (1/24/2000)

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55

answers board business businessman businessmen chairman conference conferences corporate dumb executive executives head meeting meetings office offices others pat professional professionals questions table work working works 165873

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Peter Porges (1/24/2000)

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56

animal animals birds branches buzzards captionless dead death die gathered hammock hammocks have lazy leisure man near newspapers notices over reads relax relaxing rest rural six suburbs vulture vultures 165874

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Whats cool about this guy is that hes one-hundredper-cent idea-free!

Edward Koren (1/24/2000)

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57

affection another attraction boyfriend boyfriends cool couple couples date dates dating describes discussing free friend girlfriend girlfriends hairy he's idea ideas intelligence introductions large love men relationship relationships romance romantic what's woman women 165875

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Am I too late to loot the dead?

Frank Cotham (1/24/2000)

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58

approaches coffin coffins cries crime crimes criminal criminals cry crying cup death funeral funerals grave grubby large man mourners over overcoat parlor rob robber robbers robbery sack shoulder steal theft tin weeping 165876

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Whats your problem, Chloe? My client loved


this presentation.

Stuart Leeds (1/24/2000)

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59

advertising bed bedtime book books business businessman businessmen career careers child children client clients corporate daughter executive executives families family general kid kids mom moms mother mothers night office offices parent parents presentation problems professional professionals read reading reads sleep son sons story work working works young youth 165877

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Edward H. Allison (1/24/2000)

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60

dirt earth environment evolution ground history horizon line long nature planet prehistoric ruled science shining sky soil sun theoretical theories theory time treeless universe when 165878

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The country grandpa came from was a stinking hellhole of


unspeakable poverty where everyone was always happy.

David Sipress (1/24/2000)

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61

battery children culture cultures deck economies economy emigration ferry foreign general generation generations grandchild grandchildren granddaughter granddaughters grandfather grandfathers grandparent grandparents grandson grandsons happy hellhole immigrants park poverty 165879

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (1/24/2000)

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62

always bang becomes been big bigger caves cooking cosmology domestic everything fantasticks faux first fix forth gets gross know made mess mistake nicely nothing origin origins other pas philosophies philosophy physics psychiatry psychology puffs recipes science socialize socializing souffl teensy than the theatre then theoretical theories theory there thing trying universe whole will 165880

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Remember when I said I was going to be honest


with you, Jeff? That was a big, fat lie.

Leo Cullum (1/24/2000)

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63

another attorney boss bosses business businessman businessmen client corporate ethics executive executives fire firing honest honesty lies lying management office offices professional professionals work working works 165881

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Am I the only guy at this table who goes back to when this
stuff was two hundred and fifty dollars a bottle?

William Hamilton (1/24/2000)

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64

age alcohol discuss drinking economy expensive general money people prices restaurant restaurants rich riches several tax taxes wealth wealthy wine wines 165882

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Arnie Levin (1/24/2000)

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65

ancient arm arthur character characters cliche cliches control controller excalibur history holding king lady lake literature man medieval out remote remotes rising sees stories story television walk were 165883

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Am I the smart one and youre the pretty one or is it


the other way around?

Barbara Smaller (1/24/2000)

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66

age aging attraction bench benches cliche cliches coats elderly expression expressions family flirt flirting flirts generation generations hats incompetents old park pretty problems senior seniors sisters smart two winter wrapped 165884

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Instead of killing the whale for its blubber, were


going to do a little lipo.

Alex Gregory (1/24/2000)

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67

animal animals blubber boat cosmetic distance diving eskimo fishing five hospitals hunter hunters inuit liposuction operation operations paddle surgeon surgeons surgery tail visible whales whales 165885

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sorry, Sylvia, but your mothers long-term care has been


going on just a little bit too long.

Jack Ziegler (1/24/2000)

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68

age aging assassins bump care crime criminals death door elderly fitness four front generation generations guns health hmo insurance long-term mafia medical mother off old patient patients rifles senior seniors show womans 165886

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jules Feiffer (1/24/2000)

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69

board boss business chairmen collar corporate depression employee employer employment executives members occupation office profession professional sad unhappy white work 174409

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its a little game we play called Who wants to be a survivor?

Tom Cheney (1/31/2000)

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70

age another around caveman cavemen chase desert explains game games group hit millionaire new observer prehistoric refers rock show shows stone survivor television wants who 165887

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (1/31/2000)

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71

beach beaches celebriies children clinton digging head heads lewinski lewinsky linda makeover media monica news ocean oceans plastic politics refers remains sand scandal scandals sea seas seashore seashores shore shores stumble summer surgery swimming tripp tripps upon washington while 165888

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Stuart Leeds (1/31/2000)

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72

audiences cinema cinemas cliche cliches closure couple couples end expression expressions film films general instead language leaving life modern movie movies people play psychiatrists psychologists relationship says theatre word 165889

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Edward? Can I play with your stuff?

William Hamilton (1/31/2000)

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73

another boss bosses business businessman businessmen cars childishness corporate decorating desk desks elaborate executive executives general management office offices one play professional professionals stuff toy toys work working works 165890

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Did he have any distinguishing characteristics besides


a strong sense of entitlement?

Bruce Eric Kaplan (1/31/2000)

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74

anger arrogance being cop cops couple crime crimes criminal criminals elderly entitlement general law mugged officer police policeman report rob robber robbers robbery steal theft 165891

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I hate my nose.

Frank Cotham (1/31/2000)

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75

appearance appearances beat beatniks bulbous coffee complains counter ego fashion fitness friend general generation hate hippies life modern nose pierce pierced piercing restaurants ring rings service shop style styles three trend trends urban warty woman 165892

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I figure we can blue-screen the kids in later.

Alex Gregory (1/31/2000)

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76

adding another big blue blue-screen camcorders camera cameras child children dad dads daughter daughters effects families family father fathers general image kid kids looks matte mattes mom moms mother mothers movies one other parent parents process relationships screen shot skeptically son sons special special-effects takes technology television toys tricycle video wheel wife young youth 165893

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ladies and gentlemen, start your companies!

Warren Miller (1/31/2000)

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77

automobiles boss bosses business businesspeople career careers competition computers desks employee employees employer employers entrepreneurs executives full general internet job jobs management numbered occupation occupations office offices phones profession professions race races racetrack sitting sports start work worker workers working works 165894

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

My bill isnt terribly controversial. It would provide modest


tax breaks for people who dont really need them.

J.B. Handelsman (1/31/2000)

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78

civil cocktail congress controversial general government governments incompetents latest legislation money need official parties party people political politician politicians politics president presidents rich senate taxes washington woman 165895

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Peter Steiner (1/31/2000)

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79

animals cliche cliches domestic expression expressions face its language look moron morons ox oxen oxymoron phrase phrases play stupid word 165896

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its an amazing coincidence, isnt it, that we all


served on the same board of directors?

James Stevenson (1/31/2000)

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80

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ive been fired, but they let me keep my secretary.

Al Ross (1/31/2000)

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81

arrives boss bosses briefcase business businessmen career careers coming employee employees employer employers fire fired firing general hand home husband husbands incompetents job jobs occupation occupations office one over profession professions secretaries shoulder slung unemployed unemployment work worker workers working works 165898

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

No, no, no! Youre, like, I really, really, really love you,
and youre, like, Whatever.

Mick Stevens (1/31/2000)

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82

act acting actor actors actress actresses acts auditions auditorium direction directions director directors generation language life like modern play plays reading really slang stage teenagers theatre two whatever young 165899

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (1/31/2000)

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83

always american analyzed anyway become big-brand big-city bologna boys bread but cafeteria care cheese child children condiment condiments cuisine deconstruct deconstructing democratic democrats diagrams didnt dining easy-to-chew eat eating families family food general happy health ill its itself just kids kind kosher lettuce liberal look love lunch may mayo meal meals means menu menus mistake mormon mormons normal not other parents parents party people politics radical religion republicans reveals said sandwich
sandwiches say school schools slice taste teachers their there theres us values want were what whole-wheat 165900

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Youre only making this harder on yourself, Powell.

Danny Shanahan (1/31/2000)

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84

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Alex Gregory (1/31/2000)

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85

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Thats porkthe meat of the pig. It makes an excellent


substitute for tofu.

David Sipress (1/31/2000)

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86

butcher butchers consumerism cuisine customer delicatessens describes fitness food foods general groceries health market meat meats pigs pork shopping shops stores substitute tofu vegan vegans vegetarian vegetarians 165903

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Long time no see!

Gahan Wilson (1/31/2000)

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87

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Have you anything to say before I change your channel?

Charles Barsotti (1/31/2000)

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88

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

My parents are at the age where theyre very


involved with their own activities.

Barbara Smaller (1/31/2000)

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89

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

GOTHAMS WINTER WONDERLAND (1 of 4)

The Druidic Polar Bear Club

Arnold Roth (1/31/2000)

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90

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

GOTHAMS WINTER WONDERLAND (2 of 4)

Ice Fishing

Arnold Roth (1/31/2000)

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91

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

GOTHAMS WINTER WONDERLAND (3 of 4)

Ski Central Park

Arnold Roth (1/31/2000)

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92

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

GOTHAMS WINTER WONDERLAND (4 of 4)

Learn Tracking

Arnold Roth (1/31/2000)

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93

blizzard boy city cold fish food foods fresh ice manhattan neighborhoods new nyc regional scouts seasonal seasons shop shopping ski skier skiing snow snowfall snowing snowstorm sports urban winter york 174414

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

In the interest of cultural diversity, weve hired Jason,


here, who owns a number of hip-hop CDs.

Alex Gregory (2/7/2000)

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94

blacks board boss bosses business businessman businessmen compact conference conferences corporate director discs diversity employee employees executive executives hip-hop introduces management meeting meetings music new office offices other people personnel phonograph pop professional professionals racial rap records room trends white work working works young youth 165908

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You cant be insured, Harry and Louise, because of


your prexisting condition.

J.B. Handelsman (2/7/2000)

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95

anti-universal-health-care commercials couple coverage down fitness health insurance insured medical pre-existing television turned 165909

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

They should just ask Elin Gonzlez who he wants to be when


he grows up, Gloria Estefan or the Buena Vista Social Club.

Victoria Roberts (2/7/2000)

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96

actor actors celebrities child children cuba debacle discussing fame famous film films foreigners general grow immigrant immigrants kid kids media movie movies news parents scandal scandals sidewalk solution son sons stand two washington young youth 165910

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Go ask your search engine.

John Caldwell (2/7/2000)

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97

ask before book boys children computers dad families family fathers help homework incompetents internet life modern reading research search son sons standing student students technology web young youth 165911

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sorry, Maam. Down only.

Arnie Levin (2/7/2000)

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98

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Daddy doesnt have a job. Daddy goes to the gym.

David Sipress (2/7/2000)

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99

armchair bodybuilder bodybuilders boy career careers child children dad dads exercise exercises exercising families family father fathers fitness gym gymnasiums gyms health job jobs kid kids man muscle muscles muscular occupation occupations parent parents son sons unemployed unemployment very work worker workers working works young youth 165913

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Grace and polish, all bundled up together in one man?

Victoria Roberts (2/7/2000)

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100

beau booth boyfriend bundled couple couples date dates dating discussing general girlfriend girlfriends husband husbands love marriage married matrimony men new polish relationship relationships restaurant restaurants sit talking two wife wives womans women 165914

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You have to admire his professionalism.

Frank Cotham (2/7/2000)

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101

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its your grandparents, claiming their visitation rights.

J.B. Handelsman (2/7/2000)

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102

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Do you want to see where I fester?

Bruce Eric Kaplan (2/7/2000)

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103

apartment apartments boyfriend building couple couples date dates dating fester general girlfriend girlfriends language man outside play problems relationship relationships scenes social street urban woman womans word 165917

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

To our divorcespowerful tools of capital formation.

Edward Koren (2/7/2000)

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104

capital couple couples divorce divorced divorces divorcing domestic general glasses husband husbands marriage married matrimony money one proposes relationship relationships restaurants toast toasts tools two wife wine wives woman women 165918

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Could we be getting a little too museum-quality?

William Hamilton (2/7/2000)

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105

casual clothes collector collectors commission commissioned commissions couple elaborate general hanging look museum-quality museums neoclassical painting paintings parlor patron patronage patrons people rich their 165919

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (2/7/2000)

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106

analyst composer composers couch daddys george gershwin good looking lyrics mommas more musical musicals patient patients psychiatrist psychiatrists psychiatry psychologist psychologists psychology rich session song songs therapist therapists therapy want what your 165920

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sometimes I sell puts. Other times I sell


calls. Its a full life.

Richard Cline (2/7/2000)

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107

bar bars brokers businessmen calls career careers couple flirtations general job jobs life love man market money occupation occupations pickups puts scenes stock stocks talking work worker workers working works 165921

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Dont sweat the Castilian pronunciation.

Alex Gregory (2/7/2000)

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108

castilian cuisine culture cultures dining dont drive-thru driver eat eating fast food foreign incompetents joes language languages loco low male mexico order ordering orders passenger pronunciation spanish sweat taco woman 165922

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hey, what do you say we just skip Valentines Day this year?

Robert Weber (2/7/2000)

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109

age couple couples fights general holiday holidays husband husbands looking love man marital marriage married matrimony older out relationship relationships romance skip suit valentines wife window wives 165923

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We grind our own catnip.

Mischa Richter (2/7/2000)

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110

catnip cats chef chefs cook cooking cuisine doeuvres dining dinner eat eating food general guest guests hors mingle mingling offering parties party social socialize socializing talking 165924

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Have you folks been menued yet?

Bernard Schoenbaum (2/7/2000)

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111

anger annoyed-looking booth couple cuisine dining eat eating food general hunger hungry language maitred meal meals menu menus order ordering orders play restaurant restaurants service waiter waiters word 165925

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Have I got a girl for you!

Gahan Wilson (2/7/2000)

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112

affection attraction background cocktail collar dominatrix fashion flirt flirting flirts girl guest guests hand heels introduce introduces introduction introductions leather love male man mask mingle mingling parties party romance romantic sadomasochism sex sexual shackles shakes social socialize socializing spike submissive suit torture whip zipper 165926

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The Governor has granted a stay of execution until


your Benetton ad comes out.

Peter Steiner (2/14/2000)

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113

ad ads advertising attorney attorneys brand brands brings capital cell cells client clients controversial convict convicts criminal criminals death depicting ethics executions general inmate inmates jail jails label labels lawyer lawyers new news prison prisoner prisoners prisons punishment refers row 165928

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Harry Bliss (2/14/2000)

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114

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ill be right backIm going to blink.

Michael Maslin (2/14/2000)

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115

blink boyfriend break contact couch couple couples date dates dating explains eye general girlfriend girlfriends hands holding love lovers man men relationship relationships right scenes women 165929

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Give me moderation or give me death!

Frank Cotham (2/14/2000)

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116

american campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates civil congress death elect election elections gives government governments henry liberty moderation official patrick platform podium political politician politicians politics president presidents revolution senate speech speeches 165930

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

When we were together, he was always singing It Had


to Be You. Then, suddenly, he switched to I Gotta Be
Me, and I havent seen him since.

Warren Miller (2/14/2000)

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117

another couple couples divorce divorced divorces divorcing domestic good home husband husbands leaving lyrics marriage married matrimony middle-aged one photographs picture problems relationship relationships see seeing seen side song songs speaks table wife wives woman 165931

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Be still, my atrial fibrillations!

George Booth (2/14/2000)

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118

age atrial binoculars bustling checks cliche cliches elderly expression expressions fitness guest guests health heart hearts man neighbor neighbors out phrase phrases porch sidewalk visitor visitors woman 165932

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (2/14/2000)

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119

captionless desert general island magazine magazines man media ocean oceans periodical periodicals publication publishing reads rescue self shipwrecked stranded 165933

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (2/14/2000)

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120

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I may only be in promotion, but I have


seen the knives in the night.

Richard Cline (2/14/2000)

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121

boyfriend cliche cliches cocktail couple couples date dates dating dream dreams expression expressions girlfriend girlfriends guest guests knives man mingle mingling night parties party pensively phrase phrases promotion psychic relationship relationships says sits social socialize socializing woman 165935

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sadly, no food was produced after they all


became motivational speakers.

Benita Epstein (2/14/2000)

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122

addressing archeologists farmers food front guide leisure motivational pyramid speeches tour tourism tourist tourists travel traveling travels trip trips two unfinished vacation vacations 165936

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Next week is out. Ill be in Houston


merchandising my pain.

Michael Crawford (2/14/2000)

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123

bed blanket books couple couples face-down front general husband husbands lie man marriage married matrimony merchandising money open pain relationship relationships texas them together travel wife wives woman writers 165937

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im the lot of baggage he comes with.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (2/14/2000)

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124

age baggage been confronts couple couples elderly fights flirting general guest guests husband husbands introduce introduces introduction introductions marital marriage married matrimony mingle mingling parties party psychiatry psychology relationship relationships social socialize socializing wife wives woman younger 165938

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I admire your enthusiasm forwell, paint and,


you know, canvas.

James Stevenson (2/14/2000)

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125

admire artist artists artists businessman collector collectors commission commissioned commissions conservative enormous enthusiasm looking paint painters paintings patron patronage patrons shaggy speaks stand studio 165939

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I dont know. Im something of a technophobe.

Alex Gregory (2/14/2000)

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126

arms caveman cavemen club clubs folded hands holding inventions know might one other prehistoric salesman technology technophobes two 165940

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You set em up with one of these babies, and theyre


good for the night.

Gahan Wilson (2/14/2000)

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127

alcohol alcoholic alcoholics another bar bars bartender bartenders blood bottle bottles cocktail cocktails customer drink drinking drinks drunk drunks em general have hospitals inebriated intoxicated intravenous liquor one pub rack says sets tavern taverns them were 165941

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

All too human is fineunless, of course, its all too often.

William Hamilton (2/14/2000)

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128

advertising campaign campaigns cliche cliches end expression expressions general headquarters human man often phrase phrases political politicians speaks table workers 165942

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ive found that there are times in a persons


spiritual journey when prescription drugs
are entirely appropriate.
Barbara Smaller (2/14/2000)

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129

age another appropriate cure cures drugs exercise gym health journey locker medicine new one pill pills prosaic room rooms spiritual woman women 165943

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We dont much go in for the Stockholm syndrome around here.

Peter C. Vey (2/14/2000)

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130

box chocolates cliche cliches damned day devil devils expression expressions heart-shaped hell love mans offer peace phrase phrases pitchfork refuses valentines 165944

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

MISDEMEANORS OF THE HEART

Jules Feiffer (2/14/2000)

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131

argue arguing argument breakups deaf dispute fight fighting hear hearing problem problems quarrel quarreling relationships 174415

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Really, Im fine. It was just a fleeting sense of


purposeIm sure it will pass.

Tom Cheney (2/21/2000)

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132

all attacks businessmen career careers chest clutches coworkers drops employee employees gather general hallway hes heart job jobs language life man management modern occupation occupations office papers play purpose right see stack word work worker workers working works 165947

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Simply put, Marcia, I want to be your President.

Mick Stevens (2/21/2000)

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133

campaigning candidates couch couple couples door gets husband husbands knee man marriage married matrimony men one politics presidential proposals relationship relationships secret service sitting stand two wife wives woman 165948

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Well, J.B., were not a successful Internet company


because were not an Internet company.

Peter C. Vey (2/21/2000)

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134

another boss bosses business businessman businessmen computer conference conferences corporate executive executives incompetents management meeting meetings office offices one professional professionals successful technology web work working works 165949

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

End of February, McIntosh. Time to think about


our spring plantings.

Jack Ziegler (2/21/2000)

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135

calendar cell cells convict convicts criminal criminals garden gardener gardeners gardening gardens general houseplant houseplants ironic irony jail jails men nature plant planting plants prison prisoner prisoners prisons season seasons seed seeds spring time two 165950

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mike Twohy (2/21/2000)

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136

all beggars bum bums campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates captionless civil cup election elections fiance fiances general government governments holds homeless it money official platform political politicians politics president presidential presidents primaries saying sign signs spent street tin tramp tramps washington 165951

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sam Gross (2/21/2000)

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137

animals audience audiences bearing cat cats crap critic criticism critics critique crowd crowds general himself images inscription language large mental mice monument monuments mouse pest pet pets rat rats reads sculptor sculptors sculpture sculptures statue statues thinks what 165952

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Old is when your daughter announces shes


seeing a younger man.

William Hamilton (2/21/2000)

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138

age aging bar boyfriend child children club clubs couple couples dad dads date dates dating daughter daughters discuss families family father fathers girlfriend girlfriends kid kids late-middle-aged men mens middle-age mom moms mother mothers parent parents relationship relationships son sons three trophy wives women young youth 165953

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This is so cool! Im flying this thing completely


on my Palm pilot!

Mick Stevens (2/21/2000)

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139

airline airplanes assistants cockpit commercial computer computers cool digital flight fly flying general handheld one operating pdas personal pilot pilots plane planes technology two 165954

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ideally, husbands should be spaced at least


three years apart.

Barbara Smaller (2/21/2000)

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140

between boutique clothing couple couples discuss discussing divorce divorced divorces divorcing domestic husband husbands ideal marriage marriages married matrimony men number relationship relationships spaced two upscale wife wives women 165955

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

That dead person is still on our lawn.

Peter C. Vey (2/21/2000)

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141

book crime crimes criminal criminals dead death domestic home homes house lawns life looking man modern out problems reading sofa suburb suburban suburbs wife window yard yards 165956

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hes long gone, sheriffyoull never catch him.

Charles Barsotti (2/21/2000)

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142

animals bandit catch civilian cowboys crime crimes criminal criminals distant inches other rob robber robbers robbery several slow snail snails steal talking theft three two westerns 165957

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hell have abandonment issues.

Nick Downes (2/21/2000)

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143

abandonment aunt babies basket bible biblical bulrushes character characters children claims elian general gonzales into issues moses mosess mother off parable problems psychiatrists psychologists refers relationships sends stories story 165958

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Those Ds are misleading.

Robert Weber (2/21/2000)

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144

boy card cards child children dad dads education explaining families family father fathers grade grades kid kids language misleading mom moms mother mothers parent parents report reports schools son sons teachers young youth 165959

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We can give you enough medication to alleviate the


pain, but not enough to make it fun.

Peter Steiner (2/21/2000)

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145

alleviate doctor doctors drugs enough exam examination examinations exams fitness fun general health hospital hospitals medical medication medicine narcotic narcotics pain painkillers patient patients physician physicians room tells wife 165960

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If I won forty-seven million dollars in the lottery,


I wouldnt change a thing. Not at first.

George Booth (2/21/2000)

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146

budget budgets change coffee dog dollar drooping finance finances head income incompetents lottery money over people poor relationships rich riches standing tells wealth wealthy what woman would 165961

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I think its overkill.

Arnie Levin (2/21/2000)

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147

accessories accessory animal animals collar collars fashion jewelry leather one overkill porcupines sadomasochism spikes spiky style styles think thinking trend trends two 165962

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Have you ever wanted something so bad that youd


actually save up the money to buy it?

Frank Cotham (2/21/2000)

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148

backwards baseball beat beatniks caps city crime crimes criminal criminals down etc generation guys hands hippies life modern money pockets rob robber robbers robbery save steal street theft two walking want 165963

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Victoria Roberts (2/21/2000)

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149

appear attractive automobiles before body buy buying captionless closer common consume consumer consumerism consumers customer customers department disorder general image may mirror mirrors more next objects people reads rear-view refers retail sale sales shop shopper shoppers shopping shops sign stands store stores than warning warnings woman 165964

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I dont know how to draw a mergeryoull have


to go back and kill them.

Tom Cheney (2/21/2000)

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150

acquisitions age art artist artists boss bosses business businessman businessmen cave cavemen charts companies company conference conferences corporate draw dwellers executive executives general graphs hunting kill meeting meetings men mergers office offices paints prehistoric professional professionals scene stone viewing work working works 165965

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Danny Shanahan (2/21/2000)

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151

author authors balloon bed bedroom book books city essay essays fiction finger fingers hands having hell hotel images khayyam lies life line literature mental modern moves moving novel novels omar publication publications publishing reads refers room rubaiyat scenes stories story the thought three tour tours twenty week where which wonders writ writer writers writes 165966

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Number Three, please step forward, rip open the


bag of garbage, and throw it around.

Michael Maslin (2/21/2000)

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152

animal animas cop cops crime five garbage identify line-ups lineup nature pest pests police precinct raccoons raiding suburban suspected throw throwing victim victims 165967

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Can Johnny come out and eat?

Eldon Dedini (2/21/2000)

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153

backward baseball big boy cap children doorstep eat fat fitness food friends kid kids large little mom obese people play son sons weight young youth 165968

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

No, sir, they dont come with the cubicleyou have


to order the cubicle separately.

Charles Barsotti (2/21/2000)

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154

boss bosses brings business career careers cubicle delivery employee employees employer employers employment general hire hires hiring interview interviewing interviews job jobs man management new occupation occupations office personnel profession professions resume resumes work worker workers working works 165969

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Listen. Its at the quiet moments like this that you


can actually hear the meter running.

Leo Cullum (2/21/2000)

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155

attorney attorneys billing budget budgets discuss dollar fees female finance finances income language lawyer lawyers male meter money office play quiet rich riches their wealth wealthy word 165970

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Marisa Acocella (2/21/2000)

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156

bedroom captionless carpal carpal-tunnel computers cyber dear e-mail fitness girlfriend have headache internet man medical net not receives relationships scenes sex sexual syndrome technology tonight web 165971

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im sorry, dear. I wasnt listening. Could you repeat


what youve said since weve been married?

Robert Mankoff (2/21/2000)

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157

age aged chair couch couple couples fights husband husbands ignore marital marriage married matrimony middle problems relationship relationships say saying sitting wife wives 165972

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im out of the closet but under the radar.

William Haefeli (2/21/2000)

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158

beer-drinking gay group homosexual homosexuality language man military mixed others out people play under word 165973

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Youre supposed to point the pop-ups at the kid!

Gahan Wilson (2/21/2000)

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159

annoyed bed book books boy child children dad dads families family father fathers illustrations incompetents kid kids night not parent parents pop-up problems read reading showing sleep small son sons young youth 165974

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Alex Gregory (2/21/2000)

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160

angeles autos business california car cities city couple desert headed hollywood know knowing l.a. la los miles nepotism read regional road says sign signs someone urban 165975

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (2/21/2000)

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161

als apartment apartments automobiles ball being book books breakfast changed chast chitchat coffee commemorating commemorative conditions consumer correspondence counter curriculum diner dust elevator elevators eternal everyday general hair hairstyle havent hold issue issues jam jar mail music new night oatmeal pickled prunes rent-controlled rind roz scaffolding service stamp stamps table telephones traffic watermelon years yorker 165976

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sure, it may be great for us, but its hell on the markets.

Christopher Weyant (3/6/2000)

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162

bear bears bed bedroom brokers budget budgets bull bulls business couple couples dollar economics economy finance finances income invest investing investment investments invests market money relationship relationships rich riches scenes sex stock stocks wealth wealthy 165977

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hes at that awkward age when


they can try him as an adult.

Robert Weber (3/6/2000)

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163

adolescent adolescents adults awkward child children crime criminals dad dads families family father fathers framed general kid kids life looking may modern mom moms mother mothers moxley murder parent parents photo refer son sons teen teens teen-agers teenager teenagers teens trials women young youth 165978

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Thats an excellent prescreened question, but before I give


you my stock answer Id like to try to disarm everyone with
a carefully rehearsed joke.

Alex Gregory (3/6/2000)

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164

auditoriums campaigns candidates debate debates general government governments jokes media podiums political politicians politics presidential press public rehearsal rehearse speaking speeches stage stock two washington 165979

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We found we really missed going to the theatre and eating


in nice restaurants, so we gave our kids away.

David Sipress (3/6/2000)

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165

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Doug Reina (3/6/2000)

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166

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sumo on Ice

Matthew Diffee (3/6/2000)

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167

apparently caption empty fallen frozen have holes ice just lake large nature puns skaters sports sumo through two winter wrestlers wrestling 165982

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Your metabolism is the envy of everyone at this party.

Edward Koren (3/6/2000)

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168

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im not trying to sell you anything, sir.


Im doing market research, and all I ask
is two or three hours of your time to
answer a few thousand questions.
J.B. Handelsman (3/6/2000)

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answers business census coffee consumer consumerism cup dismayed general holding households kitchen life man market modern phone polls questions research technology telephones while 165984

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

An interesting selection, Dad, yet essentially a


failureas you can see, Im still awake.

Mick Stevens (3/6/2000)

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170

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jehoshaphat! Look at that gait!

George Booth (3/6/2000)

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171

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We would like to be genetically modified to


taste like Brussels sprouts.

Sam Gross (3/6/2000)

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172

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (3/6/2000)

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173

avenue awning captionless cartoon cartoons corner drawing dude etc everything general generic jacket labels man marquee marquees movie movies passes past products reading scene shows signature signed signs some store storefront stores street taxi taxis theatre theatres title titles walking well window word 165988

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

A well-regulated militia being necessary to


the security of a free state, we need cheap,
available handguns.

Peter Steiner (3/6/2000)

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174

amendment american arms bear century city constitution consumer discuss era freedom gun guns laws men militia policy politics revolution revolutionary right rights second two war 165989

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Weve been married a long time in Hollywood years.

Frank Cotham (3/6/2000)

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175

angeles convertible couple couples divorce dog families freeway general husband husbands l.a. la life los marriage married matrimony men modern morality palm relationship relationships tree-lined trend trends wife wives women year years 165990

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Know what we do with nosy little creeps like you?


We deprive them of their broadband data connections
to the rest of the world, thats what we do.

Michael Crawford (3/6/2000)

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176

chinatown computers crime criminals famous film films internet jack knife life mafia mans mobster modern movie movies nicholson nose nose-cutting parody polansky scene switchblade technology thug thugs web 165991

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (3/6/2000)

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177

annoyed at bars being binge binge-drinking captionless coffee day drinking fads for general guy idiot life long man men modern myself next pierced punker reads really style styles such tattoo tattooed tattooing tattoos trend trends wake 165992

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

To Hillaryand politicians without borders!

William Hamilton (3/6/2000)

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178

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (3/6/2000)

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179

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hi there, big guy!

Gahan Wilson (3/6/2000)

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180

animals apartment aquariums big business businessman businessmen coat comes coming corporate executive executives fish greets guy hangs hat home husbands man men office offices pet pets professional professionals shark sharks work working works 165995

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Bruce Eric Kaplan (3/6/2000)

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181

alone captionless enough fallen falls forest heard images mental nature philosophies philosophy sayings should suppose thinks tree trees woods 165996

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

J.C. Duffy (3/6/2000)

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182

annoying answer arrest as ask asks behind box catchphrases celebrities celebrity chaplain cleaner cleaners color confident crime death drawing dry duffy entertainment executions fame famous feeling final friend game general gun guns handcuffs handguns he into is leisure life lifeline like lunch man meal menu millionaire modern money murder philbin phone police popular pretty prison prisoners program programs refers regis row saying says shoots show shows sits six-panel station table television televisions title trial tv tvs
under use waitress walk wants witness woman would 165997

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Some guys from the state board of medicine are


here to see you.

Robert Mankoff (3/13/2000)

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183

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hes coming across as Reaganish but not Reaganesque.

William Hamilton (3/13/2000)

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184

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Well if I cant be a cowboy Ill be a lawyer for cowboys.

Barbara Smaller (3/13/2000)

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185

adults boy career careers child children confronts costume cowboys father have job jobs kid kids lawyers little occupation occupations son sons such usually work worker workers working works young youth 166000

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Will the role of wife call for any nudity?

Alex Gregory (3/13/2000)

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186

actors bride brides ceremonies couple couples groom grooms husband husbands marriage married matrimony minister naked nude nudity people relationship relationships role roles sex sexual speaks stand vow vows waiting weddings wife wives 166001

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sorry, Mr. Winsler was just let go. You may


finish his latt if youd like.

Michael Maslin (3/13/2000)

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187

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Tom Hachtman (3/13/2000)

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188

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

So we finally reach the summit of Everest, and whos


already there but that pushy sportswear buyer from
Bloomingdales, Tanya Urquhart.

Robert Weber (3/13/2000)

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189

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (3/13/2000)

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190

anger baking bare been bill blunt butter chef chefs chelsea chelsea's chicken clinton cook cookie cookies cooking cuisine destroy dining drop drown eat eating eggs favorite fights flour food hacked hands happy head hillary hillary's hurl incinerate insults into kitchen lettuce light marital now object pepper pieces pres pulverize recipe recipes red resentfully roaster rodham salad serves sheet six soda submission sugar teaspoonfuls tender then there toss until vinaigrette washington whack 166005

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

She turned out to be my kind of horse but


not my kind of woman.

Donald Reilly (3/13/2000)

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191

acropolis affairs ancient attraction boyfriend boyfriends centaurs couple couples creatures date dates dating down general girlfriend girlfriends greek greeks hill horses love myth mythical mythology relationship relationships roman sex talking two women 166006

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And, folks, if youll take a look out the right side of the
plane youll see a cloud that looks exactly like a pirate.

Matthew Diffee (3/13/2000)

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192

airline airplanes announcement announcer announcers attention clouds draws flight fly flying general look-alikes meteorology passengers pirate-shaped pirates plane planes transportation travel view 166007

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I begged him to get help.

Michael Crawford (3/13/2000)

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193

bar bars bartender bartenders been beg begged cowboys down fighting fights fretting general gunned guns help just man over problem problems psychiatrists psychologists pub saloon tavern taverns west 166008

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Why is it we never focus on the things


that unite us, like falafel?

David Sipress (3/13/2000)

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194

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I am going to SoHo. My doshas are all out of balance. Well, my


kapha is hunky-dory but my pitta and vata are out of whack.
Today the practitioner is going to get rid of all the stress with
geranium, ylang-ylang, bergamot, and patchouli, and, of
course, a little time in the steam tent.
George Booth (3/13/2000)

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195

age arm baths beauty bull chaired eastern elderly english fitness health husband life medical modern neighborhood neighborhoods new parlors pup relationships rug sits speaks steam stress woman yoga 166010

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Now youre going to be procrastinating with the big boys.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (3/13/2000)

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196

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And if youd like your artwork displayed please


include a brief bio.

Danny Shanahan (3/13/2000)

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197

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Well, I wouldnt eat any of it.

Charles Barsotti (3/13/2000)

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198

animal animals cat cats cuisine dining eat eating food general meal meals menu menus order ordering orders recommend recommendations restaurant restaurants seated service table talking waiter waiters 166013

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mind if I turn my hearing aid down?

Frank Cotham (3/13/2000)

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199

aid asks can dead deaf death die executions firing hearing man military noise noises shot sound squad 166014

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I was comped.

Pat Byrnes (3/13/2000)

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200

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

John OBrien (3/13/2000)

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201

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

It must be his beeper.

Mischa Richter (3/13/2000)

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202

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

My boyfriend is the son my parents always wanted.

William Haefeli (3/13/2000)

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203

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

PORTRAITGATE

Jules Feiffer (3/13/2000)

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204

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Lee Lorenz (3/20/2000)

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205

alan amazon banners brokers cisco com computer dancing economist federal greenspan internet market nude people reserve sites stock surrounded temptation the vixens waving web yahoo 166020

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

W.B. Park (3/20/2000)

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206

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im a Reagan Republican. Thats probably why


I smile and wave for no reason.

J.B. Handelsman (3/20/2000)

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207

arm conservative curiously government governments incompetents looking man political politicians politics pres refrigerator refrigerators ronald smile smiling table waving wife 166022

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Tom Cheney (3/20/2000)

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208

body boss bosses business businessman businessmen closet closets clothes clothing corporate empty executive executives fashion full general head heads life men mens modern obstacles office offices opens problems professional professionals psychology suit suits underwear work working works 166023

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Somehow, on you it doesnt look shavedit just


looks bald.

Barbara Smaller (3/20/2000)

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209

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Have you popped all those pills I prescribed?

Leo Cullum (3/20/2000)

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210

consults doctor doctors drug drugs exam examination examinations exams female fitness health hospital hospitals medical medicine office patient patients physician physicians pill pills 166025

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

My mind is especially empty today.

David Sipress (3/20/2000)

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211

buddhism eastern empty incompetents language meditating meditation mind monks religion religions two 166026

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Were thinking maybe its time you started getting some


religious instruction. Theres Catholic, Protestant, and
Jewishany of those sound good to you?

Robert Weber (3/20/2000)

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212

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You were hungry? Case dismissed.

Charles Barsotti (3/20/2000)

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213

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im sorry, dear, but you know how I feel about


intra-marital sex.

Danny Shanahan (3/20/2000)

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214

couple couples extra-marital fights husband husbands language living man marital marriage married matrimony play reading relationship relationships room sex sorry wife wives woman word 166029

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Is that your cell phone or are you


just glad to see me?

Donald Reilly (3/20/2000)

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215

arms around beepers call calling calls cell cellphone cellphones cells cellular communicate communicates communication communications couple couples dancing mae mobile partner phone phones portable relationship relationships slow technology telephone telephones west woman 166030

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (3/20/2000)

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216

age all back fred hang language let middle monument monuments out philpot play sculptor sculptors sculpture sculptures statue statues stuffed word 166031

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

She did only twenty-eight of the thirty-two


fouetts in the Black Swan pas de deux . . .
or are my eyes deceiving me?
George Booth (3/20/2000)

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217

ballet black castle dance dancers entertainment fouetts frankensteins general happening horror ice igor laboratory medieval monster monsters program programs scary scientist scientists show shows skater skaters skating sports swan television televisions tells times tv tvs watches whats 166032

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im sorry youre having a hard time, Roy. Please


forgive my Schadenfreude.

J.B. Handelsman (3/20/2000)

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218

another big commute commuter commuters commuting envy gloating grin happiness happy hard jealousy joy language malicious one paper passenger reading smile smiling train trains transit transportation 166033

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Bruce Eric Kaplan (3/20/2000)

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219

bubble captionless cartoons down everything head images ironic irony man mental modern normal over pedestrian pedestrians play ponder ponders psychology says street think thought thoughts usual usually walking whatever word 166034

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im hearing a lot of buzzwords from you, but Im


not getting a buzz.

Michael Maslin (3/20/2000)

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220

attraction buzz buzzwords cliches cocktail conversation conversations couch discussion discussions flirt flirting flirts guest guests language leisure man mingle mingling parties party slang social socialize socializing talk talking vocabulary woman 166035

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Pat Byrnes (3/20/2000)

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221

appearance appearances babies begins big butt butts clothes consumerism diaper diapers diets fashion figure figures front general images infant it look makes mental mirror psychology shape shapes shopping sits thinking this vanity weight 166036

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Instead of just sitting around, why dont you kids go


out and co-opt some black culture?

Alex Gregory (3/20/2000)

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222

adolescent african american blacks caucasian co-opt entertainment ethnic father floor general program programs race show shows society suburban teen teen-agers teenager teenagers teens television televisions tv tvs urban watching white 166037

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Peter C. Vey (3/20/2000)

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223

card cards day gay greeting greetings heterosexual holiday holidays homosexual homosexuality irish leans lesbian man opposed patricks pride section straight towards 166038

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

It has yet to turn a profit.

Alex Gregory (3/27/2000)

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224

afterlife afterlives angel angels angles boss bosses brokers budget budgets business businessman businessmen catholic catholicism christ christian christianity cloud clouds companies corporate down earth executive executives finance finances god heaven internet invest investing investment investments invests looking market money office offices planet prices professional professionals profit refers religion religious stock stocks two work working works 166039

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You look like this sketch of someone whos thinking


about committing a crime.

David Sipress (3/27/2000)

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225

approach black blacks cop cops crime criminals general man police policeman policemen profiling racial racist sketch street think thinking white 166040

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh, Julius, look! Its the first robin!

Mort Gerberg (3/27/2000)

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226

animal animals birds breaks calendar finish first line race races robins seasons sports spring through time win winner winners winning wins yard 166041

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Nobody told me about this!

Gahan Wilson (3/27/2000)

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227

animals cliff dead death die dying fall lemmings off push suicide talking tell themselves throwing told 166042

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Put that out! Its over. And lose the goatee.

Robert Mankoff (3/27/2000)

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228

alcohol ban bar bars bartender beards cigar cigarette cigarettes cigars cocktail cocktails drink drinking drinks end fashion general goatee liquor man off shave smoke smoker smokers smokes smoking tells tobacco trend trends 166043

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Heytruce? It looks like I might be fertile!

William Hamilton (3/27/2000)

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229

anger angry babies conceive couple couples fertile fights hand husband husbands man marital marriage married matrimony pregnancy relationship relationships sex sexual thermometer wife wives woman 166044

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its a new rent conceptfifteen minutes for a quarter.

Robert Weber (3/27/2000)

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230

agent agents apartment apartments being buyers cents change concept estate fiances finance general life living meter meters modern money parking potential price prices realtor rent renting room shown urban 166045

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I hate it when he gets all Robin Williamsy.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (3/27/2000)

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231

actor actors another celebrities comedian comedians comic comics discussing dog dogs entertainer entertainers entertaining entertainment entertains general impersonations people performer performers room talking two williams 166046

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Nothing against Rudy. I just feel that a woman


would be instinctively better on dairy issues.

Donald Reilly (3/27/2000)

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232

animals campaigns cattle clinton conversation cows dairy domestic farm farmer farmers farming giuliani governor governors hillary issues mayor new political politics regional rudolph talking two women york 166047

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Of course, we love you. Hasnt Maria told you?

Peter Steiner (3/27/2000)

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233

away boyfriend boyfriends communication couple couples date dates dating daughter daughters dinner father general girlfriend girlfriends governesses housemaid love maid maids mother nursemaids parents people problems relationship relationships rich servant servants table walking wealth wealthy 166048

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Crazy bastard thinks hes Napoleon.

Frank Cotham (3/27/2000)

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234

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Danny Shanahan (3/27/2000)

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235

above bed bedroom career careers character characters dwarfs fairy heard insomnia job jobs language literature occupation occupations open out scenes singing sleep sleeping snow songs stories story tales technology while white window work worker workers working works 166050

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its a Popemobile.

Sam Gross (3/27/2000)

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236

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Of course, now Im just a class clown, but eventually


Id like my own sitcom.

Barbara Smaller (3/27/2000)

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237

another child children class classes classroom classrooms comedian comedians comic comics educated educating education entertainer entertainers entertainment entertains general instructor instructors one performer performers playground program programs pupil pupils school schools show shows student students teach teacher teachers teaches teaching television televisions tv tvs 166052

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its Oscar timetheres that special tingle in the air.

George Booth (3/27/2000)

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238

academy actor actors actress actresses award awards bathtub cats cinema cinemas film films hollywood irons kitchen magic man media movie movies oscars people poor proclaims season surrounded television tingle while wife 166053

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Which should we go see: the straight romantic comedy


where the heroines best friend is a gay man, or the gay
romantic comedy where the heros best friend is a
straight woman?
William Haefeli (3/27/2000)

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239

boyfriend boyfriends cinema cinemas couple couples film films gay general homosexual homosexuality husband husbands life listings men modern movie movies newspaper relationship relationships review straight two 166054

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

May I buy you ladies a drink? I once rode in


an elevator with Ernest Borgnine.

J.C. Duffy (3/27/2000)

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240

attraction bar bars celebrities celebrity dropper duffy famous flirt flirtations flirting flirts geeky general guy have hits incompetents love name pickups scenes two what with working you 166055

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (3/27/2000)

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241

age big bliss bratty career careers chast children couple couples domestic ended failure fantasizes high hunky husband job jobs leaving likely lonely marriage married middle most now occupation occupations opportunity reject relationship relationships roz scene scenes school she shot shots shows student students succeed wedding where wife woman work worker workers working works writer yearbook yearbooks 166056

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Wow, thanks. Im a big fan. Ive downloaded all your stuff.

Jack Ziegler (4/3/2000)

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242

asks autograph case downloads entertainer entertainers entertainment entertains ethics fans guitar internet mp3 music musician musicians performer performers problems royalties sharing technology web 166057

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Dear J.J.: Thank you so much for your lovely present


of fourteen million dollars for my campaign. It was
sweet of you to remember. I promise to spend it on
something nice.

Mort Gerberg (4/3/2000)

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243

budget budgets campaigns children contributor donation donations ethics etiquette finance finances general letter letters manner manners money note notes political politician politicians politics rich riches wealth wealthy writes 166058

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its the editorial he was fulminating against when


he keeled over and croaked.

Robert Mankoff (4/3/2000)

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244

anger column couch croaked death editor editorials editors framed general husbands journalism journalist looking new news newspaper newspapers paper papers periodical periodicals pictures press publication publishing reporter reporters times two wall women york 166059

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ive decided to return to my first passion in


lifeselling drugs to kids.

Matthew Diffee (4/3/2000)

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245

age another business businessman businessmen career careers children conservative corporate course courses dealer dealers drugs employment executive executives general golf golfer golfers golfing golfs job jobs life man middle middle-aged occupation occupations office offices one passion profession professional professionals professions stand work worker workers working works yuppie yuppies yuppy 166060

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

By breaking the seal on this dress, you accept the terms


and conditions printed on my panties.

J.C. Duffy (4/3/2000)

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246

attempts bedroom boyfriend couple couples date dates dating duffy girlfriend girlfriends language man marital panties play relationship relationships scenes seal sex underwear unzip warning warnings womans word 166061

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Dont cry, Mom. Lots of parents have children who didnt


get into their first-choice college, and they went on to live
happy, fulfilled lives.

Barbara Smaller (4/3/2000)

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247

child children college colleges comforts cry crying dad dads educated educating education families family incompetents kid kids letter letters life mom moms mother mothers parent parents problems rejection school schools son sons student students tears teen teen-agers teenager teenagers teens universities university young youth 166062

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Like many large people, Benson moves with


remarkable grace.

Lee Lorenz (4/3/2000)

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248

big businessman businessmen corridor dancers dancing down fat fitness general heavyset large men people prancing them toward two walking weight 166063

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im not a miracle worker. I cant do the surgery


for less than four thousand.

Leo Cullum (4/3/2000)

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249

doctor doctors doctors dollar ethics fiance fiances hospitals miracle money office operation patient patients physician physicians price problems sitting surgeon surgeons surgery 166064

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Dont walk away from me while Im not paying


any attention to you.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (4/3/2000)

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250

argue argues arguing argument arguments couple couples fighting fights husband husbands leaving man marital marriage married matrimony older paper pay play problem problems reading relationship relationships room sofa walk wife wives woman word 166065

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Of course mating is natural. Its just not the kind


of thing you want to see your parents doing.

Peter Steiner (4/3/2000)

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251

animal animals birds child children couple couples crane cranes dad dads dance daughter daughters divorce divorced divorces divorcing domestic egrets families family father fathers flamingos general husband husbands kid kids look marriage married mate mating matrimony mom moms mother mothers natural offsprings parent parents relationship relationships ritual sex son sons storks two wife wives young youth 166066

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hes like this perfect combination of Oscar


de la Renta and Oscar de la Hoya.

William Hamilton (4/3/2000)

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252

boxer boxers boxing boyfriend caf clothes clothing combination converse couple couples date dates dating designers discussing fashion general girlfriend girlfriends hes men prizefighters relationship relationships restaurants style women 166067

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Edward Koren (4/3/2000)

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253

afterlife afterlives angel angels angles business cloud clouds concierge death desk etc fancy gates general halo heaven hotel hotels man marked pearly people peter play rich saint seraphim sitting st. suit surrounded trumpets were word 166068

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hey, baby, whats happenin? Hows about a little kiss,


mama? Woof, woof, woof! Ar-oooooooo!

Jack Ziegler (4/3/2000)

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254

attraction catcalls construction dog dogs flirt general happening harass hardhat life modern past pet pets poodle site taking urban walk woman workers workmen 166069

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Did you do that to be hurtful?

Alex Gregory (4/3/2000)

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255

anger argue argues arguing argument arguments arm couch couple couples domestic fighting fights guns hurtful husband husbands just man marital marriage married matrimony problem problems relationship relationships revolver shoot shooting shot violencce violent weapon weapons wife wives woman 166070

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Before we begin, may I ask which of you is the


good cop, and which is the bad?

Michael Maslin (4/3/2000)

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256

approach ask cliche cliches cop cops crime crimes criminal criminals general good interrogate interrogation language man officers police room two 166071

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Nothing from the governor, but I did manage to get


you a tax extension.

Danny Shanahan (4/10/2000)

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257

attorney attorneys cell cells client clients convict convicts criminal criminals death executions general jail jails lawyer lawyers prison prisoner prisoners prisons row taxes 166072

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Marjorie, Ive got something to tell you.

David Sipress (4/10/2000)

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258

boys cinema cinemas couple couples cry dont elderly film films gay general homosexual homosexuality husband husbands leave lesbian man marriage married matrimony movie movies relationship relationships showing something tell theater transvestites wife wives woman women 166073

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The following is a test of the fire-alarm system. It is only


a test. Please ignore the intense heat and combustion.

Robert Mankoff (4/10/2000)

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259

alarm alarms announcement announcements blares boss bosses business career careers communications employee employees employer employers executive executives fire ignore intense job jobs listens management occupation occupations office problems profession professions warning warnings work worker workers working works 166074

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

So, once again, we have agreed to disagree.

Gahan Wilson (4/10/2000)

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260

agree argue argues arguing argument arguments bible biblical catholic catholicism christ christian christianity churches clergy clergyman conversation conversations debate debates demon devil devils disagree discussion discussions evil god over priest priests problems religion religious satan sitting study table talk talking 166075

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Next thing we knew, he started subjecting us to all


this harsh, unfair criticism.

David Sipress (4/10/2000)

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261

bring cop cops criticism general guy harsh intellectual-looking language officers police policeman precinct two 166076

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And now, if I may, Id like to put You


on hold for a moment while I have a
few words with Mammon.

J.B. Handelsman (4/10/2000)

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262

bedside catholic catholicism christ christian christianity communications general god hold man materialism money pray prayer prayers praying prays religion religious speak telephones wants 166077

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Recess does things to a man.

Danny Shanahan (4/10/2000)

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263

attraction boy boyfriend children couple couples date dates dating educated educating education flirt flirting flirts general girl girlfriend girlfriends language moves playground playgrounds pupil pupils puts relationship relationships school schools student students 166078

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (4/10/2000)

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264

bill computer consumer consumerism convergence fortune friends future gates general goody hotline internet into listens merge message microsoft monopolies monopoly oh one over phone pseudo-science psychic software takes telephones tellers tv unit will woman 166079

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Well, youve brought me down to the sea again, to the lonely


sea and sky. Now will you take me back to Vegas?

Jack Ziegler (4/10/2000)

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265

beach beaches couple couples dune husband husbands journey journeys leisure man marriage married matrimony nevada ocean overlooking relationship relationships sand swimming tourism tourist tourists travel traveling travels trip trips vacation vacations wife wives woman 166080

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I cant understand a word youre saying, Roger.


Have you got a gun in your mouth?

Leo Cullum (4/10/2000)

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266

attempt business businessman businessmen communications desk doctor doctors exam examination examinations exams fitness general guns health hospital hospitals life medical modern patient patients phone physician physicians problems suicide telephones threat understand 166081

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I hate what weve become.

Lee Lorenz (4/10/2000)

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267

afterlife afterlives death demon devil devils eating giant hell people problems psychology satan two 166082

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I dont know about hair care, Rapunzel, but Im


thinking a good cream rinse plus protein conditioner
might just solve both our problems.

Michael Maslin (4/10/2000)

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268

appearance appearances balcony consumerism cosmetologist cosmetologists cosmetology cut cuts cutting down fairy frizzy hair haircut haircuts hairdo hairdos hairstyle hairstyles hang prince problems products salon salons shampoo shop shops style styles stylist stylists tales tower wont 166083

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sure I cant pop that in a bag for you, sir?

Michael Crawford (4/10/2000)

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269

apple apples art artists bag crawford face fruit groceries grocers grocery heads magritte man market markets michael offers over painters produce ren stand surreal surrealism worker 166084

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I dont pout when we invite people youve slept with.

William Hamilton (4/10/2000)

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270

boyfriend couple couples date dates dating deck discussing general girlfriend girlfriends guest guests house invite life mingle mingling modern parties party plans pout problems relationship relationships sex social socialize socializing 166085

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

In my day, people died.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (4/10/2000)

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271

age aging bench dead death die dying generation generations life man modern old park people scenes seniors woman 166086

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Good newsI got you into a terrorist camp.

Robert Weber (4/10/2000)

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272

boy camp camps child children dad dads desk doorway families family father fathers international kid kids life military modern mom moms mother mothers parent parents problems small smiling son sons standing summer summers terrorism terrorist vacation young youth 166087

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet.

Michael Shaw (4/10/2000)

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273

apartments away balance closet converse couple couples decorating decorations eastern fashion feng feng-shui home homes house houses husband husbands interior interiors life marriage married matrimony modern relationship relationships religion shui sofas trend trends tucked two wife wives women 166088

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What Im proposing, Ms. FennerGailis marriage.

Liza Donnelly (4/10/2000)

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274

attorney attorneys behind boardroom couple couples either end gathered general husband husbands lawyer lawyers life man marriage married matrimony meetings modern proposals proposes relationship relationships table their them wife wives woman 166089

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Alex Gregory (4/10/2000)

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275

barnow boasts brokers bumper captionless car career careers child children dad dads daughter daughters families family father fathers financial general huyck job jobs kid kids lawyers legal littman market mckenna mom moms mother mothers occupation occupations offsprings parent parents partner proud reads son sons sticker stickers stock stocks success work worker workers working works young youth 166090

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Anyone here named Hippity?

Charles Barsotti (4/10/2000)

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276

bar bars bartender bunnies bunny call calling calls communicate communicates communication communications ears easter four general men names one phone phones rabbit rabbits set sitting telephone telephones 166091

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And for a left-handed designated hitter and a player to be


named later, Mr. Steinbrenner would gladly fly Elin home.

Danny Shanahan (4/17/2000)

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277

athlete athletes baseball children cuba employee foreigners front-office general george gonzalez immigrant immigrants media new news owner owners press regional scandal scandals sports team teams telephone yankee yankees york young youth 166092

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its National Poetry Month, Marion, and by God


were gonna read some poetry.

David Sipress (4/17/2000)

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278

author authors book books coming essay essays fiction general home husband husbands into literature novel novels poem poems poet poetic poetry poets publication publications publishing read reading stories storms story wife writer writers 166093

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I cant imagine why we didnt think of this before.

Gahan Wilson (4/17/2000)

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279

bunny businessmen buy buying children christmas claus consume consumer consumerism consumers costumed customer customers department easter executives general holiday holidays lined mall retail santa season seasons shop shopper shoppers shopping shops smirk store stores tell think toys two visit want watch 166094

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And do you, Robert, mind if I smoke?

Peter C. Vey (4/17/2000)

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280

bride ceremonies ceremony cigarette cigarettes cigars couple couples during fitness groom husband husbands marriage married matrimony medical priest relationship relationships smoke smoker smokers smokes smoking tobacco vow vows wedding weddings wife wives 166095

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Your fluids are fine, but youve got a slow leak in your left tire
and a hidden explosive device in your right wheel well.

Michael Maslin (4/17/2000)

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281

automobiles bomb bombs checks family foreigners gasoline general mechanic mechanics obstacles problems repair repairs service stations terrorism tires vehicle weapon 166096

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Thats just so God.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (4/17/2000)

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282

anger angry-looking bible biblical catholic catholicism christ christian christianity church churches clergy clergymen couple couples down god gripes hallway language marriage married monastery monks older one priest priests relationship relationships religion religious two walking 166097

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I laughed so hard I almost scent-marked.

Danny Shanahan (4/17/2000)

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283

animals another bobcat bobcats cats cougars forest general humor joke jokes laugh laughed lions lynx mountain nature one problems scent-mark scent-marked talking through urinate walking woods 166098

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I know youre wired to respond to successful older men,


but what are you doing in the meantime?

Lee Lorenz (4/17/2000)

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284

attempts attraction bar bars bombshell boyfriend couple couples dame date dates dating disco fashion flirt flirtations flirting flirts general girlfriend girlfriends guy love meantime men older pick pickups relationship relationships scenes sex suit sunglasses trends wearing white women 166099

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sometimes I fear that wheat germ has been lost in


the health-food shuffle.

William Haefeli (4/17/2000)

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285

age bathrobes breakfast cereal consumerism eating food germ health man medical nutrition older porch problems shuffle sit their wheat woman 166100

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I know theres nothing wrong with the carburetor. Im just


interested in the stories it has to tell.

Michael Crawford (4/17/2000)

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286

automobiles car carburetors checking gasoline general hood husband mechanic mechanics repair repairs service stations stories under watch wife 166101

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Wed love to come, but we cant seem to find a sitter.

Mick Stevens (4/17/2000)

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287

babies baby-sitter babysitters behind boy child children couch dad dads daughter daughters devil-child devils families family father fathers horns kid kids mischief mom moms mother mothers parent parents problems relationships sitters small son sons tail telephone young youth 166102

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Uh-oh. The so-called marriage penalty.

Jack Ziegler (4/17/2000)

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288

alcohol alcoholic alcoholics bar bars cocktail cocktails couple couples doorway drink drinking drinks drunk drunks general husband husbands inebriated language liquor marriage married matrimony men one problems relationship relationships standing taxes two whos wife wives 166103

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I got my ticket for three dollars over the Internet. Are you
going to eat that salmon?

Leo Cullum (4/17/2000)

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289

airplane airplanes beat beatniks computers discount eat eating finance finances generation hippies internet meal meals money passenger passengers prices sale sales salmon status technology two wealth web 166104

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sam Gross (4/17/2000)

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290

bird birds dove doves general giant gun guns hangs life looking making miscellaneous modern nature nest nests outside peace proprietor shop sign signs spring standing store stores weapon weapons wooden 166105

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Remember the great cranberry scare of 59? And the


cellular phone hysteria of 93? Ralph Naders killer hot
dog with the nitrates? Our evacuation at Love Canal?
Remember the toxic-teeth scare, with the amalgam
fillings leeching mercury into our gullets? Oh, Wheeler,
kiss me now!

George Booth (4/17/2000)

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291

age aging band bands cellular couple cranberries dancer dancers dancing dogs emergencies emergency environment general hot jazz kiss love memories memory mercury nader nightclubs obstacles old pollution problems relationships reminisce romance scandal scandals scenes teeth telephones 166110

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hes interesting. But hes not Brazilian-bikini-wax interesting.

Marisa Acocella (4/17/2000)

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292

bathing bikini bikinis boyfriend brazilian cosmetics couple couples date dates dating discussing girlfriend girlfriends hair interesting men relationship relationships sex sexual shave sofa stylish suits talking two vanity wax women 166106

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

No, its just that the royal inbreeding makes


me look like a frog.

Pat Byrnes (4/17/2000)

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293

animal animals appearance appearances character characters england fairy families family frog frogs general inbreeding literature parent parents prince princes princess problems royalty sex sexual stories story tales talks 166107

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

O.K., right about now Ill bet youre thinking, Whats the catch?

Robert Mankoff (4/17/2000)

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294

adjoining benefits boss bosses business businessmen career careers catch chair doors down electric employee employees employer employers employment end executions fired hall hallway health hire hires hiring interview interviewing interviews job jobs life management marked modern occupation occupations office options past pension personnel plans problems profession professions resume resumes services stock think thinking unemployed unemployment walk work worker workers working works 166108

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Should we pick up something for the folks who


dont eat red meat?

Alex Gregory (4/17/2000)

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295

age caveman cavemen cook cuisine dining eat eating food general hunter hunters hunting mastodon mastodons out ponder prehistoric recently shopping slain spears sticking stone two vegetarians 166109

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I just hope we last long enough to get a turn at despising


some new people ourselves.

William Hamilton (4/17/2000)

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296

club clubs contempt country despise into journey journeys last lasting leisure members neighbor neighborhood neighborhoods neighbors new nouveau people pretentious rich riche settle surroundings their tourism tourist tourists travel traveling travels trip trips vacation vacations 166111

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (4/17/2000)

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297

chast couch domestic drama hear home homes house houses husband incompetents mystery noise noises paranoid problems psychology reading relationships roz sitting sound sounds sudden the think wife 166112

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

My name is Bunny, and Im a chocoholic.

Danny Shanahan (4/24/2000)

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298

addictions alcoholics animals anonymous attends bunnies candy chocoholic chocolate diet diets easter holidays legends meeting nutrition sugar 166129

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What was it this time, old economy or new economy?

Bernard Schoenbaum (4/24/2000)

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299

after blue brokers budget budgets career careers chip collapse collar comes coming couples dollar dramatic economics economy etc finance finances heated home households husbands income internet job jobs life man market modern money nasdaq new occupation occupations opposed rally recent refers rich riches stock stocks wealth wealthy white work worker workers working works 166130

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If I were money, youd listen to me.

Arnie Levin (4/24/2000)

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300

argue argues arguing argument arguments budget budgets cliche cliches communication couple couples dollar economics economy expression expressions fights finance finances households husband husbands ignoring income listen living marital marriage married matrimony money newspaper reads relationship relationships rich riches room sit wealth wealthy wife wives 166131

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Where are you going with this, Wingate?

Nick Downes (4/24/2000)

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301

board boardrooms boss bosses business businessman businessmen case chairman circus clowns conference conferences corporate etc executive executives general get-up grass helmet man meeting meetings nose office offices presentation presents professional professionals report reports ridiculous rubber skirt trombone trombones underwear winged work working works 166132

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Barbara Smaller (4/24/2000)

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302

black cemeteries cemetery complain complaints complianing dead death die dying grave graves gravestone gravestones graveyards headstone headstones humor reads why 166113

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This is my friend Ted, and this is Teds


lower-priced knockoff.

Mort Gerberg (4/24/2000)

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303

alike another clone clones clothing cocktail consumerism designer fashion friends guest guests identical introduce introduces introduction introductions knockoff labels leisure life look men mingle mingling modern money parties party prices shopping social socialize socializing style styles twins two woman 166114

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Well, as we thought, its something gross.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (4/24/2000)

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304

diagnosis disease diseases doctor doctors exam examination examinations exams gets gross health hospital hospitals illness medical medicine offices patient patients physician physicians sick sickness terminology thought woman 166115

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

O.K. guys, now lets go and earn that four hundred


times our workers salaries.

William Hamilton (4/24/2000)

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305

after boss bosses budget budgets business businessmen career careers corporate earn employee employees employer employers executive executives finance finances five greed income inspirational job jobs meeting meetings money occupation occupations office offices people profession professions rich riches salaries wealth wealthy work worker workers working works 166116

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Of course, were happy for you and Klaza, Beega.


But tell me, what do his people do?

Michael Crawford (4/24/2000)

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306

age anthropology ask become boyfriend boyfriends cave cavemen child children couple couples dad dads date dates dating daughter daughters engaged families family father fathers girlfriend girlfriends happy just kid kids mom moms mother mothers neanderthal parent parents person prehistoric relationship relationships son sons stone their whom young youth 166117

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Peter Steiner (4/24/2000)

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307

africa animals catch ethical exclaim fishing general hunt hunter hunters hunting lions make nature people person peta phil prey release remember safari tigers tourism tourists treatment two 166118

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

My attorney says your attorney had to take the


bar exam three times.

Leo Cullum (4/24/2000)

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308

argue argues arguing argument arguments attorney attorneys bar booth client clients couple couples divorce divorced divorces divorcing domestic education exam fighting fights general good husband husbands isnt law lawyer lawyers man marriage married matrimony problem problems relationship relationships restaurant restaurants say saying says school suggests wife wives woman 166119

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I regret to inform your lordship that I have


been offered, and have accepted, an attractive
position in valet parking.

Robert Weber (4/24/2000)

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309

aristocracy automobiles butler butlers career careers employee employees employer employers general informs job jobs master new occupation occupations parking people rich royalty salaries servant servants service titled valet work worker workers working works 166120

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Danny Shanahan (4/24/2000)

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310

agents be beepers beggar beggars begging begs bum bums business career careers cell cellular corner dressed employment fired food gripping hire hires hiring holding holds hollywood interview interviewing interviews job jobs life modern occupation occupations personnel phone poor rep representatives resume resumes says sign smartly stands street telephones unemployed unemployment well-dressed which will woman work worker workers working works 166121

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

My entire vision for the future


passed before my eyes.

Frank Cotham (4/24/2000)

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311

accident accidents aeroplanes airplane airplanes among apparently bruised campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates crash crashes election elections emergencies emergency general interviewed life news plane platform political politicians reporters survivors television transportation wreck wreckage wrecks 166122

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Matthew Diffee (4/24/2000)

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312

advertises all business buy buying clerk clerks consume consumer consumerism consumers customer customers department display displays finance general goods junk merchandise money off price prices rebates retail sale sales salesman salesmen saleswoman saleswomen shop shopper shoppers shopping shops sign store storefront stores window windows worthless 166123

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

So what if hes not the man of your dreams.


The Times is going to be there.

Michael Crawford (4/24/2000)

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313

bride bride-to-be brides ceremonies climbers day gets jitters journalism marriage new news newspaper newspapers paper papers periodical periodicals publication publishing social status times wedding weddings women york 166124

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Lee Lorenz (4/24/2000)

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314

amidst beggar beggars budget budgets cant cash dollar economy finance finances handle help income internet life mess millionaire modern money people rich riches sign sits street sudden wealth wealthy were white-collar worker yourself 166125

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (4/24/2000)

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315

accompanying amount bag balding billion brokers budget budgets bugle cares daily dollar doubt finance finances giant headline holding huge impressive income man market media mergers million money mustache news newspaper newspapers nobody not once paper papers periodical periodicals picture prices publication publishing rich riches stock stocks then was wealth wealthy what yawn yawning 166136

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I meant everything I said last night, especially the part


about how diversifying your equity portfolio allows you
to participate in growth potential.

Michael Maslin (4/24/2000)

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316

boyfriend boyfriends brokers budget budgets couple couples date dates dating dinner dollar economics economy finance finances general girlfriend girlfriends income invest investing investment investments invests love man market men money proposals proposes relationship relationships romance scenes stock stocks table woman women 166133

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ruben Bolling (4/24/2000)

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317

advertising back bolling bountiful budget budgets but dollar economics economy enjoy exchange finance finances get good goodness goods happiness happy hey how income invest investing investment investments invests key life lots money now rbo rich riches ruben services simple sit steps stock stocks thanks the way wealth wealthy what yeah your 166137

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ruben Bolling (4/24/2000)

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318

account advertising age alps another army around bag bank between bolling box budget budgets businessman can capitalism casually catalogue catalogues comes create distance dollar economics economy enjoy eyes faces finance finances fl2 fl3 fl6 fl7 fluttering fool form former friends fun fund funds gag general grandfathers grandpa great handy hangers-on harmless hearts horror imagine includes income invest investing investment investments invests item jealousy johnson-smith knows lederhosen longevity looks mail m a n
mention money o order out own parody parties passive people popping pranks pretend quaint rbo real resent rich riches ruben saying secrete secretive showing shows skipping staring stock stocks swashbuckling swiss switzerland sycophants tales tax taxes tenacious them then through trick trust two uncomfortable unspoken wars waves wealth wealthy wills with women wonder wow yes 166138

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We do not usually acknowledge unsolicited manuscripts,


but we want you to know that we tore yours into
tiny pieces. Yours sincerely, The Op-Ed Page.

J.B. Handelsman (4/24/2000)

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319

check couple editor editors general happen journalism journalist letter letters little magazines mail mailbox manuscripts news newspaper newspapers paper papers periodical periodicals press publication publishing rejection rejections reporter reporters tear unsolicited upon writer writers 166126

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (4/24/2000)

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were when which white 166127

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ruben Bolling (4/24/2000)

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321

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I suppose we have Judge Judy to thank for all this.

Sam Gross (4/24/2000)

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322

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Last night, I had the weirdest dream sequence.

Alex Gregory (4/24/2000)

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323

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STOCKOPOLIS

Roz Chast (4/24/2000)

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324

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invest investing investment investments invests junk junkier just lame lists loathes looking made make man many market milk millionaire millionaires money mother nearby new newspaper newspapers oh one out page pal panic paper papered passenger people phone points poor portfolios pretty pumped put quart quotes reacting reading reads repaired repeating replies report rich riches roz run sandwich saying says sell shares son stock stockopolis stocks strawberry street streetscape sure taxi technopex the theres these
thing thinking thinks title trader u-wait understand walks wealth wealthy wears week what whatnot which while window woman yeah yes york youd 166135

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

To tell you the truth, even when Im in water I dont


feel that comfortable.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (5/8/2000)

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325

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Barbara Smaller (5/8/2000)

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326

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Were not certain why they disappeared, but archeologists


speculate that it may have had something to do with
their size.

Harry Bliss (5/8/2000)

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327

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We finally hashed out the pre-nup, but Im


never going to speak to him again.

Donald Reilly (5/8/2000)

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328

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Ive been getting in touch with the puppy in me.

Lee Lorenz (5/8/2000)

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329

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Then I said, So what does a lesbian vegan


Wiccan do for fun?

Danny Shanahan (5/8/2000)

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330

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hi, Im your court-appointed lawyerwhoa!


Dont tell me youve been executed already.

J.B. Handelsman (5/8/2000)

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331

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2000

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Youre in luck. We have an opening for low man


on the totem pole.

Leo Cullum (5/8/2000)

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332

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2000

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Forty minutes at three hundred and fifty degrees should do


it, Miriam, but dont neglect to baste continuously.

Michael Crawford (5/8/2000)

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333

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2000

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Theyre in a statistical dead heat.

Frank Cotham (5/8/2000)

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334

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Dereks sneakers were made in Malaysia. Can anyone


show us where Malaysia is?

Robert Weber (5/8/2000)

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335

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (5/8/2000)

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336

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (5/8/2000)

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337

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2000

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Why me?

Charles Barsotti (5/8/2000)

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338

analyst bowling cart00issue couch game games general insecurity leisure lies patient patients pin pins psychiatrist psychiatrists psychiatrists psychiatry psychologist psychologists psychology session sport sports therapist therapists therapy 166153

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Michael Shaw (5/8/2000)

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339

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Are you telling me you wont even ask the computerized


navigational system for directions?

William Haefeli (5/8/2000)

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340

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (5/15/2000)

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341

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Were pretty sure its the West Nile Virus.

Danny Shanahan (5/15/2000)

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342

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2000

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Pi what squared? Long John, you should be


able to get this.

Pat Byrnes (5/15/2000)

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343

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2000

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I honestly dont know what youre waiting for. By the


time I was your age, Id been married twice.

Barbara Smaller (5/15/2000)

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344

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2000

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Tom Cheney (5/15/2000)

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345

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2000

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Its such a nice day I think Ill walk.

Peter C. Vey (5/15/2000)

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346

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2000

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Mr. Watson, have you ever thought what would


happen to your loved ones if you died tomorrow?

Lee Lorenz (5/15/2000)

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347

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2000

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I dont know, sweetheart. Perhaps Daddy can


tell us if chickens have souls.

David Sipress (5/15/2000)

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348

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2000

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He was doing just fine till he choked on


one of those flexible straws.

Frank Cotham (5/15/2000)

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349

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This is humiliating. Couldnt you drop me


a block from school?

Leo Cullum (5/15/2000)

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350

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2000

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Shes all surgery and hes all pharmacy.

William Hamilton (5/15/2000)

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351

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This is your day, Ma. Let me carry your ammo.

Donald Reilly (5/15/2000)

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352

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Make that a double, and give one to the old bitch


at the end of the bar.

George Booth (5/15/2000)

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353

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2000

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If anyone needs me, Im on my biscotti break


in Bryant Park, ogling the shirtless losers.

Michael Crawford (5/15/2000)

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354

business businessman businessmen businesswoman colleagues corporate corridor discussing executive executives general hierarchy leisure losers men mens new office offices parks professional professionals regional scenes shirts talking women work workers working works york 166169

2000

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John OBrien (5/15/2000)

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355

cancer charades dance dancer disease diseases doctor doctors doctors entertainment exam examinations exams fitness game games got health hop hospital hospitals jig like medical patient patients physician physicians prancer responding sounds youre 166170

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Wheres your section of books that tell you simple


things you already know?

Bruce Eric Kaplan (5/15/2000)

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356

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2000

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Your dog has told me so much about youall


good, I might add.

Liza Donnelly (5/15/2000)

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357

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You may kiss the brides. You may also


kiss the concubines, but dont make a
big tzimmes about it.
J.B. Handelsman (5/15/2000)

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358

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

MAMMA MIA!

Chris Browne (5/15/2000)

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359

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2000

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Great coffee, honey!

Danny Shanahan (5/22/2000)

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360

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (5/22/2000)

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361

ancient arena coliseum dish entertainment film food gladiator history into lion lions parody pets romans tigers waiting walks 166175

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Trust mesex sells.

Alex Gregory (5/22/2000)

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362

another bald clothed consumerism cuisine dogs hot hot-dog low merchant merchants middle-aged naked nude people sex street vend vender venders vending vendor vendors vends 166176

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Thats my best advice to you, Mr. Gilbert. Try not to


reject it out of hand simply because it also happens
to be Mike Lupicas advice to the Mets.

J.C. Duffy (5/22/2000)

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363

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (5/22/2000)

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364

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (5/22/2000)

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365

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2000

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Our little girl is growing upthis very morning


she told me she hates me.

Barbara Smaller (5/22/2000)

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366

child children dad dads daughter daughters families family father fathers growing hate husband kid kids mom moms mother mothers parent parents problems relationships son sons wife young youth 166180

2000

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Sothebys extends its deepest sympathies and wonders


whether the deceased might have owned any early
German Expressionist pieces.

Jack Ziegler (5/22/2000)

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367

acquire art artists artwork auction auctions collector collectors commission commissioned commissions death estate ethics expressionists life modern newly paintings patron patronage patrons receptionist tries 166181

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Peter C. Vey (5/22/2000)

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368

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Leo Cullum (5/22/2000)

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369

accessories accessory ad ads advertising baseball brand brands cap casual clothes clothing commercial consumer crown crowns fashion hats instead king life logo modern royalty stussy throne thrones trends wears 166183

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Lets do snack.

Danny Shanahan (5/22/2000)

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370

another boss bosses boy business businessman businessmen child children clichs conference conferences corporate executive executives expression general kid little lunch meeting meetings office offices one play playground professional professionals recess refers school snack student students word work working works yard yards young youth 166184

2000

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That was a brilliant observation, but it was


poorly phrased.

Victoria Roberts (5/22/2000)

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371

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Bruce Eric Kaplan (5/22/2000)

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372

bad captionless chair chairs communication couple couples domestic empty fights general here home homes husband husbands insert life marital marriage married matrimony problems relationship relationships sign signs wife wives 166186

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Robert Weber (5/22/2000)

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373

attempts boss bosses building business career careers corporate dead death die doormen dying edge employee employees employer employers executive executives head holds inside job jobs ledge man market occupation occupations off office over people problems profession professions rich someone stepping stock stockbrokers stocks suicidal suicide umbrella umbrellas work worker workers working works 166187

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Dont you think the saucepans are overkill?

Alex Gregory (5/22/2000)

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374

bat-wings batman characters chore chores cooking dish dishes domestic fictional frying hero heroes kitchens large overkill pan pans relationships robin saucepans sink skillet super superheroes wash 166188

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Thats not how we make friends, Howard.

Gahan Wilson (5/22/2000)

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375

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Over here, Phyllis. Ive moved to the center.

John Caldwell (5/22/2000)

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376

also baffled candidates center chairs change conservative domestic favorite general home homes house houses husbands husbands liberal living moderated political politicians politics presidential psychology refers room seat stance washington wife 166190

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This artist is a deeply religious feminist and anti-smoking


advocate, who made a lot of money in the computer industry
before going off to paint in Paris, where she now lives with
her husband and two little girls.

David Sipress (5/22/2000)

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377

apple art artists artists collector collectors commission commissioned commissions computer computers curator galleries gallery hieroglyphs life modern money narrative obvious painting paintings patron patronage patrons people rebus reflecting rich standing story symbols women 166191

2000

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Snap out of it, Demos! You think youre the


only one whos ever had waiters block?

Michael Crawford (5/22/2000)

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378

block career careers chastised chef dining general incompetents job jobs kitchen language occupation occupations problems restaurant restaurants service slump stares waiter waiters waiters window work worker workers working works writers 166192

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I used to hate my body. Now, instead, I hate the forces


that conspire to make me hate my body.

William Haefeli (5/22/2000)

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379

advertising age anger another body clothing commercial confidence conspiracy diets down ego fashion fat hate media middle obstacles one people problems shape street walking woman women womens 166193

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Arnie Levin (5/22/2000)

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380

ale arnie art b&w cartoon character characters fairy forest gretel hansel leave levin life line literature modern note notes post-it post-its stories story tale tales technology trail trees yellow 166194

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Id have been here sooner if it hadnt been


for early detection.

Frank Cotham (5/22/2000)

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381

afterlife afterlives age aging angel angles arrived cancer caner cloud clouds cure cures death detection doctors early explains gates hes heaven late man medical medicine old patients pearly peter saint senior seniors soon sooner st. why 166195

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Rodin? Oh, yeah, great buns.

Donald Reilly (5/22/2000)

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382

attraction auguste bodies body cafe discuss discussing france men outdoor paris sculptor sculptors sculpture sculptures women work 166196

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Lets just sit tight until we get some backup.

Michael Maslin (5/22/2000)

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383

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

User name and password?

Arnie Levin (5/29/2000)

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384

afterlife afterlives angel angles approaches cloud clouds computers death digital gates heaven internet man names password pearly peter religion saint security st. technology web 166198

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Capri pants, capri jacketthe ideal summer suit.

Robert Mankoff (5/29/2000)

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385

businessmen buy buying clerk clothes clothing consume consumer consumerism consumers cropped customer customers department fashion fashions man mens modeling retail sale sales salesman salesmen shop shopper shoppers shopping shops store stores style styles suit summer sutis tail tailoting trend trends women 166199

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its her first bench-clearing brawl.

William Haefeli (5/29/2000)

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386

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Would it be too much to ask to get a DSL in here?

Matthew Diffee (5/29/2000)

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387

cell cells computers convict convicts criminal criminals demands digitally form high-speed incarceration internet jail jails line lines modems prison prisoner prisoners prisons service specialized supplied technology telecommunications telephone using web 166201

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

David Sipress (5/29/2000)

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388

actual advertising all buy buying captionless consume consumer consumerism consumers customer customers department display gazes general handled home internet into items mail may merchandise off-line old-fashioned order other pay prior purchase read retail sale sales shop shopper shoppers shopping shops signs size sold soon store storefront stores take technology telecommunications through window woman 166202

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ive forgotten what I want to be remembered for.

Nick Downes (5/29/2000)

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389

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Meritocracy worked for my grandfather, it worked for


my father, and its working for me.

Barbara Smaller (5/29/2000)

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390

ancestors bar boasts business dad dads families family father fathers friend general generation generations glass grandfathers grandparent grandparents hierarchy jargon man parent parents poolside raised son sons success wealth 166204

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Whose level do you want to stoop to


tonight, mine or yours?

Michael Crawford (5/29/2000)

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391

bar bars boyfriend boyfriends communication couple couples date dates dating drinking flirtations general girlfriend girlfriends leisure life love man men modern pick pickups psychology relationship relationships scenes sex society stoop tries woman women 166205

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (5/29/2000)

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392

adolescence adolescent age announcing boy captionless carriers challenges childhood children coming down end general medical psychology sign street teen teen-agers teenager teenagers teens walks 166206

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Good newsa four-letter word for earthen pot is olla.

Danny Shanahan (5/29/2000)

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393

assist crossword doctor doctors earthen emergency fitness game games general health hobbies hospital hospitals journalism leisure media medical medicine news newspaper newspapers olla operating out paper papers patient patients periodical periodicals physician physicians pot publication publishing puzzle puzzles room steps waiting woman 166207

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Maybe zero tolerance is setting the bar too high.

Lee Lorenz (5/29/2000)

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394

boss bosses business businessmen career careers crime criminals drugs employee employees employer employers employment executives fire fired firing general harassment job jobs law near-empty observes occupation occupations office offices profession professions set sexual unemployed unemployment work worker workers working works zero 166208

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This is a little embarrassing to admit, but everything


that happens happens for no real reason.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (5/29/2000)

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395

afterlife afterlives angel angles bible biblical catholic catholicism christ christianity church churches cloud clouds embarrass embarrassing god happen happens heaven peter philosophy reason religion religious saint speaks st. 166209

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This judge is known as tough but fair, with


a great sense of humor.

Donald Reilly (5/29/2000)

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396

act attorney attorneys client clients comedian comedians court courtroom courtrooms courts defendant defendants entertainment fair gallagher gallagher-like gavel includes judge judges law lawyer lawyers oversized smashes stage tendencies tough trial trials watermelon watermelons whose 166210

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Tom Kleh (5/29/2000)

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397

all captionless come commute commuter commuters commuting hamlet images line literature mental not now passenger platform platforms plays quotations rail railroad railroads rails readiness shakespeare station subway subways thinks tis train trains transit transportation urban waiting will william writers writing yet 166211

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I medicate first and ask questions later.

Frank Cotham (5/29/2000)

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398

analyst doctors drugs guns medicate medicine offices patient patients prescribe prescribes prozac psychiatrist psychiatrists psychiatry psychologist psychologists psychology session shoot therapist therapists therapy 166212

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Little Joey invented the one-click rubout.

Peter Steiner (5/29/2000)

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399

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh, Im so-o-o-o-o impressed.

Jack Ziegler (5/29/2000)

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400

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And just exactly what is that expression intended to convey?

Gahan Wilson (5/29/2000)

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401

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I spy with my little eyesomething on fire.

Harry Bliss (5/29/2000)

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402

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its the Brideare you here?

John Caldwell (5/29/2000)

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403

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I just dont think a giant flaming blob of alien


ectoplasm would say that.

Alex Gregory (5/29/2000)

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404

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hold my calls for a while, Wilson.

Mick Stevens (6/5/2000)

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405

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Robert Mankoff (6/5/2000)

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406

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Wood-oven-toasted rosemary focaccia


or traditional baguette?

David Sipress (6/5/2000)

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407

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Your infection may be antibiotic-resistant, but lets see


how it responds to intensive litigation.

Alex Gregory (6/5/2000)

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408

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Theres an article in here that explains why youre


such an idiot.

William Haefeli (6/5/2000)

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409

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Peter Steiner (6/5/2000)

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410

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Good news, honeyseventy is the new fifty.

Victoria Roberts (6/5/2000)

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411

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

But the weather looks great for the rest of the week.

Frank Cotham (6/5/2000)

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412

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

My broker says dont panic, Im still young


enough to recoup my losses.

Bernard Schoenbaum (6/5/2000)

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413

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im your most boring nightmare.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (6/5/2000)

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414

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its getting late, sweetheart. We should probably think


about heading back to the Arctic Circle.

Michael Crawford (6/5/2000)

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415

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Why dont you go back to your house for dessert and coffee?

Danny Shanahan (6/5/2000)

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416

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (6/5/2000)

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417

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And Ill have that lightly sedated, please.

Charles Barsotti (6/5/2000)

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418

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

ANIMAL CITY (1 of 5)

Arnold Roth (6/5/2000)

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419

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2000

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ANIMAL CITY (2 of 5)

Arnold Roth (6/5/2000)

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420

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

ANIMAL CITY (3 of 5)

Arnold Roth (6/5/2000)

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421

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

ANIMAL CITY (4 of 5)

Arnold Roth (6/5/2000)

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422

and animals best birds canines carriage cat cats city dog doggie dogs feline felines friend horse horses man's manhattan mice mouse neighborhoods new nyc pet pets pigeons pooch puppies puppy rat rats regional ride rides rodent rodents stallion stallions urban york 174422

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

ANIMAL CITY (5 of 5)

Arnold Roth (6/5/2000)

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423

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Look, call it denial if you like, but I think what goes on


in my personal life is none of my own damn business.

Robert Mankoff (6/12/2000)

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424

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Frank Cotham (6/12/2000)

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425

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its Doris Kearns Goodwin. Is there anything wed


like to know about the Presidency?

David Sipress (6/12/2000)

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426

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I use broccoli rabe as a litmus test.

William Haefeli (6/12/2000)

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427

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

When I grow up, I want to work with the affluent.

Mike Twohy (6/12/2000)

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428

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2000

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He did it my way.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (6/12/2000)

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429

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You just self-deprecated yourself right out of a job.

Frank Cotham (6/12/2000)

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430

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2000

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Edward Koren (6/12/2000)

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431

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sure, we can have dinner. But only if your


breasts sign a non-compete clause.

Marisa Acocella (6/12/2000)

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432

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The only solution I can see is to hold a series of long and


costly hearings in order to put off finding a solution.

Jack Ziegler (6/12/2000)

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433

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hes playing very hard to gethes got a


restraining order.

Barbara Smaller (6/12/2000)

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434

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I liked recess a lot better before the safety helmets.

Mick Stevens (6/12/2000)

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435

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Danny Shanahan (6/12/2000)

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436

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Thursdays and Saturdays, its glassblowing, Mondays


and Wednesdays its Morris dancing!

George Booth (6/12/2000)

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437

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Are we looking more for target shooting,


or, like, closure?

William Hamilton (6/12/2000)

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438

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Once, I tried to change the laces, and the Landmarks


Commission came down on me like a ton of bricks.

Alex Gregory (6/12/2000)

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439

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Enemies, yes, but doesnt your moat also keep out love?

Charles Barsotti (6/12/2000)

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440

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (6/12/2000)

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441

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marched market megatravel middle middle-age middle-aged mom mothers mysteries new newspapers next notion old only operating original out outdated overhearing page color panels people person physical places progress qzp qzps reads repulsed robocelebs roz safe said same saying science screen see sex shapeless showing side sky-high some something sooner still stock stockbrokers stocks system technological technologies teen-agers television than the there think three time too true was were what when which whole
will without worried xkb yakking you 166252

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THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (6/19/2000)

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442

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its just Mayor Giuliani asking us to have a nice day.

Lee Lorenz (6/19/2000)

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443

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Shes got money and hes a poet.

William Hamilton (6/19/2000)

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444

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2000

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Tell me what you think of the menu. I wrote it.

Mick Stevens (6/19/2000)

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445

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2000

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Hes just doing that to get attention.

Harry Bliss (6/19/2000)

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446

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

My goal is to die before theres a technology breakthrough


that forces me to live to a hundred and thirty.

Barbara Smaller (6/19/2000)

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447

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2000

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Im confused now. Was Shakespeare somebody else


or was somebody else Shakespeare?

Robert Mankoff (6/19/2000)

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448

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2000

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Mommy, Becky says shes not going to put me


in her memoirs!

Liza Donnelly (6/19/2000)

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449

book books child children complains dad dads daughter daughters families family father fathers fights general journal journals kid kids memoir memoirs mom moms mother mothers parent parents problems sisters son sons threat write writers writing young youth 166260

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Doug Reina (6/19/2000)

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450

bathroom circus clown clowns comedian comedians entertainment flower gag general jokes lapel leisure life modern releases stream urinal urinals urinate 166261

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Fine, but until you chop off my head you will do what I say.

Charles Barsotti (6/19/2000)

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451

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (6/19/2000)

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452

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I never should have tried to take my accounting


to the next level.

Leo Cullum (6/19/2000)

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453

accounting career careers cause cell cells collar crime crimes criminal criminals discussing incarceration jail jails jobs laments level ob occupation occupations over prison prisoner prisoners prisons white work worker workers working works 166264

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Danny Shanahan (6/19/2000)

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454

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2000

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Ive been hearing nothing but good


things about you.

Robert Weber (6/19/2000)

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455

afterlife afterlives angel angles cloud clouds god good gossip hear hearing heaven man meets nothing religion 166266

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Your book stinkswe want to publish it.

Peter Steiner (6/19/2000)

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456

author authors bearded behind book books chair critics desk essay essays fiction general incompetents literature novel novels publication publications publisher publishers publishing sitting stinks stories story writer writers 166267

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

John OBrien (6/19/2000)

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457

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Were working on reading readiness.

Edward Koren (6/19/2000)

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458

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Copywriting is too writing.

Marisa Acocella (6/19/2000)

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459

advertising career careers cocktail copy fashionable general job jobs language man mingle mingling occupation occupations parties party play social socialize socializing woman word work worker workers working works writers writing 166270

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You tell him that you find the flag offensive.

Frank Cotham (6/19/2000)

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460

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I want to get married and start a family with you


although God knows who Ill want to finish it with.

William Haefeli (6/19/2000)

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461

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I thought it had a lot to say about evil villains who


want to take over the world.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (6/19/2000)

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462

ahracters audience audiences caharcter child children cinema cinemas critic criticism critics critique crowd crowds discussing evil exit film films general heroes kid kids movie movies super theatre two villains young youth 166273

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

First, they take my domain, then they take


my domain name.

Paul Karasik (6/19/2000)

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463

computer computers domain fairy internet joke kingdom laments life loss modern name over prince princes problems royalty slips tales technology web 166274

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Lucy tells me youre a writer. Im no stranger


to self-delusion myself.

Michael Crawford (6/19/2000)

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464

author authors book books cocktail converse escape escapes essay essays fiction fire gathering general guest guests introduce introduces introduction introductions language literature men mingle mingling novel novels outside parties party psychology publication publications publishing self-delusion social socialize socializing stories story stranger two writer writers 166275

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh, goody. More reality-based crap.

Jack Ziegler (7/3/2000)

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465

apartment based castaway crap desert eking entertainment existence general group island listed listings man new news out people poor program programs reacts real reality reality-based reference rundown sarcastically show shows survivor televised television televisions tv tvs volunteers 166276

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

David Sipress (7/3/2000)

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466

alamos amid been behind computer computers discovered dogs drives each espionage furor general had hard hardware hot info lab los mexico missing much new nuclear over photocopier reappeared refers scenes scientists secrets selling software stolen street subsequently this two urban vendor weapons 166277

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You might want to do a rubber-glove count.

Frank Cotham (7/3/2000)

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467

chef complains count cuisine diner dining disease eat eating food general glove gloves hand headwaiter health illness incompetents inside jargon kitchen meal meals medical menu menus missing one operating order ordering orders out patient peeks possibility problems refers restaurant restaurants room rubber service surgical waiter waiters window 166278

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Gruelling as this is, its not a total-body workout.

Alex Gregory (7/3/2000)

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468

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Getting U.S.D.A. approval means a lot


to you, doesnt it?

Michael Maslin (7/3/2000)

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469

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I dont know why. I just suddenly felt like calling.

Mick Stevens (7/3/2000)

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470

alone beepers call calling calls cell cellphone cellphones cells cellular communicate communicates communication communications else everyone felt general life lonely man mobile modern phone phones portable scenes street talking talks technology telephone telephones urban 166281

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Go ahead. Press one for more options.

Edward Koren (7/3/2000)

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471

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What ever will we think about now that the genome


project is almost complete?

Victoria Roberts (7/3/2000)

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472

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What did people do before they could read about the same
handful of famous people over and over again?

Bruce Eric Kaplan (7/3/2000)

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473

asks celebrities child children curious dad dads daughter daughters entertainment fame families family famous father fathers general kid kids magazine magazine-reading magazines media mom moms mother mothers parent parents periodical publication publishing question read reading son sons young youth 166284

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (7/3/2000)

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474

another ask buzz buzzer buzzers canal care chewing choice cholesterol cliche cliches cushion dental dentists developing device embarrassing er eternal extremely gag general got gratitude gum gumbut hand health here high humor idea illustrating its joke jokes joy just laughter lifesaver like literally made man moments noise now one ordinary packed panels perfectly persons pillow posture practical put real root root-canal sat say shake situation someones son specs spine stick straight tastes there think timmy too trick
vitamin vitamins whole whoopee why will woman would x-ray youve 166285

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Turn over and Ill do your back.

Danny Shanahan (7/3/2000)

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475

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (7/3/2000)

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476

eleven ancient called chain consumer consumerism convenience cradle depicts general history modern numerals roman rome signs store stores version vii-xi 166287

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Here they come: Detox and Botox.

William Hamilton (7/3/2000)

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477

abuse addict addiction addicts alcoholics alcoholism another botoxin cocktail cosmetic couple couples domestic drug erase face fad gossip gossiping gossips guest guests husband husbands injecting into involves life man marriage married matrimony medical mingle mingling modern nerve new one parties party plastic play poison problems raucous recovery refers rehab relationship relationships social socialize socializing surgery which whispers wife wives word wrinkles 166288

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

My doctor says you should be drawing more fruits


and vegetables.

Peter C. Vey (7/3/2000)

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478

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I understand the Everest climb used to be quite a chore.

Gahan Wilson (7/3/2000)

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479

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Yes, sir, fat freestraight from the gym.

Charles Barsotti (7/3/2000)

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480

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

David Sipress (7/3/2000)

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481

author authors book books bookshelf chair control controller convenience easy entertainment essay essays fiction flies general interiors life literature magic man modern novel novels off points publication publications publishing remote shelf sitting stories story technology television writer writers 166292

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We think it has something to do with your genome.

Robert Mankoff (7/10/2000)

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482

bug bugs diagnosis disease diseases dna doctor doctors engineering exam examination examinations exams fitness flys genetic genome gives head health hospital hospitals ill illness insect insects life medical modern patient patients physician physicians problems sci sick sickness why 166304

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Just tell him, in the words of Mike Tyson, I want his heart,
I want to eat his children. Hell take the call.

Charles Barsotti (7/10/2000)

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483

aggressive-looking boss bosses box boxer boxers boxing business businessman businessmen conference conferences corporate desk executive executives fight fights general meeting meetings office offices press prizefighter prizefighters professional professionals quotations refers ring rings round rounds telephone telephones topical violence work working works 166305

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

All right, so I missed your soccer game. But didnt my


assistant send you a lovely fruit basket?

Alex Gregory (7/10/2000)

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484

apologies apology auto automobile automobiles autos car cars child children convertible dad dads drive drives driving families family father fathers general hollywood kid kids lovely neglectful parent parents problems relationships ride soccer son sons sports vehicle vehicles young youth 166306

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I hardly think youll warrant an invitation-only funeral.

William Haefeli (7/10/2000)

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485

celebrity chair couple couples death domestic ego fireplace husband husbands leaning man mantle marriage married matrimony reading relationship relationships vanity wife wives woman 166298

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Damn it, he was a regular.

Charles Barsotti (7/10/2000)

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486

alcohol alcoholic alcoholics alligator animals bar bars bartender bartenders cocktail cocktails crocodile dragon dragons drink drinking drinks drunk drunks eat glasses inebriated intoxicated kill liquor monster monsters next pair problems pub sitting tavern taverns wild 166299

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Know what I think?


Of course.

Robert Mankoff (7/10/2000)

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487

beside book couch couple couples husband husbands man marriage married matrimony newspaper problems psychology reading relationship relationships sitting wife wives woman 166301

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hey, Johnnyam I nuts, or does this have


a hint of oak?

Edward Koren (7/10/2000)

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488

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You will run away from the circus and join a dot-com.

Michael Maslin (7/10/2000)

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489

away business circus clown clowns companies computers dubious entertainer entertainers entertainment entertains financial fortune gypsy internet nonsensical partly performer performers plans pseudo refers run science some status technology tellers tells web 166308

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Yes, he does speak, but only on condition of anonymity.

Mort Gerberg (7/10/2000)

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490

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (7/10/2000)

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491

approach congratulations couple couples domestic front games giant husband husbands labyrinth life marriage married mat matrimony maze mazes modern newlyweds problems puzzles relationship relationships wedding weddings wife wives 166302

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Monkey see, monkey overanalyze.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (7/10/2000)

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492

against analyst animals another leaning log notes patient patients play problems psychiatrist psychiatrists psychiatry psychologist psychologists psychology session taking talking therapist therapists therapy word 166296

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Leo Cullum (7/10/2000)

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493

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Stroll down it aloneIll wait here.

Al Ross (7/10/2000)

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494

against age aging couple couples domestic fights history husband husbands lane leaning marital marriage married matrimony memory old relationship relationships remember reminisce senior seniors tree walk wife wives 166310

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I cant help feeling a little suspicious. One half is to be run by


Bill Gates, and the other half by someone called Gil Bates.

J.B. Handelsman (7/10/2000)

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495

breakup business celebrities coffee corporation department drinks gatess general holding husband justice legal management microsoft monopoly names news newspaper newspapers paper papers periodical periodicals publication publishing refers suspicious table woman 166311

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And if things dont work out in the big city, Cindy, you can
always come back home to me and Mom and our nightmare
descent into booze and pills.

Michael Crawford (7/10/2000)

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496

addiction addictions boards bus child children college dad dads daughter daughters drugs families family father fathers fitness kid kids mom moms mother mothers parent parents problem problems relationships she son sons young youth 166297

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

No, were not getting any younger, but why, pray tell,
is that such a revelation to us?

Victoria Roberts (7/10/2000)

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497

age chair couch couple couples domestic easy generation generations husband husbands man marriage married matrimony old relationship relationships sitting wife wives woman 166303

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Michael Shaw (7/10/2000)

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498

auto automobile automobiles autos boss bosses business car career careers cars corporate disgruntled drive drives driving employee employees employer employers job jobs lone lot management month next occupation occupations office parking problems profession professions reads sign spot vehicle vehicles violence work worker workers working works 166300

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Youre the perfect storm . . . in a teacup.

Victoria Roberts (7/17/2000)

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499

couple couples general husband husbands man marriage married matrimony movie movies new perfect play refers relationship relationships restaurant restaurants storm table tempest wife wives woman word 166312

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im cutting you off.

Mick Stevens (7/17/2000)

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500

animal animals benches birds cutting fat feeder fitness general giant-sized health large life modern park people pigeon problems scenes urban 166313

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If it were my car, Id disconnect it from the battery recharger,


take it home, and let it die in its own garage.

Michael Maslin (7/17/2000)

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501

auto-mechanic automobiles bad batteries customer dead death euthanasia garages gasoline general gives health ill mechanic mechanics news repair repairs service stations terminally 166314

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mike Twohy (7/17/2000)

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502

abroad cap dantibes dogs france general italy kennel le location owners pet pets regional reveal spot talking their tuscany two vacation vacations 166315

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Totally naked except for my socks. How bout yourself?

David Sipress (7/17/2000)

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503

beepers bout businessman call calling calls cell cellular clothes clothing communicate communicates communication communications corner dressed fashion fashions fully lie lies life mobile modern naked phone phones portable public sex sexual socks street style styles talking telephone telephones trend trends urban wireless 166316

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh, how I long for the days when you could flip someone
the bird and live to tell about it.

William Haefeli (7/17/2000)

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504

annoyed auto automobile automobiles autos car cars drive driver drives driving flippin freeway freeways general highway highways language live passenger play problems rage road traffic vehicle vehicles violence word 166317

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its part of His new diversity program.

Arnie Levin (7/17/2000)

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505

action affirmative afterlife afterlives angel angles another business cloud clouds demon devil devils diversity god heaven hell hiring one personnel religion satan seeing two 166318

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Howards gone on the Tour de France without


his bicycle again.

Peter C. Vey (7/17/2000)

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506

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Our civilization is thousands of years more advanced


than yours, yet still sort of kitschy.

Alex Gregory (7/17/2000)

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507

alien background civilization coat creatures earth flying kitschy lab man modern outer planet play saucer sci sci-fi scientists space travel visitor word 166320

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I like his earlier work better, particularly the ones I said


I didnt like at the time.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (7/17/2000)

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508

appreciation art artists artists audience audiences critic criticism critics critique crowd crowds earlier general guest guests like liked mingle mingling parties party social socialize socializing their two voice women work 166321

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

My seven-year-old is a prince, but my forty-sevenyear-old is a pain in the ass.

William Hamilton (7/17/2000)

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509

age aging another ass child children courtside dad daddies dads daughter daughters divorce drinks elderly families family father fathers general generation kid kids middle mom moms mother mothers old over pain parent parents relationships son sons sugar tennis-player wealthy young youth 166322

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Lee Lorenz (7/17/2000)

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510

available censorship couple coveted entertainment following gap general generation life media middle-aged modern only program programs reads screen show shows teen teen-agers teenager teenagers teens television televisions tv tvs viewers watching young 166323

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

They tell me youre a nincompoop, Henderson, but you


certainly do know how to maintain a crease.

Jack Ziegler (7/17/2000)

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511

arms being boss bosses business career careers chair clothes clothing crease employee employees employer employers employment executives extended fashion fashions incompetents interviewed job jobs keeps legs management mens nincompoop occupation occupations office personnel press profession professions style styles suit trend trends work worker workers working works 166324

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Lisa, bring out the Alistair Cheng files and an iced


mochaccino, if you will, please.

Michael Crawford (7/17/2000)

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512

assistant assistants at beach beaches beepers boss bosses business businessman businessmen cellular corporate executive executives hierarchy man management moccachino ocean oceans office offices phone portable professional professionals sand sea seas seashore seashores secretaries secretary shore shores sitting swimming telephones umbrella under vacation water waters wireless work working works 166325

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ask the judge whether we can find the defendant


not guilty and still execute him.

Peter Steiner (7/17/2000)

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513

attorney attorneys bailiff client clients court courtroom courtrooms courts crime criminals defendant defendants ethics execution executions guilty judge judges juries juror jurors jury law lawyer lawyers not stand trial trials witness witnesses 166326

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Two?

Frank Cotham (7/17/2000)

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514

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

But Im not here to talk about bowling.

Peter Mueller (7/17/2000)

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515

ball bowling entertainment game games general guest host hosts leisure media program programs show shows sports talk television televisions tv tvs 166328

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mr. Tilson will suffer you gladly now.

John Caldwell (7/17/2000)

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516

assistant assistants books boss bosses business businessman businessmen conference conferences corporate executive executives fools literature lobby man meeting meetings office offices poetry professional professionals receptionist receptionists secretaries secretary shakespeare speaks waiting work workers working works writing 166329

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What would I do differently if you had


my life to live over again?

J.B. Handelsman (7/17/2000)

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517

couple couples different domestic general husband husbands language life living marriage married matrimony play relationship relationships room wife wives word 166330

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (7/17/2000)

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518

advertisement advertisements afraid all alone already angry anguished apologize back beard between bill bit blow bring bringing brown capeesh chast computers desk does doesnt down earth end enemies even ever everybody fast fondly gates god going gonna government grandmother hes head hit holding however idea includes just kid know late leave let lets letter letters little looks low madness make man mean middle-aged misunderstanding money must nervous none not odd over paid people pigtails pretty professor real
reason red red-haired repeat revenge rich richer roz say sideburns silly some soon stand stop stuff succeed swear sweater teensiest tell than that them this threatening too wanted was weird well what when wild-eyed will woman wont you 166331

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Life isnt fair, Cosgrove. Now bring me your wife.

Charles Barsotti (7/24/2000)

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519

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The editor who turned down the first Harry Potter book, say
hello to the publisher who took a pass on Stephen King.

Jack Ziegler (7/24/2000)

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520

another author authors book books business cocktail essay essays fiction introduces introductions literature man novel novels one parties publication publications publishers publishing rowlings stories story writer writers 166334

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And me without my bear spray!

Victoria Roberts (7/24/2000)

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521

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I was reading somewhere that people are stupid.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (7/24/2000)

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522

books cocktail guest guests incompetents intelligence life man mingle mingling modern parties party people read reading social socialize socializing stupid woman 166336

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This is the perfect choice for whatever youre perpetrating.

Frank Cotham (7/24/2000)

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523

buying clerk consumerism crime crimes criminal criminals gun guns man perpetrating shopping store urban violence weapon weapons 166337

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its very important that you try very, very hard to


remember where you electronically transferred
Mommy and Daddys assets.

Michael Maslin (7/24/2000)

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524

bank banking banks budget budgets child children computers couch dad dads daughter daughters dollar economics economy electronic families family father fathers finance finances general income internet kid kids life modern mom moms money mother mothers parent parents problems remember rich riches sitting son sons speaking stands technology transfers wealth wealthy young youth 166338

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I couldnt agree morebut, then again, I hate


even non-lethal injections.

Robert Mankoff (7/24/2000)

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525

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Frank! Frank, honey, wake up! Your lampits humongous!

Michael Crawford (7/24/2000)

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526

bed bedroom beside couple couples dream dreams furniture general giant-sized household humongous husband husbands interiors lamps marriage married matrimony night nightmares oversized problems psychology relationship relationships rest scenes sleep sleeping stand wife wives 166340

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

David Sipress (7/24/2000)

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527

apartment apartments budget budgets building business buzzers city dollar economics economy estate finance finances finds income life lobby modern money names new prices real rich riches showing urban wealth wealthy woman worth york 166341

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mrs. Jennings, can Billy come out and smoke?

Matthew Diffee (7/24/2000)

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528

child children cigarette cigarettes cigars dad dads decisions doorway families family father fathers fitness front general kid kids medical mom moms mother mothers parent parents play smoke smoker smokers smokes smoking son sons stoop tobacco two variations woman young youth 166342

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I dont bug you about your catnip. Dont bug


me about my Martinis.

Leo Cullum (7/24/2000)

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529

addictions alcohol alcoholic alcoholics animals argue argues arguing argument arguments bug cat catnip cats cocktail cocktails couple couples dog dogs drink drinking drinks drugs fighting fights general husband husbands liquor living marriage married martini matrimony pets problem problems relationship relationships room talking wife wives 166343

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

He didnt want to end it, so I told him


I wanted to get married.

Marisa Acocella (7/24/2000)

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530

boyfriend boyfriends conversation conversations converse couple couples date dates dating discussing discussion discussions during girlfriend girlfriends gossip gossiping gossips marriage massage men proposals relationship relationships talk talking two women 166344

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I say its genetically altered, and I


say the hell with it.

Peter Steiner (7/24/2000)

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531

boy broccoli carl cartoon child children cook cooking cuisine dear dinging dining dinner dna eat eating engineering families family food genetic kid kids life low meal meals menu menus modern mom moms mother mothers parent parents problems refers rose small son sons spinach table technology young youth 166345

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

One of us has to draw the line somewhere, and


I draw the line at mall sushi.

Jack Ziegler (7/24/2000)

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532

consumerism cuisine dining draw fights front life low mall malls man marital meal meals modern order ordering orders problems restaurant restaurants service shopping sushi talking trend trends waiter waiters woman 166346

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If only legginess were based on


circumference.

William Haefeli (7/24/2000)

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533

age body break circumference exercise fat figure fitness form gender height language legginess leggy legs lunch middle people shape tall their two walk watch weight woman women 166347

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I think it was an election year.

Danny Shanahan (7/24/2000)

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534

age anthropologists archeologist archeology campaigns cave cavemen chasing conservative democratic donkey donkeys dwellers elections elephant elephants government hunters liberal look painting paintings party political politicians politics prehistoric republican spears stone two 166348

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (7/24/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

535

boss bosses business businessman businessmen by cafe conference conferences corporate cuisine executive executives general high-finance introducing low management meeting meetings moguls office offices only professional professionals restaurant restaurants started taxes the theme three top variations waiters work working works 166349

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Theyre the lucky ones. Were headed for telemarketing.

Nick Downes (7/24/2000)

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536

afterlife afterlives burning career careers death demon devil devils flames hell job jobs lucky members new occupation occupations others pass problems satan telemarketing work worker workers working works 166350

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

NEW MASTER PAINTING (1 of 6)

The Oaths of the Venture Capitalists

William Hamilton (7/24/2000)

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537

boss bosses business businessmen career careers david employee employees employer employers general horattii job jobs master new oaths occupation occupations office painters painting paintings parodies parody profession professions various work worker workers working works 166351

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

NEW MASTER PAINTING (2 of 6)

Madonno and Child

William Hamilton (7/24/2000)

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538

babies baby businessmen child children dad dads davinci elders families family father fathers general kid kids madonna master new painters painting paintings parent parents parodies parody son sons susanna various young youth 166352

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

NEW MASTER PAINTING (3 of 6)

Annunciation

William Hamilton (7/24/2000)

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539

annunciation babies baby bottocellis businessmen families family general master new painters painting paintings parodies parody pregnancy pregnant various 166353

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

NEW MASTER PAINTING (4 of 6)

A P.R. Intern Named Salome with the


Head Shot of John the Client

William Hamilton (7/24/2000)

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540

baptist boss bosses business businessmen caravaggio career careers employee employees employer employers general job jobs master new occupation occupations office painters painting paintings parodies parody profession professions redones salome various work worker workers working works 166354

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

NEW MASTER PAINTING (5 of 6)

Portrait of a Lady

William Hamilton (7/24/2000)

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541

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

NEW MASTER PAINTING (6 of 6)

Susanna Explaining Broadband to the Elders

William Hamilton (7/24/2000)

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542

boss bosses business businessmen career careers computer employee employees employer employers general internet job jobs master new occupation occupations office painters painting paintings parodies parody profession professions ruebans technology tintoretto various veronese web work worker workers working works 166356

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And my lawyer says we have a hell of a case


against La-Z-Boy.

Charles Barsotti (7/31/2000)

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543

another attorney attorneys bar bars brand brands cigarettes cigars client clients court courtroom courtrooms courts defendant defendants drinking furniture general hell judge judges law lawsuits lawyer lawyers man one sitting smoking sue suing trial trials 166357

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Exactly what is this nothing Ive been hearing


so much about?

David Sipress (7/31/2000)

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544

asks buddhism class eastern everything lesson meditate meditation monk monks nothing philosophy religion religions student students zen 166358

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

How can you feel threatened by someone young enough


to be your sullen, uncommunicative daughter?

Michael Crawford (7/31/2000)

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545

adolescent adultery affairs bed bedroom beside couple couples daddies daughters family husband husbands love lying marriage married matrimony problems relationship relationships scenes sex sugar teen teenagers teens threatened wife wives 166359

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Youve got a bit of thong caught between your front teeth.

Nick Downes (7/31/2000)

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546

animals another bathing beach beaches clothes clothing fashion fashions fish fitness one shark sharks speaking style styles suit suits swimming talking teeth thongs trend trends violence 166360

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Today were going to talk about lowering the drawbridge.

Charles Barsotti (7/31/2000)

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547

advice analyst drawbridges insecurity king offers patient patients play problems psychiatrist psychiatrists psychiatry psychologist psychologists psychology royalty session therapist therapists therapy word 166361

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Alex Gregory (7/31/2000)

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548

always animals away balloon catch dog dogs ego esteem fetch game games general good great head images its master masters mental never over owner pets psychology says self talking thought walking 166362

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Your attitude is sucking all the fulfillment


out of motherhood.

Barbara Smaller (7/31/2000)

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549

attitude child children daughter families family fulfillment gap general generation kid kids mom moms mother motherhood mothers parent parents problems psychology relationships reprimands son sons young youth 166363

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Has our apologist been alerted?

William Hamilton (7/31/2000)

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550

alert alerted apologist boss bosses business businessman businessmen corporate executive executives four kind life look management media men modern office offices over problems professional professionals report some three woman work working works 166364

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You know, if I wrote all day, and you brought me meals


on a tray, I could pretend I was at one of those writers
colonies all summer.

Victoria Roberts (7/31/2000)

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551

author authors book books colonies couch couple couples cup domestic essay essays fiction general hand holding husband husbands literature marriage married matrimony newspaper novel novels pretend pretentious publication publications publishing reading relationship relationships stories story summer wife wives writer writers 166365

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

How about something nice for his ashes?

Robert Weber (7/31/2000)

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552

aged ashes clerk consumerism dead death die funeral funerals general gifts holding husbands marriage middle shopper shopping store stores urn woman 166366

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Theyre all for staying out of trouble.

Peter Steiner (7/31/2000)

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553

armies army award awards chest cocktail combat forces g.i. general generals gi medals military officer officers parties party pointing problems rank relationships soldier soldiers speaking troop troops woman 166367

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What goes around comes around more annoying.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (7/31/2000)

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554

annoy annoying argue argues arguing argument arguments around clichs couple couples debate debates domestic fighting fights goes husband husbands language living man marriage married matrimony play problem problems relationship relationships room sit wife wives woman word 166368

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

While the cats away, the mouse will get tanked


every night and also grow a beard.

Jack Ziegler (7/31/2000)

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555

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Peter Mueller (7/31/2000)

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556

archeology cat cats egypt general history hole like mice mouse mummies mummy old out pest pests problems regional sphinx stalks toward 166370

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Just got the script from the focus group. Fabulous!

Pat Byrnes (7/31/2000)

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557

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Would you care to see our gasoline list, or do you


know what you want?

Michael Maslin (7/31/2000)

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558

attendant autos consumerism dining driving fuel gas gasoline general life like menus modern motorist offers order orders restaurant restaurants service station stations waiter waiters wine 166372

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Do you mind telling me where youre going with this?

John Caldwell (7/31/2000)

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559

air alley businessman crime crimes criminal criminals gun hands hold pointing rob robber robbers robbery steal theft ups urban 166373

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Youre a very complex carbohydrate.

Arnie Levin (7/31/2000)

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560

analyst analysts carbohydrate complex couch cuisine eat eating experiment experiments food freud lab laboratories laboratory labs like lump microscope microscopes nutrition patient patients peers psychiatrist psychiatrists psychiatry psychologist psychologists psychology scientist scientists session small therapist therapists therapy through tiny 166374

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

George Booth (7/31/2000)

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561

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Funny. I never thought of you as having legs.

Mick Stevens (8/7/2000)

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562

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

For one million dollars, what have I been talking about for the
past ten minutes: the upcoming election, my mother, my job,
or an article in the Home section about kitchen makeovers?

David Sipress (8/7/2000)

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563

annoyed argue argues arguing argument arguments couch couple couples fighting fights game husband husbands living marital marriage married matrimony media millionaire money new paper problem problems reading relationship relationships room shows sitting speaks television times wants wife wives york 166377

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Bad news, Dadyoure brain-dead!

Mike Twohy (8/7/2000)

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564

bag brain child children dad dads dead diagnoses disease diseases doctor doctors exam examination examinations exams families family father fathers fitness general health hospital hospitals ill illness kid kids medical parent parents patient patients physician physicians sick sickness son sons toy young youth 166378

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Our hobby is finding old, run-down Victorian houses


and levelling them.

Alex Gregory (8/7/2000)

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565

antique antiques cocktail couple estate greed guest guests hobby home homes houses level leveling mingle mingling parties party real restore social socialize socializing speaks woman 166379

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Working at home has been a mixed blessing.

Danny Shanahan (8/7/2000)

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566

animal bird birds business career careers child children dad dads daughter daughters families family father fathers general home household job jobs kid kids life mixed modern mom moms mother mothers neighbor nest nests occupation occupations offices parent parents sitting son sons talks work worker workers working works young youth 166380

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Marisa Acocella (8/7/2000)

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567

age aging automobiles beach beaches boardwalk boardwalks entrance fashion fitness limit middle ocean oceans old overweight posted sand sea seas seashore seashores shore shores speeding speedo style swimming teen-agers trend trends warning water waters years young youth 166381

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I love that your politics stink.

Victoria Roberts (8/7/2000)

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568

couple couples domestic husband husbands love man marriage married matrimony politics relationship relationships sidewalk stink talking walk wife wives woman 166382

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This is where things started getting really weird.

Frank Cotham (8/7/2000)

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569

before boss bosses business businessman businessmen chart charts conference conferences corporate does executive executives functions general graph graphs incompetents line loop meeting meetings office offices plummeting points professional professionals statistic statistics weird work working works 166383

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Tom Cheney (8/7/2000)

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570

all attica been cell cells convict convicts crime crimes criminal criminals dannemora hes incarcerated jail jails jolie joliet journey journeys leavenworth leisure pennants posters prison prisoner prisoners prisons rahway sing tourism tourist tourists travel traveling travels trip trips vacation vacations 166384

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Would you like to have a drink with me after


the genocide panel?

Edward Koren (8/7/2000)

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571

behind boyfriend boyfriends conference conferences convention couple couples date dates dating death flirtations genocide girlfriend girlfriends love man pickups propositions reads relationship relationships scenes sign sign-in standing table talking them welcome woman 166385

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

When we agreed that you would move in,


Mr. Goodrich, you didnt mention Rex.

George Booth (8/7/2000)

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572

age animal animals bed bedroom boyfriend boyfriends couple couples date dates dating general girlfriend girlfriends he's horse horses man nearby number racing relationship relationships scenes small sports standing talking there's wearing woman 166386

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Id give you the moon and stars, Felicia, but I dont


know where youd put them.

Michael Maslin (8/7/2000)

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573

apartment boyfriend boyfriends collection collections couple couples crowded date dates dating general gift gifts girlfriend girlfriends love man moon present presents professes put relationship relationships scenes stars urban woman 166387

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

A pleasure, Hargrove. Finally, a C.E.O. who


looks like a C.E.O.

Lee Lorenz (8/7/2000)

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574

another boss bosses business businessman businessmen conference conferences corporate dressed executive executives fashion greets introductions look looking looks meeting meetings men office offices older one professional professionals similarly work working works 166388

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I got it from eBay.

Ken Krimstein (8/7/2000)

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575

auction auctions child children computer computers dad dads drives families family farm father fathers friends huge internet into kid kids living merchandise mom moms mother mothers parent parents room rural show son sons technology tractor tractors woman young youth 166389

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh, just picking up the pieces of my life after


a really traumatic haircut.

Robert Mankoff (8/7/2000)

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576

age another appearance appearances barber barbers businessman businessmen corner cosmetologist cosmetologists cosmetology couple couples cut cuts cutting divorce divorced divorces divorcing domestic fashion hair haircut haircuts hairdo hairdos hairstyle hairstyles hat husband husbands life marriage married matrimony men middle one relationship relationships salon salons shop shops speaks street style styles stylist stylists traumatic wearing wife wives 166390

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This place is one of New Yorks best-kept secrets.

Mick Stevens (8/7/2000)

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577

best-kept boyfriend boyfriends cities city couple couples cuisine date dates dating deserted dines dining food general girlfriend girlfriends large manhattan meal meals menu menus n.y. n.y.c. new ny nyc order ordering orders otherwise regional relationship relationships restaurant restaurants service swanky urban waiter waiters york 166391

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh, by the way, your three-oclock got squashed.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (8/7/2000)

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578

animals ant appointments behind boss bosses business businessman businessmen conference conferences corporate death executive executives insects leaf meeting meetings office offices professional professionals receptionists reports secretary squashed standing talking work workers working works 166392

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hows this for a romantic moonlit interlude?

Jack Ziegler (8/7/2000)

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579

boats boyfriend boyfriends couple couples date dates dating general girlfriend girlfriends incompetents love man passenger relationship relationships romantic scenes ships smaller speaking speedboat tears terrified through water woman yachts 166393

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Thats not white noise. Thats the ocean.

Christopher Weyant (8/7/2000)

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580

beach beaches father fathers hand-in-hand nature noise ocean oceans sand sea seas seashore seashores shore shores son sons swimming technology walks water waters white 166394

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And God bless Mr. Chus Szechuan Palace.

David Sipress (8/7/2000)

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581

blesses catholic catholicism chef chefs chinese christ christian christianity cook cooking cuisine dining dinner during eat eating father food general god grace meal meals menu menus order ordering orders pray prayer prayers praying prays provided religion religious restaurant restaurants their which 166395

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its a very rare diseaseit doesnt have a cure.


It doesnt even have a spokesperson.

Barbara Smaller (8/7/2000)

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582

cure disease diseases doctor doctor's doctors exam examination examinations exams fitness health hospital hospitals hype ill illness man media medical patient patients physician physicians politics rare room sick sickness spokesperson talking waiting woman 166396

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (8/7/2000)

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583

achievement ahh all any anybody argue argues arguing argument arguments asks bananas battle bite bother cant chast child children coming completely consider cook cooking crowning crunch cuisine dad dads daughter daughters day dining dont each eat eating even fact families family father fathers fig fighting fights final find food fruit give green guest here high-i honeydew husband ill inedible just kid kids know like man many melons mocks mom moms mother mothers mushy namby-pamby natures new newtons oh oreos
other other's out parent parents peekskill peekskilla people pepper peppers person points problem problems replies roz says scientists side sit snap some son sons soon sweet table taste taunt them there things third thrilla tolerate too turns want wars whose wife woman wuss york young youth yugghh 166397

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

In the interest of fairness to the Democrats, Im not going


to waste my time on their convention either.

Jack Ziegler (8/14/2000)

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584

bush campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates civil congress democratic election elections front general george gore gov government governments man media news official party platform political politicians politics president presidential presidents republican senate sit sofa talking television tv waste wife 166398

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sure Im Alfred the Great now, but in high school


I couldnt get a date.

Charles Barsotti (8/14/2000)

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585

analyst boyfriend boyfriends confesses couch couple couples date dates dating ego girlfriend girlfriends high king lying now patient patients psychiatrist psychiatrists psychiatry psychologist psychologists psychology relationship relationships royalty school session social teenagers therapist therapists therapy 166399

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I adore the beauty and tranquillity of these


raw-sewage days.

Jack Ziegler (8/14/2000)

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586

another beach beaches career careers conservation deserted ecology environment health job jobs lake lakes leisure lifeguard nature occupation occupations ocean oceans one polluted pollution raw sand sea seas seashore seashores seasons sewage shore shores summer swimming water waters work worker workers working works 166400

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Come. Sit. Speak.

Michael Maslin (8/14/2000)

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587

animals boss bosses business businessman businessmen command commands conference conferences corporate dog dogs employee enters executive executives general gives hierarchy human master masters meeting meetings office offices pets professional professionals talking trained work working works 166401

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This family is way too functional.

Mick Stevens (8/14/2000)

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588

adolescent beat beatniks child children dad dads daughter daughters dinner dressed dysfunctional families family fashion father fathers functional gap generation hippies kid kids mom moms mother mothers normal parent parents punks radically rebel rebellion sitting son sons table teen-agers young youth 166402

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Youll need to find another attorney. Im going to prison.

Leo Cullum (8/14/2000)

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589

attorney attorneys cell cells client clients crime crimes criminal criminals ethics find finding general jail jails law lawyer lawyers legal prison prisoner prisoners prisons speaks 166403

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Whats her working title?

Edward Koren (8/14/2000)

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590

babies baby babys bedside birth child children dad dads daughter daughters families family father fathers friends gave general hospital inquire just kid kids media mom moms mother mothers movies name names new newborn newborns parent parents son sons title working young youth 166404

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

John OBrien (8/14/2000)

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591

amusement automobiles autos becomes car cars carnival cars circus compact driver driving economy entertainment fair fairs foreign general like limo limousines look midget mirror mirrors park parks parks reflected reflection small sport stretch sunroof trick waves white 166405

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (8/14/2000)

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592

asked atop bed cheese covers crust dining entirely every extra food instance into just made menu menus more order ordering orders parlor parlors pie pizza plus possible putting questions regular restaurant restaurants service spans stuffed ton waiter waiters wall with 166406

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Forget that! Weve just been hired to reinvent Al Gore.

Lee Lorenz (8/14/2000)

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593

abandon above assistant campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates civil congress dr election elections favor frankenstein government governments helping hunchbacked media monster official perched phone platform political politicians politics president presidential presidents reinvent scientists senate talking their vice-pres washington 166407

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I still manage to find the time to drink eight


glasses of water a day.

Frank Cotham (8/14/2000)

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594

alcohol alcoholic alcoholics another bar bars cocktail cocktails drink drinking drinks drunk drunks fitness general grizzled health inebriated intoxicated liquor man men nutrition one pub talk talking tavern taverns time tramps two water 166408

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

How am I this morning? Frankly, Mister Never-Around,


Im as horny as the middle-school band.

Michael Crawford (8/14/2000)

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595

age band couple couples education elderly fights general high horny husband husbands kitchen love man marital marriage married matrimony relationship relationships school sex sexual stand talk talking their wife wives woman 166409

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Not at all. Were just breeding contempt.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (8/14/2000)

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596

argue argues arguing argument arguments breed contempt couch couple couples family fighting fights general husband husbands late-middle-aged living man marital marriage married matrimony nearby opposite phone problem problems reading relationship relationships room side sits sitting talking telephones wife wives 166410

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Weve voted you off the island.

Peter Steiner (8/14/2000)

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597

alligator animals bear bible biblical bird character characters game lion literature media monkey myth mythical myths other popular refers shows sitcom speaking stories story survivor talking television tv unicorn unicorns vote 166411

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Wow . . . We could really fill this room with


uncomfortable silences.

Alex Gregory (8/14/2000)

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598

agent agents apartment apartments couple couples empty estate fireplace home homes house houses husband husbands interiors large man marriage married matrimony problem problems real relationship relationships silence speaks talks wife wives 166412

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im as surprised as you are. I had no idea


that the sweetheart deal would include an
actual sweetheart.
J.B. Handelsman (8/14/2000)

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599

beret blonde boyfriend boyfriends business businessman businessmen comes couple couples daddies date dates dating executives general girlfriend girlfriends home jargon love middle-aged miniskirt nonplused relationship relationships scenes side sugar surprise surprised sweetheart talking triangles wife woman young 166413

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If its not safe to go in the water and its not safe


to go in the sun, why did you bring me here?

William Haefeli (8/14/2000)

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600

beach beaches being both child children complains depletion due general leisure limits mom not ocean oceans off ozone pollution safe sand sea seas seashore seashores shore shores sit sun swimming umbrella under water waters when young 166414

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Thanks, Super Rich Man.

David Sipress (8/14/2000)

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601

bag beggars budget budgets dollar economy finance finances general give hero heroes income money people poor presents rich riches sack superhero superheroes superman wealth wealthy 166415

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Bathroom? Sure, its just down the hall to the left,


jog right, left, another left, straight past two more
lefts, then right, and its at the end of the third
corridor on your right.

Pat Byrnes (8/14/2000)

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602

bathrooms direction directions experiment experiments friend general gives guest guests home homes house household interiors lab laboratories laboratory labs mazes mice mouse visiting visitor visitors 166416

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Barry Blitt (8/14/2000)

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603

animals baseball best bugs canines cliche cliches dog doggie dogs expressions friend insects language man's pet pets play political politics pooch president puppies puppy sport sports word words 174424

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Charles Barsotti (8/21/2000)

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604

agreed all board boss bosses business businessman businessmen cheerleaders conference conferences corporate football helmets hire its meeting meetings office offices professional professionals sports vote well wearing work working works yea 166417

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mets or Yankees?

Joseph Farris (8/21/2000)

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605

arriving athlete athletes baseball cities city couple d dining fancy game games general maitre manhattan n.y. n.y.c. new ny nyc player players pretentious regional restaurant restaurants service sport sports team teams urban waiter waiters york 166418

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Wait a minuteI know theres something weve


forgotten to worry about.

Robert Mankoff (8/21/2000)

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606

anxiety domestic general go home homes house houses husband journey journeys leave leisure nervous problems psychology seasons speaks summer their tourism tourist tourists travel traveling travels trip trips vacation vacations wife worry 166419

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (8/21/2000)

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607

ball club clubs course courses forty-seven game games golf golfer golfers golfing golfs hole hole-in-forty-seven holes incompetents leisure night out putt score scores seven sports still sumner trying 166420

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Some of the poor wretches eventually become unable


to leave the safety of their cubicles.

Gahan Wilson (8/21/2000)

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608

boss bosses business businessmen career careers cubicle cubicles employee employees employer employers general hairy head job jobs life management modern occupation occupations office out past pokes prison prisoners profession professions scared two walking which work worker workers working works wretches 166421

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And I dont want to hear any of this There are no cameras


following us so whats the point? stuff.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (8/21/2000)

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609

camp camps chides children counselor ego entertainment fame famous general group hands hips into kids media out program programs reality seasonal show shows summer survivor taken television televisions there tv tvs vacation vacations whats woods 166422

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

David Sipress (8/21/2000)

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610

captionless cemeteries death entertainment general grave graves graveyard he headstone husbands language leisure men program programs reads relationships show shows sports television televisions tv tvs visiting watch watched watching woman 166423

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ill be the headlights, you be the deer.

Victoria Roberts (8/21/2000)

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611

animals another automobiles cliche cliches deer expression expressions eyes fear female game games general headlights language leisure net one phrase phrases play player sports talking tennis word 166424

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Is that an inflatable sea horse, or are you


just glad to see me?

Michael Maslin (8/21/2000)

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612

around attraction beach beaches cliche cliches expression expressions flirt flirting flirts lake lakes leisure mae man ocean oceans raft rafts relationships sea seas seashore seashores sex shore shores speaks stand swimming toys waist water waters west woman 166425

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Danny Shanahan (8/21/2000)

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613

age back ball baseball between boss cat come cracker crime criminals dont game gangster gangsters general jack just kill killer killers killing lap mafia mob murder murderer murderers murders out peanuts saying see songs sports take taken takes talks the them thugs two victim violence whatever 166426

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The body is eighty-two-per-cent broth.

Leo Cullum (8/21/2000)

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614

animals barnyard birds broth chicken chickens composition cooking dining discuss farm food health hen hens livestock nutrition percentages physical poultry science talking their two water 166427

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (8/21/2000)

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615

beach beaches chowders complains cook cuisine customer dining eat eating environment fly food low meal meals medical menu menus order ordering orders other our pollution restaurant restaurants saying service soup swimming syringe theres troubled waiter waiters waste 166428

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Honey, I still think youre the greatest.

Frank Cotham (8/21/2000)

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616

arrest arrested away cop cops couch couple couples crime criminal criminals domestic general hauled husband husbands marriage married matrimony offers officers police policeman policemen relationship relationships she support verbal while wife wives 166429

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Kellanay seems to be making real progress with his


split-fingered fastball.

Lee Lorenz (8/21/2000)

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617

age anger another ball baseball bounced club executives fast geezer general group groups head just maliciously-thrown member members mens off old-fashioned one progress remarks sports third violence 166430

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Arnie Levin (8/21/2000)

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618

ad ads advertising all animals business captionless cars character characters commercial commercials endorsement endorsements hare like line literature over race races shell sports stand start stickers stories story tortoise 166431

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

He looks very promisingbut lets see how he


does on the written test.

Sidney Harris (8/21/2000)

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619

box boxer boxers boxing education fight fights general men next prizefighter prizefighters promising ring rings round rounds sports talking tests two 166432

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Gotta be an implant.

Alex Gregory (8/21/2000)

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620

beer bellies belly breast check construction distance drinking fat fitness general gut implant implants large macho medical out people plastic pot small standing stomach surgery third tummy two workers workmen 166433

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hey, kids! Grandpas on TV.

Edward Frascino (8/21/2000)

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621

animal animals ball balls death entertainment families family football general generation glasses grandfathers leather mumu next pig pigs pigskin pork program programs relationships shouts show showing shows sports standing television televisions tv tvs wearing 166434

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Marisa Acocella (8/21/2000)

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622

actress all attractive bar barkin bars billionaire boyfriend boyfriends celebrities come cosmetics couple couples currently daddies date dates dating divorce divorces ellen expensive general girlfriend girlfriends glamorous gone hollywood images many marriage marry mental money people perelman prince relationship relationships revlon rich ron slated someday standing sugar thinking three through tycoon will women young 166435

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Innocence is no excuse.

J.B. Handelsman (8/21/2000)

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623

court courtroom courtrooms courts crime defendant defendants defense excuse ignorance innocent judge judges law life man modern problems refers sentences trial trials 166436

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Toupee!

Sam Gross (8/21/2000)

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624

cartoon duel dueling duels epee famous fashion fence fencer fencing fight fighting fights hair honor james joust language lifts may men off opponent play refer sports sword thurber thurbers touch toupees violence wig wigs word 166437

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Am I boring you, kid?

Charles Barsotti (8/21/2000)

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625

age bore boring child children dad dads families family father fathers fish fishing general hooks kid kids mom moms mother mothers mouth ocean oceans parent parents sea seas son sons sports water young younger youth 166438

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (8/21/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

626

bacon caf chef chefs class concrete cook cooking cuisine dining dogs eat eating eggs food fried general grizzled hot low offers restaurant restaurants sidewalk summer urban vendor vendors 166439

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Michael Crawford (8/21/2000)

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627

additional architecture automobiles basketball bird birdhouse birdhouses birds car communities community garage general home homes hoop house household households houses like looks neighbor neighborhood neighborhoods residential residents returning sports suburban suburbs two wing 166440

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its a very senior momenthes dead.

Peter Steiner (8/21/2000)

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628

age aging death deceased diagnosis disease diseases doctor doctors fitness gives health hospital hospitals ill illness medical official old patient patients patients physician physicians relative seniors sick sickness 166441

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Perhaps, given time, but not too much time,


you could learn to love me.

Mick Stevens (8/21/2000)

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629

age boyfriend boyfriends couple couples daddies date dates dating death general girlfriend girlfriends love man play problems relationship relationships restaurant restaurants sitting sugar time together woman word young 166442

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (8/21/2000)

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630

ain't although amelia's anything around atheist back bad beer big both bring brought but butt can't chast chicken child children clearly coach communist competitive consoling course crazed cut day days deal did doing domestic don't done dropped eighths else enthusiastic erica's especially even ever everybody face facts field finally find finish five flogged forty free fun game games general gonna had have haven't he's head here hip hooray house huge i if into janet join just kid label last lately leagues least like live longer
loop lost mean means might minutes mom momma's moms morning mothers move neither not now one oranges other our out over page parent past peewee play playing publicly quadrillions quit rsistance roz running seen seventeen shoe' six small snack so soccer sort sports starts suburban suburbia sunday swear takin team tee-vee that's then there this time timmy too tournaments town travel trevor trivializations turn twenty-two vive was watch weekend weeks well went were weren't what when where which why wish
without won worse would you'll youth 166443

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ive come for your tires.

Mick Stevens (9/4/2000)

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631

accidents answering apparently auto automobile automobiles autos car cars caused death door firestone general grim have holding iron man many part reaper recall refers tire tires vehicle vehicles which 166447

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Were not year-round people, weekend people, or summer


people. Were last-ten-days-in-August people.

David Sipress (9/4/2000)

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632

another august beach beaches blanket couple days family last leisure ocean oceans people sand sea seas seashore seashores shore shores summer summers swimming ten umbrella under vacations water waters 166448

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its not really serious, but I am seeing


another anchor.

Michael Crawford (9/4/2000)

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633

adultery affairs anchor attraction bar boyfriend boyfriends couple couples date dates dating directly front girlfriend girlfriends journalism love man media news press problems relationship relationships serious sex sitting speaking television woman 16644 9

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (9/4/2000)

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634

aisles children consumerism cruelty education elementary flash forget high items school shopping store summer supplies taunt time us vacation walks youngster youth 166445

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I recommend an aggressive form of throwing money at me.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (9/4/2000)

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635

client clients doctor doctors ethics finance finances fitness general greed health hospital hospitals income medical money office patient patients physician physicians talking 166450

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Let the healing begin!

David Sipress (9/4/2000)

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636

begin disease diseases doctor doctors exam examination examinations examining exams fitness heal healing health hospital hospitals ill illness language medical patient patients physician physicians play sick sickness table word 166451

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

No, no, your jobs not going out of the country to


some foreign bastard. Were just firing you.

Charles Barsotti (9/4/2000)

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637

agreement american bastard boss bosses business businessmen career careers employee employees employer employers executives fire firing free general hierarchy job jobs life management mexico modern nafta north occupation occupations office profession professions talking trade unemployment work worker workers working works 166452

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Really? I never heard of a Cheshire dog.

Lee Lorenz (9/4/2000)

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638

alice animals another big carroll cat character characters dog dogs general grin lewis literature man one pets stories story walking whose wonderland writing 166453

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Would you like to come up for a margarita?

Danny Shanahan (9/4/2000)

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639

alcohol apartment boyfriend boyfriends building cocktail cocktails costumes couple couples date dates dating drinking fashion front general girlfriend girlfriends hats- large man margaritas mexicans mexico relationship relationships social sombrero sombreros trends wearing woman 166454

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Please talk about Bush and GoreI want to


see your eyebrows dance.

Michael Maslin (9/4/2000)

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640

breakfast campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates civil congress election elections eyebrows george gov government governments husband marriage official platform political politicians politics president presidential presidents relationships senate table talk talking wife 166455

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Youre making more at this firm than anyone else


whose brain is the size of a walnut.

Leo Cullum (9/4/2000)

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641

across angry animals boss bosses brains business career careers desk employee employees employer employers executives hierarchy income job jobs looking man management medical occupation occupations office profession professions rabbit rabbits raise salaries salary suit talking walnuts work worker workers working works 166456

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I got rid of all the excess in my life.

Eldon Dedini (9/4/2000)

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642

bench benches bum bums excess figure figures fitness life man modern park parks problems psychology sitting stick tramp tramps walking 166457

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Some of it is soft and some of it is hard, but the


main thing is that all of it is money.

J.B. Handelsman (9/4/2000)

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643

budget budgets dollar economics economy ethics falling finance finances government greed guest guests income mingle mingling money overflowing parties party pockets politician politics rich riches social socialize socializing talking wealth wealthy woman 166446

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Why did you become a crusader? You dont


even go to church.

Frank Cotham (9/4/2000)

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644

ancient another barbarians bible biblical career careers catholic catholicism christ christian christianity church clergy crusaders general god history horseback job jobs medieval occupation occupations one religion religious solders soldier times violence war warrior warriors work working 166458

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Youve reached 911, and theres someone here


who wants to say hello.

Alex Gregory (9/4/2000)

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645

animal animals call caller calling calls cat cats communicate communicates communication communications general incompetents life master masters modern operator pet pets phone phones police problems puts relationship relationships telephone telephones 166459

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (9/4/2000)

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646

age aging bible captionless cloud commandments delivers emerges eye eyeglasses field fitness forget forgetful glasses god hand hands holding memory moses optical optometrist problems reading religion sight squinting ten visions 166460

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

AS YOU BIKE IT (1 of 5)

Bicycles can be ridden on the street . . .

Arnold Roth (9/4/2000)

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647

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

AS YOU BIKE IT (2 of 5)

. . . or on the sidewalk.

Arnold Roth (9/4/2000)

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648

art artist artistic artwork city crime criminal criminals crook manhattan mug mugger mugging neighborhoods new nyc regional rob robber robbery thief thieves urban york 174427

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

AS YOU BIKE IT (3 of 5)

Bicycles can be parked artistically in any civilized home.

Arnold Roth (9/4/2000)

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649

art artist artistic artwork city crime criminal criminals crook manhattan mug mugger mugging neighborhoods new nyc regional rob robber robbery thief thieves urban york 174428

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

AS YOU BIKE IT (4 of 5)

When parked on the street, however, they must be secured.

Arnold Roth (9/4/2000)

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650

art artist artistic artwork city crime criminal criminals crook manhattan mug mugger mugging neighborhoods new nyc regional rob robber robbery thief thieves urban york 174429

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

AS YOU BIKE IT (5 of 5)

Even so . . .

Arnold Roth (9/4/2000)

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651

art artist artistic artwork city crime criminal criminals crook manhattan mug mugger mugging neighborhoods new nyc regional rob robber robbery thief thieves urban york 174430

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Before I read about my summer vacation, Id like to ask that


all pagers, beepers, and cell phones be turned off.

Danny Shanahan (9/11/2000)

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652

beepers call calling calls cell cellphone cellphones cells cellular class communicate communicates communication communications did education elementary essay front general girl hand language mobile phone phones play portable school speeches standing student students summer technology telephone telephones theatre vacation vacations what word writers young youth 166461

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

It might be considered a hate crime, so tell me honestly.


Did you shoot your husband because of his gender?

J.B. Handelsman (9/11/2000)

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653

attorney attorneys client clients couple couples crimes criminal criminals defendant defendants feminism gender general gun guns hate husband husbands kill killer killers killing law lawyer lawyers marriage married matrimony murder murderer murderers murders office relationship relationships talking violence weapon weapons wife wives woman 166462

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

So this is the famous environment everyones


so hyped up about?

David Sipress (9/11/2000)

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654

cliff conservation depletion ecology environment famous journey journeys landscape leisure life man modern nature overlooking pollution scenic stand talking tourism tourist tourists travel traveling travels trip trips vacation vacations woman 166463

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What do people write me off as?

William Haefeli (9/11/2000)

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655

after arriving coats esteem failure general guest guests home husbands incompetents insecurity man mingle mingling parties party problems psychology remove self social socialize socializing talking their woman write 166464

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Michael Crawford (9/11/2000)

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656

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2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Your mother wanted you to have this for


good luck. Its her foot.

Harry Bliss (9/11/2000)

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657

animals child children college dad dads daughter daughters death families family father fathers first foot general gift gifts kid kids leave lucky mom moms mother mothers myths parent parents present presents rabbit rabbits rabbits relationships semester son sons station talking train young youth 166466

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

A death mask, Ms. Barrow, with copies to


all department heads.

Danny Shanahan (9/11/2000)

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658

boss bosses business businessmen career careers dead death employee employees employer employers executive executives fire firing floor gun guns hierarchy holding job jobs kill killer killers killing management masks murder murderer murderers murders occupation occupations office problems profession professions secretary smoking talking unemployment violence weapon weapons work worker workers working works 166467

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Of course your daddy loves you. Hes on


Prozache loves everybody.

Leo Cullum (9/11/2000)

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659

antidepressant antidepressants armchair child children dad dads daughter depression drug drugs everybody families family father fathers fitness kid kids love medical mom moms mother mothers parent parents pill pills problems psychology relationships son sons talking woman young youth 166468

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

James Stevenson (9/11/2000)

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660

aerobic aerobics ancient bearer captionless doing exercise exercises exercising fitness general greek greeks health history leg legs life modern muscle muscles muscular olympic olympics pauses runner running sports stretch stretching torch torches 166469

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The people want more tennis, Your Majesty.

Mick Stevens (9/11/2000)

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661

balcony balls entertainment games king kingdom leader leaders leisure medieval minister mob politics problems royalty ruler rulers sports standing stone tennis them thrown times unseen want 166470

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im sure its nothing.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (9/11/2000)

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662

age aging back couple couples doctors domestic elderly enormous fitness hump hunchbacks husband husbands marriage married matrimony medical nothing osteoporosis patients problems relationship relationships street wife wives woman 166471

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ms agua for the gringos?

Jack Ziegler (9/11/2000)

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663

american americans cuisine dining eat eating food general gringos heat international language low mas meal meals menu menus mexican mexico more order ordering orders pepper pours regional restaurant restaurants service smoke spanish spices spicy suffering through tourists travel vacations waiter waiters water 166472

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (9/11/2000)

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664

all although another black but child children consumerism dad dads daughter daughters daughters define families family fashion father fathers fathers four general had ive journey journeys kid kids last leisure look mall malls members mom moms mother mothers mothers not one parent parents rather reads relationships sandals shirts shopping socks son sons sons t-shirts teen-aged teen-agers thats their tourism tourist tourists travel traveling travels trip trips vacation vacations wearing whatever young youth 166473

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I contributed a lot to charity when I thought


I was going to die.

Frank Cotham (9/11/2000)

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665

age aging another back budget budgets charity dead death dollar donate donations dying executive executives finance finances fitness greed income limo limousines medical money people rich riches speaking wealth wealthy 166474

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

eBay 99.

J.P. Rini (9/11/2000)

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666

auctions bottle computers consumerism customer drinking internet life modern outdoor presents service shopping table technology vintage waiter waiters wine year 166475

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

At this point, its still not classified as a hurricane


its still being called a raindrop.

Liza Donnelly (9/11/2000)

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667

broadcast broadcasting broadcasts camera cameraman entertainment extreme forecast holding hurricane jacket journalism life man media modern names news program programs rain raindrop reporter show shows storm storms talking television televisions tv tvs umbrella weather 166476

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

When you put on the uniform, you surrender


a part of yourself.

Victoria Roberts (9/11/2000)

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668

another athlete athletes career careers football game games leisure occupation occupations one player players psychology sport sports team teams uniforms 166477

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its Alan Greenspanhe thinks were moving too fast.

Alex Gregory (9/11/2000)

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669

bed bedroom beside boyfriend boyfriends couple couples date dates dating economy federal girlfriend girlfriends greenspans incompetents inflation interest life man modern phone rates recent refers relationship relationships remarks reserve scenes sex sexual talking woman 166478

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

J.C. Duffy (9/18/2000)

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670

beg beggars begging borders bum bums charitable charity couples cup doctors duffy general group holding home homeless homes house life living modern poor refers room says sign signs standing tin tramp tramps unemployed without 166479

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

O.K., the role youre auditioning for is a struggling actress


whos always boring people with stories of how this one or that
one got the part she deserved because shes younger or prettier.
Think you can handle it?

David Sipress (9/18/2000)

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671

act acting actor actors actress actresses acts auditions boring direction directions director directors entertainment hand handle incompetents manuscript media play plays problems speaking stage stages theatre 166480

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Marisa Acocella (9/18/2000)

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672

babies baby brand brands carriage children clothes clothing coo coochie desinger fashion fashions general goo goochie gucci infants label labels language leans life modern outfit over people play rich style styles tickle trend trends woman word 166481

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Myrna, Ive always loved you in animal prints.

Victoria Roberts (9/18/2000)

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673

animal been clothing explorers fabric fabrics fashion front general giant having husbands man material motif pattern prints problems purple red relationships reptile roberts snake snakes standing swallowed talking victoria woman womens 166482

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

It cuts air resistance.

Alex Gregory (9/18/2000)

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674

air another business businessmen clothing corner fashion fitting form general life man mens modern normal olympics resistance running speedo sports street styles suit swimsuits trend trends type urban wearing 166483

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

He said it will be hot and muggy early in the


week, with a slight chance of showers.

Christopher Weyant (9/18/2000)

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675

america aztec base giant group head hot inca island mayan mayans mexicans mexico muggy natives news pagan pagans peoples religion showers south stone talking television temple top weather 166484

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sorry, sir, were filming a truck commercial up here.

Nick Downes (9/18/2000)

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676

ad ads advertisement advertisements automobiles cliff cliffs climber climbers commercial commercials consumerism crew directors film general life media member modern mountain movies problems producers reach screenwriters sports television top trucks 166485

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Now theyre saying shiny things attached to


hooks are bad for you.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (9/18/2000)

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677

ama another bottom diet diets dining fish fishing fitness general health hooks medical nutrition ocean oceans one problems sea seas shiny water 166486

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Leo Cullum (9/18/2000)

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678

brown but campus captionless choice class classes classroom classrooms college course courses educated educating education fashion first general incompetents instructor instructors ivy league life new pupil pupils reads school schools shirts student students sweater sweatshirts teach teacher teachers teaches teaching universities university was wears yale 166487

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Heres the deal. In exchange for a ceasefire, theyll


share their technology.

Lee Lorenz (9/18/2000)

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679

age anger armfuls battles cavemen ceasefire clubs deal face fight fighting fights peace prehistoric problems rocks stone technology violence war wars weapons 166488

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I know Im wrong, but Im sure you can


make me more wrong.

Peter C. Vey (9/18/2000)

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680

argue argues arguing argument arguments couple couples fighting fights husband husbands language living man marital marriage married matrimony problem problems relationship relationships room talking wife wives woman wrong 166489

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Bobby Lindermannow, theres a doctor.

Danny Shanahan (9/18/2000)

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681

child children daughter daughters doctor doctors exam examination examinations examining exams families family fitness general girl health hospital hospitals kid kids life little medical modern mom moms mother mothers parent parents patient patients pediatrician pediatricians physician physicians sex table talking young youth 166490

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Inspected by #16.

Jack Ziegler (9/18/2000)

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682

athlete athletes brand brands clothes clothing fashion fashions football game games general images imagines incompetents inspecting inspection jersey jerseys label labels man mens mental numbers player players shirt shirts signs sport sports style styles tag trend trends wearing workers 166491

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I guess cats just cant appreciate Frank Gehry.

Eric Lewis (9/18/2000)

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683

animals architects architecture bilbao cat cats design designed designers dog dogs general guggenheim home homes house houses laughs museums sits spain talking 166492

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Touch that dial, Meatball, and Ill have Paulie pop


ya before we hit the tunnel!

Michael Crawford (9/18/2000)

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684

anger automobiles back crime criminals driver executions gangster gangsters general guy mafia mobster music other passenger pop-eyed problems radio seat threat threaten threats tunnels two type violence violent 166493

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (9/18/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

685

aggressive american anal-retentive analyst born but can character characteristics characters chast children compulsive-obsessive cream day days defies diagnosis dont every find fridays from general get given had hed here huffins hypochondriacal ice just keep kid know leprosy literature make maniacal mashed miss mom mondays non-attentive nursery passive- passive-aggressive patient patients peas person plain please potatoes probably psychiatric psychiatrist psychiatrists psychiatry psychological psychologist psychologists psychology repeat rhyme rhymes right roz sabbath said saturdays session shirt society some something stories story tale tales tendencies therapist therapists therapy think thursdays too touching trampoline tuesdays want way well wednesdays week what whos why 166494

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

No, I dont want to know what my approval rating is.

Dana Fradon (9/25/2000)

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686

approval cats chair child children dad dads daughter daughters dogs easy families family father fathers general kid kids know knowing mom moms mother mothers newspaper parent parents politics polls relationships son sons surveys talking television wives young youth 166496

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

No, thank you, I already have a moat.

Charles Barsotti (9/25/2000)

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687

architecture call calling calls castle castles communicate communicates communication communications consumer consumerism estate general home homes house king moats phone phones real royalty sales talking telemarketer telephone telephones 166497

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This next number goes out to all the little people


I met on my way back down.

J.C. Duffy (9/25/2000)

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688

bar duffy entertainer entertainers entertainment entertains failure feelings introduces music musician musicians performer performers pianists piano player psychology 166498

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

As you can see, weve transferred your husband from


intensive to casual care.

Gahan Wilson (9/25/2000)

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689

bed care casual doctor drink general hawaiian health holding hospital hospitals husbands ill illness intensive leisure life male medical modern patient relaxation shirt shirts sick sickness tropical vacations visitor wearing 166499

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Your priorities change once you get a new toy.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (9/25/2000)

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690

adult babies boy child children consumerism dad dads daughter daughters doorstep families family father fathers friend games general kid kids mature mom moms mother mothers parent parents priorities psychology relationships son sons talking toys young youth 166500

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Lee Lorenz (9/25/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

691

campaigns centrist conservative cuisine dining dog dogs food franks hot language liberal low merchant merchants play political politics reads street umbrella vend vender venders vending vendor vendors vends word 166501

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (9/25/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

692

business carefully conversation conversations discussion discussions general gossip gossiping gossipmongers gossips happily headphones listen messages mill office people room rumor run stocking talk talking then wearing workers 166502

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Release the hounds! Thats your answer to everything.

Pat Byrnes (9/25/2000)

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693

age animal animals another answer answers chair cliches dog dogs easy everything general hunting language man one people play release rich talking wealth wealthy word 166503

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (9/25/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

694

april back-to-school break breather christmas christmas hanukkah class classes classroom classrooms closed closings columbus day days december easter educated educating education fall february few fiction future general holidays instructor instructors january june last leave life list march may modern month november october open out pre-spring presidents pupil pupils recess replies says school schoolchild schools science september spring student students teach teacher teachers teaches teaching thanksgiving this title
vacation vacations very week well winter works 166504

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If we werent bare-assed wed really clean up


on sportswear endorsements.

Edward Frascino (9/25/2000)

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695

ancient another athlete athletes clothes consumerism endorsements fashion field greece greek history ironic irony javelin money naked nude olympics one people regional sports sportswear thrower track trends 166505

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

As soon as vacations over, off it comes.

Danny Shanahan (9/25/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

696

animals another beard beards cat cats extra facial fashion female general goatee-like growing hair having leisure mate men moustache moustaches mustache mustaches one speaking talking vacations whiskers 166506

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

So, have you two been doing anything reproductive?

Marisa Acocella (9/25/2000)

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697

babies child children couple couples dad dads daughter daughters domestic families family father fathers general grandchildren husband husbands kid kids marriage married matrimony mom moms mother mothers parent parents pregnancy pregnant relationship relationships reproductive restaurant sex son sons table wife wives young youth 166507

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The names Bond. Duane Bond.

Michael Crawford (9/25/2000)

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698

age briefcase casino character characters cliche cliches entertainment expression expressions fashion fictional fleming gambling games guy himself ian introduces introductions ironic irony james literature middle movies nerdy pants plaid pocket protector relationships shirt striped wearing writing 166508

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Yes, it will be a clean needle.

Frank Cotham (9/25/2000)

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699

after attorney attorneys clean client clients convicted court courtroom courtrooms courts crime death defendant defendants disease drug drugs executions felon injection judge judges law lawyer lawyers lethal life modern needles passing sentence std stds syringes talking trial trials 166509

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh, no! Golf-ball-sized hail!

Mick Stevens (9/25/2000)

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700

cart club clubs course courses game games golf golf-ball-sized golfer golfers golfing golfs hail hole holes leisure problems ride sports storm through two weather 166510

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The entire West Coast division must go. Make it


look like an accident.

Leo Cullum (9/25/2000)

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701

accidents business california crime criminals desk drugs executive executives fire firing gangster gangsters hierarchy mafia management mobster pharmaceutical problems regional sitting talking violence 166511

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

God may count the tears of women, but if from that he


subtracts the sighs of men were back to ground zero.

Victoria Roberts (9/25/2000)

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702

book chair count discussing easy feminism fights general ground husband marital marriage men newspapers philosophy poem poems poet poetic poetry poets psychology reading relationships religion sighs talking tears wife women zero 166512

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Welcome to All About the Media, where members of the media


discuss the role of the media in media coverage of the media.

David Sipress (9/25/2000)

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703

all armchair broadcast broadcasting broadcasts discussion editor editors entertainment general journalism journalist language life man media modern news panel play press program programs reporter reporters show shows sitting television televisions tv tvs watching word 166513

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

John OBrien (10/2/2000)

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704

after bare-breasted chasing device entertainer entertainers entertainment entertains female gives history male marionette naughty performer performers punishment puppets puritan puritans religion satyr-like sex show stage stages stocks 166514

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Just sign it To the Lucky High Bidder.

Danny Shanahan (10/2/2000)

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705

auctions author authors autographs book book-signing books bookstores consumerism ebay essay essays fiction general greed internet literature meet money novel novels publication publications publishing signs speaking stories story woman writer writers 166515

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Miss Parker, you have my permission to shoot anyone


who tries to enter my office on a scooter.

Tom Cheney (10/2/2000)

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706

assistant assistants boss bosses business businessman businessmen children conference conferences corporate disheveled executive executives games intercom into leisure meeting meetings office offices professional professionals receptionist receptionists scooters secretaries secretary shoot speaks work workers working works 166516

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its not what it looks like, Margaret.

J.C. Duffy (10/2/2000)

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707

adultery affair affairs animals benches birds confronted couple couples duffy feeding feeds love man marriage married park pigeon pigeons relationship relationships scenes triangles usually 166517

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The inspiring story of one familys incredible journey


from a two-bedroom condo on West Sixty-sixth Street
to a three-bedroom co-op on East Eighty-third.

David Sipress (10/2/2000)

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708

author authors back book books cities city critic criticism critics critique essay essays estate families fiction general inspiring literature man manhattan n.y. n.y.c. new novel novels ny nyc publication publications publishing reads real regional review reviews stories story synopsis urban writer writers writing york 166518

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And then youll want to take the No. 2 or 3 train


to right here behind this very accommodating
passive-aggressive womans head.
Michael Crawford (10/2/2000)

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709

aggressive blocking businessmen commute commuter commuters commuting directions front look map maps men passive- platform platforms psychobabble psychology sexes sitting slightly subway subways their train trains transit transportation two view woman 166519

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Are all Brits bisexual, or just the ones who


publish their diaries?

Victoria Roberts (10/2/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

710

autobiographies autobiography bisexual books diaries england europe general husband kenneth memoir paper publishers reads relationships sex sexual speaking tynan woman writing 166520

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I was just trying to brush him back.

Marisa Acocella (10/2/2000)

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711

arresting athlete athletes baseball brush forced game games gun guns hand handgun kill killer killers killing leisure mound murder murderer murderers murders over pitcher player players police policemen sport sports team teams two violence violent weapon weapons 166521

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (10/2/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

712

bellies belly big consumerism down fashion fat fitness health large man men next obese people reads shirts size stomach street style styles t-shirt thing trend trends walks wearing weight 166522

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Dumbledore smiled, his eyes twinkling.

J.B. Handelsman (10/2/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

713

author authors bed bedroom book books characters child children dad dads daughter daughters essay essays families family father fathers fiction harry kid kids lie literature mom moms mother mothers night novel novels parent parents potter publication publications publishing reading reads rest scenes sleep stories story writer writers writing young youth 166523

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The Times called his novel downloadable.

Mike Twohy (10/2/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

714

around author authors book books computer computers copy critic criticism critics critique download downloadable e-books essay essays fiction happily holding internet journalism jumping king literature media new news newspaper newspapers novel novels paper papers periodical periodicals publication publications publishing regional stephen stories story technology times writer writers writing york 166524

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (10/2/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

715

after athlete athletes awards bronze competition fights first game games general gold hits lose loser losers loses losing medalist olympics place player players second sport sports stand team teams third together violence win winner winners winning wins 166525

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

It keeps him from hitting on women.

William Hamilton (10/2/2000)

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716

animals attraction cocktail collar couple couples dogs flirt flirtations flirting flirts general head husband husbands limit love man marriage married matrimony medical movement parties party pets pickups protective relationship relationships scenes their torture type usually wearing wife wives worn 166526

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

My God, whats wrong? You look like you


were caught in the headlights.

Arnie Levin (10/2/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

717

animals arrives automobiles boss bosses briefcase-bearing business career careers cliche cliches coming couple couples deer deer's employee employees employer employers expression expressions general home husband husbands job jobs marriage married matrimony occupation occupations office phrase phrases relationship relationships startled talking wife wives work worker workers working works 166527

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Peter C. Vey (10/2/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

718

bible biblical boss bosses career careers commandments employee employees employer employers ethics fun gives god have heaven job jobs morality moses occupation occupations parable parables religion speaking ten work worker workers working works 166528

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im sorryhere I am going on and on and I havent


asked you a thing about being caught in a trap.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (10/2/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

719

animals couple couples gossip gossiping husband husbands marriage married matrimony mice mouse one relationship relationships second stress talking trap wife wives 166529

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

When did men become women?

William Haefeli (10/2/2000)

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720

articles browses diets fashion features fitness health husband magazine magazines mans media men periodical periodicals publication publishing relationships talking weight which wife women world 166530

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The flight time today is five hours in first class


and twelve and a half in coach.

Leo Cullum (10/2/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

721

airline airplane airplanes announcement beginning class coach first flight flights fling fly high leisure light luxury makes money pilot plane planes schedules status time travel wealth 166531

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Do these shoes taste funny to you?

Frank Cotham (10/2/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

722

animals another chew clothes clothing cuisine dining dog dogs eat eating fetching food funny general mouths one owner's pet pets shoes style talking taste their things trend trends 166532

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hold that thoughtIve just got two chapters to go.

Robert Mankoff (10/2/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

723

bed bedroom books caress couple couples husband husbands man marriage married matrimony read reading reads relationship relationships scenes sex sexual she starts wife wives 166533

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hit em right after they won the lottery.

Gahan Wilson (10/2/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

724

accidetns accient budget budgets contests crushed disaster disasters em emergency finance finances home homes houes house look lottery luck men meteor meteors money people rich riches space two wealth wealthy 166534

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (10/2/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

725

after almost amazing author authors bears beauty being better book books children childrens couple dwarfs essay essays even fairy fiction flu four general goldilocks groggy half have identical irregular limited literature lower maybe not-so-subtle notice novel novels off-white offered only original plot popular price publication publications publishing rates reading readings regular savings seven shifts sleeping slightly snow stories story supplies swear tales than three white wont writer writers 166535

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Please remind your mom and dad that its a


parent-teacher conference, not a parentteacher-attorney conference.
Barbara Smaller (10/2/2000)

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726

attorney attorneys child children class classes classroom classrooms client clients dad dads daughter daughters educated educating education elementary families family father fathers instructor instructors kid kids lawyer lawyers legal mom moms mother mothers one parent parents pupil pupils remind school schools son sons speaking student students teach teacher teachers teaches teaching young youth 166536

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

George Booth (10/2/2000)

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727

author authors book books bookstores consumerism crammed customer essay essays fiction general greets home homes house houses inside junk literature more novel novels outside plenty potential publication publications publishing rafters stores stories story theres woman writer writers writing 166537

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Trust me. Its not a God-given right.

Sam Gross (10/9/2000)

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728

afterlife afterlives amendment angel angles cloud clouds death enter firearm gates guns heaven life man modern pearly peter problems right saint second st. talking trying violence weapon weapons 166538

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Lighten up, honey. You use performance-enhancing drugs!

Mike Twohy (10/9/2000)

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729

addictions age aging criticism enhancing husband medical olympics performance problems relationships sex speaking sports steroids television viagra watching wife 166539

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

John OBrien (10/9/2000)

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730

astronomers bottle bottles caption coca-cola coke cola consumer consumerism general giant glasses night science sky space star stars telescope telescopes use vision 166540

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Just finishing the roll?

Victoria Roberts (10/9/2000)

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731

cameras family general hobbies husband husbands marriage photo photographs picture pictures portrait relationships take talking wife 166541

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

O.K., Im ready. You can let it go.

Charles Barsotti (10/9/2000)

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732

animal animals cuisine customer dining general lions low meal meals menu menus nature order ordering orders ready restaurant restaurants service talking tigers tray uncover waiter waiters 166542

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (10/9/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

733

angry around beat beatniks blank boycotting caption carriers cause demonstrating demonstrations four general generation government hippies incompetents labor magic marker markers obstacles opinion picket picketer picketers picketing pickets problems protest protester protesters protesting punks rallies rebel rebels show sign signs stand strike strikers strikes union unions without 166543

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im not ordering any lunch, CaswellIm going to eat yours.

Lee Lorenz (10/9/2000)

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734

away boss business businessmen competitor cuisine dining eat eating employee food general hierarchy life lunch management meal meals meaning menu menus modern order ordering orders phrase refers restaurant restaurants service table take talking waiter waiters 166544

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (10/9/2000)

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735

animals auto automobile automobiles autos back caption car cars characters chauffeur childrens drive drives driving fable fables fictional general hare limo limousine limousines literature rides seat stories story tortoise vehicle vehicles waves 166545

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Top this, smart guy!

David Sipress (10/9/2000)

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736

acrobats another atop balancing campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates civil debate debates election elections general government governments hand incompetents official one platform podium political politician politicians politics presidential skateboards speeches talking 166546

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

He passed away last week. Can I give him a message?

Peter C. Vey (10/9/2000)

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737

assistant assistants ball balls boss bosses business businessman businessmen conference conferences corporate crystal dead death desk die executive executives fortune man meeting meetings message office offices professional professionals pseudo-science receptionist receptionists secretaries secretary talking tellers work working works 166547

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hey, who wants to hear a great single-malt story?

Jack Ziegler (10/9/2000)

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738

alcohol alcoholic alcoholics bar bars bourbon cocktail cocktails drink drinking drinks drunk drunks general inebriated intoxicated liquor man others pub scotch single-malt stories story talking tavern taverns whiskey 166548

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mister Jackson! You know how I feel about sampling.

Pat Byrnes (10/9/2000)

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739

another cheat cheating cheats class classes classroom classrooms composition computers course courses educated educating education instructor instructors language life modern music musical musicians phrase play polls pupil pupils quiz quizzes recorded sampling school schools software sound student students talking teach teacher teachers teaches teaching technology term test tests trends using word 166549

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Youre not standing in the designated protest area.

Frank Cotham (10/9/2000)

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740

attacked boss bosss bosses business career careers chained chains complaints desk dog dogs employee employees employer employers executives fire firing front general guard job jobs management nearly occupation occupations office problems profession professions protest work worker workers working works 166550

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Well, I guess this is goodbye!

Gahan Wilson (10/9/2000)

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741

apologetic days dead death die drown goodbye guess look naval ocean oceans officer olden pirates plank problems sea seas ships violence walk walking 166552

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What, may I ask, does landscape have to do with gender?

Edward Koren (10/9/2000)

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742

beautiful country environment feminine gender hike hikers landscape landscapes life look man masculine modern natural nature out over relationships woman 166553

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Damn! He took the car keys with him.

Michael Maslin (10/9/2000)

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743

auto automobile automobiles autos away cant car cars cemeteries clichs dead death drive drives driving funeral funerals general grave graves keys marriage problem problems relationships take vehicle vehicles walking widow 166554

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Tom Cheney (10/9/2000)

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744

ash ashtrays butt caption cigarette cigarettes cigars crawling desert deserts finds fitness general giant man problems rats rescue sand smoking thirst through 166555

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Daddy is fiscally buff.

Mike Twohy (10/9/2000)

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745

aerobic aerobics bodybuilder bodybuilders budget budgets buff child children dad dads dollar economics economy exercise exercises exercising families family father fathers finance finances fitness general gym gyms health income kid kids money muscle muscles muscular olympics parent parents people rich riches son sons sports television watching wealth wealthy weightlifters young youth 166556

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I have to hang up now. You just walked through the door.

William Haefeli (10/9/2000)

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746

beepers call calling calls cell cellphone cellphones cells cellular coming communicate communicates communication communications couple couples entering front home husband husbands language man marriage married mobile phone phones portable relationship relationships talking technology telephone telephones wife wives woman 166557

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This next one is a sad little blues tune about love and
pain that I wrote before I started taking Celexa.

David Sipress (10/9/2000)

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747

anti-depressant blues citalopram coffee consumerism depression drug drugs emotional entertainer entertainers entertainment entertains guitar house life medical medicine modern music musician musicians performer performers pharmacy problems prozac real singers strumming woman 166558

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

So what if he paid a classmate to do his homework


it was his own allowance.

Barbara Smaller (10/9/2000)

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748

allowance cheating children class classes classroom classrooms educated educating education elementary ethics fiance finances general hand holding homework instructor instructors mom moms money mother mothers parent parents pupil pupils school schools small son sons sons student students talking teach teacher teachers teaches teaching 166559

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What Id like is different Presidential candidates, but


I guess Ill just have the shrimp in garlic sauce.

Mort Gerberg (10/16/2000)

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749

bush campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates civil congress cuisine different dining eat eating election elections food garlic general george gore gov government governments like liked man meal meals menu menus official order ordering orders platform political politicians politics pres president presidents restaurant restaurants sauce senate service shrimp speaking vice voters waiter waiters 166560

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Your Honor, I ask youis this the toupee of


a successful adulterer?

J.C. Duffy (10/16/2000)

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750

adultery affairs age attorney attorneys bald balding cheap client clients court courtroom courtrooms courts defendant defendants duffy hair judge judges law lawyer lawyers love men middle relationships scenes sex stand style successful toupees trial trials triangles wearing wigs witness 166561

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hi, hon. Guess whos going to be on national television


apologizing to the American public.

Charles Barsotti (10/16/2000)

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751

apologies career entertainment ethics general government man media news occupation occupations over phone politics program programs show shows speaking telephones television televisions tv tvs washington wife work working 166563

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

John OBrien (10/16/2000)

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752

away -balloon balloons behind bills bits bucks buy buys caption captioned -daddy daughter discussion dont each events father fathers girl handful heart-shaped herding holding how leading man marked merchant merchants much o ok one other park prices revealed ripoff sale scene scenes selling shopping smirks street take ten thats the them then toy vend vender venders vending vendor vendors vends walks want well where whose writing 166564

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Our stock just went up ten points on the rumor that I was
replacing you all with burlap sacks stuffed with straw.

Peter C. Vey (10/16/2000)

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753

board boss bosses business businessman businessmen ceo chairman conference conferences dollar economics economy finance finances income invest investing investment investments invests market meeting meetings money office offices professional professionals rumor scarecrows speaking stock stockbrokers stocks work working works 166565

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ask yourself, Does it make me a better clown?

Danny Shanahan (10/16/2000)

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754

another appearance apperacnes better circus clown-nose cosmetic does ego entertainer entertainers entertainment entertains fitness huge make normal-sized nose noses performer performers plastic psychology sex speaking 166566

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Tarzan hate frivolous lawsuits.

Alex Gregory (10/16/2000)

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755

attorney attorneys away character characters civil client clients edge general jungle jungles keep lawsuits lawyer lawyers lbs maximum own posted referring risk signs sue suing swing warning warnings weight 166567

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ill call you back. Im harvesting rice.

Sam Gross (10/16/2000)

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756

agriculture bag beepers call calling calls cell cellphone cellphones cells cellular communicate communicates communication communications farm farmers farming food-gathering gleaners grain grains harvest mobile paddy peasants phone phones portable rice rural speaking technology telephone telephones woman 166568

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Three hundred dollars of regular.

David Sipress (10/16/2000)

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757

attendant automobiles autos car cars crisis dollars drive drives driving expensive fuel gas gasoline general inflation man money oil price prices service speaking sports station stations utility vehicle 166569

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Edward attracts light.

Gahan Wilson (10/16/2000)

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758

attracted attracts black coming flowers general hole husbands interiors lamps light potted science space 166570

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You know where we go to from here because


we already went there.

Victoria Roberts (10/16/2000)

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759

bench both boyfriend boyfriends companion couple couples date dates dating dont fights girlfriend girlfriends husban husband male marital marriage married park relationship relationships seated speaking where wife wives woman 166571

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (10/16/2000)

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760

attractive author authors behind book books bookstores campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates check election elections essay essays fiction literature meet novel novels out pile platform publication publications publishing reads relationships sex sign sits stories story table woman women writer writers writing 166572

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If pressured, I will run!

George Booth (10/16/2000)

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761

announcement bathtub bathtubs campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates cats election elections general government governments makes man people platform political politicians politics poor presidential 166573

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (10/16/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

762

accurate architecture around beautiful businessmen but cities city come commission commute commuter commuting conference consuming counterpart crappy cynically demolished discuss down expensive got guys how its landmark landmarks manhattan modern n.y. n.y.c. new ny nyc penn pennsylvania preservation rail railroad railroads rails reasons replace sit station stations stupid table taking three time title train trains transit transportation travel traveling travels trip trips ugly urban york 166574

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Weve got Tom OBrien on bass, Nick Weber on drums,


and Jonah Petchesky on contracts.

Alex Gregory (10/16/2000)

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763

attorney attorneys band beat beatniks business-suited contracts entertainment general generation hippies introduces law lawyers layers leader legal member money music musician musicians performer performers punks trend trends 166575

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And, if elected, I will take the money out of politics and put
it into a portfolio of high-yielding instruments.

Bernard Schoenbaum (10/16/2000)

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764

campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates civil commercial elect election elections government governments market media news official people platform political politician politicians politics presidential rich security social speaking speeches stock stockbrokers stocks television 166576

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Frank Cotham (10/16/2000)

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765

advertisements blower blowers bush campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates civil clears congress elect election elections fall flyers garbage george gore gov government governments lawns leaf liter man official platform political politicians politics president presidential presidents reading seasons senate signs trash vice-pres yard 166577

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

These are my conservative credentials.

Peter Steiner (10/16/2000)

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766

campaigns car cars conservative conservatives cops credentials drive driving license man more offers police politics stopped than them traffic 166578

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

First off, youre not a nut. Youre a legume.

Arnie Levin (10/16/2000)

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767

analyst couch crazy insanity legume lying medical nut patient patients peanut peanuts psychiatrist psychiatrists psychiatry psychologist psychologists psychology session speaking therapist therapists therapy 166579

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Michael Crawford (10/16/2000)

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768

art banner building capitol displays entertainment exhibit exhibition exhibitions exhibits gallery general government metropolitan museum museum-like museums politics possible signs washington 166580

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Thats right, Timmyonce upon a time Grandpa was


part of the target audience, just like you.

Lee Lorenz (10/16/2000)

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769

advertising age audience consumerism customer customers family general generation generations grandchild grandchildren granddaughter granddaughters grandfather grandfathers grandparent grandparents grandson grandsons knee marketing old shopping sitting speaking target television young youth 166581

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sorry, the line is busy again. He and Joe Lieberman


are still exchanging pleasantries.

J.B. Handelsman (10/16/2000)

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770

angel bedroom bedside campaign campaigns candidates election elections general god jewish jews joseph judaism little man phones platform pleasantries political politics prayer prayers praying prays president presidential religion scenes sen speaks telephones 166582

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You are absolutely rightWorld Series is


a misnomer. Now please shut up.

Edward Frascino (10/16/2000)

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771

answering athlete athletes baseball couple couples fights game games general language man marital names player players question relationship relationships right shut sport sports team teams tv watch womans 166583

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mike Twohy (10/16/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

772

bed beds businessmen career careers desk desks distorted filled furniture general like liquid mans occupation occupations office offices style trend water waterbeds work worker workers working works 166584

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Do you want me to explain to you just why youre


having feelings of inadequacy?

Leo Cullum (10/16/2000)

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773

age aging balding boss bosses business career careers ego employee employees employer employers executives feelings fire firing general inadequacy job jobs middle occupation occupations office people poor profession professions psychiatrists psychologists slight speaks work worker workers working works young 166585

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Look, the numbers dont lie.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (10/16/2000)

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774

after cliche cliches cops crime cups expression expressions general honesty interrogation lies like men numbers philosophies philosophy phrase phrases police sitting table their truth water 166586

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I knew C.P.R. wouldnt save our marriage,


but I had to try.

Michael Maslin (10/16/2000)

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775

astride cardio- couple couples cpr death divorce fighting fights floor general heart hearts husband husbands living man marital marriage married matrimony medical problem problems pulmonary relationship relationships resuscitation room sits try wife wives woman 166587

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

How do I feel? I feel that your question is trivial, courts


sensationalism, and is designed to appeal to appallingly
base instincts. Additionally, it demeans my intelligence.
Next question.
Edward Koren (10/16/2000)

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776

against answers country demean entertainment feel intelligence interview interviews leaning man media news program programs questions reporters sensationalism show shows television televisions trivial truck tv tvs 166588

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Shes expecting you.

Danny Shanahan (10/16/2000)

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777

argue argues arguing argument arguments behind box boxer boxers boxing coming corner couple couples d dates dating dining expect expecting fight fighting fights general into maitre man one prizefighter prizefighters problem problems relationships restaurant restaurants ring rings round rounds service sitting social speaks sports violence waiter waiters waits woman 166589

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

He said that he is socially liberal and fiscally conservative,


but what he meant is that he sleeps around and is cheap.

Barbara Smaller (10/16/2000)

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778

another boyfriend boyfriends cheap conservatives couple couples date dates dating ethics fiscally girlfriend girlfriends laundromats liberals men money relationship relationships sex socially speaking woman 166590

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its a very simple procedure. We slice off the top of your head,
scoop out your innards with a spoon, and carve out your
eyes and mouth.

Alex Gregory (10/30/2000)

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779

chair doctor doctors exam examination examinations exams fitness halloween health holidays hospitals jack-o-lanterns medical patient patients physician physicians pumpkin pumpkins sitting surgery talking 166591

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You have the right to remain silent, you are a child of the
universe, no less than the trees and the stars. You have
the right to be here. And, whether or not it is clear to
you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Michael Shaw (10/30/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

780

against age arrest car child crime crimes criminal criminals cuffs hood humanities language law man miranda new officer philosophies philosophy play police rights traffic universal word 166592

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Eric Lewis (10/30/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

781

all ask child children dad dads daughter daughters divorce divorced divorces divorcing domestic families family father fathers kid kids life man modern mom moms mother mothers nude parent parents people reads relationships son sons subtext tattoo tattoos trends woman young youth 166593

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ill have whatever theyre having.

Jack Ziegler (10/30/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

782

alcohol alcoholic alcoholics angel angels bar bars bartender bartenders cocktail cocktails devils dining drink drinking drinks drunk drunks general heaven hell inebriated intoxicated liquor next orders pub religion same sitting tavern taverns 166594

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I like Al Gore just fineif only he werent such a constant


reminder that, for me, vaudeville is dead.

Victoria Roberts (10/30/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

783

campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates civil days dead down elect election elections entertainment government governments man official olden platform political politicians politics poll polls president presidential presidents street talking vaudeville vice-pres vote voter voters votes voting walk woman 166595

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Dont these fools realize theyre violating every


principle of feng-shui?

Gahan Wilson (10/30/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

784

apartments architecture asian blueprints building china construction eastern feng-shui fool fools iron language looking play problems urban word workers workmen 166596

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its the porch plantscan they come in?

Lee Lorenz (10/30/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

785

autumn cold doorway fall flowers garden gardening gardens home homes house houseplant houseplants houses man nature outside plant plants porch porches potted season seasons standing talking weather winter 166597

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Not voting this year?

Tom Cheney (10/30/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

786

age another background campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates cave caveman cavemen civil congress dwellers elect election elections fight fighting fights general government governments official one others platform political politicians politics poll polls prehistoric president presidents problem problems senate stone violence vote voter voters votes voting 166598

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Well, if it doesnt matter whos right and whos wrong,


why dont I be right and you be wrong?

David Sipress (10/30/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

787

argue argues arguing argument arguments couch debate debates fighting fights husband husbands language living marital marriage play problem problems relationships right room she sits talking wife word wrong 166599

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Peter Steiner (10/30/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

788

briefcase business dignified executive executives fitness gravitas language play reads scale scales somber walks weighing weight word your 166600

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Danny Shanahan (10/30/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

789

baseball cities city commute commuter commuters commuting entrance fare fee games general leisure manhattan mets money n.y. n.y.c. new ny nyc outside price reading regional scalper series sign sports stands subway suckers tickets tokens transit transportation urban world yankees york 166601

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Selective breeding has given me an aptitude for the law, but


I still love fetching a dead duck out of freezing water.

Leo Cullum (10/30/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

790

animals bar bars birds breed business-suited dog dogs ducks general hunt hunters hunting lawyers leisure man martini nature over pedigree pets sports talking talks 166602

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I have the six figures, the stock options, and the limo, but
where are the letters from grateful schoolchildren?

Barbara Smaller (10/30/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

791

assistant assistants behind business businessman businessmen children corporate desk executive executives grateful large letters money office offices people professional professionals rich salaries school schools secretaries secretary sitting six talking teachers thank work working works 166603

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Michael Crawford (10/30/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

792

accidents air big captionless casting doorstep fall falls flies giant home journalism man media meteors new news newspaper newspapers outside pajamas paper papers periodical periodicals problems publication publishing shadow sky standing suburbs through times york 166604

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We met cute, but we didnt continue cute.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (10/30/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

793

affairs another boyfriend boyfriends continue couple couples cute date dates dating discussing down girlfriend girlfriends language love men one play relationship relationships scenes street talking walking woman women word 166605

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Absolutely. When Im elected, all youll have


to do is whistle.

Charles Barsotti (10/30/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

794

bag business campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates civil congress dog dogs elect election elections ethics executive general government governments holding life modern money official platform political politician politicians politics president presidents senate speech talking whistle 166606

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

O.K. What part of malignant regression and pathogenic


reintrojection as a defense against psychic decompensation
dont you understand?

Robert Mankoff (10/30/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

795

analyst confused decompensation malignant pathogenic patient patients pretentious psychiatrist psychiatrists psychiatry psychobabble psychologist psychologists psychology session talking therapist therapists therapy understand 166607

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And do you, Barry, take this woman, warts and


all, to be your wife?

Michael Maslin (10/30/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

796

beauty ceremonies ceremony couple couples halloween holidays husband husbands man marriage married marries matrimony monster problems pseudo relationship relationships science vow vows warts weddings wife witch witches wives 166608

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (10/30/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

797

all another asked blowout car chast clustered collide cop cops crime criminal criminals did dispute domestic donuts dunkin eastern elm explodes famous fights form friday front full funny general group haiku hear hears heights here huge idiot in incidents injured inside ka-boom keys know lady law leave local locks log lot mailbox mansion marital media monday neighbors newspaper newspapers noise one parents parking poem poems poet poetic poetry poets police policeman policemen provence prowler raccoon reported roz saturday shop some stop street suburbia suburbs sunday teen teen-agers text thursday tuesday two ugly volvos was wednesday week what window worried youths 166609

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Robert Mankoff (11/6/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

798

animal animals birds chicken chickens crest dining dna engineered engineering fish general genes genetic genetically head kfc life modern monsters ocean problems restaurants rooster science sea seas technology too water way 166610

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This year, Hal, weve decided to concentrate on a few


close races, where the undead vote could be decisive.

Lee Lorenz (11/6/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

799

belner campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates chats civil decisive elect election elections entertainment general government governments host interviews late monsters night occult official platform political politicians politics show talk television tv undead vampire vampires 166611

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Dont make me come over there!

J.C. Duffy (11/6/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

800

analyst anger angry couch doctors duffy fight fighting fights general laying mad patient patients problem problems psychiatrist psychiatrists psychiatry psychologist psychologists psychology session talking therapist therapists therapy threat threaten threats violence 166612

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Now, this baby can hold up to five hundred magnets.

William Haefeli (11/6/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

801

appliance consumerism couple customer general home homes kitchen looking magnets refrigerator refrigerators salesman salesmen shopping 166613

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im on sabbatical from a marriage in Lewiston, Maine.

William Hamilton (11/6/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

802

adultery affairs bar cocktail colleges couple couples dating flirt flirtations flirting flirts general husband husbands love man marriage married matrimony parties pickups relationship relationships sabbatical scenes state states talking wife wives woman 166614

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

For some reason, Im getting nicer. Where will it end?

Victoria Roberts (11/6/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

803

age aging couple couples down husband husbands language man marriage married matrimony middle middle-age middle-aged nice nicer psychology reason relationship relationships street talking walk wife wives woman 166615

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh, stop your frettin.

Frank Cotham (11/6/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

804

business chart charts corporate cowboy cowboys declining executives frettin fretting graph graphs hats language management meetings problems profits showing slang statistic statistics talk worried worry 166616

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

EwwwCabernet with tuna fish?

Danny Shanahan (11/6/2000)

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805

beside boy child children cuisine dining drinking eat eating elementary fish food general girl gourmet kid kids low lunch restaurants sandwich sandwiches school talking teachers tuna wine young youth 166617

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I make decisions as much with my gut as I do


with my brain. Lets eat.

Peter Steiner (11/6/2000)

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806

another boss bosses business businessman businessmen city corporate decisions dining down eat eating executives food general meal meals meeting meetings office offices one professional professionals street walking work working works 166618

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ive had to be both mother and father to them.

David Sipress (11/6/2000)

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807

beard beards both child children couple dad dads daughter daughters dress families family father fathers general kid kids life modern mom moms mother mothers parent parents park relationships son sons talking transvestites two young youth 166619

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im sure you two will discover that youre both plagued


by a lot of the same nonexistent problems.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (11/6/2000)

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808

anxiety cocktail guest guests introduces introductions men mingle mingling nervous nonexistent parties party problems psychology social socialize socializing woman 166620

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

My dads a recovering role model, too.

Michael Crawford (11/6/2000)

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809

alcoholics another boy child children dad dads families family father fathers general kid kids lazy model mom moms mother mothers one parent parents problems recovering relationships role sleep sleeping son sons television young youth 166621

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Apparently, its his severance package.

Peter C. Vey (11/6/2000)

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810

beggars boss bosses box business businessmen can career careers cup donation door employee employees employer employers employment executives fire fired firing general give hire hires hiring interview interviewing interviews investments job jobs management occupation occupations office package past personnel please poor profession professions reading resume resumes salaries severance signs stroll tin two unemployed unemployment what work worker workers working works 166622

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ill start with the knight in shining armor, then


have the maiden rare and radiant.

Charles Barsotti (11/6/2000)

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811

alligators days diner dining dragon dragons food general knights maiden meal meals medieval menus monsters olden order ordering orders restaurant restaurants service taking talking times waiter waiters 166623

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im still undecidedI like Lenos foreign policy, but


Letterman makes a lot of sense on domestic issues.

Dana Fradon (11/6/2000)

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812

another bar bars businessmen campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates celebrities david domestic elect election elections entertainment foreign general incompetents issues jay leno man media one platform policy politics presidential program programs show shows speech talking television televisions tv tvs undecided washington 166624

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ill be in, honey, as soon as I rake the leaf.

Liza Donnelly (11/6/2000)

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813

apartments autumn balconies balcony chore chores cities city fall household landscape lawn lawns leaf leaves man rake seasons terrace urban work yard 166625

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

John OBrien (11/6/2000)

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814

another as babies buy buying can consume consumer consumerism consumers crime crimes criminal criminals customer customers department ethics general one pregnancy problems retail rob robber robbers robbery sale sales says second see seemingly-pregnant shop shoplifter shoplifters shoplifting shopper shoppers shopping shops steal still store stores theft trimester 166626

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sidney Harris (11/13/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

815

another call calling calls cart00issue cell cellphone cellphones cells communicate communicates communication communications commuters getting im life mobile modern off one person phone phones saying says technology telephone telephones train travel yet 166656

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its a whole different world over here, isnt it?

Jack Ziegler (11/13/2000)

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816

angel beret cart00issue cities city coffee couple culture cultures drinking europe foreign france french gangs hells international isn't life modern motorcycle neighborhood neighborhoods newspaper paris pass reading regional travel urban vacation 166657

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I won it for being lice-free.

Barbara Smaller (11/13/2000)

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817

boy cart00issue children education elementary fitness insect insects medical mother pest pests picks prize school she shows young 166655

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I was distracted for a moment. Go on.

Peter Mueller (11/13/2000)

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818

accident accidents auto automobile automobiles autos call calling calls car cars cart00issue cell cellphone cellphones cells communicate communicates communication communications crash crashes disheveled drive drives hand man mobile phone phones safety steering talking technology telephone telephones vehicle vehicles walking wheel wreck wreckage wrecks 166644

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ignore them. Theyre cartoonists.

Tom Kleh (11/13/2000)

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819

another art boat boats cart00issue cartoon desert draw drawing drawings ironic irony island man ocean oceans one pads people problems rescue rowboat sea seas sketch stranded talking three 166643

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This is getting us nowhere!

Gahan Wilson (11/13/2000)

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820

analyst animals cart00issue come couch insecurity out patient patients problems psychiatrist psychiatrists psychiatry psychologist psychologists psychology session shell talking therapist therapists therapy turtle wont 166648

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

David Sipress (11/13/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

821

cart00issue editorial emotion emotions feelings journalism language life man media modern news newspaper newspapers paper papers periodical periodicals publication publishing reading section sitting table titled 166649

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its a dog tradition. Every morning and evening,


we thank God that were not cats.

J.B. Handelsman (11/13/2000)

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822

animal animals behavior behaviors cart00issue cat cats dog dogs pet pets pray prayer religion street talking 166652

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Eldon Dedini (11/13/2000)

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823

arm bug busker cart00issue city cup entertainment eyes haunting life melodies modern musician musicians performer performers reads request sign song songs street tin under urban violin 166647

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

To you it was fast.

Eric Lewis (11/13/2000)

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824

albert angry bed boyfriend boyfriends cart00issue cigarette couple couples einstein fitness girlfriend girlfriends problems relationship relationships relativity science sex sexual smoking talking woman 166645

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I dont want to treat you like dirt, but I dont


want to lose you, either.

Pat Byrnes (11/13/2000)

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825

argue argues arguing argument arguments boyfriend boyfriends cart00issue chair couple couples depression down fighting fights girlfriend girlfriends head language looking man out problem problems relationship relationships sitting talking window woman 16665 0

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If nothing else, school has prepared me for


a lifetime of backpacking.

William Haefeli (11/13/2000)

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826

adolescent another cart00issue children class classes classroom classrooms educated educating education instructor instructors leisure one problems pupil pupils school schools student students style teach teacher teachers teaches teaching teen teenager teenagers teens trend trends young youth 166653

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (1 of 15)

Bond. James Bond.


Hell. Go to hell.

J.C. Duffy (11/13/2000)

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827

attraction bar bars celebrities celebrity dating duffy entertainment flirt flirting flirts funnies00issue line mans movies pick-up relationship relationships response single womans 166627

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (2 of 15)

This is your captain speaking.

Mick Stevens (11/13/2000)

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828

airplane airplanes flight fly flying funnies00issue history jetliner passengers piloting pirate plane planes travel vacations 166628

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (3 of 15)

My mom says that in twenty years well look back on our


mode of dress and be amused by these clearly excellent
choices. I think not.

Jack Ziegler (11/13/2000)

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829

adolescent another baggy both children family fashion funnies00issue one shirts shorts style styles teen teenager teenagers teens trend trends wearing youth 166629

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (4 of 15)

Im going to get you acquitted, but I want


my fee to be a lesson to you.

Leo Cullum (11/13/2000)

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830

attorney attorneys client clients crime defendant defendants ethics funnies00issue lawyer lawyers legal money speaking trial trials 166630

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (5 of 15)

No thanks, Im fine.

Tom Cheney (11/13/2000)

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831

cafe cafes carrying coffee cup dining entire funnies00issue giant man mans mug mugs pot restaurant service speaking table waiter waiters 166631

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (6 of 15)

Peter C. Vey (11/13/2000)

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832

beg beggars begging begs bum bums cup dollar finance finances funnies00issue its money not reads sidewalk sign tin tramp tramps 166632

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (7 of 15)

What the hell did you expect?

Danny Shanahan (11/13/2000)

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833

after animal around ax axe body chicken chops cut death dining farm farmer food funnies00issue head holidays its off poultry reproaches runs rural thanksgiving turkey turkeys while yard 166633

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (8 of 15)

Im warning youIm going to call the police if


you dont stop touching base with me.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (11/13/2000)

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834

angry boyfriend boyfriends call calling calls communicate communicates communication communications couple couples date dates dating funnies00issue girlfriend girlfriends into phone phones problem problems relationship relationships speaking stalk stalker stalking telephone telephones woman 166634

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (9 of 15)

Run this up Legals ass.

Frank Cotham (11/13/2000)

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835

boss business businessman businessmen corporate employee ethics funnies00issue handing law legal office offices paperwork profane professional professionals some work working works 166635

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (10 of 15)

If anyone cares, Ill be E-mailing Amnesty International.

Lee Lorenz (11/13/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

836

angry bedroom charity child children close covered dad dads door emailing families family father fathers funnies00issue gap generation government kid kids mom moms mother mothers parent parents politics ready son sons torture warnings which young youth 166636

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (11 of 15)

What day of the week did we decide it was?

George Booth (11/13/2000)

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837

age aging apartment calendar forget forgetful funnies00issue man marriage memory old relationships talking their time weeks wife 166637

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (12 of 15)

Only two things are certaindeath and food.

Sam Gross (11/13/2000)

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838

animals another birds cliche cliches expression expressions funnies00issue nature one phrase phrases talking taxes there vulture 166638

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (13 of 15)

O.K., I just found my wife in bed with my best friend


and I go into a rage. Whats my motivation?

Peter Steiner (11/13/2000)

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839

act acting actor actors actress actresses acts adultery argue argues arguing argument arguments couple couples direction directions director directors entertainment fighting fights funnies00issue husband husbands incompetents marriage married matrimony okay problem problems relationship relationships speaking stage theatre wife wives 166639

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (14 of 15)

And so, for the sake of the children, they lived


together forever after.

William Hamilton (11/13/2000)

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840

child children couple couples dad dads divorce dolls families family father fathers funnies00issue games husband husbands kid kids making marriage married matrimony mom moms mother mothers parent parents play playing relationship relationships son sons story wife wives young youth 166640

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (15 of 15)

Robert Weber (11/13/2000)

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841

behind boss bosses business career careers door employee employees employer employers funnies00issue huge in job jobs leaving man marked occupation occupations office out papers pile profession professions through walks work worker workers working works 166641

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

O.K. Fair enough. Thats a great price


for mayonnaise.

Alex Gregory (11/13/2000)

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842

beside big bottle cart00issue condiment condiments consumerism food giant holding jar large man mayo money receipt relationships shopping standing talking woman 166651

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If Id known he was going to win, I never


would have voted for him.

Bernard Schoenbaum (11/13/2000)

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843

against another campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates cart00issue civil elect election elections fence government governments leaning man official one platform political politicians politics president presidents talking vote voter voters votes voting 166654

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We, the jury, find our lattes too cinnamony.

Michael Maslin (11/13/2000)

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844

cart00issue coffee court courtroom courtrooms courts cups dining food holding judge judges juries juror jurors jury law spices talking trend trends trial trials 166646

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

When I heard that Charlies Angels raked in over forty


million in its first weekend, I sensed that there was great
confusion in this country.

Jack Ziegler (11/20/2000)

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845

america americans angels another audience audiences businessman charlies cinema cinemas confusion critic criticism critics critique crowd crowds current down election elections entertainment film films general language life may media modern movie movies one play politics presidential problems refer street talking united walking won word 166658

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

He didnt have to get snippy about it!

Frank Cotham (11/20/2000)

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846

anger brawl bush comment concession days duel dueling duelist duels fight fighting fights fisticuffs george gore gov ground gun guns honor language lying made olden opponent pistol pistols play refers regarding retracted revolver revolvers snippy talking violence word wounded 166659

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The guy that knows about the books isnt here today.
Id be more than happy to suggest a bookmark.

Michael Maslin (11/20/2000)

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847

author authors book bookmarks books bookstore bookstores clerk consumerism customer essay essays fiction incompetents know knowing knows literature novel novels publication publications publishing retail shopping stories story suggest talking writer writers writing 166660

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Eventually, Howard wants to dump himself in the


Atlantic and serve as an artificial reef for fish.

Peter C. Vey (11/20/2000)

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848

another artificial business businessman businessmen conservation ecology environment executives general looking nature ocean oceans office one out reef sea seas talking third water window 166661

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Yes, I realize that we are free agents, but I have to take on


the additional risk of pregnancy and am more susceptible to
certain sexually transmitted diseases, so I think you should
pay for the movie.
Barbara Smaller (11/20/2000)

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849

agents boyfriend boyfriends couple couples date dates dating feminism free general girlfriend girlfriends language movies outside pay pregnancy problems relationship relationships risk sex social talking theater woman 166662

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The kick is up, and its, its, its too close to call!

Robert Mankoff (11/20/2000)

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850

after announcer announcers athlete athletes began between bush campaigns cant candidates decide elections football game games general george good gore gov kick language life man modern not play player players political presidential race recounts refers sport sports still team teams television undecided vice-pres watching week word 166663

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Again? I read you your Miranda rights last night.

Robert Weber (11/20/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

851

bed child children cops crime dad dads daughter daughters families family father fathers general kid kids law literature night parent parents police policeman policemen reading relationships rest sleep uniform young youth 166664

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

No, I dont want to change you, Darryl. But sure, it


would be great if you were completely different.

J.C. Duffy (11/20/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

852

boyfriend boyfriends change coffee couple couples date dates dating different duffy fights girlfriend girlfriends man marital problems relationship relationships restaurant restaurants social speaking stalemate table woman 166665

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We slipped in the tub.

Frank Cotham (11/20/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

853

accident accidents age aging another arms bathrooms cast casts cocktail couple guest incompetents interiors paris parties party plaster relationships sex slip slipped talking tubs 166666

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Michael Crawford (11/20/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

854

arms cheese cheeses dining domestic eat eating elusive food gourmet hides legs pecorino refrigerator refrigerators sunglasses wedge 166667

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Nice job, Reverend, but I think Ill stick


to worshipping my body.

Lee Lorenz (11/20/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

855

after bible biblical bodybuilders catholic catholicism christ christian christianity church churches clergy clergyman fitness general god language man mass muscular play priest priests religion religious suit talking word 166668

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You were kept after school to review multiplication


and division. This is not a date.

Edward Frascino (11/20/2000)

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856

boyfriend boyfriends child children class classes classroom classrooms couple couples date dates dating educated educating education elementary girlfriend girlfriends instructor instructors kid kids mathematics problems pupil pupils relationship relationships review school schools social student students talking teach teacher teachers teaches teaching young youth 166669

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Have you ever thought about becoming a duck?

Matthew Diffee (11/20/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

857

animals answered birds cults door ducks home homes house houses jehovah life man modern religion talking think thinking thought two witness 166671

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Now that our last is off to college, could you tell me


who the hell you are?

Liza Donnelly (11/20/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

858

children couple couples education family fights general husband husbands kitchen know man marital marriage married matrimony problems relationship relationships talking wife wives woman 166672

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Too Jewish?

David Sipress (11/20/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

859

clothes clothing consumerism fashion hassidic hat hats judaism man men mens problems regional religion shopping store style styles suit suits tailor tailors talking trend trends trying woman 166675

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I bark, I get fed. That works for me.

Donald Reilly (11/20/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

860

animal animals another background bark cuisine dining dog dogs eat eating fed food general leaves low man master masters one pet pets rakes relationships service talking while work works 166673

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (11/20/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

861

arrives attack bear chast communication connecticut correspondence desert etc eventually government horseback incompetents incredible journey letter letters mail mailmen mountains new ocean office peasant pigeon post problems reach region regional regions roz sandstorms scorpions the through took transport transportation travel travels trip trips two via weeks why york 166674

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Today in school we learned how to recount to ten.

Mort Gerberg (11/27/2000)

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862

bush child class classes classroom classrooms count dinner educated educating education election elections elementary family florida george gore gov incompetents instructor instructors life long modern ongoing parents presidential problems pupil pupils recount refers school schools small student students table talking teach teacher teachers teaches teaching vice-pres votes 166676

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Good Lord! Its another vote for Al Gore!

Lee Lorenz (11/27/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

863

campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates chines chinese civil cookie cookies cuisine dining election elections favoring florida fortune government governments hand-recount long low man now official ongoing platform political politicians politics president presidential presidents reading refers restaurant restaurants vice-pres vote voter voters votes voting which woman 166677

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You have to admit that your chip looks


a lot like their chip.

Sidney Harris (11/27/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

864

admit associate attorneys business chips collar comparing computers crime ethics general hardware life look-alikes man micro modern office patent problems technology white 166678

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Please turn off any electronic devices and refrain from


using your cell phone as we pass through the darkness
and into the light.

Michael Maslin (11/27/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

865

airplanes call calling calls cell cellphone cellphones cells cellular communicate communicates communication communications darkness dead death die dying general grim holding language light man mobile phone phones play reaper talking telephone telephones warning warnings word 166679

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Whose idea was this damn middle class?

William Hamilton (11/27/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

866

aristocracy balcony bourgeois class court days idea ideas king medieval middle money olden peasants poor problems rich royal royalty status street talking 166680

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Donald Reilly (11/27/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

867

argue argues arguing argument arguments boxing captionless couple couples dining fighting fights fitness herself husband husbands ill images learn lesson lessons man marital marriage married matrimony mental one pop prizefighters problem problems relationship relationships restaurant sports take think thinks wife wives woman 166681

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Then I wake up, the cheering has stopped, I have


three kids, and I work in a cubicle.

Charles Barsotti (11/27/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

868

analyst athlete athletes boss bosses business career careers couch cubicle depression employee employees employer employers family football general insecurity job jobs lying occupation occupations office patient patients player problems profession professions psychiatrist psychiatrists psychiatry psychologist psychologists psychology session sports talking therapist therapists therapy unemployment work worker workers working works 166682

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The nurses and technicians did all they


couldI just wasnt into it.

Peter C. Vey (11/27/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

869

accident accidents after death doctor doctors emergencies emergency fitness health hospital hospitals incompetents into medical operation operations patient patients physician physicians rooms surgeon surgeons surgery talking unsuccessful waiting woman 166683

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

See, thats your problem right therethe roof


is mostly sugar.

Alex Gregory (11/27/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

870

against candied characters childrens contractor fairy fictional general gingerbread gretel handsel house leaning literature problems repair repairs roofs stories story sugar tales talking witch workmen 166684

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Theyre not worth the uranium it would take


to blow them to hell.

Frank Cotham (11/27/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

871

anger army atom bomb bombs business general generals life maps meeting military modern officers other prices problems strategy talking uranium violence war worth 166685

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The Taklaks have a huge fire.

Danny Shanahan (11/27/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

872

age campfire cave caveman cavemen cavewoman cooking couple couples domestic dwellers fire fixing household huge husband husbands interiors money over relationship relationships small spear stone talking wife wives 166686

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I know Im perjuring myself, but Im trying to make a point!

Mike Twohy (11/27/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

873

attorney attorneys client clients court courtroom courtrooms courts crime defendant defendants dishonesty ethics judge judges juries juror jurors jury language law lawyer lawyers perjury play point problems stand talking trial trials witness witnesses word 166687

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Do you realize weve been together through


three versions of Windows?

Barbara Smaller (11/27/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

874

computer computers corporation couple couples domestic husband husbands interiors man marriage married matrimony microsoft office relationship relationships seating software talking technology together wife wives woman 166688

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Well, Henriwhats robust today?

Lee Lorenz (11/27/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

875

businessmen cuisine dining eat eating food general language meal meals menu menus order ordering orders play restaurant restaurants robust seated service table talking two waiter waiters word 166689

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sometimes I get so bored with myself I can


barely make it to doodle-do.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (11/27/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

876

animals another bird bored boredom boring career careers cock-a-doodle-do complains doodle-do farm job jobs occupation occupations problems rooster roosters talking work worker workers working works 166690

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And another thing. I dont want you


visiting my Web site.

Mick Stevens (11/27/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

877

bags boyfriend boyfriends computers couple couples divorce fights girlfriend girlfriends good home husband internet leave leaving life marital modern packed problems relationship relationships she talking technology website wives woman 166691

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If she wasnt such a bitch, she wouldnt have


anything going for her.

Marisa Acocella (11/27/2000)

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878

another bitch conversation conversations discussion discussions executive executives female go going gossip gossiping gossips language one problems relationships talk talking viewpoint womens 166692

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

J.C. Duffy (11/27/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

879

an beggars bum captionless computer computers cup duffy error general holds jargon language occurred play reads sign signs technology three tin type unexpectedly urban word 166693

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Id love to join you in saying horrible things about


men, but I used to be one myself.

William Haefeli (11/27/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

880

discussing gender genders gossip gossiping gossips horrible life men modern office others problems relationships sex talking things transexual watercooler woman women 166694

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Alex Gregory (11/27/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

881

arms asleep bed bedroom beer behind breakfast commhnication communicatorbot couch couple couples crossed domestic ever fights folded general hand hides husband husbands man marital media men newspaper newspapers next one problems relationship relationships replace robots rolled scenes sex sexbot side sits sitting stands table technology while wife will wives woman work workbot 166695

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its going to be my first protest song, as soon as I can


figure out some words that rhyme with Napster,
Bertelsmann, and service charge.

Jack Ziegler (12/4/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

882

acquisitions beat beatniks bertelsmann campus college computers dorm education generation guitar hippies internet lyrics mergers music napster playing protest punks rock-and-roll roomate service songs student students talking 166697

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Robert Mankoff (12/4/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

883

africa away ballot ballots candidates chad country dispute foreign international life lifted map modern partly politics presidential regional were 166698

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (12/4/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

884

auto automobile automobiles autos car cars child children dad dads daughter daughters drive drives driving families family father fathers general kid kids like mom moms mother mothers parent parents reads roof sign soccer son sons taxi taxis urban vehicle vehicles woman young youth 166699

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Every few years, Gordon and the TV get


a couple of inches wider.

Barbara Smaller (12/4/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

885

age aging another big chair fat fitness general husband husbands inches large life media middle middle-age middle-aged modern old one people problems relationships sitting talking technology television watching weight woman 166700

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Robert Mankoff (12/4/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

886

box business captionless career careers desk executives hobbies in incompetents job jobs mail makes man occupation occupations out papers puts them work worker workers working works 166701

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Why cant you just learn to floss like other men?

Michael Crawford (12/4/2000)

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887

bra couple couples dentists discussing embracing floss grabs man men relationship relationships sex strap teeth woman women 166702

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

He turns out not to be Italianjust Italianate.

William Hamilton (12/4/2000)

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888

animal animals another breed breeds discussing equestrian foreign foreigners general horse horseback horses italian italiante italy jockey jockeys language men one play problems regional relationships ride riders riding saddle saddles woman women word 166703

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Let me get this, but keep in mind that youll pay for
it in other, more subtle ways later on.

Peter C. Vey (12/4/2000)

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889

business check cuisine dining eat eating food general giving language meal meals men menu menus money one order ordering orders pay relationships restaurant restaurants service subtle table two waiter waiters 166704

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I always lived vicariously. Why cant


I die vicariously?

Peter Steiner (12/4/2000)

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890

age bed death deathbed die dying generation generations language man relatives talking vicariously 166705

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And to think he started in accounting.

Robert Weber (12/4/2000)

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891

accounting arms boss bosses business career careers castle castles crowd employee employees employer employers estate job jobs king leader looking man men occupation occupations office outstretched profession professions real royalty start started tower two work worker workers working works 166706

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its non-negotiable.

Charles Barsotti (12/4/2000)

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892

animals another attorney attorneys bone bones client clients defendant defendants dog dogs general lawyer lawyers non-negotiable problem protecting puppies puppy talking third 166707

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Use a hockey stickmake it look like a game.

Frank Cotham (12/4/2000)

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893

accident accidents around crime crimes criminal criminals death game gangs gangster gangsters hockey kill killer killers killing life mafia mobsters modern murder murderer murderers murders organized room sitting smokey table violence 166708

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If youll have me, Id like to be your blind spot.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (12/4/2000)

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894

blind boyfriend boyfriends couple couples date dates dating general girlfriend girlfriends language love man play proposals proposing relationship relationships scenes woman word 166709

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (12/4/2000)

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895

before blockbuster blockbusters calm captionless christmas cinema cinemas deluge film films general god greed holiday holidays hollywood marquee marquees mega money movie movies oh please reads scenes season seasons signs street theater theaters theatre theatres xmas 166710

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Christopher Weyant (12/4/2000)

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896

airplane airplanes banner banners boss bosses business captionless career careers control desk employee employees employer employers employment fire fired firing general interrupted job jobs management occupation occupations office outside plane planes profession professions radio remote says skyline skywriting toys unemployed unemployment urban window work worker workers working works youre 166711

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Lee Lorenz (12/4/2000)

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897

alarm also bed bedroom brokers budget budgets captionless clock clocks displays dollar dollars economics economy finance finances income index looking lying man market money net people rich riches scenes stock stocks time wealth wealthy worth 166712

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This is so unexpectedI didnt even prepare a speech.

Alex Gregory (12/4/2000)

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898

auto automobile automobiles autos award awards car cars convertible cop crime drive drives driving ego freeway freeways handing highway highways hollywood language motorcycle oscars play police speech speeches ticket traffic vehicle vehicles violations woman word 166713

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hi! Im Todd, your waiter, and Id like to think our


friendship is more than contextual.

William Haefeli (12/4/2000)

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899

contextual cuisine diners dining eat eating food himself introduces introductions meal meals menu menus order ordering orders relationship relationships restaurant restaurants service waiter waiters 166714

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Youve changed, Howie.

Gahan Wilson (12/4/2000)

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900

armchair change couple couples death fighting fights general husband husbands marital marriage married matrimony problem problems relationship relationships sitting skeleton wife wives you've 166715

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (12/4/2000)

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901

ado alaskas all amusement appreciative ardent bad blenders brain buy campaign campaigning campaigns can candidate candidates cards chast civil congress debate defenders desert did doubt election elections eternally ever everyone fella few first-rate general go gore government governments gratitude green guess gun happy have high-school hope how indebted isnt jerk lot make mall man mark mr much nader nice note now official once one only pal park- paved platform poem poems poetry political politicians politics president presidential presidents problem ralph rating really repay roz run sarcastic say senate shopping stuck thank thank-you thanks there theres think this too twit was washington wasnt way werent what when why will without won work would yosemites you youd youre 166716

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Are we interested in a meticulously detailed, genuine


silver coin, issued and authenticated by the Franklin
Mint, honoring whichever schmuck wins?

Robert Mankoff (12/11/2000)

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902

awards bush campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates civil coin coins congress consumerism election elections general george gore gov government governments hand holding honor honoring husband incompetents official over platform political politicians politics president presidents receiver schmuck senate suckers talking telephone telephones vice-pres woman 166717

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (12/11/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

903

anyway arrowed ballot ballots breezy bush campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates childs circled civil completely confusing congress conventional dated described design down drawing election elections enough first five fourth george go gore gov government governments grocery guidelines handwritten invalid jumble labels last life like list listed looks marked modern more most nader naders name note official out paper platform political politicians politics poll polls president presidents problems puzzle ralph
scratched scrawl second senate september sheila shown slightly slip stick-figure suggesting than the third two unscrambled valid vice-pres vote voter voters votes voting what will words writer 166718

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Things were done very differently on the farm when


I was your age, Kenny.

Michael Maslin (12/11/2000)

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904

animals barn boss bosses business career careers children computers cows different employee employees employer employers farming farms father general generation generations job jobs life modern occupation occupations office profession professions progress rural sit son talking technology where work worker workers working works 166719

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Now youre getting the hang of it!

Gahan Wilson (12/11/2000)

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905

child children cringe dad dads days families family father fathers fear general hierarchy kid kids king management olden parent parents peasants problems royalty son sons talking young youth 166720

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Life isnt fair, Milford, and thats what makes it fun.

Charles Barsotti (12/11/2000)

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906

boss bosses business career careers desk employee employees employer employers employment executives fair fire fired firing fun job jobs john kennedy large management occupation occupations office pres profession professions sitting talking unemployed unemployment work worker workers working works 166721

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Theyre bred for their facial characteristics.

Peter Mueller (12/11/2000)

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907

animal animals another appearance appearances bred breeding discussing dog dogs faces general human-faced master masters men monsters one pedigree pets science she talking technology walking woman women 166722

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Even my childhood dreams were of tax cuts.

Eldon Dedini (12/11/2000)

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908

age another arm budget budgets chairs childhood clubs cuts dollar economics economy eldery finance finances greed income man mens money one people psychology republican republicans rich riches sitting tax taxes wealth wealthy 166723

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You can always put it in your closet and leave it there.

Peter C. Vey (12/11/2000)

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909

buy buying clerk closets clothing consume consumer consumerism consumers contemplating customer customers department dress fashion general leave problems retail sale sales saleswoman saleswomen shop shopper shoppers shopping shops store stores talking womens 166724

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Rufus, here, is the center of our life!

Edward Koren (12/11/2000)

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910

animal animals between center couch dog dogs general giant its life master masters owners pet pets relationships sits size 166725

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If I knew the meaning of life, would I be


sitting in a cave in my underpants?

Peter Steiner (12/11/2000)

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911

climb climber eastern guru gurus hermit hermits hike hiker incompetents inspiration ledge life meaning modern mountain mountian philosophies philosophy problems religions underpants 166726

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (12/11/2000)

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912

after also celebrities child children edison electricity father general inventors prank running science shock small static thomas trick yelling young youth zzzzt 166727

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

For Petes sake, Lucille, lighten


upits only a sleepover.

Lee Lorenz (12/11/2000)

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913

adultery affair affairs blonde buxom couple couples daddies domestic door fights front husband husbands love marital marriage married matrimony problems relationship relationships scenes sex sexual sleepover sugar talking triangles wife wives 166728

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (12/11/2000)

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914

anxiety asked attack attacks bound brad brassiere-related brassieres cemeteries cemetery dad date dead death die died due dying embarrassment experience fat fathers front ground had helicopter jane lucy merely mom mothers never opened outward overweight people person pregnancy queried question recovered rescued spot stories swallowed tell three tombstones 166729

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Your father loves me very much, in his own way, and


I love your father very much, in my own way, and
thats why were getting a divorce.

Barbara Smaller (12/11/2000)

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915

child children couple couples dad dads divorce divorced divorces divorcing domestic families family father fathers general husband husbands kid kids love marriage married matrimony mom moms mother mothers parent parents relationship relationships son sons talking their wife wives young youth 166730

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What if it turns out youre not even a late bloomer?

William Hamilton (12/11/2000)

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916

age appearance appearances fights general husband husbands language late makeup marital middle money play puts relationships she talks vanity woman word 166731

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I see that you work for one of those


faith-based organizations.

David Sipress (12/11/2000)

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917

churches clergy cocktail faith-based general guest guests language life man mingle mingling modern parties party play priest religion social socialize socializing talking word work 166732

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I love this town!

George Booth (12/11/2000)

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918

age animals bench benches central chase cities city kangaroo kangaroos love man manhattan n.y. n.y.c. naked new ny nyc park parks people regional running scenes sitting through two urban watch women york 166733

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Kid, were up to here in bildungsromans.

Donald Reilly (12/11/2000)

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919

author authors bildungsroman bildungsromans book books character characters essay essays fiction growth idea literature main mans moral novel novels psychological publication publications publisher publishers publishing rejects stories story writer writers writing young 166734

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Miss Ross, get me a motivational speaker.

David Sipress (12/11/2000)

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920

assistant assistants boss bosses business businessman career careers desk employee employees employer employers exhaustion foot incompetents intercom intercoms job jobs lazy motivational occupation occupations office problems profession professions secretaries secretary sitting stress talking work worker workers working works 166735

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Why do you always get to be the gay icon?

Bruce Eric Kaplan (12/11/2000)

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921

anger attic celebrities celebrity children dress fashion game games gay gays general girls homosexual homosexuality homosexuals icon kid kids play playing transsexual two young youth 166736

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

No, leave it long in the back so I can look


like a nincompoop.

M.K. Brown (12/11/2000)

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922

appearance appearances barbers cosmetologist cosmetologists cosmetology cut cuts cutting fashion hair haircut haircuts hairdo hairdos hairdresser hairstyle hairstyles hand looking man men mirror mullet nincompoop salon salons shop shops style styles stylist stylists talking 166737

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Robert Mankoff (12/11/2000)

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923

attendant auto automobile automobiles autos car cars crime criminals drive drives driving general gun guns hand holding into lot motions one other park parking scenes sign street urban vehicle vehicles violence 166738

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I hardly think a transition team is necessary, Ed,


in order to switch from beer to Scotch.

Jack Ziegler (12/18/2000)

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924

alcohol alcoholic alcoholics bar bars bartender bartenders beer candidates cocktail cocktails colleagues drink drinking drinks drunk drunks general government inebriated intoxicated liquor man necessary politicians presidential pub surrounded talking tavern taverns transition washington 166739

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sometimes I dont read my mail.

Victoria Roberts (12/18/2000)

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925

analyst christmas claus communication correspondence depression holiday holidays letter letters office patient patients post psychiatrist psychiatrists psychiatry psychologist psychologists psychology read santa season seasons session talking therapist therapists therapy xmas 166740

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You should go and talk to Santa, dear, even though


you feel he screwed you last year.

Donald Reilly (12/18/2000)

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926

cheat cheated child children christmas claus general gift gifts holiday holidays kid kids mall mother present presents santa screw screwed season seasons shopping talking xmas young youth 166741

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Lets face it: you and this organization have


never been a good fit.

Michael Maslin (12/18/2000)

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927

all animals boss bosses business career careers cat cats dog dogs employee employees employer employers employment executive executives fire fired fires firing general good hire hires hiring interview interviewing interviews job jobs management occupation occupations office other personnel pets profession professions resume resumes talking unemployed unemployment work worker workers working works 166742

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Isnt it about time we tell the trophy wife


about the trophy concubine?

Michael Crawford (12/18/2000)

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928

adultery affair affairs bed bedroom both concubine couple couples domestic husband husbands love man marriage married matrimony relationship relationships scenes sex sexual speaking trophy wife wives woman 166743

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We were into things, but now were into experiences.

William Hamilton (12/18/2000)

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929

age cocktail consumerism experiences guests host language middle money parties play talks things travel travels wealth wine word yuppie yuppies yuppy 166744

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Youre a partner now, Cosgrove. Partners dont


do self-deprecation.

Leo Cullum (12/18/2000)

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930

another attorney attorneys board business career careers chairman ego executive executives hierarchy humor job jobs lawyer lawyers management meetings occupation occupations room self-deprecating speaking work worker workers working works 166745

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

They make me look hippy, right?

Danny Shanahan (12/18/2000)

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931

another body brawl clothing cowboys draw duel dueling duels fat fight fighting fights figure fisticuffs fitness form gun guns gunslinger hippy hips history honor mens one pistol pistols prepare regional revolver revolvers shape their violence waist western 166746

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We really need to talk about our relationship, so


Ive booked us on a TV show.

Alex Gregory (12/18/2000)

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932

couple couples entertainment fights interviews man marital marriage married matrimony media program programs relationship relationships show shows sit sofa talking television televisions tv tvs woman 166747

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (12/18/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

933

backpacks bureaucracy bursting cards education homework horn paper plenty report school schools seams student students teachers wallet 166748

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Poodle to be followed by hysterical blue-haired


widow? Sounds good.

Charles Barsotti (12/18/2000)

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934

age alligator alligators animals class cuisine dining eat eating food high kill killer killers killing meal meals menu menus murder murderer murderers murders nature order ordering orders poodles restaurant restaurants service talking waiter waiters 16674 9

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hey! Get back here!

Mick Stevens (12/18/2000)

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935

above arrows computer's computers cursor cursors float floats monitor problem problems technology 166750

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im here to fix the lasagna.

Matthew Diffee (12/18/2000)

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936

chef chefs cook cooking cooks cuisine dining domestic eat eating fix food general home homes house houses housewife lasagna recipes repair repairman repairs talking workmen 166751

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sit down, BradIve got some character-building


news for you.

Robert Mankoff (12/18/2000)

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937

boss bosses building business career careers character employee employees employer employers employment executives fire fired firing general job jobs management news occupation occupations office profession professions speaking unemployed unemployment work worker workers working works 166752

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (12/18/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

938

album collecting collections collector collectors english glass glue hobbies labeled language leisure looking magnifying philatadhesives philatelalbum philatelist philately philatifier philats stamp stamps tongue 166753

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Just what goes in these hot dogs, anyway?

Nick Downes (12/18/2000)

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939

containment dog dogs environment factories factory food hot industries industry job jobs locker manufacture manufactures manufacturing nuclear plant pollution power protective recipes rooms special suits wear work workers working 166754

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

01101001, 00111011, 00011010, hut, hut!

Pat Byrnes (12/18/2000)

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940

assembly athlete athletes binary calls cambridge code college computers football general institute massachusetts mathematics mit numbers out play quarterback sports technology television using 166755

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I suffer as much as you. I just dont let it interfere


with my ability to make others suffer.

Peter C. Vey (12/18/2000)

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941

ability another boss bosses business businessmen career careers employee employees employer employers executive executives general interfere job jobs management occupation occupations office one others profession professions sadism suffer talking work worker workers working works 166756

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I dont know about you, but my confidence in the judge


as an impartial guardian of the rule of law wasnt that
high even before the Supreme Court ruling.

Robert Mankoff (12/25/2000)

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942

african american americans blacks candidates cell cellmate cells convict convicts crime crimes criminal criminals election gore government jail jails presidential prison prisoner prisoners prisons speaking speaks vice-pres white 166757

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I need more time to study your decision.

Frank Cotham (12/25/2000)

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943

boy cartoon child children court dad dads decision discipline election families family father fathers forth general kid kids legal likely most mull over parent parents punishment requests ruling satirizes set son sons study supreme talking young youth 166758

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

His volumes speak silences.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (12/25/2000)

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944

author authors book books cocktail essay essays fiction general guest guests language literature man mingle mingling novel novels parties party play publication publications publishing silence social socialize socializing speaking speaks stories story volumes woman word writer writers writing 166759

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Last time he came out to play with you he went bankrupt.

Peter C. Vey (12/25/2000)

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945

bankrupt briefcase-carrying budget budgets business children dollar doorstep economics economy executives family finance finances games general income invest investing investment investments invests kid kids man market money people rich riches stock stockbrokers stocks talking wealth wealthy woman youth 166760

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I was going to chuck it all, burn my bridges, and go off


to Paris to write my novel, but I didnt have enough
frequent-flier miles.

David Sipress (12/25/2000)

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946

airplane author authors book books dates essay essays europe fiction france frequent-flier leisure literature man novel novelists novels publication publications publishing restaurant restaurants social stories story talking tourism tourist tourists travel traveling travels trip trips vacation vacations woman writer writers 166761

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im not wearing any underwear.

Sam Gross (12/25/2000)

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947

another atomic both clothes clothing energy fashion flirtations love man nuclear one pickups protection radiation scenes science scientists suit suits theyre underwear 166762

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

It makes you stop and think, There, but for the


grace of God, goes somebody I fired.

John Caldwell (12/25/2000)

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948

bum bums business career careers drunk employee employees employment executives fire fired firing grace homeless job jobs management occupation occupations pass poor poverty street tramp tramps two unemployed unemployment work worker workers working works 166763

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Yes, as far as I know, songbirds write their own material.

Victoria Roberts (12/25/2000)

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949

birds child children copyright dad dads daughter daughters entertainment families family father fathers general kid kids music parent parents sing singing songwriters talking young youth 166764

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The Internet startup had only enough cash for one


more day. But, miraculously, the money lasted for
eight days, until more venture capital could
be raised.
J.B. Handelsman (12/25/2000)

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950

budget budgets business capital celebration chanukah computers dollar economics economy father finance finances hanukah holiday holidays income jews judaism money new religion rich riches season seasons story tells venture version wealth wealthy 166765

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (12/25/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

951

addictions ahead alcohol alcoholics bars big career careers christmas claus deserve drink drinking elf elves enablers encourage escape general go guy harder helpers holiday holidays into little nobody occupation occupations santa -santas season seasons than who winter work worker workers working works workshop xmas 166766

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Whenever youre ready.

Charles Barsotti (12/25/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

952

animals art artists begin dogs general model modeling models painter painters painting pets portrait portraits portraiture pose poses posing ready scratch scratching stop subject waits 166767

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

An excellent question, Sylvia, and I thank you for the


opportunity to use whilst in my response.

Lee Lorenz (12/25/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

953

ego entertainment face interviewers interviews journalism language man media panel play politicians program programs questions show shows speaking television televisions tv tvs vocabulary whilst work 166768

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

One things for sure. Well have to mend our evil


ways when Hillary shows up.

Donald Reilly (12/25/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

954

another arrival both campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates capitol clinton clintons congress desk drink drinking -elect election elections ethics evil government inspires liquor lobbyists mend not office ones places platform politicians politics public remark sen senate senator senators term two upcoming washington 166769

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Now close your eyes and go to sleep or Daddy will


read you more of his novel.

Danny Shanahan (12/25/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

955

author authors bed book books child children dad dads daughter daughters discipline essay essays families family father fathers fiction hand kid kids literature night novel novelists novels parent parents publication publications publishing read reading rest sleep stories story talking writer writers writing young youth 166770

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Night before Christmas or no night before


Christmas, I feel like stirring.

Robert Weber (12/25/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

956

all animals another christmas clarke claus clement creature even feel feeling general hole holiday holidays house household literature mice moore mouse next not one out peering poem poems poetry presents santa season seasons stir stirring threatening through twas was when xmas 166771

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

At what do you toil?

Edward Koren (12/25/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

957

beat beatniks boss bosses business businessmen career careers challenges cocktail employee employees employer employers flirtations forlorn general generation guest guests hippies job jobs looking love man mingle mingling occupation occupations office parties party pickups profession professions punks scenes social socialize socializing talking toil woman work worker workers working works 166772

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Alex Gregory (12/25/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

958

available booths celebrities elvis entertainment graceland ironic irony leisure memphis museums non-ironic presley regional tennessee ticket tourism tourist tourists tours travel traveling travels trip trips two vacation vacations visitors windows 166773

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Frank Cotham (12/25/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

959

behind book books bring cell cells closes convict convicts crime crimes criminal criminals damn door forgot general images jail jails leisure mental prison prisoner prisoners prisoners prisons thoughts travel writing 166774

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

There are many questions, of course, that wont


be answered till the autopsy.

Leo Cullum (12/25/2000)

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960

autopsy dead death die disease diseases doctor doctors dying exam examination examinations exams fitness health hospital hospitals ill illness incompetents medical patient patients physician physicians questions sick sickness speaking surgeon surgeons surgery 166775

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Watch out for his right, kid!

Gahan Wilson (12/25/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

961

advice box boxer boxers boxers boxing coach coaches fight fights general giant-sized gigantic hand injured opposing prizefighter prizefighters refers right ring rings round rounds sports trainer violence 166776

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What do I think is an appropriate punishment? I think


an appropriate punishment would be to make me live
with my guilt.

Barbara Smaller (12/25/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

962

after breaks child children crime discipline families family guilt kid kids lamp large mom moms mother mothers parent parents psychobabble punishment son sons speaking young youth 166777

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If you are travelling with small children or if you just


need a little extra time, we invite you to board the
aircraft at this time.

Peter Steiner (12/25/2000)

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963

airline airplane airplanes animals announces attendant boarding dog farm flight flock fly flying herd herds numerous plane planes prepare procedure rural sheep shepherd shepherds stand terminal travel 166778

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (12/25/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

964

author authors back behind best-seller bestsellers book bookcase books caption dismayed either essay essays features fiction finally front general get going include incompetents isnt job lawbook-filled literature lots magazine magazines man media mid-list middle-aged more new not-ready-for-prime novel novelists novels page periodical periodicals publication publications publisher publishers publishing real says scribble sits stares stories story those time title what why writer writers youre 166779

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I say fiesta, you say siesta.

Victoria Roberts (12/25/2000)

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965

age arguing argument arguments cliche cliches english excited fiesta fighting fights george gershwin husband ira laid-back langauge language likes man marital marriage middle nap party problem problems relationships she siesta son songs spanish speaking tomato wants while woman 166780

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

So your testimony is that by the time you found


Mr. Peanut he was already shelled. Is that correct?

Michael Maslin (12/25/2000)

Return to Main Menu 3

966

animals attorney attorneys being circus client clients court courtroom courtrooms courts crime death defendant defendants dining eat eating elephant elephants food judge judges law lawyer lawyers murder murderer murderers murders peanuts pets questioned scenes stand trial trials witness witnesses 166781

2000

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Matthew Diffee (12/25/2000)

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