Documenti di Didattica
Documenti di Professioni
Documenti di Cultura
149
March
"72
OUR PRICE
CHEAP?
33230
IF YOU CAN'T
BRING YOURSELF
TO JOIN'EM...
OFTHt
NUMBER 149
"Alimony
MARCH 1972
VITAL FEATURES
TRULY
RELEVANT
TV
SHOWS
Pg.8
W A
THE SPORTS
SPECTATORS
HALL OF
FAME
Pg.16
DEPARTMENTS
ATHLETIC SUPPORTERS DEPARTMENT
The Sports Spectators Hall of Fame
16
20
34
7
25
FOCUS-POCUS DEPARTMENT
A MAD Guide To Late Night Cliche Movie Props
28
40
A MAD GUIDE
TO TV LATE
SHOW CLICHE
MOVIE PROPS
Pg.28
8
YOU KNOW
YOU'RE REALLY
GROWN UP
WHEN...
Pg.32
INSIDE-OUCH DEPARTMENT
A MAD Peek Behind The Scenes At A Moving Company .. .37
JOKE AND DAGGER DEPARTMENT
Spy Vs. Spy
19
LETTERS DEPARTMENT
Random Samplings Of Reader Mail
**
42
14
32
A MAD PEEK
BEHIND THE
SCENES AT A
MOVING CO.
Pg.37
4
.26
"WILLIES"
(A MAD
MOVIE
SATIRE)
Pg.42
LETTERS DEPT.
LITTLE DULL M A N
SHELF-PITY?
MEET SUDHIR DAR
FIFTY-TWO
PAPERBACK BOOKS
O N SALE AT ALL BOOKSTANDS
OR YOURS BY MAIL FOR 6 0 * EACH
use coupon or duplicate
MAD
485 MADison Avenue
New York, N.Y. 10022
PLEASE SEND ME
ZJ The MAD Reader
D MAD Strikes Back
Inside MAD
Utterly MAD
The Brothers MAD
[ ] The Bedside MAD
D Son of MAD
D The Organization MAD
Like MAD
The Ides of MAD
CJ Fighting MAD
The MAD Frontier
MAD in Orbit
D The Voodoo MAD
Greasy MAD Stuff
D Three Ring MAD
D Self-Made MAD
The MAD Sampler
World, World, etc. MAD
Raving MAD
Boiling MAD
D Questionable MAD
n Howling MAO
The Indigestible MAD
Burning MAD
D Good 'n' MAD
Hopping MAD
The Portable MAD
D MAD Power
The Dirty Old MAD
Polyunsaturated MAD
DON MARTIN Steps Out
DON MARTIN Bounces Back
DON MARTIN Drops 13 Stones
MAD's Captain Klutz
DON MARTIN Cooks
DON MARTIN Comes On Strong
G The All-New SPY vs. SPY
P SPY vs. SPY Follow-Up File
D A MAD Look at Old Movies
D Return of MAD Old Movies
3 AL JAFFEE's Snappy Answers
G The MAD Book of Magic
G Aragones's "Viva MAD"!'
G Aragones's MAD about MAD
D MAD for Better or Verse
[ I Sing Along With MAD
D DAVE BERG Looks at the USA
G DAVE BERG Looks at People
G DAVE BERG Looks at Things
G DAVE BERG Modern Thinking
G DAVE BERG Our Sick World
NAME
ADDRESS
CITY
STATE
ZIP CODE
A. TOTAL N0.
COPlES PRINTED
B. PAID CIRCULATION
1. SALES THROUGH
DEALERS & CARRIERS,
STREET VENDORS &
COUNTER SALES
2. MAIL SUBSCRIPTIONS
C. TOTAL PAID
CIRCULATION
0 , FREE DISTRIBUTION
BY MAIL, CARRIER OR
OTHER MEANS
1. SAMPLES, COMPLIMENTARY, AND OTHER
FREE COPIES
2. COPIES DISTRIBUTED
TO NEWS AGENTS BUT
NOT SOLD
E. TOTAL DISTRIBUTION
F. OFFICE USE, LEFT-OVER,
UNACCOUNTED, SPOILED
AFTER PRINTING
G. TOTAL
2,557,776
1,743,818
2,897,200
1,955,198
101,507
101,345
1,845,325
2,056,543
54
57
711,797
840,000
2,557,176
2,896,600
600
2,557,776
600
2,897,200
At your "Custer's Last Stand" press conference, none of the reporters inquired as
to the role of the CIA, Counting Indians
Accurately, in the action. Actually, through
imperfect information, provided by his
scouts, Custer figured his men could handle the "only 1,200 or 1,500 Indians" reported. Silverstone and Schild have created
a biting parallel in this feature, exposing
two eras of American History, in which
the heads of State couldn't care less whom
they sent to the Unhappy Hunting
Grounds.
C. H. Ware
Pine Bluff, Ark.
w'.>
mfl^m
ii -...--''
SUBSCRIBE TO
...
k*\-ir>
use coupon or duplicate
MAD
485 MADison Avenue
AMP
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CITY
STATE
ZIP CODE
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Check drawn on a U.S.A. Bank. Allow 10 weeks for subscription to be processed. We cannot be
responsible for cash lost or stolen in the mails, so CHECK OR MONEY ORDER PREFERRED!
ROAD SIGNS WE
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PHOTOS BY:
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DANGER
AHEAD
ONE DARK A
LONELY NIGH
TRULY "RELEVA
A R T I S T : A N G E L O TORRES
STOREFRONT
BROADCASTERS
:
~m
nilr I'IJLV 9^M^
It may not be
much, but it's a
first step in
giving Television
programming back
to the people!
And taking it
away from the
money-grubbing
Establishment
. ..Power
Structure!
so-called "Relevant" shows never quite get around to taking the worst exploiters of all
to task? For some mysterious reason, broadcasters haven't yet discovered a single thing
wrong with the Television Industry itself, or the Sponsors that support it! And so, MAD
envisions the day when TV finally gets around to scrutinize itself, and finds a whole
new source of material for spine-tingling drama. Then, maybe, we'll start seeing some . . .
NT" TV SHOWS
WRITER: TOM KOCH
1_
J__
---^ir-
LJBIfc XJR-STS^
It's ridiculous!
So how come they're
beating us in the j
ratings, 37 to 7?!
v/
f
NOW, Mr. Grump?!
There's a plane
crashing right
outside the
building...'.
What's shaping
up as our lead
story for "The
Six O'Clock
News", Maury?
I didn't
hear about
that! Did
you, Maury?
/
That sadistic
cop got me
again, Mr.
Grump . . . !
Hey, is the
script ready
for "The Six
O'Clock News"
WWf
BARNEY
Furdley Products!
Imagine! Me an ] They're introducing
Account Executive! a revolutionary new
Who's the client? I Elbow Deodorant!
,^'lm,
Forget logic
and honesty!
You're a TV
advertising
Executive now!
You're
right!
I'll try
harder to
be a crook
tomorrow!
^^A^
I'll
raise the
price to
$4.98!
JJ_ J I L L
I offerto put you in charge of the entire
Acme Cuticle-Stretcher account.. . and you
dare to ask me "Who needs long cuticles?"!
You're demoted back to the Loading Dock!
Yessir! I'm
leaving now!
I don't deserve
anything better!
THE F.D.A.
Our lab report confirms
it, Chief! Those "tiny
time capsules" don't
bring twelve hours of
blessed relief at all!
HAWAII
CHANNEL FIVE-0
ftkmhFttlt^'^^v **!****^}.
1
m *\ >
'rf, VL
4.
JLL
You know, you could
lose your Broadcaster's
License for attempting
to bribe an F.C.C. man!
JL_
That's
more
like
it!
RALPH NADER
Music Publishers
Brill Building
New York CityDear Mr. Nader:We are in receipt of your recent letter.
As publishers of "In Your Merry Oldsmobile",
we think you've gone out of your gourd, Man!
Your claim that this song is "unsafe" and
should not be sung "at any speed is, like,
ridiculous! No doubt about it, Man, you are
a "nut" and a "fanatic"!
Groovingly yours,
so is
ifsar^-g sj ^r - -.-
Alertly yours,
Sam Bobrick
President
R
p
h a V e c n du c d
r y'ycu u s e , n d h ^ e
alph Nader
nthe s t a t i
cont
destruction of our ^
ributed to the
a* in Ne W York C i t V T w l i T ^ Ne *t t i ^ l
Mrs.
Agatha N a d e r
R.N.
beivi p.aH/jMJi/'
Sellers
W a s h i n g t o n , D.C.
Ralphie, Baby!
Vie're in luck!
SliU, ixxxidge
.-
ano ther
Men's
fitting suits .
_
there im.
Vie suggest that you g
yQU
mediately and V W three or f o u r h o B e 8 p u n
can continue to | ^ c l o t h e s " image to
"too-busy-to-care
^
the public.
f o r e e t to picK up the
Also, don't forget the 1957 style
usual ''square'' accessories. : , nd _ wear
a*td ckwa^d
n^aJi^AJ
n ^Remember, the
^ I f f r X 1 -
dents!
Ui^afiJtLj
g?g*5J5?.
^st two PresiSincerely yours,
/
Bud
14
E. Sellers
WRITER
A R N I E KOGEI*
IDENTIFICATION
NAME jSMkUMd@&^
mmms.
^ :,:.:,
TfUPHONE.
r
mm
ilA OF AUTOHOWIE.
I: .OCCUPATION lcM^Cmm&
IfHWHiiiini
^CUston7er.
,D C
- -Branch
Would yon u
"
c)i/ilwMMT~
ntsDl
vision
It
Things To Do Today!
Pot^^C^u^oha^a[naki>rr
4. Invest^
^^
PROFESSIO
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ijjy.r yoJUjj-
16
fan" who pays his way into the stadium knowing he'll be fleeced and inconvenienced at every turn or merely an
amateur" enduring dreary week-ends of TV sports viewing at home, he suffers far more than the players who never
have to stand in ticket lines or watch commercials during time-outs. Yessiree, MAD thinks it's high time we
started honoring our true heroes, and we hereby nominate these outstanding fans to charter membership in
'HALL OF FAME
m
NAL
DIVISION
W R I T E R : T O M KOCH
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?JMMM
THE
LIGHTER
SIDE OF...
I'm quitting school...
because with all the good
my teachers are doing me,
I might as well not go!
I know! I have
such a teacher
this year!
So speak to him
about what you're
planning to do!
li.
~\T~
1
As little as possible!
Why shouldn't
I drop out?
The world is
coming to an
end, anyway!
You hear
what kind
of defeatist
thing your
son is saying?
V"
j]
Y
'i'
^S^*"**88***^
m^..
tiZA
KM
Gloria!
What
happened?!
You're young
and strong!
Why don't you
go out and
worklike me?!
SobIt's Sidney!
Hesobhe's
DROPPED OUT!
AHHH...WHOCARES!?!|
He sayssobthat nothing
he's learning now will be
of any value later on, so
he'sdroppingsobout!
FROM NURSERY
SCHOOL?!?
Oh-oh! Here
we go with
"Why can't
you be like
Anthony?"
again!
I used to be a high-salaried
advertising executive, packaging
and promoting phony products!
Then one day I got fed up and
came out here where I found the
true and only way! Now, all day
ong, I just sit and meditate!
-"TiT^
tell you
where
we went
wrong!
*.
Listen, you!
From now on,
things aren't
going to be so
EASY for you
around here!
HOLD IT RIGHT
THERE, BUSTER!
if/
4,
I feel like
in school again!
^""^Si
Jfcft
That's right!
I DID say
that, didn't I!
dropped
out of
I school!
SO GET OFF
MY BACK,
ALREADY!!
YOU DID?!? So
how come the
school didn't
notify me?!?
-rW
8855KZ
THIRTY!!
mJk
What's the use of going to
school!? Everything we learn
is irrelevant! Like what good
is it to learn History?!
Z)
a<=
fAglfl
If you really want to find out how life is going for someone, don't bother to investigate him or tap his phone
Harry Grepser's
NEW YEAR'S
1962
1965
3.9uM
4 | Q uJJt r W 4atnuj
bo^>
beckA a Lfean..
6. 9 (jjiiL y^ot <%zJt tup^et UAVZAA.
Ckxvdlie. a#>d ACWM waake ^keb
QbovCf~wuj bacl^^>6.
deum helow l&O.
8. 9 nAft rvdt tai-az. q ctaU-Jc
btycyQ 3 p.
fruvoioaAtlu.
10. Q IAJWL A<? AMJ d&Atu>tTJ>vU>
v
26
iwt&/ecl
5. 9 uML^joJoi-^AJ^ (O book*
(p. 9 UflM. T^ tydt 6Uv*Oi{c{ vuUtlYl
about t ^ 'toupee..
~1. 9 UAJQL urdtck wud( caicyu.^
IMZ'JL 9 <$dt beleto 190.
6. 9 UJWL KVOT ibufik -CU*. bottk
b^iotg/noo-W.
9. 9 unJUL pan ofys nj b W c
goCui.
pflcwpULj.
13. 9 ^ p ^
t6h^:vfc$P%
CKX ^jx^t CTHCJL. a. oje&k..
&sm
All you have to do is study his New Year's Resolutions. They tell all. If you don't believe us, just study.
RESOLUTIONS
W R I T E R : FRANK JACOBS
1962-1972
1969
fW_t/nt<3 G*AGiMeS[_
1972
rv&AAAaQQ.
ULCLA, .
A. S
o^-tML'&t.tfbd^c^ci
OUA*MI
9.
ucuUL- p&\
(*jT>\A<- da*.e.
o(&
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^e/L.
STVU
F O C U S - P O C U S DEPT.
If you're a "TV Late Show" film buff, you're probably aware of the important
roles certain "props" played in old movies. In fact, some of these "props"
A MAD GUID
SHOW" CLICH
MONSTER MOVIE TORCH
CATHEDRAL RADIO
w.
M(f;
Device used to interrupt love scenes
. . . and engagements . . . with announcement that the Japanese have attacked
Pearl Harbor. Hero and heroine defer
BROKEN AMULET NECKLACE
fcefe.
iy....
Test pilots Tom and Jim both love Sue.
One of them has to test the dangerous
X-14. Jim, convinced that Sue loves
Tom, pretends to let him take up the
X-14. But when Tom looks up to check
the weather, Jim hits him on the head
with the prop wrench, takes the X-14
up himself, and is never seen again.
28
were used so often, they actually achieved "cliche" status. For those of you
who don't know what in heck we're talking about, we now present this article:
E TO "TV LAT E
E MOVIE PROPS
SUSPENSION MICROPHONE
THIS-WILL-MAKE-YOU-TALK
HYPODERMIC NEEDLE
ARTIST:
ANGELO TORRES
WRITER:
PAUL PETER PORGES
1
if
ilia
M
BAIL OF NEWSPAPERS
I
RE-BREATHING BAG
EXTENSION TELEPHONE
m**#m
%
m,m
*#.
> -
lift
*~m'$&i'J
-'^
the adrenalin!" If injection works,
bag will resume expansion and contraction. If bag remains deflated, Surgeon
will snap off rubber gloves and throw
them to the floor in disgust while the
Nurse solemnly pulls a sheet over body.
EASILY-SMASHED MIRROR
* " % " .#
^S!S,:,o,:,.JKtSi
H O P
' ^ , ,
ipfit
m
-
i...
>is S I
'. I I
..' v '
>-c
j L
!%
t t"
faga**""
mmm
You can bet your life that in almost or heroine will be spied upon through
every mystery-horror film that takes the cut-out eyes of the old portrait
place in a creepy old house, our hero hanging over the fireplace . . . or bed.
"AMERIKANISCHER SCHWEINHUND"
PERISCOPE
""! %.'m^MjSf>^^\
.'T~l|
l:,:i.tl,*i'.,:.',iU
^?I.'
WMi
'SlfK-fitg,
TUMBREL CART
[>":.
musk
ills
1:1 Mf'i/: / \
SliiiliiiiMlt
mm
,-^iifc.
GROWN UP When
You Know You're REALLY
GROWN UP When . . .
%LXJJ 1 /
. . . you act up at a party, you're something called the "life" of it. . . and
you don't have to go back the next day to apologize for your behavior.
1\
DISTINCTIVE BIRTH
FROM A WOMEN'S LIB MEMBER
::
Ova
May 20,1971
FROM A HORSE-PLAYER
FROM AN ASTROLOGER
rs. / v c t u r u s Sh apiro
regret to announce the birth
ot a <Uancer=l,eo cusp
with Aries rising; the moon in Sagittarius,
A/|ars in Scorpio, a n a Saturn in opposition
to /Vlercury, Jupiter, 1 Neptune a n a Fluto
If
""',',"'"'.'.'"*H'',lffiVnrr
ANNOUNCEMENTS
F R A N K JACOBS
FROM AN HISTORIAN
Mr. 1 a n d Mrs. 2 E s t e r h a z y 3
a r e pleased t o a n n o u n c e
t h e birth 4
of a son, Boris"'
June 26.1971
October 14,1971
|
I
1
1 George.
2 Ernestine.
3 No relation to French army officer Ferdinand Esterhazy, who
figured prominently in the Dreyfus Affair.
4 A t Mercy Hospital, 5th floor, Delivery Room B.
5 After Boris III, ruler of Bulgaria (1918-1943).
6 Nine hundred and fifth anniversary of the Battle of Hastings, in
which William the Conqueror led the N o r m a n s against the Saxons,
under Harold, a n d won, after a n entire day's fighting, a decisive
victory, in fact t h e most i m p o r t a n t of the N o r m a n Conquest of
England, which led to massive changes in English politics, trade,
architecture, religion and way of life.
FROM A MEDIUM
JMadame Olga
and her husband
JAax the ^Mystic
are profoundly awe i
to announce the
reincarnation
of
Alexander the Qreat
Six pounds, seven ounces
July it, 1971
35
ANNOUNCE
THE BIRTH
Freen, Major Julius Augustus, West Point '61
tactically supported by
Freen, Henrietta Dorothy, wife
announces the birth, Caesarian
of
Freen, Dwight Douglas Ulysses, West Point '93
Infant, male, bouncing, 8 pounds, 3 ounces
OF A DAUGHTER
LAVINIA
OCTOBER 14, 1956
S August 1971
SUDDENLY
IT'S
STARRING
Dr. Quincy Fernfeather
WITH
Nurse Elma Forbush
AND
The Maternity Ward Staff Of
St. Theresa's Hospital
PRODUCED AND DIRECTED BY
City Hospital
July 2, 1971
FROM A PSYCHIATRIST
FROM AN ACCOUNTANT
I N S I D E - O U C H DEPT.
MOVING COMPANY
ARTIST: GEORGE WOODBRIDGE
r~z.
':
Wmmmmam
iff^mr
us:: ma
i'
_____
_ M
(-
.. ;
1
ft '
rV^
Of course I do . . . !
|_J
Then you'll need two
Three steps is a lot when
___,T men besides the drivei
driver
you're carrying heavy
furniture! Let's see . . .
j l
to carry the furniture!
J l
Are there
- - . - any
. , stairs?
. ... that comes to $45 an hour.
j1 '1=1=5' | j3E g: 3 |5( " " ' " ' . J ' J I
plus an hour's travel time!
I \ - t * P ? f ^ A 4 * i ^ ) t - v t 11
.__-__
We live on the ground
^ s
floor but there are
But I only live a block
.7
three small steps . . .
away from your place!
s*t M l ,
;- : ,.-"P
t mm
f Iffcl
. 37,
:H>
This is
highly
skilled
work! Have
you had any
experience?
lltef/iflp
Slow-!
Take it
easy!
Gently!
Watch it,
now . . . !
gsrw ;
Since when is
Pete getting
so careful? He
usually don't
care WHAT
he breaks!!
Except for
mirrors! He's
superstitious!
He'll break
anything but
a mirror!.
* t #
S3 i
:JM
'V II
\F
{((&M
k iJf
LULUi
Sorry, Harvey . . .
but you're fired!
You know the rules
. . . Never carry
more than one
thing at a time!
..i
But all
I was
carrying
was this
lamp!
Man,
dig
THIS!
A size
38-C!
WOW!!
V!
fill
:>;
f>'*
^Cis''
* ' V i mmmmmm w
1
TVv^
. sSjilifiSiilgg
:--^a
Aw . . . an'
1 finally
got this
couch
broke in
right!
~
" ^
>mm. f\
Gee, I'm
gonna
miss
this
color
TV set!
clikdream
the impossible
dreamclik
dream the
impossible
dreamclik
te#fiSl
tat
3k
Sits S i
^" ; rU-
lU. 'flf***
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-c
-
Congratulations,
Sam! You've been
named "Moving Man
Of The Week" for
taking twelve
hours on one job!
Yeah . . . but I
was moving a
customer from
one apartment to
another in the
same building!
S^'liP^R
What do you
mean you're not
responsible?!
| Your ad said
you're insured
against any
damage!!
Joe Fingerhut
called and
said he won't
be in to work
today because
he's moving!
He KNOWS
what it
would be
y^
like if
WE
moved him!
PRESIDENT
NIXON
SNOW
*?^rf
*
PENTAGON
SECURITY
THAW
Shows up whenever the winds that blow
away appropriations start to stir. The
thick coat of ice around the Pentagon
softeus, and information leaks appear
which show how far we are behind the
Russians in ICBM and ABM strength.
WILLIAM
FULBRIGHT
GUSTS
These chronic blasts of wind are most
prevalent near Washington, D.C., where
residents have come to regard them as
part of the unavoidable drawbacks of
the area. They are said to be capable
of blowing over half the U.S. Senate.
MARTHA
MITCHELL
GALES
These explosions of hot air most often
develop after a series of FULBRIGHT
GUSTS. Completely unpredictable, the
blasts are prone to dissipate after a
short period of time, wasting their
energy by blowing in all directions.
FIDEL
CASTRO
RAIN
Similar to the rain that has fallen on
Russia for years, this downpour hits
with such force that raised voices in
opposition cannot be heard. Recently,
it has been casting a shadow over the
rest of the Caribbean . . . particularly
on those islands which do not have
the protection of a nuclear umbrella.
40
AGNEW
THUNDER
These menacing rumbles are constantly
exploding over critical areas of the
country, especially when the criticism
is directed against the Administration.
Sometimes drowned out by a LIBERAL
SQUALL, its noise is almost always
followed by a storm of NIXON SNOW.
RALPH
NADER
HEATWAVE
This hot spell has afflicted Detroit
for some time, causing many residents
of that city to sweat profusely. Now,
a strange native ritual termed "recall" is being practiced by some. in
hopes of driving off the awful demon.
HARD
HAT
STORM
This dangerous reaction is caused by
abrasive contact with conflicting elements from the opposite pole! Can grow
violent even when passing near to such
elements, and often causes cranial and
body injuries to be felt by the unwary.
TIMOTHY
LEARY
FOG
This dangerous abberation occurs most
often on or near campuses or communes.
Hazardous to visibility and perception,
it has caused many kids who have been
trapped in it to completely lose touch
with reality and the surrounding world.
GENE
MCCARTHY
DRIZZLE
Once thought to be the source of great
currents and tides, it has dwindled to
a little-noticed cloud, drifting about
the Democratic Party. Its occasional
drops are but a shadow of the violent
storm it caused in the Midwest in '68.
RONALD
REAGAN
SMOG
STOKELY
CARMICHAEL
ECLIPSE
GEORGE
WALLACE
SLIME
Every once in a while, a movie comes along that makes you feel crawly all over! Every once in
a while, a movie comes along that's so disgusting, it makes you climb the walls . . . that's so
nauseating, it makes you scream in hysteria . . . that's so sickening, it makes you run from the
theater, retching. We're talking, of course, about "Love Story"! But since we did that one
already, here is MAD'S version of another recent movie . . . one that simply gives you the . . .
ARTIST: MORT DRUCKER
Is Mr.
Martinet
coming
to
Williespa rty?
Why did
you ask Mr
Martinet!?
I can't
stand him!
> /:'
Nobody
understands
me . . .
~i_r
Willies, the hot water
heater is broken, the
furnace stopped
working, the plumbing
is leaking,the toilets
don't flush, and all the
drains are backed up!
When are you going
to FIX something!
In time,
Mother!
Didn't
I fix
the
pencil
sharpener
yesterday?
Yes! I fedr
them all!'
And what
about the
rats in the
backyard?
Did you
take care
of them?
Stop it,
Willies!!
Sometimes
I think
you want
to get
rid of
ME!!
Don't be
ridiculous.
Mother!
Here! Take
a few dozen
sleeping
pills and
try to
rest!
a t e m p o r a r y girl . . .
That's
the first
thing
anyone
ever said
to me that
makes
sense!
l t T T
r-
^ -
Hmmmm! Maybe
there's a good
reason they're
all tough
on you!
Okay, you guys! I promised Mom I'd get all the rats '
out of the backyard, so you're going to have to
live down here in our basement from now on! I'll
try to make it as comfortable as possible for you!
I've already called the garbage men, and they're
going to drop off two full cans a day, so . . .
Willies!!
Wh-what is
thatthat
THING
on your
shoulder?!?
That huge
thing is
dandruff?!
Relax,
Mother!
It's
only
dandruff!
Well,
your
dandruff
is eating
my
flowers!!
300 loaves of
bread, 200 lbs.
of cheese, 100
boxes of cereal
. . . and a sixpack of beer!
-i_r
i_r You idiot! No wonder so few people
You mailed
Willies, are
answered! It's going to be a flop!!
all 100
you sure you
of them?!?
mailed those
invitations
Don't feel bad! Maybe Oh, rats!
to my party?
you'll have a lot of
Absolutely!
unexpected company | T a | k a b o u t
Here . . . I'll
H r n n n i n o in t n n i o h t l ''
.
count them!
jWIV
i_r
'iiia/ v?Kixi^jgpEL.
Where did you
get your
divine turkeys
Mr. Martinet?
l_r
j^ggjg^
It's about time you got here, Willies!
First, get these invoices finished! Then,
file these orders! Then, make out these
production reports! Then, sweep the plant!
Then, go home . . . your Mother's very sick!
Wh-what
happened
to my
Mother?
Willies,
she went
to meet
ler maker!
Don't
hand me
that!
She
hasn't
had a
boyfriend
in years!
Noshe
DIED!
And her
last words
were,
"Charlatan,
take care
of Willies!"
Willies, I've
probated your
late Mother's
will, and she
left you
this house!
_rWhere
will you
get the money
to do THAT?!?
Thanks,
but I'll
pay off
everything
WITHOUT
selling
the house!
Just watch
this next
unbelievable
scene . . .
-ilj.ii
S M A R T . . . !!
_ .
/
\
<
'
'
ffiU
_ -teSTO
' ' '''
til
:
' . ! ' : .
' ,
" . ' .
'.;
[ / . W W
~l<;HOKE!
GAG!
A RAT!
A
RAT!
_r
No, there's
Why? Just
because I
fired two
people?!?
a rat in
Accounts
Payable!
'
J?
2S
=' * -:.
m-:
mm
1 fired! W
sTS
M was H
1 I! ill
Sparks! This
company is
the world's
largest
manufacturer
of SPARKS!!
i L5
a\~v
T.
HIM
UP!
f^k&i
:A
X
. ' ' -
Gee,
that's
really
a shame!
UAR
K.
iM_.
ZZLZZXII
J L
~kTuJ"uI
RATS ARE
HORRIBLE!
NOT LOVEABLE
LIKE YOU'VE
MADE THEM!
GET
HIM!
TEAR
HIM
UP!!
"%'
V3-
ife i
to
ws
T
Boy, Human
Beings can
really be
disgusting!
'&.
:i
WHAT RECENT
BY-PRODUCT
OF AMERICAN
INDUSTRY
IS WINNING
THE PUBLIC'S
CONFIDENCE?
MAD FOLD-IN
Throughout history, many unforeseen and unintentional
developments have changed the course of business in
America. Recently, however, an unexpected bi-product
of our industrial community has captured the public's
imagination. To find out what it is, fold in the page.
A*
+B