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Effective Communication

at workplace

By
Asad Ur Rehman
Assistant Professor
Department of Computing
Hamdard Institute of Engineering & Technology

Hamdard University

My Introduction
2

Affiliated with IT industry for over 24 years.

Assistant Professor at Hamdard University

Executive Director - Open Integrated Systems (Pvt) Ltd.

Was Director Sales & Operation - Business Beam.

Was Chief Operating Officer - Plexus (Pvt) Limited.

Was Chief Technology Officer - Feditec (Pvt) Limited.

Worked as Process Consultant for Kolson Industries.

President in 2003 for Junior Chamber International.

Secretary General of Software Ponder Alliance

Certified SW Quality Professional (CSQP) from PIQC

Certified Business Analysis Professional (CBAP)


Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Hamdard University

Some Beautiful Quotes

Beautiful quotes
4

Dont curse the darkness, light a candle.


- (Chinese Proverb)

Be a light, not a judge.


Be a model, not a critic.
- (Stephen Covey)
Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Beautiful quotes
5

Little deeds of kindness,


little words of affection,
help to make earth happy like the
heaven above."
- (Julia Fletcher Carney)

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Beautiful quotes
6

Kind words can be short and easy to speak,


but their echoes are truly endless.
- (Mother Theresa of Calcutta)

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Effective Communication
at Workplace
Be better than, you were yesterday

Hamdard University

Effective Communication at Workplace


8

The quality of
your life . .
. . is the quality of
your communication
Cannot progress in career
Cannot have good relationship
Do not have respect
. . because of poor communication
Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Effective Communication at Workplace


9

Usually we all have some small weakness in


our communication.

We face challenges in dealing with . . .

Co-workers
Students
Family
Friends
Hamdard University

Communication is powerful tool.


That can be learned & improved.

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Effective Communication at Workplace

My personal weaknesses
10

Disclaimer: I am not an communication expert


Just wanted to share what I learned in last 24
years and that worked for me.

Following were my weaknesses


Written Communication (letter/emails) had very
aggressive tone
Reasonable communication when not angry
Good behavior - with only good people
Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Natural temptation of Humans


11

You smile - the whole word smile

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Rules of Nature (realize some facts)


12

What is your habit?


Do you smile or you dont

Normal person will smile looking at


smiling face.

Your action is your decision (smile or dont)


but output is based on rules of nature

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

13

Importance of Communication
Expressed by Business Authorities

Hamdard University

Importance of Communication
14

Top executives from Fortune 500


companies rate communications skills
as the most important quality for
business leaders.
New York Times

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Importance of Communication
15

There may be no single thing more


important in our efforts to achieve
meaningful work and fulfilling
relationships than to learn and practice
the art of communication.
The Art of Leadership
Max De Pree, Author

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Importance of Communication
16

Effective Commination will . .

Builds respect
Helps make friends
Reveals your ability to others
Develops a distinct personality

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Importance of Communication
17

Effective Communication can


enhance & enrich relationship
both at work and home

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Communication Channels
18

There are a few channels for communication


Verbal & Non-verbal (face to face)
Written (letter, email)
Telephone

This session is limited to face-to-face channel


only.

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

19

Self Awareness
Some scenarios to realize common mistake

Hamdard University

Self Awareness test


20

For the awareness of your interpersonal


communication skills visit
www.Queendom.com
For your Temperament Test you may visit
www.keirsey.com

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Self Awareness

Scenarios # 1

21

I need that report by 9:00 am tomorrow.

. .

Do you understand

Instructions can be conveyed in two different


ways, You will act in your natural style

Can I have that report by 9:00 am tomorrow pls.


I have important meeting with Dean/registrar.
It is very important for me to show that report.
Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Self Awareness

Scenarios # 2

22

In the next Slide you will see small talk


between boss & office-boy.
Let me know any shortcoming
in bosss behavior

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Self Awareness

Scenarios # 2

23

Boss: I am very thirsty. Bring the water (in harsh tone)


Office-boy bring glass of cold water quickly
Boss: You stupid, my throat is infected. I cannot drink
cold water

Office-boy goes again and brings normal temperature


water

Tell three shortcomings


in this communication
Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Self Awareness

Scenarios # 2

24

Tone
Words (you stupid)

Harsh (insulting)

Polite

Meaning - - -

Just emotions (anger)

Information

Complete (maximum)

Incomplete

Instruction type

Command

Request

Earned

Respect

Disrespect

Task Completed

Not first time

More efforts required

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Self Awareness

Scenarios # 3

25

I am at restaurant and ordering


food (biryani).
That can be done in different
ways.
Option-1
Waiter is taking somebodys order.
Wave my hand and loudly say,
Waiter - bring biryani quickly with Raita and salad
I am in a rush

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Self Awareness

Scenarios # 3

26

I am at restaurant and
ordering food (biryani).
Anything to do with
politeness, respectful,
& clear message ?

Option-2
Waiter is taking somebodys order. I wait for him
When he come I ask, what is your name? Zahoor
Zahoor Bhai! do you have good biryani? Yes
What is the difference
Ok bring one Biryani
in both approach?
Do you have salad and Raita, please bring both
Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Self Awareness

Scenarios # 4

27

Our office boy is Mustafa


You can order tea in different ways
Option-1
Mustafa bring tea for me. Hurry up
(in a aggressive tone)
Usually we act in oru natural style
What is your style (or habit)

Option-2
Mustafa Bhai can I have tea please ?
Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Any Lesson Learned ?


28

Is it only words coming out from mouth ?


Or something to do with your thinking or
believes?

Different message & different impression is


transferred by your actions based on your
thoughts & believes.

Different actions will develop different


relationship.

A wrong sentence can develop an enemy.


Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Lesson Learned
29

Your communication based on your thoughts

Experiences
Thoughts
Believes

1. You listen or observe something


2. You process in mind
3. You say something

Words
When you are not
emotionally charged
Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Self Awareness

Scenarios # 5

30

Your response based on your thoughts

I delivered a session on Time-Management


Somebody pointed out few weakness
in that session.

I could react in different ways

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Self Awareness

Scenarios # 5

31

Option-1
You know how much experience I am?
You know I am much older than you and my beard is
white. I cannot be wrong.

Option-2
Thanks for your valuable input.
I will make sure to overcome these weaknesses.
What is the difference
in both approach?
Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

32

Hamdard University

Communication

Communication definition
33

Communication is a mean
to exchange information

He should
understand me

I should
understand him

(Expressing part)

(Listening part)

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Communication facts
34

During communication you


do two things
Express yourself
Listen to somebody

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Types of Communications
35

Types of
Communications

Verbal

Gestures

Hamdard University

Listening

Non-Verbal
Facial
expressions

Behaviors

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

36

Hamdard University

1- Skillful Listening

1- Skillful Listening
37

You need to understand others (by listening)


before being understood by other.
(Stephen Covey)

Listening involves
patience, openness, and
desire to understand
Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

1- Skillful Listening
38

Listen carefully to your students' (co-worker)


question (or point).
After listening to some of my co-worker
for few minutes. I ask what is your point?

Let them finish.

Give them respect (leave your work).

Make sure you understand the question


correctly before answering it.
Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

1- Skillful Listening
39

Just giving the impression that you are


listening will not work.

People would enjoy talking to you if you


pay attention, you are involve in
conversation.

Example: You are hearing somebody, but


actually thinking about a cricket-match or
your important presentation with
customer tomorrow.
Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

1- Skillful Listening
40

Good listening is key to diagnose a problem.

Listening is tool to increase knowledge.

Ask good questions and take notes.

Repeat back to the other person what they just said


but in your own words.

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

1- Skillful Listening
41

Listening is starting point for open-mind dialogue.

Listen carefully with attention and


process information being fed into you mind;
only than you can have open-mind talks.

Example: Child say something that makes you angry


and you get upset and stop the discussion in a nonconclusive manner.
Will shouting on child resolve the problem?
You need to make child understand why it is wrong
Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

1- Skillful Listening
42

Good listener is attentive.


They make good eye contact
do not interrupt what the other person is saying
And show interest in what is communicated

Good listener does not check their phone, email or iPhone


in the middle of a conversation.

Good listener uses positive body language; leaning


forward showing an enthusiastic and relaxed nature.

Good listener does not hurry.


Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

1- Skillful Listening True Story


43
Stephen Coveys book 7-Habbits

A father was in train and his three sons were playing in the train
making lots of noise. Father was sitting and not stopping them.
Another man stood and reached to the father and said
What kind of person you are?
Not telling your kids to be quite?
Your kids are disturbing everybody in the train.
Father looked at him and said we are coming from funeral
of my wife and their mother. We are going home. I do not
want them to be sad remember their mother as I am now.
Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

44

Hamdard University

2- Express yourself

2- Express yourself
45

Normally three styles of communications

Passive Communication
Agressive Communication
Assertive Communication

Hamdard University

(balance)

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

2- Express yourself
46

Express part

expression is multidimensional
It is combinations of a few things
o
o
o
o

Words (contents)
Voice (tone, pitch)
Style (boring, engage audience)
Body language (confident, relax)

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

2- Express yourself
47

Do you know that . .

your body language and

your tone speaks louder

than your words ?

Words
Tone/pitch

Body Language

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

2- Express yourself
48

Do you know that . .

your body language and

your tone speaks louder

than your words ?

7-8 %

Words
35-38 %
Tone/pitch
50-55 %
Body Language

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

2-Express yourself
49

1- Words (contents) = 7- 8 %
Words are only labels and the listeners put their
own interpretation on speakers words.

He is bad, He is not good


have different meaning
You are lying (rudely)
You are not telling truth (smiling)
Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

2-Express yourself
50

2- Paralinguistic = 35-38%
The way in which something is said
the accent
tone and
voice modulation

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

2-Express yourself
51

3- Body language = 50-55%


What a speaker looks like while delivering a
message affects the listeners understanding
most.
Your Confidence
Defensive
Lying

Dressing

Gestures

Hamdard University

Non-Verbal
Facial
expressions

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Behaviors

52

Hamdard University

Impact of Emotions

Impact of Emotions
53

How many you considered


yourselves as short tempered ?

Do you know you can train your mind to control


emotions?

We trained our mind to control our anger when Boss


says something that offends us.

We cannot control anger when co-worker or student


say something offensive.
Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Impact of Emotions
54

You behave differently when you are emotionally charged

Playing a football match


you hit somebody ready to fight.

Your friend tried to stop you not one time


Friend struggle many time to clam you down
Normally you listen to your fiend
You were not emotionally normal
You did not behave normal
Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Impact of Emotions
55

You behave differently when you are emotionally charged

Somebody said a sentence


You took different meaning and become
emotionally charged
You react differently
Did not manage your emotions

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Impact of Emotions
56

You dont want to hurt or upset other


Daughter showed a bad drawing
Should be honest, but not direct
Convey the message do not hurt emotionally
Use sandwich approach

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Controlling your emotions


57

For practice must see the video of


Former Iranian President
Mahmoud AhmediNejad
Giving (18-min) interview to FOX News
24-Sep-2010

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Believe in yourself
58

You can do job only if you believe


that you can do that.

Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

Adopting these skills


59

Practice
. . and more practice
and more practice . .

until it become
your behavior
Hamdard University

By Asad Ur Rehman - Dept of Computing (HIET)

That is all

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