Social Lives of School Children

Chapter Eleven Discussion Questions

Vocabulary
follow-through enforcing of consequences following a warning and pause
habitual anti-social behaviour destructive behaviour carried out without thought
inhibiting consequences strategies that encourage/enhance self control. Use of constructive actions
aimed at helping children realize the impact of their behaviour on self and others
logical consequences consequences directly related to the rule violated. Their goal is to help students
learn appropriate behaviours or repair damages through three actions
rehearsal practice of appropriate action:
restitution offer repair/amends for misbehaviour
temporary loss of abused privilege
natural consequences consequences that happen without intervention from adults (eg: refusing to
wear a jacket = feel cold)
punishment a consequence enforced by an adult that is not related to the problem behaviour. It
detracts from the acquisition of self-control and gains only temporary compliance. (eg: forbidding
television for not completing homework)
sitting apart temporary removal of a child from an activity or group because they are causing harm or
disruption but isn't engaged in a temper tantrum or habitual anti-social behaviour
temper tantrum intense emotional and physical response that overwhelms a child's normal though
processes
time-out removal of a child from a situation or activity for a brief period of time to help him/her
retain control of their emotions
unrelated consequences consequences manufactured by adults that is unrelated to the behavioural
offence. It is sometimes necessary when the natural consequence would be dangerous or harmful to a
child
attention seekers children who demand constant and undue attention
hopeless children children who have given up all prospects of gaining power/attention
power seekers children who exert power blatantly

Discussion Questions
1. List the various reasons why children misbehave and a related solution(s)
Reason for Misbehaviour

Solution to Misbehaviour

Children are unsure of the rules and how to follow Check that the rules are clear, age-appropriate and
them
provide guidance for alternate, acceptable
behaviours
Children can't figure out which actions to
substitute for unacceptable ones

Provide guidance for alternate, acceptable

behaviours

Adults have unreasonable expectations for

children's behaviour

Check that the rules are age and developmentally

appropriate

Children are acting on impulse (impulsivity

decreases with age)

Slow children down with physical interventions,

verbal strategies or a combination of both
Teach children self-instructional (self-talk)
strategies to inhibit impulses or temptation

Children have a mistaken perception about how to Recognize and acknowledge the misconceptions
gain status or power (power seeking children,
Help children learn alternate methods for
attention seeking children, and hopeless children) establishing self-worth
There are contradictory rules

Work with other elements of a child's mesosystem

to limit contradictions in expectations and rules
Explain to the child that different adults have
different expectations or standards for behavior

Children do not respect rules that they find silly or Explain the reasoning for rules
unnecessary
Involve children in discussions about the
problems that could arise if a rule is not following
and brainstorm possible solutions
Child receives mixed messages about a rule
(Caregiver fails to reward compliance/ignores
noncompliance)

Enforce a limited number of rules consistently

Child is testing the limits to determine where

boundaries occur and whether rules will be
enforced consistently

Enforce a limited number of rules consistently

2. Explain the mistaken perceptions that may prompt children's misbehaviour and describe
strategies to alter those perceptions.
Mistaken
Perceptio
n

Description

Disordered Beliefs

Solutions

Attentions Children that demand

Child believes their self-worth
seekers
constant undue attention is contingent on being noticed
by others

Ignore minor bids to gain

attention and wait for a child to
demonstrate more appropriate
actions before giving attentions
With more serious bids for
attention, reflect the child's
desire for attention and then
explain that it will not be given
until they demonstrate a more
desirable behaviour

Power
seekers

Give a child opportunities for

genuine power within the
classroom by offering choices,
allowing them to make
decisions and requesting their
participation in planning
lessons

Children who exert their Children often have no

power blatantly by using legitimate power over their
brunt force or
own lives
consistently resisting the
requests of others

Hopeless Children who have

children given up all prospects of
gaining power or
attention. They may act
withdrawn and helpless
or violent and vengeful

They feel rejected by others

and resort to aggressive
behaviour in an attempt to be
noticed or
withdrawing/helpless
behaviour as a way of lowering
expectations

Require nurturing relationships

with adults to correct their
feelings of worthlessness
Require opportunities to
experience genuine success
Do not do for a child what they
are capable of doing for
themselves (do not reinforce
the helpless cycle)

3. Discuss the similarities and differences between positive consequences, inhibiting

consequences and punishments
Positive Consequences

Inhibiting Consequences

-meant to reinforce behaviour by

-meant to reinforce or shape behaviour
offering a positive experience following
by providing a negative experience
proper behaviour (praise, personal
following a rule infraction
messages, showing positive results
-related to
of compliance, earned privilege and
behaviour
-addresses rule infractions
rewards
-follow
-immediately follow positive behaviour immediately
-attempt to
prevent problem
behaviour

-may take the form of

rehearsal, retribution
or temporary loss
of related privilege

-follow a rule
infraction

-doesn't educate a student about how to behave

-punishment is unrelated to rule infraction
-doesn't always follow concurrently (in time)
-temporarily causes a cessation of problem
behaviour (often returns)

Punishment

4. Positive, natural, logical and unrelated consequences for the following rules
Rule

Positive

Natural

Logical

Walk, don't run,

down the hall

I like how softly

you're walking
down the hall
Judy

Judy falls while

Have Judy
Judy misses recess
running in the hall rehearse walking for running in the
down the hall
hall
instead of running

Throw the ball,

don't kick it

I like how
carefully you're
throwing the ball
to Mary

The ball gets

broken

Judy practices
throwing the call
ten times to the
teacher

Unrelated

July had to write

lines about how
she will not throw
the ball in the
future

Only use your own I like that your

Judy gets lice from
gym towel
wrote your name sharing her towel
on your towel
with Mary
Judy, so that you'd
remember which
one was yours

Judy practices
Judy misses the
using her own
next three gym
gym towel by
classes
showing the
teacher she's
brought it with her

Handle the
computer
keyboard gently

I like how gentle Judy breaks the

you're being with computer
the keyboard
keyboard
Judy

Judy temporarily Judy misses recess

loses her computer for her behaviour
privileges
in computers

Wall on the
sidewalk, not in
the flower bed

You remembered
that the sidewalk
is for people to
walk on

Judy kills the

Judy needs to
flowers and the
replant the
owner of the house damaged plants
gets angry

Judy is given
detentions

Tell someone
when you need
help

The teacher points

out how many new
words Judy has
learned by asking
the teacher the
meaning of
unfamiliar ones
when reading

Judy fails her

spelling test
because she
doesn't understand
silent letters

Teacher
demonstrates
appropriate
methods for
asking for help at
circle time

Judy has to correct

her work during
lunch period

Call people by
their real names,
don't mock
people's names

You've worked
hard to learn how
to pronounce __'s
name Judy. I bet
he feels good to be
called by the right
name.

Judy get's kicked

by ___ on the
playground for
calling him by a
different name

Judy makes an
Judy is given a ten
apology card for
minute time-out
_____ (only a
logical
consequence if she
is genuinely
contrite)

5. Discuss the importance of following through on consequences as well as the results of not doing
so.
Children naturally want to test boundaries in order to derive a sense of security about the consistency
and reliability of their caregivers. Caregivers who inconsistently apply consequences make children
feel insecure in their setting. These children are more likely to ignore rules or consistently test and
retest in an attempt to establish wavering boundaries. If rules are applied inconsistently, children are
also less likely to understand the connections between their behaviours and consequences and,
therefore, will be slower to attain higher levels of self-control. Finally, children who experience
inconsistent rule enforcement (or long delays between rule infractions and enforcement) are more
likely to view their caregivers as vengeful.
6. Referring to the NAEYC Code of Ethical Conduct in Appendix A, identify the principles or
ideals that will help you determine an ethical course of action in the following situations:
Summary

NAEYC Principles

Ethical Course of Action

A parent is walking with her

child to the car. Suddenly the
child dashes away from her into
the busy parking lot. The parent,
obviously frightened, grabs the
child and smacks her three times
saying, You scared the life out
of me. Never do that again.
You are getting out of your car
and witness the interaction.

When we have reasonable cause

to suspect child abuse or neglect,
we shall report it to the
appropriate community agency
and follow up to ensure that
appropriate action has been
taken.

I would consider the context of

the situation and my former
dealings with that family and
child. If it appeared to be an
isolated incident then I would
confidentially discuss the
situation with the parent, offer
them some resources for
effective and non-punitive
discipline strategies and keep a
close record for any signs of
future incidents.
If I felt it was a regular pattern of
behaviour, or the child
demonstrated characteristics of
being abused I would report it.

You notice a colleague in the

hallway arguing with her own
child (4 years old) who is
enrolled in the program. The
child is screaming and trying to
pull away as the adult escorts
him toward the door. Suddenly
the adult turns the child around
and gives him two swats on the
bottom. You and several
children from your class see the
incident.

P-3A.2 When we have

concerns about the professional
behaviour of a co-worker, we
shall first let that person know of
our concern in a way that shows
respect for personal dignity and
for the diversity to be found
among staff members, and then
attempt to resolve the matter
collegialy and in a confidential
manner.
P-3B.4 if we have concerns
about a colleague's behaviour,
and [a child] is at risk or the
situation doesn't improve after it

I would discuss the colleague's

behaviour with her first and then,
if they continued in such
behaviour, speak to a supervisor.
I would want to the colleague to
include some discussion about
making a mistake with my
students as a form of reparation.

has been brought to the

colleague's attention, we shall
report the colleague's unethical
or incompetent behaviour tot he
appropriate authority
A large group of third graders are
playing T-ball on the playground.
Another adult comes to you and
says, I have to go in now. I told
Jeff he couldn't play T-ball any
more today because of his
fighting. Please make sure he
doesn't play T-ball. The adult
goes inside. There are 30
minutes left to play. A few
minutes later Jeff, who has been
watching from the sidelines, is
called into the game by his
friends. He looks to you and
says, I've learned my lesson.
Can't I play?

P-3A.1 We shall recognize the

contributions of colleagues to
our program and not participate
in practices that diminish their
reputations or impair their
effectiveness in working with
children and families

Enforce the consequence that has

been laid out. If you disagree
with the severity or nature of the
consequence then it's your
ethical responsibility to discuss
that privately with your
colleague rather than publicly
disavowing it or allowing for
inconsistency. (obviously there
would be exception it it were an
unethical punishment)

7. How would you respond to another helping professional who said: the skill sequence takes
too long. Besides, children can't respond to so much talking. Just tell them what's not allowed and be
done with it.
Skill Sequence personal message
teacher uses proximity (comes close to the child) and using their name, reminds them of
the rule being broken
-pause
teacher uses a pause to see if the child will alter their behaviour
-warning
teacher tells the child what the consequence will be if they fail to alter their behaviour
-pause
child is given the opportunity to digest and comply
-follow-through
teacher immediately follows through on promised consequence
The use of the skill sequence is important for a teacher to be consistent in their dealings of rule
infractions. It provides them with a script to follow in all situations. This is particularly useful when a
teacher is emotionally charged (angry, disappointed) by the situation. The script provides the child
with the information they need (and does not bog them down with unnecessary information).
A child is better able to develop self-management of their behaviour because it treats the child with
respect and he/she is given the opportunity to comply at each stage of the process. It provides clear
differentiation between the behaviour and child. While a child will typically test boundaries when the

sequence is first introduced, they will quickly learn to comply at the earliest stages of the sequence.
Through this process they move from being externally controlled (by the teacher) to being internally
regulating with the assistance of behaviour cues.
9/10. - What is the process of time-outs, when should they be used and when should they not be
used?
A time-out is a short-term removal of a child from a highly charged situation in order to help them calm
down. It should not be used except in when the child is engaged in a temper tantrum or habituation
anti-social behaviours. A time-out should be conducted in a place that is safe, with minimal
distractions and a supervising adult. A time out should never be extended beyond the time that it takes
for a child to calm down. A time-out is not intended to be used as a punishment, but as an opportunity
for a child to disengage from an upsetting situation and recover control over their emotions. In this
way, children who recognize their own emotions spiralling and chose to take a time out ought to be
praised and encouraged for doing so.
Time-out should not be used to humiliate, punish, threaten or as an alternative for instructing
alternatives for problem behaviours. Children who are disturbing or harming others may be expected
to sit apart from her/his peers but this should be considered separate from a time-out. A time-out
should only be used for intense emotional fits.