Consider this statement:

Businesses succeed by taking advantage of consumers weaknesses.

Write a unified essay in which you perform the following tasks. Explain what you think the above
statement means. Describe a specific situation in which businesses succeed without taking advantage
of the consumers weaknesses. Discuss what you think determines whether or not businesses take
advantage of consumers weaknesses in order to succeed.
Sample Essay #1
Todays society is marked by the endeavors free market participants. Driven by profit
and the allure of the American Dream, many businesses seem obsessed with success
even at the expense of fairness to the consumers. Many employ advertising tactics that
appeal to deficiency in ones character that cause a sense of need for the product.
Need is then, the power behind the purchase. Consider the countless improvements,
recreations and innovations that spring up every year as cosmetics. The trick to selling
is to then to get the consumer to believe that he/she needs the cosmetics. This is
achieved through promoting an ideal of beauty that leads the weak mind to the
conclusion that it is necessary to achieve this standard.
Some business, however, have the interest of the consumer at heart, not wishing to
exploit them.
SCORE = 1
Explanation of score:
This essay never gets beyond its introductory paragraph, so despite some hint of ideas and a brief
example, there is simply too little here to justify a score higher than a 1. The cosmetics example has
potential, but the essay does not attend to the rhetorical assignment by providing a Task 2
counterargument and discussing the basic tensions raised by the writing prompt. The essay also
exhibits some carelessness with phrasing and sentence structure that hampers a clear communication
of meaning throughout the brief response.
Sample Essay #2
Successful businesses effectively identify the vulnerabilities of their consumers and
provide goods and services to remedy these weaknesses. In todays American society,
such business tactics are exemplified in the success and popularity of fast-food. Both
fast-food restaurant chains and grocery-brand pre-made frozen meals profit by
attracting consumers who desire quick, easy, and tasty meals and who lack the time,
energy, and interest to cook for themselves. This trend implies that businesses unfairly
deceive and take advantage of their consumers.

However, many businesses succeed by effectively identifying the needs of consumers

and providing quality and valuable services to its consumers. For example, restaurants
need to maintain the utmost sanitary conditions, friendly service, quality food, and
enjoyable atmosphere in order to continue attracting customers. Also, competition with
other restaurants drives restaurants to strive to enhance their business. Thus
competition provides an internal check within the restaurant business to ensure
customers enjoy their dining experience for reasonable prices.
Comparing the fast-food market with dine-in restaurants illustrates the difference
between businesss taking advantage of consumers. In the fast-food market these
businesses take advantage that their consumers need quick, relatively cheap food.
Whereas in the restaurant market, consumers frequent restaurants not because of
time constraints, but because of their desire to enjoy an out of home dining experience
for pleasure. Therefore, a business may succeed without taking advantage of its
consumers when consumers exercise regulation by their choices within a competitive
market and demand quality services and goods from these businesses.
SCORE = 3
Explanation of score:
While this essay addresses all three tasks, inconsistent focus and muddled reasoning keep it squarely
at the 3 score point. The first paragraphs example of the fast-food industry has potential, but the
writer never manages a convincing argument as to how providing time-strapped consumers with
ready-to-eat meals constitutes taking unfair advantage of them. This inability to clearly explain the
significance of an example is typical of many papers at the 3 score point. It undercuts the continuity of
the argument and leaves it only somewhat developed.
The writers gaps in reasoning are most obvious in the second paragraph. The distinctions between
fast-food and dine-in restaurants arent readily apparent, and the relationship between maintaining
sanitary conditions and not taking advantage of a consumer is never clearly stated. The mention of
competition within the restaurant business seems disconnected from the rest of the paragraph (and
irrelevant to the prompt), and exemplifies this essays wandering focus.
The final paragraph does more explicitly connect the fast-food and dine-in restaurant examples, but
the discussion is still less than satisfying. The conclusion seems to turn on the perplexing assertion
that the fast-food industry is not competitive. This writer has a facility with language and commits few
errors at the mechanical level, but this isnt enough to overcome the fundamental weaknesses of the
argument and its execution.
Sample Essay #3
It is said that businesses succeed by taking advantage of consumers weaknesses. The
success of a product generated by a business is often a result of the marriage between

a need for that product and the business ability to portray its product as filling that
need. Both the need and the portrayal are often hard to distinguish. The portrayal or
advertisement can create a need that the consumer had previously been unaware of.
The weakness of the consumer is therefore often in the consumers inability to deny
their visceral reactions to an advertisement or in the consumers inability to deny the
pleas of others in their household who are too weak to overcome the lure of the
advertisement. A classic example of this can be seen in the annual riots that are found
in toystores every Christmas. Millions upon millions of Americans storm the stores,
fight amongst themselves, or pay exorbitant prices for the right own a Cabbage Patch
Doll or Tickle Me Elmo. Those products are not the result of an actual need by the
consumer, perse, but rather their weakness in not being able to either fend off their
childs desire to own the toy, or fend off the perception that buying such toys confers
some sense of status or class.
Yet, it would be rash to say that all products of a business are successful, strictly
because of the marketing. Some products find their success in their inherent quality
and functionality. For instance, the Dell Coporation is a hugely successful business
whose success can be attributed to its long-standing reputation for building quality
custome-made computers and providing exceptional technical service. In its recent
years, Dell has introduced a diverse and comprehensive marketing campaign. Yet, Dells
success and reputation in the Computer Industry existed far before this campaign ever
hit the streets. In this instance, Dells success was not due to the consumers inability
or weakness to keep themselves from buying a computer, but rather the intrinsic
quality of the product that Dell produced.
It is certainly true that any business greatly benefits from a well-planned, wellexecuted marketing campaign. In this sense, consumer weakness can be seen to play a
very large role in the success of a business. Yet, for the most part, a product that is in
and of itself an excellent product can attribute its success primarily to its own quality
rather than a weakness to strong marketing. Just as a product with little inherent value
can be sold successfully despite the absence of an actual need, so, too, can a product of
high quality be sold despite the absence of marketing and consumer weakness.
Understanding these two components can greatly enhance the success of just about any
business. A business has a greater chance of success when this union is brought to life.
SCORE = 6
Explanation of score:
This essay addresses all three rhetorical tasks with clarity and depth. The opening paragraph, which

explores the tendency of companies to create needs for otherwise unnecessary goods, is the essays
strongest section. Some of the complexity of the prompt topic emerges in the essays exploration of
the subtle interplay between actual need and the portrayal of need, and in its extension of the idea of
consumer weakness to include the difficulty consumers face in saying no to the pleas of others in
their household.
The second paragraphs discussion of the success of Dell Computers in Task 2 is not particularly
nuanced, but nonetheless supplies an effective discussion of a well chosen counterexample. The writer
then brings together the specific points made in the first two paragraphs to provide an insightful
generalization about product marketing in the concluding paragraph, successfully addressing Task 3.
Language use throughout is clear, effective, and precise. Overall, the essay is thoughtful, unified,
focused, and coherent. In its consistency and thoughtfulness, it earns a score of 6.

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