Anger

Anger is a God given emotion in response to a real or perceived injustice. Anger itself
is not right or wrong. It is an emotion to be dealt with. It is in how the anger is handled
that becomes right or wrong.
And "don't sin by letting anger gain control over you.
Don't let the sun go down while you are still angry,
for anger gives a mighty foothold to the Devil.
(Ephesians 4:26-27 NLT)

Reasons why people get angry

Harsh Words

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but harsh words stir up

anger. (Proverbs 15:1 NLT)

Betrayal, Rejection

A troublemaker plants seeds of strife; gossip separates the

best of friends. (Proverbs 16:28 NLT)

Quarrels, Frustrations Beginning a quarrel is like opening a floodgate, so drop the

matter before a dispute breaks out. (Proverbs 17:14 NLT)
Learned Anger

Keep away from angry, short-tempered people, or you will

learn to be like them and endanger your soul.
(Proverbs 22:24-25 NLT)

How to deal with anger

Diffuse theirs. If your partner is angry, you may be able to help diffuse their anger.
How do you do that?
First, by remaining calm yourself.
A gentle answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger.
(Proverbs 15:1 NAS)
Second, by not provoking anger. Do not use harsh words, do not indicate betrayal or
rejection, do not continue a quarrel or cause your partner to become frustrated. In
short, do not do anything to make your partner more angry.

Control yours. You can recognize when you are getting angry. When you do it is your
responsibility to calm yourself.

Those who control their anger have great understanding;

those with a hasty temper will make mistakes.
(Proverbs 14:29 NLT)
The godly think before speaking; the wicked spout evil words.
(Proverbs 15:28 NLT)
People with good sense restrain their anger;
they earn esteem by overlooking wrongs.
(Proverbs 19:11 NLT)
My dear brothers and sisters, be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get
angry. Your anger can never make things right in God's sight.
(James 1:19-20 NLT)

Replace it. Replace anger with the fruit of the Spirit. You cannot manifest anger and
the fruit of the spirit at the same time. Ask God to help you have the fruit of the Spirit
instead of anger.
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness,
faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.
(Galatians 5:22-24 NAS)
Replace anger with love and kindness.
Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. Love
does not demand its own way. Love is not irritable, and it keeps no record of
when it has been wronged. It is never glad about injustice but rejoices whenever
the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and
endures through every circumstance.
(1 Corinthians 13:4-7 NLT)
Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander,
as well as all types of malicious behavior. Instead, be kind to each other,
tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as
God through Christ has forgiven you.
(Ephesians 4:31-32 NLT)

Redirect it. When there is conflict in your marriage recognize that you have an enemy
but it is not your spouse. It is the devil.
Be careful! Watch out for attacks from the Devil, your great enemy. He prowls
around like a roaring lion, looking for some victim to devour.
(1 Peter 5:8 NLT)

He is the one trying to destroy your marriage.

Knowing that the devil is your enemy does mean that you continue to allow him to beat
you up.
Behold, I give you the authority to trample on serpents and scorpions, and over
all the power of the enemy, and nothing shall by any means hurt you.
(Luke 10:19 NKJV)
Rather than turning against one another, link up arm in arm, side by side and direct your
anger where it belongs, toward your real enemy, the devil. Fight him through prayer
and by dealing with anger and issues in a proper way.
Anger in marriage is often an anger of hope. By getting angry with you, I hope you will
change. It never works.
Remember . . .
And "don't sin by letting anger gain control over you.
Don't let the sun go down while you are still angry,
for anger gives a mighty foothold to the Devil.
(Ephesians 4:26-27 NLT)
This you know, my beloved brethren. But everyone must be quick to hear,
slow to speak and slow to anger; for the anger of man does not achieve
the righteousness of God.
(James 1:19-20 NASU)