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Introduction
.3
Why do we
communicate?.........................................................................3
Effective
Communication
3
Basic Principles of
Communications4
The Process of
Communications4
Source
5
Encoding
..5
Channel
.6
Decoding
..6
Empathic Listening
..6
7 Cs of
Communication
.7
Completeness
7
Conciseness
7
Consideration
8
1
Concreteness
8
Clarity
.8
Courtesy
8
Correctness
.8
Components of
Communication.9
Sending Verbal
Messages.9
Para-verbal
Messages.9
Non-verbal
Messages10
Kinds of Body
Language.
10
Paralinguistic
..10
Kinesics
10
Proxemics
..10
Haptics
.11
Chronemics
..11
Oculesics
.11
2
Posture
.11
Appearance
..11
Facial
Expressions
11
Gestures
.12
Eye
Contact
..12
Consistency
..12
Causes of Communication
Difficulties12
Barriers of Effective
Communication..13
As
Speaker
..13
As
Listener
..13
Communication Failure Can
Cause13
Seven Principles of Cooperative
Communication13
Seven Poor Communication
Skills..14
Communication
Style..
14
Aggressive
.14
Passive
.14
Assertive
.14
Verbally Assertive
People15
Non-verbal Assertive
People.15
How to Manage Your Body
Language?........................................................15
Active
Listening
15
Key to Active
Listening.15
Active Listening
Skills.16
Benefits of Active
Listening..17
Bad Habits of Poor
Listening.17
Good Habits of Effective
Listening17
Gathering Good Information with Your
Ears17
Listen
.18
To Improve Your
Communication.1
8
Speaking
..18
Listening
..18
Writing
..18
4
Behavioural
18
General
.19
Effective Communication
Introduction
Communication is the exchange of thoughts, messages or information, as by
speech, visuals, signals, writing or behavior. Everything we do is
communication. When we are talking, listening, watching, we are
communicating. The way we sit, stand, our facial expressions and the
gestures we make are all part of communication. The purpose of
communication is to get our message across to others clearly and
unambiguously. Doing this, involves effort from both the sender of the
message and the receiver. And its a process that can be fraught with errors,
with messages often misinterpreted by the recipient. When it isnt detected,
it can cause tremendous confusion, wasted efforts, and missed opportunity.
Why do we communicate?
Get information
Motivated
Cheat
Praised
Make arrangements
Give advice
Sell
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Greet
Abuse
Etc.
Effective Communication
When the sender of the message and the receiver, understand the same
information, as a result of the communication is called effective
communication.
Effective communication leads to productive relationship. As has been
already said that effective communication ensures that your message has
been correctly understood by the recipient and appropriate action, if
necessary, has been taken. There has been no loss of time, effort or
opportunity. When the messages are conveyed in the best manner by the
sender and received in the best way by the recipient, and appropriate action
promptly taken, breeds a healthy and productive relationship.
Whatever we communicate, whenever we communicate, is based upon our
values, beliefs, self esteem, self image and our thoughts. Somebody said,
Sow a thought, reap an action:
Sow an action, reap a habit:
Sow a habit, reap a character:
Sow a character, reap a destiny.
Today we are where our thoughts have taken us.
Our values, beliefs and our thoughts determine what we say or do. The
words that we utter, and the way we utter, has certain amount of influence
on the result of our communication. Occasionally these results may effect
our beliefs and values
3. The way the message is delivered always effect the way message is
received.
4. The real communication is the message received, not the intended.
5. Communication is a two way streetwe have to give as well as
gathering.
6. We cannot NOT communicate.
Whenever you communicate with someone else, you and the other person
follow the steps of communication process as shown. Here, the person who is
the source, or sender, of the communication, encodes his message, and
transmits it through a channel. The channel may be verbal, written, a
diagram or a sketch, a gesture or even through the looks. The receiver
decodes the message, and in one way or the other, feeds back
understanding or lack of understanding to the source. During this process of
communication you may encounter noises or barriers which may in turn
influence the effectiveness of communication. By understanding the steps in
this process, you may become more aware of your role in it, recognize what
you need to do to communicate effectively, anticipate problems before they
happen and improve your overall ability to communicate effectively.
The Source
Confidence level
Defensiveness
Agreement
Comprehension (or lack of understanding)
Level of interest
Truthfulness (or lying/dishonesty)
Encoding
Create a clear, well crafted message. You need to consider not only what you
want to say, but also how your recipient will perceive it. Choose words and
body language that allows the other person to really hear what you are
saying.
With written communication make sure that what you write will be perceived
the way you intend. Words on a page generally have no emotionsthey do
not smile or frown. When writing, take your time to think. Review your
style; avoid jargons and slangs. Check your attitude, nuance and
subtleties. Use the principle of KISS.
Another important consideration is to use pictures, charts and diagrams,
wherever possible. Because, a picture speaks thousand words.
Channel
Along with encoding the message, you need to choose the best
communication channel. You want to be efficient, and yet make the most of
your communication opportunity. Using email to send simple directions is
practical. However if you want to delegate a complex task, an email is
probably just lead to more questions, so it may be best to arrange a time to
speak in person. And if you communication has any negative emotional
content, stay well away from email. Make sure that you communicate face to
face or by phone, so that you can judge the impact of your words and adjust
them appropriately. When you are determining the best way to send
message, consider the following:
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Decoding:
It can be easy to focus on speaking, however, to be a good communicator,
you also need to step back, let the other person talk, and just listen.
Listening is hard work, which is why effective listening is called Active
Listening. To listen actively, give your undivided attention to the speaker.
Look at the person, pay attention to his/her body language, because body
language reveals whether the person speaking is honest to what he is
saying. Avoid distractionbecause distraction sometimes discourages the
speaker to give out details, which might be helpful for you to understand and
analyze the message. Nod and smile encourages the speaker as they ensure
the speaker of your attentiveness.
Empathic listening
Empathic listening helps you to decode a message accurately. To understand
the message fully, you have to understand the emotions and underlying
feelings the speaker is expressing. This is where the understanding of body
language can be useful. As a speaker, understanding your listeners body
language can give you an opportunity to adjust your message and make it
more understandable, appealing and interesting. As a listener, body
language can show you more about what the other person is saying.
7 Cs of communication:
Think of how often you communicate with people during the day. You write emails, facilitate meetings, participate in conference calls, create reports, and
devise presentations, debate with your colleagues the list goes on. We can
spend our entire day in communicating. So how can we provide a huge boost
to our productivity? We can make sure that we can communicate in the
clearest, most effective way possible. This is why 7 Cs of communication are
helpful. This is applicable to both written as well as verbal.
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Completeness
Conciseness
Consideration
Concreteness
Clarity
Courtesy
Correctness
Completeness:
The communication must be complete.
It should convey all the facts required by the audience. The sender of the
message must take into consideration the receivers mindset.
A complete message has the following features:
A complete communication always gives additional information whenever
required. It leaves no question in the mind of receiver.
Helps in better decision-making; as the message has all the desired and
crucial information.
It includes call for action so that your audience knows what you want them
to do. It contains all relevant contact names, dates, time and location, etc.
It persuades the audience. Its cost-saving
Develops and enhances the reputation of an organization
Conciseness:
Means wordiness i.e., communicating what you want to convey in least
possible words without forgoing the other Cs of communication. Words like,
I mean, you see, kind of , basically should be avoided. Check, are
there unnecessary sentences. Have you repeated your view point several
times? It is both time-saving and cost-saving. They are more appealing and
comprehensible to the audience. Concise messages are non-repetitive in
nature.
Consideration:
Consideration implies stepping into the shoes of others. Effective
communication must take into consideration the audiences view point,
background, interest, educational qualification level, etc. Make an attempt to
envisage your audience, their requirements, emotions, as well as their
problems. Ensure that the self-respect of the audience is maintained and
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their emotions are not at harm. Modify your words in message to suit
audiences needs while making your message complete.
Concreteness:
It implies being particular and clear rather than fuzzy and general. Concrete
strengthens the confidence. It is supported by facts and figures. Concrete
messages are not misinterpreted, as they are vivid and well focused.
Clarity:
Clarity implies emphasizing on a specific message or a goal at a time rather
than trying to achieve too much at once. Write your purpose clearly.
Complete clarity of thoughts and ideas enhance the meaning of message
It makes understanding easier
Clear message make use of exact, appropriate and concrete words
Have you used familiar words, short sentences?
Have you presented one idea in each sentence?
Have you avoided jargons and slangs?
Have you used the readers language?
Courtesy:
Courteous message shows the senders expression as well as respect to the
receiver, as it is friendly, open and honest, and therefore boosts confidence
level. The sender of the message should be sincerely polite, judicious,
reflective and enthusiastic. Courteous message is positive and focused at the
audience. It is not at all biased. There are no hidden insults or aggressive
tones.
Correctness:
The message is exact, correct and well-timed. A correct message has greater
impact on the audience/reader. It checks for the precision and accuracy of
facts and figures used in the message. It makes use of appropriate and
correct language. Its a check on the appearance of the letter, whether it is
clean and well spaced.
Components of Communication
On daily basis we work with people who have different opinions, values,
beliefs, and needs other than our own. Our ability to exchange ideas with
others, understand others perspective, solve problems successfully,
depends significantly upon how effectively we are able to communicate with
others.
The act of communication involves three components,
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verbal,
non-verbal and
paraverbal components.
The verbal component refers to the content of our message, the choice and
arrangement of our words. The non-verbal component refers to the message
we send through our body language. The paraverbal component refers to
how we say what we saythe tone, pacing and volume of our voice.
In order to communicate effectively we must use all three components to do:
Send clear and concise message
Hear and correctly understand message someone is sending us.
Paraverbal messages.
Paraverbal communication refers to the messages that we transmit through
the tone, pitch, and pacing or our voice. It is how we say something, not
what we say. Professor Mehrabian in his book, The Silent Messages, states
that the paraverbal messages accounts for approximately 38% of what is
communicated to someone. A sentence conveys entirely different meanings
depending upon the emphasis on words and the tone of voice. For example
I did not SAY you were stupid
I did not say YOU were stupid
I did not say you were STUPID
When we are angry or excited, our speech tends to become rapid and higher
pitched. When we are bored or feeling down, our speech tends to slow and
take a monotone quality.
Non-verbal Communication
The power of non-verbal communication can not be under-estimated. What
we are, communicates far eloquently than anything we say or do. Professor
Albert Mehrabian, says that messages we send through our posture, gestures
and facial expressions, and spatial distance account for 55% of what is
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perceived and understood by others. In fact, through our body we are always
communicating, whether we want it or not.
The difference between the words people speak and our understanding what
they are saying comes from non-verbal communication, otherwise called
body language. By developing your awareness of the signs and signals of
body language, you can more easily understand people, and more effectively
communicate with them. The way we talk, walk, sit and stand, all say
something about us, and whatever is happening on the inside can be
reflected on the outside. There are times when we send mixed messages- we
say one thing yet our body language reveals something different.
Non-verbal communication can be done through:
Facial expression
Eye movement
Head movement
Hand movement
Posture
Way of talking
Closeness
Body contact
Proxemics:
Related to space and distance.
Intimate distance.0 to 18 inches
Personal distance.18 inches to 4 feet
Social distance4 feet to 12 feet
Public distance..12 feet to the limit of sight
Haptics: Includes:
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Handshake
A pat on the shoulder
Holding hand
A pat on the back
Facial expressions:
You have eighty muscles in the face that can create more than 7000 facial
expressions. These muscles produce the varying facial expressions that
convey information about emotion, mood and ideas. There are six basic
facial expressions as given below:
Happiness: Whoever is happy will make others happy
Sadness: Sadness dulls the heart more than the grossest since
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Gestures:
Openness and confidence:
Open hands
Eye contact
Smile
Leaning forward
Relaxed
Standing straight
Indifference:
Legs crossed
Shaking one foot
Glancing at exit
Fidgeting
Eye Contact:
It is said that eyes are the windows to the mind. Eye alone tell you lot about
how a person is feeling. When someone is excited, his pupils dilate to four
times the normal size. An angry or negative mood causes the pupils to
contract. Good eye contact helps the audience develop the interest in the
speaker. It helps regulate the flow of communication and reflects interest in
others. Direct eye-contact conveys interest, warmth, credibility, and concern.
Shifty eyes suggest dishonesty and downward gaze shows submissiveness
and inferiority.
Consistency:
In all of our communication we must try to send consistent verbal, non-verbal
and para-verbal message. Consistency means our words, our gestures, facial
expression and our posture should convey the same message to the listener.
When a person sends a message with conflicting verbal, non-verbal and
para-verbal information, the non-verbal information tends to be believed.
Consider an example of someone, through a clenched jaw, hard eyes, and
steely voice, telling you he is not mad. Which are you likely to believe? What
you see or what you hear?
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
Not listening
Not understanding fully and fail to ask questions
Mind made up, preconceived ideas
Not understanding others needs
Not thinking clearly, jumping to conclusions
Bad mood
Failure to explore alternatives
Language
Wordiness
Semantics
Emotions
Inflection
Listener:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
Perceptions
Pre-conceived notion/expectations
Physical hearing problems
Speed of thought
Emotions
Not listening actively
Instead of We are out of paper say, I will pop down the shop for
some paper
3. Turn cants into cans
Instead of We cant do that until next week say, We will be able to do
that next week
4. Take responsibility--- dont lay blame
Instead of, its only my fault say, Heres what I can do to fix it
. Say what you want, not what you dont want
Instead of Dont drive too fast say, Drive carefully
6. Focus on future, not the past.
Instead of I have told you before not to. say, From now on.
7. Share information, rather than argue or accuse
Instead of No, you are wrong say, I see it like this.
7 POOR COMMUNICATION SKILLS
Communication styles.
Aggressive,
Passive and
Assertive
Aggressive:
Passive:
Assertive:
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Make statements that are honest, clear, brief, and to the point
Use I statement: I would like, I appreciate, I think, etc
Distinguish between facts and opinion
Ask, dont tell
Offer improvement suggestions, not advice and commands
Sit or stand at right angles and on the same level, and respect peoples
space zones
Use open gestures and body language
Centre your attention exclusively on the other person
Lean slightly forward to show interest, a bit further forward to apply
pressure, slightly back to reduce pressure
Manage appropriate eye contact while listening to encourage the
speaker: increase eye contact to apply pressure; reduce it to lower it
Respond appropriately by basing your responses on what the other
person has just said
Be relaxed and balanced to make relaxed and open communication
easier
ACTIVE LISTENING
The key to receiving messages effectively is listening. Listening requires
more than hearing words. Listening is combination of hearing what the
person says and psychological involvement with him also. It requires a desire
to understand another human being, and attitude of respect and acceptance,
and willingness to open ones mind to try and see things from anothers point
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of view. People dont care how much you know, but they know how much
care----by the way you listen.
Listening requires a high level of concentration and energy. It demands that
we set aside our own thoughts and agendas, put ourselves in anothers
persons eyes. True listening requires that we suspend judgment, evaluation
and approval in an attempt to understand in his frame of reference,
emotions, and attitude. Listening to understand is indeed a difficult task.
Some people worry that if they listen attentively and patiently to another
person who is saying something they disagree with, they are inadvertently
sending a message of agreement.
When we listen effectively we gain information that is valuable to understand
the problem as the person sees it. When we have a deeper understanding of
anothers perception, we agree with it or not, we hold the key to
understanding the persons motivation, attitude and behavior.
Learning to be effective listener is difficult task for many people. However
the specific skills for effective listening behavior can be learned.
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1. Postures and gestures: Our body posture can create a feeling of warm
openness or cold rejection. For example, when somebody faces us,
sitting quietly with hands loosely folded in the lap, a feeling of
anticipation and interest is created. A posture of arms crossed on the
chest portrays a feeling of inflexibility. The action gathering up ones
belonging signals a desire to end the conversation.
2. Giving full attention to the Speaker: Effective attending is a careful
balance of alertness and relaxation that includes appropriate body
movement, eye contact, and posture of involvement.
3. Beware of speakers non-verbal message. When we pay attention to
speakers body language, we gain insight into how that person is
feeling as well as the intensity of the feeling. Through careful attention
to the body language and paraverbal messages, we are able to
develop hunches about what the speaker (or listener) is
communicating. We can, then through our reflective listening skills,
check the accuracy of those hunches by expressing in our own words,
our impression of what is being communicated.
4. Pay attention to words and feelings: In order to understand the total
meaning of the message we must be able to gain understanding about
both the feeling and content of the message. Use reflecting listening
tools, such as paraphrasing, summarizing, and questioning, to increase
understanding the message that helps the speaker tell his story.
5. Paraphrasing: This is a concise statement of the contents of the
speakers message. A paraphrasing should be brief, succinct and focus
on the facts or ideas of the message rather than the feelings. The
paraphrase should be in listeners own words rather than parroting
back using speakers words.
Benefits of active listening
1. It focus people to listen attentively to others
2. It avoids misunderstanding, so people have to confirm that they do
really understand what another person has said
3. It tends to open people up, to get them to say more
Bad
Ask questions
Giving speaker time to articulate their thoughts
Letting people finish what they are saying before giving their opinion
Remaining poised, calm, and emotionally controlled
Looking alert and interested
Responding with nods and uh-uhms
LISTEN
L:
I:
S:
T:
E:
N:
Listening:
Be prepared to listen
Focus on speaker
Screen out distractions
Concentrate on the message
Accept accents
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Ask questions
Writing:
Write a purpose statement
Outline
Keep simple
Be concise
Support statement with details
Watch semantics
Quote authorities
Behavioral:
Intend to improve
Be flexible
Be likeable, use good manners
Dress appropriately
Smile Shake hands properly
Eliminate negative feelings
Be receptive to new ideas
Respect others point of view
Handle disagreement with tact
General:
Make eye contact
Use gestures
Use humour
Anecdotes and short stories
Ask for feedback
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