Sibling Rivalry

Daniel Hayes
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Simply Listening
What memories, hysteria and works of art have in common, Sarah
!ofman writes in The Childhood of Art, is that they are phantasmal
constr"ctions from memory traces, and have a plastic or theatrical
form# $nd these reworkings, these phantasmal constr"ctions, are akin
to that protracted "nconscio"s free%floating attention that &re"d
prescribed for the analyst# Which the analyst does from o"tside, the
dreamer and the artist do from inside' a s"stained, forgetf"l self%
listening(#)t is almost as tho"gh &re"d is saying that the dreamer and
the artist *and the ordinary rememberer+ already have something like an
analyst inside them, simply listening#
$dam ,hillips, -&re"d and the .ses of &orgetting/
1
)d been thinking abo"t the connection between psychoanalysis and my own
creative work
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, finding myself in a m"ddle, when ) reread ,hillipss article on forgetting#
1
$dam ,hillips, On Flirtation *1ambridge' Harvard .niversity ,ress, 1223+, p# 40#
0
$t least in the 5nglish lang"age, there seems no real alternative to speaking of creativity or creative work#
) dont like these terms, since they carry a slew of connotations that ) find s"spect6beginning with
specialness *e#g#, the so%called creative person+ and ending with benevolence *e#g#, -1reativity is good for
7he passage above describes something that ) was feeling b"t not 8"ite artic"lating, even
to myself# )t s"ggests6in a phrase s"ch as -a s"stained, forgetf"l self%listening/6the
hapha9ard process of writing fiction, and the interloc"tory nat"re of the a"thorial mind#
)n this conte:t, &re"ds rich notion of -free%floating attention/ makes me think of reverie,
a form of wakef"l dreaming, and how s"ch an emotional state can often lead yo" down a
path that yo" hadnt intended on taking# )n other words, the process of writing, at its
best, shares the defining element of the 8"intessential psychoanalytic session' s"rprise#
Writing, or any creative endeavor, is abo"t s"rprising yo"rself6and its remarkable,
really, how diffic"lt a feat that is# ,eople generally think of writers as single, knowing
psyches, doing the ard"o"s work of manip"lating words to have an effect on an a"dience
of "ns"specting readers# ;"t my sense of the writing process is different' the writer is
forever on the edge of solipsistic chatter, blessed with a mild form of schi9ophrenia#
7alking to yo"rself seems cra9y and circ"lar, b"t heres the difference' a writer m"st also
listen to himself# 7he implied relationship makes the creative process an interesting
psychoanalytic 8"andary#
Let me describe this relationship and my e:perience of it# ) sit down to write a
scene that involves a few pages of dialog between two principal characters# 7hey will
have a conversation, yes6b"t e:actly what will they say to each other< Strange 8"estion
to ask, since s"pposedly )m the one at the controls# ) want something to happen in the
scene, in the e:change of words6) know that m"ch= and lets ass"me for a moment that )
might be able to p"t my finger on what it is that ) want' if forced, ) co"ld prod"ce a
coherent answer to the 8"estion# ;"t ) dont ask that 8"estion# )nstead, ) set these
yo">/+# ;"t ) will "se the word, or its derivations, thro"gho"t6forgive me#
characters "p, like little wind%"p toys= and off they go, tending to say whatever they want
to say, and its never, ever what I either wanted them to say or thought that they might
say. $nd that e:perience of writing certainly r"ns co"nter to an idea, gained from my
own academic training, abo"t how a"thors write *and, in t"rn, abo"t how readers sho"ld
read+# Intention seems m"rky, at best= as a writer, my right hand is never 8"ite aware of
what my left is "p to# )n short, my characters s"rprise me# ?r ) s"rprise myself#
4
) began
with something6a kernel, an inartic"lated idea, a feeling, a glimpse of an emotional
circ"mstance6and somehow ) transform it, or ) e:perience firsthand *b"t from a slight
distance, almost as a third%party+ its transformation#
)f only it happened that easily> &or me, theres an obstacle to this feat of creativity
6this form of forgetting, this internal theater where ) play the roles of both actors and
a"dience6which co"ld be s"mmed "p in a co"ple of words' selfconsciousness and
interpretation. 7he first is a more collo8"ial term' everyone knows what it feels like to
be self%conscio"s and can also imagine how being self%conscio"s might stop the creative
process in its tracks#
3
7he latter term, interpretation, has a somewhat simple meaning in
literary criticism, b"t )m "sing it here in its psychoanalytic meaning# $nd we co"ld
describe the last half%cent"ry of psychoanalytic theory *or, definitely, the tra@ectory of my
own thinking over the past two decades+ as a reckoning with interpretation# &or me,
Winnicott is "sef"l in thinking of interpretation%as%obstacle= his in@"nction against
-"nnecessary interpretations,/ the analysts vain attempts to package knowledge or
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$ny progress )ve made as a writer has to do with s"btly placing myself in a position to be s"rprised# 7his
involves a willingness to keep my eyes closed, as it were= and also a frame of mind or attit"de that ) take
on, which ) find best capt"red in the notion of reverie. 7his will make it clear, later in this essay, why )m
so taken with W# R# ;ion, $ntonio &erro, 7homas ?gden, and other psychoanalytic theorists who see
reverie as a sort of energi9ed field that e:ists between analyst and analysand#
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) s"ppose theres a thin line between being self%conscio"s and talkingAlistening to oneself= and perhaps
,hillips notion of forgetting is a good way of making the distinction# )t co"ld also be said that being self%
conscio"s is a persec"tive way of relating to oneself6a conversation between self and self thats over
almost before its beg"n#
insight, is a lesson on how not to throw wrenches into the mechanics of play# 7he
significant, self%transforming moments in any session of play6and, by e:tension, in any
psychoanalytic session worth its salt6come only when the person -s"rprises himself or
herself,/ Winnicott writes# -)t is not the moment of my clever interpretation that is
significant#/
B
) dont think Winnicott is downplaying the role of the analyst= hes simply
seeing that role in a new light, imagining an attentive listener, a facilitator, someone who
creates the possibility of play by offering both presence and absence, akin to a good%
eno"gh mother who allows her child to be -alone in the presence of another#/
C

)nterpretation has at least the danger of interr"pting this pict"re of a relationship%in%
motion#
)s there a better depiction of the creative process than Winnicotts scene of play< )
dont think so# ;"t if the internal milie" of a writer6or any creative artist6mirrors the
enigmatic mi:t"re of presence and absence implied in childhood play or a psychoanalytic
session, sho"ldnt the reflection go the other way, too< 7hat is, wo"ldnt it make sense to
think of psychoanalysis as a creative enterprise, complete with its own obstacles< Why
does the portrayal of the relationship between creativity and the psychoanalytic process
so often take on the form of a one%way street< D;efore the problem of the creative
artist,D &re"d wrote in 120E, Danalysis m"st, alas, lay down its arms#D
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)s there something
dangero"s, or at least disarming, abo"t the creative artist< $re the two enterprises so very
different< 5ven taking into acco"nt the awe that psychoanalysts often feel in the face of
art, ,hillips is 8"ick to draw o"t the implications of this "neasy relationship= its the awe
B
D# W# Winnicott, -,laying' $ 7heoretical Statement,/ in !laying and "eality *London' Ro"tledge, 12F1+,
p# B1#
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See D# W# Winnicott, -7he 1apacity to be $lone,/ in The #aturational !rocesses and the Facilitating
$nvironment *Gew Hork' )nternational .niversities ,ress, 12CB+#
F
Sigm"nd &re"d, -Dostoevsky and ,arricide,/ in Collected !apers, vol# B *Gew Hork' ;asic ;ooks, 12B2+,
p# 000#
that creates his s"spicion# -)f psychoanalysts co"ld think of themselves as the makers of
sentences rather than of tr"ths,/ ,hillips writes, -they wo"ld feel less at odds with6feel
less need to privilege and covertly disparage6what &re"d called 1reative Writers#/
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$s one analyst said to me, d"ring a recent seminar, -Ho"re the real thing# Ho" live
in direct connection with yo"r "nconscio"s#/ 7ho"gh ) received it politely *it felt like a
compliment+, this statement made little sense to me# )s it really possible, theoretically,
that ) might be in any more connection with my "nconscio"s than anyone else< $nd of
co"rse this genero"s idea of writer%as%p"rveyor%of%"nconscio"s comes with its
complement6a form of respectf"l interpretation that somehow completes the pict"re#
7he writer e:ists in the playpen of "nconscio"s ob@ects= b"t someone is watching, making
sense of things, applying the discipline of reason# *?r even of tr"th#+ $fter all, what
response might one have to a novel or a movie or a play6especially a rich one, so f"ll of
grist for the mill6than interpretation< )s there really a higher compliment< $nd so yo"
see the model' the creative writer lies on the co"ch, and the psychoanalyst proffers her
alms of interpretation#
0
?de to &r"stration
E
,hillips, On Flirtation, p# E1#
$n emotional e:perience that is felt to be painf"l may initiate an attempt either
to evade or modify the pain according to the capacity of the personality to
tolerate fr"stration#
7he choice that matters to the psycho%analyst is one that lies between procedures
designed to evade frustration and those designed to modify it. That is the critical
decision.
W# R# ;ion, %earning from $&perience
'
&or a reader who is also a writer, ;ion can be inf"riating# Go matter the generosity
of his admirers, there is not geni"s to his prose= the entire oe"vre calls o"t for translation
into plain 5nglish# Still, ;ion e:"des a psychoanalytic attit"de that speaks to me,
especially in relation to creativity# )f creativity means anything, it consists of a
transformation of stuff6a way of taking a complicated emotional state, say, and p"tting it
in another form, whether it be a painting, a film, a photograph, or a short story# )n so
doing, a cr"de, "ncooked emotional state or feeling,
1I
which mightve simply atrophied,
gets reworked or retranslated#
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)n ;ions lang"age, this transformation is a movement
from beta%elements to alpha%f"nction6a way of taking something inchoate, with a mind
to ossify or ass"me a kind of deadness, and make it take on another form# (reaming is
what ;ion calls this process of transformation#
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$nd thats always the word that comes
to mind when ) think of what its like to write fiction6not beca"se a story takes on
2
W# R# ;ion, %earning from $&perience *London' !arnac ;ooks, 12C0+, pp# 3E, 02#
1I
)ts hard here to get the right lang"age for these little pieces of mental matter#
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7ho"gh perhaps not resolved, as in the description of psychoanalysis that prompted this article in the first
place' -&or the p"rposes of this written symposi"m we see psychoanalysis as a discipline which attempts to
resolve painf"l emotional conflicts thro"gh the in depth investigation of "nconscio"s motivations,
transference, and se:"ality#/ *1ome to think of it, investigation so"nds a little too forensic, doesnt it<+
10
?gden picks this "p and gets close, ) think, to defining pathology *not his word, of co"rse+ as the inability
to dream# See 7homas ?gden, -?n Got ;eing $ble to Dream,/ International )ournal of !sychoanalysis E3
*0II4+, pp# 1F%4I#
dreamlike 8"alities, b"t beca"se reverie is re8"ired to come "p with the story in the first
place#
&or ;ion, what keeps a person from this constant process of self%transformation6
perhaps crystalli9ed best in moments of childhood, where emotional states appear more
readily, more fre8"ently, more aggressively6is what he calls -intolerance of
fr"stration#/
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Seemingly "nknown emotions, which are hard at first to incorporate, tend
to be painf"l6and theres a nat"ral tendency to p"sh them away, to almost will their
none:istence, in order to prevent their thought. &r"stration, if not tolerated s"fficiently,
stops a person from metaboli9ing these pieces of diffic"lt%to%digest emotional material#
&or ;ion, the alternative to this process of incorporation6owning emotions, doing the
work of transforming them into more workable alternatives6is -evac"ation,/ or
sometimes -hall"cination/= its a way of taking something, a feeling that cant be
addressed or transformed, and p"tting it outside, which is where it feels like it came from
in the first place# $s ;ion p"ts it, somewhat cryptically, its possible for a person to be in
pain witho"t s"ffering pain# 7hat is, its possible to e:perience pain ob@ectively, as a
thing, instead of s"b@ectively, as a fr"strating, ongoing process# &or ;ion, itJs always the
difference between no"ns and verbs, between things fossili9ed into inaction and things
still alive, moving, and capable of modification#
13
14
$ltho"gh ;ion is known for his alphabeticalAmathematical preocc"pations, ) think the simple word
frustration is the key to his theory# ?n its s"rface, its a tro"blesome word in the world of psychoanalysis=
if yo" wanted to, yo" co"ld write a pretty shamef"l history of frustration in the h"ndred or so years of
psychoanalysis# $nd more than a few of the psychoanalytic connotations of the word are not to my liking
6the annoyingly moral category of a*stinence, and the ofttimes p"nitive nat"re of the reality principal.
$nd yet ) cant think of a term that better describes the process of writing# *?r of growing "p, for that
matter6as in the case of my five%year%old da"ghter, who seems "p to her ears in a daily t"ssling with beta%
elements#+
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&or ;ion, fr"stration isnt really a description of a response to an inevitable fact of life *i#e#, yo" cant
always get what yo" want+# &or instance, fr"stration doesnt call for a sober, rational antidote in the form
of e:plication# $nother no"n, e&plication is yet another way of sealing something off, arising from a
similar an:iety or irritability in reaction to diffic"lt emotion#
)m not 8"ite comfortable with the old adage abo"t artists living in more pain,
tho"gh in a limited ;ionian sense it makes for a good e:planation of the process of
creating art# *$nd fun is certainly not a word that wo"ld describe that process#+ )n ;ions
theory, beta%elements6if allowed to e:ist and trek their circ"ito"s ro"te inside and
o"tside and back inside6e:ist as fodder for creative acts# 7hey can be transformed into
something new6tho"ghts, for instance, or works of art# *,erhaps a tho"ght is itself a
work of art, witho"t the virt"osic fanfare#+ )f there is too m"ch intolerance of fr"stration,
then nothing gets to the point of being transformed, beca"se the tro"blesome bit of
emotion is e:perienced not s"b@ectively b"t as a foreign ob@ect that m"st be permanently
e:pelled#
1B
)n this vision, the -reality principle/ is less a slap in the face and more an
opport"nity= less a road to -progress/ or -development/ and more a sp"r for fantasy,
reverie, and the alteration of e:isting reality# Winnicott brings play into psychoanalysis,
making it almost a lifelong pro@ect and positing the ability to play as a criteria of mental
health= ;ion e:plains the intricacies6at the level of mental f"nctioning6of why it is that
some people can play and others cant# ;y e:tension, ;ion is describing the motor of
creation for artists6a process that is, by all acco"nts, always on the edge of collapsing
into an e:ercise in fr"stration#
1B
What )m not e:plaining here is the whole process by which beta%elements are transformed into alpha%
f"nction# )ts hardly a matter of @"st b"ckling down and forcing yo"rself to think the tho"ght, to admit the
emotion# )nstead, its a long%won battle *hence, the centrality of -tolerance of fr"stration/+ whereby the
tho"ght is e:pelled and contained by someone else *a parent, an analyst, a part of the self+ "ntil it can be
reincorporated# Winnicotts -good%eno"gh mother/ is an apt e:ample of someone who might do the work
of containing beta%elements= these beta%elements are never contained witho"t asking, of the second party, a
tolerance of fr"stration as well *which is analogo"s, ) think, to the mother in ob@ect%relations theory bearing
the assa"lt of the child and s"rviving it+#
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7hinkability
,sychoanalytic narration(is not only the narration of facts and
events# 7herefore it does not apply to a clinical case%presentation or to
the description of a psychoanalytic theory' it is never a te:t, b"t always
a conte:t, a plot, a relationship, a telling%somebody%who%is%
listening(#7he semiology of a te:t is far removed from
psychoanalysis, which calls for a semiology of the relationship#
Ki"seppe Di 1hiara, -Leeting, 7elling, and ,arting' 7hree ;asic
&actors in the ,sychoanalytic 5:perience/
1C
)n the psychoanalytic relationship, patients try to enco"rage memory,
desire, and comprehension= they also hope for c"re, revelations, or
possession of knowledge6those are, however, attempts to destroy the
link, distorting the verte: of the work' the "nknown# 7hose
psychoanalysts who cannot bear fr"stration(escape from the real
work, "sing memory, desire, and comprehensibility of the available
material#
Deocleciano ;endocchi $lves, -1onsiderations on Some of W# R#
;ions )deas/
1F
Laking a short skip from Winnicott to ;ion means that a few key items get tossed
overboard along the way, and typically its the more benign psychoanalytic notions# )
think of -corrective emotional e:perience,/ for one6tho"gh ) dont think its 8"ite fair to
b"rden Winnicott with this term#
1E
)ts been a key development in my thinking6my
psychoanalytic aesthetic, if ) can p"t it that way6to see some of the val"e in neo%
1C
+hared $&perience, The !sychoanalytic (ialogue, eds# L"ciana Gissim Lomigliano and $ndreina
Rob"tti *London' !arnac ;ooks, 1220+, p# 4F#
1F
-. ". .ion, .etween !ast and Future, eds# ,arthenope ;ion 7alamo, &ranco ;orgogno, and Silvio $#
Lerciai *London' !arnac ;ooks, 0III+, p# 31#
1E
) may be mi:ing apples and oranges, mangling the chronology, or offending some who sees more of a
distinction between ;ion and Winnoctt# *Lelanie !lein is l"rking here, in the shadows, and she is of
co"rse a controversial fig"re in psychoanalytic theory6b"t also someone ) havent read deeply#+ $lso,
note' the term corrective emotional e&perience is not Winnicotts b"t $le:anders= see &ran9 $le:ander,
D$nalysis of the 7herape"tic &actors in ,sychoanalytic 7reatment,D !sychoanalytic /uarterly 12 *12BI+,
pp# 3E2%BII#
!leinian ideas *partic"larly in the whole enigma of pro0ective identification, its
scatological lang"age of evacuation1 and to appreciate how these ideas make the analysts
role in the cons"lting room ever more complicated. )n this regard, the work of $ntonino
&erro has been cr"cial to me6both in drawing o"t the implications of ;ion and allowing
me to relate ;ionian concepts to the creative process# &erro is something of a
psychoanalytic watchdog, intent on ferreting o"t instances of what he likes to call
-sat"rated interpretations/ or -stopper%interpretations/
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6those orations, "ttered by even
the most empathic analysts, that can end a process rather than open it "p for f"rther
amplification# Lodestly, &erro "s"ally begins with himself6telling stories of his own
earlier mistakes, and describing the long road hes traveled# &erros psychoanalytic
ed"cation amo"nts, at least in retrospect, to a ;ionian revol"tion on a small scale#
0I
$s &erro p"ts it, bl"rring some of the distinction between therape"tic partners,
-$nalyst and patient are often in a position to call themselves two a"thors in search of
characters#/
01
)ts important to note that &erros interest in narrative6as in his book
title, !sychoanalysis as Therapy and +torytelling6is not a matter of the analysand taking
his or her -life story/ and coming "p with new ways of telling it
00
= &erro is more
interested in the "se of narrative, or playacting, within individ"al psychoanalytic sessions
6the taking%on of roles, for instance, which makes the analysts behavior less cond"cive
12
7he latter term is "sed in $ntonino &erro, +eeds of Illness, +eeds of "ecovery *Gew Hork' ;r"nner%
Ro"tledge, 0IIB+, p# F4# 7he former term is borrowed from ;ion# See, for instance, Wilfred R# ;ion,
Attention and Interpretation *London' !arnac ;ooks, 12E3+, p# 02#
0I
&or an interesting disc"ssion, see ,eter 1arnochan, -7he Mertices of )nterpretation' $ntonino &erros
5:tension of ;ion,/ Fort (a *&all 0II3+#
01
&erro, +eeds of Illness, p# 02#
00
,eople often think that a writer might be interested in a so%called narrative approach to psychoanalysis6
the taking of the material and forming it into a -story,/ which may involve a process of retelling or
retranslation# ;"t this approach doesnt really address the process of, or preconditions for, creating a story=
and, f"rthermore, people dont reali9e the e:tent to which the val"e of narrative is an open 8"estion in the
minds of many fiction writers# +tory can be seen as a sat"rated form of rhetorical presentation, in &erros
meaning6a neat clos"re that resists the messiness of incongr"ent narrative elements#
to the goal, at least in the moment, of a -corrective emotional e:perience/ for the
analysand# &or &erro, this kind of play, which involves that same form of forgetting that
,hillips mentioned earlier, is compromised by what he sees as ham%fisted psychoanalytic
interpretations#
$s ) arg"ed earlier, thinking too m"ch6which is, in a sense, analogo"s to the
anticipation of clever interpretation6is a h"ge problem for the creative artist# Whats
interesting abo"t &erro is how he also considers it a h"ge problem for the analyst# )n his
role of s"pervisor, for e:ample, whereas he once gave yo"ng analysts the advice to -think
before yo" speak,/ he now reverses this admonition, s"ggesting that speaking before
thinking can f"rther prod"ctive fantasy# N"st as the creative artist is at her best when
shes intent "pon not being intent6engaged in the -s"stained, forgetf"l self%listening/
that ,hillips describes6the psychoanalyst, according to &erro, needs to -make contact
with the dreamlike f"nctioning of the mind, which can create more connections and
meanings than any reasoning#/
04
7his theoretical revol"tion in psychoanalysis
03
interests me, e:cites me, as both a
person and an artist, perhaps most beca"se it 8"estions the very p"rpose or aim of
psychoanalysis6and, by e:tension, the aim of life itself# Go longer is the goal
necessarily to know oneself, in the time%honored philosophical sense, b"t to create
circ"mstances that are cond"cive to a person keeping alive the possibilities for
transforming emotional states that seem entrenched6or dead# &or &erro, the goal is -to
04
&erro, +eeds of Illness, p# 2#
03
) reali9e, of co"rse, that this revol"tion has perhaps more critics than adherents# Lany analysts wo"ld no
do"bt acc"se me *&erro, too<+ of throwing the baby o"t with the bathwater= its okay, theyd say, to 8"estion
the positivistic or rational bias of historical psychoanalysis, b"t need we be so modest in o"r search for
"nderlying tr"th and its c"rative val"e< $lso, )m somewhat playing fast and loose with the concept of
interpretation. &or &erro and others, there certainly isnt a clear line between interpretation and reverie or
play#
facilitate transformation toward thinkability rather than ca"sing persec"tion and
evac"ation#/
0B
)n this sense, thinka*ility is not abo"t facing the tr"th of who yo" are= its
abo"t creating a fl"idity between inside and o"tside, keeping alive the options of doing
something other than feeling hemmed in by either an internal @"dge or an e:ternal enemy#
7o my mind, this same fl"idity is at the center of artistic creation, and its instr"ctive to
see how fiction, for instance, performs the f"nction of reincorporating evac"ated
emotional states6and often, in the meanwhile, effacing the line between whats
acceptable and whats not#
-,sychoanalysis is not a symbolic system charged with deciphering meaning,/
&erro writes, 8"oting &ernando Riola, -b"t a system for generating new tho"ghts#/
0C
)n
this sense, psychoanalysis isnt a distant relative of artistic creativity6admiring it,
envying it, trying o"t interpretations in order to "nderstand it6b"t only more of the
same# $ sibling, in short# )n this view, psychoanalysis is less a proced"re than a practice#
)magine a room in which two people achieve states of reverie for the p"rpose of
generating new ways of thinking that relieve some of the press"re, or the overbearing
b"rden, of tho"ghts seemingly incapable of being transformed into anything else#
Geedless to say, this isnt for everyone, and certainly not for someone looking for, in
$lvess words, -c"re, revelations, or possession of knowledge#/ ;"t does psychoanalysis
have to be for everyone< ,erhaps thinka*ility is an ac8"ired taste, meant only for those
who think of frustration as an interesting challenge# Wo"ld it necessarily be a bad thing
to think of psychoanalysis as a sort of "sef"l and pleas"rable fiction abo"t the self and its
possibilities<
0B
&erro, +eeds of Illness, p# 42#
0C
$ntonino &erro, !sychoanalysis as Therapy and +torytelling *Gew Hork' Ro"tledge, 0IIC+, p# 20#