Adolescence and the crisis of originality

Proximity to parents
Early adolescence is a respite for family struck by storms of puberty .
Parent-child relationships seem, suddenly, they are placed into a search of mutual understanding and
approval of. It says the teenager , after reaching a steady plateau, wants to approach the parents and
show affection to: behold, now is polite, amiable, always ready to go along with adults. Usually also loving
brothers and younger sisters, who enjoy his company more than the parents.

Gladly confesses teen parents ...
The age confidences about his first flirtations, instead ask his parents are feeling confident about their
past. They are willing to hear the view of most in age . This view is often given with their romantic, this
provision, but is still relative, can undoubtedly allow many to avoid premature and traumatic sexual
experiences.

First sexual experience often marks the beginning of new claims
First sexual experience often coincides with a new period of affirmation of the ego and contempt for family
disrespect shown with safety stemmed from the conviction that reached adulthood. This age, the great
deniers, has been called juvenile crisis of originality. Teen and adult see adult rights claim. And because
of physical and intellectual maturity of growing up does not meet the social that would allow the person to
have an autonomous status, and many conflicts are inevitable.
Article Contents
1. Proximity to parents
2. Age appeal
3. Conflicts of authority
4. Conflicts of ideas
Age appeal
Up
Very good understanding of adolescent parents is a sign of addiction and its a certain inferiority. He
rebels against this protectionist and paternalistic attitudes. He will not be allowed to wake up at noon, and
in fact do not you do it, but claims to recognition that right if it likes. I'll do if it's my favorite is the cry of
war. At first teen knows what does not.
His major concern in relation to adults is to establish relations of equality and not the relationship kind of
educated and educator. His haste to take his own responsibilities oblige, as he feels himself, and begin to
define themselves by denying the child who was not there and not thinking based than others. Knowing
your I start by knowing what he does not accept what he thinks, what he wants.

The confrontation between experience and rules imposed culminates conflicts sometimes very sharp, but
always must keep in mind the emotional dimension of this struggle. Even if each of the opponents seems
to be situated on a firm, he does not want to break the relationship, but to establish a contract with the
opposite true. The teenager is particularly sensitive to the manifestations of rejection and judgment from
adults, which criticizes the behavior but recognizes its stability and even experience. This ambiguity
transpires in his shyness, lack of confidence forces him to take as reference the adult, which eventually
will confirm the opinion he has of himself.
Adults, on the other hand, teens appreciate continuously, but want to exercise the full authority, they need
to visibly confirm their educational skills and such behavior is as their ambiguous as that of teenagers. In
this way reach a climate of uncertainty created by some and by others, favorable reactions and oscillating
extremely passionate.

False conflicts of detail
Discussions in contradiction of teenagers and parents, discussion of which violence can be extremely
high, have, however, minor incidents as a starting point. Teen try adult resistance affirming his opinion on
some seemingly trivial details (eg hair length). If none of the opponents do not want to give, is that
discussion, apparently absurd, is an expression of tension with profound implications in family life . The
bitter discussions are often those where at one time no one remembers because it has caused.

Anticonformismul adolescent
Adolescent always express judgments without appeal, he loves or hates, or infect finds a terrible thing. In
fact he soon impose its taste than to express, also important for him not to go unnoticed: clothing should I
be original or cracked, accessories and clothing have to do all to scrasneasca of teeth, standing room
should look worse than a hole, do everything just to be different from friends of his parents. Not afraid of
one thing only: that he might be accuse or be accused by friends of conformity.
Arises from group conformity ...

Yet, less sure of himself, challenging and shy also, need to be supported by those of one mind with him.
Most outrageous extravagance and not allow them unless they perform other young people with it, so the
value is certain tastes and opinions. A youth group already formed is built around the same tastes, the
same desire. It is for him a means to find support in the fight with adults. This leads to anticonformism
ostentatiously displayed in a surprising conformity. "All young people resemble each other" parents say.
Advertising also contributed to the generalization of certain preferences of young people, so they reach
their age-specific norms of behavior, but are just as conformist as adults.
The new hero of youth, the replacement of the old knight, I impose the image of his omnipotence by long
hair, the dress was eccentric, the dirt or on the contrary, with a little anachronistic narcissism. His outfit,
designed to demonstrate victory in its sole discretion, is quickly copied by many young people who said, "I
dress this way because I love". Using this motif show, of course, is not preaching about the aesthetics,
but as important is to display your independent thinking, it takes a little "scandal" that you impose, in the
absence of really valid arguments.

Arguments masks real disagreements on the details
This behavior apparently infantile refusal to betray parents and children to have an exchange of views
among themselves on key issues. A real danger lies in the ease with which teens get to dramatize (from
running away from home, to suicide ) this kind of conflict that can not be solved with traditional "pair of
hands".
Parents are not so hostile, as they seem, these forms of rebellion against the teens, now they look more
willing to make concessions than when they were children during puberty, but most prefer to teens talk
about something other than about the moral, ethical or political. Question still arises: if these conflicts
arise because of minor problems but sometimes take sudden twists fiery that it does not reveal that some
others concealing anxiety or claims deeper?
Conflicts of authority
As during the pre-teens and teens during the conflicts of authority is first, but have a different hue. Young
or young looking not only to say: they look for a statute to establish certain rights. Moreover, advertising
these rights or wish to revise and redistributing them soon.

Parents and teens are asking that ...

It talks a lot about a "crisis of authority" that exceeds the family. It is typical of our age because for the first
time, no longer an issue before the young swift severe jolts an authority recognized by all as necessary,
but rather solidarity such authority is questioned both the parents and the young , which creates a state of
hesitation and uncertainty in relations among them. One of the reasons this state of things is the
undoubtedly extend their education and schooling, is a paradox of maintaining increasingly extended into
a state of dependence on material and moral young people who have reached maturity physiological.
Legal age of consent in many cases is not even the teenager is able to earn a living, from year to year
removes social adulthood while puberty is not only to decrease. To assist new phenomenon of "teen-
ager"-s, adult sex, but still considered irresponsible children.

The soundness of their authority ...

Add to this worship of youth, prevalent in movies and in advertising, both adults and ridiculous
stubbornness of wanting to compete with young people in terms of fashion, sport and erotic life, we
understand the frontier of these young adults will and these young adults will no longer distinct delimited
and why adults do not have the same autoritatte on youth. Their relationship, becoming more ambiguous,
move increasingly toward outright rivalry.
In the family, conflicts of authority taken, most often as a conflict over trivial limits: at what age you are
entitled to smoke the first cigarette, take the first lipstick, go out with friends? At what time you are allowed
to go home tonight?

Limits can not be determined only through dialogue
Up to a limit, it is normal for young people to try to exceed slightly, and parents to do so that it is
respected. Conflict will never be bad if the rule was accepted by both parties. The difficulty stems from
uncertainty over their own parents decision, the variation limits a family to another and the influence of
cinema and literature that "proves" that young people are very free. In reality, parents and children who
do not discuss or disagree with each other rarely courage to examine together, openly, problem: to a
certain age and in such circumstances you are allowed to smoke the first cigarette or give your lipstick on
lips at such reasonable time to come home. Parents find it easier to set rules in principle, often having as
their landmark adolescence, because for them there springs a moral security, safety is not wrong. Rigidity
of this organization of life how it exasperates the teenager, who finds it's ridiculous to be asked to return
at twelve at night and not at twelve and a half. Thus, it is easier to have a systematic approach to
examine protest only reasonable question.
To get out of trouble, the solution is looking for a cure excessive prohibitions or a total indulgence, and
the other one and they only aggravate it.

Rigidity and tolerance are as bad borne
Tightening of the rules of behavior by parents of adolescents can remove even more of a dialogue
between them, but it appears excessive indulgence rightly resigns as parents, they still want to be
protected from themselves, or at least be guided and limited in their actions. It might sound disappointing,
the teens fear nothing more than the parents, friends.
These young sensitive, an excess of concern and the "understanding" they feel even more suspect than
the "rigidity". They discover in his desire to be controlled autonomy and make decisions when they feel
observed, spied. Trying to go to meet their smallest desires seems like a blackmail them emotionally . 17-
18 years adolescent desire is to find the true face of a man: neither flabby nor constable, but a being
endowed with the power of judgment and will. Can not miss that it is standard for him you stimeaza adult
attitude.
A father and unable to show his son that he must take into account, because there really, it will leave it
somewhat disquieted and anxious face a multitude of possibilities. Rather a "raisoneur" but a reasonable
one and knows what, but the teenager would still be given responsibility for his actions, can understand
that freedom is limited by the duties arising from common life, may even prove to be apt to give up some
of his wishes, when i leave and their right to meet, but still making it to reflect on.
Conflicts of ideas
Adolescence: age education sentimental
Reactivation of Oedipal problems, more or less resolved in childhood, put it in front of election adolescent
sexual choice often accused of the attitude of parents. Sarcasm contributes to making this unbearable
guilt in a sense, which can cause different behaviors:
- Submitting to adult desire and choice giving up heterosexual. The teenager remains "tied to mother's
skirt," not going out, is shy and inhibited in front of people of sex opposite leaves sometimes one partner
is required;
- Rupture of the family: the case of very early marriages of certain young people escape from a family too
anguishing or pressure exerted on them too strong, these marriages are dangerous enough as guilt,
made the gesture of rupture, often generates tensions between the newlyweds;
- Choosing a partner in the image of parents: boy chooses a wife, mother, the girl who quit his
responsibilities; amorezeaza daughter is a seductive father's age.
It seems that in this area as in others, is particularly important that parents know how to overcome
emotional while they are frustrated, to actually help the teenager. The task is more difficult, the more the
teenager, bashful and passionate, consider any attempt to abuse the dialogue as a mixture of problems.
Still needs to be helped: if preteen sex education is age, adolescence is the age sentimental education.