Rebecca Leon

ECAE 2003
September 17, 2013

Reflection #2
Learning About Family Structures & Fairness


In order to understand a child, you first have to understand what kind of family they
come from. By identifying different family structures, as an early childhood educator, you are
better equipped to answering questions from children. Moreover, you can create a loving and
accepting community in your classroom. Children arent perfect- they are going to ask questions
based on the differences they see in other families. If a child observes that another child happens
to have only one parent, they are going to ask questions. By being conscious of the words we
use, we can affirm the reality that the world we live in today is much different than before. It is
made of up of many families- each unique and to be respected.
While reading the article, I was intrigued by the idea that as educators, in order to answer
questions children will have about their families, we have to be open minded. Disregarding the
biased feelings and attitudes that have seeped into our minds, we have to consider how our words
will affect a child. Children who come from adoptive families might not feel comfortable
explaining their situation. When we use words like, real mom and real dad (something that
Im also guilty of at times), it undermines the value that the child places to their family. The
definition of a family has evolved over the years. When I was a child, I didnt understand that
having a step-dad and half-sisters is a common thing. I felt weird and uncomfortable every time I
had to explain someone that my biological dad had died and that my sisters were in fact, my half-
sisters.
Also, sometimes a child will blame themselves for their parent not being around and we
need to reassure children that they are not to blame for these situations. Children, today, come
from very complex backgrounds and need assurance that the classroom that they are entering in
is indeed a safe space, where they will be loved and accepted. We may not have all the answers-
that are okay. But teachers do need to open up the lines of communication between parents so
that they get a better understanding of the family. One thing that caught my attention was when
the article mentioned that teachers by asking questions should aim to get to know the parents.
Do not expect to learn everything you want to know in one conversation. It takes time and trust
to really know someone. I agree with this statement- but what happens for example, if you have
parents who are just really private and dont want to have a relationship with the teacher? In
what ways can a teacher get to know the parent over time?