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Sociologists tell us that according to statistics there is a great likelihood that:
(1) a child of an alcoholic will be one, (2) a child of an abuser will be one, (3) a child of poverty will stay one, (4) and a child of a broken home will have one.
These statistics fail to recognize a God Who says: "If any man be in Christ, he is a new creature." - II Cor. 5:17. We can be "...born again, not of a perishable seed, but of imperishable." - I Peter 1:23. We can "...forget what lies behind and reach forward to what lies ahead." - Phil. 3:13.
I believe I am a living testimony to the truth of Gods Word.
Sociologists tell us that according to statistics there is a great likelihood that:
(1) a child of an alcoholic will be one, (2) a child of an abuser will be one, (3) a child of poverty will stay one, (4) and a child of a broken home will have one.
These statistics fail to recognize a God Who says: "If any man be in Christ, he is a new creature." - II Cor. 5:17. We can be "...born again, not of a perishable seed, but of imperishable." - I Peter 1:23. We can "...forget what lies behind and reach forward to what lies ahead." - Phil. 3:13.
I believe I am a living testimony to the truth of Gods Word.
Sociologists tell us that according to statistics there is a great likelihood that:
(1) a child of an alcoholic will be one, (2) a child of an abuser will be one, (3) a child of poverty will stay one, (4) and a child of a broken home will have one.
These statistics fail to recognize a God Who says: "If any man be in Christ, he is a new creature." - II Cor. 5:17. We can be "...born again, not of a perishable seed, but of imperishable." - I Peter 1:23. We can "...forget what lies behind and reach forward to what lies ahead." - Phil. 3:13.
I believe I am a living testimony to the truth of Gods Word.
is a great likelihood that: (1) a child of an alcoholic will be one, (2) a child of an abuser will be one, (3) a child of poverty will stay one, (4) and a child of a broken home will have one. These statistics fail to recognize a God Who says: "If any man be in Christ, he is a new creature." -' II Cor. 5:17. We can be " ... born agairi, not of a perishable seed, but of imperishable."- I Peter 1:23. We can " .. .forget what lies behind and reach forward to what lies ahead." -PhiL 3:13. 1 believe 1 am a living testimony to the truth of Gods Word. My name is Sarah Elizabeth Chandler. 1 was born on August 23, 1955, in Gadsden, Alabama. 1 have. three brothers and a sister. 1 am the middle child of five. My childhood home was first damaged by divorce. Before the divorce was final, my father left and never returned, So at the age of twenty-six, my mother was left with four small children and one on the way. I was four years old at the time. Those formative years were characterized by rejection, ihsecurity, alcoholism, immorality and sexual abuse by close family members. I can still remember my mother's intoxicated boyfriend wildly driving us through the streets and beating my mother mercilessly. There is only one way to explain why we were not killed on numerous occasions - God's divine protection. 1 well remember my mother leaving us alone, sometimes for days at a , time, while she was out seeking fulfillment by , drinking and partying. After being warned several times by the county welfare department, my mother was judged an unfit mother and' lost custody of her children. , We went to live with my , grandparents because the welfare department informed them that we would be placed in foster care unless a family member agreed to take custody. Once we were in their custody, my 12 '" THE COUNSEL of Chalcedon 'l' February/March, 1998 mother left us. For the next five years; I was fatherless and motherless. My grandparents were not Christians and had their own problems. My grandfather had severe mental disorders and at times was very violent. He had become addicted to , prescription and over the counter drugs. My grandmother became ' a very bitter WOnlan. She resented her daughter dumping five children in her lap and leaving her with all the responsibility of raising them. Though we were helpless children, she took out her resentment on us. We felt rejected and.were subjected to daily cursing and verbal abuse from her: Neither she nor my grandfather knew or seemed to care about showing love. As small children, we were never held, hugged, told we were loved, or received any words of encouragement. Oh, how I longed and needed someone to love me! I didn't know at the age of eight that things could get any worse, but they did. When 1 was twelve years old, my grandparents were notified that my mother had been involved in an auto love me. Shortly after my Wmston Chandler and I accident with Ii. school bus. sixteenth birthday, however, were married. His love was She was not hurt, but a I came home from school to in many ways similar to the seven year old girl had been find my cousin cleaning out incomparable love ofjesus killed. It was determined she my room. With no which I was to fmd later in had been drinking at the explanation, I was told I life. This wonderful man has time of the accident. After would have to find another continued to love me and my mother was arrested and place to live. I was shattered. teach me how to give love taken to jail, she suffered a At sixteen years old, I was back for twenty- five years. I nervous breakdown, and the rejected and homeless. am constantly amazed at court ordered her to a state Returning to my mother was God's grace in giving me this mental hospital. She not an option since she was marriage at just the right received treatment for her serving a one-year prison time in my life. I realize now breakdown and addiction to sentence for first degree that it saved me from alcohol. After only a few manslaughter. following in my mother's weeks, she refused My oldest brother and his immoral lifestyle. My treatment, packed her bags new wife took pity on me husband was the first person and walked out of the and temporarily provided in my life to demonstrate hospital. As a result, the me a place to live. Little did what true love is in all its court ordered her to serve a I know in my forlorn and facets. Even though I came six-month jail term. hopeless situation that God to him with terrible Mother came back into had brought me to Atlanta emotional scars, my our lives when I was thirteen to give me the loving and husband loved me for who I and brought a new step- stable environment for was and has never ceased to father with her. He treated which I longed. I did not let me know how much he her in the same fashion as know anything of God's loves me though the road many of the former men in character then, but now I has been rough at times. her life. He was addicted to realize that during those I had hoped that my new alcohol and was verbally and difficult times He gave me mother-in-law and I would physically abusive to the hope. I believed that better be able to enjoy a special entire family. days had to come, and by friendship. Though we When I was fourteen, I God's grace, they did. began our relationship well, came to visit relatives for the Just before my sixteenth it did not last. Once again I summer. Since I was now birthday, God brought a would face rejection for old enough to choose where young man into my life who, years to come. My husband I wanted to live, an older in spite of my terrible assumed the role of cousin agreed to assume background, genuinely protector, but it didn't take custody of me. I had hoped loved me and cared for me. long to see how his mother that at last I would have a A few weeks before my truly felt about me. Because real home and someone to seventeenth birthday, James of her rejection and refusal February/March, 1998 '" THE COUNSEL of Chalcedon 'I' 13 to forgive and accept me, studying it. The Holy Spirit mother's negative role model she missed out on knowing used Gods Word to and the terrible relationships the only three grandchildren penetrate and convict my I had with my grandmother with whom God would bless heart of my sinfulness and and mother-in-law, God has her. She died in March of need of a Savior. I saw that given me the gift of 1996. the root of my problems was mothering. He has imparted Shortly after our third not the terrible way I had to mea tenderness and deep wedding anniversary; God been treated as a child. My joy in this high calling. God had already blessed us with sin stood between me and a has been faithful to put two beautiful sons. By the saving relationship with godly Christian counselors time the boys were two and Christ. I professed a and women in my life since I four I began to feel tugs at superficial "religion" but I became a Christian who my heart to get them into had never confessed my sins have mentored me in all church. I believed that being and embraced Christ as my those areas where my life in a church would somehow Savior. was lacking godly models. make you a better person, so On October 11, 1984, at I was determined with I decided to join. I'm not the age of twenty-nine, I fell God's help to raise our two sure how I was able to do it, on my face before God and sons in a stable environment but when the leaders of the confessed that I was a si=er and teach thern to honor church met with me and and cried out for mercy and God. Despite our parenting asked their questions, they forgiveness. I pled for peace ups and downs, God has seemed satisfied and and the Prince of Peace, my blessed us With two sons of admitted me iilto church Savior, the LordJesus Christ, whom I can say, "these are membership. I immediately came into my life bringing. my beloved sons in whom I became involved in church His perfect peace and am well pleased." Chad is activities. I did everything I cleansing power. "Then I now twenty-two and Justin thought a good church acknowledged my sin to you is twenty. Both boys are member should do, but I and did not cover up my active in tninistering to other continued to have a iniquity. I said, 'I will confess young people and discipling tremendous void inside. my transgressions to the them in the Lord. God is Worst of all, 1 had no peace Lord' - and you forgave the faithfuL and struggled with severe guilt of my sin." - Psalm What more could we depression and even had 32:5. possibly need with all these suicidal thoughts. If someone were to ask blessings? God always goes God's providence was me to describe my greatest beyond even what we could again evident in my life. A achievement in life, what I ask or think iri blessing us. friend invited me to a consider the source of my Six weeks after our women's Bible study called, greatest joy, I would respond eighteenth wedding "Precept Upon Precept" that that it is the privilege of a=iversary, our daughter got me reading the Bible and being a mother. Despite my Brittany was born. God has 14 :j: THE COUNSEL of Chalcedon :j: FebruarylMarch, 1998 redeemed the mother- enabled to forgive and love fulfill the cycle of abuse, daughter relationship for me my mother without allowing addiction and an immoral by enabling me to develop a her to control and lifestyle be explained in light godly, loving relationship manipulate me. I pray that of all the statistics? I can with my little girl. At seven, Gods grace would reach her only attribute my being Brittany is full of j oy and heart, and that He would see plucked as a brand from the love, a constant source of fit to bring her to repentance fire to one thing - God's blessing to me and the rest and saving faith so that our amazing grace! He alone can of our family. Along with her relationship can be intervene in our lives and brothers, Brittany shows redeemed. make whole that which was evidence of her trust in My dad, on the other broken, AGAINST ALL Christ as her Savior. How hand, returned to our small ODDS! Let God be true and wonderful to be able to trust town two years after I was every man a liar. To God the promises of a covenant- saved in 1986. I never had alone be all the glory!!! keeping God. the opportunity to meet him "But because of his great The sociologists' or tell him that I forgave love for us, God, who is rich predictions have proven him. He died with a massive in mercy, made us alive with accurate for my three heart attack while in a Christ even when we were brothers and one sister. All drunken stupor at the age of dead in transgressions - it three brothers have fifty-nine. When I attended is by grace you have been experienced broken homes, his funeral, I was grieved saved. And God raised us up prison sentences, lives of that I had never known my with Christ and seated us sexual immorality, sexual earthly father and that he with him in the heavenly abuse, drunkenness and had never known me. But realms in Christ jesus, in severe drug addiction. My one day while I was crying order that in the coming sister, though she has never to God about my sadness of ages he might show the been in prison, has been never knowing my dad, He incomparable riches of his divorced and remains comforted my heart through grace, expressed in his trapped in an emotional His word: "for in Christ, I kindness to us in Christ prison with a severe drug became your father through jesus. For it is by grace you addiction. I cry out to the the gospel...", - I Cor. have been saved, through Lord daily that His mercy 4:15b. I know now that I faith - and this is not from would be extended to save lack nothing, neither father yourselves, it is the gift of them. nor mother. God is all in all God - not by works, so At this time, my mother is to me, the One to Whom I that no one can boast. For still alive, divorced, addicted can always run, crying out, we are God's workmanship, to alcohol and various "ABBA [Daddy], Father," created in Christ jesus to do medications. I diligently try confident that His loving good works, which God to have a relationship with arms will always be open prepared in advance for us her. Through God's love and wide. to do." - Ephesians 2:4-10. forgiveness in my life, I am How can my failure to NIV FebruarylMarch, 1998 THE COUNSEL of Chalcedon 15
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