Are We Confusing Passionate Love with

Irrationality? Putting Passionate Love into a

Cognitive-Behavioral Framework

IOANA R. PODIN
1
LAVINIA USCESCU
2

CRISTINA MOGOAE
3



Abstract
Though passionate love has been scientifically investigated for about three
decades, current definitions raise concerns about this concept as they clus-
ter cognitions, emotions, and behaviors under the label of emotional state.
This is in clear contradiction to the cognitive-behavioral framework. There-
fore, the current study attempted to provide a cognitive-behavioral under-
standing of passionate love, arguing that the core feature of passionate love
is an irrational way of thinking. We investigated the relationship between
passionate love and irrationality, assuming a positive association between
these concepts. Exploratory, we analyzed the relationship between irrational-
ity and the cognitive, emotional, and behavioral components of passionate
love. Also, we looked at the relationship between passionate love and ra-
tionality.
For the aims of this cross-sectional study, we recruited 139 volunteers who
had been in love in the past or currently in love. They filled in the Passionate
Love Scale and the short form of the General Attitude and Beliefs Scale. Re-
sults supported our hypothesis in that overall irrationality was positively as-
sociated to overall passionate love (r (137) = .311, p < .001), as well as with
its cognitive (r (137) = .355, p < .001), emotional (r (137) = .280, p < .001),
and behavioral components (r (137) = .246). Passionate love was not asso-
ciated to rationality levels.
Based on the positive association to irrationality, a vulnerability factor to
psychopathology and on the lack of an association to rationality, passionate
love is most probably unhealthy. However, it remains to be seen in what re-
spect it is unhealthy. One possibility is that passionate love could be a vul-


1. Department of Clinical Psychology and Psychotherapy, Babe-Bolyai University, Cluj-
Napoca, Romania;
2. Department of Psychology, Ludwig Maximilians University Munich, Munich, Germany;
3. Department of Clinical Psychology and Psychotherapy, Babe-Bolyai University; No. 37,
Republicii St., 400015, Cluj-Napoca, Romania; Telephone/Fax number: +40
746367186/+40 0264434141; E-mail: cristina.mogoase@gmail.com


50 | IOANA R. PODIN; LAVINIA USCESCU; CRISTINA MOGOAE
nerability factor for subsequent general distress/romantic distress. Addi-
tional venues of research are discussed.
Keywords
Irrationality, passionate love, cognitive-behavioral framework


For the last three decades passionate love (Hatfield & Walster, 1978) or at-
traction (Fisher, 1998) has stirred the interest of neuroscientists, psycholo-
gists, and sociologists alike. Theoretically, passionate love is a transitional
phase from lust to companionate love, while conceptually it is generally re-
garded as an emotional/motivational state of longing for union with anoth-
er (Hatfield & Walster, 1978, p. 9; Fisher, 1998). In light of these general
views, passionate love is better understood in contrast to companionate love,
from which it is markedly distinct (for a review, Reis & Aron, 2008).
Emotionally speaking, while companionate love has been found to elicit
feelings of calm, long-term attachment, and emotional constancy, passionate
love was characterized by fast switches between positive and negative feel-
ings (Hatfield & Rapson, 1987; Hatfeld & Rapson, 1996; Kim & Hatfield, 2004).
Cognitively speaking, while companionate love allows for a normal allocation
of cognitive resources to everyday activities, passionate love interferes with
cognitive processes and reflects in repetitive and obsessive thoughts about
the loved one (Hatfield & Rapson, 1987). These differences are neurally em-
bedded, companionate love being associated to oxytocin and vasopressin
and passionate love being associated to reward related neurotransmitters,
such as dopamine (Insel, 2003; Hatfield & Rapson, 2009).
Most of the emotional, cognitive, and neural particularities of passionate
love remind of psychopathology. For instance, passionate love is thought to
share brain similarities to addiction. Namely, brain areas associated to re-
ward and euphoria have an increased activity in passionately in love people
when viewing the faces of significant others, but not when looking at the fac-
es of friends or family (Bartels & Zeki, 2000). Therefore, scientific evidences
seem to indicate that passionate love not only sets apart individuals smitten
with love from those in other stages of love, but also brings them closer to
endophenotypes of psychopathology, giving a new meaning to the expres-
sion crazy in love. In light of the complex cognitive, behavioral, chemical,
and brain correlates of passionate love, we argue that it is reductionist to lim-
Are We Confusing Passionate Love with Irrationality? | 51

it the definition of passionate love to a powerful emotional state (Hatfield &
Rapson, 2009, p.1), as it has been done so far. We discuss these issues below.
As previously stated, current definitions of passionate love raise concerns
about this concept. They tend to cluster cognitions, emotions, and behaviors
under the label of emotional state. This label is in contradiction to modern
views on cognitions and emotional-behavioral responses which bring for-
ward a causal relationship between these concepts. According to the ABC
model of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (Ellis, 1994) various events (A; e.g.,
My partner is away) trigger cognitions or beliefs (B, e.g., I cannot leave
without my partner) which cause behavioral and emotional consequences
(C, e.g., frequent phone calls, depression). Therefore, following this reason-
ing not only is passionate love more than an emotional state, but its core fea-
ture is in essence cognitive.
Another relevant aspect that requires attention is the nature of the cogni-
tions underling passionate love. It is generally believed that passionately in
love individuals are irrational. This common sense intuition could be very
close to a scientific fact. Irrational cognitions are defined by the Rational
Emotive Behavior Therapy, as illogical, inconsistent with reality, and interfer-
ing with a persons goals (Ellis, 1994). Following this definition, marker cogni-
tions of passionate love, such as intrusive and persistent thoughts about
ones partner or idealization of ones partner, fall under this label (e.g., Pas-
sionate Love Scale,), therefore could be considered irrational.
Similar to passionate love, irrational beliefs have been linked to several
psychopathological disorders (for a review see, Browne, Dowd, & Freeman,
2010). They are seen, particularly the core/general irrational beliefs, as cogni-
tive vulnerability factors for psychopathology. Unlike irrational beliefs, ra-
tional thoughts are logical, empirically based, flexible (e.g., I would prefer
for my partner not to go away, but if he does I can tolerate this situation in-
stead of If my partner went away, I would find it unbearable) and are con-
sidered protective factors against psychopathology (Caserta, Dowd, David, &
Ellis, 2010).
If passionately in love individuals are indeed irrational, as argued above,
this could provide an explanation for the aforementioned analogy between
love and some forms of psychopathology. Furthermore, viewing irrationality
as a vulnerability factor in the diathesis-stress model could help explain why
in interaction with negative life events, such as rejection, passionately in love
individuals tend to experience depression or anxiety (Meloy & Fisher, 2005;


52 | IOANA R. PODIN; LAVINIA USCESCU; CRISTINA MOGOAE
Fisher et al, 2010). However, we do not suggest that passionately in love indi-
viduals go through a mental health crisis. Just as passionate love is universal-
ly experienced, so are irrational thoughts. As such, we argue that the pres-
ence of irrationality in passionately in love individuals can act as a vulnera-
bility factor to psychopathology, but only in interaction with negative life
events and other vulnerability factors.
To sum up, the present article attempts to provide a cognitive-behavioral
understanding of passionate love, arguing that the core feature of passionate
love is an irrational way of thinking. As a result, we aim to investigate the re-
lationship between passionate love and irrationality. Passionate love was as-
sessed via the Passionate Love scale (Hatfield & Sprecher, l986) and irration-
ality was measured by means of the General Attitude and Beliefs Scale, Short
Form (GABSSF, Lindner, Kirkby, Wertheim, & Birch, 1999).
Of note, we hypothesized that passionate love was positively associated to
irrationality. Exploratory, we investigated the relationship between passion-
ate love and rationality. Another exploratory attempt was to analyze, in de-
tail, the relationship between irrationality and the cognitive, emotional, and
behavioral components of the passionate love scale, following the classifica-
tion of Hatfield & Sprecher (1986).
Method
Participants
We recruited 139 volunteers (age: M = 22.320 years, SD = 5.241, 87.769 %
women). Selected participants had to have been in love in the past or cur-
rently in love. As such, 95 participants were currently in love and 44 partici-
pants had been in love in the past. The study was approved by the Babe-
Bolyai Universitys Review Board. Volunteers signed an informed consent
and received credits for participation.


Are We Confusing Passionate Love with Irrationality? | 53

Instruments
Passionate Love. For the purposes of this study, we used the 30 item version
of the Passionate Love Scale (PLS; Hatfield & Sprecher, l986). The PLS is an
instrument which measures the intensity of passionate love by summing up
all the items. Each item is rated on a 9 point Likert scale, varying from 1 (i.e.,
not at all true) to 9 (definitely true). Adequate psychometric properties have
been reported for the PLS (see Hatfield & Sprecher, 1986; Sprecher & Regan,
1998). In our sample, Alpha Cronbach was .95. As we were also interested in
the cognitive, emotional, and behavioral components of PLS, we followed
Hatfields & Sprechers (1986) cluster recommendations and computed sepa-
rate scores for each of the three outcomes. Internal consistency for the cogni-
tive, emotional, and behavioral clusters varied from = .70 (behavioral) to =
.92 (emotional).
Irrational and rational beliefs. In the current study we measured general
irrationality and rationality via the short form of the General Attitude and Be-
liefs Scale (GABSSF; Lindner, Kirkby, Wertheim, & Birch, 1999). GABS-SF is a
26-item instrument intended to measure general irrational and rational be-
liefs in the form of appraisals. The GABSSF was previously adapted and vali-
dated on the Romanian population (Trip, 2007), having a good reliability (Al-
pha Cronbach = .81). In the current sample, internal consistency was = .90
for irrationality and = .76 for rationality.
Procedure
The current study had a correlational design. Volunteers were recruited in
the current research based on their romantic history. They had to have been
in love in the past or to be currently in love. All participants signed an in-
formed consent prior to enrollment in the study. Following, volunteers were
assessed their passionate love levels by means of the PLS scale and their gen-
eral irrational and rational beliefs by means of the GABS-SF scale. For the
purposes of the study, when filling in the PLS scale, volunteers had to think
about the partner with whom they were currently in love or had been in love
with in the past.


54 | IOANA R. PODIN; LAVINIA USCESCU; CRISTINA MOGOAE
Results
Preliminary analyses
Mean scores on the overall rationality, overall irrationality, and passionate
love along with the cognitive, emotional, and behavioral dimensions of PLS
are presented in Table 1. With reference to our inclusion criteria, there were
no significant differences, in terms of overall passionate love levels, between
individuals who were currently in love and individuals who had been in love
in the past, t (137) = .091, p = .928.
Main results
The associations between the investigated variables are displayed in Table 1.
As evidenced below, there were significant and positive correlations between
irrationality and overall passionate love, as well as between irrationality and
the cognitive, emotional, and behavioral components of passionate love.
However, there were no significant associations between rationality and
overall passionate love or its cognitive, emotional, and behavioral dimen-
sions.
Are We Confusing Passionate Love with Irrationality? | 55

Table 1. Descriptive data and correlations between key variables.

Mean
(SD)
1 2 3 4 5 6
1. Overall Pas-
sionate Love
198.251
(38.297)
1 .943* .984* .838* .311* .002
2. Passionate Lo-
ve: cognitive
51.330
(12.700)
1 .887* .742* .355* -.028
3. Passionate Lo-
ve: emotional
124.273
(23.733)
1 .785 .280* .017
4. Passionate Lo-
ve: behavioral
29.525
(5.175)
1 .246* .027
5. Overall
Irrationality
57.280
(12.525)
1 -.302*
6. Overall
Rationality
16.554
(2.032)
1
Note. * p < .005 Bonferonni corrected for multiple comparisons
Furthermore, following the conceptualization of the cognitive ABC model,
we performed a regression analysis with consequences as criterion (i.e., the
emotional and cognitive components of PLS) and the cognitive component
of PLS as predictor. As such, PLS-cognitive turned out to be a significant
predictor of both emotional, B = 1.657, SE = .074, CI = [1.511; 1.803], and
behavioral responses, B = .302, SE = .023, CI = [.256; .348]. These results
validate the cognitive ABC model.
Discussion
Passionate love is commonly seen as irrational and scientific inquiry
acknowledged its multilayered nature (i.e., its cognitive, emotional, and be-
havioral components). Despite this, passionate love has continued to be con-
ceptualized mainly as an emotional state (e.g., Hatfield & Rapson, 2009), and,
to our knowledge, no study has attempted to investigate its irrational nature


56 | IOANA R. PODIN; LAVINIA USCESCU; CRISTINA MOGOAE
using a cognitive-behavioral framework. Therefore, this cross-sectional study
was meant to provide a preliminary investigation of this topic.
Our results showed a significant positive association between overall pas-
sionate love and irrationality. This association remained significant when
considering the cognitive, emotional, and behavioral components of pas-
sionate love. A larger association was evidenced when considering the rela-
tionship between the cognitive component of passionate love and irrationali-
ty. Building on this latter association and in accordance with the cognitive
ABC model, the cognitive component of passionate love significantly pre-
dicted the emotional and behavioral dimensions of passionate love.
Overall, these results support our hypothesis regarding the positive rela-
tionship between passionate love and irrationality, suggesting that passion-
ate love might be unhealthy. Although the magnitude of the association is
not large, it is nevertheless noteworthy of attention as it explains about 10%
of the common variance between passionate love and irrationality (12%
when considering the cognitive component of the passionate love).
At least two factors could explain the rather modest magnitude of the as-
sociation between passionate love and irrationality. First, passionate love is
conceptualized as a multidimensional construct, including cognitive, emo-
tional, and behavioral components, while the irrationality measure used in
this study is exclusively cognitive. Therefore, we cannot expect a very high
correlation, as when we would investigate the relationship between two simi-
lar constructs.
Second, it is possible that the relationship between irrationality and pas-
sionate love is more nuanced/complicated, in that one can have a low or
medium general irrationality (as measured with GABS-SV) and a high roman-
tic irrationality (or vice versa). Indeed, it has been suggested that rationality
and irrationality are not bipolar constructs, and can co-exist in the same per-
son when different contents are considered (David, Freeman, & DiGiuseppe,
2010). For example, one can be highly irrational about love-related contents
and less irrational about success-related contents. Alternatively, high general
irrationality could, for example, increase ones susceptibility to become irra-
tional about a romantic relationship, and/or could potentiate romantic irra-
tionality, while low/general irrationality could constitute a protective factor,
undermining romantic irrationality. In conclusion, we believe that the pas-
sionate love field could be suitable for advancing our current understanding
of how different degrees of (ir)rationality interact with each other in generat-
Are We Confusing Passionate Love with Irrationality? | 57

ing dysfunctional feelings/behaviors, and future studies should benefit from
investigating this aspect.
Furthermore, our results seem to suggest that passionate love isnt associ-
ated with rationality, but rather with irrationality, irrespective of its cognitive,
emotional, and behavioral components. Since rationality is viewed as a pro-
tective factor against (emotional) psychopathology, these results strengthen
the possibility that passionate love is, indeed, unhealthy. However, it remains
to be seen in what respect it is unhealthy.
What is interesting in the context of rationality is the lack of an associa-
tion between this concept and the emotional component of passionate love.
According to the binary model of distress (Ellis & Harper, 1975), rational cog-
nitions underlie functional emotions (either positive or negative), while irra-
tional cognitions underlie dysfunctional emotions (either positive or nega-
tive). Could the emotional component of passionate love reflect such a dys-
functional side? Our preliminary data suggest so. Future studies should fur-
ther investigate this possibility. We believe that passionate love could provide
the avenue for advancing our current understanding of functional and dys-
functional emotions.
To sum up, our results suggest that passionate love is most probably un-
healthy. However, it remains to be seen in what respect it is unhealthy. One
possibility is that passionate love could be a vulnerability factor for subse-
quent general distress/romantic distress. Then, if passionate love is un-
healthy, which is the healthy side of romantic love and how can we promote
it? As we employed a cross-sectional design, using a preponderantly female
sample, we cannot draw firm or general conclusions. Predictive and experi-
mental studies are needed before drawing clear inferences about the nature
of passionate love. Nevertheless, we think that the current preliminary inves-
tigation from a cognitive-behavioral model could provide a useful framework
for better understanding the nature of passionate love.


58 | IOANA R. PODIN; LAVINIA USCESCU; CRISTINA MOGOAE
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