HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU

HE ARD YOURSE L F SAYI NG YE S TO THE WRONG THI NGS

OVERWHELMI NG REQUESTS, BAD RELATI ONSHI PS, TI ME- CONSUMI NG
OBLI GATI ONS? HOW OFTEN HAVE YOU WI SHED YOU COULD SUMMON
THE POWER TO TURN THEM DOWN?
A WELL-PLACED NO
CAN NOT ONLY SAVE YOU TI ME AND TROUBL E ,
I T CAN SAVE YOUR LI FE.
NO I S AN I NCREDI BLY PAI NFUL, BRAVE WORD TO SAY. HOW MANY
TI MES HAVE YOU HAD TO SAY NO ONLY TO HAVE I T CAUSE ANGUI SH,
DESPERATI ON, ARGUMENTS, AND ANXI ETY?
BUT YOU HAVE THE RIGHT
TO SAY NO:
TO ANYTHI NG THAT I S HURTI NG YOU. TO STANDARDS THAT NO LONGER
SERVE YOU. TO PEOPLE WHO DRAI N YOU OF YOUR CREATI VI TY AND
EXPRESSI ON. TO BELI EFS THAT ARE NOT TRUE TO THE REAL YOU.
1. SAYING NO TO SOCIAL PRESSURE
THE KE Y TO SAYI NG NO TO THI S PRE SSURE I S ABC
When we wer e chi l dr en we wer e t aught t o be pol i t e, t o be ni ce, and t o say yes at al l of
t he wr ong moment s. Thi s l eads us t o be pr essur ed by col l eagues, i nst i t ut i ons, bosses,
f r i ends, and f ami l y t o at t end t o t hei r needs.
ACKNOWLEDGE WHAT THEY ARE
PRESSURI NG YOU I NTO
Vi ew t hese oppor t uni t i es
as educat i on. Vi ew t hese
obst acl es as ways t o l ear n
how t o gr ow. Wi t hout
l ear ni ng t o say no, you can
never l ear n t o say a t r ue
yes t o you.
I HAVE TO LEAVE I N FI VE MI NUTES.
AFTER A FEW MI NUTES, LEAVE.
2. SAYING NO TO NEGATIVE CHATTER
Somet i mes we get st uck i n negat i ve chat t er t hat becomes a r unni ng comment ar y on our
l i ves, much l i ke a news anchor who onl y t el l s us t he bad news t hat happens al l day l ong.
EXAMPLES OF NEGATI VE CHATTER:
Of t en we beat our sel ves up i n ways i n whi ch we woul d never beat up someone we
l oved. Thi s i s t he wor st f or m of cr uel t y. I t s a dai l y pr act i ce t o r ecogni ze when t hi s i s
happeni ng, and say no.
HOW COULD HE DO THIS TO ME? WHY DOES THAT PERSON LOOK LIKE AN IDIOT? DO I LOOK UGLY?
HOW AM I GOING TO SURVIVE MY JOB TODAY? AM I GOING TO BE ABLE TO PAY THE BILLS?
AND ON AND ON.
3. SAYING NO TO PEOPLE YOU KNOW ARE NOT GOOD FOR YOU
t o al l of t he peopl e who seek t o dr ai n you wi t h r el at i onshi ps t hat go nowher e, or peopl e
who t r y t o cont r ol you or put you down, or peopl e who cheat you or l i e t o you.
YOU WI LL NEVER FI ND YOUR OWN CREATI VE TALENT BY SAYI NG YES
I N THI S AREA I T I S PRETTY BLACK AND WHI TE:
ei t her you ar e suppor t ed by t hose ar ound you, or you ar e dr agged i nt o t he spi r al
dr ai n of t he t oi l et , and of f you go t o some sewer.
4. SAY NO TO JEALOUSY
The r oot s of envy can be anyt hi ng. But I have t o go t o wor k t oday. The one t hi ng I can
choose i s not t o be ashamed of i t . To say, Okay, t hi s i s my chal l enge f or t he day. To
accept i t . And say No.
So t ake i t f or what i t i s: a r oad map t o get your sel f out of pr i son. Jeal ousy i s a gui de t o
what i s goi ng on i nsi de of you. I t s never about t he ot her per son.
MAYBE I FEEL LIKE I CANT BE LOVED UNLESS I HAVE BILLIONS.
OR I LOOK LIKE A MOVIE STAR.
OR I HAVE 20 BESTSELLING BOOKS.
J E AL OUSY I S UNAVOI DABL E
5. SAY NO TO BEING A SLAVE
F OR AL L OF YOUR SL AVI NG AWAY, AL L YOUR BOSS HAS TO SAY I S YOU RE F I RE D AND THAT S THE E ND.
You wake up bef or e dawn. You t r avel . You wor k har d. You come home l at e. You r e
f eel i ng st uck. You r e mi l dl y depr essed and may t ake medi cat i on f or t hi s. And you have
t r oubl e sl eepi ng and di gest i ng.
What di d they do? St udy t he peopl e onl i ne who seem t o have br oken f r ee. What
ar e t hey doi ng? Keep wor ki ng on your i dea muscl e. You do t hi s by wr i t i ng down t en
i deas a day. I t doesn t mat t er what t he i deas ar e. I t doesn t mat t er i f t hey ar e good
or bad. Thi s i s j ust exer ci si ng. Thi s i s physi cal t her apy appl i ed t o t he mi nd so t hat
your i dea muscl e doesn t at r ophy.
STUDY THE LI VES OF PEOPLE WHO AREN T SLAVES.
6. SAY NO TO SUDDEN THOUGHT ATTACKS
I wake up at t hr ee i n t he mor ni ng ever y day. I can t hel p i t . I al most have post -
t r aumat i c st r ess f r om t he many, many t i mes I ve woken up i n a pani c at t hr ee i n t he
mor ni ng t o a f l ur r y of bad t hought s.
LOOKING BACK, NOTHING EVER HAPPENED THAT I PREDICTED AT THREE IN THE MORNING
ILL SAY IT AGAIN: NOTHING I EVER PREDICTED AT THREE IN THE MORNING EVER CAME TRUE. EVER.
SO HERES WHAT I DO NOW, WHICH YOU CAN USE AS AN EXERCISE.
I SAY TO MYSELF, NOTHING I EVER PREDICT AT THREE IN THE MORNING COMES TRUE. IM TIRED NOW AND NEED TO SLEEP.
SAY NO TO THOUGHT ATTACKS, AS THEY RARELY (IF EVER) LEAD TO ANYTHING PRODUCTIVE.
7. SAY NO TO ABUSIVE PEOPLE
I f t he answer i s no, you know you need t o move away f r om t he per son. The key i s not
t o engage. You need t o quar ant i ne t he abusi ve per sons di sease and not l et i t spr ead.
Ot her wi se i t wi l l make you si ck, t oo.
HOW DO I FEEL ABOUT MYSELF WHEN I AM AROUND THIS PERSON?
DO I FEEL GOOD ABOUT MYSELF?
ALWAYS ASK YOURSELF:
8. SAY NO TO BAD LUCK
Sometimes we chase it. Sometimes it teases us. Sometimes we have it for a while.
Somet i mes when we expect a ki ss, i t r uns away i n t he r ai n, l eavi ng us scar ed and l onel y.
WE HAVE A L OVE AF FAI R WI TH LUCK.
Luck i s somet hi ng t hat i s ear ned, and once you have ear ned i t , you wi l l al ways know
how t o get i t back. You wi l l say no t o t he peopl e who t r y t o br i ng you down, who t r y t o
use t hei r own bad l uck t o cont r ol you because t hey can t cl i mb t o your hei ght s.
YOU WILL SAY NO TO THE PEOPLE WHO TRY TO BRING YOU DOWN, WHO TRY TO USE
THEIR OWN BAD LUCK TO CONTROL YOU BECAUSE THEY CANT CLIMB TO YOUR HEIGHTS.
9. SAY NO TO INCOMING NEGATIVE ENERGIES
Peopl e of t en t r y t o pr ovoke us. They want a r esponse. They ar e l onel y and t hey need
us t o be angr y or upset or scar ed or ashamed so t hey won t be as l onel y. And i t s easy
t o f al l i nt o t hei r t r ap. To get sucked i nt o t he vor t ex of negat i vi t y.
THE KEY IS TO NOTICE IT,
NOTICE WHEN IT STARTS TO WELL UP IN YOUR HEAD.
THEN STOP IT. SAY NO TO IT.
10. SAY NO TO SELF-SABOTAGE
Thi nk of your l i f e as a t r ai n st at i on. You ar e on t he pl at f or m and you see
a t r ai n appr oachi ng. You real l y want thi s trai n to be your trai n.
BUT THI S TRAI N I S NOT MEANT TO STOP HERE.
Sensi ng t hat t he t r ai n i s not st oppi ng, you j ump ont o t he t r acks,
t o t he hor r or of al l t he peopl e ar ound you.
Meanwhile, the train that is meant for you, the one that is your train by divine design, is right behind this
one. Only you cannot see this because you are too busy causing unnecessary drama.
To say no t o sel f - sabot age, get out of t he t r ai n t r acks and accept t he f l ow of l i f e. Let
t he t r ai n cont i nue, wi sh i t wel l as i t l eaves, and t r ust t hat your s i s comi ng.
That s al l i t t akes.
11. SAY NO TO AN UNTIMELY DEATH
Of t en we ar e gi ven r eci pes f or success t o get mot i vat ed! t o f i nd pur pose!
Make your t o- do l i st s! Do t hi s! Do t hat ! Take t hese pi l l s and cal l us i n t he mor ni ng!
even i f you t hi nk t hose t hi ngs wi l l i mpr ove your l i f e. Somet i mes i t s
i mpor t ant t o do l ess i n or der t o at t r act abundance.
SOMETI MES I T S I MPORTANT TO NOT DO MORE THI NGS,
DONT DO THINGS THAT WILL CAUSE YOU TO DIE.
THERES A VERY SIMPLE TRICK TO LIVING LONGER. AND IT DOESNT INVOLVE
DOING MORE THINGS. WE ALMOST FEEL SILLY TELLING YOU THIS:
12) SAY NO TO MINDLESS SELFISHNESS
But of t en peopl e t ake t hat expr essi on t o mean t hat you shoul d l i ve l i f e wi t hout car i ng.
That you can do anyt hi ng you want because t omor r ow mi ght not ar r i ve.
Thi nk of someone you l ove. Or many peopl e you l ove. Her es a new sayi ng t o t r y out .
See how t hi s i mpr oves t he i nt er act i ons you have t oday. Tr eat ever yone el se as i f i t s
t hei r l ast day.
Even t hough i t may sound a l i t t l e mor bi d t o i magi ne t hat peopl e ar ound us ar e about t o
di e, i n r eal i t y, t hi s si mpl e mi nd t r i ck hel ps us l et go of t he mi ndl ess sel f i shness t hat
occupi es most of our t hought s.
MANY PE OPL E SAY, L I VE L I F E L I KE I T S YOUR L AST DAY. WE GE T I T.
LEARN TO APPRECI ATE EVERYTHI NG AROUND YOU.
When you pr ot ect your sel f f r om t he peopl e and si t uat i ons t hat wi l l hur t you. When you
shi el d your sel f f r om t he st or i es and myt hs your col l eagues, f r i ends, f ami l y, and i nst i t ut i ons
use t o cont r ol you. When you f i nal l y say no t o t he i nner condi t i oni ng and psychol ogy t hat
your br ai n f or ces on you i n i t s mi sgui ded at t empt s t o pr ot ect you.
The Power of No can f r ee us f r om t he soci et y, t he i nst i t ut i ons, t he f r i ends, l oves,
col l eagues, bosses, and bel i ef syst ems t hat t r i ed t o bui l d a cage ar ound us. Those t hat t r i ed
and st i l l t r y t o cont r ol us.
ITS ANOTHER THING TO HAVE THE POWER OF NO.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: ITS ONE THING TO SAY NO.