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NewSVScore=410points!!!
HegetspointsbecauseoftheIMPACTONHER(notbecauseitjusttoldthestory)
He didn't do it in a corny way like:
The guy: Yeah. . . ever yone I know j ust t el l s me how amazi ngl y
compassi onat e I am.
The woman: ( r ol l s her eyes)
So in terms of the Say +Do formula, he's performing well at the "say" part...
However, a few days later he drives to her house to take her out to lunch.
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Hearing him pull up in his car, she peaks out of her window and sees that he has decided
to first make a brief stop at a lemonade stand that two kids have set up.
Everything seems normal at first, until she observes a lengthy discussion with the two
little kids.
She's curious to what's going on.
Moments later, he knocks on the door and as she lets him in, she inquires about the
lengthy discussion that she observed.
Her : I saw you buyi ng l emonade f r omt hose ki ds. That was sweet .
The Guy: You mean sour . Those l i t t l e bast ar ds wer e aski ng f or 10
cent s a cup. I t al ked t hemdown t o 5. ( gi ggl i ng) . They' r e not
even usi ng r eal l emons. That ' s f ucki ng Kool - ai d ( gi ggl es some
mor e and t hen smacks her on t he ass) .
As you can imagine, in terms of the Say +Do formula, he's not performing too well in
the "do" part...and that negatively impacts his SV Score.
NewSVScore=10points!!!
The Guy: ( cont i nui ng) When me and my boy J i mbo had our l emonade
st and back i n t he day, we use t o squeeze f r esh l emons f or 2
hour s.
NewScore=2points
So in relationships and dating, what you DO matters in addition to what you SAY.
Typically, when guys complain about some sort of problem they are having with their
female partners, they DO what I use to DO:
And that is complain about an undesirable behavior that the woman is displaying without
even thinking for a second that it COULD/MAYBE/POSSIBLY be a result of what he's
doing (or not doing).
For example the woman is being disrespectful to the guy but he doesn't quite understand
how to connect her behavior with some sort of recent (or consistent) action.
There was a college basketball coach on the sports radio station I listen to - and he said
that he learned that he could not treat/discipline the players the same exact way, because
they have different backgrounds, different outlooks and different levels of self-esteem.
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He learned that what works best is when you customize your interaction based on the
uniqueness of the player.
And that's pretty much the same approach that should be applied to women - for the same
reasons.
In many cases, a guy may not be technically doing something wrong -- it's just that he is
dealing with a different woman so he has to adjust.
A great example is at one point, I remember thinking that my girlfriend (now my wife)
had the worst sex drive out of any girl I've ever been with.
It was true at one point.
When you analyze it from a 'sexual tension' +'sexual value' standpoint, what was
happening to me (and this happens to a lot of guys) was I only really had ONE sexual
tension weapon in my arsenal.
Only one!
(And although we're getting off topic a bit, this is pretty interesting because it's so
common.)
And the only weapon I had was: seduction via 'being the new guy' or seduction via 'new
love'...
In other words, the only weapon I had was unfortunately a novelty-based tension
increaser.
Think about that for a second.
Of course, the obvious problem with only using (planned or unplanned) novelty-based
tension increasers is...
Can you guess?
"I think I know this one CR...after a certain period of time, the novelty
wears off and you're a weaponless seductive ninja. And you are then forced
to rely on external events as you're only source of seduction - for example
something like it just so happens that her and a bunch women at work were
talking about crazy sexual positions and she comes home inspired to try
something out..."
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Very good. Couldn't have said it better myself.
In those cases, the guy has to wait for unplanned events to assist him in getting her
aroused.
In some cases, the guy's problem isn't a limited seduction weapons problem - it's the
woman.
Now, I tend to think that you can often find crazy behavior patterns in all woman. And
sometimes part of the "game" is leveraging her craziness (for lack of a better phrase)...
However...
In. Some. Cases.
The. Guy. Is. Dealing. With. A. "Special." Case.
About 3 years ago, I was talking to a guy who said he think he's found his soulmate! And
he said it to me knowing my stance on "magical soulmates" (So I smiled.)
Fast forward 2 months later!
Let's just say his perception of her had shifted a bit (LOL), because he NOW referred to
her as:
"The Wackiest Bitch He's Ever Met!"
His words. Not mine.
Here is one incident that he told me about...
He said they were in the living room sitting on the couch watching a rented movie from
Blockbuster. (Keep in mind, I've been saying for years that certain movies trigger
emotional responses...)
Well this one scene took place that pissed her off so much, that she paused the movie (she
always had to have control over the remote).
While the movie was paused, she looked him square in the eyes and said:
Ifyoueverinyourwildestdreamsthinkaboutdoingsomebullshitlikethatto
ME!!!(pointingatthefrozenmoviescreenwiththeremote)....Iwilltakethe
knifeoutofmypurseandsliceyourmotherfuckingthroat!
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After about 9-13 violent movie pauses of that nature, he would actually feel somewhat
defeated after the movie was over. Even though he never did anything "remotely" (no
pun) close to whatever she was flipping out about, she apparently felt a strong need to
set the record straight.
To me, there is a good tactic for women like that - and it actually allows you to get more
sex in the future. It's called the "this isn't going to work out" technique.
And it's pretty easy to execute.
Although, in most cases, I think the woman's negative behavior towards the guy can be
CURED via making adjustments in:
What you SAY + What you DO
...even though most guys don't ever make the connection.
In fact -- if we were to finish the fictional story with the lemonade guy -- he would
probably end up going on a date with her and after awhile, he would start to experience
(from his perspective) a bi-polarish shift in how she treats him.
After seeing how he treated those kids, she'll end up being slightly distant and possibly
disrespectful to him.
And he won't even know where it came from.
Let's get to the next Strategy Tool.
S St tr ra at te eg gy y T To oo ol l # #3 3
T Th hi ir rd d G Gr ra ad de e: : D Do o + + N No ot t D Do o
The previous lesson was Saying +Doing.
In this case 'Do' refers to 'Doing +Saying' and 'Not Do' Refers to 'Not Doing +Not
Saying'.
But instead of listing this as Do +Say +Not Do +Not Say or (Do +Say) +(Not Do +
Not Say) or [Do +Not Do] +[Say +Not Say]...which is actually more accurate...
I thought it would be best to keep it simple and just go with: Do +Not Do. lol
"Do + Not Do is muuuuuch simpler"
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I agree!
So why is this important - being that it's so obvious. Why is it worth discussing? Is there
more to it than what most people realize?
Yes it's worth discussing.
Yes there's more to it than what most people realize.
I think in general, it's in our nature to label certain things as 'obvious' without connecting
it with our current patterns.
But if something is really obvious and we're not doing it, then obviously there is
something 'missing' that we haven't acknowledged.
For example, the most basic application of Do +Not Do would be to:
St at e a pr obl em==> And t hen t hi nk of ( or wr i t e out ) al l of t he t hi ngs
you can be doing mor e of ( t o f i x i t ) al ong wi t h a l i st of t hi ngs t o Not
Do t hat coul d be cur r ent l y cr eat i ng t he pr obl em.
Of course, people don't default to this sort of method.
When you talk to most people about their problems (in this case: relationship issues),
most people's pattern is:
St at e t he pr obl em==> Tal k about how i t makes t hemf eel and how much
t hey don' t l i ke i t ==> Make some sor t of " I t ' s not f ai r / r i ght
st at ement "
I've done this before.
Scratch that.
I've done it lots of times!
If you've done it at times, too - then it doesn't feel like YOU are doing anything wrong. In
fact, you feel like you're being wronged. And you're just pissed off and you want it to
stop.
Ever felt like that before?
When it comes to the red pattern, the last part is critical, the person always feels as
though it's not fair (right).
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In order to be successful at endless complaining, you have to get really good at making
it's not fair statements.
When you first think of the formula "Do +Not Do", it almost seems like a joke because
it's registers as too obvious.
The reason I think it's worth talking about is because a lot of people aren't too good at
understanding cause and effect.
Most people don't realize that they exist somewhere on a spectrum of 'Being a Victim'
and 'Understanding The Law of Cause and Effect'.
it's not fair cause and effect
If a guy isn't good at understanding cause and effect (especially on an emotional reaction
level) +he has a poor concept of what it takes to get a woman to react a certain way +he
has a victim's mentality, Do + Not Do would be the cure!
...or at least a major part to fixing a lot of his problems.
Complaining is somewhat of a magical process, I think.
Have you ever heard someone complain about something, and immediately you could
work out how he created the situation?
Deep down inside, you knew that he created the situation and you also could pick up on
the fact that he really believed that it wasn't his fault (it's not fair).
Here's the deal, the reason why many people don't snap out of the its not fair mood is
often because they're right on some level!
In some cases: They really are being mistreated!
In some cases: They really are being taking advantage.
You're not inclined to put a lot of effort into fixing a problem when you haven't done
anything wrong.
I thought about this concept when I use to complain about my girlfriend rarely being in
the mood for sex. Looking back, it wasn't as rare as what other guy's are faced with, but
in my mind I was being massively deprived by a selfish girlfriend.
And on some level: I was right!
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From a certain perspective: I was right! It wasn't fair.
Of course, according to the Law of Cause and Effect (you know, that perspective), I was
being an idiot - in terms of focusing on the fact that it's not fair as a strategy for
improving things.
The reality was my sex life (at its worse) was probably a C- but it felt like an F- to me
because I expected to get it whenever I felt like it --- even though I was currently
operating with an F- strategy for building desire (although at the time, I would rate it as a
B+).
In my mind - as I complained - I REALLY felt like it was her responsibility to make sure
she had a healthy sex drive.
...where, healthy sex drive =her panties getting wet just because I said "Let's do it right
now!"
I also remember deciding (as a last resort) to just think about all of the things I could DO
and NOT DO that could improve the situation.
Here's why that was a very weird feeling.
Imagine someone stealing your wallet. And then instead of catching him and punching
him in the face, you opted to write a letter to him apologizing for what you did to create
the situation.
That's how I felt.
That's why Do +Not Do was unnatural for me because my mindset and perspective was
not in alignment with Cause and Effect.
I was a "it's not fair" guy applying "Cause and Effect" methods for the first time.
And it felt weird.
I thought about how if I wasn't quite in the mood and she wanted it, I wouldn't hesitate to
make myself available and give her some. (Classic its-not-fairism thinking - forgetting
that people are different and have different triggers, preferences and patterns.)
After that, I started thinking about all of the things that she did that wasn't fair to me! Of
course, I completely ignored all of the memories when she behaved selflessly and kindly
towards me. (Classic its-not-fairism thinking)
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You can't be a master ninja complainer (or an Its-not-fairist) while thinking of times
when your woman was overly accommodating & selfless...
So when I was thinking of all of the things I could DO and NOT DO to increase the
likelihood that she would want it in the future, it wasn't a natural feeling.
I felt very weak.
It was like writing an apology letter to someone who just stole my wallet - detailing what
I could have done differently (Do +Not Do) to avoid getting it stolen.
As crazy as that may sound, if someone were to actually write a letter to his wallet thief,
he would actually end up learning something and realizing his part in the process.
Again, it's unnatural for people to think like that.
Let's face it, we shouldn't have to go through extreme measures to make sure someone
doesn't wrong us.
However, when you apply this sort of 'extreme take responsibility type of mindset' to
your interactions with women, you are often rewarded with unique insight and the 'core
pieces' to a future brilliant strategy.
So the Do +Not Do will normally be most effective when you're doing it at a time when
most guys would think: This isn't fair!
And to break this concept down - piece by piece - let's look at an example.
For example: Let's say, you two are enjoying the day and at some point she appears to get
really horny, except now isn't a good time so you two make it playfully known that sex
will take place later on tonight. However, when tonight arrives she's cancels because she's
too tired. In your mind, you're thinking "that's not fair" or "I wouldn't do that to her" or
"if you're going to make a plan to do it, then stick to it" or "so you get me all excited
about doing it later on and I'm looking forward to it and then you just cancel on
me?...wow... seriously?"...
Chances are, you're going to feel like it's not fair (because you wouldn't do it)(PLUS,
being teased isn't cool).
In most cases, the last thing on your mind would be to think about what you could have
done differently.
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However, if you're able to analyze the situation (from a perspective of cause and effect)
you might discover that you did some 'brilliant stuff' that worked great to get her to the
point where she was horny about doing it later.
And/or...
You might end discovering a huge turnoff (or a huge 'interaction management' mistake)
to avoid doing in the future - being that she went from 'horny' to 'not interested'.
And it's interesting that we're using this example, because whenever I'm told about stuff
going down later, as a new rule, I just pretend that she is only 20% there. And that I have
still have work to do.
I would advise you to do the same - even if it's on a cruise-control level, where you're
making it a point to navigate the 'playfulness' or whatever type of chemistry is present, as
opposed to saying to yourself 'ok cool we're doing it later' and then letting the sexy fun
interaction fizzle out.
And while we're on the subject, a great seduction structure to use (which works great
once you get the rhythm of it down) is to:
And you might want to do this tonight (or in the next few days)!
(Because it's soooo powerful and simple...)(...and it's a great new seduction weapon to
add to your current arsenal)
(Thank me later!)
There are only 6 steps!
Step 1: Bui l d a l i t t l e bi t of sexual t ensi on
( i . e. a ni ce compl i ment or t al k about a r ecent t i me you t wo had sex or
what ever wor ks)
Step 2: Do a Fut ur e- Based I ni t i at i on ( because dur i ng t i mes when
not t hat much t ensi on has been bui l t , she i s nor mal l y mor e l i kel y
t o be open t o: " maybe i f [ XYZ Condi t i on] , we can do a l i t t l e
somet hi ng l at er on" )
Ment i on some sor t of condi t i on ( i mpor t ant ) and t hen t al k about maybe doi ng
i t l at er .
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Accor di ng t o many soci al exper i ment s, peopl e ar e mor e open t o commi t t i ng t o
a MAYBE. I ' ve t aken i t a st ep f ur t her by r eal i zi ng t hat peopl e ar e even more
open t o commi t t i ng t o a MAYBE t hat has been pushed out i nt o t he f ut ur e.
But agai n: Thi s i s ONLY when t he t ensi on i sn' t t hat hi gh yet , because:
A condi t i on- based " maybe" pushed i nt o t he f ut ur e
WI LL ALAWYS WI N AGAI NST A
" Let ' s do i t r i ght now! ! "
Step 3: [ opt i onal ] Conver t t he maybe t o a yes ( use your
cr eat i vi t y. l ol . But t hi s st ep can be easy and f un because t her e
ar e so many di f f er ent ways - but her e, i t ' s opt i onal . )
Step 4: Bui l d mor e sexual t ensi on.
( I f you don' t know what t o do - at a mi ni mum: gr adual l y i ncr ease l ovi ng
car esses [ nonsexual af f ect i on] + mor e ( r eal l y good) compl i ment s + bei ng
pat i ent and t r ust i ng t he pr ocess of pl ant i ng t he r i ght seeds)
Af r ai d Guys ar e t hi nki ng: " What i f she f i gur es out t he secr et mast er
pl an?! ! ! "
. . .
Skept i cal Guys ar e t hi nki ng: " Does HE act ual l y get r esul t s wi t h
somet hi ng so si mpl e and basi c?"
. . .
Super Humans: " Get t i ng women hor ny i s easy, because get t i ng someone t o
CRAVE ANYTHI NG i s DI RECTLY LI NKED t o an ar t f ul navi gat i on of physi cal
pl easur e and/ or emot i onal pl easur e.
Step 5: I ni t i at e sex.
Step 6: Have sex.
Once you get the rhythm of it down and you have a good track record, the BEST PART
is you'll have a new seduction template that could produce hundreds of variations.
Although we're getting off topic a bit, the point is DO +NOT DO is powerful.
And the above template is a direct result of a several tweaks - some of which were a
result of being turned down.
As a bonus: Once you get success with it, you should be able to have great success
with The Secret Pattern report.
(New)
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But for now, let's focus on the current lesson right...
Imagine for a second that your target woman being so horny that she's grabbing you and
begging you to feed it to her later on. You're smiling on the inside because it's been
awhile since she's been this horny.
And all throughout the day, she's flirting and even talking dirty. But later on, she
suddenly not in the mood.
Most guys would be pissed!
And they should be on some level...
And they also would be thinking it's not fair - How could she did that to me?!
But wouldn't it really be in your best interest to figure out what made her horny in the
first place - and then secondly, think of what you could have done that could have
possibly turned her off.
J ust from that one incident, from a cause and effect (Do +Not Do) perspective, you
might end up learning one of the most powerful things you can Do that would work many
times in the future. And you could also end up learning something powerful to Not Do
anymore.
If that makes sense.
So there you go. I hate to just end abruptly, but I don't have anything else to say...
So that's it for now.
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Asarecap,though...
M Mi in nd ds se et t T To oo ol l # #1 1: : P Pr ro oj je ec ct ti in ng g a a m mi in nd ds se et t o of f e ex xt tr re em me e e ex xp pe ec ct ta at ti io on n
Thoughts ==>Emotional Reaction
When you Control Your Thoughts ==>You Control Your Emotional Reaction
When you Affect Her Thoughts ==>You Affect Her Emotional Reaction
Level 1: Doing things to create the feeling more often (i.e. Read Michael J ordan
quotes (5x per day)
Level 2: Create new ways of reacting to life!
M Mi in nd ds se et t T To oo ol l # #2 2: : P Pr ro oj je ec ct t a a h ha ap pp py y a ab bo ou ut t l li if fe e m mi in nd ds se et t
Being happy is about being strategically positive and understanding how "happy
brain chemicals" gives you a (super human) advantage in life by operating with a
peak IQ and seeing more information in experiences, memories and interactions.
There have been psychological experiments that demonstrate that when a person
believes they have already started something (on a progress level), they become
more motivated to do (continue) it.
Whenever you're trying to fix a problem or maximize success, look at it from a
perspective of I'm already doing it on some level.
Do more green thinking than red thinking.
Red thinking: Why Y is Y?
Green thinking: How to change Y to X? What are the best/fastest/most-likely
ways to change Y to X?
M Mi in nd ds se et t T To oo ol l # #3 3: : P Pr ro oj je ec ct t a an n ' 'I I f fe ee el l l li ik ke e a a n ne ew w p pe er rs so on n' ' m mi in nd ds se et t. .
Your current perception (level of desirability) with every woman you know is
based on 2 steps.
Step 1 - what you do
Step 2 - how it's processed
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That's why to become more desirable, you have DO more desirable things - which
will sometimes involved accelerating/maximizing Step 2 - how it's processed
This can be done by RESETTING the frame via messages/speeches. That way
you're metaphorically pressing the red reset button on her perceptual filters - that
way she gets to see you as THE NEW WAY much quicker.
The basic & simple rule: If you want to be more desirable to the target woman,
Increase The Density of 'sexual value signals' while Reducing The Density of
'anti-seductive signals'
And if you look closely at the 3 mindset tools -- when combined -- they are
designed to give you that I'm Super Unstoppable Feeling.
You can easily give yourself new Super Powers, because:
A Super Power = Doi ng what makes a l ot of sense + somet hi ng most
peopl e ar en' t wi l l i ng t o do
Deciding to be a new person is a great way to send yourself the message that
you're operating with new rules, new standards and new powers.
On a brain processing (efficiency) level, it's easier to use a strategy when you
expect it to work.
S St tr ra at te eg gy y T To oo ol l # #1 1: : F Fi ir rs st t G Gr ra ad de e: : S Se ex xu ua al l V Va al lu ue e + + S Se ex xu ua al l T Te en ns si io on n
Whenthesexlifeisn'tgood(ornonexistent)80%SV+20%ST
Whenthesexlifeisok50%SV+50%ST
Whenthesexlifeisgreat20%SV+80%ST
SV Stuff: Changing behavior, changing how you react to her, sending new
messages, changing patterns, [internally] changing
outlook/standards/beliefs/rules)
ST Stuff: Ways to make her experience pleasure, ways to deny her expected
pleasure, ways to get her to think about or daydream about future pleasure - where
pleasure can be emotional, psychological, physical, etc.)
Zooming-in on SV (Super Attraction Power and other reports)
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Zooming-in on ST (The Secret Pattern, Get Her Horny report and other reports)
(see: http://superpowermedia.com/products/pl3.html) AND/OR: testing new ways
to take SV and ST to new levels
S St tr ra at te eg gy y T To oo ol l # #2 2: : S Se ec co on nd d G Gr ra ad de e: : S Sa ay yi in ng g + + D Do oi in ng g
Solving a relationship (or female interaction) issue should have the structure of:
Figureouttherealreason(s)==>Createastrategybasedonthatreason==>
Performthestrategy.
If a woman displays bi-polarish behavior take a few seconds to think about the
possible source on a DO +SAY level because it could be a result of something
you recently DID and/or SAID -- or -- it could be because women at times do
bi-polarish stuff for no logical reason
Women have different backgrounds, different outlooks and different levels of
self-esteem. Getting specific information about her is a great ongoing game plan.
If a woman threatens to slice your throat, break up with her.
S St tr ra at te eg gy y T To oo ol l # #3 3
T Th hi ir rd d G Gr ra ad de e: : D Do o + + N No ot t D Do o
The green pattern is not so great at getting sympathy, but great at helping you see
how to correct the problem
Green Pattern: State a problem ==>And then think of (or write out) all of the
things you can be doing more of (to fix it) along with a list of things to Not Do
that could be currently creating the problem.
The red pattern is great for getting sympathy. Great for helping you see what she's
doing wrong. BUT - Not so efficient at correcting the problem.
Red Pattern: State the problem ==>Talk about how it makes you feel and
how much you don't like it ==>Make some sort of "It's not fair/right
statement"
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(It may be obvious) Get advice ONLY from friends/people who have great sex
lives.
Super Humans Believe: "Getting women horny is easy, because getting someone
to CRAVE ANYTHING is DIRECTLY LINKED to an artful navigation of
physical pleasure and/or emotional pleasure.
Average Guys Believe: "Getting women horny is hard because they're all wackier
than bats. They're selfish and unpredictable...and they don't make any &%#sense!
Super Humans: Don't complain about things they can't control. Super humans are
sympathetic to flying mammals. And they just focus on patterns and what's
consistent and ways to leverage that observable information (by doing the obvious
that most guys aren't willing to do) because they know that:
She wants to be a good person.
She just wants to have fun, laugh and giggle.
She just wants to enjoy the pleasures of life.
Take care!
Best Regards,
CR J ames
crjames.com
Creator of:
http://SuperSeductionPower.com
http://SuperRespectPower.com
http://SecretPattern.com
http://SuperInteractionPower.com (New)
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