2. His passport requires no photograph 3. When he drives a car off the lot, its price increases in value 4. Once a rattlesnake bit him, after 5 days of excruciating pain, the snake finally died 5. His 5 de Mayo party starts on the 8th of March 6. His feet don't get blisters, but his shoes do 7. He once went to the psychic, to warn her 8. If he were to punch you in the face you would have to fight off a strong urge to thank him 9. Whatever side of the tracks he's currently on is the right side, even if he crosses the tracks he'll still be on the right side 10. He can speak Russian... in French 11. He never says something tastes like chicken.. not even chicken 12. Superman has pijamas with his logo 13. His tears can cure cancer, too bad he never cries 14. The circus ran away to join him 15. Bear hugs are what he gives bears 16. He once brought a knife to a gunfight... just to even the odds 17. When he meets the Pope, the Pope kisses his ring 18. His friends call him by his name, his enemies don't call him anything because they are all dead 19. He has never waited 15 minutes after finishing a meal before returning to the pool 20. If he were to visit the dark side of the moon, it wouldn't be dark 21. He once won a staring contest with his own reflection 22. He can kill two stones with one bird 23. His signature won a Pulitzer 24. When a tree falls in a forest and no one is there, he hears it 25. He once got pulled over for speeding, and the cop got the ticket 26. The dark is afraid of him 27. Sharks have a week dedicated to him 28. His ten gallon hat holds twenty gallons 29. No less than 25 Mexican folk songs have been written about his beard 30. He once made a weeping willow laugh 31. He lives vicariously through himself 32. His business card simply says 'I'll Call You" 33. He once taught a german shepherd how to bark in spanish 34. He bowls overhand 35. In museums, he is allowed to touch the art 36. He is allowed to talk about the fight club 37. He once won a fist fight, only using his beard 38. He once won the Tour-de-France, but was disqualified for riding a unicycle 39. A bird in his hand is worth three in the bush 40. His lovemaking has been detected by a seismograph 41. The Holy Grail is looking for him 42. Roses stop to smell him 43. He once started a fire using only dental floss and water 44. His sweat is the cure for the common cold 45. Bigfoot tries to get pictures of him 46. Werewolves are jealous of his beard 47. He once turned a vampire into a vegetarian 48. He once won the world series of poker using UNO cards 49. He never wears a watch because time is always on his side 50. He has taught old dogs a variety of new tricks 51. He has won the lifetime achievement award... twice 52. If opportunity knocks, and he's not at home, opportunity waits 53. Batman watches Saturday morning cartoons about him 54. When he was young he once sent his parents to his room 55. He once had an awkward moment, just to see how it feels 56. His beard alone has experienced more than a lesser mans entire body 57. His blood smells like cologne 58. On every continent in the world, there is a sandwich named after him. His hands feel like rich brown suede 59. Mosquitoes refuse to bite him purely out of respect 60. He is fluent in all languages, including three that he only speaks 61. Once while sailing around the world, he discovered a short cut 62. Panhandlers give him money 63. When he goes to Spain, he chases the bulls 64. His shadow has been on the 'best dressed' list twice 65. When he holds a lady's purse, he looks manly 66. Two countries went to war to dispute HIS nationality 67. When in Rome, they do as HE does 68. His pillow is cool on BOTH sides 69. The Nobel Academy was awarded a prize from HIM 70. While swimming off the coast of Australia, he once scratched the underbelly of the Great White with his right han 71. He taught Chuck Norris martial arts 72. Time waits on no one, but him 73. Once he ran a marathon because it was "on the way" 74. His mother has a tattoo that says "Son" 75. The star on his Christmas tree is tracked by NASA 76. Presidents take his birthday off 77. His recipe for deviled eggs involves actual witchcraft 78. He has never walked into a spider web 79. He is left-handed. And right-handed 80. His shirts never wrinkle 81. The police often question him, just because they find him interesting 82. His organ donation card also lists his beard 83. He doesnt believe in using oven mitts, nor potholders 84. His cereal never gets soggy. It sits there, staying crispy, just for him 85. Respected archaeologists fight over his discarded apple cores 86. Even his tree houses have fully finished basements 87. His garden maze is responsible for more missing persons than the bermuda triangle 88. If he were to say something costs an arm and a leg, it would 89. Hes never lost a game of chance 90. He is the life of parties that he has never attended 91. He was on a recent archaeological dig and came across prehistoric foot prints that lead out of Africa into all parts of the world. On close inspection, it turned out that the prints were his 92. He once caught the Loch Ness Monster.with a cane pole, but threw it back 93. His wallet is woven out of chupacabra leather 94. He played a game of Russian Roulette with a fully loaded magnum, and won 95. Freemasons strive to learn HIS secret handshake 96. If he was to pat you on the back, you would list it on your resume 97. He is considered a national treasure in countries hes never visited 98. Cars look both ways for him, before driving down a street 99. He once tried to acquire a cold just to see what it felt like, but it didnt take 100. He has inside jokes with people hes never met.