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Nicole Amador
Mr. Ritivoiu
English 102
8 May 2014

Boys will be Boys and Girls will be Girls
Due to the differences between male and female brains, men
and women need to learn how to communicate more effectively
with each other to keep unity in whatever environment they
are.
Have you ever wondered why men and women think
differently? Maybe you have heard people say that mens
brains are like boxes and girls are like spaghetti. Since
men and womens brains are wired differently, it can be
difficult to communicate with one another. Men and women
need to learn how to communicate more effectively with each
other to keep unity in whatever environment they are.
God, from the Beginning made us differently, for the
soul purpose that we have specific roles that He needs us
to play. In the Bible it does not say he created just male
or just female. No, He created male and female. And they
were to help each other. God gave the man and woman
different jobs as well. To the man he gave to be the
protector, provider, and leader of the home. To the woman
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he gave to be a mother, helper, and nurturer. So even from
the beginning God gave different roles to each one. God
made us differently for a purpose and because of that He
wired are brains differently to fit the part he wanted us
to play. We are different yet equal in Gods sight.
The definition of wiring is a system of wires
providing electric circuits for a device or building. It
also can be defined as the structure of the nervous system
or brain perceived as determining a basic or innate pattern
of behavior. The difference between male and female brains
is the wiring. Men and womans brain do not look
different; if you were to pick up a brain you would not be
able to tell the difference between the two. Researchers
have found that men and womens brains are wired
differently.
The connections in a typical males brain, run between
the front and the back on the same side of the brain,
whereas a the connections in a female brain run from side
to side between the left and right hemisphere of the brain.
There is a difference between the way guys and girls brain
develops. Girls have stronger neural connectors creating
better listening skills, they also have more detailed
memory storage, and better discrimination among the tones
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of voice. (Gurian, M. & Stevens, K.With Boys and Girls in
Mind, Educational Leadership, Nov. 2004. Pg.2)
Also, girls have 15% more blood flow than boys.
Additionally, a girls prefrontal cortex develops faster
than a boys. By adolescence, a girls corpus callosum is
25 percent larger than a boys. The corpus callosum is the
bundle of nerves that sends signals across the two parts of
the brain. (Gurian, M. & Stevens, K.With Boys and Girls
in Mind, Educational Leadership, Nov. 2004. pg.2)
This allows them more cross talk between hemispheres.
Because of the greater cross talk, girls are able to
multitask. Thus, girls are better at verbal communication
and memory than boys are. (McBride, Bill Girls Will Be
Girls and Boys Will Be Boys).
Boys on the other hand use a different part of the
brain, which is not so strong such as the hippocampus
and amygdala. Guys are good at map reading, and are
devoted to spatial-mechanical functioning, and are not
so strong with the verbal. The male brain is designed
to go into rest states in which it renews, recharges,
and reorients itself. Girls do this without going to
sleep. Boys have less serotonin and less oxytocin,
which makes them more impulsive and less likely to sit
still to talk to someone.
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Boys are also more likely to do dangerous and risky
activities. Fight or flight which is triggered by the
dangerous and risky activities giving boys a charge
that they find irresistible. Boys also overestimate
their ability, while girls tend to underestimate
ability. (qtd. in MALE AND FEMALE DIFFERENCES IN
CONFLICT ).

As previously stated, girls have more blood to the brain
than boys do. Boys have less blood flow to the brain and
Tend to structure or compartmentalize learning.
The more words a teacher uses, the greater chance a
boy will quit listening. Boys brains are better
suited to symbols, abstractions, and pictures.
Consequently, boys generally learn higher math and
physics better than girls. Boys prefer video games for
the physical movement and destruction. And boys get
into more trouble for not listening, moving around,
sleeping in class, and incomplete assignments.
(qtd. in MALE AND FEMALE DIFFERENCES IN CONFLICT).
Growing up, boys are taught to work with there hands.
Even their toys teach boys to work with their hands that
include cars, Lincoln logs, building model cars or planes
and Legos. Boys toys have to do with repairing, building,
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etc., while girls toys have a lot to do with nurturing,
such as making a good home, preparing a meal or taking care
of dolls. From a young age, boys and girls were taught that
they have different roles.
Communication between the different sexes can be very
interesting from the speech, games, verbal and nonverbal
communication.
Inter-sex communication can be very interesting and
complicated because of differences in communication
styles. Whether the cross-sex relationship shared is
romantic, a friendship, or a co-worker, the manner of
communication will most likely differ in numerous
ways. Men and women develop differently, both
biologically and socially during early childhood,
causing conflicting actions. How do men handle
conflict in comparison to women?
(qtd. in MALE AND FEMALE DIFFERENCES IN CONFLICT).
We grow up in a gendered society that guides our
understanding of gender and shapes our personal gendered
identities. (Wood pg.4)
As young people we are forming new ideas on life and who we
are suppose to be and act by observing. Woods says that men
and women grow up differently.
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Males grow up learning that the following elements are
essential to masculinity: do not be female, be
successful, be aggressive, be sexual, be self-reliant,
embody and transcend traditional views of masculinity
(Wood, 2011). Inversely, females learn that appearance
is important, showing sensitivity and care is a must,
negative treatment by others is to be expected,
superwoman abilities are anticipated, and there is no
single meaning of feminine.
(qtd. in MALE AND FEMALE DIFFERENCES IN CONFLICT).
Children grow up learning different ways to play, express
emotions, and communicate with others. If people understand
this, it would be expected that they understand each other.
But that is not the case.
According to Wood (2011), boys games are competitive,
have clear goals, involve physically rough play, and
are organized by rules and roles that specify who does
what and how to play, while girls games lack the use
of rules and guidelines and rather focus on
relationships.(pg.5)
(qtd. in MALE AND FEMALE DIFFERENCES IN CONFLICT).
Guys and girls have different rules when playing games.
Guys games involve, participation in large groups with
less one-on-one communication, while girls participate in
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small groups focusing on talking one-on-one. In many
scenarios, the reasons why men and women dont get along is
that the opposite sex thinks that the woman or man should
think and communicate the way that they do. Although this
is not the case, it will often be seen in conflicts.
There was a research study done by Wood in 2011, which
discussed characteristics of the feminine and masculine
speech. There were some very important aspects of female
communication revolving around the relationships with
others.
Feminine communication styles include establishing
equality, supporting others, promoting participation,
responsiveness, being personal and disclosing
information, and tentativeness.
Females are concentrating on learning about their partners
communication. Masculine speech is different:
[It] is geared more toward accomplishing concrete
goals, exertion of control, and perseverance of
independence, entertaining, and enhancing status. Men
use communication to develop a higher status among
peers by accomplishing instrumental objectives,
communicating on command, being direct and assertive,
abstractness, and no emotional response.(qtd. in MALE
AND FEMALE DIFFERENCES IN CONFLICT).
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In non-verbal communication males and females are quite
different. According to Wood, females surpass the males in
reading non-verbal communication and are usually correct,
while men tend to take up individual space. Women tend to
be quieter and keep to themselves. In Sullivans study, he
found that females exchanged more nonverbal messages
overall, but they also displayed quite different nonverbal
behaviors than males (p. 123).
Regarding relationship, men and women differ greatly.
Wood discusses that the males have the inability to express
themselves in relationships. He suggests that masculine
socialization causes men to be hesitant in sharing their
feelings, which limits their capability to practice
emotional talk. But both females and males look for
different qualities in their significant other.
However, there may be some issues that exist in the cross-
gender relationships because men and women value different
aspects of communication. For Example: According to
Eldridge et al., research on [demand-withdraw theory]
continually demonstrates that women are more often in the
challenging role and men are more often in the withdrawing
role meaning that women seek communication while men
struggle in contributing to the conversation.
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Researchers have found that wives are more demanding
and that the husbands are more likely to withdraw which
causes issues in the relationship. The hypothesis suggests
women are often more demanding because men are more easily
satisfied than women. With all of this, it is hard to
communicate differences and positive messages to one
another, but it is even harder in times of depression.
According to Sullivan in (2004) it states that there are
important differences among the sexes in areas: such as
self-disclosure, anger, and nonverbal communication.
Sullivan also explains that males like to argue and
communicate anger more than females do. Females are
hesitant to express aggression and anger. Males view this
as acceptable behavior and therefore males engage in more
aggressive interactions than women. It was also found that
male athletes are more likely to communicate anger and be
confrontational. But they also found that males and females
express the same manners in moments of anger. Another
research study done by Kinney et al. (2001) suggested the
idea that power affects the way a male or female may handle
their emotions.
While women tend to display more powerlessness with
the display of their emotions, men display more power.
In this research they found that openly admitting
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one's sadness, fear, and disappointment, and openly
crying can be seen as clear signs of powerlessness,
whereas yelling or calling names is assumed to reflect
a motive to maintain or regain power (2001). (Kinney
et al 8). (qtd. in MALE AND FEMALE DIFFERENCES IN
CONFLICT).
Men are more prone to anger than women are, since
women tend to repress their feelings more. Womens anger
tends to be experienced and expressed in unplanned and
often self-defeating ways, including exhaustion,
depression, and so on.
Men and women brains are different they think, speak, and
act differently. Learning how to communicate with each
other is very important because if we do not, there will
not be unity in the family, marriage, classroom, etc.