Katarina Blai

Once upon a time

All fairytales begin with these words, leading us to the world of far away places, where
good prevails and people live happily ever after. Growing up we realie that neither
!rince "harming e#ists nor will we inherit a $ingdom behind the seven seas. %nstead of
mourning over our un&ust destinies we should ta$e a loo$ around and see the not so
magnificent stories around us and their central characters. 'rue life is what we yearn for
and it is only true people who write history.
(y grandmother )&ubica Blaic has witnessed history for *+ years. Born in Bal&evac,
now Bosnia and ,eregovina, she had to grow up before she even $new what it was to be
a child. ,er father remarried only two months after her mother died of tuberculosis.
-oon, besides her brother, Ante, four more girls were brought into the world. her half/
sisters Ana, Olga, (ir&ana and 0ragica. ,er brother, being the only son and thus the
darling of the family, had some privileges, li$e all the men in the village. )&uba, being a
girl, had to wor$ twice as much as men, not only ta$ing care of the cattle and doing field
wor$ but also doing every 1female tas$2 in the house. 3ithout any medical care,
vaccines or drugs, with a poor diet, no toilet in the house and constant wor$, life wasn2t
easy for a young person. Although hard to imagine, she and her friends sang whenever
they could, made rag dolls and invented all sorts of games, trying to ta$e from life
anything it would give them. )&uba e#plains that parents were authorities you had to
obey. -he and her siblings were afraid of their father who never showed any affection to
them. We just had to be tough, she concludes, saying it was the only way to survive.
3hen spea$ing of love and tender feelings, romances had to stay secret. ,olding hands
or $issing in public was a disgrace, something that would mar$ you forever. -he recalls a
girl in her village being $illed because of infidelity. Another man was $illed because he
was standing out when it came to wealth and education.
Brutal as the times were, the worst was yet to come, 3orld 3ar 4. I remember the first
night clearly. We heard some noise, people were shouting and we saw houses, barns and
hay burning. (y grandmother spent nights in basements not $nowing whether she would
survive to see the ne#t day. Armies came and left, being replaced by new ones. 'he
Germans and "hetnic$s moved in their home, leaving them only two small rooms. -he
witnessed a man being $illed in her living room, and although she clearly remembers
everything, she doesn2t wish to bring bac$ those pictures into mind. ,er father was in the
!artisans, but never wanted to spea$ of those times.
-he saw dead people lying everywhere since the armies had no time to bury them.
3al$ing ne#t to corpses while bullets fly over you became usual. !eople weren2t
shoc$ed anymore, not even scared, they &ust wanted it to stop. 3hen it finally came to an
end, terror entered people2s homes, as everyone was afraid of everyone and everything.
'he O56A 78ugoslav secret police9 wanted answers, even when there was nothing to
confess.
On the bright side, ten/year/old )&uba started going to school after the great war had
ended. 'he school in Bal&evac was bombed during the war since it was a German
warehouse, so children couldn2t attend it. Kids of different age went to the same class,
had no boo$s or noteboo$s and their teacher wasn2t :uite educated. 'hey had to learn
everything in school, since they were e#pected to wor$ aftter classes.
)&uba had only four years of elementary school. I went to high school with kids who had
8 years of elementary school and I managed to fit in with them in a matter of months.
-he went to Borovo, near ;u$ovar, to learn a craft. After classes, she went to the factory
to practice because she had to $now all the steps in shoema$ing. It was hard, smelly,
dangerous, polluted, but it was better than going back home. -he met her husband,
)&ubisa in the factory she was wor$ing in after finishing school. -he says she didn2t li$e
him in the beginning, but they used to spend so much time together that she eventually
fell in love with him. I always fantasized about a family, about children, so I was quite
happy when my dreams came true. (y grandparents had three children, my father
(laden, my aunts (ir&ana and (iomira, the former having died in <==>. )&uba says that
the biggest responsibility she had in life was rising and ta$ing care of her children. -he
ran the household and was the head of the family since my grandfather didn2t do the
house chores. -he smiles when she tal$s about him and then e#plains to me that he went
to Germany in order to get a higher education. 'he two of them started their own
company which had more than 4>> wor$ers and was :uite successful. After moving to
6is she was a record $eeper &ust to become an accountant several years before retiring. I
wasnt qualified for the job, but knew how to do it better than the people who were.
?nli$e her husband, she never &oined the "ommunist party although she believes she
could have been more successful if she did. -he li$es to remember 'ito, admitting the
people had no idea how he was running the state. 'he only thing she $nows is that life
became better for the poor. 'he state gave her and )&ubisa an apartment and they were
able to afford a car. 'hey were one of the first people in their neighbourhood to buy a
';. 'hat was in the <=@>s and they were totally amaed. ,aving only one channel, the
'; didn2t stop to amae them and their friends who visited them whenever they could,
&ust to ta$e a glimpse at the 1magical bo#2.
3hen it comes to other sources of entertainment, she recalls dances she used to go to.
,er eyes spar$le as she describes the platform on which they danced all night, en&oying
the real orchestra that played. )aughing, she adds they had no coffee shops.
-he ends the story of her childhood and youth e#plaining that no matter how hard it was
from time to time, she tries to remember everything she had learned that made her the
person she is today.
?nli$e a princess from a fairytale, my grandmother has not only witnessed history, she
made it. -he lost her child and husband and wal$ed a long and uneasy &ourney to the
place she is today. -he never stopped fighting, not when pictures of utter horror emerged
in front of her, not when she was on her own, not even when her most beloved left her.
Aor that, you have to be more than a princess.