John Rommel B.

de Robles Eng 2 W-1R December 12, 2013

A lot of thoughts gather up within the mind of a simple local. Determining if what he does justifies these thoughts is rather tough. The acts of a person do not easily determine his motive in doing so. A reason for which judgment, inclines those who do things out of abstract intention. Sad to say, it is mostly those altruistic efforts which are put into damnation because of questionable behavior.

The strike of the natural calamity, typhoon Yolanda, opened up the opportunity of foresighting the state when measures and changes would not be done in the latter. Moreover, it is an occurrence which displayed the characteristics of what people seemingly forgot to be the most substantial in humanity: sympathy. Though, as much as it is heart-warming to know that aid is being brought to the incapacitated, reports of egoistic performances also rise up. The tendency of which is to abuse the resources which comes from the Philippine locality. Thus, making it difficult to be assured on whom to rely on which, I may say, is the main argument of the impeding development in the nation.

Society naturally was a group of individuals having commonality in what they are passionate about, leaning towards one another in times of seasonal or everyday misfortune. Just imagining what goes on a native tribe sums it all up. With that in mind, why do you think people nowadays are less emotionally attached less sensitive; less alive? The widening exploit of human knowledge and territory, awareness in the surrounding environment, concludingly, is inversely proportionate to affection and emotion. Just like when someone is in need. Knowing there are others who are conscious and capacitated to help, you deem yourself less responsible in the scenario.

Day by day, you forget to talk, move, eat and do things like humans. It is a fact that the functioning body part, the brain, was entwined to your specie, equipping the kind, the optimal condition and performance to think about a variety of stuffs. But with that, the ability to weep, smile, laugh, and love. Let us not end up like machines. You have a life. Make the best of it.

-observe proper organization of ideas -there are too many topics covered ranging from abstract ideas like sympathy and love which could have been concretized through detail and citation of recent references to which the audience can relate to

Events characterizing the need of assistance, for instance, the strike of the natural

calamity, super typhoon Yolanda paved the way to acts of altruism as well as those of

preconceived judgment. Although aids are being brought forth by the authorities in such case,

they are rather questioned than merely accepted to be implementing their roles in the society. Consequently, what seems to be a trust issue in the management was induced by the recent pork barrel scam, amounting to a lost about 840 million pesos in the Philippine funds according to

Patria (2013).

Super typhoon Yolanda, Haiyan for foreign nations, hit the Philippines with winds of 195

mph and gusts up to 235 mph on land, and generated waves 30 to 40 feet high and storm surge of

10 to 20 feet. It was a disaster which no one foresighted to occur, but something to rationally

expect due to the ongoing increment of wasted resources and devastated ecological

environment. Indeed, it was a heart-warming response as people, corporations, and states of

same and varying races helped out those who had and are currently suffering because of the

tragedy. Though pleasing to know as it is, there lies an ostensibly inescapable occurrence of

sleaze. The cause which led to reasonably low reliability to the government, therefore somewhat

impeding the stability of the primary needs of people affected, especially in Tacloban.

Throughout the nation, numerous auxiliaries provide for the necessities of people in the

vicinity of the catastrophe. Though distribution of such help are monitored and controlled by the

management allegedly corrupting a substantial number of economic finance, the aids of people to

those experiencing hardships continue to flow. Observably, the aftermaths of the super typhoon

are quite disastrous. Nonetheless, the effects of anarchic governance are way catastrophic.

Natural calamities only endanger the physical well-being of an individual within their range. However, fraudulent governance depicts the times of dark ages. Plato once said, There will be

no end to the troubles of states, or of humanity itself, till philosophers become kings in this

world, or till those we now call kings and rulers really and truly become philosophers, and political power and philosophy thus come into the same hands. The problem lies not with the

leader, but with the members of the state. A democratic setting provides the citizens to

accumulate power, thus making them able to appoint someone worthy of responsibility. If a

locality would like to inhabit a decent state, they need to think.

overall comment:

1. Strive for cohesiveness and smooth flow of your writing

2. Though this is free-writing, one must observe that the whole is as important as its parts. No

matter how good the sentences are, you will still fail if you failed to reiterate your stand and

your points to the reader. Be intentional, and never subliminal. Strike your points head-on as if

you are trying to prove a point actively. :D

References: Patria, K. (2013, September). By the numbers: pork barrel scam. Retrieved from http://ph.news.yahoo.com/pork-scam-infographics-090326962.html Strzempko, A. (2013, November). The strength of super typhoon Haiyan. Retrieved from http://www.wwlp.com/weather/us-wx-news/the-strength-of-super-typhoon-haiyan