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DB This shalt Not Be! "
BY DAVID TRYON
JESUS HAD JUST been te1ling His disciples that He must go to
Jerusalem and suffer and die. Peter did not approve of this sort
of talk at all. "Be it far from Thee, Lord," he exclaimed, " this
shall not be unto Thee !" It was then that Jesus told His
disciples, " If any man will come after Me, let him deny
himself, and take up his cross and follow Me. For whosoever
will save his life shall lose it. ... "
When He said that, He was stating an inexorable and in-
escapable law of Christian life and progress. No single one of
us can escape it, though it is a law which everyone of us, at
some time or other, wants to escape. We have great plans for
our Christian lives, as Peter had for His Master. And when the
shadow of the cross comes anywhere near us, instinctively we
react as Peter did, " Be it far from me; this shall not be unto
me". And we try to 'save our lives', protecting ourselves,
clinging to our plans, holding on to our reputation, our opinion
of ourselves, our pitiful little superiorities, our rosy picture of
the Christians we intend to be. We really believe that the way to
"Life", the full Christian living which we seek, lies that way.
Yet isn't it true that again and again we seem to come to the
very threshold of a fuller Christian life; we see it so clearly, yet
some:how we do not get there.
Why is it that we are continually frustrated? What is this hard,
apparently impassable barrier which seems to block our way to
the life for which we long? I think I know what it is. It is this
law that "whosoever will save his life shall lose it". In our
efforts to be 'keen' Christians we hurl ourselves against that
law; we weary ourselves, and bruise and break ourselves, and
bring ourselves to despair against that law. And when we have
recovered a bit, we try again, quite sure that by saving our lives
we shall find Life.
Saving our Lives
Only Jesus by His Spirit can teach us the truth about all this.
To know it merely with our minds will do us little good. We
need to find out in experience the meaning of ~that only by
losing our lives shall we find Life. And let us be clear about it.
To find the true way into Life will mean the complete reversal
of the way we were going about it before. That is a thing
which 'flesh and blood' cannot accomplish. Only the Holy
Spirit can show us, and lead us in, that path.
What does it mean to "save our lives"? It means to say, "No,
this shall not be unto me ", when the shadow of the crass
draws near. It is how we react to the coming of the. cross
which decides whether we shall lose our lives or find them.
What does the cross mean? It means being hurt, and it means
dying. Am I determined that I shall not get hurt? Do I resent or
run away from everything which might
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cause me discomfort or pain? Am I determined that I shall not
die, that is, that at any cost I am going to save my reputation,
my plans, my self-importance, my opinion of myself, and all
the rest? If so, I am trying to save my life, and Jesus
says I shall lose it.
Outward Signs
What are the outward signs in a life which is saving itself?
Their name is Legion! One is a spirit of grumbling and self-
pity. Another is a continual attempt to justify oneself, resenting
criticism. Another is holding on to past resentments, never
forgetting a slight, or an unkind word or act. Another is an
attempt to depreciate others, their characters and their
accomplishments, so that the one who criticizes may appear
bigger by comparison! Another is refusing responsibility which
ought to be accepted; an unreal , humility' which will not risk
the hurt to pride which would follow failure. Another is the
drawing attention to one's own good deeds ~very casually and
self-effacingly, of course ~but doing it none the less! Another is
being swayed by one's moods and feelings. Another is a
desperate attempt to keep one's hands on circumstances and
affairs, whether in one's own life or the lives of others, even
using one's prayer time to try to persuade the Lord to accept
one's point of view! One side of this is a resentment of
interruptions or alterations in one's plans, or of people who do
not act as one would wish.
Dying to Live
While these and similar things characterize our lives, however
keen and zealous our Christian service, we may be sure that we
are trying to 'save our lives', and the law of which Jesus spoke
will operate inexorably to keep us out of Life. What is the
alternative? The alternative is to let Him bring about for us a
complete reversal of this way of living, teaching us gently the
meaning of the cross, of losing our lives rather than saving
them. He will teach us how we may die to self-pity, and self-
justification, to all resentments, past and present, to the
enjoyment of feeling big at the expense of making others look
small. We shall learn to die to our moods and feelings, our plans
and programmes. And we shall learn how to welcome every
unpleasant thing which before we resented, welcome them as
His way of bringing the Cross to bear upon our lives. And then
we shall find that our bruised and battered and broken spiritual
lives are being gently lifted through the open door of His Cross
into the borders of that Resurrection Life which He is calling us
to share with Him.
Particulars of other helpful leaflets and booklets in this series
can be obtained direct from: Mr. D. Tryon, Northfields,
Stamford, Lincolnshire, England.