Essays

Know Yourself
Let me begin with an adage probably as old as civilization itself: Treat others as you want them to treat you. Why is that saying important? Further, who are you and what does it mean to know yourself? The answer to the first question if we dont treat others as we want to be treated, if we have double-standards allowing us to expect more than we are willing to give, then something surely will go wrong somewhere, at sometime, with some one. Though we will refer back to the first question, the second questionWhat does it mean to know oneself? will receive more direct attention. And, how we answer it has very much to do with the ethics of relationship. There once lived a man named Socrates who taught Plato, who in turn taught Aristotle. Socrates said, Know yourself; know your own self. Whether the statement originated with him or not, I dont know. Perhaps not. But this I do know: Without deep understanding of ourselves minus illusions and self-deceptions and wishful thoughts, we will not encounter the real us and will likely remain unfulfilled as women and men because too much stays unknown, too much falsified, too much hide-and-go-seek with the outside world, and not enough authentic honesty. Whatever we do and however well or poorly we play out the drama of our own lives, intellectually we probably agree that stability means more than chaos, harmony more than pandemonium, justice more than prejudice and inequality, acceptance more than rejection, and mercy more than indifference. Healthy societies and individuals try to achieve the better and to rid themselves of the worse. There exists a variety of vocational pursuits and most of them can help us grow towards self-understanding and social awareness. Countless human stories tell tales of success or failure in human connectedness. When the curtain falls, what will be said of you? So you would do well to consider what knowing yourself and doing the right thing mean. Why discuss the need for self-knowledge? Because healthy individuals do not happen unless one reaches outside self and self-understanding. If you will pardon an oversimplification: Whatever else society is, always it is a collection of individuals. If too many individuals do not know themselves, neither do the societies in which they live know themselves, whether that society or social group is as small as a family or as large as a nation. Self-knowledge makes mature, effective relationships possible; it also provides for peace, fairness, and stability. I came upon three interesting Chinese words:Ping, An, and Ho. Ping signifies equality where no one seeks to dominate another; An represents a woman under a roof, suggesting that peace obtains when homes are unmolested and tranquil; and Ho depicts a mouth and grain, implying that peace comes when everyone has sufficient to eat. If we want to know ourselvesreally know ourselveswe will know of our own yearnings to

experience peace and justice in a life full of relationships. These three Chinese words attempt to convey this wisdom. Peace, like justice, creates right relationships between and among human beings. These relationships require conscientious labor, just as harvests cannot be reaped without sowing and cultivation. I remember looking at a picture of Aristotle, an intellectual giant of Greece whose teachings flourished three hundred years B.C.E. (Before the Common Era). We see him contemplating a bust of the Greek poet, Homer, who lived and wrote six hundred years before that, or almost three thousand years ago. No less interesting, the artist himself, Rembrandt, speculating on the two of them. My point being, knowledge of self remains incomplete until we move outside the self. That movement sociologists call sociological imagination. To use Rembrandts painting to put this thought across may be a stretch; however, it remains a masterpiece of contemplation reaching outward. But do remember this: Self-understanding comes about as we turn outward to the world, to a world of others, not by turning inward or by limiting our concerns to the few we care about. Selfknowledge happens through relationship, particularly through just, respectful, and kindly relationships. Let me suggest three ways we perceive ourselves. A minute ago, I referred to sociological imagination. Two other imaginations, or modes of thinking, lead towards self-knowledge. One begins earlier and one later, though the three remain ongoing in healthy, evolving lives. It all may sound terribly academic, but in fact it is not. Psychological imagination happens first, then sociological imagination, and finally, spiritual or philosophical imagination. You may wonder what these terms mean and what I mean when I say imagination. I am referring to modes, or ways, of studying ourselves. First, we have ego, the self, ones distinct individuality. Children struggle with whom they are in an ever-enlarging, strange, and often frightening world. Scholars have written volumes about the development of the ego. However, for now, I want you to fix upon the idea of self-awareness, or to fix upon that which provides the base upon which selfknowledge sits. Before anything else significantly evolutionary or developmental takes place in the ego, we first wonder: Who am I? Where am I going? And, what does it all mean? We imagine; we dream; we struggle; we decide; we do; we become aware of self. We think about self, and as we grow thoughts change and deepen. Thus, psychological imagination. Yet, to increase self-knowledge and to comprehend more fully ego we must journey beyond self and move outside the walls of the I and the Me. Second, we are not alone. We come upon a world of others, knowable others, strange and vastly different and even terrifying others. We discover a world alive with others. And we begin to ask new questions:
Who am I in relation to all these others? With whom ought I to relate?

From whom should I remain apart? How should I relate to the world; do I have to? Indeed, What will become of me?

We think about these questions and as we grow our answers change. We ponder what it means to be more than a self and part of a whole, part of a world much larger and more formidable than egos can hope to manage. After that, for better or worse, we move out into the great out there hoping for the best. We try to belong and to seek our identities through the relationships we form. The wiser and more diligent find that knowledge of self expands as knowledge of others expands. This is the meaning of the German phrase, Sein ist Mitsein (To be is to be with). By understanding society and others we increase self-knowledge. Whether we approve or not, we are caught up in the living-space and living-time we occupy. But by mingling with and relating to others, we become more than selves; we become social beings. Thus, sociological imagination. Third, though psychological and sociological imagination evolve naturally, together they do not achieve fullness of self that is, not without a willingness to reach beyond and above self, society, and world. Without imaginations working in this third dimension of the spiritual/philosophical, we risk remaining in states of becoming, neither arriving at fullness of self nor understanding ourselves fully. Self-knowledge requires a willingness to risk encountering the unknowable. Call it mystery, God, Allah, First Principle, or Reaching-Beyond-the-Boundaries-of-Knowledge or whatever better word comes to mind for you. I am broadly referring to thinking and wondering beyond the knowable to create a depth of character vital to comprehend and to work for a better world. Inwardly, most believe this; loving parents do; just leaders do; and, certainly, great religious and philosophical teachers do. In ways hard to explain, this reach beyond the knowable brings us to the threshold of the meaning of one of our more endearing capacities: love, itself steeped in mystery. It is love in its broader context that helps women and men shape common visions and just human communities. We dream; we hope; we try; we endure; we try again; we imagine; and, despite failures and foibles, we trust our efforts will not have been in vain. Thus, spiritual or philosophical imagination: thinking about mystery, larger-than-life-thoughts if you will, about God, or First Principle, or the purpose and meaning of life. These three, coming to grips with ego (psychological imagination), laboring for good relationships and community(sociological imagination), and drawing upon mystery and inspiration to put love to work in the world (spiritual/philosophical imagination) these three taking us into ever-larger chambers of self-knowledge finally provide responses to the two questions we asked in the beginning: Why should we treat others as we want them to treat us? And, what does it mean to know oneself? Through understanding and loving relationships we discover we are more than isolated egos and more than the communities we inhabit. We have purpose. Some call that purpose justice; others, peace;

still others, speak of a grand scheme of a sometime reconciled humanity that no longer endangers itself or its planetary environment. I ask you to consider profoundly the wisdom of treating people with a single moral ethic which, when done, helps bring an end to violence, sexism, racial and ethnic wars, the (s)exploitation of our young through terror, drugs, and seduction, and environmental abuse all these, crimes against our lives and life on the planet. Self-knowledge enables us to choose rightly and to choose how we will work for a better world, not only for the human species but for millions of other species sharing this planet with us. Is this larger task demanding? Yes. Frustrating? In this world, of course. Dangerous? Possibly. Necessary, absolutely. And, after all is said and done, the task to help build ever more equitable and healthful living environments discloses what sociology is all about.