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PITTSBURG, CALI FORUM*

INSTRUCTIONS
1.

To secure adequate patent

rights is an important purpose of this book. Only properly kept records will assure The Dow Chemical Company of such protection. When starting a project or experiment, write in precise language your purpose and general plan of procedure. Record your work as you progress, giving sufficient details. Handwrite directly in the book. Do not make notes on loose paper to be copied later.

attach the insert along one edge only and use the page under it in the usual manner.

Names
the

of witnesses

who

are present during

work should be recorded. Also the names of people with whom the work was discussed or to whom samples were given for analysis or testing. The dates of these acts should be recorded. It is also most desirable to keep
a
of other papers relating to your work, analysis sheets, test request sheets, purchase orders, test results, etc., One or more scientifically trained witnesses should read and understand the pages covering each
file

e.g.,
2.

All entries should be in permanent, black ink. Do not use pencil.

3.

The subject or title of the experiment and the book number should be accurately recorded at the top of each page. The date should be recorded at the beginning of each day's work. Note all absences such as trips,
vacation, illness, etc.

week's work and sign and date your book at least once a week. The witness form provided in the book every twenty pages also should be filled in. The witnesses must not be those who are co-discoverers with you of any of the work recorded.

4.

The various acts or experiments completing one or more projects may be recorded exactly chronologically, thus possibly mixing references to one subject with those to another, or space may be reserved for the complete recording of one experiment in one place over
several days, as you prefer. If the latter course is adopted, indicate at the start of the

New
new

concepts, new solutions to problems and ideas, plans or procedures and sketches should be recorded immediately in this book at the time they occur. When they are believed to be patentably important or when

next experiment how many pages were reserved for the one before it. Give a complete accurate account of what you did and what resulted. Enterallresultsgood or bad. Incase
of error

draw

a line through the incorrect

words. Then continue with the correct wording. Copious descriptions with elaborate details are preferable. Do not use private abbreviations or Company nicknames without frequently denning what they mean. Always keep in mind the necessity of original data to prove any new discoveries. If any portion of a page of more than two lines is left blank when that page is finally completed, draw a diagonal line through the space and write your initials and the date on the line. If it is necessary to insert graphs, etc., in the book,
SCIENTIFIC BINDERY PRODUCTIONS

experiments show results of possible patentable importance, they should be disclosed to and understood by your co-workers. The best possible proof of your discovery is to have someone who is scientifically trained repeat the work and record it in his own book. Whenever possible, have one of your co-workers repeat your work and note this fact in your book. In particular, when an experiment shows results of possible patentable importance and especially when no witnesses were present, have someone else repeat the experiment as promptly as possible.
This notebook and
all

information recorded

therein are the exclusive property of the Company. All contents are strictly confi-

You must take every precaution to safeguard this book against loss or damage
dential.

by

fire,

water, etc.

CHICAGO

S. ILL.

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DOW CHEMICAL COMPANY

BOOK NO.

S^X-O^c^Xjl <t^jl 4|^Jrs

&*0 >
a:-^// jV-cjtUV*10

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.

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THE DOW CHEMICAL COM]

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DOW CHEMICAL COM PAN

SAN FRANCISCO
22,

UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA MEDICAL CENTER

CALIFORNIA

5EARCH AND DEVELOPMENT LABORATORY

29 AugUSt 1962

Doctor Sasha Shulgin Dow Chemical Company Walnut Creek, Calif.

Dear Sasha:

JAY
Our log follows:

& myself tried the MMDA on Sunday, 26 of August. (cARM (taken by up to 11:30)

10:21* 100

mg orally

10:55 felt reaction, saw slight green tinge in shadows of faces. Pupillary dilitation CC. No dilitation for W. L., but he felt "layback."

11:05 Volluble, constant movement of hands & feet (as per usual for me) . L. experienced the "floats." 11:10

CC felt warmth & muscle "tone" (almost quivering)

11:30 Departed for Marin country with U>V (originator of tjjr Y v^S-) Shopped in supermarket at about 0.8g.
1

12:30

Arrived at home of WAIZTY <W oriental stage in living room.)

Picnic with no effect on taste.

Nj\ncy

(Magnificent

1:00

Still .8G, very pleasant

2:00
2:30

Experience comparable to 20 MG LSD 25. Feeling relaxed, composed

3:00 3:30

Back to normal; feeling of having taken amphetamine.

Returned homej approx.
.9g.

U:30 Slight feeling of "green apples" in stomach

9:00

Eyes still dialated; a little restless but slightly tired

To sleep.

11:00

Slept well.

Awoke refreshed and happy.

/W//Y

THE DOW
Observations

C-H-E-M-I-GA-fe

COM PAN ^y
BOOK NO.
"ethylene ,ioxy

on.

FsychoouuW

f foots

of Methoxy

Amphetamine

?vi^6\
11:20 a.m., Saturday, September
1,

1962

210 mg. MMDA orally

TC
5?

MMDA tastes awful.

The bitter alkaloid taste is followed by a

it'

distinctly chemical laboratory flavor as

This is easily dissipated by
a

from old rubber tubin

J
J

drink cf fruit juice and cookies.

othing ^eems Co happen for about kS minutes when rather suddenly

an anvil seems to lower itself over -"our head;

you feel disoriented,

In an hour you

/
^
U

and tend to withdraw from socia

little.
e

feel like wandering ofi

into the hills

alone.

This drug gives

less feeling of being ill than mescaline.

feet definitely

reaches a climax with

there is no

pleasant afterglow following.

or

rarently
I

profound motor coordinati

I

Although

didn't

^2 ^
j?P

feel too steady,

Would

could run down hill at full speed without falling.

probably have trouble jugglinc thou

200 mg. yMDA yields that "Sunday afternoon" feeling of desiring to

lie down and enjoy life; a luxurious feeling of "layback."

No enhancement of colors in visual scene

in faces)

(except some greenish tinge

but on closing eyes hallucinations appear to be quite

real in 3-D; like watching a movie.

hirst these dreams appear in

a;

black and

white but later color starts

In.-.

Chartreuse and
First had visions
on pare 2)
1 1

magenta first aopear, then blue and finally red.

tinued

i_j

T~irE"T>l

AL COMPffNT
BOOK 25

larere

numbers on

garni

brin ?
US

oetween the

Le

down ana su

3 t

be

he per s]

heat peac

just

comfortable

wt

on.

ful,
or

3D and a
a

more

enjoyin

.elds

rees

more than beinp- in

Commentary on
f

e:

had a

affed

iave SWO rn it

""

nta

fuscia and chart

st

7her

the re
ie
..

Then marv
chartreuse, blue,

trans

sphere

icn cascaded
9g<

down a gla
There
is
I

the wor]

don't remember the

time ago.

visions.

The Dig tendency is

ck,

not necessarll

etely

THE DOW CHEMICAL COMPANY

enjoy this feelJ

I

oua lor.-or.

'i

an:

pre
itly

feel just
1

incoherent,
ee '

atoxic

^pletely

Here,

Ju

relaxed by
and
just
'

with the world and

among the fields later
,

h111

'

'

'

But t:;6n * littl6

Iwa

lie down wit

'

and visions.

The euphonic

state comes
,ts start we,
*els w
tne
"a

the

aals as

think

He-nt
i

** 3ub

mscious without goin

feeling
o
i

a 1 i111e

aall.atio

feet were detached fr

akin side; an illusion somewhat

light-,
f

causing the
!

of
c

cigarette%ppear to detach
when waved in
a

the

-tte

semi -Oar.

Just now

Loain- my eyes,
w
n

""!

-'liant
ie

regal purple velvet encrusted

wnite

back-round.

The scene changes to a rid

effulgent light
toWe
S

pervading every t
However,
he eyes,
.b

!lo "' J

the

cene becomes drenched in

brilliant
as the

warmth

usness pervaded me

DOW CHEMICAL COM P,

'

recently expert

"pA^

iis

me"<

es

te

is

riru

Ld

sell

slaxan
it
i

Lant.

The

ulysts

shr
Tie

fact it proves to be as

conscious
rfhile

acious.

It ^eems

dreams

awak
1

real appear!'
nave never felt

scenes fill
It

in the movies.

rofoundly
ted

fin

-.'

THE DOW CHEMICAL COMPANY

//
-//
Si-]

-fl

J~wv^-

pfiJ *'

/-

\Ji

K_

MMDA

MINIATURE HIGH
J

UWe

**<*/

use the word miniature in the spnse that

would describe

niece by the jazz nianlst Bud Powell 33

Coirj

miniature.
i*ew "

rinsr a c

eethoven niano sonat* with Autumn in

York

as ol-yed by Powell would, be an^lagous to

/to

com~r^ng

attMl and

M
.

tLoa oilijno

MN!DA

domes through as a miniature hirh -- everything

is

there but in lesser quantity and duration.

VVDA

s tors

barely short of the Olvmnian Universe of

.

tiire-

ceasing and organic and inorganic rad'apces

of the
hlflji

i'he

immediate ^art

Is

about two and ^ne hnlf hour? in duration, Hather

is

than

cessation of Time, as there

a

with m^sclin or rsilocvbln,

there is

kind of time! a ssn-ss during the first m l^iselike

hour of the high. There is morn <?>a feeling of stur>pf act ion
than thre
In
a

is

with most highs.

I

car climbing theJBerkley foothills

*-/'',

went into a ter-

rible fear,

ne i^iphti Vor-at
it

^l&f&.S'pdA.'s

It only lasted a few

minutes -- but

did not matter in the tlmelesne ss how long

I

the nanic lasted A it was eternal.

looked out onto the grassy

hillside at the dead silver-brown grass, in the exnanse of field

'

could se- each separate blade of grass gleaming Kbi and the

THE DOW CHEMICAL COMPANY

trillions of brown-silver blades blended together into a vast

29

wavering fur.

*''

ar below was the nanorama of foggy Berkeley and

to

Oakland and the bay. --It all began

and beauty. --1 thought
I

loom 5n tlmeles^nesa
nt. a r

was going to
rr ' T
: -

the Olympian
I

Universe.

WAS NOT

EPARiD FOR

OLYMPIAN \WA
1

--I

had been expecting something like mari.1uana A

if I

realized that

sneered the Olympian that

hadn't yet recovered aufflctogether.

ientlyjfrom my last high to hold myself

Heat swelled in my genitals and rose to my stomach. --I

felt ^Uv agonizing $ ^FgfyfB&f 3 ar
to go back so
1
.

wanted to
i

a*

the others

could rake thorazine.

a

couldn't talk. The car

swerved around

hair in oend

in the road giving me another

view o^ the silverbrown g^ass-fur and the vast unwar ted dearness
of the

?>w.
I

Suddenly

was fighting with 'Obtain Zero

--

mean the

whole disor^ ~ed and et or, ni ty-se^king consciousness that is no

longer mammalian in mature but belongs to the order of molecules
and in^rt matter
1

decided

th

could do wasto go with it

-- to let ^ero take over, put

then

was su'-e that T would not

come back. *iian

I

tried to hold back the high but 4^ realized

I

would do mvself dcjnage that way. Then

tried to get on top

of the whole high and control it. -ill in all. I tried perhaps -v- almost iJ., L fifteen or twenty mx*m*1mxxm unrecnllable -aori undescrioabl*
y

means to /Jdih4^ control or escane the high.

Ehirnlgfe this

time

believed that

was goine to nieces

and

would possibly never be with the human-world again. V?

insides were eoing wild and my conscious mind s^em~d to be the only force ho ding me together. At one ooint
I

managed to ask

30

how the
-

'oaaj

b oo n

figured. --I was "asn"^d by com aring

;

dosage to masculine dosage

I

ro? a moment

grasned the fact

.

that

could go through three hours of the f -ar

vent wilder.
o

hen my insides
'.

and mind

esus
I

could not ^nt^r Olvmnia again'.

When the car sto "ed

was in co.^rol and

the aroused mol-

ecular consciousness had dis~i aced. ihe number of exits and

ratiKRJt ordinary animal no.ers that
I

{*&

tried had giv^n me conto 4de exof

trol,

account the sudden

p(jy

g
.

ng of ?ur^n-s?
1

neri nc^ with

lucinog^r.s
b\it

don't think

my

the methods

that

tried worked -i^st

I

the number of ooss ioilitles pave me

an as'urflno"
1

could control me even in Olyirria.

fc

told the others what had ha rened

'
'

ftinv
'

and felt
'

could
I

-n.loy somo
/
-

rf

h* day.
,

'

'

'
' '

f
th
,j

In ^r^stinsly

none of
'

oth^r oart ici-ants got tc the

I

Olvmrian Universe iurine the hitfh.

'

accent
'
'

th^ fact

that

'

'

touched
{LvJ
.

^pf^os^am &&
-

^-ti>gcnOMt5

iii.-^>-

wpeyote and osllocybin.

As wp
ftfttls
w".

k r-d

ijc

the fr

tcath ovr ffolden brown dust

saw

footprints of birds, tennis* sho Q s, and bare feet. The

quchxxjiIixji

frightening nature of tracks and artifacts beirar to

ovrwh^lm me.

\3

walked

tri d to insulate myself from the

sipbt. To my right wasthe d^eam ranor .ma of hundreds of

smare

mil-s of enchanted cities and dr- mreality fog "ouring uoon

th-m from the hay.
1

wisnot interested and oniv cared about

to m

k^oinp- myself together and not slicing back

Z^ro
.

et

Captain

The dnort, et-rnal. urhill walk exhausted us nnd we fell

on the ground
in a

tiny stand of tr es

still wanted the ex-

THt-DOW- C
i

end and
I

return to the me nines

had adjusted enough to make it through
t

and realMies.^6%

the high. My companions closed -ye 3 and having brain my eyes movies, (^arlier sqoquu had b ^n forced shut many times oy
the -u'horlc hallucinogen

:' asure.) Now

'.Yhen I

hied mv ?yes o"m

clos d ny
s

not wanting

in movies or visions.
I

ex-

perimentally

saw on] y

.s

and

-inp blackness.
I

We talked desu^.tor
I
3

and dozefully and

or

real iz~-d
.

that

was

aMe

to

s- a

through the 'yes

<s

my corrnanions
it
I
.

Th p y were

o, \np stark reality exactly S

t.

sa>

talk
t

^.4

r^&bO
'

Vrft

^\s-\1\Lf*^0f

found

Iking too
ion

V.y

toe:

and r

~e.
I

Vh=n

icaret 4 s

Lnd

ray

lira well and

they

were numbed. Matches kent

strong enough to blow them out.
We stayed in
tl

'/<e

ut in a wind that was not

wobbled when we walked.

of tr oo s
"Then
.

sand

sat for a wrile

then got
8

u*

and sat ir

nother Dlac.

got u^ again & etc.

lust ^n the verge
,

Exc nt for visual sensation, which w*s

or

of mescaline
sel

"silocy In vision in
living In
a

'

c a ri ry

to be

d from sensation and

a
3

kind of hyner-lucidity of

sense -I
1

ant paradox.
Jtis d raising the
t

ay iack and closed my eyes and

(

goddess Kundal ini

x he

Se"^nt Power) from the base chakr a

through mv nody.
Dower, for
I

XMMJUUtixxxmm.m.m.dni succ- ed"d

in raising the

the first time, past my shoulders and

I

into my head.

r^aliz^d, as

did it, that

was not truly raising the! Seroent

I

Power but rather cleaning the nerve tubes. However,

achieved

32

THE DOW CHEMICAL COMPANY

BOOK NO.

SUBJECT
-1
1

DATE
r
'

gr^ylsh-clear affective nictures

It was a g^od feeling.

"3.

The crystal clear air gave bright gr^en sharnness to th"

ev=rgrne. Look Tig at tr-es of leaves or olants whs like

mild mescaline high. Fir tr es bcam-- living, grn, modern

3ci)lDturs o f
'

-strange Indian rococo blasts

is

If

th

sculotor

Linschitz worked at th e ir trimming.

Th" malals'llke feeling

bpn

to

"nd tic

the

dozeful feeling

/ w i th
I

it.

walked to
I

rdw-nd corse whre oth"r members of

th*

narty

were sitting.

was struck by th" absolute and superb fcraix

o
:'

beauty and clarity

the peonle and the

trees and air and the

I

music that played over the por' .ble ^adlo.

felt close to the

I

children and admired their beauty,

that
1

fct

this noint
a

realized

was sim-ly sitting and

nle-.s

n joying
I

Sunday noon tXx in

its*~t\)ll

ntness. Ordinarily
r he
x

would nave been bored with

out more to do.

next couc

of ho

rs became

pleasant and
^

beautiful nicnic.
^ime

he come-down was abru-t but *t unr "asant

1

***<*,

mssed with swift rapidity

for the rest of

theday. Two
was kept from

hour -eriods would flash by.

glPPt) ^nr

Lat.p

-hat night

I
'

half an hour by brain movies

11

tie crocodiles

in the da-kness, * running across dusty roads through spotlights

out of magic eve~gre"n tr"es fading into and

u*? reality,

and juutata*xx anecdotal sequel

THE DOW CHEMICA

AH

rE

A w<v-k after

raking VWDk
I
I

woke in the middle of the night

and as

awakened

felt that there wo^ld be no reality but

was horrified and threw myself bolt upright
c

only nothingness.

in bed and opened my

yes instantaneo\isiy .

8helley says:
Lift not the painted veil which those who live

call Life* though unreal shapes be pictured there.

y|nd

*i&v but mimic all we would Del ieve

"T

with colors idly soreadybehind lurk Pear

^nd Hops .t3rin 0estinies who ever weave
"Their shadows oer the chasm sightless and drear.
The awakening
I
.

had was definitely a reaction to the WMDA.

I

Yesterday

talked with a man who has tak^n too much lsd.

01

tried

to avoid son king

I

hallucino ens but h^ wts insistent. As

described sotp post-In llucinogen states of extr me anxiety

regarding the nature of reality, the man began to writhe in his

chair, wring his handstand io^ the abllitv
to

speake*idDlr^
R-^_

J&frt

have be<n in that state. While sneaking with.

o\it

he identified it as an anxiety state and pointed

not only related to hallucinogens
ut
is

that it is

a not uncorrron

anxiety

state for those who haveinot had drugs.

o 0,,

accounts the state to an arising of 6conscious

material to the surface.

at
1s
'

s<=-

ms

f 'lTiA

and
er, What it d
-)<-

*hat
3
ri

ring as hit
T

C'a

the

intuitions that
I

hav that strengthen and contradict *ch ot-er.

ftV.at

am awa^'

of

two f^ lings:
th e

the 'material

'

is of

rnrsed

psychological nature in
ther c
is

Fr^u^ ian-Reichian sense, and that

also another order of'mate-ial'

confront ~d. The other

I

or^^r is that of the molecular lev~l of consciousness.

a

mean

nart of ourselves more related to th philosophical k*ju*m

arid

consciousness of sa urchins
the tugs of thir desires
arid

sronees -- who are no mere than

hungers and rhe consci nsn-sses

--

of their motions and withdrawals

who ar=

an

actual conscious

oart cf the -dnvsical universe and

th actual
1

b^injr of
e

their

oro^oolasm in the 'Surge of Life.

-

It would
'.

inter es'ing if

what we so surelv call the ftubcnsc d M o

o-p

Uncoaacious were
r

in reality two or mor e vastly divided ~artv

b^inp that

a^e both comironly unacn^.-si le.

I

am not

sayir.ff

this to

strnah'n

mv argument
N'VD.i.
I

uhat

con-

fronted th" molecular consciousness on

was in too much

I

of a fear state to be definite of anvthing hen

think of it

now

tw

w^eks later.
-- But
I

am intuitively sxxJtfcliB sure that

a
I
v

we are m-eting two unknown areas -- both repressions and

nijicMJttr m ^lecular-DhilosoT
a

hical-UniverseconcioMsness
t viese

ave

st^ons fe = llng that vh a second of

should
.

b<="

left untouched

by both psychiatry and happy-day inves t lea t l^ns

<Ve

mess with

som strucure that should remain unknown -- Unless the experimenter

is

a*are of *h P risk -- or ?o^'

9&

slo'viv in an

investigatory

manner with r|^ caution.

THE DOW CHEMICAL COMPANY

//

v\
ifeH,
"'

tin.
/>
,

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r
*

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*
t

ici

JJU
-^r^-*-9

.x^-Jl*-,
' '\/-v*V,

**

"^

*> -%

"1

-t-

JS-A,/
A.

*8

36

THE DOW CHEMICAL COMPANY

SUBJECT
BOOK NO.
DATE

^M^loJZl :^ju&

MTDA-fW

^
/
V\\\\i>%-

M^cM N^-i.
?

Wrje

OuwJL-

Wo Uo
V*o
d'
aA- '..-t <A^

J
lt!\o Pr,v\
.

It*, orb

'->oon.

4.1.

vJ
is

4oU fc*w.
6

Wo *&te2 ''

THE DOW CHEMICAL CO

SUBJECT

37

S*J

=a

&.<>u^^;

cri^ jJ$jiJ

M\>A
17/

o
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-?

Cfn

\u

4c

'-4/^

4.?

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Wv

icrw^.

v^*-^

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w^u,

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4-

-Vs\}~ 3. 5

*>/to fcs

flU

3<o

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(VV\

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ift.

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c^APji^P-e.
.'

itfo,^^. D..rwMi.
(1-^

^ciL^v)
^t-f^.^,

l o^>4 <^vO^

>

<i',V)llW\

Wirtn^(4

41,

(',

.Sr-t.^XZ ^

OQ

THE DOW CHEMICAL COMPANY

BOOK NO.

SUBJECT
DATE

!>

C*Wo
<R> \")o

Wos
6
ij

Ill -?4

71

v?,

\.0

<W

\
J

lfl.4,

I
UajJL

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21 .1

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and Description
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Chronology,

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Chronology
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and Description

of Effects

All times in the following are

ingestion.

stated as times from the first Observers' notes have been interwoven when appropriate.

0:00

Ingestion of 12. 5 mg (as hydrochloride) or 140 (j.g/Kg as the free base. (There had been no food consumed during the previous 12 hours. )
1:00

(TMA-2 has a very slight Ingestion of a second 12. 5 mg. alkaloid-like bitter taste - neither unpleasant nor lingering.)
1:20

Pupils show slight dilation, and an onset of diarrhea.

1:30

light

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1:40

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with

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LSD-25

intoxication,

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This phase receded except for the desire to vomit. Pulse unchanged. following 20 minutes.
2:00 to 3:15

During this hour, the complete syndrome, except for intense color There was effects, of severe mescaline intoxication developed. essentially no nausea, and the world was filled with distorted, moving things, all quite humorous. Peoples' faces were grossly distorted, and there was very little thought or worry of personal Muscular coordination quite good. Time passed slowly. safety. Conversation both coherent and clear.
3:

15

to 4:30

3: 15 the first indications of still further mental and A numbness of physical capitulation to the drug became evident. the fifth, and part of the fourth, finger of the left hand was frightening, and the recovery of this "asleepness" constituted a mechanism of preventing further inundation. Compulsive massage controlled this physical dissociation although asleepness of the

At about

56

THE DOW CHEMICAL COMPANY

-BOOK NO.

BJECT
In knees, muscular and abdominal cramping also began to occur. cycles there would be periods of relative simplicity followed by periods pf nausea which could be relieved in part by attempted (but unsuccessful) vomiting.

Simultaneously with the physical cycling occurred a mental, intellectual From occulation that, fortunately, possessed a different period. the beginning of this hyper-mescaline stage (about 3:30), waves of The hallucinatory motion-of-realnear-unconsciousness occurred. Periodically, at the objects became unavoidable and overpowering. crests of cycles, an impression of fainting would occur, and it was felt certain that to lose the thread of return would mean never to recover mental integrity.
Fortunately times of mental and physical stresses did not correspond. A short visit to a dark room Subjective time was badly distorted. was unbearable due to the active and frightening hallucinations.
4:30 to 5:35

At about 4:30 a return to a recognizable "mescaline-intoxication' was the first believable indication that there would be an eventual A drive through the countryside proved to be extremely recovery. humorous and enjoyable, comparable to peak effect at about 500 mg mescaline.
5:50

Increasing periods Rapid recovery from the above effect. lucidity. Completely unable to eat anything.
7:00

of

Able

was

A mild stomach ache to drive a car without misadventure. Occasional touches of the only remaining physical symptom. unreality did still occur but were completely controllable.
12:00

No remaining
Conclusions

effects.

Appetite good.

Sleep normal.

This drug, TMA-2, has an apparent potency of 20 to 25 times mescaline, and of perhaps 10 times' that of its structural If more complete studies isomer, 3, 4, 5-trimethoxyamphetamine show no increased toxicity for TMA-2 (all amphetamines so far have been similar to one-another) the improved therapeutic index (x20) would warrant the consideration of this chemical as a substitute for mescaline in psychotherapy and in clinical uses.
that of
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116

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SUBJECT
DATE
'

''

<& H H D A

may 31

eclipse day-1965
for

drugs were taken at 11:30

\Lo2^

10 mg V?l5k

15 LSD and later 40 ritalin

may 30 V?\sh took MMDA loo mg while I had harmalinefl this report concerns ^iJX,' > mmda 'lifSfiitiTf" It seemed to take 45 minutes to work and then came on very suddenly and 'hit 'me almost like a blow on the head;as if my eyebjalls were being pulled out and my whole head expending; Soon a COLD feeling set in and shivvering;this was not unpleasant but was in marked contrast to the Ritalin which gave a warm feeling of activity and verbalization entirely different that this The cold was as if I was in carbonated water(tis occurred as I was having the vision of a carbanated pool of water or nearly at the same time in retrospect) there was no anxiety ;then the lite seemed to dim in the room-this a retinal phen&m or having to do with the eclipse? in the pacific at about 3 pm; My state in about 2 hrs seemed to be one of empathy and passivity ,compassion of an impersonal sort;the music sounded artificial and canned and tinny in contrast to the voices which sounded rich full and finely precisely articulated and melodious Also I had the impression there was a lotof stuff in my head I was not talking
about; Later when left alone the hallucinations occurred ;as clear as any I have had on ot> p hallucinogens ; ( c ) these were not kaleido scopic or assembly line or oriental patterns ,but life like with vast open spaces(typical of her paintings and essence person patterns )with people moving slowly and liesurly much realism; I could conjure up monsters when asked but these had an artificial quality-they were eating something; other visions of much food preparation and skinning and prepareing of annimal skind. drying scraping etc;many wild flowers and WIND- streams which were already part of the ocean;I regertted its wearing off;it did so very slowly;I was in a paradise concerned with externals and conforming to the structure we had set up and perfectly satisfied to be all available and all out there with youjthe internal ness?not things and hallucin later were interesting but the real^vi ness and n nearness i think of reality was very gratifying ;a similar outerness with ritalin but it was more warm and dramatic nat so etherial; no profound philos thoughts but direct sensations which started with physical then emotional;no thoughts or judgements of people or things ;no facial distortions(she gets visaal and auditory hallucin-sounds of water running, creating 'music' of squeeks etc) POSSIBLE USES good for one with a lot of anxiety which shuts him off from experience ;those who are full of "I like, or "I dont like" they are so preoccupied that they dont see the things out there that are really going on, but project and shut off etc. I had a detached feeling while the ritalin seemed more personal and closely empathetic;sort of chummy and talky and pink tissue, /mmda was more like clear mountain air

with lsd my thoughts go sircularly,i get cought up in flippant philos ideation brain storms almost a mental masturbation
andwers to my questions that(with ritalin) the images was so preoccupied by Ko^ thev caused in my mind caused me to be almost physically removed;feel this way see^d "to 'work' to overcome the passivity this dmmda induced Kft"Z_
I

Reoort of

JAY

on /mmda

6/2/65

**?>.

a.

//

about 1/2 dosage

I

found this drug not at all like any other ;in the first place there were no

appreciable distortions

hallucinations or eyes closed imagry ;second the mind

thought subsided; third
I

was quiet ;no words explanations comments theorys and rational

was fully aware in present time especially during the forst few hours

fourth; despite the seeming short action of the substance there is a time disorientation

which lasts over six hours which undermines ones judgement in driving a car;so at least 12
hours should elapse before drining is undertaken;

in use of 02-C02 to potentiate the action of the drug there was a most remarkable effect
As though a floor of some sort was dropped frmm beneath me and yet
I

was still supported

and with this floor dropped a general feeling of anxiety of a free floatiDg type

which has been plagueing me for several months; later on a half hour or so later ;when
was i

explor^nig

the area newely empth of anxiety

felt it again for a few moments

and then it dropped away for good;I was completely without tention or pressure
of any sort;I expect that the effects are similar to that of a tranquilizer or an

ophiate( although

have experienced neither)

except that there has been a long term

change as a result;

J.IMDA

co2 and o2 used to set it off J'AY I felt as if a floor of some sorb dropped from beneath me and yet I was still supported ;v/ith this flood dropped a sens of free floating anxiety v/hich had been plagueing me for several months

30 min later when I was exploreing the area newly empty of nnxiety I felt it again for a few minutes and then it dropped away for good aid I was completely without tension or pressure of a ny sort; like being tranquillized or morphine

but ive never taken either

there has been a long term ohange as a result

6/2/65 this drug was like none I have ever taken; no hallucin noted and no distortions of what I looked at (I aggree with the lack of distortion of outer objects or faces) second; the mind was quiet no words explanations comments theories or ration! thoughts fully aware in the present tim especially in the first 3 hours there is a time distortion ;6 hours' later WHICH UNDERMINES ONES 'JUDGEMENT IN DRIVING i misjudged the traffic, lites duration etc
...

THE DOW CHEMICAL COMPANY

MMDA
reports
#1 49 yr old male; set relaxed to very slight anxiety over personal emotional matters. SETTING! De Martin be a ch off Falce-klamath rock 8/29/65 11:45 AM _ 11:45 150 mg 12:00 slight nausea and methedrine/ritalin like effects The 3 of us are at the falce river mouth drying seaweed on split redwood rhe fire burning preparatory to cooking the rock cr ab just caught takes on a fantastic appear ance 12:10 I withdraw ,the talk of the others is too much; she puts on sunburn oil WOW 12:15 the tiny fairy feet of the flies slight cramp like slight nausea and my visual field starts lighting up 12:20 some vertigo and heaviness and time streches outjnumbness in the chest as when an opiate is taken; Still study geometric patterns; excess lite on closed lids interfers with (retinal ) visualization, vertigo only with eyes open dance of the glittering diamond studded sea waves; increasing motion and beauty No t a ste,just passive introversion with l a rge time lag 12:30 people appear on the beach and talk to my oompanions;I have no par anoia this surprises me; 12:35 trembling after images are very brite and last long; I see a long corridor and faces upside doun 3D corridors that bend and recieve me basket likew with visions at the bottom; the m a n will drive and the woman provide; two beauties and or ab thirsty a nd mouth slightly dry; much less than with rit a lin or LSD etc green to rose after image NEED A SEMI SLEEP STATE FOR NEUROTICS /FLUS THIS DRIG /so they can let go to Its effects better Increasing landscapes appear inside; inw ardly I told her of her beauty and the outward she also responded by looking up at me. (this is a good introductory drug to the drugs of this class) to become familiar with the drug state in as gentle as possible a fashion L a ter; see my mother In animated conversation with another woman this w a s at 1:30
.
> '

12:50 to give self res and to cut off the trash and 'worry' so as to enter the semi dream state where you are protected; not as noisy(many) dreams ?as in live? or more? music or sea as a structured backdrop against which to go in bold kneeded wrestler geni probably on waves Like LSD nook Darred woman bitter crab and people fabuluous kiss sits up m a n upside doun facD; million fingered dance of the sea; green apple crunch I hallucnnate lists hungarian rapsody aid then waltzes then see at 1:30 my mother as above. others Remarks: this substance seems to have a much genteler action than little like Cannahis or psylocybine; there is of this class jperhaps more paranoia reported by anyone ii^w rotia which were strictly ^fi I noted the hallucinations of two types :one, those lite and evoked by foe* retinal and more minute and small and Influenced by the other those deeper using' on the 'lite' ahead on the retina or lids, and more global dream like in the visual tract end occiput which are larger and end when solid are quite dramatic and unforgettable as in meditation. There is less adrenergic or alerting effect per hallucinatory unit of this drug as well ;

JOW CHEMICAL COMPANY

REPORT ON MMDA TAKEN September
5,

1965

Since in my walwus type floundering about since then, l*ve managed to lose all notes made at the time, I'll try to do it by recall and then will undoubtedly find
them.

Drug produced light nausea and slight dizziness within about kS minutes and For awhile felt like mild dose shortly after began to feel "psychedelic" effect. LSD with slight disorientation and visual imagry at closing eyes. Imagry wasn't the vivid, shapp-colors type however, but like a kalaidescope filled with pastel colored smoke. Reminded me of a gadget seen in New York museum of modern art in which con= stantly changing swirling colors were projected on a screeen. Every now and then across this field floated an unidentifiable black shape/blob. Overall general effect sort of like Rorschach ink blots.

Within an hour felt my mind snap into advanced gear and attention focus like lasar beam. Felt KNEW what was about and was thinking with unusual confidence and clarity. Total focus on altho my response to him was less involved fsiL emotionally than it usually is in sessions. Was unable to cry for him or for self yet felt no hostility towards him or fear--just intellectual sort of endeavor and desire to do something effectual and positive. Was unable to account for some of his behavior and was very curious as to what diagnostic lables it would earn. Had an excess of energy and large overest imat ion of own strength-felt fully confident that could hold down my Ifialf of Ncli- with no trouble until recalled that this wouldn't be my normal realistic appraisal and then began to force a bit more caution. Could la feel my own emotional state being blocked as almost with a physical barrier - knew there was great upset underneath and that it would leak out as drug wore off but was
I

unable to feel

it

totally.

Time sense was slowed-kept looking at my watch and thinking more time must h< 'e passed than actually had, but wasn't disturbed by this. WhenfOGiu began walking a <und bacame restless - began wondering, wanting information and expounding his revelations could focus entirely on realized that ai long as there was active action activity. outside and was find, but when things slowed down feelings of self coming back were was stuck back with me and pain over JA\ Tried to turn it to distressing and interest in and learning about Niu and about the total situation buc kept wavering in attention between him and myself. B? By about 2 pm was ready to start on ME<u again, took it as sort He was unable and trying to get him to come down and sort of cut off. of a challenge. Q.u seemed unwilling to direct Hiim strongly and finally played on his need to "help" me by giving me an hour with vSlVe Put on the saddest music It worked. could in order to dredge up hurt over JAY and whatever it represents but altho tears were tjjere, it was all dampened and toned down. Knew was very upset but that knowledge was more upsetting than the upset knew was there.
I
I I I I ! I

Went out to the pool when $oltf 6 R and PSC-rC'l came MlSlu was all shaken, pains in chest, unable to breath, felt nausea and choking sensations. Was marching up and down, back and forth like ward patient in a yard. Was disturbed by this and went to tune the guitar on the piano wi th C-jt-Mfy Felt }Zbeing annoyed by me in house and by my playing wi th^tAPfS and knew I'd have felt hurt if it weren't for dampener of drug. (JcADY/S tuned the guitar and went out to see what found myself ablfc to We talked awhile and could do with w|L play that guitar like never before - was elated and entranced with my own music and new abi could work withNfSlL. and play along at the same time, found ty. .especial ly since using it for sort of background and emphasis and attention changer. Talked to H^ about felt him as a pains in chest - had him try Gestalt exercises but he was too far out. 'd like to be able to fix it, but not little boy asking mama to fix it and felt like couldn't do so. inddequate because
:
.

c*J0GJ

THE DOW CHEMICAL COMPANY

was happy to CtU^o^S came down, wanting attention and to sing and play the guitar. tore out and jerked him away like a shot/ see him and we began to sing a song but (5>"Zunderstood how she felt and her worry about his contamination, but felt resentful at being considered a contaminating agent so decided it must be pA-JL she was worried about and rationalized it that way.
I
I

Spent time talking tofgtftfV about her feelings since separation f rom $ufciriR. and watching her way with her child. All along was playing one song after another and my attention was sort of spl t ?&6rf ;ame on strong about dislike forSuWSR. but didn't realize she was saying it and by way of attonment m immediately began telling me a' ut how neurotically she operates - but n t*F s terms and sounding like a parrot. tried to be subtte and gently get her to see what she'd done, but it somehow didn't seem improtant So ?no\compared to fAo'U wandering around painfully and looking at me like a sick puppy. talked about the things that made him nauseous and he went and leaned over the fence w and a few things but explained that while these things would have upset him six months ago, they don't any more. Things such as "penis" and "breast" and "hand" and "hang". gegan trying to play Tom Dooley and noticed ,1 wonder if his mother hanged herself} Down in 'AcfU swallowing hard when got to "rnis time tomorrow weckon where l"ll be. Also on "Poor boy you're bound to die" a lonesome canyon, hanging from a white oak tree" was hep to and quit immediately. Began to worry that there was more going on than
i

'

Felt warm even toward S^EPS.^. - allowed him to play big ^wes^K- came and ^&a\ left. He showed me things on the brother thing with me wh.ich is his wewest button to push. Not ced VA^u- watching me 4jave it to him and began playing with J"AV guitar and Felt some sort of viwith tears in his eyes - he kept looking away. play withiX/vV brations emanating f rom r"A JL- - like he was silently begging, pleading, entreating me He could produce that would provide it. Didn't know exactly what for something. He did, showed it told him to pick a peach instead. was hungry and wanted a pear So to me like a little kid and ate it like one, leaving most of it all over his face. on^vitf^'s lap and began singing nursury rhymes. Pawl_ came and finally sat put ^AV didn t know what to make of it down but with that damn shit eating grin on his face.
I

so d idn

'

Lost Full of energy and coordination. Physical effect of drug most outstanding. did manage to whack my shin on the water pipe and trip fumbling, clumsey feeling altho Knew this was the same stuff j>V had in a hole twice. But that's par for any course. It was and kept wondering why wasn^t getting the same euphoric, limp happy eeaction. effects of a physical and psychic energizer for me but without the emotion emphasizing dexadrine. Went home and to sleep with 3 pills finally at 2 am. Kept self curling in sleeping bag womb all next day and night and didn't want to come,, to face the world on It isn't a nice world these aela days and it deteriorates steadily. Tuesday.
I

have read pages notebook atncl unTl There are im

to
<1

in thi

rluMi-

content

THE DOW CHEMICAL C

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THE DOW CHEMICAL COMPANY

BOOK NO.

~^/lo|u4

SUBJECT

tient is a 58 f* old aale

I

225 Kg a taken

had a stran

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of

ray

h-ndo to about 20 minutes; not a fecli.

so riuch as just that 1

i

was attracted to them soothe*

V

few minutes

began to get fo rful-of

lcnlincoo of the acute

in.
iae)Iiext
I

orience of olononess.I did not want to go

I

laid face doun (often a depressed position for

remember

to ether teachers; this v/as tal tag to the kids at school (an image) or

Very vivid; the sceens at school were

ore 1 actually
.

BBsre

vivid than tnose in

.ho

office

to'come b-ck' people more real than YOU.I tried

by getti
I

off to sc.:ool hysically close to foU.but still drifted effect of L was very sleepy throughout (not the lortinc with L tours later went immediately to sleep (I never did
I

rour

vas bothered by the

of tte}ity of reproduction

MSie fro

nutes after dru

at first

kon-t

crouded small office bothered me

of any experience

avo ha4

tis

Was most like a serios of

-ire.

after by our helpers in drug ly remembered (this dru- is most sought others)! felt after it v:as fundi n best on it as he orkr

over
i

d after a lor
a series of dream li

~'J

oxm to bod and

:md re 1

itates very vivid and colorful

THE DOW CH

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sting

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K^z. be one of these copies and I gues should have the other onej

(>

190 ttsgfto ng an experienced person ir he an f drugs: conplete neurological done 1 hr prior to testnig pletely negc-.:.re for was nysta mus-he fu ol nys in extremes of lateral gazelt hra after t -js drug he ^owt the a nount ar kiioe of the neurol te of 10 dlJ

hra

er

his b

b 14 /90 to start was ur ;ed icneed a bit of tingling in his arms and leg! and a B i LI sense that hla ,thio was not objectively confirmed during the nourol testl he had no hallucin etc

he only

<>

ect \ o is s ivo to a 'h as 8 mcgm of 3 de f lie of inje t.ion of 20 rag of within i a sense of tentlon Ir bhe chest not tinpleas zntl Lty ->te tr the oeeaeion The enlarge a t*ct with ome eryin - iso third dl Lonality of enisle and slight unsteadiness i lo comet usual rt and eiti draw . t ese effects seemed to be the equivalent ef bout lo to 15 " and lasted v or hour* wit) the pea at l.' to g hours.
r
'

'

...

11 be publishin

t my

taper with HA:Y on vitalin and LS part of it writt n

end 002 gas soon

124

THE DOW CHEMICAL COMPANY

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BOOK NO.

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BOOK NO.

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SUBJECT
BOOK NO.
DATE

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