Leigh Ann Dutton Intentional By Grace | Making it Impossible to Not Think About God a FREE ebook 2012 All

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Table of Contents
Introduction4 How to Use This Book5 I Am Thankful For...6 Relationship Evaluation...7 Have a Little Fun..9 Moving Forward.10 Closing Thoughts....11 About the Author...12 Recommended Resources...13

Introduction
Its all about the journey and what youre willing to invest in to make the marriage work.
~Intentional By Grace Reader

Marriage is our greatest earthly blessing. God desires for our marriages to be representations of Him - Christ and His Church. A marriage like this takes work. Lots of it. Susan Hunt says in her book, Your Home a Place of Grace: Our notions about family are usually shaped more by culture than by Scripture, and we live in a culture of individualism, selfism, and materialism all of which are hostile to cultivating an environment of grace in our homes.

This book was created to facilitate and encourage intentional conversations in our marriages. The following worksheets will help you determine ways in which you can grow as not only an individual, but as a couple, as well; thus strengthening your marriage and bringing glory to God. As we surrender it all to Him, may we experience grace in our marriages and in our homes.

A Surrendered Marriage

How to Use This Book

When we take time to talk about our struggles, temptations, and blessings, we feel more connected.
~Intentional By Grace Reader

Set aside a time, at least once a month, to review these worksheets together. You will need to make double copies of pages 6-10 - one for yourself and one for the love of your life. If your children arent already occupied, then get them set up with an activity, or wait for naptime (or better yet do this on a date night). You want at least an hour (or more) of uninterrupted time together. Before you begin, pray together. Ask God to fill each of you with the Holy Spirit. Pray for Him to illuminate the sin in your hearts and point out evidences of grace in your marriage. Pray for a heart of humility, as well the ability to speak the truth in love. Pray that He would bond the two of you together and bring glory to His name. Then, work through the following worksheets: I Am Thankful For Relationship Evaluation Part 1 & 2 Have a Little Fun Afterward, fill out the Moving Forward worksheet together. This is a time to summarize what youve worked through, and agree on some action points. Be sure to set a date for your next intentional conversation. Finally, finish your time together in prayer. Pray through your prayer requests and thank God for the gift of marriage.

A Surrendered Marriage

I Am Thankful For
I do not cease to give thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. Ephesians 1:16 (ESV)

Write in the lines below, at least ten things you are thankful for about your spouse. Then, share with your spouse each answer. Use this as a time to express gratitude and point out areas of Gods grace in each others lives. For example, the husband starts with sharing his first answer. Then, the wife shares her first answer. Talk about why you are thankful for each thing; share examples for each answer.

1. _____________________________________________________________ 2. _____________________________________________________________ 3. _____________________________________________________________ 4. _____________________________________________________________ 5. _____________________________________________________________ 6. _____________________________________________________________ 7. _____________________________________________________________ 8. _____________________________________________________________ 9. _____________________________________________________________ 10. _____________________________________________________________

A Surrendered Marriage

Relationship Evaluation
(Part 1)
Complete Part 1 and Part 2 of the Relationship Evaluation individually. Then, review answers together.

Our relationship at this time is __________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________ Our biggest source of conflict at this time is________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________

What are you doing to cultivate leadership/submission?_______________________ __________________________________________________________________ It would help our relationship if I would ___________________________________ __________________________________________________________________ Are you inviting intimacy; are you nurturing tenderness and passion? Explain.______ __________________________________________________________________ What are you doing to let your spouse know you prize him/her above all others? ___ __________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________

A Surrendered Marriage

Relationship Evaluation
(Part 2)
Please circle the number you fill best describes your relationship at this time in the following categories.
1 = needs significant improvement 3 = okay 5 = needs very little improvement

Seeking the Lord Together1 2 3 4 5 Praying Together....1 2 3 4 5 Praying for One Another....1 2 3 4 5 Communication..1 2 3 4 5 Priorities (God, Spouse, Children, etc.)1 2 3 4 5 Conflict Resolution.....1 2 3 4 5 Sexual Intimacy.......1 2 3 4 5 Emotional Intimacy....1 2 3 4 5 Date Nights.1 2 3 4 5 Playing Together (i.e., Are you having fun?) ...1 2 3 4 5 Creating Memories as a Couple.1 2 3 4 5 Creating Memories as a Family.1 2 3 4 5 Helping Each Other with Children...1 2 3 4 5 Faithfulness to Encourage One Another..1 2 3 4 5

A Surrendered Marriage

Have a Little Fun

It seems as though were always looking at each other and saying, This is how we know God made us for each other.
~Intentional By Grace Reader

Playing together as a couple is essential to a fun, lasting marriage. Additionally, to think that we know everything there is to know about our spouse is to starve ourselves of the mystery of marriage. No two days are the same! No two people are the same! There is still much to learn and discover about one another! So start playing and discover a thing or two about the person sitting next to you. What are 3 things you can do start playing together more often? 1.__________________________________________________ 2.__________________________________________________ 3.__________________________________________________ Need help? Check out 42 Date Night Ideas for the Date Night Challenged. List 5 things you wish you knew about your spouse. 1.__________________________________________________ 2.__________________________________________________ 3.__________________________________________________ 4.__________________________________________________ 5.__________________________________________________ Examples: What are your favorite books of all time? Why do you like skiing so much? Why do you drape your underwear across the hamper instead of putting it in? What is your favorite meal that I make? What is your biggest fear about the future?

A Surrendered Marriage

Moving Forward
Every couple struggles from time to time. God is faithful. Trust Him, obey Him and you will be secure.
~Intentional By Grace Reader

Take a moment to sum it all up together. List 3 areas to work on. 1._________________________________________________________________ 2. ________________________________________________________________ 3. ________________________________________________________________ Share prayer requests for the week. 1._________________________________________________________________ 2. ________________________________________________________________ 3. ________________________________________________________________ Set a date for your next intentional conversation. __________ _______, _______ (month) (day) (year)

A Surrendered Marriage

Closing Thoughts
I'm not saying that I have this all together, that I have it made. But I am well on my way, reaching out for Christ, who has so wondrously reached out for me. Friends, don't get me wrong: By no means do I count myself an expert in all of this, but I've got my eye on the goal, where God is beckoning us onward to Jesus. I'm off and running, and I'm not turning back. Philippians 3:12-14 (The Message)

You made it! If youre anything like my husband and me, you took three hours to go through this little exercise. The first time is the hardest, especially if you arent used to talking about these topics on a regular basis. Please, be encouraged. With time, it gets easier, and dare I say, much more fun! My husband and I love working through these exercises together. We always learn so much, and we walk away filled with hope for our marriage. So dont be discouraged if you didnt make it through each question, or you ended with more areas of conflict to resolve. Continue being faithful to pursue one another in love, and pray for God to heal any wounds. He is faithful, friends! Weve only to ask Him. Well close with the words from a loyal reader of Intentional By Grace

The best is yet to come!

A Surrendered Marriage

About the Author

Leigh Ann Dutton, owner and editor of Intentional By Grace, whose life goal is to create a home that makes it is impossible to not think about God, loves to blog about intentional living in order to make this goal a reality. She graduated Cum Laude from the University of Tennessee with a B.S. in Business Management. She spent over three years in the career world before coming home to serve her family, which is her hearts desire. She is the wife of almost four years to the man of her prayers, Mark, and mama to a loveable little boy, Samuel. She takes joy in spending her days creating memorable moments with her husband, conducting kitchen experiments, researching every natural alternative known to man, and making her little boy laugh. She does it all by the grace of God. Intentional by Grace was launched in April of 2011 as an outflow of her passion to share the gospel and inspire other women to steward all that the Lord has richly blessed them with.

Recommended Resources
There are many wonderful resources available to help you build marriages on the solid foundation of Jesus Christ. Here are two of my favorites.

31 Days to Build a Better Spouse by Ashley Pichea

Powerful ebook that walks you through praying specific character qualities for your spouse daily.

Love That Lasts: When Marriage Meets Grace by Gary & Betsy Ricucci
The first book we ever read together as a couple. In our fourth year of marriage, we are on our sixth copy. We just keep giving ours away.

Disclaimer
(the small print)

This ebook does include links to sponsors or affiliates, which give me a small percentage of the sale. You are not obligated to use these links if/when you make a purchase, but when you do it helps to support Intentional By Grace and this free ebook, so thank you! Any products or services that I have linked, you can be sure that I believe in them and the benefit they will be to you.