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Rivers Edge
VOLUME 5, ISSUE 5

Western Illinois University - Quad Cities The Public Choice for the Quad Cities
December 7th, 2012

SGA Strives to Reassert Itself in the Face of Continued Group Turn Over
By Aaron Graf
Editor-in-Chief

Despite its mandate to facilitate and enhance the opportunities for all of the other student organizations on the WIU-QC campus, like many of those same organizations the Student Government Association has had to face the challenges posed by a student body that can experience major turn over each semester, and the difficulty this creates when trying to retain members. Over the course of the Fall 2012 semester a group of students who were almost all new comers to SGA had been appointed to fulfill the roles of President, Comptroller, and Chief of Staff. In addition to the difficulties they experienced trying to approve an SGA budget for the semester, one was only passed late in November, efforts to bring this new group of leaders up to speed about a few of the traditional SGA activities like the Day long Health and Wellness Fair have demanded that changes be made in order to accommodate the groups diverse makeup. SGA president Michael Woolever, who was appointed to the SGA Presidency in April of 2012 and then took over for outgoing president Georg Gunzenhauser in August of 2012, explained what is being done to alter this event during a recent interview with the Rivers Edge. Every semester we try to promote a healthy activity for the students, unfortunately this year we got a late start. Because of this the other officers and I considered how the health and wellness fair that occurs every fall might be changed, and we decided that rather than do one big day with the health an wellness fair theme, we would instead sponsor workshops that could take place throughout the year. These workshops were started the week of November the 12th. Mr. Woolever noted that by having a greater number of events throughout the semester a larger people can gain an awareness of SGAs presence on campus. In addition to the Health and Wellness workshops, SGA has sponsored the Mississippi Valley Regional Blood Centers Annual Blood drive, as well as new event, Movember. According to the organizations U.S. website, During November each year, Movember is responsible for the sprouting of moustaches on thousands of mens

faces, in the US and around the world. With their Mos, these men raise vital awareness and funds for mens health issues, specifically prostate and testicular cancer initiatives. SGA sought to make a global partnership by challenging a university in Germany to a fund raising contest with the competition centering around the sponsoring of individuals with fancy facial hair.

Newly appointed SGA Senator Staci Clay and SGA Comptroler and Holly Barnes display a few of the SGA braned items availbe to students Photo By : Aaron Graf continues on page 5

SGA

An Athiests Christmas Wish

By Matt Alden Brown
Staff Writer

This holiday season, people around the world will celebrate the winter months in their own way, just like their people have done for ages. The Chinese have the Dongzhi Festival; Bahamians have Junkanoo; the Cornish have the Montol Festival; Germans have Yule; African Canadians and Americans have Kwanzaa; Jews have Hanukkah; and Christians have Christmas. Not to mention the various New Years festivals on both the Gregorian and Julian calendars that are celebrated. These are only a few holidays that are widely celebrated today that started centuries ago. While Americans celebrate more than Christmas, the holiday assumed to be on everyones mind now, the celebration is certainly not restricted to Christians. Actually, the majority of people who are not Christian still enjoy the holiday whether they belong to other groups or none at all. Atheists are one of those groups, which I comfortably belong to, that fully

appreciates and celebrates Christmas secularly. While I have started to celebrate fully secular holidays throughout the year, I still celebrate Christmas. Every year when December comes around, my girlfriend and I get out the decorations, both sophisticated and cheesy, for the family to distribute where they like. We start the holiday season off right by finding a tree to smother with lights and ornaments, generally before other families get the idea and create grid locked parking lots at stores selling the trees. I start wrapping presents that I have accumulated throughout the year (my family does the same) and place them beneath the tree to complete that festive tree image. On Christmas morning, the young one finds even more presents under the tree, signed, from Santa. It sounds like everyone elses Christmas so far, and for the most part, it is. The difference is that I

do not view Christmas as a religious holiday. While some will surely argue that they experience a supernatural joy this time of year, as religion often challenges, I am convinced otherwise. To me and other atheists and Humanists, the holiday season encourages people to express love, kindness, and well-being during the winter when, at one time, it was very hard for humans to survive. Christmas is merely one holiday that shares feelings of gratefulness and togetherness and promotes happiness during the roughest time of year. I respect and appreciate the idea of Santa, a Humanist whose goal is to spread joy to every child on Earth, especially those less fortunate. It is because of these kinds of people in the world today, both religious and not, that Christmas maintains a wholesome, good vibe for those who participate. I look forward to giving more than receiving and revel in a world where humans have, for the most part,

overcome the harsh conditions from the previously dark times enough to celebrate life. This holiday season, though I no longer have a religious bone in

Darwin Claus Courtesy of crudelyinterrupted.wordpress. com

my body, I will enjoy Christmas as much, if not more than, everyone else with hot chocolate in hand, while many other kinds of people do the same. Happy holidays!

2 December 7th, 2012

THE WESTERN WALL

RIVERS EDGE WIU-QC

Chick-fil-A, or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Controversy
Assistant Editor I had a lot of questions when, on Thursday, November 8th, I walked into Kristi Mindrups office. A handful of those questions I had jotted down on the small, tattered notepad I carry around to feel like a real journalist, were all sparked by a seemingly moral inconsistency I had encountered two days previous. That Tuesday before, I had taken part in an event known as The Big Picturea photograph taken in a show of support and unity with the GLBT community (Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgendered). As many of you may know, our Tuesday food vendor is Chick-fil-A an organization with a recently highly publicized history of donation to such groups as the Pennsylvania Family Institute and the Family Research Council, two groups with official stances against same-sex marriage. So, as a few dozen WIU-QC students, faculty, and staff had our picture taken as a group in support of gay rights, Chick-fil-A sold its delicious sandwiches not twenty feet away. It was confusion along with a dose of the standard angry young man raging against injustice that drove me to seek out answers to the questions that swam through my mind questions I am not smart or capable enough to articulate sufficiently here. A few fingers pointed me in the direction of Kristi Mindrup, assistant Vice President of our fine campus. I suppose it is both fortunate and unfortunate that I cannot simply print our entire twenty-five minute conversation here in this newspaper. It is fortunate for me because it means I will not have to reveal to you, dear reader, just what an unthoughtful, arrogant, knee-jerk reaction I had to Chick-fil-As presence on campus. It is unfortunate because I can only reveal to you but a fraction of Kristi Mindrups insightful thoughtfulness and respect for differences of opinions (a quality that should be held in great regard in todays highly divided and divisive political and social atmosphere). In short, dear reader, Kristi Mindrup humbled me. First and foremost, Kristi told me, We want to create a safe environment for all students. [When the Chick-fil-A controversy hit the media,] we had conversation about How do we do that? Is it by establishing student organizations? Is it by creating a faculty and staff group, BRDGS? Or, is it by boycotting chicken? I chuckled at this statement. When phrased that way, the choice is obvious. I dont mean to make light, Kristi said, because its very serious, the fact that they have a history of donating. But, theres a catchas a public institution it would be against the law to turn away a private vendor, even ones that have donation practices that directly go against the values that WIU-QC espouses. Furthermore, since Chick-fil-A does not have discriminatory hiring practices, they are following the law, and a public institution cannot turn them away under these circumstances. Theres another aspect to this, aside from the legalitiesand this is more me philosophically, she says, meaning Kristi Mindrup the person rather than Kristi Mindrup the administrator, and that is, when youre talking about civil rights . . . Im not sure that the best way to have a positive dialogue is to turn away from the conversation. This, dear reader, is where it gets good. This is where my anger at injustice falls away, and I realize that I have had a knee-jerk reaction. This is where I realize that I have been exclusionary in my thoughts toward others, just as those who take stances against gay rights. Im not sure that the best way to move forward and be inclusive is to separate [those with differing ideologies]I personally think back to other civil rights movements, and one of the things that strikes me with this one was almost a sort of self-selection, of moving out of the conversation, and saying well, I disagree with you, so Im not going to talk to you anymore. Im quite certain that removing dialogue is not the thing thats going to make progress, Kristi continues. You may be saying, as I did, well, I get that, but at the same time Chick-fil-A isnt down there in the atrium having conversations with people about this issue, its just selling chicken. I would say, Kristi responds, that there has been a great deal of dialogue around the conversation, and even if the vendor itself is not having the conversation, here we are right now. Consider my mind officially blown. I think that through conflict, there is a great deal of positive energy that can

By Bobby Dillon

come out of a situation [like this]. What didnt hit the headlineswas that Chick-fil-A did change their stance. Indeed, the company has, at least publicly, changed its donation practices. While this may mean little to the more cynical of us, when given some thought, it is actually a phenomenally good thing. Think about this: Chick-fil-A corporate, in the span of months, has gone from doing, what I would call real, tangible harm to the overall good of our society, to not doing real, tangible harm. Though small, that is an improvement an improvement that would not have happened if this very conversation were not being had throughout the country. Kristi continues, We have to be cautious, as well, about what message we send by sending a group away, because we have students on campus from all backgrounds, and I think that you make a strong statement, symbolically, when you choose to alienate or boycott, and I really think that the learning outcome, and the opportunity for dialogue, and the opportunity to really create a safe space for students, doesnt rest with whether we have chicken on campus. Thats easy thats the easy thing to do, right? Get the chicken out, and suddenly were a safe space for students. No. Weve brought panels to campus, weve had events, we just had Safe Space training for faculty, staff, and students, and I think that theres an overemphasis on Chickfil-A because it was such a hot topic in the media, and its become this conversation piece around the issue. But the real conversation, about social justice, doesnt relate to chicken. It relates to what actions do we do on a daily basis that create a safe space for students. I think that inviting difference to the table is an important piece of that. Thats the thing I really want to emphasizethe importance of having the dialogue, people getting around a table, in a classroom, talking about the issue, and starting to understand people, rather than just the issue itself. While there exist certain legal reasons why WIU cannot push away a vendor, more importantly, Kristi says, I think back to other civil rights movements, really tumultuous times, in the south, for example, and you saw people going in to places that were keeping them away, the [segregated] Woolworths counters, and so on, you saw people going in to those places, and trying to change their mind that way. You didnt see them staying away from the place and saying okay, Im alright with you not agreeing with me. Throughout our conversation, Kristi continually referred to inclusiveness of all ideas. An underlying, implied sentiment is that, most likely, there are students, fellow classmates, who may share the (former) Chick-fil-A anti-gay ideology. Good, honest, real human beings with whom we share this beautiful space, and by rejecting Chick-fil-A, we would be rejecting them, we would be rejecting our classmates. While disagreement is one thing, this campus is a safe space, first and foremost, for all students. Rejecting them outright is the absolute wrong way to go about changing minds or promoting unityI can think of no better way to enforce a persons beliefs than to persecute him or her because of them. If we reject Chick-fil-A because of their donating practices, we alienate fellow students, and then what? We go on our merry way, insulated from any and all differences of opinion? When Kristi asked me how I became interested in writing about this topic, I referenced my confusion during The Big Picture. Think about that, she says, the power of that theyre standing right behind The Big Picture. I think theres power in that, to think about Heres this group of people, heres Chick-fil-A, nobodys fightingwe forget that there are real people behind some of these things. Im guilty, dear reader, of forgetting that sometimes. I get so caught up in the issues of the day that I forget my utter belief in moral relativism; I forget that people believe what they experience. My life, and my life only, has brought me to my beliefs and opinions, and the same goes for the rest of you. While I get angry about political divisiveness, I sometimes forget that I am just as guilty as those at whom I am angry being able to acknowledge and realize that, by far, is the biggest lesson I have learned through this conversation, a conversation created by the controversy surrounding it. Thank you for sharing it with me.

Why Do We Do This to Ourselves?

This represents the final time Im going to have the chance to address this audience via editorial ramble. As such, Id like to take the opportunity to thank everyone at Western Illinois Quad Cites who made the time spent here worthwhile. Among those there are three people of special prominence whom I cannot thank enough. They are: my learned advisor, Mr. Kenneth Wheeler, the conscience I never knew I had but found I needed; Dr. Tammy Werner; and Dr. Everett Hamner, the man whose office door was never closed, who presented opportunities that provided my most rewarding academic experiences, and is responsible for why I will go through life considering myself to be a Hamnerian scholar. Thank you all very much for your commitment to my personal growth and education, and for your commitment to the education of the students of WIU-QC. Now a question, why do we put ourselves through the kind of weeks we encounter at the end of most semesters? No doubt, like many of you with only a week remaining, I find myself faced with deadlines for a months worth of work and no illusion about the necessity for completing all of it on time. Likely even more of you can relate to my situation when I note that school is one of several major responsibilities to which I am bound. The other responsibilities arent ones to be taken anymore lightly than the tasks meted out by our professors either. This is evidenced by the fact that, more often than not, the additional chores are of enough importance that to complete them we must impose upon the time we try to set aside for our, not so cheaply bought, educational endeavors. I dont mean to imply that the amount of school work that I face comes as a surprise to me. Nope, no surprises here, because every one of the brilliant, thoughtful, and well-rounded educators who have put up with me for the last four months supplied me with a course syllabus on or around the beginning of the semester. Never-the-less, as I have, time and again over the course of my career at Western, I find myself staring at deadlines which are now be measured in hours rather than weeks and months. And like that familiar feeling of impending doom, an equally familiar question crops up in the back of my mind as it always does around this time each semester. Voiced in a fairly incredulous tone it asks, Why are you doing this to yourself? The simple answer is of course that Professor Dilger will cane me if my semester project isnt

A LETTER FROM THE EDITOR

turned in on time! All kidding aside, the simple answer is, of course, to graduate and, as a result, take advantage of opportunities now available, but which were out of reach prior to obtaining the sheepskin. But even as I begin to allow myself to hope that I will graduate come December 15th, the simple answer doesnt really satisfy. Fortunately, a more complex answer does. Firstly, and in all seriousness, the knowledge earned by completing the work is worth the effort needed to earn it. Second, by completing these task, by losing sleep, and remaining optimistic in the face of a world which informs me that my degree will not be enough to secure a future for my family, an awareness that I will have done something hard and not been overcome, despite the trial, is feeling of accomplishment that is hard to come by. Thirdly, while earning my education has not been easy for me, Im not so nave as to think I would have been able to accomplish any of this without the sacrifices made by my amazing wife, Victoria, and our four kids, Cecelia, Fiona, Mano, and Leo. Just as they have in past semesters, my family is doing without me as I complete my assignments, and they do it without complaint and with a willingness to give me the all the time I need to work. Thankfully, as she has in the past, Tori assures me that by completing this semester, and ultimately graduating, their selflessness is honored in the best way possible. For these reasons, the time lost, the stress experienced, and the things left undone to assure that deadlines are met, become meaningful, and for me, the question of Why are you doing this to yourself? is satisfied. Make no mistake having a diploma on the wall will serve to give some satisfaction over the years, but the primary satisfaction, for me will always be derived from the knowledge gained and the journey taken. So good to have met so many of you, and as always,Let the Father of Waters Roll Unvexed to the Sea. Aaron Graf Editor-in-Chief

RIVERS EDGE WIU-QC

FAMILIAR FACES

December 7th, 20123

Student Profile:Christopher Macksey

By Caressa Clearman
Staff Writer

As the end of the fall semester draws near, many Western Illinois University students scramble to write that last term paper or cram for that last big test. Time management is key, and student Christopher Macksey knows this. Although this is Christophers first semester at WIU, he entered as a junior. He is a Communications major still deciding whether he wants to add a minor in Psychology or Business. I feel like Im going to end up working in business but I wanted to take some psychology classes just to understand how the brain works and such, states Christopher. Understanding how his own brain works, Christopher schedules time for studying. He says, Today, I told myself Im going to be here at school at 9:00am and stay until 1:00pm or 2:00pm, then Ill ride my bike, (I brought my mountain bike with me today), to Port Byron and back, and then come work on my paper some more. Christophers schedule gives him a little peace of mind. Ive improved my productivity, he says, and the idea of accomplishing a goal always feels good, so youre going to want to do it again. Mountain biking is just one of many activities that Christopher enjoys. I like to exercise. I work out at the YMCA. I [ride my] mountain bike. I [play] Frisbee golf. I just tr y to stay active... Im in a poker club where we play on Wednesday and Fridays. I tr y to reach out, I volunteer. I dont have kids so I just tr y to stay busy, he states. Christopher likes to exercise his mind as well as his body, and he enjoys a little reading. He says, I like to read biographies because I like to read about how people persevered through tough times and adversity. I liked the Andre Agassi [biography] that came out, Im not a big fan of tennis but that was a good one. Over the break, Christopher plans on focusing on the holidays and relaxing. He says, Ill just basically be getting all the gifts together. I like interacting with people but I dont like to be in the stores, the Wal-Marts and stuff. Im just going to enjoy

the time off. Ive thought about going to a Viking game down in St. Louis but theyve lost 4 of their last 5 games, and I dont know if I really want to go if theyre going to lose again. After break, Christopher will be back next spring with a projected graduation date of spring 2014. He doesnt have a specific career path yet but he states, Communications is a diverse field, thats why I picked it as a major because you can do a lot of things pertaining to customer ser vice, or marketing, or business, or more. I wanted to have options. He seems to be off to a great start. Best of luck Christopher, and Merr y Christmas!

Photo By Caressa Clearman

By Antoinette Brown
Staff Writer

Faculty Profile: Dr. Tammy Werner, Assistant Professor of Sociology and Anthropology
fourth wave, which will reinvigorate the movement, and address some of the ongoing issues . . . for this to happen, women need to have political power, she asserts. Of course, its not all work and no play for Tammy: Most of my free time, at this point in my life, is devoted to my four-year-old granddaughter who lives in the Quad Cities. Becoming a grandmother has been an incredible experience. When shes not on campus, she does have a few choice locations here in the QC: Im partial to chocolate and ice cream, so Lagomarcinos in Moline is my favorite place! She also enjoys the farmers market in Davenport and the Village of East Davenport. I think valuing and supporting local businesses is important, she says. When looking to learn more about womens issues and social inequalities, look no further than Tammy Werner. If you are interested, Tammy teaches at least one class a semester, so sign up and enjoy!

For this last faculty profile as the Fall semester wraps up, we bring to you the infamous Tammy Werner, professor of Sociology. Focusing on her passion for social inequalities, and more specifically Womens Studies and Appalachian Studies, Tammy teaches courses that not only inform you, but motivate you to do more. Tammy seems like a natural fit for this campus because she herself was a non-traditional student. Dropping out after her first year at a large public university, she married and had two children and worked full time for the next two decades. While working, she had first-hand experiences with the social inequalities that would later drive her own research and teaching. One such experiencealmost losing her daughter because she had no health care insurance and couldnt afford $26 for the doctor for spinal meningitisdrove her to question, as she puts it, the American dream versus my own experience. She says, I was working hard, trying to make it, but couldnt make enough money to afford health insurance for my children. Upon returning to community college, where she eventually took 18-24 hours a semester, and then to graduate school, she followed her interests and studied Sociology. She says the discipline seemed to offer a way to address the big questions. Tammy is well-known around campus for courses focusing on womens issues and feminism. When questioned about the most important issues female students here at WIU-QC need to be aware of, she said reproductive politics: they always play out on womens bodies, and the question of who controls womens bodies remains relevant. After discussing Senator Todd Akins comments about legitimate rape, she adds as women, we cannot let our guard down. I am concerned that younger women assume there is a level playing field, when in fact we havent made much progress in recent years. She feels getting involved in womens rights here on campus is a great way to show support for these issues. I would love to see an interest in forming a feminist alliance, a group that both supports and promotes womens issues and gender equality, she says. But even getting involved with current organizations and helping organize events dealing with gender is a great start. Dr. Werner Refused to Give Us a Picture of Herself, So Instead, Here is a Picture of What We at the Rivers Edge Like to Imagine She Does on the Weekends; As anyone who knows Tammy can attest, feminism is a passion of hers. Courtesy of negotiationlawblog.com When asked where she feels the feminist movement is now, she replies that we are in between the waves. I am hopeful that we are beginning to ride a

4 December 7th, 2012

By Bobby Dillon
Assistant Editor

RIVERS EDGE WIU-QC PAGES The Case of the Maybe Murdered Millionaires, Part Five: A Few Questions

Daisys burly goon grabbed me around the waist as I bled profusely from the fresh stab wound her ornate dagger had given me. Dragging me into the abandoned Hope Shelter, he took me to a large room adorned with little more than a solitary office chair. The goon shoved me into the chair, tying my wrists to the armrests and my ankles together. I noticed through the fog of searing pain that the goon had fresh blood on the sleeve of his fine collared shirt. Thats gonna stain, I said groggily, nodding toward the sleeve. His response was to clobber me in the face and tell me to shut up. Apparently he was not as concerned as I was about the shirt. Taking account of my surroundings, I realized that nothing added up why would Augustus burst into my office to have me find these creeps before they took over the Hope Shelter when the Hope Shelter is clearly abandoned already? Why did, not twelve hours ago, Daisy come waltzing into my office begging for a job only to stab me? I heard the click-clack of her heels behind me. I guess Im about to nd out, I thought. I could feel myself on the verge of passing out from blood loss as Daisy stood in front of me, tied up and desperate, looking down. She leaned over, put her hands on the armrests to which I was tied, in order to be face to face with me (and Ill be damned if I didnt sneak a look down her shirt). In spite of everything, in spite of my swelling eye, in spite of my torturous pain, Daisy is still a damn good-looking woman. She noticed. You are a piece of work, she scoffed. I mustered up all of the mucous and blood that were collecting in the bottom of my throat and spat it into her faceI refused to be intimidated by this crazy broad. At least, I refused to show her how frightened I truly was. I had to keep cool, stay defiant. She barely reacteddidnt even flinch. She just reached into her coat pocket and pulled out a red handkerchief, wiped her face and shoved it into my mouth, tying it in there with a piece of rope her goon was carrying, gagging me. I guess until you learn to behave you can keep quiet, she said, coldly. FMMF FOO! I shouted through the gag. She nodded to her goon who clocked me again. What did I just say about behaving? Teach him a lesson, Petey. The goon stepped forward malevolently and proceeded to give me the most painful makeover anyone has ever experienced. When he finished, he pulled the gag out. My beautiful face, I gasped, fighting just to stay half-conscious, as my eyes began to swell and my nose began to bleed worse than the stab wound in my side. Shut up, Daisy spat. Enough with the tough-guy crap! Now listen here: I have a few questions I need answering, but not necessarily by you. It would be infinitely easier, for both of us, if you would just cooperate here and now. But if you spit in my face, try to bite me, try to even blow me a kiss, I swear I will not hesitate to end your miserable life right here. Are we clear? I nodded, dropping the tough-guy act. Okay, she said, smiling that perfect smile of hers, bouncing around perkily again. Lets get started.

By Bobby Dillon
Assistant Editor

Comics Roundup: What Not to Read

I realized recently that I havent yet warned you away from anything. Admittedly, that is because I absolutely love comics there is not much in the world of graphic narrative that I dont find appealing or interesting in some way but there are two series that I feel are not worth your time or money: Frankenstein, Agent of S.H.A.D.E. and Deadpool Kills the Marvel Universe. Allow me to begin with the lesser of two evils: Frankensteins monster is a cultural icon. There are few figures in popular culture that are more identifiable, and putting him together with a team of similarly iconic monsters (werewolf, mummy, vampire, etc.) and having them fight even mightier monsters is a COOL idea. Unfortunately, the first six issues wallow in mediocrity. These issues are written by Jeff Lemire (who you may remember from a previous issue as the great mind behind the current Animal Man series, and the creator of the critically acclaimed Sweet Tooth) and drawn by Alberto Ponticelli. Knowing Lemires work as I do, it is disappointing that this series starts off so poorly. Ive only read the trade paperback which collects issues one through six, before the creative team was changed, but the series is off to a pretty rocky start. Essentially, the team is made up of familiar tropes that were done previously (and far better) in Hellboy and BPRD. In fact, it seems as if the team is merely a palette-swap of BPRDs, as the characters are essentially the same, but without the vibrancy and heart that our friends at the Bureau of Paranormal Research and Defense possess. Now we come to the ultimate insult to the intelligence of the comics fan, the perfect example of the kind of artless, cynical, pandering cash-grab done in the name of fan service that is becoming ever more prevalent in todays nerd culturethe Duke Nukem Forever of the comic book world, if you will: Deadpool Kills the Marvel Universe. I know what you must be thinking: Oh, but I love Deadpool. Hes so funny, and he has guns and swords! And yes, you are correct, Deadpool is AWESOME. I know this; you dont have

to remind me of his guns and swords, split personalities, and clever wordplay. I know hes hilarious. But this series is crap. Deadpool has been stripped of his subversive, ridiculous personality and humor, and what settles for a plot in this series literally only

World War III: A Futurist Response to William Wordsworths Written in Early Spring An Original Poem by Di Ann Duffey Vulich
Man in his hands took all man; Bringing to Earth such degrees of destruction, Thundering wreckage, unleashed on the land. (Massively deafening annihilation.) Hegemon stole all our Common BeliefFreedom! and Liberty! Dignity! United we toppled- Commander-in-Chief, Insure domestic tranquility! Floods of repulsive warm blood, flesh, and marrow

STAY AWAY!

Art by Dalibor Talajic

Drowned Man in vomitus pools of great sorrow. Now, Mother Earths embroiled in heat, Screaming for water from miserly clouds. The cracked, parched beds of the sea, Her children-- dressed in their funeral shrouds. Carbon and ash left where life was aboundNothing is left but a poisonous hazeChemicals leaching down deep in the ground, Noxiously gaseous fumes in a blaze. Yesterdays skies are tomorrows PerditionEgotist Man and his Final Solution!

exists so that Deadpool can spout clichd one-liners in between decapitating Mr. Fantastic and Captain America. The ultimate insult, however, is that the front page of issue one declares that we demanded it! This, of course, is bull I never asked for anything this badly written (thank you, Cullen Bunn) or this poorly drawn (thank you, Dalibor Talajic). Frankenstein has some redeeming qualities, and at least manages to tell a somewhat cool story and establish a mildly interesting arc (though it does so sloppily, it should not be forgotten), Deadpool has NOTHING good going for it. I cannot, in good conscience, tell you NOT to pick up Frankenstein, Agent of S.H.A.D.E., Vol. 1: War of the Monsters, because there is true EFFORT there (though I can tell you to give Hellboy and BPRD a look before doing that). Deadpool Kills the Marvel Universe is the oppositeI wouldnt recommend it to my arch-nemesis.

RIVERS EDGE WIU-QC

Continued from Page 8

IDEAS Short Story Contest

MORE NEWS YOU CAN USE

December 7th, 20125

The politician takes center stage, his name known to all functioning citizens in the nation. He is clean-shaven, routinely blotched with special powder to hide the non-human pores necessary for the machine inside the cranium to breathe. It is just after eight-o-clock and the building is quiet. A man, the founder of the company, enters the entrance floor, not saying a word to the woman receptionist. She is already absorbed in one of the televisions across the room above empty seats in the lounge area. His loud footsteps do not disturb her. The man enters the elevator shaft and rises to the sixteenth floor. Upon exiting the elevator he turns left twice, then goes straight down. The hall is cold and gray while dim lights help him to his destination.Walking casually through a large door, the man starts a daily hum down another hall. He ceases as he reaches a second large door. Another television can be heard from inside. A hard smile goes out to the immediate crowd while a warmer, stronger one goes into the live camera. There is no need for the man to clear his throat; it has been pre-lubed and adjusted to perfection. His caring eyes shine like the sun. Twelve employees are crowded around a massive television, some of them talking quietly while others examine the facial expressions and calculated, fluid movements of the figure appearing on the screen. They are very happy with the event so far. Others, who are not part of the observing group, are standing in more specific locations on the floor. They have not moved all night. A sign of great fatigue shows on each of their faces and in their body postures as they meticulously operate handheld devices and navigate through large amounts of data displayed on the walls. Their work has only just begun. They are there to make sure the politician continues to run smoothly throughout the event. The founder stands idly by, watching as his men and women maintain the mechanical man doing their bidding. I will be your new president. I will be the best president there ever has been. I will be the best president there ever will be. He is programmed to believe it, just as well as his audience. His human opponent believes it, too. A father sitting in front of his television set at home smiles broadly. He, just like ninety percent of the country, is ecstatic to see he chose the winner. His daughter lies on his lap looking into his face from below, learning. The founder of the new politician production company is pleased with his first product, as are his many rich investors across the world. He did it. The things to come can only be positive for him and his new business, as every conglomerate of corporations will want this new kind of politician for their own. Today, the president of the United States; tomorrow, congress. And soon thereafter, every political figure in the world.

3rd Place: A New Kind of President - By Matt Alden Brown

Assistant Editor

By Cait Bodenbender

Celebrations of Light
honor of Wang-Mu, the Empress Mother of Compassion and Wisdom. According to Taoist tradition, Wang-Mu is the ultimate manifestation of Yin energy, which is passive, and cold. Wang-Mus festival day marks the peak of the Yin half of the year, which now begins to give way to the active and hot Yang half of the year. Followers of the Shinto religion celebrate Tohji-Taisai, on December 22nd, as well. The holiday honors the sun-goddess Amaterasu. According to Shinto sacred story, long ago Amaterasu feuded with her brother, the storm god Susano-o. Out of anger she hid in a cave, causing the world to be plunged into darkness. She had to be enticed out with music and dancing. Tohji-Taisai festivities honor her coming out of the cave and returning to the skies. Christmas, as you know, falls on December 25th. On this day, Christians celebrate the miracle of the incarnation of God as the infant Jesus. Though, historically, Jesus of Nazareth was not born in December, by the 4th century C.E. leaders of the Western church had moved the celebration of Christs birth to coincide with the Winter solstice. The symbolism of pairing the birth of Jesus with what many pre-Christians considered the birth of the sun is obvious just as the sun brings physical light to the world, Jesus brings spiritual light to the world. The move also allowed the church to incorporate pagan solstice ritual and tradition into Christian worship, making the conversion of European pagans easier. Many Eastern churches have also moved their Christmas celebrations to coincide with the Winter solstice, but some have not. For such Orthodox Christians, Christmas falls on January 7th. Kwanzaa, which is celebrated from December 26th to January 1st, is not a religious holiday. Rather, it is a cultural holiday meant to strengthen the African American community and other communities of the Pan-African Diaspora. It was created by Dr. Maulana Karenga in 1966 and has seven core principles, which are unity, self-determination, collective work and responsibility, cooperative economics, purpose, creativity, and faith. Observance includes celebrations of African heritage, art and culture and culminates with a feast and the exchanging of gifts. Happy Holidays!

SGA

from page 1

Its December, and the days are getting shorter and shorter. The Winter solstice falls on the 21st, when the day and night will be of equal length. Although the very next day begins the lengthening of our days, it will be a long time before it feels like the sun has returned. Lets celebrate a festival of light, shall we? It will help us through the coming months of cold and dark. Here are a number of them, from which you can pick: December 8th is Bodhi Day, on which Buddhists the world over celebrate the enlightenment of the Buddha as he sat under a Bodhi tree. Personal observances of this inceptive event include hanging colorful lights and/or placing a candle in the home and lighting them every night for 30 days (the lights and flame both symbolize enlightenment), and decorating a fichus tree (in lieu of a Bodhi tree) with lights and ornaments. The 8th through the 16thof December marks the Jewish festival of Chanukah, also called the Festival of Lights. Chanukah is not a major festival in its traditional observance, but it has become the most popularly recognized Jewish holiday because of its proximity to Christmas. According to the Talmud, there was not enough sacred oil for the rededication of the Holy Temple in Jerusalem during the second century BCE. In order to purify the temple, the menorah had to burn for throughout the night, every night. Although there was only enough oil to burn for one day, it miraculously burned for eight. An eight day festival, during which candles in a nine-branched menorah called a Hanukia are lit while prayers are said, was declared to commemorate this miracle. In America and Israel, Chanukah festivities also include the giving and receiving of gifts. Contemporary pagans celebrate will celebrate Yule on December 21st, giving honor to mother goddesses and the sons/suns they birth on the solstice. Yule celebrations are very similar to Christmas celebrations, which isnt particularly surprising many of the traditions most associated with Christmas have been borrowed from pre-Christian European pagan Yule traditions. Yule logs and decorated pine- trees, for instance, were part of pre-Christian German solstice observance. Pagans often hold rituals on the night of the solstice, and exchange gifts. On December 22nd, Taoists hold festivals in

should not be more than 4 hours a month. Ms. Barnes, a graduate of The Ohio State University, went on to note that At our last meeting the on November 28th only four people were able to attend and two of whom are people who will be graduating this Fall. According to the SGA Constitution every student organization needs to have a participant at these meeting, it not just so they have to work for SGA but also so that they can report on what their organizations are doing and a greater opportunity for group collaboration is possible. When asked if the student organizations budgets could be affected by a failure to attend SGA meetings, Ms. Barnes was quick to point out that, While the student organization budgets have never been contingent on their attendance at these meeting, SGA has not been able to help fund those organizations who have not been able to tell us what they are doing. She says shes hopeful about having each organization send representatives in the spring, with each organizations specific niche help fulfill a specific role for the SGA. This organization can really help all the othersby acting as liaison between the groups and the Quad Cities at large. I dont think that we will take up a lot of anyones time and we are really giving students the chance to participate in the management of their own affairs. Students interested in joining the SGA should stop by SGA office, or email SGAQC@WIU.EDU with any of their questions. We are also holding dedicated Office hours from 3-4:30 Monday thru Thursday at both 60th street and Riverfront campuses.

In their efforts to maintain a form of self-government which will work for the students, faculty and staff, to provide student opinions with a voice concerning the traditions, ideas, and affairs of the University, another of SGAs goals was to begin actively seeking new SGA members prior to the start of the next semester. In an email SGA Comptroller Holly Barnes explained why SGA was going into the classrooms the week following Thanksgiving. We are trying to recruit members. We are telling people that SGA is a leadership organization, which looks great on your resume, will ask for less than an hour a week, and has paid talent grants. Then we are asking people to come to the SGA office (either 60th street or riverfront) to pick up an application and ask more questions. All SGA asks of you is participation in one project a semester, and two meetings a month. The total time commitment

6 December 7th, 2012

Upon Further Review Obscure Netflix Review: Eat Drink Man Woman

RIVERS EDGE WIU-QC

Assistant Editor

By John Hartley

To continue my series of reviews of movies that are available on Netflix that are worth watching (and which you likely havent heard of or seen already), I wanted to do something different from the more violent, in-your-face film that I picked the last time out (Bronson). You cant get much more different from Bronson than Ang Lees 1994 film, Eat Drink Man Woman. If theres one thing that Netflix has an abundance of on its streaming video service, its foreign films of high quality. Well, thats not entirely true; Netflix also has a ton of good documentaries, but well ignore that fact for now. Ive heard a lot of people lament the lack of newer blockbusters in Netflixs streaming selection, but I think part of the charm of the service is that you end up watching really good films, documentaries, or television shows that you wouldnt necessarily have encountered otherwise. Anyway, in the interest of full disclosure, I didnt discover Eat Drink Man Woman on Netflix. I saw it years ago as part of a course in a previous college I attended, back when I was not exactly excited at the prospect of watching anything with subtitles. Really, I have to give credit to Eat Drink Man Woman for showing me that there are worse things than having to read lines of dialogue off of the screen- such as missing out on really good movies entirely. Eat Drink Man Woman is a charming story of an aging Chinese master chef named Chu. Chu is a widower and lives with his three daughters, who are also single for various reasons as the story begins. The oldest daughter is a school teacher who just had a relationship end badly, the second oldest is heavily involved in her career, and the youngest is only 20 years old and has not yet been interested in pursuing a serious relationship. As the story begins, we find that Chu is having a very serious problem for a master chef- he feels that he is losing his taste. No, I mean he literally thinks he cant taste food as well as he used to. It seems to be a metaphor for growing older, and definitely seems tied to his reluctance to move on and have a meaningful romantic relationship of some sort. Hes growing older, and the loss of taste could just as easily be the loss of hair, athletic ability, or (ahem) his ability to perform sexually. In other words, his problem is one of being afraid to get old, while worrying that he is somehow becoming less of a man as he ages. If that sounds a little too Film Studies 101 for you, dont worry. You can read a lot into the plot and work out some pretty interesting themes and thought-provoking messages, but you absolutely dont have to if you dont feel an inclination to. Really, the movie is a light-hearted one, full of good-natured humor and what is essentially four separate tales (that of the three daughters and the father himself ) that have parallels that are clear and enjoyable to follow as the story continues. The really interesting thing about Eat Drink Man Woman is how the dynamics of the family change as each character undergoes their own personal journey (which of course, necessarily involves a new romance). The acting is top-notch, with Sihung Lung (Chu) doing a particularly

good job with his role as a father who is concerned for his daughters as they embark upon new relationships, but also feeling as if he is inexperienced in the game of love himself, as well. If the name of the films director, Ang Lee, sounds familiar, thats because he has gone on to direct many notable films that you have likely seen before (or at least heard a lot about). Among his best-known works are 2001s Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, the infamous Brokeback Mountain (2005), and this years well-reviewed Life of Pi. Oh, he also directed the rambling, overly long Hulk in 2003, but lets not hold that against him. The action scenes were fun, and he at least tried to do something different with the use of moving comic panels within the film. Anyway, this is a much different Ang Lee, as a family drama doesnt

provide breathtaking scenery of Alberta, Canadas Cowboy Trail or the spectacular imagery of choreographed mid-air kung fu battles. Still, Lee shows a deft eye in this film, allowing us to watch like a fly on the wall in some scenes and framing the characters with close-ups when needed. During the family dinners, he smartly allows us to take in the entire scene, including the many plates and bowls of delicious-looking gourmet food. Eat Drink Man Woman is an entertaining, fun film.The story is lighthearted and optimistic, yet packs enough realism in its three-dimensional characters and family conflicts that it doesnt come across with the vibe of a cheesy sitcom. Despite the cultural barriers, the themes are transcendent, and much of the humor carries over extremely well, too. Overall, if youre not afraid of a few subtitles, this is a film that you wont regret spending a couple of hours watching.

By Jason Kuna
Staff Writer

Christmas Themed Theater in the Quad Cities

It runs December 13th thru the 22nd. Weekend matinees at 2pm and nightly at 8pm. Tickets $15. Call 309-235-1654 or visit districttheatre. com for more details and tickets. Two other performances of A Christmas Carol are running from December 14th thru the 23rd. One in Coralville, Iowa (319-5412980) and the other in Des Moines, Iowa (www.desmoinessocialclub. com). The Complete Works of William Shakespeare (Abridged) what is sure to be another awesome Prenzie Players performance of written by Adam Long, Daniel Singer, and Jess Winfield and directed by Catie Osborn. On one night only Saturday December 29th, and for only $5 at The Establishment Theatre you are sure to have a rip roaring, knee slapping good time with WIU-QCs favorite group of actors and actresses! Visit prenzieplayers.com, establishmenttheatre. com, or call 309-786-1111 to get your tickets today!Tickets can be reserved by calling the Establishment Theatre at(309) 786-1111 or by visiting their website at www.establishmenttheatre.com . Tickets are $5. Portions of the proceeds will benefit Gildas Club Quad Cities. For more information visit www.prenzieplayers.com.Tickets can be reserved by calling the Establishment Theatre at(309) 786-1111 or by visiting their website at www.establishmenttheatre.com . Tickets are $5. Portions of the proceeds will benefit Gildas Club Quad Cities.

Looking to take the family or that special someone out to a great Christmas play? Here are three classics all being performed here in the Quad Cities: The Nutcracker presented by Ballet Quad Cities December 8th at 1pm and again at 7:30pm and December 9th at 1pm at the Adler Theater in Davenport. Features live music by Orchestra Iowa. Tickets are on sale now via the Adler box office and Ticketmaster ranging between $12 and $35. Miracle on 34th Street at the Circa 21 Dinner Playhouse in Downtown Rock Island. Several show times between now and December 30th. Ticket prices - $28.22 and $47.55. 309-786-7733 or circa21.com for more details and tickets. A Christmas Carol at The District Theatre also in downtown Rock Island. This performance is a new musical version of the Charles Dickens classic adapted for the stage by Danny White and Tristan Tapscott.

RIVERS EDGE WIU-QC

WESTERN 411
rough Finals?

December 7th, 2012 7

What is Getting You

Editor-in-Chief

Student Photo Poll Asks:

SGA Offers Stress Management Opportunites

Staff Writer

By Aaron Graf

By Hayleigh Covella

Just pushing through so I can get past it and say, Yeah to the A! -Patrick Olson ,BLAS

Each semester, WIU-QC hosts a Manage Your Stress Week around the time when student stress is at its heightfinals week. This year, the Student Government Association is hosting the event. Activities will be available at both the Riverfront and 60th Street campuses the week before finals, December 3rd through the 6th. Manage Your Stress Week will kick off at 60th Street on Monday the 3rd. From 3:00 P.M. 5:00 P.M., there will be free snacks and nutritional information as well as board games, puzzles, and music in Rooms 102A and B. During this time, free massages will also be offered in Room 102C and there will be a Wii available for gaming in the lobby. On Tuesday, Manage Your Stress activities will move to the Riverfront campus and will be available from 2:00 P.M. 6:00 P.M. In Room 111, there will be free snacks, nutritional information, and free massages. There will be an X-Box set up in Room 118, and in the Lobby, there will be a representative from Ancient Wisdom Acupuncture. Wednesday takes MYS week back to 60th Street, where from 3:00 P.M. 5:00 P.M., the snacks and games will be in Room 109, the free massage in room 108, and the Wii will still be in the lobby. On Thursday, the final day of MYS week, the snacks and massages will be back in Room 111 from 2:00-6:00 P.M. There will be a free Yoga class in Room 118 from 3:00 P.M. 4:00 P.M. After the Yoga class, the X-Box will be set back up in Room 118 from 4:00 P.M. until 6:00 P.M. There will also be self-defense training occurring on the Riverfront campus in 30-minute sessions from 1:00 P.M. 3:15 P.M. on Tuesday and Wednesday where students will learn self-defense using the Wing Chun discipline from Sifu Joe Caffery who uses this discipline to train federal law enforcement. For those looking for a more physical way to manage their stress, there will be 30-minute sessions of Les Mills Bodyattack on Monday from 3:00 5:00 P.M and 30-minute sessions of Les Mills CXWorx on Tuesday and Thursday from 10:00 A.M. 12:00 P.M. Dont forget to take advantage of these many ways to manage your stress and good luck with finals!

Im trying yoga, and I will be venting about my professors to my fellow students! -Ashley Ehrecke, BLAS

I go back over old assignments and gure out what I need to improve on so I can do that much better on the nals. -David Bracke, Engineering

I like to use contemplative prayer, and writing just for the fun of it. -Maria Schrup-Peterson, EIS Graduate Student

PUBLISHING AND CIRCULATION The River Edge is published bimonthly during the regular school year, excluding holidays, finals week, and semester breaks.

COPYRIGHT 2012 No reproduction or reuse of material is permitted without written consent of the Rivers Edge. All rights reserved. To request permission to reprint any material from this publication, Please e-mail us at RiversEdge@wiu.edu. The Rivers Edge does not knowingly accept articles that discriminate on the basis of sex, race, creed, religion, color, handicapped status, veteran or sexual orientation,The Rivers Edge is a free publication. One copy per student.

How To Contact the Rivers Edge: Stop by the Rivers Edge office at the 60th street campus and leave a message. Check us out on Facebook @ www.facebook.com/RiversEdgeNewspaper Via e-mail: Riversedge@wiu.edu Vist Our Website rivers-edge-qc.com

CORRECTIONS AND CLARIFICATIONS Help us maintain accuracy. If you find a factual error let us know by contacting us at the Riversedge@wiu.edu subject line should read corrections and retractions.

8 December 7th, 2012

IN CONCLUSION

RIVERS EDGE WIU-QC

IDEAS Short Story Contest Winners

At the beginning of the semester IDEAS (the Interdisciplinary English and the Arts Society) sponsored a short story contest and challenged our readers to submit essays that were five hundred [500] words or fewer in length and in honor of everyones favorite political pastime, the recent presidential election. Without further delay the Rivers Edge proudly announces that Caressa Clearman eared first prize for her essay Puppy Kicking. As promised the Rivers Edge has published Ms. Clearmans essay, but because of their fine efforts, the paper wished to acknowledge all those whos work was submitted for judging by publishing their essays here also.

1st Place: Puppy Kicking - By Caressa Clearman

Congressman Smith says he supports the proposed Animal Welfare Bill, but actually he likes to kick puppies She grabbed the remote and hit the pause button, cutting off the voice coming from the TV. On the screen was a picture of her candidates opponent, fully clad in his red power tie and navy blue suit, frozen in a punting motion and aiming his right foot at a sleepy, fluffy, little brown puppy. Wait! What? she exclaimed, We cannot run this ad! She looked around the large conference table, confronting the expressionless faces staring back at her. You guys, she repeated, we cannot run this ad. Obviously, this is photo shopped. We dont know that this man kicks puppies. The man next to her slid the remote from her hand, flipped back to regular television and turned the volume down to a low murmur. Well, he countered, we dont know that he doesnt kick puppies either. Oh, you have got to be kidding me, she sighed heavily, and began rubbing her temples. Her mind drifted back to when she had started as a campaign manager. She had been eager, idealistic. Shed believed in the candidates shed supported. She wanted their messages to be clear, and she wanted people to know the issues at hand and exactly where her candidate stood on each matter. How had it come to this? How will the people know our ideas? What we support? What were against? She looked pleadingly around the room. Clearly, a young woman from the other end of the table spoke, were against kicking puppies. That that thats not a thing! she stammered angrily. No one is for kicking puppies, you twit. Look, she paused and took a deep breath, we have a message that the public needs to hear. There are issues at hand that affect each and every one of us every single day. Dont you people want to know the candidate you support? Dont you think you should know why youre voting for them? She searched their faces for some spark of agreement, some twinge of recognition. Finding nothing, her eyes strayed to the TV. Their opponents newest commercial had just started. There, on the screen, was her candidate, one of his hands holding a tiny, orange, puffball of a kitten while the other hand was balled into a tight fist. His face bore an evil, maniacal smile. Below him were the words, in capital, bold, block letters: JACK JONES, HE PUNCHES KITTY CATS. Oh, for the love of she didnt finish her sentence, she couldnt. Instead she threw her hands into the air and brought them back down in time to catch her falling face. A full minute passed as she tried to collect herself. Then she spread her fingers and peeked through them to see the blank faces staring at her. Run it, she whispered, quiet and defeated. If the American people want to know the beliefs of these candidates, I guess its up to them to figure it out themselves.

2nd Place: National Anthem - By Aimee Tacey

The man opened his eyes and turned to look at the clock. The LED lights flashed 4:50 AM. He awoke at this same time every day, exactly ten minutes before the nation-wide alarm. If he had any emotion left, he would be amazed by the accuracy of his biological clock, but since he was dead inside, he just groaned his distaste for the morning and instinctively checked his ear plugs. They were solidly in place, no worries. No worries? He almost chuckled at such an absurd thought. His life was nothing but worry. He constantly worried about being discovered, or that he might jump out the 13th story window of his apartment, but mostly, he worried that the never-ending loneliness was going to careen him uncontrollably over the edge of sanity. Now, as he lay tensely aware of the muted tick-tock of the national clock, he worried about his ability to handle what this country had become. It seemed so long ago,during that fateful election, whenthe population still thought for themselves. Everyone had been in a naive uproar over the incapability of the candidates. What he wouldnt give for either of them now, but back then, when the third party popped up out of nowhere, no one gave the original two candidates another look. Everyone stupidly jumped on the novel bandwagon. The control began almost immediately. It took one oblivious week for the immense loud-speakers to go up on every corner of every block throughout our once great nation. During this time, any device that impeded soundmysteriously vanished. Anyone with a hearing impairment disappeared without a trace. He had worked construction, so he always carried a pair of earplugsin his pocket. When the speaker went up on his corner, instinct told him to insert the plugs and keep them in until he found out what noisewould bellow from such an enormous contraption. The first alarm blastedat 5:00 AM the next morning. He didnt know it at the time, but that moment was the end of democracy in America. Subliminal mind control, disguised as the National Anthem,pulsedthrough the ears of every person in the country. There were a few others like him, who had anticipated the auditory signal and had leftover means to block it, but free will is difficult to hide. Those still in possession of their thoughts were quickly discovered and converted. He was sure he was alone, that he was the only civilian left in control of his own mind. He was imprisoned by senselessness, with no hope and no future. He glanced at the clock. The time was down to 4:59. The loneliness was so heavy. It pressed down on him. He knew he could no longer endure it. He sighed in defeat, closed his eyes,and pulled the plugs from his ears. Before the clock flipped, he was able to whisper a few, last, free words. I pledge Allegiance to the flag of the United

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