My Early Years In Thailand When my wife and I lived in Pattaya, my relationships with the people I met ther e were

very informal. It was like being at a beach party where everyone is weari ng a skimpy bathing costume. It is hard to be overly formal when you are more th an half naked and in party mood. Not that the girls or I wore bathers in town, it is just that the atmosphere in Pattaya is so friendly. Furthermore, most of the men are there for the girls and most of the girls are there for the men. To be unfriendly in such a situation w ould be pointless. I knew my wife there as Neem, which she translates as 'Slow', but the dictionary gives as 'Gentle'. 'Easy Going' might be a better translation. Her cousin gave her the name because nothing phased her and nothing would make her go faster tha n she wanted to. Neem introduced me to all her girlfriends and they all - dozens of them - adopte d me as an instant friend just because Neem liked me. In turn, Neem was never je alous when her friends sat on my lap to talk to me or kissed me on the cheek to say hello or goodbye or just for the sake of it. Many of the girls were hundreds of miles from home and were quite lonely, especi ally for a man they could trust not to grope them whenever they came within reac h. I know that many, if not most, men miss out on this friendliness because they misinterpret it. After 18 months of this idyllic life style, we moved to the village where Neem w as born. It was like stepping out of the sea and into quicksand or coming back o ff holiday and going straight back to work. That sounds bad, but I don't actuall y mean it as bad. A Thai village is real Thailand, where real Thais have families and family probl ems; work and problems at work. Village life is much more formal. I have never s een a woman wear a short skirt or a bathing costume in the village. School girls wear calf-length skirts, but change into shorts as soon as they get home. Women wear calf-length slacks or full-length sarongs, because it is consi dered rude or impolite to show a lot of skin. In the West, formal gowns are often backless and decollete, arms are bare and so are shoulders. In Thailand, the more formal the occasion, the more skin you sho uld hide. The same goes for men. Foreigners are allowed to get away with a lot of faux pas in matters like this, except where it concerns religion, a Wat (church or temple) or monks. I have liv ed in the village for seven years now and I am still not expected to 'behave pro perly', because I am foreign and deemed not to understand. However, my wife does not allow me to get away with as much as others would. The second change I noticed was that Neem reverted to her schoolgirl nickname of 'Je-o', which means 'Good Girl' or 'The Real Thing' (like Coca Cola!). I don't have a well-known nickname, like all Thais do, but then I don't take that as a s ign of non-acceptance. My wife can't resist the Thai nicknaming habit though and calls me 'Ma Ba', whic h literally means 'Mad Dog', but officially translates as 'Wolf', because all do gs seem to like me. <a href="http://behind-the-smile.org/wordpress/">Behind The Smile</a> : ISBN: 97

8-1-475-21688-2 : Published by CreateSpace 19-4-2012. Try: <a href="http://whati sreligiousbelief.com">What is Religious Belief?</a>.