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Jayplay

nuns-t0-be
best friends prepare to enter convents after graduation page 5 april 05, 2007

naked in the snow...


and other theme parties page 7

singing for the big-J

christian students worship at open swim page 13

talk to the hand

because your hands are talking back. page 10


and laura evers remembers the years she spent wearing a brace to correct scoliosis. page 19

Like most young Americans in the early 1990s, I spent an inordinate amount of time thinking about and eating gummy bears. Red, green, yellow I didnt discriminate. My gummy bear habit was largely harmless until one night when I was carrying a small glass dish of the candy and tripped, cutting the palm of my hand. My gummyrelated injury prevents me from having my palm read accurately, but if yours is scarfree, check out Dani Hursts Put Up Your Dukes on page 10, where she explains what your hands say about you.

note.

tABLE

F
13
05 10

ONTENTS
13
feature 10 out 13

07 19

09

15

contact 05 notice 07

A FriENdShip LikE NuN OThEr ThEmEiNg ThE NighT AwAy


Throw a party with a twist Fixing your phobias

Two students take the path to the convent together

puT up yOur dukES guiTArS ANd grAcE


people 15

What your hands say about you

Worship through music at Open Swim

health 09

FighTiNg ThE FEAr


PHOTOGRAPHERS MCGUYVER STUFF Amanda Sellers Anna Faltermeier HEALTH GOOD FOR YOU Lindsey St. Clair Kim Wallace Elyse Weidner PEOPLE KNOW EVERYONE Sam Carlson Jennifer Denny Anne Weltmer OUT HIT THE TOWN Matt Elder Courtney Hagen Jaime Netzer

BigS ANd LiTTLES

Dave Ruigh, co-editor


JAYPLAYERS
EDITORS MAKIN IT HAPPEN Becka Cremer Dave Ruigh CLERK GETS AROUND TOWN Michael Peterson DESIGNERS MAKE IT PRETTY Katherine Loeck Bryan Marvin
ON THE COVER: ILLUSTRATION/ ANNA FALTERMEIER

Big Brothers Big Sisters volunteers

CREATIVE CONSULTANT FOUR SEA CREATURES Carol Holstead WRITE TO US jayplay07@gmail.com JAYPLAY The University Daily Kansan 111 Stauffer-Flint Hall 1435 Jayhawk Blvd. Lawrence, KS 66045

NOTICE TAKE NOTE OF IT Laura Evers Dani Hurst Katrina Mohr CONTACT HELP YOUR LOVE LIFE Matthew Foster Nicole Korman

02 JAYPLAY 04.05.2007

VOLUME 4, ISSUE 25

Ca l e n d a r
Pride Week Continues. For details, visit www.kuqanda. org/pride.

THURSDAY

april 05

Walk-Ins Welcome Friday. Spencer Museum of Art, 10 a.m., FREE, www.spencerart. ku.edu. Brown Bag Drag Tunes at Noon. Union Plaza, Kansas Union, 12 p.m., FREE, www. kuqanda.org/pride.

FRIDAY

april 06

Free Pool. Bottleneck, 38 p.m., 21+, FREE. The Last Call Girls/Lillibelle. Record Bar, 4 p.m., www. myspace.com/thelastcallgirls.

SATURDAY

april 07

Theater: Antigone. Lawrence Arts Center, 2:30 p.m., $6 w/ student ID, www.eat.ku.edu.

SUNDAY

april 08

Free Pool. Bottleneck, 38 p.m., 21+, FREE. Theater: Keely and Du. William Inge Memorial Theatre, Murphy Hall, 7:30 p.m., www.kutheatre. com.

TUESDAY

april 10

VENUES

where?

Gallery Exhibit: The Neighborhood Show. Signs of Life, 10 a.m.11 p.m., FREE, www. signsoflifegallery.com. Eight local artists work will be on display. Free Pool. Bottleneck, 38 p.m., 21+, FREE. UMKC Jazz Matinee. Mikes Tavern, 6 p.m, 21+. Theater: Keely and Du. William Inge Memorial Theatre, Murphy Hall, 7:30 p.m., www.kutheatre.com. Jazz Ensemble. Robert Baustian Theatre, Murphy Hall, 7:30 p.m., FREE. Last Laugh Comedy Jam. Beaumont Club, 8 p.m., 21+. Theater: Antigone. Lawrence Arts Center, 8 p.m., $6 w/ student ID, www.eat.ku.edu. Joe Moss Band. Knuckleheads Saloon, 8 p.m., 21+, $8, www. myspace.com/joemossband. Particle/Boombox. Granada, 8 p.m., all ages, $12, www.myspace. com/particle. Stephen Marley. VooDoo Lounge at Harrahs Casino, 8 p.m., 21+, $21, www. stephenmarleymusic.com. The Burning Fifteen. Mikes Tavern, 9 p.m., 21+, www. myspace.com/theburningfifteen. County Road 5/Ben Miller Band. Hurricane, 9 p.m., www. myspace.com/countyroad5. Poker Pub. Conroys Pub, 9 p.m., FREE, www.thepokerpub.com. J.B. Beverley and the Wayward Drifters. Daveys Uptown Ramblers Club, 9:30 p.m., 21+, $5, www.waywarddrifters.com. Within. Jazzhaus, 10 p.m., 21+, $3, www.myspace.com/ withinpaul. KJHK Farmers Ball: Coat Party/Ample Branches/ Suzanna Johannes/KTP. Jackpot Saloon, 10 p.m., 18+, $24, www.kjhk.org.

Carillion Concert. Memorial Campanile, 5 p.m., FREE, www. carillon.ku.edu. Chess Night. Henrys on Eighth, 7 p.m., FREE, all ages. Poker Pub. The Pool Room, 7 p.m., FREE, www.thepokerpub. com. Galactic. Granada, 7 p.m., all ages, $16, www.galacticfunk.com. Tyrese. Beaumont Club, 7:30 p.m., all ages, $33, www.myspace. com/tyreseg. Brew Jam. 75th Street Brewery, 8 p.m., www.75thstreet.com. Head to Kansas City, Mo., for the citys longest-running acoustic show. Brutal Knights/Hopeless Destroyers/The Rich Boys. Replay Lounge, 10 p.m., 21+, $2, www.myspace.com/ brutalknights.

Beaumont Club 4050 Pennsylvania St. Kansas City, Mo. (816) 561-2560

Free Pinball. The Replay Lounge, 36 p.m., FREE, www. replaylounge.com. Free Pool. Bottleneck, 38 p.m., 21+, FREE. Red Lefty. Jackpot Saloon, 6 p.m., all ages, www.redlefty.com. Shemekia Copeland. Knuckleheads Saloon, 8 p.m., 21+, $18. Neko Case. Liberty Hall, 8 p.m., $15.50 adv./ $18.50 day of show, www.nekocase.com. Cory Ryan/Tanner Walle/Evan Jacob. Granada, 9 p.m., 18+, $10, www.coryryanmusic.com. The Ponys/Deerhunter/Rent Money Big. Record Bar, 9 pm., 21+, $8, www.theponys.com. Walter Alias/GSD/Another Holiday. Hurricane, 9 p.m., www. myspace.com/walteralias. Matt Ludwick/The Feed/No Purpose. Boobie Trap Bar, 9:30 p.m., all ages, $56, www. myspace.com/mattludwick. Trampled Underfoot. Jazzhaus, 10 p.m., 21+, $5, www.trampledunderfootks. com. Kylesa/Genghis Tron/Lethe. Replay Lounge, 10 p.m., 21+, $2, www.myspace.com/kylesa. Its Over/The Popsicles/Pixel Panda. Daveys Uptown Ramblers Club, 10 p.m., 21+, $6, www.myspace.com/ itsoverkansascity. KJHK Farmers Ball: Young Tree/The Kinetiks/Attack on Uranus/Wood Roses. Jackpot Saloon, 10 p.m., 18+, $24. Out of the Suffering/ Dollhouse Rumor/At the Left Hand of God/Molechise. Mikes Tavern, 21+, $7.

Theater: Keely and Du. William Inge Memorial Theatre, Murphy Hall, 5:30 p.m., www.kutheatre. com. DJ Skus Block Party. Granada, 7 p.m., 18+, $5. Devil Wears Prada/The Calico System/A Day to Remember. Grand Emporium, 7:30 p.m., all ages, $10, www.myspace.com/ tdwp.com. Two Ton Boa/31 Knots. Mikes Tavern, 8 p.m., 21+, www. myspace.com/2tonboa. DJ AM. VooDoo Lounge at Harrahs Casino, 8 p.m., 21+, www.dj-am.com. Theater: Antigone. Lawrence Arts Center, 8 p.m., $6 w/ student ID, www.eat.ku.edu. Chick Willis/Hambone. Knuckleheads Saloon, 8:30 p.m., 21+, $10. Rob Scheps/Ed Neumeister Quintet. Blue Room, 8:30 p.m., 21+, $10. The Away Team/Super Black Market/The Threes. Hurricane, 9 p.m., www.myspace.com/ theawayteamkc. Mr. Marcos V7/The Brody Buster Band/Left E. Grove. Jackpot Saloon, 9 p.m., 18+, www.myspace.com/mrmarcosv7. Four Star Alarm/Brilliant Geographers/Brian Maloney/ The Great Harbor Rescue. Hurricane, 9 p.m., www.myspace. com/fourstaralarm. Poker Pub. Conroys Pub, 9 p.m., FREE, www.thepokerpub.com. Cosmic Bowling. Jaybowl, Kansas Union, 10 p.m., FREE. The Eric Mardis Group. Replay Lounge, 10 p.m., 21+, $2. The Esoteric/Open Hand/The Thieves. Record Bar, 10 p.m., 21+, www.myspace.com/esoteric.

Club Wars XII Qualifier: Hectic/Ten Thousand One/Afterburn/Censura. Grand Emporium, 9 p.m., all ages. Anberlin/Bayside/Jonezetta/ Meg & Dia/Life in Jersey. Granada, 9 p.m., all ages, $15, www.myspace.com/anberlin. She Swings, She Sways/ Evan Sathoff. Boobie Trap Bar, 9:30 p.m., all ages, $56, www.myspace.com/ sheswingsshesways. Los Craptaculares/Deadwood Derby/The Legendary Terrordactyls/The Old Black/ The Havok on Polaris. Replay Lounge, 10 p.m., 21+, $2, www. myspace.com/loscraptaculares.

Bottleneck 737 New Hampshire St. Lawrence (785) 841-5483 The Brick 1727 McGee St. Kansas City, Mo. (816) 421-1634 Fatsos 1016 Massachusetts St. Lawrence (785) 865-4055 Gaslight Tavern 317 N. Second St. Lawrence (785) 856-4330 Grand Emporium 3832 Main St. Kansas City, Mo. (816) 531-1504 Harbour Lights 1031 Massachusetts St. Lawrence (785) 841-1960 Jackpot Saloon 943 Massachusetts St. Lawrence (785) 843-2846 The Jazzhaus 926 1/2 Massachusetts St. Lawrence (785) 749-3320 The Record Bar 1020 Westport Road Kansas City, Mo. (816) 753-5207 Replay Lounge 946 Massachusetts St. Lawrence (785) 749-7676 Signs of Life 722 Massachusetts St. Lawrence (785) 830-8030 Uptown Theater 3700 Broadway St. Kansas City, Mo. (816) 753-8665 VooDoo Lounge 1 Riverboat Drive Kansas City, Mo. (816) 889-7320

Free Pool. Bottleneck, 38 p.m., 21+, FREE. Rumblejettes. Record Bar, 6:30 p.m., 21+, FREE, www. rumblejettes.com. Poker Pub. Flamingo Club, 7 p.m., FREE, www.thepokerpub. com. Film: Who Killed the Electric Car. Woodruff Auditorium, Kansas Union, 7 p.m., $2. Theater: Keely and Du. William Inge Memorial Theatre, Murphy Hall, 7:30 p.m., www.kutheatre. com. Poker Pub. Flamingo Club, 10 p.m., FREE, www.thepokerpub. com. Ambulette/Eastern Conference Champions/Not Now Sleepyhead. Replay Lounge, 10 p.m., 21+, $2, www. myspace.com/ambulette. Open Mic Night. Bottleneck, 10 p.m., $2.

MONDAY

april 09

Free Pool. Bottleneck, 38 p.m., 21+, FREE. Chess Night. Aimees Coffee House, 7 p.m., FREE, all ages, www.aimeescoffee.tripod.com. Speaker: Robert F. Kennedy Jr. Lied Center, 7:30 p.m, ticket required. Yo La Tango. Granada, 8 p.m., all ages, $15, www.yolatango. com. The New Alligators. Hurricane, 8 p.m., www.myspace.com/ thenewalligators. Cory Branan. Daveys Uptown Ramblers Club, 8:30 p.m., 21+, $6, www.myspace.com/ corybranan.

WEDNESDAY

april 11

Superargo/Antelope/Well, Gentleman. Jackpot Saloon, 10 p.m., 18+, $6, www.superargo. com. JJ Grey/Mofro/Dubconscious. Bottleneck, 18+, $11 adv./ $13 at the door.

04.05.2007 JAYPLAY 03

RAINE REVIEWS NEWS YOU CAN USE

HAWK TOPICS
Authorities cApture shAuntAy henderson, the lone womAn on the FBis 10 most wAnted list, in KAnsAs city. Her crime? She was one of the original producers of the runaway ABC hit Greys Anatomy. Sigh someday, well get all of those bastards.

deMocraTic preSidenTial candidaTe hillary clinTon SeTS a fUndraiSing record by raiSing $26 Million in The firST qUarTer of 2007.
In other news, the Save the Children of Darfur charity fundraiser, collecting funds to help the thousands of children threatened by the horrible genocide in Sudan, failed to meet its fundraising goal of $10,000 for yet another quarter.

Los AngeLes prosecutors sAy they wiLL Ask A judge to revoke pAris hiLtons probAtion in A reckLess driving cAse, A move which couLd resuLt in jAiL time for the heiress.
And, just like that, the U.S. government discovers an ingenious new torture technique to be used in Guantanamo.

Osmond reportedly wants more freedom to pursue her washed-up-celebrity-turned-realityshow-star career as she strives to become the next Peter Brady.

HAS-been CelebrITy SInger MArIe OSMOnd AnnOunCeS THAT SHe IS dIvOrCIng Her HuSbAnd Of 20 yeArS.

sAn frAncisco city LeAders Approve A bAn on pLAstic bAgs.


As per the rules of the ban, the only legal use of a plastic bag is to wrap it over Paris Hiltons head and hold it there until she stops moving.

The UniTed STaTeS poST office UnveilS new STaMpS ThaT coMMeMoraTe The Star WarS MovieS.
If I ever get a letter with a JarJar Binks stamp on it, Ill burn it. I swear to God, Ill burn it.

a Maryland woMan claiMS her dog perforMed The heiMlich ManeUver and Saved her life afTer She began choking on a piece of apple.
According to the crazy woman, the dog then drove her to the hospital, filled out the necessary admittance forms and even wrangled with her insurance provider over language concerning her emergency-visits coverage.

The U.S. MarineS ban large TaTTooS below The knee or elbow, Saying ThaT SUch large, viSible TaTTooS do noT repreSenT The MarineS TradiTional valUeS.
But of course, sending Marines on multiple tours of duty to a war with no end in sight is still well within the realm of the U.S. governments traditional values. country singer wynonnA Judd Files For divorce From her estrAnged husBAnd AFter hes Arrested on chArges oF sexuAl BAttery AgAinst A child under 13. Although in Kentucky, the technical term for sexual battery against a child under 13 is dating.

Actress hALLe berry Admits thAt she Attempted suicide After her mArriAge with former bAsebALL stAr dAvid justice feLL ApArt.
Uber-hottie Halle Berry almost killed herself over this douche lord? Wheres the Justice? No, seriously, what happened to that guy?

THInK yOu HAve A beTTer jOKe? e-MAIl Me AT hawktopics@kansan.com. 04 jAypLAy 04.05.2007


Chris Raine

CoNtACt

A frieNdship liKe NUN other

PHOTO/SARAH LEONARd

Best friends on a path toward life at convents


by Nicole Korman
Eight years ago, Nicole Habashy sat in her high school honors English class passing notes to a guy one seat away. She didnt know it then, but the person who sat between her and her crush was her future best friend. Kristin Kennalley was quiet and Habashy was loud. Habashy introduced herself and invited Kennalley to a party at her sisters house. After talking at the party, the two clicked. Neither woman ever expected their friendship to lead to a shared passion for religious life. Habashy, Wichita junior, says that when she and Kennalley first became friends, neither thought they would enter the religious life. Both were rebellious teens with other plans for the future. Habashy thought one day she would be a CEO and Kennalley wanted to teach physics. Kristen thought about being a nun first, and then I saw how happy and peaceful she was and that helped me with my decision, Habashy says. Kennalley, Wichita senior, first thought about becoming a nun when she was in fourth grade. Then, after attending a Catholic college for two years, she transferred to the University of Kansas to experience life outside of Catholic schools. She also studied in Rome, where her desire to become a nun became more assured. The more I get to know myself, the more I see it as a desire in my heart, Kennalley says. Habashy says she didnt think about becoming a nun until later in life. When she was little, she always saw herself getting married and having 12 children. Big families always seemed more fun than smaller families, Habashy says. They can entertain themselves. But by becoming a nun, Habashy realizes she will be able to touch more lives than she would with a family of her own. Habashy says her time at KU has strengthened her desire to become a nun. Shes learned from the sisters at the St. Lawrence Catholic Campus Center, 1631 Crescent Rd., that nuns are regular people with their own struggles. Habashy, like other nuns before they took their vows, has gone on dates, but says nothing ever worked out the way she thought it would. My biggest complaint was I didnt think anyone could reciprocate the intensity of my affection, she says. Father Zachary, a priest at St. Lawrence, says theres something special about Habashy and Kennalley. He says most women on campus would never have thought of becoming a nun, let alone taken the steps to visit a religious community. He believes what they are doing is countercultural and that their support for each other is what helps them through their journey in faith. The hardest part for them is going to be to keep looking forward and to not get distracted by well-meaning people, he says. Together, Habashy and Kennalley have visited religious orders in New York and other places around the country, and each woman is looking for an order to fit her own personality. There are things that theyre going to have to give up when they become nuns and join their separate orders, but their friendship is not one of them. Kennalley jokingly says she will miss her iPod and Habashy will have to give up smoking cigarettes. Both agree that giving up men and marriage will be difficult. Kennalley says her experience in Rome helped ease her fears of leaving her friends and family. I dont have anything to lose, just everything to gain, she says. For Habashy, Kennalleys experience also proved to her that their friendship would last forever. Habashy says that the two only talked twice while Kennalley was in Rome, but she felt closer to her because she knew they had an unspoken bond. They have a deeper friendship; its a spiritual one,
CONTRIBUTEd BY KRISTIN KENNALLEY

Kristin Kennalley and Nicole Habashy plan on joining convents after they graduate. Father Zachary says. As for their families,the women say they are slowly coming to terms with their decisions. My parents are starting to realize that Im serious about this decision, but it will take time for them to come around, Habashy says. Kennalley says her parents became very supportive of her after they saw how happy she was in Rome. Habashy and Kennalley will soon give up going on dates and passing notes to guys, but they say theyll never give up their friendship. It helps to have a friend like Nicole to talk to who understands what Im going through, Kennalley says.

04.05.2007 JAYPLAY 05

Guy 1: Im hot. Guy 2: Youre hotter than hot. Youre ice cold! Guy 1: I dont think thats how the song goes.

WESCOE wit
Guy 1: Oh man, that paper totally screwed me. How about you? Guy 2: Yeah, me too. Guy 1: What grade did you get? Guy 2: I got a D. How about you? Guy 1: (Laughs) I got an A. I just wanted to see what you got. Girl: Where you goin? Professor: To my other class. Girl: (Gasp) Shame on you for not telling me you had another class.

Guy: I need to get some Marbolos... Malboros... Whatever. Girl: Some what? Guy: You know, the cigarettes. Girl: Thats not what theyre called. Youre an idiot. Guy: Shut up, Im foreign!

Girl 1: Hey, whats the capital of New England? Girl 2: Um, I dont think thats a state. Girl 1: Of course it is. Where do you think the New England Patriots are from? Girl 2: Oh, maybe youre right. Maybe its Boston

Dani Hurst

tOmOrrOWS
Whether youre an artist who wants somewhere to showcase your work or just someone who appreciates art, the Web site Red Balloo.ning is worth checking out. Dominic Sova, Red Balloo.ning creator, hopes the site will become a central location for people to see the work of local artists. To set up an account, head to http://redballoo.ning. com and submit your name

news

and e-mail address. From there, artists can post their paintings, photography and other art online. People can come and share and find each other on the Web site, Sova says. If you have access to a computer, you can easily find out about independent shows in Lawrence. So far, only about 50 artists are using the site, but Sova hopes this will change soon.

Red Balloo.ning also hosts art shows around Lawrence. After a successful show in February, Red Balloo.ning will host Fresh Produce, on April 23 at 6 p.m. on the third floor of Tellers, 746 Massachusetts St..
Laura Evers

Dont Stand IN LINE


BUY ONLINE

GO ONLINE PARKING PERMITS

1. LOG onto the Kyou Portal 2. CLICK on the Services tab to sign up 3. CHECK your mail Permit will be mailed to you!
06 JAYPLAY 04.05.2007

STEP PROCESS

Annie Greer walked into a room full of Cowboys and realized she was the only Indian. Dressed in a feathered headband, face paint and a bright red shirt, Greer, Boulder, Colo., senior, quickly became an easy target for the darts shot by all of the Cowboys in the room. Luckily, she had a bow that fired arrow darts, so she fought back despite the overwhelming odds. Theme parties are a way for students to break up their typical weekend routine and do something different with their friends. They also allow people to connect over a common interest, says Sharon Brimmer, creator of the party planning Web site themepartiesnmore.com. Many themes, such as decades or pop culture, bring back memories, and this nostalgic aspect helps people come together, she says. When picking a theme, it helps to look around and think about options that are easy to carry out, Brimmer says. Books, movies, colors, pop culture, seasons and time periods all make for good theme ideas. Resist the temptation to be lazy and use clich themes, such as the toga party, that have been done too many times already. Let your mind wander and choose something that is personally interesting. As long as people are excited about it, the party will be a success, she says. Anything and everything

Themeing The nighT away


Partygoers describe how themes transform house parties into something memorable
by Katrina mohr
can be a theme, Brimmer says. It just depends on the mood or message you want to convey. The Cowboys and Indians party had a rowdy mood, but Greer says every theme party shes been to has had its own atmosphere. Shes attended 80s Prom, Anything but Clothes,Tacky Christmas Party, Black, White and Shiny (a New Years Eve party), Nerds and Eurotrash parties. Most of the theme parties have let her and her friends act like kids again, especially the Nerds party because everyone was asked to bring something for Show and Tell, she says. One of her favorite parties was Anything but Clothes because everyone got really into it and had creative outfits, she says. One of her guy friends wore only strategically placed stickers, and two of her girl friends wore feather boas. Greer wore wrapping paper. It was fun to see what everyone came up with, she says. Every time one of our friends would walk into the party we would all crack up because of what they were wearing, especially when one of my guy friends walked in wearing a trash bag as a man thong. Its important to have a theme that both sexes can dress for thats out of the ordinary but not too specific, Greer says. The Eurotrash party she went to was a bad theme because no one understood what they were supposed to wear. Most people just wore clothing that clashed, Greer says. Joe Slattery, St. Louis junior, agrees that the theme needs to be creative but easy enough to dress for. Slattery and his three roommates hosted Rumble in the Jungle, CEOs and Office Hos, Naked in the Snow and Play in the Hay theme parties last year. It took some trial and error and a lot of effort to plan and host a successful theme party, but Slattery says the theme parties were more fun than other house parties they had because their friends got more involved. The only party they had

nOTiCe

Play in the Hay, Cowboys and Indians and Naked in the Snow are a few of the themes that can make house parties more fun.

Theme ParTy TiPs


Look for decorations and costumes at discount stores or thrift shops, or borrow from friends and family. Tell people the theme early so they have time to prepare. Prepare ahead of time so you can have fun at the party, too. Use subtle and prominent decorations to carry the theme throughout. Source: Sharon Brimmer, creator of themepartiesnmore.com

problems with was Play in the Hay. For decoration, Slattery and his roommates covered the floors of their house with hay. Some of the guests were so allergic to the hay that they had to leave the party, and it was a mess to clean up the next day. The hay was bad news, but we still joke about it, Slattery says. The band that played still refers to it as the Black Snot party because of how it affected people. One of their more successful parties was Naked in the Snow because it was easy to dress for. Most people showed up in swimsuits or underwear and wore snow boots, scarves, gloves, goggles and hats, Slattery says. Some women see theme parties as an excuse to come scantily clad, but Slattery found that more girls dressed up for their

parties when the theme wasnt blatantly sexual. Some girls take themes in a sexual way regardless of whether its Pimps and Hos or not, but if the theme is more random, such as our Play in the Hay party, girls will still dress sexy but they wont feel put on the spot, he says. Terra Cummings, Sioux Falls, S.D., junior, says she prefers random themes to those aimed at making girls wear skimpy clothes. Theme parties are better than regular house parties because people get into character, play a role and get to wear something they dont wear every day, she says. Ive never gotten dressed up for a theme party and had a bad time, she says. Theyve always been hilarious and fun. Cummings has attended Ugly Sweater, Prom, Pairs and Wear the Ugliest Thing You Can Find themed parties. For the Wear the Ugliest Thing You

Can Find party, Cummings and a friend came up with the theme while shopping at thrift shops on Massachusetts Street. They kept joking about buying odd and hideous items of clothing and decided that it would make a good theme, she says. One of Cummingss girl friends wore a purple jumpsuit, and one of her guy friends drew himself a fake mustache and wore mechanic overalls and a mullet wig. Not many people showed up because they planned the party only a few days before, but Cummings says it was still fun because she and her friends really got into the theme and took plenty of silly pictures together. Although Cummings enjoyed the theme parties where all the guests were her close friends, she says that large theme parties are an easy way to meet people and are less awkward than regular house parties.

Everyone has the same vibe at theme parties, so its not intimidating to approach strangers when theyre wearing ridiculous outfits, Cummings says.You always have something to talk about and everyone is at the same level. As for the uneven battle between the Cowboys and Greer, the two sides fought with plastic toy weapons and chased each other through the hosts house. They had to stop because they ran out of darts and were laughing too hard to continue. Other Indians eventually arrived and evened out the costume distribution, but Greer says she didnt mind everyone else ganging up against her. Everyone dressed up and had a much better time playing than if they were just standing around drinking. Thats what makes theme parties fun and successful, she says.

04.05.2007 JAYPLAY 07

health tip
olive oil: no longer confined to the kitchen
One product that can soften your cuticles, condition your hair, moisturize your body, diminish sun damage to your skin and serve as a shaving product is sitting in your kitchen. Extra virgin olive oil, rich in vitamins and antioxidants, helps soften skin without leaving behind clogged pores, extra grease or an overwhelming scent, says Alex Fiori, owner of Salon Di Marco & Day Spa, 733 Massachusetts St. Fiori, a native of Italy, where people have been lathering up with olive oil for hundreds of years, says when it comes to at-home beauty remedies, our grandmothers were ahead of their time. Vitamin-rich olive oil has also proven to be a successful treatment for inflammatory skin conditions such as eczema and psoriasis, she says. By simply carrying that bottle of olive oil from the kitchen to the bathroom, you can cut down on the money spent purchasing multiple bath and beauty products. Instead of using shaving creams, gels or soaps, spread olive oil on your skin before shaving to prevent over drying or irritation of the skin as a result of the razors exfoliating action. Also, after massaging a few tablespoons of olive oil into your hair, Fiori says to let it sit for up to an hour before shampooing to help repair split ends and eliminate dandruff by softening the scalp.
Elyse Weidner

that's disgusting

Swimming can make you Sick


Germs in pools and natural bodies of water put swimmers at risk for eye, skin, stomach and respiratory problems. Dont be fooled by the clear blue of a sparkling spring lake or a newly opened pool. Contaminants from rainwater runoff, sewage and human and animal waste can pollute these waters enough to cause diarrhea, infections and rashes if you swallow the water, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Always shower before getting into the water. Your butt has about 0.14 grams of feces on it (even after wiping), which can contaminate public pool water. Though pools are chlorinated, it takes up to an hour for chlorine to disinfect the pool. Some bacteria that cause diarrhea take longer to kill. You only have to swallow a small amount of tainted water to be at risk for diarrhea. It is especially important to avoid swallowing natural water because it is not chemically treated. Avoid swimming after rainfalls because the rain can move animal droppings on land into the water. And please, dont pee in the pool. Source: Centers for Disease Control Kim Wallace

how wemet
08 JAYPLAY 04.05.2007

on again, off again

Ashley Guerrero, Topeka junior, and Richardo Becerra, Kansas City sophomore, spoke briefly at the new student orientation in 2004. They met again at the University block party and became friends through HAWK Link activities and by working together at The Market in the Kansas Union. The following summer they had a week-long fling, but Becerra says he had mixed feelings about getting back with Guerrero. At one point in time, I didnt like her, he says. At other points in time, she was my best friend. Becerra eventually came around and he and Guerrero have been dating for two months. Matthew Foster

fighting the fear


Where phobias come from and how they can be treated

heaLth

by Lindsey St. Clair


I remember standing there says Steve Ilardi, associate as my preschool classmate, a professor of psychology. Being pale-faced boy about 4 years old, afraid of something is normal, walked up and started talking but a phobia is an excessive and to my teacher. What he said unjustified fear that interferes was inaudible, but Ive never with a persons ability to function been able to socially. Being afraid of forget what People who happened next: Something iS normaL, But have phobias He vomited all a phoBia iS an exCeSSive tend to become over a pint-sized anxious and and unjuStified fear fearful when wooden chair. It looked like that interfereS With theyre around a melted cookiesa perSonS aBiLity to particular object and-cream ice or situation, or funCtion SoCiaLLy. cream. I never they try to avoid sat in one of that object or those chairs in my classroom situation completely, says David again. Holmes, professor of psychology. Since that day in preschool, These are real fears that really Ive had a fear of vomit, a disrupt peoples lives, he says. phobia clinically known as My heart races whenever I emetaphobia. see, hear or smell vomit, or if Ten percent of Americans the arrival of vomit is imminent have a phobia of some kind, (as when someone is sick or extremely drunk). I get a feeling in my stomach like Im on a roller coaster, and I tense up and break into a nervous sweat. Patroiophobia: Fear of heredity There are at least three different ways to develop a phobia, Ilardi says. In some cases, phobias develop spontaneously. There is also evidence to suggest phobias are related to genetics and can be inherited. Identical twins are more likely to share a phobia than paternal twins, and people who are adopted are more likely to share phobias with their biological parents than with their adoptive parents, Ilardi says. Sophophobia: Fear of learning In other cases, phobias can be learned, or picked up from a trusted individual who has a phobia. Ilardi once treated a patient who developed muriphobia a fear of rodents after seeing her mother jump on the familys kitchen table when a mouse came in the room. From that moment on, he says, she was terrified of mice. Phobophobia: Fear of fear Phobias can also be classically conditioned if a stimulus is paired with a fear one or more times and the two become connected. Ordinarily it takes a number of trials to classically condition a response, but if the experience is very powerful, you can get whats called one-trial conditioning, Holmes says. When Shawn Lillig, Basehor senior, was 15 years old, he bought an amplifier for his band. The first time he stepped up to the microphone, he felt an electric shock in his teeth that knocked him to the ground. Now he uses a towel, book or broomstick to flip on metal light switches, and pulling chains to turn on light bulbs makes him woozy, he says. He also uses a wooden spoon to retrieve Pop Tarts from his toaster. Trophobia: Fear of doctors Phobias can be treated through a process known as graded exposure, which has a success rate of over 90 percent, Ilardi says. First, the most upsetting triggers or features of the object or situation are identified. Then, a psychologist can construct a hierarchy of stimuli, starting with something

PHOTO ILLUSTRATION/SARAH LEONARD

that is uncomfortable but not traumatizing. You might put a snake in a box outside my door and slowly but surely, over the course of a number of trials, bring it in until Im sitting there petting it, he says. Exposure-based treatment is not as bad as it sounds. People are usually thinking you do like a Fear Factor and make them just overwhelmed with exposure, and its not that at all, Ilardi says. Whenever people complain of nausea or a stomach ache, I flee. When my roommate had the flu last year, I had to stay at a friends place. I also get really anxious around people who are drinking. I have a few friends familiar with my condition who lead me away when they see people getting sick or looking suspicious, but I think I might need to look into graded exposure.

04.05.2007 JAYPLAY 09

Put uP your dukes


by Dani Hurst

a guide to understanding the silent language of hands.

Your hands are talking about you and you probably dont even know it. Theyre saying all kinds of things, blabbing about your secrets. But dont feel betrayed this is completely normal. By examining your gestures, physical

characteristics, handwriting and palms, experts can analyze, with a certain degree of accuracy, aspects of your current state of mind, health and personality. They can even delve into the secrets of your destiny. Look at your hand. Turn it over and follow the lines of your fingers and palm. Most likely, you cant read the information thats written there: the number of children you might have, how many relationships youll be involved in, and if youll ever find your perfect career. That is where Ellie Crystal comes in. Crystal, a New Yorkarea intuitive researcher and coauthor of Sarah and Alexander: The Alchemy of Time, says that a palm print is a theoretical blueprint of a persons life experiences. Every single thing that you do who you are is on your hand, Crystal says. If you know how to properly read a palm, you can know a persons destiny. Everything about the hand is important, Crystal says. She assesses the presence or absence of certain lines on the palm, the depth of these lines and the length of the fingers. And instead of using the standard method of simply examining a clients palm, Crystal uses ink prints of her clients palms to make a more detailed and accurate reading. She takes the clients dominant hand the one with which he or she writes rolls black ink on the palm and makes two prints. The first always turns out darker and the second one lighter, allowing Crystal to make a more accurate reading. There are four main lines on the palm: the heart line, the head line, the life line and the career line. While these are the four main lines of the palm, Crystal says that the lines appear over time.Younger people have not fully developed yet, so they will most likely have less defined lines, and some lines might still be absent. Your fingers are also very telling, Crystal says. She takes into account everything from the length of each finger and relative size to the amount of space between the fingers of an open palm. Each finger, like the lines of the palm, has its own classification: thumb (Venus), index (Jupiter), middle (Saturn), ring (Apollo) and pinky (Mercury).

What your fingers say about you


One of the primary ways experts can assess an individual is by studying hand movements and gestures. Hands in motion are a dead giveaway of what a person is feeling at any given moment to an expert like David Givens, director of the Center for Nonverbal Studies and author of The Nonverbal Dictionary, though stationary hands are just as telling, he says. Hands are naturally expressive because they are so in-tune with what the rest of the body is doing and feeling, Givens says. The brain is making everything happen, Givens says. By looking at the movements of the hand, you can open a window into the brain. Two of the most basic gestures are the palms-down and palm-up poses, which reveal a lot about a persons confidence level and conviction. The palmsdown stance is one of assertion and domination, Givens says. It conveys stubbornness: Politicians often use a palmsdown hand position to project confidence during speeches and debates. The palms-up position, on the other hand, is a softer and friendlier gesture. It is related to the shoulder

the human hand is a great fidgeter, it rarely ever stays still david givens, director of the center for nonverbal studies
shrug and projects a level of uncertainty. It is a pleading sign that opens up a connection with an audience and allows the speaker to ask for a little help. Like the shrug, its a type of crouching pose used to cower away from danger, or, perhaps in this case, just a dangerous conversation. Basic gestures like these are universal, Givens says, which is why they are so easily understood, interpreted and mimicked. Fidgeting is also easily analyzed, and, according to Givens, a natural behavior for everyone. The human hand is a great fidgeter, Givens says. It rarely ever stays still. And these movements, like the ones accompanying speech, have meanings behind them: fidgeting usually conveys nervousness, anxiety and stress. The most common type of fidgeting is known as self-touching, a built-in consolation mechanism. It works by diverting attention away from the pain or stress of one part of the body by stimulating another part of the body. Givens cites the example of a person rubbing a spot that is sore or has just been injured. It doesnt make the pain go away, he says. You just make the pain compete for attention. Givens puts this idea in context for University students, setting the scene with a professor questioning a student in front of a large class. The student will hesitate at first, Givens says, and will then probably touch his or her neck before answering. This selftouching is a way for the student to draw attention away from the source of the stress, almost like performing acupuncture or hugging himself. Regardless of the ultimate message, Givens says its always better to use gestures than not. Gestures help animate the words youre speaking and help the audience remember important points. They express personality as well, and make a conversation more personable.

The heart line, which is the topmost crease, identifies your sensibilities and reveals things like whether you are overly romantic or controlling in a relationship. The branches at the end (toward the pinky) show the number of marriages one is likely to have, while ovals along the line indicate breakups and romantic challenges. The head line is the next crease down from the heart line, and it shows your potential for education and intelligence. If, for instance, it stretches all the way across the palm, Crystal says that means you will attend and finish college (so look closely, seniors). The life line starts between your index finger and thumb, and curves around the thumb. Crystal says this line indicates length of life and whether you will face any major obstacles.

The thumb, or Venus, is first in line and can reveal a persons capacity for flexibility. If its straight and vertical, then you are more stubborn and unyielding. If the thumb bends more, then you are more subtle and forgiving. The index finger, or Jupiter, is what Crystal refers to as the most important finger of the five. This finger reveals your strength in life, as well as self-esteem, leadership, organization and even punctuality. If its longer than the ring finger, Crystal says that you are strong and determined. If, however, its shorter, then you are more easily bossed around and you dont stand up for yourself often. The middle finger, or Saturn, comes next in line and, among other things, speaks to your potential in the business world. A long Saturn finger indicates that you work well with numbers and are serious

about finances. A shorter Saturn finger tells Crystal that you are a little riskier, especially with money. The ring finger, or Apollo, finger represents an individuals creativity. If you have an Apollo finger that is longer than the Saturn finger, you are a person that is inclined to enjoy the arts and you are a more romantic individual. A shorter Apollo finger is indicative of selfmotivation but can also denote a selfish nature. And last, but not least, is the pinkie finger, or Mercury. This finger, though small, is important to those who take communication seriously. It can indicate, for instance, whether you are a good writer by how long it is in relation to the Apollo finger: If Mercury does not reach or barely reaches the top line of the Apollo finger, you are probably not a naturally good writer. Crystal says that of all the great writers and directors shes met, they have all had especially long Mercury fingers.

VE

NU

The fate or career line, which goes straight from the base of the middle finger to the wrist, reveals whether you will find a job in your desired field. Crystal says that not everyone has a chosen career and that the career line is especially absent from younger peoples palms. Your passion for your career shows in both the depth and the width of this line.

CONTINUED ON PAGE 12

10 JAYPLAY 04.05.2007

04.05.2007 JAYPLAY 11

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 11

Almost everyone here at the University can remember time spent in middle school, when nothing was written in anything other than cursive. Some teachers even said that in high school cursive was the only acceptable form of writing and nothing could be turned in written in print. Almost everyone here also probably remembers the first time they found out that this was a huge lie. Once in high school and now in college many students discovered that as long as their handwriting was legible, teachers were happy to accept writing in either form. Most people kicked the cursive habit once out of junior high, but the methods of teaching students how to write in cursive are pretty uniform across the board. This is important when looking at graphoanalysis (handwriting analysis) because its a science based on variation. Essentially, its a field of study that reveals facets of peoples personalities by investigating their handwriting and analyzing

how it differs from the standards originally taught. A handwriting sample can tell a lot about a person, says Dan Aldridge, a handwriting analyst. People learn handwriting basically the same, Aldridge says. Its the deviations you make that give away the clues we need. The best handwriting samples are written in cursive. Cursive flows better, Aldridge says. Its freer and allows your true self to come out. There are 108 basic traits of handwriting, but not everyone expresses all of them, Aldridge says. Two of the main characteristics are pressure and slant. Pressure is the amount of force exerted on the writing utensil, and it can both measure physical energy and gauge a persons senses. For instance, a person who exerts more pressure when writing is more likely to enjoy spicier foods, louder music and more extreme sensations. A person who writes softer, then, is someone who

is likely to enjoy more modest sensations. The slant of the letters can assess an individuals emotional responsiveness. For example, a slight forward slant is indicative of a sympathetic person who reaches out and tries to make connections with others. A far forward slant indicates that someone is extremely emotional and often reacts quickly and vigorously to events (and, according to Aldridge, this group would include many of the wild fans you might see at basketball games). An upright or nearly vertical slant tends to signify a more objective person, one who does not lean too far either way. Another characteristic of handwriting is size. Aldridge says that bigger handwriting usually denotes a person who looks at the bigger picture and is less concerned with details. Smaller handwriting, then, points to a person who focuses on details rather than assessing the overall scenario. Compatibility testing for

couples is another service available through scrutinizing handwriting samples. Aldridge says he looks for the dominant traits in each sample and evaluates whether these qualities mesh well with one another. Aldridge says that when people come in to see them, they often have an inaccurate view of themselves. He cites an example of a married couple he once analyzed. Every time Aldridge would explain what a certain aspect of the husbands handwriting meant, the husband shook his head and disagreed. The wife, however, affirmed that everything was true. The accuracy of a reading depends on the experience and quality of the analyst, Aldridge says. He estimates that he is about 85 percent accurate in his analyses. He says hes been told both that he was completely correct and that he was completely wrong. Regardless, Aldridge would tell any skeptic to write something down and let him take a look at it.

12 JAYPLAY 04.05.2007

03

GuitArS ANd GrAce

Out

At Open Swim, worshippers get down with God


by Jaime Netzer
The band will be great. And hell get to see his friends. But Jesse Kangas, Lenexa freshman, isnt at Open Swim for either of those reasons. Tonight, Kangas wants to worship God through song. About 75 students and a handful of adults who share Kangas desire will join him at Open Swim, a multidenominational Christian worship service held monthly in the Kansas Union. Open Swim is not about the words and talents of the band, or the pastor who leads the service. Its about how worshippers use language and song to communicate their love to Jesus Christ. Kangas smiles a lot. Hes outgoing and unafraid to approach strangers. Hes attending KU on an Army ROTC scholarship and keeps his red hair buzzed. Sometimes, when he goes to worship events like this one, Kangas feels like the people leading the events are just going through the motions. Sometimes, he feels like he is just going through the motions. But tonight, Jesse wants the real thing. He wants a conversation with God. The lights dim and the band, the Pool Boys, strike their first guitar chords. The lyrics are projected onto a screen behind them, and the crowd begins to sing with the man and woman on stage. Not to us, but to your name be the glory An older man running the soundboard unleashes his strong bass voice. His toes

PHOTOS/ mARLA KEOWN

OpeN Swim iS NOt AbOut the wOrdS ANd tAleNtS Of the bANd, Or the pAStOr whO leAdS the Service. itS AbOut hOw wOrShipperS uSe lANGuAGe ANd SONG tO cOmmuNicAte their lOve tO JeSuS chriSt.
remain rooted to the ground, but his heels bounce with every beat of the drums. He emphasizes specific lyrics by raising his arms and pointing his fingers. The band plays songs with major chords in keys that are easy to sing. The female vocalist on stage sings with her eyes closed; when shes not singing, she retreats from the mic stand, clasps her hands in front of her chest and bows her head in prayer. After the bands first song, the guitarist asks the crowd to bow their heads and pray with him. God, were going to sing our guts out for you. We ask that you know how much we praise the amazing God that you are. Were going to try to put that in words. Amen. The Pool Boys play several uptempo songs and the audience is on their feet. A few people choose not to sing, but countless bold voices come from every part of the room. Some participants have their arms in the air. After several songs, the band begins to play quieter, slower music and encourages the audience to engage in a conversation with God. Every Open Swim were quiet and we get real with God. We know were

sinners and we take this time to ask for forgiveness. Take a minute and talk to God. The crowd sits and bows their heads. Confessions are made. Forgiveness is asked for. Kangas sits down and begins his talk with God. Hes dressed in athletic shorts and a vivid blue Royals T-shirt. The other students in attendance tonight are also dressed informally. The atmosphere is relaxed, yet focused. Being here feels different from being in a church, although a church is exactly where Open Swim started. Danforth Chapel was the original home of Open Swim, which began in 1997. Tyler Clements, drummer for the Pool Boys, says that a few of his friends wanted the chance

to sing songs together and worship. Clements and his friends wanted a way for all campus Christian groups to come together to form a larger Christian community. Eventually the group outgrew the tiny chapel, so Open Swim moved, first to Wescoe, then to its current home in the Union. The original music written by Clements and his friends moved their peers. Contemporary Christian music is often used in youth ministry because music brings up emotions nothing else can, Clements says. For a younger person, sometimes music is what gives you your identity, he says. And singing with a group of peers is powerful. Nathan CONTINUED ON PAGE 14

04.05.2007 JAYPLAY 13

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 13 Markley, Open Swim organizer, knows the people around him are bonded because worship is a part of their lives.I feel connected to everyone, he says. Being young and a devout Christian isnt always easy. When people say college is the best four years of your life, theyre usually not referring to worship services, says Chad Donohoe, college pastor at Grace Evangelical Presbyterian Church, 3312 Calvin Drive. Donohoe leads several worship services for college students and says that in many ways, todays culture with the Christian way of life. Thats one of the reasons Kangas makes it to Open Swim every month. He doesnt drink alcohol, plans on waiting until

marriage to have sex and has not yet kissed a girl. He says he will not date someone unless he thinks he could marry her. These choices make Kangas decidedly different from many of his peers. So he comes to Open Swim to be around friends who are resisting the same temptations. He says he doesnt think he could do it by himself. There are times when I feel like getting wasted, Kangas says. But it would be ridiculous to throw my scholarship away on something like that. My Christian friends are there to help me through those times. At the height of the Pool Boys popularity, over 500 students were coming to Open Swim every week. The Pool Boys released an album called Open

Swim and moved to Nashville to pursue music further. Today, most members of the Pool Boys have started families or full-time careers in ministry, but they often return to KU and only KU to play at Open Swim. Clements has moved back to Lawrence, so he regularly leads Open Swim with other local musicians. After Pastor Donahoe offers his last words and acknowledges that walking with Christ is not always easy, the musicians take the stage for one final song. Kangas hands are high in the air, and after the lights come up, hes all smiles. He helps the band unload some speakers from the stage and talks with friends. Kangas got what he wanted; tonight was genuine. Tonight, he connected with God.

fooD rEvIEW
slushy drinks
cherry arctic blast
Kwik Shop 1420 Kasold Dr. $0.94 (small)

The sunny and warm days of summer are here. Put on your flip-flops and shorts, sit back and cool off with a refreshing slush drink. Here are four choices for your drinking pleasure.

spangles cherry slush


Spangles 3420 W. Sixth Street $1.59 (Medium)

This drink is so sweet and syrupy it makes your teeth hurt. The cooling iciness does little to detract from the veritable root canal you experience with each sip of this fire engine-red slush.

This treat is smooth, fruity and slightly tart. Its light, cold and good for refreshing a scratchy throat on a hot day.

BEST: sonic minute maid cranberry juice slush


Sonic Drive-in 3201 W. Sixth Street $1.60 (medium)

als creamy blue raspberry alligator ice


Kwik Shop 1846 Massachusetts St. $1.50 (medium)

THIS WEEKEND
KJHKs annual local music competition, Farmers Ball, will hold its opening playoff rounds tonight and tomorrow at the Jackpot Saloon, 943 Massachussets St., at 10 p.m. Two bands will be selected from each nights performance to play during the finals Saturday night at The Bottleneck, 737 New Hampshire St. Guest judges and crowd response will determine the winners. Coat Party, Ample Branches, Suzanna Johannes and KTP play tonight. Wood Roses, Young Tree, The Kinetiks and Attack on Uranus play tomorrow. Matt Elder

This drink comes in a fun electric blue color. The fun doesnt last long, though, when the artificial fruity liquid of this drink is sucked out quickly from a straw, leaving only a plastic cup of dehydrated ice behind.

This is the best of the bunch because of its perfect liquid-toice ratio. Dont let the cranberry surprise you, this drink isnt too tart; instead, its the perfect mix of fruity refreshment. Its made out of real cranberry juice, so you can get in a serving of fruit while enjoying this icy treat.

Courtney Hagen

All rATINgS ArE ouT of A poSSIblE fIvE STArS.

14 JAYPLAY 04.05.2007

BigS anD littleS

people

Emily Bannwarth visits her Little, Cassidy, at Pinckney Elementary School. Rocky, Jay McMillans Little, plays flag football. McMillan has been Rockys Big through the Big Brothers Big Sisters program for a year.

Sibling relationships are always tough, but some students volunteer to take on the challenge.
by Jennifer Denny
Strolling into the Kansas Union after class in white tennis shoes, khaki shorts, a black Tshirt and a backward baseball cap, Jay McMillan, Olathe senior, should be the epitome of cool to any 8-year-old boy. But for Rocky, a second grader at Schwegler Elementary, McMillan is an unlikely friend. McMillan and Rocky have known each other for almost a year, ever since McMillan signed up to become a Big Brother through the Big Brothers Big Sisters program of Douglas County after his older sister encouraged him to begin volunteering. I could learn from them as well as they could learn from me, McMillan says. Every Thursday evening, McMillan picks Rocky up from the Boys and Girls Club where Rocky stays after school. After making the drive back to his apartment with his young friend, McMillan is content to play Guitar Hero until the duo takes a break for a healthy home-cooked meal. The three hours they spend together usually pass quickly as they play video games, visit the skate park or make homemade donuts. When their time together is up, McMillan takes Rocky home, where his two biological siblings are waiting. I like the same things a little 8-year-old does, McMillan says with a laugh over the activities he and Rocky do together. It may not be enriching all the time, but it gets him away from his other life. Rocky is one of more than 300 children who are matched with a Big Brother or Big Sister in Douglas County. McMillan describes his Little as reserved and hard to read, but intelligent, which frustrated McMillan at first because the childs displaced anger was an obstacle to overcome before they could build a friendship. McMillan doesnt hesitate to say that taking care of children can be difficult, but he says this experience has taught him how to deal with people from different demographics, like Rocky, who is half Caucasian, half Native American, and comes from a poor, single-parent home. The most frustrating moments for this Big come when Rocky seems unappreciative of the time hes carved out of his day to spend volunteering, McMillan says. Despite this difficulty, he recommends volunteering for the Big Brothers Big Sisters program, but only to some people those with patience and sensitivity. You need to not have expectations going into it, except that youre going to hang out with a little kid. Its not just a rsum builder, he says. Sarah Rooney, Case Manager Extraordinaire at Big Brothers Big Sisters of Douglas County, according to her business card, knows being a Big is an intense commitment. She looks for volunteers who are mature and grounded, but also creative and engaging with children. Kids dont like boring, she says. Teachers have taken note of this program and talk about the difference it makes in the classroom. Jane Phelps, a fifth grade teacher at Schwegler Elementary, 2201 Ousdahl Rd., has multiple students in her classroom who participate in either the community-based program where the Bigs and Littles participate in activities outside of school or a site-based program in which the Big visits the Littles school weekly for lunch or after-school activities. Having a Big Brother or Big Sister is one of the few highlights in many of our students lives, Phelps says. They look forward each week to spending time with this favorite person. Just having someone by themselves, to do something even just a little special, is a rare treat. Playing a

PHOTOS/JON GOERING

ChilDren in the Big BrotherS Big SiSterS program are:


...less likely to start using illegal drugs

...less likely to start drinking ...less likely to behave violently

...less likely to skip school Source: Big Brothers Big Sisters of Douglas County

46% 27% 52% 33%

game, going on a walk, eating lunch or just talking takes on a whole different importance with a Big. Compared to McMillans match, Emily Bannwarth, Independence junior, has a Little made in heaven. But it wasnt always that way. After a bad first experience with the program ended at the beginning of the school year, Bannwarth was still interested in being a Big, so she began the process of finding a new Little this semester. She is now matched with Cassidy,

a fun and spunky 9-year-old in the third grade at Pinckney Elementary School, 810 W. Sixth St. Bannwarth likes the one-onone interaction she gets with the child each week and finds it easy to develop a lasting relationship. She likes me. Shes excited when I come, Bannwarth says. She seems to appreciate that she has a Big she actually cares to have one. She shows interest and shes full of energy. Plus, her smile is contagious. Because Bannwarth participates in the site-based program as a Big in School, she visits Cassidy every Thursday at her elementary school. The pair eats lunch in the cafeteria and usually play games outside. Sometimes they escape to the classroom and play Connect Four or simply talk to each other about their favorite movies and books. The first time we hung out, she gave me a hug and said Thank you for coming, Bannwarth says. It was so cute. It touched my heart and I had tears in my eyes when I left. Even though Bannwarth is thrilled with her new match, she offers this advice for Big Brothers or Big Sisters with difficult Littles: Make an effort. You can only

04.05.2007 JAYPLAY 15

pull so much of the weight and sometimes matches dont work out. But instead of just letting it go and getting frustrated, work a little harder. Terry Johnston, a clinician who provides mental health services to the children and staff at Schwegler Elementary School, agrees that Big Brothers and Big Sisters have to work hard to make their match work, but it cultivates excitement and a sense of self-worth in the Little. A child was telling me about the field trip coming up and I asked them if this was going to be their best day of the week, Johnston says. They said the field trip was going to be fun, but their best day was Thursday. I asked why and they replied, Thats when my Big comes to see me. Without a doubt these volunteers, and the hundreds more like them in Douglas County, have made a lasting impression on their students. Whether its cooking with him or playing board games with her, Bigs help their Littles learn lessons about friendship, compassion and responsibility. The impact of these relationships isnt always readily apparent, but rest assured, volunteers, your work is appreciated.

GRAD CHECK
Kathy Daneman Year: 1998 Degree: Journalism Hometown: Lenexa
Back in the day: Daneman remembers going to the Replay Lounge on Fridays and says the $1 turkey burgers and free pinball made her day. She was a regular at Swing Nights on Sundays at the Bottleneck, where the DJ was wonderful. Daneman kept busy in school writing for the Jayhawk Journalist, an alumni magazine for journalism students, and contributed an article for the yearbook. The grad Life: After graduation, Daneman packed up and headed to Boston with a friend. She set up an interview with the head of Beacon Press, a book publisher. After being asked what her favorite books from the company were, Danemans picks which impressed the interviewer helped land

MUSIC THAT MOVES YOU


Listener: Allison Zych, Lenexa freshman Tune: Tim McGraw by Taylor Swift While pumpin the jams, she was: Going to her social welfare class She says: I just like country. Listener: Jessie Roberts, Overland Park junior Tune: Settle Down by Cartel While pumpin the jams, she was: Going home to get some lunch She says: Its good to walk to.

her the job. She had only been in Boston for about 16 hours, but she had already found employment. Today: Daneman works for Farrar, Straus and Giroux, a book publisher in New York City. As publicity manager, she puts together campaigns for authors, sends out their books in advance to magazine and newspaper editors and follows up with phone calls and e-mails. She says she enjoys working with highprofile authors and influencing

how the media is shaped. She says: Upon her arrival in Boston, Daneman says she experienced the favoritism local people showed toward the elite schools of the Northeast. But she says she soon found that the hard work she put in at the University of Kansas had prepared her well. That Midwestern work ethic really takes you a lot further, she says.
Sam Carlson

Listener: Marthe Turlington, Dallas freshman Tune: Star Mile by Joshua Radin While pumpin the jams, she was: Going to class in Lindley Hall She says: It just came on my shuffle.

Listener: James Coffman, Eudora sophomore Tune: I Dont Have to Wonder by Garth Brooks While pumpin the jams, he was: Heading to Eaton Hall He says: I like all music pretty much. I grew up listening to this.

Anne Weltmer

16 JAYPLAY 04.05.2007

03

BITCH +
It means hes an asshole. Or maybe hes testing you to see how youll react. Or maybe he just feels comfortable enough around you to discuss other peoples looks. Or maybe you could just ask him. In the end, your choices are to a) deal with it

My boyfriend is always looking at and talking about other woMen. i dont know what to Make of this. what do you think it Means? andrea, sophoMore
b) dump him and find someone with eyes only for you (at least in front of you) or c) try to change the behavior. Or you can even try all of the above. Just make sure the guy youre with is making you feel good. Otherwise, why are you with him?

moan

with Niloofar Shahmohammadi

i think iM falling for a girl in My cheM class. the probleM is, iM also a girl. i havent ever been with a girl, but i find Myself really attracted to her. we have a great tiMe together and were getting close, but i dont know if shes feeling the saMe thing or if she would be totally repulsed. should i risk it? anna, junior
You have to be willing to take the risk if you want to get results. Or the girl. Is it possible shell be totally disgusted and never speak to you again? Sure, its possible. But if she reacts like that, is she a true friend anyway? Definitely not. Be prepared for a potentially awkward encounter, but if shes a mature adult she should be able to say, Aww, well, Im flattered, but I actually dont feel that way just like , she would with a guy. Or maybe shell say, Wow! Id been feeling the exact same thing! Youll never know until you ask.

PRESENTED BY

iM a senior and have never had a boyfriend. iM panicking. i Mean, the older i get, the More liMited My on-caMpus options becoMe. for guys, when theyre seniors, they have the whole caMpus to pick froM. but as a girl, iM not really interested in dating freshMen boys. iM worried ill never Meet a guy. natasha, senior
Youre right, the laws of nature arent totally fair. Men can create babies until the day they die, but women dry up around 45. Old men (with money) end up with Playboy bunnies and Anna Nicoles, but theres no old hag with a Brad Pitt or a Dr. McDreamy. But maybe youre being a little too negative. After all, Demis not an old hag, but she did land Ashton, and the older womanyounger man thing is becoming more and more mainstream. So dont write off everyone younger than you. If you met a guy and hit it off and later found out he was a year younger, would that mean the connection you had wasnt real? No way! Second of all, there are plenty of available senior men on this campus. So quit thinking that just because youre getting older you dont have any options. There are nice guys all around you. And dont forget these two words: grad students.

p esen s r t

UC MN POI G
04.05.2007 JAYPLAY 17

Please send your questions and concerns to bitch@kansan.com

We Made This Ourselves


Music
Essie Jains bio describes her music as gentle, warm, open and intimate. And thats exactly whats found on her debut album, We Made This Ourselves. Her soft, almost operatic voice, backed by subtle piano, makes for a stirring debut full of sad, haunting melodies. Glory opens the album with a soft acoustic riff mixed with subtle electric guitar leads that back Jains melancholy vocals. Haze builds emotional intensity with the powerful refrain, I am right behind you. Disgrace has a waltz feel while Give has a building piano part with some quiet strings behind it. No Mistake closes the album the way it started with quiet guitar, this time mixed in with some piano. Jains music is touching, but it can grow tired at times.

by Essie Jain

The Lookout
Movie
Young actor Joseph GordonLevitt is quickly becoming the king of the neo-noir genre. But while he shows promise, he hasnt had the chance to spread his wings because of taking roles in movies like The Lookout, his latest and blandest. The movie follows Kansas City high school hockey star Chris Pratt (Gordon-Levitt), whose life is changed forever when he gets into a car accident. Now, he has minor trouble with motor functions, a terrible memory, lives with a blind roommate, Lewis (Jeff Daniels, the pictures savior) and works as a janitor at a local bank. Things are pretty monotonous for Chris until one night at a bar when he meets Gary (Matthew Goode). Gary lures Chris into friendship, only to tell him that he and his clan are planning on robbing a bank and need Chris special position to make things go over smoothly. But as the day

A lack of variety in dynamics and mood makes the album boring after a few listens. Jain is onto something. but its just not there yet.

B.B. King at Ameristar Casino concert


Showman, great guitarist, old school B.B. King. The King of the Blues stopped by the Star Pavilion at the Ameristar Casino in Kansas City, Mo., to play a show on March 31. Never have I seen a musician with such control over an audience. If he wanted us to clap after a solo, we would. If he wanted us to sing along or repeat after him, we would. If he had told us to get up and start doing the chicken dance, we would have. He had the audience in a trance. From a wonderful, guitarheavy cover of U2s When Love Comes to Town to closer The Thrill Is Gone, King was captivating. Between songs he told stories about when he was younger, expressed his belief that there was no such thing as an ugly woman and talked about what life was like at 81. He may be old and unable to stand up for an extended period of time he played the entire concert sitting down

Chris Brower

but the dancing he did in his chair would rival most carseat dancing any of us college students have ever done. Some other highlights were How Blue Can You Get, The Letter and Key to the Highway, a song that has been covered by many other musicians, including Eric Clapton. The show lasted about an hour and a half, and every second was great. Brian Clausen

of the robbery draws closer, Chris begins to have second thoughts and realizes that he has the power to make the operation a smashing success or a total disaster. The Lookout isnt a complete failure, but it barely succeeds. Whats sad is that the film constantly displays potential, but then drifts toward mediocrity. Screenwriter and first-time director Scott Frank had a great plot with some good characters, but apparently didnt know where to go from there. The end result is a thriller with adequate

suspense and drama, but one that lacks emotion. Add on top of that a handful of characters and scenes that are totally inconsequential and the film falls even flatter on its face. The biggest redeeming quality of the movie is the light and funny dialogue delivered by Daniels. But unfortunately, comedic relief does not a good crime drama make, forcing the film to fall back on the thrills that it just cant muster.

Jared Duncan

All rAtings Are out of A possible five stArs.

18 JAYPLAY 04.05.2007

A pArT of me

SpeAK
(below) Evers and Moreng pet Morengs dog. (left) Though she hated wearing her brace at slumber parties, Laura Evers attended her friend Kate Morengs slumber party when she was 10 years old.

The brace I wore to correct scoliosis was uncomfortable and embarrassing, but it led me to be more compassionate.
As I walk through the grocery store, I act like I dont notice their whispers. People stare as I pass them. They dont realize the pain caused by their glances. Children stop and ask their parents, whats wrong with that girl? I was in third grade and had recently moved to a new school; I desperately wanted to fit in. Wearing a back brace that stretched from below my chin to the bottom of my hips didnt exactly help in that department. A few months before, my mother noticed that my shoulders were uneven. She immediately made a doctors appointment, at which I was diagnosed with scoliosis, an sshaped curvature of the spine that affects only three out of every 1,000 children. If left untreated, my condition could have interfered with my lung function or worse. Surgery was an alternative to the back brace, but it would have involved inserting a metal rod into my back, decreasing my mobility and limiting my range always worn at night, no of motion. intense physical activities, etc.), Soon after my diagnosis, I I couldnt stop thinking about was sent to a professional brace how the kids would react maker for a three-hour fitting. the next day when I wore my Watching him brace to school. create the brace As soon as I got made me dread home, I began wearing it more; it to rummage was obvious that it through my closet wasnt going to be in an attempt to comfortable. find clothes that The brace would cover up consisted of three the brace. I knew metal bars that that if people saw extended from the metal device my neck to my around my neck, by Laura evers waist, preventing they would never that part of my look at me the body from moving. The bars same way again. I didnt want to were connected to a plastic, face the stares. I didnt want this corset-like apparatus that was change. tightened with straps around The next morning, I cried my waist to straighten my as I got ready for school. The lower curvature. A plastic piece previous nights sleep had left was placed at my right side to the skin on my torso raw with straighten the upper curve. irritation. My skin was not used As I received detailed to the brace. Neither was I. instructions on how to wear The first day I wore the brace to the brace (18 hours a day, school, I hoped people would overlook it. But before class, my friends bombarded me with questions. Why are you wearing that? Does it hurt? Will you have to wear it forever? They were curious, and who could blame them? I answered each question as best as I could, making sure to hide how much the brace bothered me. I couldnt wait until 12:30 when I would be able to take off the brace during lunch break. Since I couldnt take it off by myself, my best friend, Kate, met me in the nurses office to undo the straps and harnesses that kept the brace tight around my torso. I was able to leave the brace in the nurses office for the remainder of the day, knowing that in a few hours I would have to put it on again. During the years I wore my brace, I felt like things couldnt get worse. I was sick of going to slumber parties in my brace. I was sick of missing out on fun activities and, most of all, I was sick of asking, Why me? I used to beg my mom to let me have the surgery. If I could just have the rod in my back, I wouldnt have to wear the brace. I didnt care if I couldnt move my back, at least I could be normal. It will be worth it in the end, she would tell me. There wasnt a doubt in my mind that she was right. I knew that if I stuck it out, my back would be corrected and I could be normal eventually, but the four years of wearing the brace in public seemed like an eternity. Although I never fully accepted the brace, it became a part of me. After a while, my friends stopped noticing it, and I finally began to feel more confident. Its been six years since my doctor told me I no longer had to wear the brace. As I listened to his words, I felt liberated. It was as if I had spent my childhood behind bars and was finally released. I never wanted

pHoToS courTESy of LAurA EvErS

to see the brace again. Do you want to keep it, my doctor asked. His words were laughable and I quickly told him no. The brace was donated to an organization that reused its various parts. Ive blocked out the majority of painful memories of my years in the brace. I dont want to think about the stares or the muffled whispers I endured as I walked through grocery stores and shopping malls. Even though these images have been lost in my memory, I will never forget the feelings they left inside. I know what its like to feel different and, in one way in particular, wearing a brace has helped shape the person I am today. I feel more compassion for others who are sad or feel left out. I feel the need to be the one to help them through their pain and be a source of acceptance. If that was what came out of such a negative experience, then it was worth it in the end.

04.05.2007 JAYPLAY 19