The

little Princes Tooth Castle

Jing Lan

In an old country, Wonderland, there is a beautiful

castle-tooth castle and there lives a happy little prince.

His dad------the old king is brave and handsome, loved

by all his people. The little prince knows his father will
always be there for him and protect the castle.

One day, the old king gets very sick. He asks the little
prince to come to his bed, and tells the little prince that it is
time for him to take the responsibility of being a king.

I can't dad! I do not know how to be a king. I am afraid! I

cant protect the tooth castle! What should I do if one day the
monster Tooth Decay appears?

It is okay, my son. Do not be afraid. If you can find the

Real Sword and the Fearless Warrior, they can help you
defeat any monster and protect our castle.

The little prince departs from his fathers bedside to

begin his adventure of finding the Real Sword and Fearless
Warrior.

When the little prince gets into the town, he hears the citizens

The little prince becomes so sad and began to cry because

he doesnt know how to avoid things like that happen.

Suddenly an old man appears. He asks the little prince.

My child, why are you crying? How can I help you?
"Who are you?"
"I'm Grandpa Dentist, I can help you realize
your dream" I want to have a sword,
Grandpa Dentist.
My child, why do you want a sword?
"Because if I have a sword, I can protect my tooth castle to
avoid the attack from soda and candies.

What do you think the real sword looks like?

I dont know.

The little prince says.

You actually already have it. Its your toothbrush,

that is the sword you keep finding.

But I never see it become a sword. Little Prince
replies.
You need to use it with a magic liquid.
Whats that?
The toothpaste. Oh remember! Never drink it!

After saying goodbye to Grandpa Dentist, a group of

children block the little princes way. The little prince is
really sacred because they are all taller and stronger than
him.
Who are you guys? He asks.
We are your loyal warriors, our prince. They reply.

Whats your name? Little prince asks.

You can call us dentist, my prince. The tallest boy
says.
Hum. What you guys can do for me?
I can regularly check the condition of the Tooth
Castle. The tallest boy answers so.
I can fix the bad part of the castle. The blonde
hair boy says.
I can fight against the monster. The boy who has
the blue eye says.

The little prince is so happy now. Because he finally finds

the Real Sword and Fearless Warriors.

He is so confident that he believes he can protect the

Tooth Castle with the help of the Real Sword and Fearless
Warrior.

 Lan 17

Jing Lan
Writing 2
Professor Wilson
6/3/2016
WP3 Revise
I found a very interesting fact about science museum when I went there with my sister last
year. In every section of the science museum, there are two boards on the wall, which are on
different height introducing this section. An adult can see the higher one horizontally, and a kid
can see the lower one horizontally. Take the Magic Optics as an example; they all talk about
how to use two mirrors to make an object invisible. The higher board uses a lot of texts to tell
people the knowledge of physics and optics. Howeverthe lower board, which is for children,
uses cartoon instead of texts to explain the phenomenon. Inspired by this experience, I would
like to translate a popular science article for adults, called The Tooth Decay Process: How to
Reverse It and Avoid a Cavity, into a childrens book. In order to keep its goal of protecting
childrens tooth, by changing the audience from parents to kids, the genre will be completely

 Lan 18

different., because the audience will determine the writing style, vocabularies, and the tones, and
these three aspects will determine the genre of a text.
Audience can determine the writing style. Compare to the parents as audience, children have
two remarkable features: low education status and lack of concentration and patience. The
audience should be able to help address the problem.(Carroll49) If I want my audience to help
me achieve my goal, but I have to be more willing to finish reading my paper. Thats why I
changed this popular science article into an adventure of a little prince. The adventure is a
complete and dramatic story and full of pictures, so that it can attract children to read on. Besides,
when I read the original article, I tried to read as a writer, the goal is to carefully consider the
choices the author made and the techniques that he or she used, and then decide whether I want
to make those same choices or use those same techniques in my own writing (73 Bunn).
Therefore, I decided to keep all his scientific researches to back me up, and I will get rid of all
scientific education. For example, in the article, the author explains to the parents why they
should

watch

their

children

brushing

the

teeth.

If

children

regularly

consume

higher-than-recommended amounts of fluoride during the teeth-forming years (age 8 and

 Lan 19

younger), their permanent teeth may develop white lines or flecks called dental fluorosis. On
the other hand, in childrens book, children have no patience with a long sentence and hoping for
a more straightforward expression. So, I changed it to Oh, remember! Never drink it! I also
reduced the use of primary sources and made lots of changes to the scientific explanations. For
example, for the sentence in the original article A cavity is permanent damage that a dentist has
to repair with a filling. I changed it to Tooth castle is broken. It is much simpler.
After we have an outline of the texts, audience can determine the vocabularies. In order to
show its academic, a popular science article usually uses a lot of terminologies. However,
children do not understand complex vocabularies. Therefore, after I deleted plenty of texts, I
started to replace the complex vocabularies with simple words. For example, the article has a
sentence said the repeated cycles of acid attacks cause the enamel to continue to lose minerals.
I replaced enamel with tooth, and I replaced acid with soda, then the sentence becomes
soda and sugar will attack our tooth castle. I used simple words to express the same idea, so
that it is easier for children to understand.
Audience can determine the type of language used, the formality of the discourse, the

 Lan 20

medium or delivery of the rhetoric, and even the types of reason used to make the rhetors
argument (Carroll, 50). By doing this genre translation, I learned that before we translate genre,
the most important thing is to get to know the change of the audience. In this way, it will be
easier for the readers to accept our articles and we will be more likely to achieve our goal.

 Lan 21

Work Cited
Dirk, Kerry. Navigating Genres. Writing Spaces: Reading on Writing Volume 1(2010):

249-262. Print. 3Mar. 2014

Space Tourism by Virgin Galactic. Advertisement. NY Times, n.d. Web. 3Mar. 2014
Bunn, Mike How to Read Like a Writer. Writing Spaces: Reading on Writing 2(2011):

71-86 Print. 3Mar 2014

Carroll, Laura Bolin. "Backpacks v. Briefcases." 45-58.

(http://wac.colostate.edu/books/writingspaces1/carroll--backpacks-vs-briefcases.pdf)
National Institute of Dental and Craniofacial Research. The Tooth Decay Process: How to
Reverse It and Avoid a Cavity Web. Mar 2013
http://www.nidcr.nih.gov/oralhealth/OralHealthInformation/ChildrensOralHealth/ToothD
ecayProcess.htm