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Brett Turner
Mary Martin
English 110
7 September 2015
Living with Stress
I find myself sitting at my computer staring anxiously at a blank monitor,
pondering over how to even loosely put my experiences into words. My first memories
of this anxiety began in my early years of Kindergarten. I have faint but never fond
memories of a constant need of reassurance. I always had a fear of never being perfect
and disappointing the people around me. I remember being given instructions so
simplistic, like putting three dots of glue on a single piece of paper, and still having to
walk up to my teacher to make sure I had done exactly as she had expected. I had to do
this constantly everyday, time and time again, to the point where it even worried my
teacher. This is a stress in my life that has continued to plague me throughout my life,
even to this day as I am writing this essay.
This stressed followed me like my own shadow into the first grade where I had
developed a fear of change. I remember vividly the day they decided to have a teacher
switch day. It blew my mind so much that it caused a wave of anxiety that drowned me
to the point where all I could do was erupt with frustration. This caused stress in my
mom, which in turn stressed me out even more.
Because of this, my mom and father took me to a therapist who made me feel so
comfortable that I didn't mind the sessions. They seemed more like a playdate than

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therapy. During therapy, my parents and I discovered that my emotions were like a
volcano constantly on the verge of erupting.(picture) I continue to work on being
dormant, allowing myself to be able to go through the natural progression of emotions.
I have, however, had certain breakthroughs in stress throughout my life. For
instance, my third grade teacher, somehow broke into my shell and miraculously got me
to raise my hand and answer questions. Questions that I probably knew the answer to
all along. Somehow this teacher was able to put me at an ease that I had not felt before.
This was a small but significant step in my future confidence. This is a teacher who
touched my life in a way I will never forget. However this was not the case with all my
teachers, some were completely the opposite and detrimental to my progression.
If there is a single factor that spells out the difference between the cafeteria
fringe headed for greatness and those doomed for low self-worth, even more than a
caring teacher or a group of friends, it is supportive, accepting parents who not only love
their children unconditionally, but also don't make them feel as if their idiosyncrasies
qualify as "conditions" in the first place.
Alexandra Robbins, The Geeks Shall Inherit the Earth: Popularity, Quirk
Theory and Why Outsiders Thrive After High School
Some teachers methods where self-deprecating and self-demining when their
teaching styles put me in constant recognizable comparisons with my peers. It was very
easy for classmates to recognize who the teacher was referring to, putting me and my
classmates on constant defense, almost like it was a survival of the fittest type of
scenario, increasing my stress levels every day I had the class. This is when I reached
the age that I found it okay to exclaim my concerns to my parents when I felt threatened

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in my educational environment. My parents backed me but even with the help it didn't
ease my stress to the point of tranquility as intended.
. After that school year, one of the worst things possible happened. My parents
got divorced. This sent my world spiraling out of control and it felt like I had nothing to
grab onto to stop me and keep me stable. My teachers didn't fully understand my
predicament either, which in turn raised my stress levels and sent me into a sort of
depression at an early age that I still have to this day not fully recovered from. It stayed
in the background of my life into the next year, constantly nagging at me as if I was the
one that did something wrong, just adding to my anxiety.
I then proceeded into my seventh grade year with yet another anxiety testing
teacher. This time I was forced to present my work in front of the class. Yet again this
caused a constant fear and agitation each day leading up to the hour this class
occurred. I had a persistent underlying fear everyday knowing there was that chance
that I would be called to stand before my peers and be judged with my knowledge like I
was on trial for murder.
American teenagers are now the most stressed-out age group in the U.S., according to
APA's 2013 Stress In America survey.
Now begins my dreaded high school years. My freshman year was by far the
best of the year., I made new friends. I excelled in school, and even had a girlfriend for a
short time. I didn't have a care in the world. I looked forward to the rest of the years but
things rapidly changed. People start to discriminate. They care how you look, they
spread rumors, and so called friends make fun of you behind your back. This is trouble
and stressful for a normal person but for a kid dealing with anxiety and an already

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damaged self-confidence it was Hell. I know that high school is just one more phase of
my life and another hurdle that life is throwing at me and I still need to overcome it. I
know what I want to achieve for myself and I have worked my hardest for everything
that I have achieved.
Alexandra Robbins states in her book that Polarization is just one of many ways
group membership can change an individual. Perhaps the most striking effect of group
membership is that it can modify individuals perceptions of themselves. Unable to
separate their personal introspection from the ways they believe other people perceive
them, teenagers may have what psychologists call an imaginary audience, meaning
they believe that other people are just as attuned to their appearance and behavior as
they are (cue any pimple cream commercial). These perceptions can affect various
aspects of their lives. For example, psychologists found that when Asian girls were
subtly reminded about their Asian identity, they performed better on math tests. When
they were subtly reminded about their gender, however, they performed worse.
To this day, when I have another hurdle thrown at me, it has been proven to me
that when I turn to my parents, even now that they are divorced, they still come together
as a family. Together we continue on my journey of success, and I know with them
supporting me I can reach these goals. It's true you can't pick your family,but you can
always stand by them.
As I embark on my senior year, I am more than ready to move on from high
school. I look forward to my future. Since freshman year, I have known what I have
always wanted to do. I aspire to graduate from high school and go to college for
engineering.

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Works Cited
Robbins, Alexandra. The Geeks Shall Inherit the Earth: Popularity, Quirk Theory, and Why
Outsiders Thrive after High School. New York: Hyperion, 2011. Print.

Gregoire, Carolyn. "American Teens Are Even More Stressed Than

Adults."Huffingtonpost.com. N.p., n.d. Web.

Archuletta, John. The Good Abortion. N.p., n.d. Web.

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