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Those Names Never Go Away

It isnt until the first time you get called ugly that you know what its like to feel wrong in
your own body. It isnt until the second time you get called ugly that you start to believe what
other people are saying about you. It isnt until the third time, and every time after, you get called
ugly that you hide, trying to create a disguise for the parts of you that people believe are wrong.
I was in preschool the first time I got called a name. As a three year-old, not much
happened; I cried and my mom made the other kid apologize. I was so young I dont even
remember what happened, but not long ago my mom told me that ever since that day, she was
always worried that it wouldnt stop. It didnt. It was in third grade, at circle time; I was wearing
my absolute favorite outfit: bright green top with rhinestones on the neckline, and a sort of
green-brown plaid skirt. Of course, that meanie had to point out my Middle Eastern legs dark
hair and lots of it. It took until the seventh grade for me to wear anything that exposed my arms
and legs. I got used to wearing a sweater and jeans in one-hundred-degree weather.
Going ahead to sixth grade, my Middle Eastern eyebrows- dark, large, and connecting in
the middle ever so slightly- were apparently so unnatural that two eighth grade boys decided to
yell at me from across the hallway. They did this to get my attention so I would turn around and
they could see my face. Laughter followed, and I can still hear their heinous chuckles in my
head.
Fast forward to the beginning of high school. By now, I was so bruised on the inside from
all the names I got called and the bullying never seemed to end. I refused to tell myself I looked
acceptable or up to peoples standards. Even in sophomore year, I was the victim of
unwarranted bullying. Sometimes, I wonder if it will ever go away, or if Ill ever be able to look
in the mirror and truly like what I see.
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Bullying has been a part of my life for so long. It has changed me, made me an insecure
teenager looking for the approval of others on a daily basis to determine if I am good enough.
However, I am not alone. Over 3.2 million students are victims of bullying each year (Cohn
and Canter). This number on its own proves that bullying is a problem and not something to be
overlooked. Its an issue that leads children in the wrong direction- not loving themselves and
constantly being abused, leading them to a breaking point. Unfortunately, for some people like
me, even though the actual bullying has stopped, its effects do not disappear. Because of this, I
wanted to research the actual effects bullying has on students and how it follows them into
adulthood.
The best definition for bullying is hard to find- usually its just a list of the various ways
bullying occurs. In order to give a more exact look on what bullying is and how it happens
without giving a bulleted list, Police Officer Rana Sampson outlines it clearly.
Bullying has two key components: repeated harmful acts and an imbalance of
power. It involves repeated physical, verbal, or psychological attacks or
intimidation directed against a victim who cannot properly defend him- or herself
because of size or strength, or because the victim is outnumbered or less
psychologically resilient. (Sampson 2)
She clearly writes what bullying includes and who is usually targeted. She states that
bullying can be anything including physical assault, intimidation, name-calling, threats for
money, property or work destruction, and theft (Sampson 2). Another example of the specifics of
the various ways bullying occurs comes from the book Bullying in American Schools. The author
defines bullying as physical violence such as hitting and kicking, as well as mental or emotional
violence-rumors, manipulation, or exclusion of other people. It is also stated that the most
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common types of bullying are threats and taunts which can be more damaging to children and
teenagers (Garrett 5). Bullying is so broad that giving it a set definition is difficult. The effects it
has arent any simpler.
Everything I had learned about bullying was what I had read in the books, online, or
heard about in documentaries and videos. The information I got from research was usually the
same. Donald Scully, a Summer Camp Director of the Walnut Creek Summer Camps gave me
the biggest difference in terms of views on bullying. I visited him at the Walnut Creek
Community Center located by the Heather Farms Park-a familiar place for me. I had worked for
Scully over the summer as a Recreation Leader for the Day Camp. This made it a lot easier for
me to settle. I walked into his little, one desk office, he described as the new Camp Office and
took a seat. Hung around the room were silly photos of campers and staff along with many
papers getting ready for the coming summer. I began asking my questions after only a few
minutes of friendly chit-chat,
After hearing countless explanations of what bullying is, Scully gave a new definition,
one that I had never heard before and was so simple. I wondered why and how nowhere else
explained it so simply. I feel like bullying [is when] a person is just uncomfortable with the
situation and is out of their own control. Its very broad- from cyberbullying, to teasing, all the
way to physical bullying. The idea behind it was so exact and easy to understand: it is when
someone is not in control of their own uncomfortable situation.
Not only was Scully able to help me get a new perspective on the definition of bullying,
he also showed me how cyberbullying extends into traditional bullying. With my background
knowledge, I had believed that cyberbullying was taking over the usual in-person bullying.
Scully disagreed. He explained, I think cyberbullying has led to an increase in traditional
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bullying. People are anonymouswith texting and messaging...if you see that person the next
day at school it doesnt end. It continues like Hey did you see that image of [that person]? He
finished his answer by stating that he believes cyberbullying has made traditional bullying worse.
In fact, 25% of people who are cyberbullied are involved in a face-to- face confrontation or
argument after and 8% of people get into a physical fight (Statistics on Bullying). This was a
new perspective for me, but it made a lot of sense. When students read or see something on the
internet, theyre more likely than not, going to tell people about it at school the next day,
increasing the amount of traditional bullying.
Cyberbullying can be described as willful and repeated harm, inflicted through
computers, cell phones, and other electronic devices (Hinduja and Patchin 12). This type of
bullying has become more popular, as the amount of social media has increased and the
technology has advanced, making it easier to be anonymous and post anything online. 24% of
students between the ages of 12 and 18 have reported being cyberbullied (Hinduja and Patchin).
Due to the large amount of technology that students are in possession of, the ability to cyberbully
becomes increasingly easier. Approximately 4.4% of cyberbullying comes from text messages,
3.6% from the internet, 2.7% from instant messaging, 1.9% from e-mails, and 1.5% from gaming
(Robers 44). Cyberbullyings effects on students does not range much differently than traditional
bullying. However, with the easy use of cell-phones and other technology, tormenting online
becomes much easier to repeat. Any type of bullying that is repeated, whether twice or one
hundred times, becomes extremely harmful to the victim.
For students, bullying leads to a decrease in academic performance. They are focused on
how to stay away from the next time they will be tormented or humiliated rather than what is
going on in class. Their ability to pay attention to their classwork diminishes. Any student who
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feels they are uncomfortable or threatened at school are more likely to stay home. According to
statistics reported by ABC News, nearly 30 percent of students are either bullies or victims of
bullying, and 160,000 kids stay home from school every day because of fear of bullying
(Bullying and Suicide). As class attendance decreases, the education a student receives
decreases. Therefore, the student is not learning and falling behind. Because a student does not
fit into the bullys standard of normalcy, he or she is being robbed of their own education.
Bullying deprives children of their rightful entitlement to go to school in a safe, just and caring
environment; bullying interferes with childrens learning concentration and the desire to go to
school (Garrett 59). Some students may feel trapped within the schoolyard, especially if the
bully is in the same class or someone they see in the hallways. The sense of danger in schools
decreases a students ability to learn; but that is only one on the extensive list of effects bullying
has on a student.
The list of effects of bullying seems endless. The health and psychological effects vary
from student to student, depending on the severity of the bullying and the way the student is able
to handle the situation. The most common health issues students will encounter due to bullying
are: high levels of anxiety and stress, constant illness, headaches or migraines, exhaustion or
constant fatigue, high irritability and anger, hypersensitivity, and low self-esteem (Garrett 68).
These health issues become more severe as the bullying gets worse and is repeated. This adds to
the decrease in school performance and attendance. A study was done about the physical health
detriments on students. Not only is the student exposed to illness, but they also experience lower
physical health. Researchers collected data on 4,297 students enrolled in grades five to ten.
Those who were subjected to constant, persistent bullying said they had more
problems with everyday physical tasks like walking, running or playing sports.
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Thirty percent of those who had been bullied in the past and currently had low
physical health scores, compared to twenty-four percent only being bullied during
the present... Only six percent of those who hadnt been bullied had low marks in
this category. (Castillo)
Physical health is important to growing children and teenagers but bullying is getting in
the way. A victim may experience the effects of bullying different than another. This is due to the
severity of the harm and pain inflicted on the victim. In order to understand why these issues are
developed, researchers and scientists look closer into the body to see what changes in victims
compared to non-victims.
Researchers have developed a theory as to why victims of bullying have these health
issues. It is due to the CRP, or C- reactive protein. This protein is produced by the liver and
increases when there is an inflammation present in the persons body (Elevated C-Reactive).
High levels of CRP is a generic response that indicates that the body is either fighting an
infectious agent, reacting to an injury or responding to a chronic condition (Arseneault). It was
found that victims of bullying have a higher level of these proteins. By knowing this, researchers
are able to determine approximately how much a person has been exposed to bullying. One
popular experiment called the Great Smoky Mountains Study was conducted by William E.
Copeland at Duke University Medical Center. He tested the levels of CRP in 1,420 students in
the United States and found that the effects of bullying are immediate. Students who were
exposed to bullying multiple times, or with constant repetition, had CRP levels that were doubled
compared to those who were not bullied as often or at all. No change [before and after the test]
was seen in bullies, or in kids who hadnt been involved with bullying one way or the other, the
researchers reported online in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences (Norton).
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The results of these CRP tests describes how bullying can affect a victim immediately. A person
exposed to bullying will have a decrease in their health because their C- reactive proteins are
telling their body theyre trying to fight off an illness. These protein levels increase very quickly,
but usually last into adulthood, along with the psychological effects.
The emotional, mental, or psychological effects of bullying are usually much more
detrimental to a student- especially in adolescents- and can last a life time. Whether it comes
from traditional bullying or cyberbullying, students will experience ranging severity of substance
abuse, trust issues, loneliness, depression, anxiety, trauma, and low self-esteem (Kennedy). An
unfortunate amount of students will turn to suicide as the answer to their problems.
It is uncommon for children and teenagers to speak about their issues; they are more
likely to keep to themselves rather than ask for help. A survey published in the British Medical
Journal was conducted of 3,700 families. Out of this number, 1,199 teenagers admitted to being
victims of bullying. The childs parents were asked if their son or daughter has been bullied and
only 229 said their child was a frequent victim (Pappas). Children dont report their problems or
seek help, instead they suffer in silence. It becomes a burden they carry and leaves them in pain.
There is another kind of violence, and there is violence by talking. It can leave you hurting
more than a cut with a knife. It can leave you bruised inside (U.S. Secret Service). This was
quoted from a single middle schooler. Her feelings do not vary much from the thousands of other
victims of bullying. Students who experience bullying tend to become more emotionally
withdrawn. They may become extremely shy, self-contained, have anxiety and trust issues, and
feel lonely to the point that interacting with their peers becomes a difficulty. Regular exposure
to hurt, humiliation, and social isolation may cause them to sink deeper into a world of their

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own (Steele). Children and teenagers exposed to such feelings can lead to more serious issues
that last a lifetime such as low self-esteem, depression and suicide.
It may seem as though the health and mental issues will diminish after a while; but they
instead can lead to deeper psychological trauma. This trauma can last into the early or even late
years of adulthood- depending on the severity of the past bullying. Studies have found a higher
level of depression and lower self-esteem among formerly bullied individuals at age twentythree (Garrett 69). Depression is not easily overcome and it can take months or multiple years to
get back to a normal state of mind. It can stem from loneliness, low self-confidence, and any
other reasons a person has for feeling as though they are not happy. After being constantly
harmed, the students ability to believe they are desirable, needed, or loved, becomes extremely
difficult (Steele). With extreme cases of depression and other psychological problems, victims
find what they believe is the answer to their problems to be suicide. Not all victims of bullying
will turn to suicidal thoughts, but an alarming number do. Each year, one out 13 kids under the
age of 19 attempts suicide, a rate that has tripled over the last 20 yearsMore than 2,000 of
them succeededWere not even realizing the fact that suicide is bullys quiet little secret. Its
picking off our children one at a time (Garrett 62). Compared to non-victims, those who have
been bullied are two to nine times more likely to turn to suicidal thoughts and attempts (Bullying
and Suicide). Bullying directly links to suicide, despite the fact that other issues factor into these
actions as well. No matter the issue, trauma from bullying grows inside the person and takes
over, leading them to desperation where their only escape is believed to be to no longer live.
Victims of bullying do not forget what happened to them, it lasts their whole life, even if the
bullying stops or they build their self-confidence back. It sticks inside of them; and for some, it
slowly eats them away.
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Research and statistics make understanding the issue of bullying simpler and more real.
But one of the best ways to realize the effects it has on someone is to speak to a victim directly. I
was able to speak to Wes Allnutt, who was willing to talk about his experience and outlook on
the issue. Allnutt is a Program Coordinator for Walnut Creek Recreation and was able to give me
a more personal touch to my research. He began explaining how he was effected in his
childhood. I know as a child I was teased a lot. That [lowered my] self-esteem. Whats wrong
with me? Why dont they like me? Thats the biggest issue. [Kids] are cruel when they tease,
they go for your weakness. Unfortunately, this came to no surprise- a child feeling worthless
and confused. I asked Allnutt if he believed that verbal bullying was less or more effective to
hurt someone than physical bullying. He replied by saying, in his experience and by the way he
felt, they had the same degree of effect. This was followed by him explaining that there was no
cyberbullying when he was a kid and if someone was to get bullied it would be on campus. After
asking how large of a problem bullying is in high school he went on to say, high school has
more serious consequences because of trying to fit in with your peer groups, learning your
identity, getting to know your personality- it cuts deeper as you get older. Allnutt didnt say
much more about how it followed him into adulthood other than as people mature, they create
thicker skin, and it is up to them what events they hold on to. By hearing a victims explanation
on the view of bullying, I was able to put all my research into real life perspective other than my
own experiences. Learning from a book allows room for information and facts, but learning from
a real person deems the issues more real and more personal.
Throughout my research, I was able to put statistics to the previous knowledge I had. The
hardest part was realizing that Im one out of hundreds of thousands of students who deal with
bullying. I was able to learn about the different outlooks on bullying and how its changed over
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time. Unfortunately, what I learned about myself, the people around me, and even the whole
world, is that I cant help every single individual who goes through bullying. It is something a
very large amount of people experience, and thats life- and thats the way its always going to
be. However, there are ways we can help decrease it and build a safer and friendlier community.
The best way to get a better understanding of an issue and its severity is by bringing awareness to
it. Schools can implement anti-bullying campaigns such as Stomp Out Bullying. Posters,
clubs, and assemblies also bring awareness to the problem. Stricter rules and consequences for
bullies will help decrease the amount that happens on campus. But this can only happen if
someone speaks up or if there is a closer watch on the students actions. Bullying cannot be
stopped completely- but even helping one person can lead to a world of difference.
Bullying is not a joke or an issue to throw over your shoulder. It is something that should
be treated as seriously as all the other problems children and teenagers encounter. Children are
driven to the grave because of the cruel words and actions of others. It is up to society to follow
the Golden Rule: Treat others the way you want to be treated. Until then, students will continue
to suffer in silence and grow up thinking they arent good enough. No matter the health issues,
the mental effects, the physiological explanations, or the types bullying, it is something that
seems to never end. As Wes Allnutt said: Do something to help the world rather than take it
down.
Works Cited

Books:
Garrett, Anne G. "What Is Bullying?" Bullying in American Schools: Causes, Preventions,
Interventions. Jefferson, NC: McFarland, 2003. 5+. Print.

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Hinduja, Sameer, and Justin W. Patchin. "Bullying: Past, Present, and Future." Bullying beyond the
Schoolyard: Preventing and Responding to Cyberbullying. Thousand Oaks, CA: Corwin, 2009.
12. Print.
Robers, Simone. ": Bullying at School and Cyber-Bullying Anywhere." Indicators of School Crime
and Safety: 2012 (2013): 44. Institute of Education Sciences. Bureau of Justice Statistics. Print.
13 Mar. 2016.
Sampson, Rana. "Bullying in Schools." Problem-Oriented Guides for Police (2009): 2. The U.S.
Department of Justice, 2009. Print. 13 Mar. 2016.

Electronic Sources:
Arseneault, Louise. "Health Impact of Childhood Bullying Can Last a Lifetime." Scientific American.
N.p., 4 May 2014. Web. 11 Mar. 2016.
"Bullying and Suicide." Bullying Statistics. N.p., 07 July 2015. Web. 14 Mar. 2016.
Cohn, Andrea, and Andrea Canter. "NASP Center Bullying: Facts for Schools and Parents." NASP
Center. National Association of School Psychologists, 7 Oct. 2003. Web. 13 Mar. 2016.
"Elevated C-reactive Protein (CRP)." Health Centers. Dr. Andrew Weil, n.d. Web. 10 Mar. 2016.
Kennedy, Linda. "Effects of Bullying: Implications into Adulthood." Overcome Bullying. N.p., n.d.
Web. 11 Mar. 2016.
Norton, Elizabeth. "Why Bullying Victims Develop Health Problems as They Age and Bullies
Flourish." Washington Post. The Washington Post, 19 May 2014. Web. 10 Mar. 2016.
Pappas, By Stephanie. "Teen Bullying Doubles Adult Risk of Depression." LiveScience. TechMedia
Network, 02 June 2015. Web. 15 Mar. 2016.

Sameer, Hinduja, and Patchin Justin. "Cyberbullying Facts - Cyberbullying Research

Center." Cyberbullying Research Center. N.p., n.d. Web. 13 Mar. 2016.
Statistics on Bullying." ADLs A WORLD OF DIFFERENCE Institute. Anti-Defamation League, n.d.
Web. 13 Mar. 2016.
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Steele, Ann. "The Psychological Effects of Bullying on Kids & Teens." Masters in Psychology Guide.
N.p., n.d. Web. 14 Mar. 2016.
U.S. Secret Service National Threat Assessment Center. (October 2000). Safe School Initiative: An
Interim Report on the Prevention of Targeted Violence in Schools. Washington, D.C.

Primary Sources:
Allnutt, Wes. Program Coordinator, Walnut Creek Recreation Center, Walnut Creek CA. Personal
Interview. 3 March 2016
Scully, Donald. Summer Camp Director, Walnut Creek Recreation Center, Walnut Creek CA. Personal
Interview. 3 March 2016.

Works Consulted
Electronic Sources:
"The BULLY Project." The BULLY Project. N.p., n.d. Web. 18 Mar. 2016.
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"Bullying." 2016 American Psychological Association, n.d. Web. 18 Mar. 2016.
"National Bullying Prevention Awareness Month." Stomp Out Bullying. N.p., n.d. Web. 14 Apr.
2016.
"Understanding Bullying." Psychology Today. Sussex Publishers, n.d. Web. 10 Mar. 2016.
"What Is Bullying." StopBullying. U.S. Department of Health & Human Services, n.d. Web. 14
Apr. 2016.

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