ITS GENERATIONAL I

Distant, disconnected, obsessed: The onslaught of social media might make our teens generation seem worse
than any other before it. But a quick trip back in time reminds us that every generation had its own obsession.
To understand where theyre coming from, we only have to see where we used to be.

20 PARENTING TEENS

Conversation is said to be a lost art. Good talk presupposes leisure, both for preparation and enjoyment. The age of
leisure is dead, and the art of conversation is dying. Frank Leslies Popular Monthly, 1890

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BY RYAN MASON

t is easy to romanticize past generations as the good ol' days while declaring the present as dysfunctional.
This has as much to do with our idealized memory as it does with reality. I remember drinking from the end
of a cut off garden hose. (I still dont know why every garden hose we owned had the end cut off.) My friends
all rode bicycles without helmets and rode in cars without seat belts.
It was a simpler time. All was right in the world. Or was it?
Every generation has been introduced to technology that simultaneously became both a blessing and a
curse. Blog writers everywhere are opining about people losing the ability to have a personal conversation
due to technology. That may or may not be true, but it is certainly not a new lament:

FEBRUARY 2016 21

22 PARENTING TEENS

IT IS NOT ENOUGH TO SIMPLY THINK OF

TECHNOLOGY AS EITHER GOOD OR BAD.
RECEIVE, REJECT, OR REDEEM

It is not enough to simply think of technology as either good or bad.

More than two billion people are plugged into social media and
that number is growing each year. Parents have an unprecedented
opportunity to teach their children how to responsibly engage with
others through the use of social media.
One pastor I know suggested a three-fold approach to navigating
cultural trends like social media. Parents can receive social media as good
and let their kids have full access to the technology. They can reject it
as corrupt and evil while avoiding social media altogether. Or they can
redeem social media and learn to interact with others in ways that are
consistent with a Christian lifestyle.
The entire world is at our fingertipsliterally! Social media offers an
almost limitless platform by which to share lifes beautiful moments,
encourage others, and proclaim the sufficiency of Jesus Christ. However,
as with all powerful tools, caution must be exercised.

With the advent of cheap newspapers and superior means of locomotion...

the dreamy quiet old days are over... for men now live, think, and work at
express speed. They have their Mercury or Post laid on their breakfast table
in the early morning, and if they are too hurried to snatch from it the news
during that meal, they carry it off, to be sulkily read as they travel... leaving
them no time to talk with the friend who may share the compartment with
them... the hurry and bustle of modern life... lacks the quiet and repose
of the period when our forefathers, the days work done, took their ease...
William Smith, from Morley: Ancient and Modern (1886)

ITS RELATIVE

BRING THEM UP

Age has a stealth-like quality in that it overtakes you before you realize it. I
find myself discussing with friends how fast my children are growing up, a
sure sign that I am advancing in years. My previous Cool Dad Status has
been replaced with comments like, Dad, do not even try to be cool, or
Dad, you need an elevator to reach my level. What does that even mean?
The most telling indicator that I have lost my youthful designation
is my complete ignorance of popular music. I now tune in to the various
music award shows only to mutter comments of disdain and long for the
real music of my generation.
Thats how it goes with every generation. Technology changes, but we
remain consumed by it. I remember repeating, I want my MTV as a new
music television channel burst onto the scene.
A quick look at the previous decades serves as a reminder of those
things that captivated our attention:
1960s: Color television becomes available
1970s: Rubiks Cube, Hacky Sacks, and the Sony Walkman
1980s: MTV, video games, and early personal computers
1990s: Cell phones, Internet, and email
2000s: Texting, instant messaging, on-demand media, and
widespread social media

Parents of every generation must decide how to best train their children
so that they become responsible citizens and champions for Christ. The
admonition is the same, whether were learning to navigate the modern
invention called the newspaper, or apps like Snapchat and Facebook.
Parents who decide to let their children learn on their own are
guilty of negligence. Albert Barnes wrote, If a man does not teach
his children truth, others will teach them error. Moses also taught
parents to lead by example:
These words that I am giving you today are to be in your heart. Repeat
them to your children. Talk about them when you sit in your house and
when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.
Deuteronomy 6:6-7
The implication is that parents are to be the primary faith trainers of
the home. Children learn by watching and listening to their parents
as life goes along. That means they are watching when mom goes on
an all-night, Netflix binge of Gilmore Girls. It also means that they are
forming conclusions when dad is more interested in his phone than
having a conversation.
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PEOPLE HAVE
ALWAYS BEEN
DRAWN TO THE
TECHNOLOGICAL
ADVANCES OF
THEIR DAY. THE
TEMPTATION TO
ALLOW THE LATEST
INVENTION TO
CONSUME US IS
NOTHING NEW.

People have always been drawn to the technological advances of

their day. The temptation to allow the latest invention to consume
us is nothing new. This is obvious for our current generation with the
availability and affordability of electronic gadgets.
Social media gets the blame for everything from relationship troubles
to the end of the human race: Families that are focused on their phones
in restaurants are now the subject of comedy routines and grandparents
commentary. Couples sit across from each other, more interested in
checking their Instagram or Facebook. One popular commercial shows
a young woman breaking up with her boyfriend by sending him a text
across the table.
Have we really become that disconnected from each other, and is
social media to blame?
The people of 1886 were having the same conversation, but they
attributed it to different technology: the newspaper and the railroad.

Fathers, dont stir up anger in your children, but

bring them up in the training and instruction of
the Lord. Ephesians 6:4
How did your parents handle the big issues
of your childhood? Did they set a positive
example and walk alongside you as you
discerned how to make sense of the world?
The good news is that you have the
opportunity to raise your children in the way
of the Lord no matter what you experienced
as a child. Here are some tips to consider as
you help your teen learn how to responsibly
usetechnology:
Set a positive example. Avoid the Do
as I say, not as I do parenting method.
Open up the communication lines
with your teen. Ask open-ended
questions to learn your teens motivation
for interacting with social media.
Invest in your teens life and become
interested in the things that matter
to them.
Know your teens friends and
theirparents.
Attend church together.
Speak often about the opportunity
to glorify God with social media and
provide real-time examples.
Unplug from technology for a day and
go on an outdoor adventure together.

RYAN MASON serves as Pastor of Adult

Ministries at First Colleyville near Dallas, Texas.
He loves to write about real life issues and help
others apply biblical truths to daily living. He is
married to Kilie and they are blessed with two
amazing children. You can connect with Ryan
on Twitter @ryankmason.
FEBRUARY 2016 23