Attracting and Dating Younger Women

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Attracting and Dating Younger Women

(/users/chase-amante)
by Chase Amante (/users/chase-amante)

Tuesday, 30 July 2013
In Part I (/content/dating-younger-women-does-it-make-you-dirty) of this series on

dating younger women, we addressed some of the bigger questions on the
subject: do younger women actually like older men; are older men who date
younger women 'dirty'; are younger women dating older men all gold diggers?
Some of the conclusions we came to include these:

Age is nature's proving grounds for male mate quality: a younger male is
selected on the merits of his promise and potential; an older male,
meanwhile, is selected on the degree of his proven, achieved success
There's a huge difference between exceptional older men, and ordinary
older men - the former being most or all of fit, healthy, confident,
charismatic, high status, and financially well-off; the latter being none or
few of these
A woman's mating preferences are: top - proven (exceptional) older man;
middle - unproven but promising younger man; bottom - unproven and
unpromising younger man (creepy guy (/content/how-not-be-creepy-guy) )
and ordinary (unexceptional) older man (dirty old man)
Because most older men fall into the "ordinary older men" paradigm
(ordinary is the norm, after all), most older men are not especially
attractive to younger women, thus the 'dirty old man' wrap that some
people are quick to label older men interested in younger women with
Most real-life older man / younger woman couples are actually two
http://www.girlschase.com/content/attractinganddatingyoungerwomen
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decent, normal, attractive people happy and comfortable with each other
and reasonably proud of each other - not many are the rich guy / gold
digger couples modern popular media seems so eager to paint them as
While the previous article was about answering the higher level questions what's with the pushback in the West against older men dating younger
women? Do women find older men attractive or not? Why would a woman
choose an older man when she could have a younger one? - in this article, we
focus on the how-to.
How to date younger women, that is.
So, grab your walking canes, gentlemen, and let's talk about the mechanics of
meeting, dating, sleeping with, and having relationships with younger women
when you're an older man (and a little bit about this if you're a younger man,
too).
Oh, and if you haven't read it yet, do check out Part I here, as well: "Dating
Younger Women: Does It Make You 'Dirty'? (/content/dating-younger-womendoes-it-make-you-dirty) "
Onwards, then.
"OMG, he's sooo sexy."

"Ew, gross... he could be my father."
The first comment is one I've heard made repeatedly about Sean Connery by
teenage girls. Not 1960s James Bond Sean Connery, mind you, but present day
in-his-80s Sean Connery.
The second comment is one I've heard several times by teenage girls about
amorous men in their 40s or 50s.
What's the difference?
Well, Connery's a celebrity, of course. But this isn't the only path to sexyolder-man-dom - in the last article, I related the tale of a 59-year-old Navy
Captain who did just fine with young, pretty, vibrant 20-somethings. And I've
known my fair share of men in their 40s and 50s who regularly picked up and
slept with and dated women in their 20s - some of them have even been
students of mine I've watched firsthand pick up girls in nightclubs
(/content/how-pick-girls-bars-and-clubs) and meet women on streets; some are
guys who post on the discussion boards (http://www.girlschase.com/boards) right
here on the site today.
I've had girlfriends of mine - beautiful, educated, charismatic girlfriends in
their 20s - tell me they'd take a seasoned, attractive older man over me. I had
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one remark - while watching a recent Harrison Ford movie, where the senior
was at one point in mortal danger - that she wanted to jump into the movie,
save Harrison Ford... then leave me there and bring him back out with her
instead.
I watched a gorgeous 28-year-old ex-girlfriend of mine with a killer body and
a great career date her boss, a bald, portly Frenchman in his 50s who'd been
divorced three times.
I listened as another girlfriend, 26 at the time and with a strong career in
finance, told me about the man in his 40s she'd doggedly chased down for a
relationship until he'd turned her down, telling her she was too young for him.
Clearly, at least SOME younger women like older men.
But what do you have to do and who do you have to be to make that be YOU?
The Older Man Template

When most people think about older men dating younger women, I think they
mostly either picture a suave, well-to-do man in a suit jacket with a social
climbing young girlfriend, or some creepy, predatory older man with money
to throw around dating an obnoxious gold digger.
While these templates are no doubt based on paradigms that do occur in the
world, I haven't met people who much fit these descriptions myself, and
they're pretty poor stereotypes for older man / younger woman pairings in
general.
In the real world, the kinds of older men women find attractive are every
bit as diverse as the kinds of younger men they do.
Here are the types of older men I've seen various attractive younger women
fall for:
The spunky, vivacious guy bursting with energy and enthusiasm (that
Navy Captain I told you about)
Smooth, charming, sexy, and playfully flirtatious (Sean Connery fits this
bill, as do some of the older men I've known who did well with women)
Manly, brooding, and darkly humorous (Harrison Ford goes here - this
one's harder to get initial attraction with sometimes, but once a girl gets
to know a guy like this she becomes nuts about him; George Clooney's
somewhere in the middle between this one and the smooth, charming,
sexy, flirty guy)
Naturally, different types of women go for these different types of men:
The spunky guy gets more submissive women
The smooth guy gets smooth women, or sometimes brooding women
The manly, brooding guy gets spunkier women
I'm certain there are other "templates" out there I haven't seen - had I not
known my old Navy Captain, for instance, I wouldn't have thought that
"spunky" worked for an older guy (or even that there WERE spunky older
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guys, for that matter).

The point is though, there is not a one-size-fits-all version of the sexy older
man you must be.
Instead, you have some options, no matter what your base personality may
be.
What the Science Says

Let's get into a bit more research.
From "Winners, Losers, and Choosers: A Field Investigation of Dating
Initiation (http://psp.sagepub.com/content/10/4/502.short) ", published in the
Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin in 1984 about video-dating (a preInternet dating service):
Twostudiesoninterpersonalattractionwereconductedata
commercialvideodatingservice.Profilesofmemberswereratedon
age,physicalattractiveness,status,humorandwarmth.Inthefirst
study,significantdifferenceswerefoundbetweenpopularand
unpopularmales,physicallyattractivemalesbeingmorepopular.
Popularfemaleswerefoundtobeyoungerandmoreattractivethan
unpopularfemales.Thesecondstudyinvestigatedthedatingchoices
andrejectionsoftwentynewmembers.Higherstatusandphysical
attractivenessweresignificantpredictorsofmalesbeingchosenby
females,whereastheonlysignificantpredictoroffemalesbeingchosen
bymaleswasphysicalattractiveness.Malestendedtochooseandreject
youngerwomen.andfemalestendedtochooseandrejectoldermen.
Therewasalsoatendencyforbothsexestochoosetargetsofhigher
socialdesirabilityandrejecttargetsoflowersocialdesirability.We
concludedthatthemaleolder,femaleyoungernormand
physicalattractivenessareimportantfactorsindating
initiationstrategiesforbothsexes,althoughfemalesalsorely
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onstatus.
Here it's found that women select for (at least in video dating):
Looks
Status
Older men (though how much older is unspecified)
Nothing earth-shatteringly new there.
From "Partner preferences across the life span: Online dating by older adults
(http://psycnet.apa.org/journals/pag/24/2/513/) ", in the June 2009 edition of
Psychology and Aging:
Stereotypesofolderadultsaswithdrawnorasexualfailtorecognize
thatromanticrelationshipsinlaterlifeareincreasinglycommon.The
authorsanalyzed600Internetpersonaladsfrom4agegroups:2034,
4054,6074,and75+years.Predictionsfromevolutionarytheory
heldtrueinlaterlife,whenreproductionisnolongeraconcern.Across
thelifespan,mensoughtphysicalattractivenessandofferedstatus
relatedinformationmorethanwomenwomenweremore
selectivethanmenandsoughtstatusmorethanmen.With
age,mendesiredwomenincreasinglyyoungerthan
themselves,whereaswomendesiredoldermenuntilages75
andover,whentheysoughtmenyoungerthanthemselves.
So here the conclusions relevant to us are:
Men offer status information more than women
Women seek men with status more than men do
Men seek increasingly younger women as they age
Women desire older men (though again, no age specificity here)
Although I can tell you from skimming online dating profiles (what the study
authors did here), while I've seen women with more limited preferred age
spans, I've also seen plenty of women with 25- to 30-year age spans for men
they're looking for (say, 25 to 50 or so) - it's not that uncommon to come
across.
A more interesting finding from the July 2001 edition of Evolution and Human
Behavior is "Age preferences for mates as related to gender, own age, and
involvement level
(http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1090513801000654) ", with the
following findings:
Thepresentstudyexamineddesiredminimumandmaximumages
formatesacrossfivedifferentlevelsofrelationshipinvolvement
(marriage,seriousrelationship,fallinginlove,casualsex,andsexual
fantasies)comparingindividualsof20,30,40,50,and60yearsold.
Consistentwithpreviousfindings,womenpreferredpartnersof
theirownage,regardlessoftheirownageandregardlessof
thelevelofrelationshipinvolvement.Men,ontheotherhand,
regardlessoftheirownage,desiredmatesforshortterm
matingandforsexualfantasieswhowereintheir
reproductiveyears.However,withregardtolongterm
mates,menpreferredmateswho,althoughyoungerthan
them,weresometimesabovetheageofmaximumfertility.
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Explanationsforthesefindingsarediscussed.
According to this research:
Women desire partners their own age
Men desire short-term partners of reproductive age
Men desire long-term partners their own age
The bullet about women preferring partners their own age contrasts with the
earlier research, and with what I've seen myself - this survey largely seems to
be self-reported, so that might be down to the difference between what
women say they want vs. actual real-world preferences (something we'll talk
about in just a bit when we talk about women being reputation conscious and
worried about what people might think).
The more interesting notes here are older men's preferences for flings with
and fantasies about reproductive-aged women, but for commitment they
select women their own age. My guess would be a fling with an older woman
doesn't provide much reproductive value (i.e., she's likely to be infertile), but
when you want a companion around for the long haul, you probably want
someone you're able to relate with and connect to as much as possible - and
that's probably someone with a similar level of life experience to you.
Now here's the most interesting chunk of research of all: from a 1985 edition
of The Journal of Social Psychology comes "Ratings of Physical Attractiveness
as a Function of Age
(http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/00224545.1985.9922868#.UfaMXT7880M) ":
HolmesandHatch(1938)theorizedthatphysicalattractivenessis
relatedtoeroticdesirabilityandtobiologicalsuperioritywiththe
resultthatthroughselectivebreeding,thespecies,Homosapiens,is
improved.Elaboratingthistheory,Symons(1979)suggestedthatover
thelifespanofasingleindividual,thecorrelationbetweenphysical
attractiveness,eroticdesirability,andbiologicalsuperioritywould
ensurethattheindividualwouldhavechildrenonlyduringperiodsof
superiorfitness.Healsosuggestedthatphysicalattractivenessismore
importanttomalesinselectingsexpartnersthanitistofemales.To
testthetheorizingofHolmes,Hatch,andSymons,itwas
hypothesizedthatfollowingpubertyanegativerelationship
wouldbefoundbetweenanindividual'sageandratingsof
physicalattractivenessbyjudgesoftheoppositesex.
Furthermore,therelationshipwouldbemorenegativeforratingsof
womenbymenthanforratingsofmenbywomen.Thenegative
relationshipwasfoundforratingsofwomenmadeby
Americanmen(n=40)butnotratingsofmenmadeby
Americanwomen(n=40).
So, the researchers went in hypothesizing that age leads to a decline in one's
physical attractiveness as one advances in years, and that this decline would
be steeper for women than for men.
What the researchers found was that, while the decline in physical
attractiveness for women as rated by men existed, men's physical
attractiveness ratings as judged by women did not go down at all as they aged.
Now isn't that interesting.
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When I had a long-running debate before with a friend of mine about older
men's desirability to younger women, the crux of his argument was, "Women
want young hot men, because older men are ancient and ugly."
Apparently though, women themselves beg to differ.
Silverback Theory
In the previous article, I
mentioned how the only men
I really see as tough
competition
(/content/trouncing-malecompetition-girls-dating-scene)
anymore when I encounter

them vying for a woman's
affections are attractive, puttogether, exceptional older
men. When I'm up against
these men, I lose.
I look un-suave by
comparison.
Doesn't matter how smooth (/content/how-be-smooth-women-and-take-more-lovers) ,
slow, or mature I am. A suave older man still has me beat. I don't know if it's
life experience, or more years in seduction, or simply the magnetic appeal of a
stand-out older man, but I don't like having to compete against a guy like this,
and when I roll with a guy like this, it's one of the very few times the lead
female of any pairs or groups we meet goes for someone else (him) instead of
for me.
Women are attracted to the guy in charge. And when you put a 30-year-old
guy next to a 50-year-old guy, it isn't the 30-year-old guy who strikes you as
the one in charge.
I think of this as being rather similar to how things function mating-wise for
gorillas.
You see a band of gorillas, and it's a family group of females and children, led
by one dominant male: a silverback.
The silverback is a mature, older male. He's big, he's strong, and he's sharp he knows how to maintain control of his group and keep it his.
If you didn't know better, you might think a younger gorilla would be able to
take his band away from him - the younger gorilla is more energetic, he's
hungrier, he's youthful.
You'd think he'd be able to take on a silverback and win.
But he can't. He loses when he tries.
Humans aren't gorillas, of course. A male gorilla has a comparably slower path
toward maturing into dominant silverback material than a male human does
to reaching proper adulthood. The advantage age brings is not quite as
extreme in man.
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But even in humans - from everything I've seen - there doesn't really appear
to be anything more attractive to a woman than a stand-out, exceptional,
attractive, high status older male.
The silverback takes all comers, and wins.
The biggest part of dating younger women, of course, is the same as dating
any kind of women: having your fundamentals tied down tight.
That's things like:
Your fashion (/content/fashion-men-primer-looking-amazing) / hairstyle / facial
hair (/content/facial-hair-styles-make-you-look-cool-sharp-and-sexy) / body
(/content/how-build-male-body-drives-women-crazy)
Your body language (/content/sexy-body-language-men-learned-hot-girls) /

nonverbal communication (/content/nonverbal-communication) / facial
expressions (/content/7-facial-expressions-drive-women-wild)
Your sexy vibe (/content/constructing-your-sexy-vibe-and-making-girls-go-nuts) /
sexual tension (/content/sexual-tension-7-ways-make-women-excited-and-randy) /
general sexiness (/content/how-be-sexy-man)
Your conversational ability (/content/conversationalist) / deep diving
(/content/secrets-getting-girls-art-deep-dive) /
emotional connecting
(/content/how-build-emotional-connection)
Your ability to lead women (/content/real-reason-many-men-cant-get-girl) /

take the reins / handle logistics (/content/sex-logistics-how-get-intimateunusual-places)
... basically, everything we talked about in "How to Attract Women: The Guide
(/content/how-attract-women-guide) ."
Those are all the things we teach you to do all over this site, in the programs
(/program-catalog) here, and on the discussion boards
(http://www.girlschase.com/boards/) .
If you've been reading this site, you've got 95% of it already.

However, there are a few other considerations to keep in mind.
Pressure on Younger Women to Conform

One of the key things standing in the older man's way, when it comes to
dating younger women? Status, reputation, and social pressure
(/content/social-pressure-surprisingly-important-getting-girls) .
Women - especially young women, frequently enmeshed with large, fluid
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groups of opinionated friends - are extremely status conscious, and retain

reputation management (/content/killer-reputation-management-your-social-circle) as
perhaps their foremost social priority.
Make a girl potentially look bad, and you will be thrown under the bus
(/content/granting-social-status-and-not-getting-thrown-under-bus) faster than you can
say, "What just happened?"
... EVEN if she liked you and found you attractive.
Because there is a lot of public sentiment in the West regarding older men
interested in younger women as 'dirty' right now, and younger women
interested in older men as 'gold diggers', even though most younger women
don't actually hold these views, they will fear their friends will when being
approached by an older man around their social circles.
What ends up happening much of the time when a girl is approached by an
older man while with her social circle (/content/meeting-women-social-circle-prosand-cons) in
the West is this:
Older man approaches younger woman in front of her friends

Younger woman panics internally; thinks, "Oh no; what if my friends think
I'm a gold digger, or into dirty old men?!"
Younger woman rejects older man to ensure she maintains her social
status; gossips to her friends: "Can you believe that? He's old enough to be
my father!"
This reinforces to the group that older men are 'dirty' and need to be
rejected by any of the group's members on said older men's approaches
The larger and more cohesive the girl group, the stronger this effect is.
But much of it is group-based; the effect goes away rather fast when a group
disbands or a girl stops associating with a tight-knit group of judgmental (or
imagined to be judgmental) friends.
That is to say, if you meet an 18-year-old in high school with her group of 7
besties, even if you're attractive and she might otherwise like you, you're
walking into a bear trap as an older man and will easily be eviscerated.
Conversely, if you meet an 18-year-old in college when she's just recently
arrived and doesn't know anyone yet and there are no suspected social
repercussions for her actions (she is anonymous), and you're attractive and
she likes you, there's a good probability things go quite well.
Therefore, if you're an older man who likes younger women, avoid
approaching large, cohesive groups whenever and wherever possible.
If you're a younger man, your odds are a bit better... but you are STILL a lot
more likely to get thrown under the bus by a girl in a tight group than a girl
you approach who is alone or with a sole friend.
The rule of thumb for older and younger men alike, then, but especially older
men, is this: approach girls by themselves or with but one friend as your
preferred choices.
The girl with 2+ friends in-tow is less and less likely to be receptive, because
she's too worried about her reputation and too uninterested in however
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attractive you actually would be to her in another situation.

Of course, if you see a girl you really like, and won't have a chance to meet her
in more favorable conditions, give it a shot anyway. The worst she can do is
laugh you off... but she'd do that to anybody in that situation.
Approaching Younger Women

Goes without saying, but same as any other advice on this site - don't bother
making excuses for yourself, qualifying yourself, or anything - it just makes it
weird.
That means, don't try to explain why you're approaching her, as if she's
going to think, "Isn't this guy too old to be talking to me?!" Just act like it's the
most normal thing in the world, and she's a lot more likely to follow your lead.
Eventually, you'll get comfortable enough with approaching younger women
that it WILL be the most normal thing in the world.
Sprezzatura (/content/sprezzatura-effort-and-investing) becomes ever more

important as you age - a young man chasing a woman around is bad; an older
man chasing a woman around is worse. Obey the Law of Least Effort
(/content/law-least-effort) . It's crucial to coming across as a stand-out older man
rather than an ordinary or washed up one.
Is there a specific type of opener to use with younger women?
No, not really.
As usually, situationally relevant openers (/content/when-use-direct-openersversus-situational-openers) will
get you into more interactions, more smoothly,
and provide an easy entry into indirect game (/content/how-use-indirect-gameget-girls) ,
while direct openers (/content/when-use-direct-openers-versus-situational-
openers) are
more polarizing, and will lead to strong disapproval from some
women and strong instant attraction from others.

Worth noting here: women will use the, "Aren't you too old for me?" or,
"Aren't I a little young for you?" excuse to reject you when you are older than
them and they are younger than you and they are not interested. Don't take
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this at face value, any more than you would a woman telling you that she has
a boyfriend or isn't really dating right now or what have you. It's just an
excuse. Women will pick the first excuse at hand to reject you (/content/howact-when-girl-rejects-you) with
when they aren't interested... but the real reason
for the rejection is that they simply aren't interested. They almost never
actually know why they aren't, though.
I've several times seen younger women reject a man with an, "I'm a little too
young for you, don't you think?" excuse, only for them to later end up with a
man older than the one they rejected (usually one more charming than the
first).
Don't take it to heart when you get the "you're too old for me" rejection; it just
means you were doing general attraction things wrong, not that you've
crossed some age threshold whereby you are no longer attractive to any
women of her age bracket anymore.
Differences Between Older Guy and Younger

Guy Game
Depending on your age, you'll treat younger women a little bit differently.
Generally speaking, younger Western women like being teased
(/content/teasing-girl-right-way) . They respond well to it. They enjoy having a man
gently nudge them in the ribs and delicately pop their egos.
Teasing properly is an easy way of showing a younger woman you aren't
putting her on a pedestal (/content/women-pedestals) . The great masses of
younger and older alike men are guilty of this; and usually, both younger and
older men need to tease somewhat to differentiate themselves from the kissups and supplicaters (/content/non-supplication-why-working-impress-women-doesntwork) .
Regardless of your age, it's important to keep this teasing light and not too
personal. You don't want to send her into auto-rejection (/content/secretsgetting-girls-staying-out-auto-rejection) ;
you just want to tease her enough that she
says, "Oh, good... he can be normal around me and isn't going to be tip-toeing
around because he thinks I'm young, hot, and amazing."
Also regardless of your age, you will show interest in her potential, asking her
things about what she does with her time, what she'd like to do, why she does
the things she does and not the things she would rather be doing, etc. everything we talked about in those conversation articles (if you need more,
see "Conversation Example (/content/conversation-example) " and "What Does She
Want? The 8 Things You Must Ask Her (/content/what-does-she-want-8-thingsyou-must-ask-her) ").
However, when you're younger and talking about yourself, you'll want to
allude a bit more to qualities that paint you as wild, rebellious, adventurous,
and ambitious - travel, sports, martial arts, getting arrested, starting a
business, etc.
When you're older, you want to allude more to things that imply you've
"made it." Not showboating, mind you; not even explicitly stating what is so
great about you. But just implying via your communication that you are
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comfortable living the life of someone who's long since achieved success, and
that is what you're accustomed to.
Here's an example:
Her: ... and if I'm really lucky, someday I'd like to start my own dance
school.
You: That's fantastic. Dance is a beautiful form of art.
Her: How about you?
You: Oh, me? Well I actually helped a friend set up her dance school,
get it running and off the ground... that was a long time ago though.
Her: No, I mean, what do you do?
You: Ah. Well, I travel, admire art, and try to sample every reasonably
good restaurant in whatever city I'm spending a fair chunk of time in.
I'm a bit of a foodie... sometimes I have to hit the gym pretty hard
after a big meal to not end up with a beer belly. Your body doesn't
bounce back as fast when you're my age as it does when you're
younger, you know.
Her: Oh. Well, what I meant was what do you do for work?
You: I have a small company that does software implementations.
Nothing terribly huge, but it's enough for me to have my freedom.
Her: That's so cool; I really want to have my own business.
You: What's stopping you?
Her: Well I...
You can't play the mysterious/traveling unemployed adventurer card as an
older man; once you're past 33 or 34 or so, I think you've pretty much got to
be a business owner (best), retired (second best, or maybe tied for best), or
reasonably high up in whatever you do for work.
You also must be very wary of being the older "adventure" traveler; a woman
is excited to meet a young man traveling the world for the sake of adventure,
but when she meets an older man who's traveling, he must have a purpose for
being there.
Which brings us to a core difference between younger and older men:
younger men are expected to be in search of a purpose (/content/purpose-lifepractical-point-view) ;
older men are expected to have one.
Everything about you, as an older man, must communicate purpose, certainty,

and self-assuredness. You must know not just the what of the things you do,
but the why.
You're not in Eastern Europe because you're a sex tourist. You're there
because you're opening up a new branch of your bank from back home in
Switzerland.
You're not in South America because you love Latinas. You're there because
you're researching for the Great American Novel you're writing, and your
main character is an immigrant from Brazil.
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You're not in East Asia because you've heard Asian women adore Western
men. You're there because a Korean company brought you in to spearhead
their marketing advertisements and Britons have a reputation for well-run
advertising campaigns.
This doesn't just extend to travel, either; it extends to everything. You can
get away with anything you want as an older man - even those things most
older men can't - if you have a good reason.
You're in a nightclub? Surely you must be chasing after young women another dirty old man. Unless it's because you're there to entertain a business
client who happens to love nightclubs... or it's your buddy's bachelor party
(for his second wedding)... or you're old friends with the manager of the club
and you wanted to pay him a visit. Or maybe you just spent a great deal of
time in nightclubs as a youth and you still like to come by and have a drink
now and again for old time's sake.
You're approaching women on the street during day game (/content/using-daygame-get-girls-14-myths-debunked) ?
Well, you were on your way to the office, and
you just couldn't help it: she's beautiful; you had to meet her.
You quickly see how important it is as an older man to have a social life that's
structured around your professional endeavors, or other core callings in life.
Having reasons for things is a "nice to have" as a younger man meeting
younger women, but it's a must have for older men meeting them. One of
the big differences between a dirty old man and a suave older gentleman is
that the dirty old man is just chasing around after pretty young girls like he's
22 years old. The suave older gentleman is only there because his mission has
taken him there - and while there, he's just happened to notice this beautiful
girl.
Notes on Dating Younger Women as a

Younger Man
Some of the younger readers on this site have asked about how to do better
with younger women as a younger man, since many younger women seem to
go for men at least a few years older than them.
Others have remarked that they don't even like younger women, and find
them annoying or trite, preferring women older than themselves.
In fact, depending on how old you are, even as a man you'll frequently tend to
prefer women older than yourself, at least until your early twenties or so:
Thetendencyforwomentopreferolderpartners,andformento
preferyoungerpartners,hasfrequentlybeenexplainedintermsof
socializationtoAmericansexrolenormsspecifyingthatmenmustbe
olderandmorepowerfulthantheirfemalepartners.However,recent
crossculturaldatarevealthissamepatterninallsocietiesstudied,a
findingmoreinlinewithanevolutionarylifehistorymodel.The
evolutionarymodelassumesthatwhatisattractivetomales
isnotyouth,perse,butfeaturesrelatedtofertility.This
perspectiveleadstoahypothesisconcerningthedevelopmentofage
preferencesamongadolescents:teenagemalesshouldviolatethe
13/44
12/16/2014
normativepatternshowninadultmalesandexpressinterest
infemalesolderthanthemselves.209teenagers(103males,106
females)ranginginagefrom12to19weresurveyedregardingtheage
limitstheywouldfindacceptableinadatingpartner,aswellastheage
ofadatingpartnertheywouldfindideallyattractive.Although
teenagemaleswerewillingtodategirlsslightlyyoungerthan
themselves,theyindicatedamuchwiderrangeof
acceptabilityabovetheirownages,andalsoreportedthat
theirideallyattractivepartnerswouldbeseveralyearsolder
thanthemselves.Preferencesofteenagefemalesweresimilar
inpatterntothoseofadultfemales,ranging,onaverage,
fromtheirownagetoseveralyearsolder.Whencombinedwith
theconsistentadultdataobtainedfromnumerouscultures,thesedata
suggesttheutilityofviewingthedevelopmentofsexdifferencesinmate
preferencefromtheperspectiveofanevolutionarylifehistorymodel.
That's from "Adolescents' Age Preferences for Dating Partners: Support for an
Evolutionary Model of Life-History Strategies
(http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.14678624.1996.tb01810.x/abstract;jsessionid=05981BE685E991ED5C9ABD8FA03E64CD.d04t03?
deniedAccessCustomisedMessage=&userIsAuthenticated=false) ",
a 2008 article in the
journal Child Development.

Both younger men and younger women prefer older partners, according to
the study.
Personally, I did better with women in their mid-20s and up until I was about
26 or 27... it wasn't until then that I started consistently sleeping with women
in their late teens and early 20s. We simply didn't have much to talk about,
and weren't really what one another was looking for.
If you're a younger guy interacting with younger girls, be aware that younger
women can seem jarring and hard-to-get because they don't have the
smoother, better-calibrated social responses that more experienced older
women have... instead, younger women are rough around the edges. They will
be:
Seemingly rude sometimes when they're just trying to tease or flirt with
you
Looking aloof and disinterested because they're very focused on saving
face
Complaining and objecting, even about things they may want to do
Trying to treat you like you're being weird even when you're not
This is partly why some guys do better with younger women as they get more
experienced with women - when you don't know where the lines are
because you're not socially experienced enough yet, it's hard to know if her
reaction is correct or off/fake.
Once you know though, it's easy to give a girl the skeptical look
(/content/skeptical-look) until she drops the act and goes along with you.
Think of it like this: younger women are all talk and little walk (and often don't
know what they want), while older women don't talk as much but are a lot
firmer and more straightforward in what they want and communicate (or
don't).
14/44
12/16/2014
With younger women, keep the conversation to a minimum, keep things

moving, and do not brag. Bragging is bad with older women; it communicates
a guy is insecure and needs to build his status up. But it does something much
worse with younger women: it makes you unrelatable.
Most of the things men brag about, younger women cannot relate to, because
they haven't had those life experiences yet.
All you do with bragging around younger women is alienate them and blow
yourself out.
Relationships with Younger Women

Here's one I don't have quite as much information on, but I'll relate some
anecdotal data.
When I see older men take younger long-term girlfriends and brides, the
cutoff age seems to be about 27 as the minimum. I noticed it when I was
pretty young; all these rich older men would always be marrying 27-year-old
women.
"What's wrong with a 20-year-old?" I used to think as a teen. "If I was some
rich old guy, that's who *I* would marry! 27 is so old!"
I think the reason for this is, again, relatability (/content/tactics-tuesdays-learnhow-be-relatable-these-7-secrets-relatability) ;
a woman who's a long-term
relationship partner of yours is someone who's going to be very close with

you, someone you're going to spend a lot of time with, someone who will
influence you quite a bit, and someone you'll talk with more than almost
anyone else.
And the fact of the matter is, if you're an exceptional older guy who's trying to
do things with his life, a 20-year-old kid just isn't going to have a lot of
perspective yet to be able to contribute a whole lot to your mission.
I'm positive this is why older men might like sleeping with much younger
women, but will usually select as their more permanent mates women who
aren't quite the youngest they could get.
It's because, as much fun as that 18-year-old with her tight body was... she
just doesn't have much to say when you want to tell her about how things are
going with your business, and that complicated merger you just pulled off,
and whoa, look what your competitor is doing, isn't that crazy.
Unless you want to be her second father in the relationship (and I doubt you
do), you'll almost certainly end up dating a woman in her mid- to late-20s or
up when you're already somewhere in your 30s, 40s, 50s, or beyond.
It's an Older Man's Game, Too

One final piece of research to strip you of any last remaining reservations you
might've had about dating younger women as an older man. This one's from
Research on Aging, and it's entitled "The Nature and Functions of Dating in
Later Life (http://roa.sagepub.com/content/13/2/244.short) ." Here's the abstract:
15/44
12/16/2014
UsingtheNationalSurveyofFamiliesandHouseholds,logistic
regressionanalyseswere
conductedtoidentifyfactorsthat
aresignificantpredictorsof
datingforpersonsaged60
yearsandolder.Stepwise
regressionswerealsoconducted
todeterminetheeffectsofdating
onthepsychologicalwellbeing
ofolderdaters.Thestrongest
predictorofthepropensity
todateinlaterlifeis
gender,withmen
significantlymorelikelyto
engageindating.Anumber
ofgenderdifferenceswerenoted
astheyrelatetothelikelihoodof
dating.Inparticular,ageand
socialroleinvolvementtend
toinfluenceoldermen's
likelihoodofdating,whilehealthandmobilityweresignificantly
associatedwithdatingamongolderwomen.
Older men (60+, in this study) are significantly more likely than older women
to be dating.
Of course, if older men were dating older women, those numbers would have
to be equal... but they aren't.
They're dating younger women.
A good chunk of them, anyway.
Biggest influencers on older men's dating were age (realistically-speaking, a
60-year-old is probably more likely to be dating than an 80-year-old) and
social role - another way of saying social status (/content/granting-social-statusand-not-getting-thrown-under-bus) .
That is, if you want to know which older men are most likely to be dating, just
look at whether they're ordinary men with mid-level social status... or
exceptional men with exceptional status.
Younger women are there and available to you as an older man, if you want
them, and if you're willing to work on yourself hard enough to become what
they want.
So get out there and show those whippersnappers how it's done.
Chase Amante
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Comments
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younger-women#comment-11962)
Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, 30 July 2013
17/44
12/16/2014
Awesome article Chase.

I've searched round the forums a number of times but I cant for the life
of me seem to find a particular thread! In it somebody asks you whether
you want to have kids someday. Could you send me a link or even better
tell me your views here?
You've mentioned that youre not really doing monogamy presently; do
you think you will again at some point or do you consider it mostly
pointless now? In fact do you consider monogamy, not necessarily
lifetime, but monogamy nonetheless, worth it for anyone?
If you are, or were monogamous, do you ever specifically tell
girls/answer if they ask you, that youre going to be faithful or do you
leave it mysterious. Or is it different for particular situations, and if so
what do you do for which?
Thanks
Personal Preferences on Children /

Monogamy (/content/attracting-anddating-younger-women#comment-12011)
Posted by Chase Amante (/users/chase-amante)
on Wednesday, 31 July 2013
AnonAs far as my personal views, I think children are more or less a

necessary part of a life well-lived. I think you also sort of owe it to
your predecessors; there's been an unbroken line of descent of
successful reproductions from the first strand of self-replicating
RNA all the way down 3.2 billion years later to you... would kind of
suck to be the one to break the chain, no? (I think it's still possible to
live a good life sans reproduction, but you've really got to contribute
to the species in a non-insignificant way; Nikola Tesla and Isaac
Newton are a couple of great examples)
On me being monogamous to a single woman, I'm not so much a fan,
but when I am in monogamous / semi-monogamous situations, I
prefer to keep a girl guessing... I'll answer questions or accusations
with (overly emphatic) things like, "I would NEVER do that!" with a
smile and a wink (figuratively speaking), or, when girls ask me if I'm
going to hurt them (which I'm commonly asked), I'll answer with, "I'll
try my best." Basically, no promises, though I will sometimes pay lip
service to what she wants to hear while implying with my tone of
voice that I don't really mean it / I am not someone to be completely
trusted.
Women who doggedly pursue strongly exclusive monogamy and
won't take a half answer for an answer I will either break up with, or
temporarily grant full monogamy to if I really like them and don't
have much need to meet more women at the moment. As soon as my
disposition changes, though, so as not to break my word and hurt
them as little as possible, I will inform them I can no longer do
18/44
12/16/2014
monogamy, and part ways.

Chase
Hi Chase! Great post. Your (/content/attracting-and-datingyounger-women#comment-11963)
Hi Chase! Great post. Your site has been VERY helpful not just for
getting better with women but for getting better at everything,no
kidding.
Basically i was always a beta guy who still attracted girls etc, but with
your help it's now much easier and quite frankly much more fun and
relaxed. I used to suffer from social anxiety but ever since i read your
opinions on life and women, that it's better to not wait for things but get
them and be relaxed,dominant and constantly take action, life's much
better. So thanks!
Anyway, i wanted to request:
1) A post about hairstyles
2)A post about mixed signals. I know you've already done this but
another one more detailed and with more examples would be great.
Mixed Signals (/content/attracting-anddating-younger-women#comment-12012)

AnonThrilled to hear it! Amazing how a few tweaks can more or less
change the thrust of your life, ain't it?
Hairstyles - duly noted. It's high up on my list of articles to-do - long
overdue at this point, I realize.
On mixed signals - could you be a bit more specific on what
specifically the other article didn't cover that you'd like to see
covered? Here's that one again if you've forgotten:
Mixed Signals from a Girl: What These Mean (/content/mixed-signalsgirl-what-these-mean)
Chase
Great article chase. Just (/content/attracting-and-datingyounger-women#comment-11964)
Posted by James1 on Tuesday, 30 July 2013
Great article chase. Just want to say that this site has lifted me up quite
a bit from a guy who could get a good amount of decent looking girls to
19/44
12/16/2014
a guy who can get a large amount of exceptional looking women. My

question is whether you think as an older male its harder to stay out of
boyfriend zone. I'm only 30 so not that old, but find that I'm having a
harder time getting back to a woman's place on the first date. (The fact
that I don't have a place of my own in the place I'm dating doesn't help
either). I'll walk a girl home but have a hard time getting past making out
outside her apartment on a first date. It definitely happens, but not with
the frequency I'd like. :). I feel like anytime I try to disqualify myself as a
boyfriend I also add separation that makes a girl think all I want to do is
sleep with her. Anyway any advice is much appreciated.
-James
Older Men and the Boyfriend Zone

(/content/attracting-and-dating-youngerwomen#comment-12013)
JamesIt is more difficult for older men, yes. Much of it's simply because
you're going to be higher value by default, and (presumably) much
closer to an age you'd want to settle down at than a younger man is.
Some things that help can be being divorced (communicates you're
probably not best-suited for long-term commitment), having
children (women go kind of nutty for guys who've successfully
managed to reproduce... it's an easy form of preselection
(/content/how-preselection-can-get-you-girls) ), or from out of the country
and not staying, or a frequent traveler who isn't around much. Being
married or in a relationship already can do the trick too (if you're
already attached, you're not good for much more than a quick fling).
If you don't have any of these going on, it's a good bit harder... you're
basically a single, eligible bachelor with no real reason she shouldn't
boyfriend-zone him.
You might be better off lying and saying you're in a relationship right
now... you can always tell her you're single later, and that that's just a
fib you tell girls so they won't get too attached (she'll love this,
because women lie to men about having boyfriends all the time too).
You can also just be really vague about your relationship status, and
refer to female "friends" of yours you were hanging out with one-onone in offhand remarks here and there, so that she wonders if you're
attached or not. Done right, this can work to keep you out of
boyfriend territory too.
Chase
Help needed... (/content/attracting-and-dating-youngerwomen#comment-11965)
20/44
12/16/2014
I know its off topic but i have a problem that needs solving..
Sorry for being it long though.
I have been dating a girl for a week or so making out in the process,
went out with her sister and her sisters boy and afterwards came back
to my place.
Within the first 5 minutes, i started kissing and tried escalating and got
rejected 4 times, with her asking "Don`t you think its to fast?" with me
replying " the speed is right, or are you smiling for some other reason?"
After the 4th attempt of mine she stood up and decided to leave but not
after 5 or so minutes after we continued making out just a bit more.
She then left and i knew something went sideways.
The next day i called her and i knew she was pissed.. She told me she
usually goes cold on guys like that, who move that fast.
I tried persuading her to calm down and to reconsider, with her stating
she was still a VIRGIN.
Three days later we talked and i tried to make her reconsider me, by
telling her what she means to me, offering high value without pumping
it also telling her that i am not a bad guy ( really i am not a bad guy )
We then decided to leave things cool off for a while and after 4-5 days
later i tried calling her, she did not respond.
2 hours later i receive a text with her saying that it is best for us to stay
as friends, that she does not want to lie to me, that she has been in
contact with her ex for 2 days and does not know what will happen. At
the end of the text she says "we`ll see each other".
Now at the time i tried calming things down, stating that i was
underrated in her eyes and that she used me just to get back to her ex (
implying i am vulnurable ).
2 days later i sent a text to her sister in an attempt to let them know that
i won`t give up on her and that going back to her ex means no good for
her and that i only want whats best for her.
We cooled of a bit and a week later i re-engaged with SMS and later on
via Facebook. She started smiling again and everything was okay, she
even gave me a green light for me to call her.
But here is what bugs me.
She tells me to call her from monday to thursday ( and those days she is
on vacation with her sister and 2 girlfriends ).
Now i was thinking at first "does this mean that if i call her on friday or
saturday that she will be with her ex and it could mean trouble if i call
then?"
Or simply because she might be busy with her family agricultural work
??
I thought what the heck i`ll call and build some rapport.
And so did, i called today and she told me they come back from vacation
21/44
12/16/2014
on Friday morning or afternoon, which is as i expected.

Now at the end of the call i told her i will call her from monday onwards
as i am going on a vacation myself on Thursdray.
She did say OKAY, but what does this mean exactly ?
Is she trying to get back with her ex and simultaniously trying to make
me pay for what i did?
Or did things die down with her ex, so now she chooses me ?
Or is it possible that she uses "getting back to her ex" to try and see my
intents and whether i will let go or keep fighting for her ?
Now usually i won`t go this far, but this girl means a lot to me and i do
want to turn things around.
At this point i am rather desperate, especially for this girl that i want in
my life.
She is 18, a virgin, but that does not mean a lot to me.
Also is it a good idea to tell her something liek this: "The fact that you
are a virgin does not mean much for me, i value you for other reasons (
intelligence, beauty etc ) ??
Is it a good idea telling her that her virginity means nothing to me ??
This site has helped me a lot, and i am forever grateful and thankful, i
just need this help on this situation.
Sorry for the long comment but i need help here and i need it fast ....
Regards.
Re: Help needed... (/content/attractingand-dating-younger-women#comment-12014)

AnonShe rebuffed your advances and shut you down, and sounds as
though she's rotated you into the friend zone (/content/how-get-outfriend-zone-mans-survival-guide) (see
the article on second dates
(/content/3-second-date-strategies-make-her-flirt-and-swoon) -
specifically
the part about failed escalations - to understand why this happened).

The best thing you can do here is have one (1) normal "rebuilding
rapport" phone call and then call or text her to meet... if she says
"no," it's not going anywhere.
Usually when you try escalating to sex and fail, it's done. Maybe 15%
of the time you can eventually sleep with the girl, but only if you
handled things very well and very low effort at the end as she was
leaving. She needs to leave with a good feeling, not one where she
goes cold.
22/44
12/16/2014
Because you're chasing now, and you're calling while she's telling
you she wants to be just friends, I'd recommend having a read
through these articles to get refreshed on the situation:
Keeping Your Cool: Don't Chase Women (/content/keeping-yourcool-dont-chase-women)
Why Chasing Women Doesnt Work and Why Persistence Does

(/content/why-chasing-women-doesn%3Ft-work-and-why-persistence-does)
Can't Stop Thinking About Her? Here's Why You Need to Meet
More Girls (/content/cant-stop-thinking-about-her-heres-why-you-needmeet-more-girls)
Chase
Hmm... (/content/attracting-and-dating-youngerwomen#comment-12027)
Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, 31 July 2013
Yes Chase i read those articles even before i escalated and failed.
The thing is though, she tries to get back with her ex, so what i
was wondering why is she keeping me in play ?
I sent a rather unique text to her sister telling her that she will
make a mistake if she goes back to her ex, and that i do not want
her to lose me.
Could it mean that this text worked, and now she turns her
attention towards me ?
Anyway can you answer this for me.
Is it a good idea to tell her that her virginity means less/nothing
to me, that i value her for other reasons ( naming those reasons )
???
Thanks again, really glad to have this site.
I enjoy reading your work.
Keep it up.
types (/content/attracting-and-dating-younger-women#comment11966)
You mentioned three kinds of older men that get women. A sort of
spunky one, a smooth one, and a brooding one. Can we younger men
use these as well?
Re: types (/content/attracting-and-datingyounger-women#comment-12015)

23/44
12/16/2014
AnonYes, absolutely! Types are ageless... just referring specifically to older

men I've seen make these types work, for the folks reading the
article thinking, "Bah, *I* don't think a guy with X kind of personality
can make this work with younger girls!"
Chase
Questions (/content/attracting-and-dating-youngerwomen#comment-11967)
Hey Chase great article.

Was hoping you could answer a few questions I have.
Is having money the most important factor when it comes to dating
younger women? Can you do it without money?
When it comes to relateability do you believe that it is possible to find
much younger women (late teens early twenties) who you can relate to
as an older man and connect with? Or is it just the case that they are too
young and have no life experience to be able to relate to you with?
When it comes to girlfriends how do you keep them interested after a
long time together? Is it just that once that honeymoon period and
spark has passed it won't be comming back?
Finally I was reading your article on male scent and found it very
interested that as you become a sexier man and find dealing with girls
stress free it's more efficient not to wear deodrant or cologne. I believe
it is the testosterone/pheromones in male sweat that girls are attracted
too. However what is an acceptable ammont of time to go without
showering etc before talking to girls? I workout every morning and work
a sweat which I'm sure has its effect on women, but as the hours in the
day go by does that musk start to lose its effect?
Money, Matches, Maintenance, and

Musk (/content/attracting-and-datingyounger-women#comment-12016)
AnonOn money, I wouldn't say it's the most important factor - solid
fundamentals has this beat easily. There are plenty of portly,
awkward older men with loads of money who couldn't get anything
under 30 other than a gold digger to save their lives, and plenty of
debonair older men who may not be as well-to-do but are able to do
more than all right with younger women. However, you do need
24/44
12/16/2014
SOME kind of confidence coming from success, and money /

business success is one of the most common of these. You might
also have achieved a high rank in the military, or launched a popular
restaurant or bar (even if it hasn't made you rich), or published a few
books (even if you didn't make as much as J.K. Rowling)... anything
that confers some prestige of accomplishment.
On how well you match... I've seen a few older guy / girl in her teens
or early 20s matches where they relate fairly well, but these tend to
be where the man himself is very young at heart (almost a Peter Pan)
and the girl is very old at heart - usually from poverty and a rough
childhood. In these cases though, the woman very commonly ends
up breaking the man's heart eventually.
On relationship maintenance - self-expansion (/content/self-expansionand-growth-relationships) helps.
(/content/2-year-drop) ,
If you want to avoid the 2 year drop
you've usually got to have children by then, or
sometimes earlier, depending on how into you she is (the less

strongly, the sooner). There's also the alternative of selecting a low
sex-drive woman - the lower a woman's sex drive is, the less
demanding she is in the relationship and the more easygoing.
Women who repress their emotions are also likely to last longer
without children / solid progress, but they aren't necessarily happy
about it, and they're liable to explode if it goes on too long.
On musk - really depends on how strong your scent is. I have a
pretty light scent, for instance, so I can go days without showering
and it's fine. Some men have very strong scents, and these can
become overpowering if they go a day or more without washing
during the summer / when they've worked out. The best thing you
can do here is test - test going certain amounts of time without
showering, and pay attention to how well (or not) women respond to
you. For me personally, my worst responses come right after I've just
showered.
Chase
Does relationship with mother affect how you do with

women? (/content/attracting-and-dating-youngerwomen#comment-11968)
Posted by Wolf on Tuesday, 30 July 2013
Can you please explain to me chase why my mother and I always argue
with each other? I love her to death and she knows I do and I know she
loves me to death also. We've always had each others backs and talk
about everything in life, but for some reason we argue a lot and
sometimes she just annoys me for no reason. I wanted to know why we
argue, how can it stop, and does this have an affect with women in my
life?
Thank you good sir
Arguments (/content/attracting-and-dating-younger-women#comment12017)
25/44
12/16/2014

WolfArguments invariably stem from communication breakdowns. When

two sides are flying past each other in what they're communicate,
they'll fight. Basically, she wants you to do one thing; you want to do
something else. If you really understood WHY she wants you to do
the thing she wants you to do, and she really understood why you
DON'T want to do that thing and instead want to do something ELSE
- REALLY understood it, from an "I get your motivation and feel it
and it makes sense and I totally agree why you want this"
perspective, and you both need to do this - the argument gets
solved.
I'd recommend reading Dale Carnegie's How to Win Friends and
Influence People - you'll never look at arguing the same way again.
Chase
Before I carry on and read (/content/attracting-and-datingyounger-women#comment-11970)
Posted by Matt on Tuesday, 30 July 2013
Before I carry on and read this, will this article be useful for someone in
their early 20s who wants younger women (late teens) or is this more
directed to the middle aged guys?
Relevance (/content/attracting-anddating-younger-women#comment-12018)

MattSkim down near the end to the sub-section entitled "Notes on

Dating Younger Women as a Younger Man."
Chase
Why do Older Men Like Younger Women?/Younger

Men with Old Women? (/content/attracting-and-datingyounger-women#comment-11975)
Why do older men like younger women anyway? (I'm in my 20's so I

can't empathize with them) but say for example that a man is 50...why is
he more attracted to a 27 year old vs a 35 year old or 40 year old? Is it
because the younger women more susceptible to his charms than their
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older counterparts? Easier targets? Or is because of physical beauty

(women who are 27 tend to look more youthful and more attractive than
their older counterparts?)
From my point of view (and I'm open to other POVs), being in my late
twenties, I always liked older women than me...maybe 2 to 10 years
older. Usually I wouldn't know they were older until after I started
talking to them and was already attracted to who these women were as
people. One reason for the attraction was because I'm an inquisitive
chap, I felt like I could relate to/learn from/teach an older, more
accomplished woman (who also due to her age didn't play the kind of
mind games that younger girls tend to play). Another reason was that
when I'd find out she was older than me, my attraction would go in to
overdrive because of the sense of accomplishment of potentially
bagging a sexy, older, accomplished chick. An ego boost. Also, an older
woman tended to be more mature (to me) in terms of her physical looks,
body, dress, style than younger girls, which added fuel to the fire.
Finally, it was always an interesting challenge to see if an older woman
would become submissive to me, a younger dominant man. These kind
of things are just sexy to me for reasons I cannot explain. My heart
simply palpitates and inspires me to try.
So in my mind (as a late-twenties chap), younger girls just weren't on my
radar. Not even 27-year olds...as you mentioned in your article (although
I don't think I'd have any qualms about trying a thing and seeing what
happened with younger women.) In fact 9 times out 10, the woman who
caught my eye due to her looks, smarts, insights, accomplishments,
appreciation of culture and travel, ability to hold deep conversation
about various things, personality, and so on, tended to be older than me.
Just how things played out...it's not like I asked them their age at the
onset of the conversation...sometimes I didn't even ask them their age at
all until way after things led to other things.
But a long time ago when I cared more about the outcome and I debated
who to target (older-vs-younger) I remember what I felt at the time -disgust -- from speaking to younger women than me that had all these
super high standards of what they want in a man, even though the most
(though not all) of the ones that I met didn't measure up to half the
standards they held dear to their chest. So it felt to me at the time like
I'd be the one providing more value to them than they were to me -- a
one-sided transaction -- in return for sex. And let's be real sex isn't that
hard to get, so for me I had no compelling reason to try to seduce
younger girls than me... even though I could tell some were quite
attracted to me. If I had to do it again, I think I'd try to override my
emotions and try hard to can the snob attitude and add more reference
points with younger women.
But anyway since I was not as attracted to younger women (vs older
ones) for reasons mentioned above, I'd like some insight into why many
men in the older-generation like younger girls in the first place. Girls
young enough to be their daughters. I spoken to enough women to hear
them complain about older men all the time...I've even mentioned what
if he's in shape, and accomplished, and to that I almost always hear the
same answer "ewww he's old enough to be my father!!" But maybe it's
true what you said about social status/reputation/societal
ramifications...who knows what those women who bash older men in
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public are really thinking in private??

And since you touched on younger women and what to do with them if
you're older, how about providing some insights on the opposite -- how
to approach an older/mature woman/m.i.l.f. if you are a younger man?
What are the taboos involved? Do mature/established single women
really consider younger men as long term prospects? Say she's 35 and
he's 26? I've had older women tease me about being young enough to be
their cub and I simply tease them right back and tell them they're just
afraid that I'll wear them out...younger guys don't need Cialis. When I
say these kind of bold things to them then all the BS/awkwardness goes
right out the window. I guess they realize I'm not into to walking on
eggshells/playing games and those that are open for anything with me
simply smile and start flirting heavily/shit-testing to see if I'm full of
shit or if I can maintain, and the others who aren't interested still smile
but politely excuse themselves/encourage me to find a woman more
open to my charms. But the way I've been rejected by older women has
usually been very low-key, very social savvy, and rejection like that is
easy... no hard feelings at all. I just smile and ask why couldn't all
rejection be as easy as this?
As always,
Thanks for your insights.
Why People Prefer What They Do

AnonIt's part lack of baggage, part pure base human physiology. Younger
women can reproduce; older women cannot. Younger women also
produce a higher percentage of healthy eggs, are more likely to carry
a fetus to term and not miscarriage, have lower incidences of birth
defects in their offspring, and are more easily impregnated than, say,
pre-menopausal women in their mid- to late-30s. The younger she
is, the more years of fertility she has left on her clock.
Baggage-wise, younger women simply don't have all the
accumulated years of broken promises and unmet expectations that
older women drag behind them into new relationships. They have an
optimism and lack of cynicism that can be quite refreshing to a man
who's been around too many cynical older women who've been
single for far too long.
Your mentioning of disgust with younger women is auto-rejection
(/content/secrets-getting-girls-staying-out-auto-rejection) ; it's the mind's way
of protecting itself from presumed impending rejection by
preemptively becoming the rejecter. Your brain seems to have come
to believe that younger women will reject you as "not good enough,"
so you've become disgusted with them, and enamored with older
women, who tend to be significantly easier to take to bed for most
men than younger women are, and, as you note, are more socially
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refined and, thus, better at taking care of your emotions than

clumsier younger women are.
Normally, most men forge through the seeming abuse, figure out
that it's just blunt / unrefined younger women, and laugh it off and
take the girl to bed and then it's all water under the bridge. It sounds
like there were available older women around when you were
learning women though who acted as an escape valve; rather than
have to learn how to get women your age, you were able to escape to
an easier-to-get demographic of women (this can also happen with,
say, white men who learn to get Asian women or black women
before white women, who are frequently harder for white men to get
than black or Asian women; they end up being permanently bitter
toward white women, because they never learned how to get them,
and having a permanent affection for black/Asian/whatever women,
because those women 'saved' them from loneliness).
On dating older women, see this article: "Younger Men and Older
Women (/content/younger-men-and-older-women) ."
Some older men are open to considering younger men as long-term
prospects, but it's normally a relatively small segment of them. If you
can give them a great and rewarding relationship, they'll often be
guarded, but open. The main fear is abandonment - it's fine when
she's in her mid-30s and you're in your mid-20s, but a woman's
looks fade fast between 35 and 40, and when she hits 40 she'll be fast
on the decline in her attractiveness, while you'll be just coming into
your own as a much more attractive and in-demand 30-year-old
man. Most older women are aware of this - probably more aware of
it than you are just yet.
Chase
Re: Why People Prefer What They Do

(/content/attracting-and-dating-younger-women#comment12023)
"Your mentioning of disgust with younger women is autorejection; it's the mind's way of protecting itself from presumed
impending rejection by preemptively becoming the rejecter."
It wasn't a fear of rejection that caused it. Fear of rejection is
always there at all times to varying degrees because any woman
at any time can reject you regardless of her age, race, or origin.
The only way to deal with it is to try, persist, and if you fail try
again and again with other people. You've mentioned time and
time again that women you took as your girlfriends had advanced
degrees, were strong willed, and so on. Somehow they appealed
to you more so than other women. Would you say that you "autorejected" the demographic of women that you failed to take as
your gfs because you feared that they'd reject you?
To me the younger girls were easier to get than the older women
with advanced degrees/careers, etc. The younger girls were
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more attracted to older men than themselves vs men of equal age

or younger. But what I came to learn very quickly was that I
wasn't nearly as passionate toward nor stimulated by the
younger demographic vs the older demographic. It wasn't just
about the sex or upping my numbers. If it was just about sex then
I'd be indifferent to age. It was was about the experience, the
emotions, the insight, the knowledge, the culture, the
connection, the conversation, the charm. And almost universally,
younger women that I'd meet I felt like "yeah, she's cool, but she
isn't going to last more than a few days/weeks. Maybe we can
just be friends or something." And so it got to the point where I
wanted to stop feeling that way toward women. Instead, I wanted
to meet some that I wanted to keep around because I had strong
feelings for them. And for me, the older demographic tended to
be more alluring and appealing. Not because of their age, but
because of how the person that they were made me feel. If
younger women made me feel that way I'd have no qualms about
age...but 9 times out of 10, they did not.
This all so interesting to me.
building a harem (/content/attracting-and-dating-youngerwomen#comment-11976)
Chase can you do a post on building a harem?
Harems (/content/attracting-and-datingyounger-women#comment-12020)

AnonI imagine you mean an actual harem, where you have multiple female
lovers living with you in a family unit, and not just having a lot of
girlfriends like what Ricardus discussed here (/content/how-datemultiple-women-zero-drama) ,
correct?
If so... so far, my attempts at this have failed (though I got really

close! Lost it in the 9th inning), so it'd be mostly speculation. While I
do still want to try it, I'm pretty convinced that a harem-structure
doesn't work long-term in the West because there is simply too
much social pressure against it. When I've tried it with women in the
past, they'd be happy when with me, but the instant they'd leave and
go off to work or to see their friends they'd start getting bombarded
with people telling them how wrong it was, and they'd become
miserable until I could raise their spirits again. They start out telling
you they're happy with you and don't care what anyone thinks, but
eventually society beats them down and they start demanding from
you what everyone else tells them to demand from you.
The only way a harem probably works is if you build it in a country
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where the society recognizes and supports polygyny... which the

West certainly does not.
Chase
Hey Chase, Since this article (/content/attracting-anddating-younger-women#comment-11977)
Posted by Matt on Tuesday, 30 July 2013
Hey Chase,
Since this article was made for older men, I just wanted to ask you about
writing an article for younger men in the future. I'm pretty sure you
already thought about that, I just wanted to know whether you're
planning one or not. I'm a teenager myself and your site already
changed a lot of my way of thinking and general behaviour, I'd love to
see an article about getting girls with no experience at all, social life in
the high school years and similiar stuff in general.
Looking forwards to it!
Matt
High Schoolers (/content/attracting-anddating-younger-women#comment-12021)

MattEverything here you can use when you have no experience, certainly
- we have a good number of guys on the discussion boards
(http://www.girlschase.com/boards) who came in with zero experience
with women and now have girlfriends and lovers.
As far as high school, yeah - I've made a note that when we get a guy
who can talk intelligently about this, it's something some guys have
expressed interest in reading about. As for me personally, I spent
high school in a weird kind of pseudo-celebrity social phobia
persona who got plenty of attention, invites to parties, and girls
asking him out on dates by being unique and telling stories and
cracking jokes, but never went on any of those dates or to any of
those parties or accepted the people who asked him to be friends, so
my advice there would not be from experience, and I'm loathe to
speculate and give inaccurate advice.
But I do have it on the queue - we have some new writers coming
aboard; I'll see if any of them can talk intelligently about high school
stuff.
Chase
Thank you, Chase! Your article gave me a purpose in life

(/content/attracting-and-dating-younger-women#comment-11989)
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Posted by Danny on Tuesday, 30 July 2013
Dear Chase,
I am really thankful that I noticed your blog in my learning journey of
seduction. Your teaching is not only about banging women and having
causal sex, it is also about lessons on how to make us (guys) improve
into a man which possess status and resource (what women desire).
Good job!
Success (/content/attracting-and-dating-youngerwomen#comment-11993)
Posted by Flames (/users/flames) on Wednesday, 31 July

(/users/flames)
2013
Hello,
Another great post, I did a reply to your other one too but I guess you
missed that, Nevermind.
I've noticed a lot of things you've mentioned in this post, especially the
experience part, as an older man you absolutely have to have the
experience they expect otherwise it seems to throw them off, my
experience with women is probably less than what youd expect for my
age. At the moment I've gained a huge amount of pre-selection which is
helping smooth off a bit of my rough edges, nothing I can't handle. At
the same time I think it creating a bit of a strange situation where girls
are seeing the pre-selection and being dragged into it to a certain
extent and probably wondering what I have? I quite often see girls
staring at me with confused expressions, until such a point when I do
something and then it's like they go 'Oh yeah I get it now' and once that
happens they suddenly start acting like everyone else.
Not sure if that makes a lot of sense, it's about the 'best fit' for the way
girls are acting around me.
Anyway to my main question. How would you define success exactly?
I'm not in a great job, I provide a service, a very useful one but the pay in
itself isnt amazing. I have had better and worse jobs, but this is more or
less where I'm probably going to remain till I retire now (and I'm
relatively happy here). I do have a lot of things o my own, house, car etc
and I make what I have go a long way, by spending and investing wisely.
I've also no major debts (other than a mortgage).
How would you say that goes success-wise?
Regards
Flames
Re: Success (/content/attracting-anddating-younger-women#comment-12022)

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FlamesJust a lithe slow in responding to comments, is all ;)

I think I copy on the preselection - women are seeing you and
wondering what's this guy getting all this attention for, until you
bust out something impressive and they go, "Oh - THAT's why girls
dig him. Hmm!" Yeah - that's preselection for you! Creator of
mystery and intrigue.
Success is about as relative a term as there is. It's going to be relative
for you, and relative for her. If you have a decent-but-not-great job
and no real other stand-out life accomplishments, if your
fundamentals are otherwise in good shape you'll still be reasonably
attractive to a chunk of women. While you might not be Prince
Charming for a girl studying to pass the bar (although you COULD
be!), anyone from a regular girl working a regular job like yours on
down to that sexy Latina working the counter at the taco shop could
find you sufficiently successful for them with where you're at for
right now at 36 (I thought that was your age, if I recall correctly).
Chase
brooding (/content/attracting-and-dating-youngerwomen#comment-12024)
How can you fit a dark, manly and brooding vibe without seeming too
down and negative? You mention in many posts to seem upbeat and sort
of out for adventure, how does that fit into the brooding sort of lost and
dark vibe?
Re: brooding (/content/attracting-anddating-younger-women#comment-12092)

on Friday, 2 August 2013
AnonThis is the "dark" vibe of a guy who's going through a tumultuous life,
and when he smiles, it almost feels like he's doing it more for the
sake of social convention than because he's genuinely happy or
amused. In film, Christian Bale is a master of this mood; Brad Pitt is
another actor you will see do it in certain films.
It's on my list to get a proper article up on, but in the meantime, this
one should help somewhat: How to Be Vulnerable, Enchanting, and
Alluring to Women (/content/how-be-vulnerable-enchanting-and-alluringwomen) .
Maybe think of a brooding guy as someone who just ratchets up the

tension around him everywhere he goes. Some women despise it and
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keep their distances, but other women are drawn to it almost

reflexively because that's their "type."
Chase
Kinds of attractive men (/content/attracting-and-datingyounger-women#comment-12025)
Posted by youngbyron on Wednesday, 31 July 2013
Can you do a post or something on the boards that explains how to give
off those three vibes and make them attractive. Also how to choose
which one?
Templates (/content/attracting-anddating-younger-women#comment-12093)

ByronIt's already on my list!

Chase
Logic... and thanks for the reassurance

(/content/attracting-and-dating-younger-women#comment-12030)
Posted by Marty on Wednesday, 31 July 2013
Hi Chase:
Several of your recent articles have been extremely topical for me,
coincidentally touching directly on what I have most recently been
wondering about. This one is no exception; the one on Approach
Indicators was another great example.
As far as providing "reasons" for your activities goes, am I right in
thinking that these reasons need only address a woman's "feminine"
requirement to check off the "logic" box, as you described in another
article some time ago, so that she can get back to following her
emotions, as opposed to conforming to a rigorous "masculine" concept
of reasoning? That is to say, so long as it sounds plausible and mildly
impressive, it need not be strictly connected with where you are and
what you are doing?
Also, I wanted to convey my appreciation of your counsel not to take it
face value when a woman rejects you ostensibly on grounds of your age.
I suspected as much but it is good to have confirmation that this is
usually due to controllable factors, i.e. things you have done wrong that
can be corrected. I had this happen to me recently after a date with a
girl resulting from a cold approach (out running in the early morning: I
caught up, said hello, memorized her number and ran off ahead). She
told me on our lunch date that she had been admitted to the bar three
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years previously, and considering that this requires four years'

undergrad study and another three years of law school, she must be 2728 at least (although, being a redheaded cutie with soft creamy-white
skin and wide, ultramarine doe eyes, she could probably pass for a 19year-old). I am only in my late thirties. So imagine my surprise when, on
the following morning, I revived this (unsolicited) text:
"I'm uncomfortable with our age gap. Hope you understand."
Patently an excuse for something else, I thought at the time, as there
cannot possibly be more than ten years between us, as described above,
and judging by our relative running paces, I'm in rather better physical
shape at that. Probably I set too much of a "boyfriend" vibe: ironically, as
that is actually impossible in view of my marital status. I think I may
have overdone the humility too and had it verge on self-deprecation...
not a good place to be with an ambitious young attorney. Anyway, thank
you for reinforcing my intuitive conclusions.
-Marty
Logic and Excuses (/content/attractingand-dating-younger-women#comment-12094)

MartyYes, that's right - the main idea here is to check off her logic
requirement. It only has to make sense enough; doesn't have to be
perfect. Like, when I meet someone who tells me that they may be
gone tomorrow from whatever city and they don't even know how
long they'll be in town, for me all kinds of logic questions come up:
wait, what do you do? I don't understand how that makes you have
to leave suddenly. So WHY do you have to leave suddenly? Is there
some OTHER reason? But when you tell most women this, it's logical
enough, and then they're happy to indulge in the romance and
mystery of it: here is this intriguing, vexing man with a life of
adventure and unpredictability.
And that girl yeah, I think everyone's had sudden messages like
that about whatever excuse is most handy when you've made a
mistake or missed an escalation window somewhere along the line.
When it's unprompted and out-of-the-blue, it's almost always autorejection, with her feeling like you didn't like her and/or
didn't/weren't going to give her what she wanted from you, so she
writes you off preemptively to spite you and make you realize she
doesn't need you. In a way, it's both an indication you've got some
attainability work to do, and kind of a compliment (that she viewed
you as high status enough she auto-rejected hard after you didn't do
whatever it was she thought you were going to or supposed to do to
move things forward with her or make her comfortable).
Chase
Asking out a Friend (/content/attracting-and-dating-youngerhttp://www.girlschase.com/content/attractinganddatingyoungerwomen
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women#comment-12044)
Chase,
Thank you for writing this blog, I wish I had read this sooner! I just got
done reading your other blog post "How to Ask a Girl Out" and found the
contents to be very helpful, but I was wondering if you could give me a
little extra advice. I seem to have found myself in what I assume is a
common situation, but one that I haven't found a lot of info about.
Here's the deal:
I just started going back to school, and I met a girl back in January that I
was really interested in. We hit it off quickly, and I asked her out a few
weeks later for Valentine's Day. I got a "Maybe, I'll let you know." that
turned into a "I'm sorry, but I'm too busy to go out with you Thursday
night." I just assumed she wasn't interested, and focused on making sure
things weren't awkward and growing the friendship.
Since February, we've become great friends. I go over her house often,
have had dinner with her family on several occasions, and we get along
swimmingly. Most recently, (In the past two weeks or so.) after not
hanging out with her, or speaking to her much for a few weeks we met
up again randomly. Since then she's been texting me a lot more often,
and has invited me to do lots of stuff with her, a fair degree more than
our relationship has entailed thus far. I'm getting a feeling that she may
be interested in me, but I could also be overly optimistic about the
situation and miss-reading it entirely. These are mostly minor things
like her making my friends know we've been spending time together,
and some comments from her family about how we're the "Perfect
Team".
I would like to ask her out again, but I am very concerned about the
possibility of ruining our friendship over it. Especially after I had
previously asked her out and gotten what amounted to a "No." I do value
her in my life, and would like to remain friends even if she isn't
interested in pursuing a romantic relationship with me. Do you have any
tips on how to navigate this situation, and, if so, what are some good
first date ideas for good friends that have pretty much done all of the
typical first date ideas together as friends? I'm thinking of asking her to
go out and celebrate surviving another school year with me.
Thanks for the help, I really, really appreciate it!
~John
Re: Asking out a Friend

John-
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I'd just ask her out. You asked her out before, and she said "maybe,"
then "no," and it seems like your friendship strengthened after it,
rather than weakened. So I wouldn't worry about the friendship
getting broken.
At this point, if you really do highly value the friendship (and would
continue with it even if she took on a new boyfriend, and you took
on a new girlfriend), I'd go with, "Hey, you know what, you know I
think you're great - I already asked you out before, but you said "no,"
but I'm starting to feel like you like me that way too. Am I totally off
base here - should I be looking for someone else to date, or do you
think you and I ought to give it a shot?" That's the safer path for the
highest odds of keeping her in your life no matter what.
If you'd be heartbroken and probably stop spending so much time on
her if she got a boyfriend, though, then you know it isn't really her
friendship that you want - in that case, I'd just have her come over to
my place one night for dinner and drinks, and kiss her and take her
to bed. That's the higher probability of you actually sleeping with her
and making her your lover, but also a higher probability chance that
it blows up in your face and things get weird if you're too far into the
friend zone and don't escalate perfectly.
You'll have to choose which one is the better fit for where you're at
right now.
Chase
Hey Chase,Just got a labtop

(/users/nick)
Posted by Nick (/users/nick) on Thursday, 1 August 2013
Hey Chase,
Just got a labtop of my own, now i am starting on the html/css then
onto php. I think I remember you saying that you would of had bigger
businesses if you went with programming than writing, could you clarify
on that exactly why that is? Would GirlsChase even exist if you were not
a writer, how would GirlsChase be different if you were a programmer?
Also, you said you had other businesses, are they like GirlsChase where
you give out programs and dispense invaluable advice, if so I would love
to check them out.
Also, over the months I have been reading your posts and you say things
like keeping mystery in the relationship that are monogamous, how
exactly do you do that without cheating?
What is a semi-monogamous relationship?
Also, a post on how *you* yourself have relationships nowadays,( like a
template or a timeline would be fantastic), your personal opinions and
beliefs on relationships and how you came to have those beliefs, why
you will not remain exclusive to a girl for a long period of time, why you
still practice getting girls into your home while in a relationship with a
girl(how do girls fell about this by the way), how to manage rules and
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boundaries within relationships without being thought of

weak/overbreaing,bossy,controlling, how to influence/inspire and
change a womens mindset to one beneficial that will aid her in life in a
relationship, I am trying to think of more things at the moment but
can't, anyway a post on all of those too would be great for lots of people
because I see lots of questions about relationships on the comment
sections.
Also, how long will this website be up( I know you will get tired of it
eventually, if so will you pass it on to someone else so it can stay up?), I
am going to store your book on my computer and a few flash drives so I
can always refresh, but I might start doing that for articles too if they
will be gone(if I am allowed, am I?), your knowledge is too valuable.
Anyway thanks for being alive,
Nick
Questions (/content/attracting-anddating-younger-women#comment-12097)

NickIf I was more a programmer than a writer, Girls Chase would

probably still exist, but it'd likely be a lot closer to it's original
iteration, where it was just an infrequently (~once a month) updated
blog with short articles. It might still be a site with a somewhat larger
collection of articles selling an eBook had a I finished the book as my
"farewell to PUA" swan song as it'd originally been intended to be,
especially if I hadn't gone far into entrepreneurship by that point yet
and didn't know what else I wanted to do then. The other businesses
I've had have all been quite different from this one; they've included
several real estate businesses, one focused on study abroad, a highend paid social club, and some smaller Internet businesses. All but
one of those are closed now, and only half of them ever made any
money.
Maintaining mystery in a monogamous relationship pretty much
requires you to be more sexually experienced with women, to know
always that you have options, even if you aren't pursuing them right
now (having women chasing after you helps, as does having cities or
countries you'd very much like to move to or visit that have the kind
of women that really excite you), and you always need to be a bit less
invested in the relationship than she is (one partner is always more
invested than the other - either a little or a lot; you don't want too
great an imbalance, as that leads to her falling too far in love and
becoming too dependent and also overly sensitive, and to you
becoming bored and annoyed, but a little bit is good).
When I say "semi-monogamous," I'm referring to a relationship
where the girl is monogamous to you and isn't completely sure
whether you are to her or not.
Noted on the post requests. Especially on managing boundaries
38/44
12/16/2014
without being controlling and influencing a girl for her benefit, those
would make for some neat reads.
On how long GC will last, well - my vision for the business is to grow
it large enough that I can fully processize everything in it, and run in
a team of solid managers to keep the ship afloat, that way if I die in a
freak free climbing accident or whatever craziness I'm doing years
from now, the business hardly even notices; new great content from
talented people continues to go up, customer service keeps running,
the bills keep getting paid, and everybody's happy. I have a strong
desire - maybe you could call it a need - to build self-sustaining
systems that can run as I designed them without me; I've always
liked strategy games for this reason (you build empires that do this),
and I've always liked making the people around me self-reliant and
self-supporting, too. It lets you step out, eventually, and not have the
house fall down behind you.
If it turned out that I was a terrible business person (not outside the
realm of possibilities; so far, my record is pretty spotty) and was
never able to grow this business into anything significantly large
enough to become truly self-sustaining without me, and I ended up
with a much better avenue to make ends meet and chase down my
dreams, and it no longer made sense to work on Girls Chase actively,
I'd probably mothball active maintenance but still keep the site up it'd still pay for itself for a long time even with no new content. I
have trouble imagining that happening at this point, though.
And oh, by the way, Nick - it's "laptop", with a "p", because it sits atop
your lap ;)
Chase
building people up (/content/attracting-and-dating-youngerwomen#comment-12187)
Posted by Anonymous on Monday, 5 August 2013
Hey chase I hope your doing alright

I was wondering if you could write an article on empowering people in
general. Basically an article which would tie in all the aspects of being a
good conversationalist/ deep diving, being warm, having high value,
inspiring people to reach their dreams and how to use this to build
faster and stronger connections with all kinds of people. I would like it if
you could explain how to show genuine interest in someone and make
them feel accepted and understood without coming off as fake or a
tryhard. Also how would you switch over from being a social ladder
climber to being a high value person who builds people up?
Concerning dating younger women, how would you get past that stage
where they are initially very cold to you? And could you explain how to
get past that stage with other people?
Social Value and the Hook Point

39/44
12/16/2014
AnonSure, I can do one on empowering - it's just gone on the list.

In the interval, some articles worth checking out that contain
various elements of this:
Tactics Tuesdays: How to Be a Warm Person (/content/tacticstuesdays-how-be-warm-person)
How to Compliment a Girl Like You've Know Her for Years

(/content/how-compliment-girl-youve-known-her-years)
Student of the Game: How to Succeed with Women

(/content/student-game-how-succeed-women)
On being someone who's high in social value, see:

Social Status: Building It and Using It (/content/social-statusbuilding-it-and-using-it)
How to Make Friends? The Master Key to New Friendships

(/content/how-make-friends-master-key-new-friendships)
Guy Talk: Here's How to Kick Butt at Talking to Other Men

(/content/guy-talk-heres-how-kick-butt-talking-other-men)
The stage at the beginning when people are cold with you is the part
of the interaction prior to the "hook point." This has largely to do
with fundamentals - the better yours are, the warmer people will be
across the board on first meeting you, and the easier it is to hook.
See these:
Book Excerpts: Reaching the Hook Point with Girls
(/content/book-excerpts-reaching-hook-point-girls)
How to Attract Women: The Guide (/content/how-attract-womenguide)
Chase
Older women (highschool) (/content/attracting-and-datingyounger-women#comment-12284)
Posted by Andrew on Wednesday, 7 August 2013
Hi Chase,
I have been reading your posts for about a year now and I have to say
that I have made girlschase my single source of information for women.
I would like to ask if you would give some tips on dating older women in
highschool. Currently I am a Sophomore and there is a Senior girl who i
want to have a relationship with.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated,
Andrew
Sophomores and Seniors (/content/attracting-and-dating-youngerwomen#comment-12646)
Posted by Chase Amante (/users/chase-amante) on Friday, 16 August 2013

40/44
12/16/2014
Andrew(/users/chase-amante)
I didn't have any experience dating in

high school, so I can't give you a full picture, but I can tell you that
just generally handling your fundamentals so that you stand out in a
strongly positive, attractive, interesting way, and then putting
yourself in places where girls will run into you, will get you interest. I
had several girls two grades above me ask me out on dates in high
school, including one very good looking and well-endowed senior
girl who asked me to the prom when I was only a 10th grader (if I
could go back and slap some sense into myself just to get old me to
say "YES!" to these invitations, I would).
However, as far as actually going up to the girl of your choice rather
than having her pursue you, that isn't something I have experience
with in high school. I'm afraid any advice I might give you on pulling
the trigger would be speculation; the best I can say is try to catch
her eye first, and if not, well, you only live once - might as well bite
the bullet and try. It's the things we don't do that we regret, not the
ones we do do.
Chase
For those of us in our late 20s (/content/attracting-anddating-younger-women#comment-12509)
Posted by RJ on Tuesday, 13 August 2013
Hey Chase, I definitely agree with your point at the end about a big
enough age gap effecting how two relate to each other. This brings me
to my dilemma, hopefully you could provide some insight on it.
I train athletes, and a recent client of mine is an 18 year old girl who just
went off to college. Not the typical 18 year old you mentioned in the
other article, all about her social status. This one is very mature for her
age. I never really thought much of girls more than 5 years younger than
me other than wanting to sleep with them, but I find this one is special
after working with her for six months.
I personally, at the age of 28, am at that halfway point. Not quite fully
settled in and still fun to go out with, but willing to settle down and well
into my big plans for the future. I feel like I'm still young enough to
relate to this girl, while looking somewhat like that established older
man who knows what he has.
Am I right on how this girl and other younger women will view me
should I display that level of confidence? Also, she has a boyfriend who
is only a year older than her, but I don't see that lasting as they are both
in college and from what I've heard about him, he seems like a guy she
will eventually grow out of. So any other advice you could give me
relating to that as well would be greatly appreciated. Thanks for all the
help you've provided us with on here!
28 and 18 (/content/attracting-and-dating-younger-women#commenthttp://www.girlschase.com/content/attractinganddatingyoungerwomen
41/44
12/16/2014
12648)

RJYou are correct in how you'll likely be viewed, unless she's around
girlfriends her age... in which case, they may tell her, "No way, he's 10
years older than you... that's creepy!" It really depends on her circle
of friends. Because girls in high school and university are only used
to being around males who are at most 3 years older than they are,
anything much more than that seems REALLY old and weird (once
they get out of school and into the real world, this perception
changes very fast, but until then, they're fighting the social norms of
school life).
Something else worth considering - an 18-year-old who's just
starting college isn't anywhere close to where she'll want to settle
down, unless she is very conservative in her upbringing. Even if she
meets an amazing man, she doesn't have the dating experience yet
to know she's found a great catch, and she's going to get an itch after
a while to get back out there and see what else is in the dating pool.
She'll also get a lot of pressure from friends telling her she's too
young for that, and she's got plenty of time to worry about
relationships.
You might have a difficult time getting a college-bound 18-year-old
who's likely to want to embark on a career after school to commit to
a settled, serious relationship for any long-ish amount of time.
Chase
I love older men who............ (/content/attracting-and-datingyounger-women#comment-25917)
Posted by Sick Biatch on Thursday, 3 April 2014
Most women I know (all of us are in our fertile years and most of us have
hot bods and average faces) only want to date men 5 years older than us
at the utmost limit (most say they prefer men their own age though)
For me I'd date someone 20 years older than me like the guy who works
out at the gym who keeps looking at me every morning. He is so fit and
has the hardest sexiest muscles in the gym. He lifts more than the
younger guys and he really does it for me. He keeps looking but wont
come over to me. He puffs his chest out and walks around like he owns
the place. It makes me wet. His grey hairs make me wet. His hair is
receding at the top but despite that his muscles and broad shoulders
make me drool for him.
Another thing is I've heard him teasing the younger guys and girls and
that drives me wild. Furthermore he owns a Merc AMG and which girl
doesn't see a great car as a man who's made it.
Here's the important message to you sexy grandpa's, buy a hot luxury
42/44
12/16/2014
car and give the girl the sexiest stare ever. She will melt. Dont forget to
come over and talk to us because I dont know a girl in my group of
friends who's ever approached a guy. We think that looks desperate.
However, most of us will only see you as short term flings. It's because
our intuition tells us your sperm will not provide the best child (it's
recently been proven in scientific tests most older men have more
children with ADHD and other mental disorders) so the same way you
sense older women who are less than fertile, we seem to have an innate
ability to do the same. Our alternative is to sleep with the young alpha
male, have his baby and take your funds to raise them.
Chase you rock making so many men the sexy dominant men we so
much desire.
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12/16/2014

Tuesday, 16 December 2014

by Chase Amante (/users/chase-amante)

In Part I (/content/dating-younger-women-does-it-make-you-dirty) of this series on

Some of the conclusions we came to include these:

"OMG, he's sooo sexy."

The Older Man Template

guys, for that matter).

What the Science Says

anymore when I encounter

Your body language (/content/sexy-body-language-men-learned-hot-girls) /

Your ability to lead women (/content/real-reason-many-men-cant-get-girl) /

If you've been reading this site, you've got 95% of it already.

Pressure on Younger Women to Conform

groups of opinionated friends - are extremely status conscious, and retain

the West is this:

Older man approaches younger woman in front of her friends

attractive you actually would be to her in another situation.

Approaching Younger Women

Sprezzatura (/content/sprezzatura-effort-and-investing) becomes ever more

get you into more interactions, more smoothly,

and provide an easy entry into indirect game (/content/how-use-indirect-gameget-girls) ,

while direct openers (/content/when-use-direct-openers-versus-situational-

more polarizing, and will lead to strong disapproval from some

women and strong instant attraction from others.

when they aren't interested... but the real reason

Differences Between Older Guy and Younger

you just want to tease her enough that she

older men are expected to have one.

Everything about you, as an older man, must communicate purpose, certainty,

Well, you were on your way to the office, and

Notes on Dating Younger Women as a

a 2008 article in the

journal Child Development.

With younger women, keep the conversation to a minimum, keep things

Relationships with Younger Women

a woman who's a long-term

relationship partner of yours is someone who's going to be very close with

It's an Older Man's Game, Too

Get Your FREE eBook on Texting Girls

Sign up for our email insights series and get a copy of

Get Instant Access

Trying to piece together a seduction strategy bit-by-bit,

Awesome article Chase.

Personal Preferences on Children /

Posted by Chase Amante (/users/chase-amante)

on Wednesday, 31 July 2013

AnonAs far as my personal views, I think children are more or less a

monogamy, and part ways.

Hi Chase! Great post. Your (/content/attracting-and-datingyounger-women#comment-11963)

Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, 30 July 2013

Mixed Signals (/content/attracting-anddating-younger-women#comment-12012)

Posted by Chase Amante (/users/chase-amante)

on Wednesday, 31 July 2013

Great article chase. Just (/content/attracting-and-datingyounger-women#comment-11964)

Posted by James1 on Tuesday, 30 July 2013

a guy who can get a large amount of exceptional looking women. My

Older Men and the Boyfriend Zone

Posted by Chase Amante (/users/chase-amante)

on Wednesday, 31 July 2013

Help needed... (/content/attracting-and-dating-youngerwomen#comment-11965)

Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, 30 July 2013