Daniel Cox

English 1010
Mr. Bangerter
Midterm Portfolio
October 19, 2015

Self Rhetorical Analysis

During the course of my educational experience I never actually
understood the context of rhetorical sensitivity. I've heard the coined
term being tossed around here and there in regards to rhetorical
questions, though not in the context that I've learned it here during the
course of my studies in the English department. Being aware of various
formats and strategies that writers use as their tools has helped me
achieve my goals as a writer not only in the classroom setting, but in
the workforce as well. When we first began looking over various cases
of rhetorical studies I found myself lost in the information as it seemed
overly-complicated at the time. Since then I've gone over the chapter
readings numerous times and found myself to be more open to the
three appeals that were earlier mentioned in the course. These three
appeals have helped me gain an understanding of rhetoric and how it
is used among us as well as within. The assignment that opened the
doors to my understanding of the topic was the literacy assignment.
The topic that went under my discussion revolved around my first
interest of learning in particular, as well as my interest in literacy. I
began the introduction by discussing my current situation and the
setting that I was in at the time. Being so young and engaged in this
world helped me fuel an interest in learning. The scene began in the
classroom with our guidance counselor giving us information about
possible future options. This could be related to by nearly all students
within the states as most of us have had guidance counselors
performing the same tasks regularly each year. With this in mind I
began playing out various questions that I had in my mind in regards to
future colleges and universities across the U.S. as well as other
miscellaneous information. Most classes went off topic anyway at one
point or another in either scenario, and this was a feature that I
entailed throughout my writing. The second paragraph went more into

detail describing how my interest birthed from finding a potential

school to then building the motivation and potential to raise my marks
as a student. The aspects that I kept in mind the entire time were both
the context and audience. By not describing a scenario such as the
classroom, I believe that most readers would not have been engaged
from the beginning and eventually lost their interest. Some of the
points that I made in the second paragraph included my journey from
finding the university off of a youtube video one night, then eventually
getting a tour from my cousin who attended the university of my
interest at that time. By using common grounds such as youtube, this
helps the reader understand more context behind the actual process.
Another aspect that I found key in this point was the appeal to
emotion. Once I was able to establish a sense of scenery at the
university, I could lure my audience into sensing what I was feeling at
the moment around me as well as what I was seeing. This establishes a
strong premise between the readers and writers. The third paragraph
entailed the actual application and letter receiving the outcome. Of
course this facet described the stresses associated and the anxiety
that most students face today. Unfortunately the story did not have a
happy ending though there were some points that I would have liked to
include throughout the self-analysis. One point that I could have
improved on was the actual flow of thought and the sequential orders
that points came across at. Another point I wish to improve was more
appeal to meet my audience, where some points during my readings
were a bit dry in context.

Daniel Cox
English 1010
Mr. Bangerter
Midterm Portfolio
October 19, 2015
Early Papers (Literacy Event)

It was fall of 2009 I was entering the tenth grade I remember and our
guidance couselor entered our English classroom at that time and gave
us an update of what was expected throughout the course of the next
week. She mentioned to us that we had to have a general list of
colleges or universities in mind by the end of that week as well as
possible majors. At that moment I felt completely lost trying to answer
to myself what exactly I wanted to do for the rest of my life. I went
home that day and did some research about possible schools, and to
my despair I wasn't able to come across anything let alone a major in
mind. When my parents got off work and eventually came home I
asked them a few questions about the schools that they had attented.
On my fathers side of the family most of them went to the University of
Washington. After a series of questions I knew I had to dig in more.
Being born in Washington had its advantages in the process, though I
never grew up in the region any more than a few years I still was able
to navigate my way around the towns. There was still something that
was missing in this puzzle that had not intrigued me in general about
continuining education at that time. My grades were not at the top of
the class nor was my motivation anywhere near any of the students
who wished to pursue higher education and become better readers and
writers in the process. It wasn't until I stumbled across an informational
video regarding the University of Washington that changed the course
of my studies.
I came across a youtube video showing a vast amount of opportunities
that the University of Washington held as well as some of the benefits
on the side of going to this school of particular choice. The accidental
run-in with this video occurred late one night when I decided to go off
on a video adventure. On the side of the screen were a few
recommended videos with one of them being the Univeristies ad. I
ended up clicking on it and watching the entire video. To my surprise
this video changed the course of my learning experience forever. I
actually for once had something so motivational that it aided with my
passion for learning years to come. The video covered topics including
the campus experience and the proximity to the Puget Sound, Mount
Raineer, the skiing locations as well as the nightlife. The scenery that
was shown was jaw dropping both on and off campus. The campus was
upkept to the highest standards and there were gardens around the
premises everywhere you looked. People walked the streets at all times
and it was as if the campus never slept. The video also contained

information regarding the various graduate programs the university

had to offer which stood at the nations top premiere schools and these
programs included both legal studies and medicine. I knew at that
moment that that was where I wanted to be in a few years and I was
going to do whatever it took to get there.
It was a year later and I finally had the chance to visit the University of
Washington under a tour that my cousin gave to me at the time. He
ended up showing me some of the schools on campus, the sports
stadium, and the fraternity housing. Outside of the campus were
endless roads with restaurants on every strip you looked. This was the
atmosphere that I was finally looking for. After the tour I was sad that it
was over but I knew that this was now or never. This sparked an
interest unlike any other within me. My grades were beginning to
actually look good for once and I was building my grade point average.
My senior year finally came around and it was time to apply to the
schools of our choice. It came as no surprise that I still had my heart
set on the University of Washinton at that time and there was no going
back. When I applied to the university my academic coursework
showed an increasing level of potential throughout the course of my
studies and I developed an interest within English, reading and
literature. Though I was not at the top of my class, this confidence that
I had developed for myself aided in my learning curve. Once the
application was submitted I felt as if I already made it. I began slacking
off in school again and my grades began taking a turn for the worst for
the second time. Spring came around after what felt like a decade and
I received the letter from the university. After opening the letter the
first words I saw were "we apologize," and the feeling to come became
shame. I knew that I let myself down and my family for not following in
their spolight. Shortly after I was able to finally accept what had come
and adapt to a new nature.
Since then I have finally continued with my studies and regrouped
what I began working on in the first place. Salt Lake Community
College has great programs to offer and many transfer agreements
with many other universities across the state. On one hand it was
upsetting that I wasn't able to go to my school of choice although it
has saved me thousands in tuition which is always a plus. In the future
I hope to make it to graduate school at the University of Washington
though I am still unsure about where I want to end up. In retrospect, if I

were to never have seen the video regarding the opportunities that the
University of Washington had to offer I would have most likely
continued my same course of pattern in regards to my education.
Thankfully this once in a lifetime miracle has led me down a path that
will venture out for years to come and enhance me both as a student
and a writer.

Daniel Cox
English 1010
Mr. Bangerter
Midterm Portfolio
October 19, 2015
Comment and Reviews
Comment I've given
1) Hi Cierra,
It was very interesting reading your article, and I even left with more
information than I imagined. To begin the review, you've done a great
job at organizing your paper into well established thoughts. This
became prevalent throughout your introduction where you addressed
the historical context which gave your audience more of an
engagement, then by later stating the thesis. In the first body
paragraph you clearly stated the problems that face step families and
the approaches used by either the mother or father in this situation.
Another key aspect that I liked was that you also involved the child in
this topic due to the importance that one has within this context.
You've also done a great job at showing the other side of the issue as it
seemed the author was more so "slant" in his viewpoints on behalf of
the families involved. This bias is something that most readers will
miss out on. The other feature that I enjoyed reading were some of the
subjective viewpoints that you stated the author used on the issue as it
added more strength to the topic itself, and maybe some cases where
it contradicted what the author previously wrote. Lastly I would also

point out that the conclusion by which you provided was essential to
the essay because it tied up the information in a clear and thought out
process. Some of the key points included facets regarding healthier
relationships and techniques. It seems as though the author was more
informative to his/her audience rather than trying to move them to
action.

2) Hi Aaron,
This was one of the more interesting articles that I have read and I am
truly happy to say that I've learned quite a bit after reading this. You
have great creativity among your writing and the topic itself was
something that most individuals could relate to. The information that
was presented in the introduction left me as the audience member
engaged in the topic and wanting to know more. A few bits that I would
have developed throughout the essay would be organization, I felt that
some points may have been repeated a few times during the essay,
while others were foreign to the thesis itself. You went into great detail
involving the viewpoints from all the major ethnicities. This helped me
as a reader to understand what the artist was trying to convey in his
message as well as the significance it has on others. Another key point
that I would like to add was the point mentioned about the artist
choosing to perform a song only a couple times. The rhetorical
sensitivity in this example was a true aspect of rhetoric as the artist
understood the context of who, what, and why they were performing
this specific song at a specific location. This was due to connecting
with his target audience.

Comments I've recieved

1) You may want to add some line breaks between paragraphs. If you
dont, your paper just looks like a wall of text and is difficult to read.
Indentations at the beginnings of the paragraphs would help as well.

I see that you mentioned that the author took a systematic approach a

couple of times. Can you give any more detail about that? I didnt
really get how the author showed they were systematic from your
essay.

Do you have any ideas about the intended audience of the article? Any
comments on the medium (NYT website) chosen for this article?
Thoughts about the visual structure of the article? Information on the
author and why they might have chosen to write about the Syrian
crisis? Why the author chose not to include pictures or anything else to
break up the text of the article?

I think you covered the political and social context of the article pretty
well. I just would like to see a little more about some of these details

2) First things first, the paper looks daunting to read because there is
no indenting or spaces between the paragraphs. The analysis part
doesn't look long enough simply by looking at it collectively. You did
good at explaining why the author took the standpoint he did and
analyzing the paper objectively. I couldn't find any grammatical errors
so good job there. Your paper also has a good flow and is a highly
controversial topic. You did talk about a systematic approach towards
the audience but not very much about who the audience is. Other than
that good job!

Commentary
There is a lot that I have learned simply from reading comments made
from students regarding my work and how this has shaped me into a
better writer overall. First off, by reading over various comments I've
decided to take the roughest criteria that I've been given and explain
what I have taken from it. The comment above (2) states a very
interesting and insightful perspective from an audience member who
may have not understood the assignment. It was great they went
ahead and mentioned that they were not able to understand who the
audience was. The simple answer to this is because the assignment

was non-biased, but rather an informative one. A great point made was
that it was daunting simply due to the fact that there weren't any
spaces which would have made it easier to read for them. I understand
that I will need to enhance more on the indenting upon paragraphs in
the near future. The comments that I've given regard a vast amount of
information a writer needs to enhance for themselves which include
organization, flow, technical aspects, and much more. I've read over
various writing from students and we've all grown as writers just
throughout these last few months. This includes our awareness with
not only rhetorical writings but much more, and as the semester
progresses we will only begin to grow as more advanced writers.

Daniel Cox
English 1010
Mr. Bangerter
Midterm Portfolio
October 19, 2015
Text Analysis
Summary:

U.S. says rebel it trained surrendered materials in Syria

Over the course of the last four years a civil war has broken out in
Syria. The intial protests that began in Tunisia became an international
movement to oust current leaders due to high levels of corruption,
unemployment, political repression as well as lists of other factors. The
protests eventually led to a backlash from the Syrian government
leader Bashar Al Assad. Since the backlash the country has been
demolished in nearly every corner of the nation. The value of the

currency has dropped down to a sixth of its pre-war value. Infastructure

has been ruined including more than half the hospitals. The country of
Syria is currently ran by a minority leader (Alawite) which presently
makes up almost twelve percent of the population. With a country of
twenty one million it has seen vast amounts of change throughout the
course of its time. The United States has taken steps against the
regime to strengthen the rebels and arm them with the right
equipment.
The issue at stake among the article read became evident that the
United States has been supplying individuals with materials that end
up in the wrong hands afterall. In a recent statement made before
senate the U.S. program for training these Rebels has become an
outright failure. With half a billion dollars put forth to back these
training programs, we have established four maybe five rebels who are
on the US coalitions side of this fight against the regime. It was in our
favor to train a number of five thousand Syrian Rebels which has come
nowhere near these figures. Recent findings state that a member
whom we have personally trained has given up his materials (ammo,
trucks, guns etc). The rebel commander has since then given his
testimony claiming before USCENTCOM that this was an exchange for
safe passageway on the Nusra Front. General Lloyd Austins III gave his
perspective on the escalating situation stating on his behalf, "we have
lost control over both our personnel and equipment in these regions.
The United States came across this information as Al Nusra posted an
image of the materials beforehand exchanged by the rebel himself so
that he could re-enter Syria. Prior to this knowledge our military
officials have denied the handover as it may have conflicted with the
guidelines set for the training programs established by the U.S.

Analysis:

News agencies from all over the world have been covering the
intelligence that has been coming out of Syria for the past four years.
Ever since the Arab spring took place and became mirrored across
other Arab nations, backlash has been seen from the Syrian

government. The article titled "U.S. says rebel it trained surrendered

materials in Syria," has given us an insight look as to what is going on
within the country that was once boasting economic growth. Since
Americas involvement in this region became initiated, spectators have
widely criticized the intentions that our government has for the state.
The author of the article has used a systematic approach to engage his
audience and meet their understanding of our involvement overseas.
The approach that was used throughout the article became more so a
methodological approach incorporated with problem solving
techniques. As an audience member I was able to distinguish the issue
at stake and its importance. Being that the author discussed the United
States half billion dollar plan set aside to train thousands of armed
rebels has become a failure due to the intentions of these rebels when
given equipment and other valued materials either for safety or
finances. The author went on to describe these intentions in more of an
economic perspective to give us a look into the psychology fueling
these individuals decision making. This provides a background
understanding of societal importance and draws upon a picture to help
us understanding cultural differences among these regions. The other
aspect that I would like to draw upon was the fact that the reader gave
us evidence on the issues as well. The media used twitter images from
these terrorist organizations to prove that the resistance is growing
stronger. U.S. officials were able to identify the materials via social
networks and trace it down to the individual who sold the goods. I am
able to draw the conclusion that the author is not in favor of the United
States involvement within the region and disagrees with the programs
set forth by our government to supply these individuals.
The author of this article has a purpose which they have shared
deliberately through a systematic technique used to relate and engage
his or her audience members. The purpose of the author was to inform
and act upon this segment. To inform the audience of the policies that
our country has initiated internationally helps gain a deeper knowledge
of the failures that have been addressed before congress. Examples of
this that the author used were the facts that our army general
addressed in a meeting that we have lost control of both our
equipment and personnel in the region. From the 5,000 rebels that we
were to train under the 500 million dollar program, we only have
constituted nearly five current rebels. The reasons behind acting upon
this were because of his arguments that there is no such thing as

government money. The money used by government is ours to decide

and plan forth.
Some information to draw upon were the objections that may have
been raised by a select few individuals. People who oppose U.S. foreign
policy believe that we are initiating fascism and conducting mass
murder on the behalf of corporate profit as well as political dominance
within the territory. Some of the images provided by the author go as
far as using war photos of both wounded civilians and soldiers. After
reading this article I was still left open to persuasion and was able to
read other viewpoints among other critics.

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/09/26/world/middleeast/us-says-rebel-ittrained-surrendered-materiel-in-syria.html?_r=0 (Links to an external

site.)