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Cai Kunheng
Dr. Lynda Haas
Writing 39C
25 August 2015
Reflection Essay
Talking about the research-based essays I have wrote in the span of ten weeks, I shall use
HCP project, AP project, and SMC project to mainly illustrate the improvements I have
accomplished, alongside with explanations of my decisions on the aspects of credible material
choosing, scientific research sorting, and essay ethos affirming.
Since writing 39C is research oriented, every single statement or opinion should be
proved by credible resources. According to the AP prompt, Each section of the essay will be
researchedauthoritative, credible sources should be part of your writing in every paragraph.
All projects require massive of authoritative sources. Thus, my ability of searching efficiently
was massively enhanced during this process. These two websites: Google Scholar, and Web of
Science are great databases which provide scholarly data and research papers. Randomly typing
keywords in Google search bar and gather whatever information they present were only
acceptable to the stage of brainstorming. I was lacking the ability of selecting information, hence
my essay was usually too broad to concentrate on one issue. For example, my first problem
draft of the AP project aimed to advocate the worldwide stray dogs problem and was faulty to
reach the requirement, As you build your discussion of the problem, answer these questions:
who, what, where, when, and why? (Dr. Haas). The requirements clearly indicate the problem
should be defined as incisive as possible, hence the worldwide was too broad to qualify the
criteria. According to professor Haass reflection, she challenged the availability of my idea

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because therefore you'd have to find a law or policy that would cover two countries (this would
never happen). That's why you need to make your frame smaller. Therefore, I narrowed my
search string and concentrated on the problems of Indian stray dogs overpopulation and rabies.
After redefining the problem, another problem appeared. There were too many available papers
to sort. After a long period of filtering, I have initially selected 16 papers (the screenshot below)
which correlated with the problem section, but only 3 of them have been quoted in the first draft
because selecting sources and arranging them asked compelling logos and credible ethos.
Therefore, this process showed me that obtaining legitimate papers requires correct searching
string, while using them asks compelling logics.

Figure 1: papers for first AP draft

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Gathering scientific information on correct websites with credibilities is like preparing

authentic materials for an entree, only an experienced chef knows how to arrange these valuable
sources properly; and smooth transitions are like ingredients, which endows the entree with
savory taste. Except the ability of searching data, I have also improved how to transit ideas. For
instance, the AP project asked the most intensive amount of researches, which can easily distract
a writers attention. Thus, it also required the clearest logic among three projects, and the last
sentence of every paragraph worked as the transition In order to connect ideas. For examples,
here are all of the transitions in the problem section of AP project:
1. Therefore, eradicating rabies requires diminishing the population of stray dogs.
2. However, tracing down to the root of the stray dogs overpopulation, the flooding
of stray dogs is totally caused by poor sanitary condition.
3. Therefore, calling a halt of the stray dog overpopulation is requisite to eradicate
the nationwide rabies problem.
4. However, if halting the stray dogs culling saves their life, what about the lethal
rabies they carry with? It does not seem rational to save stray dogs instead of humans. As
a matter of fact, it should not be a dilemma. Neutering and spaying provide valid
approaches to control the population of stray dogs without harm at the same time.

As you can see, each transition was followed by a clear logic, and brought this flow to the
next section from the last transition. These well balanced yet rational transitions helped me cite
and write clearly.
Presenting the SMC project (Fix At Six) enabled me understanding the significance of
rhetorical knowledge. Rhetorical knowledge includes targeting audience, the concentrated
content,technology and mechanism. For the targeting audience, it asks different strategies to
argue problems with scholar audience from ordinary public readers. For example, ordinary

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readers usually concentrate on visually elements such as pictures and graphs, while scholar
audience mainly looking for ethos and credible evidences, which are based on stats instead of
colorful, interesting graphs. Thus, pondering my audiences were mainly dog owners who
persuade to know about neutering and spaying, and are usually well educated but yet familiar
with this specific case, I needed to combine interesting graphs with scientific data in order to
pitching-in shallow, then digging-in deep. Audiences will, thus get enough education without
feeling dry and boring while reading. As the project contractors, we have to maintain the oneness
of the website, any content beyond Dogs neutering and spaying was unwelcome, included
cats neutering and Homeless dogs. Restricted contents limited the range of potential
audience, but increased the efficiency by precisely appealing the target audiences, and we have
successfully gained 35 followers in only one week.

Figure 2: screenshots of Fitatsix Twitter account

The success of Fixatsix was based on many reasons, such as the clear-targeting audience, and
eyes grabbing infographics. Besides, solid contents with clever highlighting words can
strengthen the impression of our topic.

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Figure 2: SMC project infographics and blog (with highlighted words) screenshots

I have searched that highlighting words (no more than three words) in each paragraph would
sufficiently appeal readers attention, according to the book Confessions of a Website Copywriter.

Figure 3: the reason why I highlighted words with different colors in my blog

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Figure 4: great feedbacks of highlighted words usage from Huynh and Nesley

Searching useful resources, analysing and publishing them smartly helped us successfully
promote our Fixatsix project, and gave me a better vision about the significance of rhetorical
knowledge.
In addition, peer review provided me unexpectedly enormous benefits, especially for my
HCP draft. According to the study To give is better than to receive: The benefits of peer review
to the reviewers own writing by Kristi Lundstrom and Wendy Baker, reviewers usually
improve more than receivers. However, since I have both reviewed Paulas work and received
comments from her, I have realized the benefits are adequately equal to me. For example, she
pointed out my essay was off topic, as I listed the thesis dogs domestication but mainly talked
about coevolution. Therefore, I reevaluated my work and found the coevolution, in a biology
aspect, was the point I wanted to elaborate instead of dogs domestication which asked massive
literacy contents. Thus, I have cleared my perspective as a receiver.

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(Figure 4: I changed the HCP topic based on peer review)

Standing as a peer review giver, I usually spent more than 6 hours on each of my peers
work. By following the instructors advice, I would at least read through my peers essay two
times before editing or commenting. When I understood the full context with clear prospect of
his/her core information, then I would start to carefully put reasonable yet polite comments (I
tried my best to be as polite as possible). Below are graphs that show my commenting works and
sincerely advice to different peers. From the gain side, when I peer reviewed other AP projects, I
would automatically compare my essay with his/her work and try to gain experience from a
reviewers angle, and have always found creative ideas in other students work For example,
Paulas HCP draft showed me how to cite and annotate citations correctly; Zicongs HCP draft
presented me how to connect ideas with adequate transitions; Tongs reflection essay showed me
the importance of Habit of Mind. All in all, processing peer review helped me to understand
my major flaw, and also offered me the chance to see how other people reached the same topic
with various approaches, and this finding progress inspired me with tons of thoughts.

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Figure 5: All of my sincere comments (yellow highlights and green tabs at right side of the
window) towards to different peers.

Learning how to introduce the credibility of cited authors was another dimension that I
have improved. I used to start body paragraphs with personal statements in HCP draft one, which
was considered lack of credibility and persuasiveness since the essay was totally research
oriented; all I needed was impartially credible resources analyzing instead of opinion or personal
ideas. Therefore, I forced myself to adopt this scholarly strategy, and started to begin all my body
paragraph with credible resources followed with author annotations. Figure 5 & 6 are two of the
revisements that can present I have improved from full of personal statements to credible
resources.

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Figure 5: Subjective statements lack of strong evidence, HCP draft 1

Figure 6: Supporting personal statements with credible resources, HCP draft 2

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As you can clearly see here, I have changed my writing style and attempted to express scholarly
with persuasive yet credible sources. I am still trying to cite and annotate resources better.
I have learned how to appreciate literary works such as the Pride and Prejudice by Jane
Austen at writing 39A; I have learned the genre of horror at writing 39B and accomplished a
horror movie analyze at the end of the quarter; I have gone through the animal advocacy in this
writing 39C and realized there are many shady areas beneath the well covered pets market.
Specifically speaking, this class requires me to view a trending animal advocacy in a scholar
angle, and it was quite hard for me to digest at the first time. Only with massive investigation I
can thereby conquer this topic.
The curiosity and openness I have generated during these ten weeks are tremendous. I
have always wanted to be a vet so that I can help disabled, and homeless pets.

However, after investigating serious animal advocacies, which the contents have opened my
eyesight and the seriousness triggered my curiosity. The illegal fur market, ivory business, shady
orca captivity, and atrocious dolphin massacres are concerning not only the whole animal world,
but also human society. Thus, the writing 39C course has equipped me with acknowledge of
evoking advocacies, and how to promote their effect on social medias efficiently. Among all of
the Habits of Mind, the engagement that I have generated during this class was valued the
most. I used to read animal related articles from mainstream websites or social medias, which

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equipped with neither scholarly ethos nor extensively scientific data. Therefore, reviewing
animal advocacies based on scholarly resources was quite challenging for me because it required
fluent English reading ability, which I lacked the most. For example, searching proper materials
from Google scholar looked impossible due to its endless results, but narrowing searching
criteria can instantly decrease the number of results but increase the pertinence. I have largely
improved my engagement on reading skill during material searching of the three projects, and I
am glad that I have survived and surprisingly enhanced my habit of engagement. This process
helped me to build confidence of reading and comprehending scientific materials, the ability of
arranging sources with logic transitions, the prospect of sending helpful peer reviews, and the
most important, the idea of how to analyse a trending animal advocacy and using social media to
spread them, which is considered as an efficient method. According to Shirky, Professor of
Media Studies at NYU, claims his impressions about social media in his TED presentation, he
says the moment were living for the moment our historical generation is living is the largest
increase an expressive capability in human history. The size and complexity of nowadays social
medias are enormous. Propagandize animal advocacy on social medias such as websites and
blogs is considered wise and efficient. Promoting our SMC project on social media helped me to
realize the immensity and sophistication of social media.
Coordinately, there are some aspects still undermine the quality of my writing, and
remain awaits for improvements. For example, grammar mistakes, they happen repetitively
among all my essays, and interrupt audiences reading flow continuously. By quoting my week
ones blog, I am an international student, grammar and language using always concern me the
most. I tried my best to seek help from the UCI writing center, peer tutors and office hours.
Unfortunately, I am neither able to use the UCI writing center nor receiving help from tutors

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because I am out of America, all revisions, thus were completed by myself thoroughly.
Grammers mistakes have weaken the strength of my arguments by confusing readers, and I have
tried my best to revise all possible ones. In future, I will try hard to eliminate errors as much as
by repetitively proofreading, and seeking helps from peer tutors or the UCI writing center in
future.

Figure 6: Dr. Haass advice on my grammar mistakes

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Work Cited
Irvine, Leslie. If You Tame Me: Understanding Our Connection With Animals (Animals
Culture And Society): Leslie Irvine, Marc Bekoff: 9781592132416. Temple Up, n.d. Web.
20 July 2015.
Lundstrom, Kristi, and Wendy Baker. "To Give Is Better than to Receive: The Benets of Peer
Review to the Reviewers Own Writing." Journal of Second Language Writing (2009): 3043. Web.
Shirky, Clay. "How Social Media Can Make History." TED@State. June 2009. TED. Web. 25
Aug. 2015.

Hello! Great work, loved reading your reflection. Here are my top 3 suggestions for you:
1. It was unclear if the last paragraph was your conclusion. It ended abruptly, so
either try fixing that paragraph into a more concluding paragraph or write a new one
where you wrap all all your main ideas of this essay.
2. Sentence fluency- I agree this is difficult! You have great ideas, it just feels like
you are blurting out your statements instead of linking them together
3. i highlited some areas where you need to be more detailed :)