E N G L I S H

1 1 4 B

Hutton Tendler
Final Project

Look deep
into nature,
and then you
will
understand
everything

Essay Introduction

Ultimately, my essays relate to the way our society

represents itself, and how we are harming our selves
and our own environment. My first essay is about the
I am a first year student here at CSUN. I was born and raised in the valley. I joined a sorority this year,
negative impact of consumerism and examining
spaces. For this essay, we had to go out and do
ethnographic observations to get a better
understanding of the assignment. I felt that the
space we chose to examine was too focused on
consumerism, which is harming the environment and
the shoppers self-esteem. My second essay is about
the medias effect on a hyper-sexualized society. The
media is constantly promoting sex for buyers and
ratings and it has gotten out of hand! Females and
adolescents are insecure and willing to do whatever
it takes in order to look the way celebrities do on the
TV. If they arent physically harming themselves, then
it is definitely taking a toll on them mentally. These
two essays are very different but it is clear that they
both relate to our environment and the people in it

About Me

THE LOREM IPSUMS

SUMMER 2016

I am still learning.
-Michelangelo

Essay One: Project Space

For my first essay, I chose to write about the
negative impacts of consumerism due to our
ethnography research. I felt it was important
for readers to understand that the space
around us can be used more wisely than it
has. This information is beneficial to readers
due to the significance of the harm being done
to our environment.

Essay One: Revisions

For my first paper I made several revisions to grammatical errors. I also changed some of my sources

Essay Two: Project Text

My second essay about the negative impact
that media has on our hyper-sexualized
society. I believe it is important for the
reader to see how the media uses sexuality
to persuade listeners and viewers. This can
take a toll on our society due to individual
lack of confidence. This cannot only be
mentally unhealthy, but also physically.

Essay Two: Revisions

For my second paper I mostly made
grammatical corrections. I also added more
evidence to support my claim, including
credible background for sources. Lastly, I
clarified some of my thoughts that were
unclear to the reader.

Personal Reflections
Over the course of the semester my
writing has improved, in my opinion. I
took Mr. Kublers class last semester,
and I enjoyed his class so much that I
decided to take his class again. I have
learned a lot about writing in the past
year. Last semester I was mostly
focused on how to write a paper that
was more advanced than 5 paragraphs.
This semester I have been focused more
on the little details. I have had trouble
with keeping my argument clear and in
one direction, so that is the most
important thing I have been working on
and improving in. I believe I have also