Sermon Title: Righteous, Holy Interactions

Attention: Good morning. Im entitling the sermon this morning Righteous, Holy Interactions.
If you have your Bibles with you I would ask you to turn to Ephesians 4:25-32. When I was in
high school there was a guy in my class that had anger issues. He would blow up at people for
pretty much no reason. He then would go to chapel and praise and worship God. He then would
possibly blow up several more times at people throughout the day. We are supposed to have
righteous anger, but I'm pretty sure that's not what righteous anger looks like! What does real
righteous anger look like? If you will now look in your Bibles to Ephesians 4:25-32. Ephesians
4:25-32.
Need: Are you being holy in dealing with people each and every day?
Textual Idea statement: Paul wrote here to the Ephesians to teach them how to be holy
in the way they dealt with each other.
Scripture: Ephesians 4:25-32
25 Therefore, laying aside falsehood, SPEAK TRUTH EACH ONE of you WITH HIS
NEIGHBOR,

for we are members of one another. 26 BE ANGRY, AND yet DO NOT SIN; do

not let the sun go down on your anger, 27 and do not give the devil an opportunity. 28 He
who steals must steal no longer; but rather he must labor, performing with his own hands
what is good, so that he will have something to share with one who has need. 29 Let no
unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for
edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who
hear. 30 Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of
redemption. 31 Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away
from you, along with all malice.32 Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each
other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.
Sermon Idea statement: God wants us to be holy in the way we deal with other people.
Interrogative: What does it look like to deal with other people in a holy way?
Transition: Paul gives us three ways to interact righteously and holy with others.
Replacing Personal Anger with Christ-like Anger, Replacing Unbiblical thinking with
Forgiveness, and Speaking with AGE.
Point 1: Replacing Personal Anger with Christ-like Anger. (V.26-27)

You know, We as humans can get extremely angry, some more than others. We tend to see this
anger being a wrong attitude, but is it wrong to get angry? In Matthew 21:12-13 we see Jesus
get angry. The verses say this, 12 And Jesus entered the temple and drove out all those
who were buying and selling in the temple, and overturned the tables of the money
changers and the seats of those who were selling doves. 13 And He said to them, It is
written, MY HOUSE SHALL BE CALLED A HOUSE OF PRAYER ; but you are making it a ROBBERS
DEN.

So, if Christ can get angry then shouldnt we be able to be angry too? Anger is one of

the many emotions that we as humans have. Of course, emotions themselves arent sinful, the
problem comes in the way that we respond to the emotion that we have. If were angry were to
be angry in a biblical way. The sin comes when we are angry in an unbiblical way. So, how can
we be angry biblically without sinning? How can we be Christ-like in our anger? The bible
gives us four specific criteria for anger to be Christ-like, righteous anger.
A. Christ-like Anger is Slow in coming. (James 1:19) This you know, my
beloved brethren. But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to
anger;
Explanation - I gave the illustration at the beginning of this sermon about my
classmate that had anger issues. Things set him off so easily. James 1:19 tells us that
we are to be slow to anger. My friends, if things set us off easily is that being slow to
anger? No, its not. Thats being hot headed and having a quick temper.
James says to be quick to hear and slow to speak. Do you exercise listening more
than speaking? You know, its interesting -- we as people tend to have more of a
quick, hot temper when we exercise speaking more than we do listening!
Illustration - A lady once came to Billy Sunday and tried to rationalize her angry
outbursts. "There's nothing wrong with losing my temper," she said. "I blow up, and
then it's all over."
"So does a shotgun," Sunday replied, "and look at the damage it leaves behind!"
Explanation - Friends, When we are quick to anger we can leave so much damage to
others in our wake. However, to be Christ-like in our anger.

Illustration - Many years ago a senior executive of the Standard Oil Company
made a wrong decision that cost the company more than $2 million. John D.
Rockefeller was then running the firm. On the day the news leaked out, most of the
executives of the company were finding various ingenious ways of avoiding Mr.
Rockefeller, lest his wrath descend on their heads. There was one exception, however;
he was Edward T. Bedford, a partner in the company. Bedford was scheduled to see
Rockefeller that day and he kept the appointment, even though he was prepared to
listen to a long harangue against the man who made the error in judgment. When he
entered the office the powerful head of the gigantic Standard Oil empire was bent over
his desk busily writing with a pencil on a pad of paper. Bedford stood silently, not
wishing to interrupt.
After a few minutes Rockefeller looked up. "Oh, it's you, Bedford," he said calmly. "I
suppose you've heard about our loss?" Bedford said that he had. "I've been thinking it
over," Rockefeller said, "and before I ask the man in to discuss the matter, I've been
making some notes."
Bedford later told the story this way: "Across the top of the page was written, 'Points
in favor of Mr. _______.' There followed a long list of the man's virtues, including a
brief description of how he had helped the company make the right decision on three
separate occasions that had earned many times the cost of his recent error.
"I never forgot that lesson. In later years, whenever I was tempted to rip into anyone, I
forced myself first to sit down and thoughtfully compile as long a list of good points
as I possibly could. Invariably, by the time I finished my inventory, I would see the
matter in its true perspective and keep my temper under control. There is no telling
how many times this habit has prevented me from committing one of the costliest

mistakes any executive can make -- losing his temper.

Application - So, are you being hot headed and having a quick temper or are you
being slow to anger as James tells us to be? To be Christ-like with anger we must be
slow to anger.
B. Christ-like Anger Doesnt Lead to Sin. (V. 26)
Explanation - Displaying selfish anger can lead to sin. However, Christ-like anger
will never lead to sin. We tend to want to hold on to our selfish anger. The reason
that selfish anger leads to sin is because we want what we want, not what God wants.
For us to be Christ-like, we have to give up our rights of justice and vindication
because when Christ died for us, He relinquished all of the rights He naturally had
because He was God, and He also gave up His human rights. To be Christ-like, is to
give up our rights in the same way; its all part of dying to self in surrender to God.
Galatians 2:20 says, I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I,
but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the
faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me. If were
expressing anger in a Christ-like way, we wont sin.
C. Christ-like Anger Doesnt Last Long. (V. 26)
Explanation - Frederick Buechner said this, Of the 7 deadly sins, anger is possibly
the most fun. To lick your wounds, to smack your lips over grievances long past, to
roll over your tongue the prospect of bitter confrontations still to come, to savor to the
last toothsome morsel both the pain you are given and the pain you are giving
back--in many ways it is a feast fit for a king. The chief drawback is that what you are
wolfing down is yourself. The skeleton at the feast is you.
Application - Friends, we tend to want to hang on to our selfish anger and nurture it.
We have to let go of our selfish anger. Will you today let go of whatever selfish
anger you may be hanging on to?
D. Christ-like Anger Doesnt Let the Devil in. (V. 27)
Explanation - Like I said before, its easy for us as people to hang onto our selfish
anger. I have found out that when I do that, I tend to talk to people about it. I dont
know why I want to, but somehow talking to people about my anger and rallying

them to my side makes me feel accomplished. Friends, when we do this we cause

division among our fellow brothers and sisters. This is exactly what Satan wants!
When he gets us to cause division in the church, this gives him the opportunity to
come into the Body of Christ and cause even more problems. Christ-like anger
doesnt cause division among the Body of Christ, so it doesnt give the devil an
opportunity. To avoid the wrong kind of anger, we need to do what 2 Corinthians
2:10-11 says. It says, for your sakes forgave I it in the person of Christ; Lest
Satan should get an advantage of us: for we are not ignorant of his devices.
Transition statement: According to Paul there in 2 Corinthians, the way to avoid
Satans devices, is through forgiveness.
Sermon Idea statement: God wants us to be holy in the way we deal with other people.
Point 2: Replacing Unbiblical thinking with Forgiveness. (V. 32)
A. Illustration - In "The Christian Leader," Don Ratzlaff retells a story
Vernon Grounds came across in Ernest Gordon's Miracle on the River Kwai. The
Scottish soldiers, forced by their Japanese captors to labor on a jungle railroad, had
degenerated to barbarous behavior, but one afternoon something happened. A shovel
was missing. The officer in charge became enraged. He demanded that the missing
shovel be produced, or else. When nobody in the squad budged, the officer got his
gun and threatened to kill them all on the spot . . . It was obvious the officer meant
what he had said. Then, finally, one man stepped forward. The officer put away his
gun, picked up a shovel, and beat the man to death. When it was over, the survivors
picked up the bloody corpse and carried it with them to the second tool check. This
time, no shovel was missing. Indeed, there had been a miscount at the first check
point. The word spread like wildfire through the whole camp. An innocent man had
been willing to die to save the others! . . . The incident had a profound effect. . . The
men began to treat each other like brothers. When the victorious Allies swept in, the
survivors, human skeletons, lined up in front of their captors (and instead of attacking
their captors) insisted: "No more hatred. No more killing. Now what we need is
forgiveness." Sacrificial love has transforming power.

B. Explanation -You know what? Forgiveness can be really hard. It can be

extremely hard to let go of that anger that we have and forgive. All of us at sometime
or another have justified the anger that we feel towards a person or group of people,
but that's not Christ-like anger. Remember, Christ-like anger is always 1) slow in
coming, 2) doesn't give way to sin, 3) is of a short duration, and 4) doesn't let Satan
get a foothold in the situation. There are several things this passage mentions that we
need to forgive others for, but we also need to start fulfilling ourselves. Are you
putting away lying, stealing, bitterness, wrath, etcetera? If you arent then how can
you expect to forgive those doing these things to you? So, if you arent forgiving are
you meeting Gods standard for Christ-like anger? No, youre not. You see, more
often then not our anger doesnt meet the requirements for it to be Christ-like anger.
We need to turn the situation over to God by forgiving those who have wronged us.
C. Explanation - Even when we have forgiven those who have wronged us
its easy to feel like we really havent - but remember, forgiveness isnt a feeling.
Satan would love to confuse and deceive us into thinking that we are still sinning by
not forgiving like we should -- but just because we forgive someone doesnt mean
well automatically forget!
Illustration - Corrie ten Boom told of not being able to forget a wrong that had been
done to her. She had forgiven the person, but she kept rehashing the incident and so
couldn't sleep. Finally Corrie cried out to God for help in putting the problem to rest.
"His help came in the form of a kindly Lutheran pastor," Corrie wrote, "to whom I
confessed my failure after two sleepless weeks." "Up in the church tower," he said,
nodding out the window, "is a bell which is rung by pulling on a rope. But you know

what? After the sexton lets go of the rope, the bell keeps on swinging. First ding, then
dong. Slower and slower until there's a final dong and it stops. I believe the same
thing is true of forgiveness. When we forgive, we take our hand off the rope. But if
we've been tugging at our grievances for a long time, we mustn't be surprised if the
old angry thoughts keep coming for a while. They're just the ding-dongs of the old
bell slowing down." "And so it proved to be. There were a few more midnight
reverberations, a couple of dings when the subject came up in my conversations, but
the force -- which was my willingness in the matter -- had gone out of them. They
came less and less often and at the last stopped altogether: we can trust God not only
above our emotions, but also above our thoughts."
Explanation - Forgiveness shifts your focus from your anger and desire for revenge to
seeing that person from Gods perspective. It is up to God whether He carries out
retribution or not.
Application - If you have a burning desire for God to carry out retribution on
someone else, think of how much you deserve retribution from God for what you
have done! We shouldnt be seeking out retribution, my friends. No, we should be
thanking God for the grace and forgiveness that He gives us every day!
Transition statement: Once we have changed the way we think, and have refocused
to Godly thinking, what will come out of our mouths will be a result of Godly
thinking. So far we have looked at what true Christ-like Anger looks like, weve
looked at replacing our unbiblical thinking with forgiveness, and so for my final
point lets look at what should come out of a Christians mouth but who has chosen
to forgive.

Sermon Idea statement: God wants us to be holy in the way we deal with other people.

Point 3: Speaking with AGE. (V. 29-31) Let no corrupt communication proceed out of
your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto
the hearers. And grieve not the Holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of
redemption. Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamor (any sort of shouting),
and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice:
Im going to give you an acronym that sums up these three verses and serve as a standard that we
can use to know if the words that are coming out of our mouths are truly Christ-like. It is called
AGE or speaking with AGE.
A.

A= Appropriate. That which is good.

B.

G= Gracious. That it may administer grace unto the hearers.

C.

E= Edifying. To the use of edifying.

Words that fail to meet this criteria are not only called corrupt communication, but they also
grieve the Holy Spirit! (V. 30-21) Lets pray that God would help us to speak with AGE, because
the Holy Spirit is a sensitive spirit and every spirit-filled believer desires to bring Him pleasure,
not pain. (A. Brown)
Transition statement: Paul, through the inspiration of God, has given a command to
every Christian to not allow unbiblical thinking and behavior influence the
Christian life.
Sermon Idea statement: God wants us to be holy in the way we deal with other people.
Visualization: Corrie Ten Boom tells her story of speaking a message about forgiveness. After
her message a man walked up to her that she recognized. This man was a guard at the
internment camp that she and her sister were held at. The guard didnt remember her, but she
most definitely remembered him as the old selfish anger got stirred up. He asked her for
forgiveness for the acts he did to prisoners like her. Corrie stood there not having the will to
forgive him. She simply asked God for help then reached out and shook his hand. When she did
the anger flowed out of her, God filled her with love, and she was able to tell the man and really
meant it that she forgave him.
8

Reiteration: This morning weve looked at the four aspects of Christ-like anger, replacing
unbiblical thinking with forgiveness, and weve looked at what should come out of a Christians
mouth when he has chosen to forgive -- what he says should have age -- it should be appropriate,
gracious, and edifying, building up.
Action: If you have seen areas of deficiency in your life, why not ask God right now to forgive
you and to empower you to walk in the light of what He is showing you? Remember, we are
called to walk in righteousness and true holiness. When God makes stipulations for our conduct,
He always provides His grace and power to enable us to do His will. (A. Brown)
Appeal: My friends I ask that you would please bow your heads with me this morning and ask
God to help you apply these areas to your life.