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Kyle Risinger

Professor Jones
November 4, 2014
Communicating About Suicide
Before 2013, suicide had no effect on myself as a person whatsoever. Maybe it was due
to the fact that I didnt pay attention to it or its precursors. I didnt understand depression or the
feeling like there was no one there to help you. Maybe it was the fact that I hadnt been affected
by suicide. No one I knew had committed suicide. Sure, I knew people who died. One of the kids
I went to high school with fell off a cliff to his death. That afflicted my mind for a portion of
time, but I got over it. Everyone dies. Perhaps, it was his time. However, nothing could prepare
me for what happened in May of 2013:
I woke up on a Wednesday morning preparing for a long day of work. It was another hot
day. I opened up my computer to kill some time before my departure. Naturally, I opened
up to my favorite social networking site. I read some nonsense, probably looked at my
sports teams pages and then I saw what my friend posted: R.I.P. my favorite brother. I
will miss you! I read this and was taken aback. My first thought was Taylor. But, I also
was thinking that he wrote favorite brother. I knew that he had step-brothers. It was a
selfish thought to hope that it was one of them and not Taylor. My sister came into my
room and told me the truth. To be honest, I didnt even react. I just sat there. I didnt
know what to think. I remember bursting into tears that Saturday when I knew the funeral
was happening. I couldnt make it. My dad didnt want me driving eight hours to
Minnesota by myself. That whole week and many months after that, I didnt spend a day

without thinking about Taylor. I was just with him the November before it happened. We
were laughing, smoking cigars and cracking jokes. I couldnt believe he was gone. I was
finally affected by the horrid truth of suicide.
Thinking about it now as I suck down coffee in front of a computer screen, I realize that I
want to know more about suicide. I want to know what a suicidal person thinks about. I want to
find out what can be done to prevent suicide. I want to know what is being done to raise
awareness of the situation, and I want to know the communication that those who are
contemplating suicide have with others, if any. I saw Taylors mother two months after it
happened. We were celebrating the Fourth of July. She seemed fine at first, but that night, I saw a
grown woman sobbing in the dirt outside of a fire pit. I could not have felt worse for her. She had
lost her son. No one should lose their child. Shes the audience I want this paper to be angled
towards. I want to give her and others who have lost loved ones to suicide information on what
happened and why it happened. Hopefully, this information can be useful to them in that parents
can find out the reasons for suicide and the preventions for it. I want to discover what
communication they can use to talk to their loved ones who may be contemplating suicide.
Maybe, this information wont fill the void of losing someone, as well it shouldnt, but I want it
to raise awareness of this epidemic.
One thing to look at in regards to suicide is how most parents perceive it and how they
perceive depression. It is important that parents look at it the right way. They cant just shrug off
depression and tell their kid to get over it. Depression is deeper than just emotions. It affects
much more in a persons mind. Stanley (2005) explained a study on identifying risk behaviors.
Parents were asked whether they could identify any harbingers of depression or illness prior to or

only after the death of their child. About half of the parents (21) considered the signs as being
conspicuous only after the death. They did not consider them to be precursors to suicide when
the child was alive. Furthermore, fourteen parents had seen signs of depression or illness before
their childs death but did not connect them to suicide. Five parents explained precursors to
suicide like previous attempts while two parents described their children having made deliberate
preparations for death.
In an article written by Limtanakool (2005), Reese Butler, founder of the Kristin Brooks
Hope Center, said, Six years ago, 5,000 mental health care professionals were tested on their
ability to do basic risk assessment patient intake. Ninety percent of them failed. That is
abysmal. Yet another statistic that is quite disturbing and calls for more awareness. This article
by Limtanakool discusses a youth suicide prevention tour. The Mental Health Services
Administration statistics reveals that every 100 minutes, a teenager commits suicide. The tour
adhered to four topics, the topics being conscience, passion, talent and action. The president of
the National Mental Health Association stated that teenagers face obstacles daily and most of the
time, they dont have any way of dealing with them. The concert tour traveled to 35 cities across
the United States, raising awareness and education people about the prevalence of teen suicide.
I discovered a couple articles that discussed some thoughts or ideas that people
contemplating suicide feel and think before killing themselves or during depression. One article
discussed the fact that suicidal people perceive themselves as being burdens to those around
them (Hill & Pettit, 2014). These people commit suicide because they cannot deal with being a
problem to loved ones or friends. Most of the time, they are not perceived as a burden, but one is
so depressed, they cannot see past that notion. The article further discussed the matter by stating
that notes left by United States Air Force members revealed that 40.8 percent of those who

committed suicide had shown perceived budensomeness-related themes. The main point that the
article was trying to get at was the idea of being a burden to someone could be a mediator to risk
behaviors and suicide-related behaviors. The second article discussed personality factors that
contributed to suicide attempts. The article by Kumar, Rajmohan and Sushil (2013) started out
with a statistic stating that suicide is the third leading cause of death among people aged 15-34
years and one of the top ten causes of death in every country. They listed some psychological
factors that contributed to suicide such as distressing life events, personality, impulsivity and
violence of an individual.
When a person faces frustrations, he/she develops anxiety, depression, hopelessness,
worthlessness and shows suicidal behavior, (Kumar, et. al., 2013). It is important for these
individuals to be able to cope with these frustrations or they will attempt or commit suicide.
Reading a few more article thoroughly, I came across some discussions about family
communication and the effects they have on suicidal people and people with depression. One
article discussed the role of the family meal in assessing the likelihood of adolescent risk
behaviors (Goldfarb, et. al., 2014). The article stated that the less family meals an adolescent has,
the more risk behaviors that they will develop. This will then lead to the chances of depression,
suicidal thoughts and suicide. I feel like family meals can definitely prevent risk behaviors.
Another article discussed a study that suggests that children with parents who discourage
self-thinking and discovery and require conformity to parental ideals in communication are less
likely to develop psychological and social competence than those with parents who do not have a
conformity orientation (Miller & Day, 2002). Too much control from a parent could lead to a
lack of individuality and maturity in a child, thus leading to risk behaviors. This article helps
develop a line between maintaining communication and forcing too much communication.

Children and teenagers need their space. Forcing them to conform to parental ideals will not help
prevent suicide. If anything, it will encourage it.
There also needs to be a better knowledge of mental health professionals as noted in the
article by Limtanakool (2005). An article I read discussed suicide-prevention gatekeeper-training
in college settings (Dayton, et. al., 2012). The article reads that approximately 80 percent of
those college students that die by suicide are unknown to campus mental health professionals and
the vast majority (85 percent) of those contemplating suicide do not seek treatment. These
gatekeepers need to be aware of these statistics so they can have the knowledge to help people.
The article read that these gatekeepers do not have enough time to learn everything they need to
know because they are students themselves.
I thought of many different audiences that I could critically evaluate with the likes of
people who have lost others to suicide, people considering suicide and people unaffected by
suicide but want to know information about it. As I stated at the beginning of this paper, I chose
to angle my paper towards those who have lost others to suicide. The fact that I have seen people
dealing with it gave me no choice but to choose them as my audience. As I said before, I hope
some of the information I listed can be helpful in coping with the death of their loved ones.
My communication with this audience is critical. They are the ones most affected by the
topic. I cannot be too harsh in delivering information, and I cannot put the blame on them unless
it is rather obvious. They need information that will not hurt them anymore than the suicide
already has. I also have to take into account how long it has been since that person lost their
friend, son/daughter, husband, wife etc. I doubt that telling Taylors mother that communication
was key to prevent suicide would help her just two months after his death. But over a year later,

she has been on suicide walks to help raise awareness. Now, I think I can give her information on
what Taylor and others may have been thinking about and ways to get information out of those
who are considering suicide. Getting this information will have to be done delicately. One cannot
force a person with depression to divulge into everything that makes them depressed. One has to
communicate in bits and pieces.
One thing I can do to get his information out there rather than through a paper would be
to develop an awareness tour or walk or something. The walks that people do are very good for
raising awareness. I would stress that the people who have lost loved ones to suicide are not
alone. They need to know that. I know, through experiences, that when something bad happens to
a person, they feel like the only one experiencing it. They are not. Perhaps, I can get a
spokesperson or prominent figure who has experienced suicide to talk at this tour or walk. They
can help those who have lost loved ones relate and make them feel even less alone. These types
of things like tours, walks and spokespeople are public relation tools. I find them to be quite
effective, and I feel that they should work in raising awareness on suicide.
In regards to my research, I want my audience to know what is important. They can know
the facts, but they need to know what to make of them. In an article by Stanley (2005), it is clear
that there needs to be more information out there about depression and the actions of children
contemplating or preparing for suicide. Having half of the parents connecting their childs action
to suicide only after their deaths is a disturbing statistic. There needs to more awareness. If
children are feeling depressed, their parents need to communicate with them. They need to seek
help from outside sources to find out what is causing the depression.

Reading the article by Limtanakool (2005), people need to know the statistics about
suicide. I think that the statistic about a teen committing suicide every 100 minutes is a key
statistic in the need for awareness. The tour of 35 cities is good, but there needs to be more.
People can go on walks to raise money and awareness, they can have concerts, but they need to
know these statistics. They need to know what goes on in a teens head when they are
contemplating suicide. Also, the article that discussed those who are suicidal as feeling like a
burden is crucial to my point on increasing communication. Id like to know how many people
who consider themselves burdens actually talk about it. The article by Stanley (2005) discussed
that most parents in the study he looked at did not have any knowledge of suicidal precursor
prior to their childs death. They should have known. Communication with their child could have
saved his/her life.
This communication can be achieved through family meals. Risk behaviors that were
otherwise unknown may be discovered through discussion around the dinner table. These
behaviors can sometimes lead to suicidal thoughts as I stated, and family meals can get a child
talking and can get them to confide to their parents their concerns and how they are feeling. With
more discussion, there is a better understanding of what is going on, and this can lead to health
issues with depression being deleted or at least kept at bay.
The last item to evaluate about my research is the mental health professionals. They need
to know more information. Suicide cannot be overlooked. Depression is a disease and should not
be treated as a cold or the flu. The universities from an article (Dayton, et. al., 2012) I read need
to hire people who dedicate all their work time to preventing suicide and talking to students
contemplating it. Suicide is one of the most serious things in the world and that extra time to talk

to someone or even say hello could make a huge difference. Maybe, those gatekeepers from the
article need to be real mental health professionals and not students.
Some strategies that I would use to convey this information would be to use quotes,
anecdotes and statistics. I would include my own experiences with suicide as I did with my
earlier anecdote about my friend. People would see my paper, tours or walks as more credible
coming from someone who has been through at least a little bit of the topic. I believe statistics on
suicide help in the awareness aspect, so that is information I wish to convey to my audience.
Some key statistics that need to be made aware are the fact that every 100 minutes, a teenager
commits suicide (Limtanakool, 2005). As I said before, that is a statistic that should garner
everyones attention. That number needs to lower significantly, and it can only do so if people
are made aware of suicide. Through elements of my research, I can convey my information
effectively. The article about the family meal tells its readers that the more meals a child is
subject to, the less risk behaviors they will have. People need to know that. Just talking to
someone who is depressed can change their entire perspective.
My central message to my audience would be that communication is a crucial step in
understanding suicide and the thoughts and risk behaviors behind it. I want to stress that there is
never enough information to be learned about the situation or any situation for that matter. The
more information we know about suicide, the more people will be prepared to combat it and the
greater awareness it will have.
I believe the best way to communicate this information to people would be face to face
because suicide is not something we want to sweep under the rug or lose sight of. Pamphlets and
papers are good for an initial insight about the information, but people learn better when they

hear the words and communicate about their experiences. Awareness, I believe, is best gained
through communication.
In reflection, I have come to think, through my own thoughts and by researching the topic
that depression will never go away. Its hard to think that we will not be able to stop it altogether.
I have come to believe that despite depression always being there, it does not mean that we, as
people, should deflect it away and push it off as a minor issue. We should be out there fighting it
and raising awareness about it. I feel that everyone experiences depression even if it is a slight
sadness. I mean, everyone is going to lose someone in their life. They will feel sadness and grief
for a time, but it will eventually be subdued. Why should someone feel sadness for so long that
they have to take their own life and cause more sadness? No one should feel that pain.
Through my experience with suicide and my research, I have come to believe that it is a
huge issue. Many people deal with depression and that could lead to suicide. I think my
information and the actions I can take in making people aware of suicide can change the
landscape. Perhaps, it can get people the appropriate help they need. Perhaps, it can get the right
professionals out there to assist those with depression. It will take more than this paper to make a
difference, but just the thoughts that it provokes could lead to more thoughts. Expressing
thoughts out loud or on paper can go a long way.
In conclusion, I would like to maintain that communication is crucial to revealing the
things that bring about suicide. There needs to be a better awareness to this dilemma. I dont
know if I would do much differently with this assignment. I dont like to dwell on what I
couldve done. I already did it. Its over.

On that note, I could have started this paper earlier. Writing most of it on the Monday
before it was due was a bit of a reach and led to me spending six hours in the library, but I did
learn that my typing skills were still up to par. I could have also discussed some parents who
have lost others to suicide. Seeing their views and displaying it to my audience could have been
beneficial in understanding that we are not alone in this situation. A lot of people deal with it. I
also could have discussed how prominent figures deal with suicide like Joey Bada$$ on the death
of his friend, Capital STEEZ. I also could have discussed the death of Robin Williams who may
or may not be more known than Capital STEEZ. This could have further encouraged my idea
that we are not alone on the topic of suicide.
In all honesty, I think adding on all that information would lead to a paper just displaying
facts. I wanted to keep some emotion in my paper. That is why I am ending it with a tribute to
my friend, Taylor. I hope this paper will get out there somehow and show other people dealing
with the issues that you dealt with that they are not the only ones suffering and that there are
people out there who would be devastated by their loss. I know I was devastated by the death of
my friend, and I dont want anyone else to experience by that.

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