Running head: ADOLESCENCE

Adolescence: The Struggle of an only Child

Kyle Manikas
Wayne State University
Professor: Billy Blodgett

ADOLESCENCE

Introduction
This is a walkthrough of my adolescence years, given other requirements each section
could be its own book. By using the multidimensional approach I looked at my adolescence
though Biophysical Dimension (8-14), Psychological Dimension, (14-16) Social Dimension (1621). With adolescence also being a time of rapid growth and change in ones life I also broke it
down in three varying age groups. No one person can be put in a nice clean box, because we
change and develop at different ages and phases in ones life. With the biophysical and physical
changes and my social adjustments both over lapping and expanding my psychological
understanding of myself. I believe that this process will give you a better understanding of who I
am and who I am becoming still at age twenty-three

Biophysical Dimension
Puberty is identified by the combination of growth spurt, maturation of physiological
mechanisms, and the development of secondary characteristics, such as pubic hair and breasts,
(Ashford, 424, 2013) Puberty is always a tough time for children; I myself had trouble during my
pubescent times. I started puberty when I was around the age of eight years old, although that is
not considered the start of adolescence thats the age I began mine. By the age of nine I had a
full mustache, and began to feel strange tingling in my genitals when I would watch Oprah. I
began to omit body odor, an odor to this day I can not still describe. Prior to this age my
metabolism was great, I remember going to the doctors and listening to my mother being told if
your son comes in here underweight again were calling CPS for malnourishment. By no means
was I malnourished, I ate food like I was starving, my mom would often tell people that she
would feed me as if I was two people. As soon as puberty kicked in I began to gain weight and
fast.

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This was perfect because at this time I began playing tackle football, my mom had a
dream of me becoming a professional athlete. I played for the St Clair shore green hornets,
knowing nothing about the sport itself at all, at 87lbs I was put on the offensive line. Linemen are
usually heavier kids but something about my tenacity helped the coaches put me on the line. In
the league I was in you which was age from seven though nine 45-90 lbs. I was at a weight
where I was at risk of playing with older kids. So weight control became an issue and I forced
myself to eat less. Football helped me with my anger issues I was facing, I was being bullied at
school for my odor, and the fact I looked different then everyone else. The bullying was awful
often my fourth grade teacher would chime in with her own commentary of oh someone is
musty today, open a window. It was awful, among all this torture I was facing I managed to get
a girlfriend which at this age a girlfriend is nothing more than in name and nothing else but it
was meant something to me. We would hold hands and walk in the halls, and talk on the phone
till my bed time. I like her, and would even get the Oprah tingle I was talking about earlier in my
pants. My girlfriend happened to also have three other boyfriends and after finding this out I
called her a whore in which I was in trouble.
Being bullied continued over the next three years and finally I switched schools and
began going to LAnse Creuse Middle School Central. At this age I was thirteen, everyone there
seemed to be at the same stage as me and by now I was no longer an early bloomer but just like
the rest. I hit a growth spurt around this time which made me a perfect candidate for an offensive
line as well as defensive line at the school. I went from average to more so overweight my final
year as an up and coming freshmen I weighted 200lbs and I was 55.

Psychological Dimension

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One problem adolescence may face is low self-esteem, which is lowest in early
adolescence (Ashford, 448, 2013). My self-esteem at this point of my life was at an all-time
low. Going into high school as a freshman I was now a chubby kid and had few friends in my
inner circle. I struggled with the idea of what it meant to be a man, although my mother did her
best to try and mold me, she herself was not a man and did not know what I was going through. I
wanted to die; I felt no one could ever understand how much I hated myself. I began cutting
myself whenever I was at a low. According to the book approximately 15% of high school
adolescence engage in self-injury (Ashford, 448, 2013). I felt that the pain I was feeling in my
wrists would take away from the pain in my heart. Often I would sit in my room and stare at the
celling and wonder why am I even here. Finally after trying to overdose on Excedrin, my
mother took action. She had no idea this was going on considering she had to work two jobs to
help support me.
I just felt empty inside, I can best describe it as screaming when no one can here. Its like
calling out for help but having no one to help you. I was placed in therapy for several months. I
felt I did not need to be there. Me being the smart ass I tend to be, played games with the
therapist, I would get to a point where he would think we were going to have a break through
but never actually go to it. After around three months of this I finally let up and opened up. I
discovered my issues were deeper than just being bullied and made fun of. I needed a father
figure in my life, someone to do guy stuff with. There were no positive male influences in my
life; my father who left my mother when she was two months pregnant and was married and had
thirteen other kids to worry about. Then there was my aunts boyfriend who both abused and
would beat her until she could not move. Those were the kind of male influences I had in my life
and what I learned from them is that I never want to be anything like them no matter what. A few

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months later I began, wrestling to take up my time at home without my mom, and to stay in
shape for football. Between the weigh-in and the competition, usually-five hours, the wrestler
further engages in binge eating in an attempt to rehydrate. Weight-cutting and binge eating are
not restricted to international or collegiate competition, but are also practiced by young high
school wrestlers who are still maturing (Maurras). I fell in this category; I had a poor body
image and poor self-image. I looked at myself as just a nothing even after all the counseling I
received. Freshman year was a tough year; I started wrestling at my weight of 200lbs. By the
start of actual competitions I weigh in at 168lbs and was able to wrestle at the 170 weight class.
It was never pushed on us to lose the weight but I sure worked hard at it. I would practice in the
heated wrestling room with three hoodies on and two pair of sweat pants. Being in a team sport
helped me in my adolescence; in I began to increase my friends. I was referred to as Manikaz
because my first match I was disqualified for biting someone. Word spread quickly that I was
crazy and not someone to mess with or pick on.
The shape I was in and reputation I now had my self-esteem sky rocketed. I started to
think to myself you know life isnt that bad. My self-image changed as well I started to try and
dress with the trend. Peer pressure was big at this age, if u did not wear Hollister, Abercrombie,
or Aeropostale you were not in the popular group. I was doing my best to fit in and conform to
what was considered popular. My mom was struggling to pay bills, so designer clothes were not
an option. In todays world, adolescence juggles school, friends, boyfriends or girlfriends,
family and work. (Ashford, 475, 2013) So at the age of sixteen I got myself a job, and increased
my wardrobe, and was now I was ready to take on the world in style.
As I began to become more popular I became more eccentric and eclectic. People started
to begin to question my sexuality, mainly because all my clothes always matched from head to

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toe; I went from onto of the world back to a lower self-esteem. I struggled with the idea of being
homosexual in my mindset I felt that if someone calls me it enough I must be it. In my junior
year I again fell into a deep depression. I asked myself am I gay at this point I never had a
girlfriend and I was a junior in high school. I sat down with my mother to discuss this, she said to
me no son of mine is going to be gay, you owe me grand babies So support of my mother was
not there. I started becoming more perspicuous, I didnt want to be seen as gay, so I began sex
with any girl that would have me. To prove to not only myself but to others and my mom, who
now questioned my sexuality herself that I was not gay. The thought in her mind will always and
forever be there that I might be but I am by no means. I would have a guy friend stay the night
and she would stay up all night randomly checking us to make sure I was not fooling around. It is
sad that my own mother wouldnt accept me no matter who I am.

Social Dimension
This is where social learning theory comes in to the mix of things; this theory in essence
states that someone can learn from their observations of others. In high school peer relations are
important. I was now labeled as a typical jock but was on top of the world. LAnse Creuse high
school was a predominately white school. Rising through the ranks to be considered popular was
hard especially being a person of color. Often I was told well you dont count youre not even
really black I never looked at it that way and still dont to this day. I dont consider being black
as anything different than being white its an ethnicity not how you act. Often people consider
someone being black, sagging their pants, and speaking in Ebonics. To me that has nothing to do
with being black. I was raised by a white family and I know the difference between being
ignorant and being African American. I was the change that helped my family no longer be
racist. That whole experience alone was a tough one.

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Times were tough at the age of 18; I was one vote away from being on homecoming
court. An androgynous male adolescent is someone who is both assertive and sensitive to
others (Ashford, 463, 2013) Being raised by a women as helped me become more in touch with
my softer side. I can sometimes be considered as very sensitive, and I am not afraid to cry. So I
was often surrounded by women and had many friends that were girls. My high school
experience was like no other and one day I think I would like to write a book about it. I
graduated not with the best of grades but I made it. 71% of all high school dropouts come from
fatherless homes (fatherless generation). I beat the statistics and made it out of high school. As
the statics show it is hard for someone from a single parent household to graduate. As I graduated
I started coaching football, to me I felt that I would like to help mold and shape young minds. I
began mentoring five young men in the program, and helping them though their own life
experiences as I myself grew. They are now part of my extended family and I often talk to them
still as of this day.

Myself today
I would not change any of my life experiences, I know it has helped shaped the person I
am to this day. I think my struggles as a young adolescent are the reasons I am so cold when it
comes to bullys. To this day it gets my blood boiling when u sees someone being picked on. I
have never partaken in making fun of anyone and never will. I feel that we are all people and we
are all trying to make it in this world, we do not need someone else making it complicated.

Conclusion
My adolescence was an interesting one; I feel in this paper you learned so much about
me. In looking back I learned a lot more about myself, and up until this course I would have
never looked at my adolescence in this light. Reflecting on my own adolescence help me relate

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to the struggles that kids are facing with more technologies out there and social media. As a
mentor, a coach and fellow student people have an easier time talking to me. Parents have even
asked me to one on one mentor their children. As a social worker I would like to work in the
schools and keep bullying at a low, because in the end were all people.

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References
Ashford, J. B., & LeCroy, C. W. (2013). Human behavior in the social environment: a
multidimensional perspective (5th ed.). Australia: Brooks/Cole, Cengage Learning

Bulimic Behaviors Among wrestlers. (n.d.). Vanderbilt University. Retrieved November

7, 2013, from http://www.vanderbilt.edu/AnS/psychology

The Fatherless Generation. (n.d.). The Fatherless Generation. Retrieved November 7,

2013, from http://thefatherlessgeneration.wordpress.com