Caden Brown

Jolynne Berrett
English 1010

The Importance of Family

What has happened to these things we call family or marriage, in our country?
The importance of family is long forgotten by most of us in the hectic schedule of our
lives. So many people these days are choosing not to get married and start families.
This has a huge impact on our upcoming generation and our society. American
households have never been more diverse, more surprising, more baffling (Natalie
Angier, NY Times) In the past decade this thing we call family has dramatically been
changing. Half of all babies born to women under the age of 30 are now born outside of
marriage, and a big chunk of these births are unplanned. A lot of us don't truly
understand the consequences to these children when they grow up in broken homes
and relationships. Its very sad to me to see the statistics of how children will be when
they grow up living in these conditions. It brings up phycological issues and many more
problems.
The nuclear family has been considered the traditional family structure. It has
been around since 1950 after the cold war occurred, and that structure consists of a
mother, father, and children. But overtime this has become less prevalent and that
structure is starting to become less popular. We are seeing more and more single
parenting and many unplanned births. Studies have shown that without two equal

parental figures in the picture, it tends to cause problems for the development of the
children.
Children grow up watching parents, or partners or anybody that they come into
interaction with. Everything that they see or hear is perceived that thats the way it needs
to be done, making them grow up and act the same way to people, and how they
handle situations. So when they are watching fathers or moms being abusive or violent,
or non existent, there is a big chance thats how they will act when they are in that role.
Its the only way they know how to work, or comprehend things. In the long run it will
screw things up, and that will be passed down to their children. Also women these days
are seeing that there are only few good partners for them to marry, so theyre choosing
to do it alone, and take responsibility for both earning the majority of the income and
handling most if not all of the household chores while putting up with a lot of other
problems such as infidelity, substance abuse, or domestic violence. This means that a
large proportion of children are growing up without the kind of stable environment that
two parents provided in the past. A childs education starts at home. No improvement in
public policy can compete with what only families can provide, without a strong start in
life, children do not do well in school and typically never catch up to their
peers. (Carbone and Cahn)
Regardless of family structure, the quality of parenting is one of the best
predictors of children's emotional and social well-being. Not only do kids living without
fathers miss out on crucial growing and support, kids growing up without mothers is very
crucial also. Jenet Erickson, from the Public Disclosure, simply says, Men don't
mother. Boys from fatherless families are twice as likely to end up in prison by the time

they are 30 years old. Girls raised without their fathers are much more likely to engage
in sexual behavior and end up pregnant in their teens. They are six times more likely to
become pregnant! Which starts this cycle all over again, children growing up without
substantial parenting. Also, children who grow up without married mothers and fathers
are also more likely to experience depression, behavioral problems, and school
expulsion. Jenet Erickson. And sadly many of us that grow up with both mothers and
fathers, take for granted the simple things we are blessed with, such as simple skills like
communication, anger output, etc.
In a recent study, it shows that just simply sitting down and eating a meal with
your family together increases characteristics such as having a positive view of ones
future, being motivated and engaged in school, being committed to learning, and having
positive values and positive identity (Fulkerson, Neumark-Sztainer & Story, 2006)
Families who had five to seven family dinners per week were three times more likely to
report having family support, positive family communication, and parental involvement in
schools. Also, children who eat family meals together are more likely to have family
support, peer influences, and positive adult role models. Eating meals with family has
proven to be more healthy also, a study showed that families who eat together consume
0.8 more fruits and vegetables than families who ate separately.
Families make up some of the strongest relationships there are, and they also
prepare us on how to keep relationships strong. Without a good family structure, you
aren't taught the ability to keep relationships going. Families bring out the best and
worst of us. You are the product of your parents, who in turn, are the creation of their
respective parents. Therefore, the values and actions that you reveal to the world

outside identify you as a part of your family. Be it your day-to-day interactions, delivering
of lectures, the way you walk, the way you portray yourself, all are simple indications of
what culture, practices and customs you have embedded from your family members
and ancestors. And sadly a lot of kids are not getting these tips and encouragement
because the family structure is slowly diminishing, leaving many children confused
about life, and how to create relationships and many other simple tasks. I hope that over
the next couple years this will become very well known, and people will realize the
impact it has on others and fix it, and bring the family structure back to life.

Works Cited
Jenet Erickson. Men Dont Mother. Public Disclosure. 6 Oct. 2012. Web. http://
www.thepublicdiscourse.com/2012/10/6710/ 3 Dec. 2014

Anghela Z. Paredes, Eshani Persaud, and Karla P. Shelnutt.Raising Healthy

Children: The Importance of Family Meals Web. <http://edis.ifas.ufl.edu/fy1195.
University of Florida.
Lifestyle Lounge."Importance Of Family." 2014. The Iloveindia website. Dec 8
2014, http://lifestyle.iloveindia.com/lounge/importance-offamily-10723.html.
Natalie Angier. The Changing American Family NY Times. 25 Nov, 2013. Web
http://www.nytimes.com/2013/11/26/health/families.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0