Eugene Lee (Janelle)

Professor Frances McCue

Honors 205
October 22, 2014
Word Count: 1197
Refuse Change to Make a Change

Many times on Facebook have I seen women change their last names overnight,
following the day of their wedding. In every such occurrence, I was taken aback to see a stranger
on my newsfeed until I realized that she had just gotten married. This custom of women taking
their husbands surnames upon marriage has been one of the many societal norms that have gone
by generally unquestioned. I, however, have always wondered whether such a practice is
necessary or, even, appropriate. In this paper, I will argue that married women should keep their
maiden names.
To clarify, I am not positing that the United States government should pass any legalistic
document officially putting an end to the practice of female marital name change. Rather, I am
arguing for my claim in hope that more and more women would begin to see that it is in fact the
more reasonable and desirable choice to keep their maiden names, and would start to act upon
that realization. A womans maiden name, the surname that she has from birth until it is legally
changed to her husbands at marriage, is significant in that it represents a womans heritage and
family line. I believe that it is better for women to keep their names unchanged throughout their
lives because doing so establishes equality and self-respect.
Men and women are equal, so a woman should not be expected to do something that her
husband is not. The tradition of marital name change originates from a time when women were
considered property of their husbands and had no property rights themselves. Marriage for a
woman meant giving up her identity and merging her legal existence with her husbands.

Recently, however, people have begun to recognize that a woman retains her own separate
identity from her husband. After a long struggle for gender equality, the accomplishments of
which can be shown by the passage of the Nineteenth Amendment and the increasing number of
women in politics and in engineering, I am sure that most people would agree with me when I
say that men and women are in fact equal, and both genders should be treated the same without
discrimination. The principle of gender equality has arguably been well established by this point.
So, if it is trueor believed to be right by the majority of the human populationthat men and
women are equal and a woman has her own identity apart from her husband, than why is it that
society still expects women to change their names to match their husbands? Why has not the old
tradition based on the very belief that women are inferior to men been rooted out of
contemporary society? If modern America truly believes in equality among men and women,
then it would only make sense that its female citizens keep their maiden names in marriage.
Moreover, a womans last name is an essential part of her identity that she ought not to
relinquish. Identities matter, and names are powerful. The name we give something is a part of
how we make it real and give it meaning. A name is far more than just a word used to address a
person; a name bears a persons life story and reflects his or her sense of identity as an
individual. The cultural assumption that women will change their names upon marriage
diminishes the female genders sense of self worth. When women think of their names as
temporary or not really theirs, and when they see that a part of being a woman is incorporating
their identities into their husbands, they naturally, and often unknowingly, come to doubt and
deny the fact that their existence is valuable as it is and that as individuals they are already
whole. Therefore, a womans choice to keep her name is a form of self-respect. She is choosing
to recognize herself as an independent being who does not have to exist as someones wife. She

is choosing to respect all the meanings and associations that her name carries, including her
family history, the numerous accomplishments she has made under that name, and the people
who hold her name close to their hearts. Any person deserves respect from him or herself as well
as from the society he or she belongs in. A woman is rightly esteemed according to her worth
when she keeps a central part of her identity, her maiden name, thus maintaining a firm sense of
self.
A potential objection to my claim may be that the purpose of marital name change is to
represent the union between a husband and a wife, and that a woman who refuses to take her
husbands surname shows a lack of dedication to the marriage vow. In trying to show herself
respect and to assert her equal status, she would be disrespecting her husband and not showing
enough commitment to the relationship. This seems to be a rather benign statement in defense of
the custom of marital name change, and it is likely that many women continue the practice of
taking after the names of their husbands because of this underlying belief.
Nevertheless, the objection is fundamentally sexist. I do not question the idea of a
husband and a wife becoming one in marriage; but why must it be the wife that changes her
name to show respect for the union, while the husband keeps his name and seems to have no
such duties on his part? It is neither fair nor logical to assume that a dedicated wife will abandon
her maiden name while expecting nothing of the sort from a dedicated husband. A wifes love
for her husband and her wish to exist as an independent individual with her own identity are
completely different matters. Her devotion should be manifested in the forms of self-sacrifice,
patience, and faithfulness, not her willingness to abandon her family name. Therefore, the
statement that women who choose to keep their maiden names are undedicated to their marriage
fails to have any serious force against my argument.

This is an era of equality and individualism, when all sorts of unorthodox ideas are
brought forth and actions are taken against tradition and convention. Equality across genders,
social classes, and races is being advocated for and has largely been accomplished. The
individual is viewed as a sovereign entity with certain unalienable rights, and the interests and
worth of the individual is emphasized over collective control. In such an era, with all sorts of
liberal advancements, how is it not baffling that the outdated practice of marital name change is
still prevalent? How is it not being more largely recognized that the fair treatment and respect
that women deserve are being taken away by societys expectation of them to take their
husbands names upon marriage? Considering these, I believe the only sensible choice for
women is to keep their family names that have identified them since their birth. Such a decision
would simply be another step toward the egalitarian and free society that we all strive to attain.