Crisis of Identity,

What spark this writing was that a dear Women of God (Apostle Lee Ann Marino) ask me to send her
some information about me, such as ministry title, whats the name of the ministry, and whats it about.
I had no problem answer the last two questions, however the first question I was stuck, not sure,
debating, questing for the 1000th time. Sonia are you having an Crisis of Identity? What does that mean
Crisis of Identity (a period of uncertainty and confusion in which a person's sense of identity becomes
insecure, typically due to a change in their expected aims or role in society).
Back in the late 1990s I was just learning that God could speak and do other things. At that time, being a
Prophet was the hottest call and everyone was a prophet. I was learning the voice of God, casting out
devils, prophecy, speaking in tongues and you know the rest. I was walking from my den to the kitchen;
in between was my living room, I heard a voice say to me, today I call you my Apostle. First, I did not
know or cared anything about being Apostle, and what I heard they were killed beat, and not like very
much, so who wanted to do that. I want to be the fabulous, dynamic, awesome and great prophet to the
world, casting every devil out of people, the area and regions, laying hands on the sick and seeing them
recover, now.
As I walk through the first time, I hear this voice say, Now I call you my Apostle. I have to remind you
again the hottest gift was the prophet. I heard and didnt think anything of it, I was the prophet and
confidence. As I walked back to the den from the kitchen, I heard the same words again. My reply was
the devil is a liar. The third time as I went back to the kitchen and in the living room for the third time I
heard the same voice say it again, Now I call you my Apostle. This time I stopped in the middle of the
living room this was all within 30 minutes and said Yes Lord. He said to me, however that does not
mean you go out and start calling yourself that, getting business cards and thinking more highly of
yourself. He said, I will let you know when it is time. People will begin to call you that unexpectedly,
and your rule and realm of authority will increase and the persecutions. Of courses, I did not say
anything to anyone for almost 10 years and I did tell my bff, and until today.
First, who would believe me, second who would believe me, third I did not believe it. I was confident in
being the prophet. They begin to call me Hotsauce because I was bold. I would prophecy anywhere and
to anyone, cast out devils, and lay hands. As life went on, I forgot all about this moment with God. Just
to note I believe my living room is a portal, I have had great visitations by angels, fireballs being thrown
at my belly, fire, and of course HIS PRESENCES. However, I have had people of God tell me who I am and
it caused such great confusion in my life, trying to wear someone elses amour.
So here we are in 2014 having this call confirmed by leaders who I have meet, telling me if I dont
believe how can you walk in it. Crisis of Identity! Many of you are having the same thing called Crisis of
Identity. I just had an Apostolic/Prophetic Gathering and do you know one of the main things that
people were ministered to, knowing who you are in Christ Jesus. Now some people will not agree with
you, however it is incumbent upon you to believe.
Many people in the bible had Crisis of Identity. Just look at just think about the 12 disciples. Apostle
Paul, just a couple of months ago he was killing the same people that now has become a Christian.
Moses Crisis of Identity, John The Baptist Crisis of Identity, Peter Crisis of Identity, Elijah Crisis of
Identity, Jeremiah Crisis of Identity, Joshua Crisis of Identity, Gideon Crisis of Identity, You Crisis of
Identity, Me Crisis of Identity.
Jesus said, Jeremiah 1:5 I knew you before I formed you in your mothers womb. Before you were
born I set you apart and appointed you as my prophet to the nations. Isaiah 44:2, 2 Thus says the
Lord, Who made you and formed you from the womb, Who will help you: Fear not, O Jacob, My servant,
and you Jeshurun [the upright oneapplied to Israel as a type of the Messiah], whom I have chosen.
John 15: 16 You didnt choose me. I chose you. I appointed you to go and produce lasting fruit, so that
the Father will give you whatever you ask for, using my name. Psalm 139:13 says, For you formed my
inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb.
Someone wise said to me, most of us are not walking in the gifting HE has called us to walk. Second
Peter 1 10says, Wherefore the rather, brethren, give diligence to make your calling and election sure:
for if ye do these things, ye shall never fall: Another wise person said that usually the calling you are
called to you have the most difficult saying, or believing until you are affirmed in it. Other words until
other people start embracing it.
Listen, you will never look, operate, or talk like anyone. So do not compare yourself to them. Now we all
should be speaking the same language, which is Jesus Christ. I have a sense of humor, I flow different
from other leaders I gleam from, I sound different, I hear God different, and I read the word the way my
gifts operate. For example, when I read the word, I see strategies, deliverance, wisdom, God has me to
focus on words and why did I say that, there, history, boldness, authority, compassion, I see the rebel
and warrior Christ, power and HIS Love.
Here is what I am saying (you) have to believe that you are what HE calls you. He being Christ will always
confirm HIS word. Most of us were walking in our calling with even knowing it. Philippians 1:6 says,
Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the
day of Jesus Christ:. Many people will uses you and your gift, many will reject you and many will hurt
you, but (I love that word in when HE says it) there are more that will celebrate you and love, honor the
gift and call thats in you.
For years and sometime even today, I have a Crisis of Identity. The unique thing is that God will send
strangers and Christians to me and say Apostle. The one reason I had convince myself not to call myself
that is because everyone has the title, two I dont operate like they do and surely I dont sound like
anyone them. However, praise God I didnt and praise God you dont. Now Im not saying it is ok to
error. However, submit to one another, humble yourself, be quit to forgive and your fruit will grow and
remain. And, they will know you by the fruit that you bear or produce. Read 3rd John 1 a great story
about Crisis of Identity.
So today, I speak to your Crisis of Identity and say it is over. YOU ARE WHO GOD SAYS YOU ARE.
Ephesians 2:10 For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared
beforehand so that we would walk in them. Joshua 1:9 says, Have not I commanded thee? Be strong
and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed, for the Lord thy God is with thee
whithersoever thou goest.