Documenti di Didattica
Documenti di Professioni
Documenti di Cultura
WOMAN’S ERA
PLAYING THE
SUBTLE GAME
OF ISOLATION
WISELY
RECOGNISING
CERVIX CANCER
WHY NOT
ADD TO YOUR
HUSBAND’S
LONGEVITY
MEASURE YOUR
IGNORANCE
ABOUT
SKIN AILMENT
HOW TO
WALK HEALTHY
MARCH (FIRST) 2009
READ
STEPS RELEVANT
ABOUT YOUR
LOVE-LIFE
MAKING
HOT MOVES
LIKE MEN DO!
3 GREAT
SHORT STORIES
MARCH (FIRST) 2009
Vol 36, Issue No. 846
CONTENTS
BUILDS HAPPY HOMES
Founder: Vishwa Nath
72
84
BOMBAY FILMDOM
8
ARE YOU KILLING
22
BODY POWER – WE
SEXCITING TIPS TO
MAKE HIM GO CRAZY
Amit Wadhwa
YOUR HUSBAND?
Dr S. N. Khosla
ARE WHAT WE EAT
Aruna Anand 76
32 REMOVING FACIAL
WRINKLES
Anil Merani
41 DISRUPTED BRAIN
CIRCUITS IN DEPRESSED
PEOPLE SMART TIPS TO WORK
Dr Kiran Bala WONDERS WITH
YOUR BREASTS
75 ICE YOUR FACE
Vikas Kumar Jain 26 Dr Parveen Parkash
ARTICLES REJUVENATE
YOUR SEX LIFE
Aruna Anand
12 WOMEN WILL RULE 98 THE MAESTRO OF
THE WORLD
Suman Bajpai
MOUNTAINSCAPES
Puja Sharma
COOKERY
92 ABSOLUTE 48 SWEET RELISH
NARRATIVE THROUGH AN ARTIST OF 50 FOOD FOR FESTIVITY
FACELESS DIMENSIONS PASSION ● Corn Kish each of
in this way
or serve
Prepare
dates
the stuffed all the dates
silver warq.and serve as a
as part
with
starter
of the many
festivity
for Holi.
desserts
R
● Stuffed Dates FOOD FO DEEP FRIE
D
CAKES
WHEATS:
THE AMALGAMATION
INGREDIENTlour – atta
Cakes
We bring For the
dal:
dal contin uously atta without forming ajwain seeds, r. Add
to the
h 1 cup thuvar mixes into
the is thick to splutte serve with the
recipes whic
● FISH IN
pamper 2 green rotis and
desserts to during AND
half inch for 10-12
salt to taste to at least
MUSTARD T
a this aside a cutter
ts METHOD tbsp of ghee
in Leave Then with
your gues fry minutes to set. round portions
.
COCONU
on. Heat 1 lour and for
e seas the wheatf light cut it into small round katorie
the festiv Corn kish
DATES kadhai. Addlow fire till it turns use a Heat
STUFFED MILK
on Add a You can r cakes.
colour .
Coconut Milk
Ghosh. the atta cut circula fry
By Roma low heat brown in e to stir this too to for deep frying and a
and on S:
golden
oil and continu up oil or ghee a few at DIENTS: any other fish
in the spices the corn, and use on low fire
to cook a INGREDIENTseedless dates little more
on low fire a little at a these cakes on top on
low INGRE rahu or
contin ue back of 6-8 pieces
H whole and cook Fry till brown
r
CORN KIS
with the continue to 12-15 adding in cakes with 1 tsp haldi powde the
mashi ng you at For the stuffin
g: all the gheeatta is a nice golden5-6 time. these wheat is deep frying
spoon as heat for fire. Serve preparation d mustard oil for
S: wooden over low a 1 cup sugar syrup time till the r pan heat dal. The
In anothe the lukewarm thuvar ki be enjoye
INGREDIENT cook. Cook adding ghee colour.
●
niblets 2 tsp pistach nuts water. Add fried atta
a rather heavy . to taste
3 cups corn least 8-10 cups of the festiva l season
dal in salt :
1/ cup ghee powder little at a
time. paranthans 2 tbsp
cashew
water slowly
into during the dal: Soak the the gravy
2 masala cut the of : wheat cakes For the minutes. Drain out For mustard
1 tsp garam dana powder To serve: Place a portion To serve for decoration Deep fried English
s. water for
15 of ghee 2 tbsp green chillies
FICTION
annar triangle on these warq 1 tbsp
1/ tsp into red corn as silver Heat and 2-3 slit
2 powder the prepa and serve all the water. pressure cooker chilli sauce t milk
1/ tsp jeera and
2
chilli powde
r triangles METHOD the cashe ws in a pan
or a . Add 2 2 tsp coconu
paranthan . for one minuteand salt 3 tbsp thick
Decorated
1/ tsp red small pieces
●
. Break the dal :
2
a starter nuts into and add the fry
cups of
water
the For garnishing
salt to taste pistachio and a half and cook pistachio
nuts
Stuffed dates
sugar syrup nut pieces. powder . You cherries and
To serve
: or jeera Heat the and haldi
r paranthans and cashewkeep stirring but not mushy want
pistachio dal till tender water if you METHOD fish and sprinkl
e salt
2 Malaba low fire and begins to
paranthans Cook on can add
more . If you are Clean the t of the
the syrup fruits get ency thinner the the amoun
add so that dry the consist water then bring to and half aside
METHOD ml of water and is and the r and keep
Strawberries
thicke n syrup. Once adding more allow it ic powde
Boil 350 Once the water the sugar room boil and s. turmer
coated in is dry cool it to
53
into dal to a a further 2 minute
salt to taste.the corn niblets mixture as a filling for
corn the to use it
place a simmer
boiling dropwater and allow temperature 2009
s. Carefully March (First)
the boiling in it for 2-3 minute for the dates. filling in the centre Woman’s
Era ●
r water. this the
to simme portion of
all the excess ck from whereWrap
Sweet Rajasthani
Drain out of ghee in a non-sti of the dates
●
d.
Heat 2 tbsp Fry the corn niblets been remove
seeds have
pan or a
tava. doing so
s and while that
for 2 minute g the corn so
Mix (First) 2009
keep mashin coarsely.
crushed Era ● March
TUG OF
these get Woman’s
Kachorie 52
30 MUSINGS/MEMORIES A DEPICTION
OF SENSITIVITY
BABY CLUB
CROSSWORD
AS YOU SAY
80
NATURALLY BEAUTIFUL!
MY FAMILY,
MY FRIENDS AND ME...
MONEY MATTERS
CLASSIFIEDS
62
FEMININE, URBANE & 46 READERS’
CLASSY! BEJEWELLED BEAUTY
CONTESTS
FEATURES 42
FILL UP THE
CROSSWORD
61 BEAUTY QUERIES 74 YOUR BODY AND WIN RS 15,000
COIFFURE WITH EVERY FORTNIGHT
71 CHILD CHALLENGES A CLASS
101 PERSONAL PROBLEMS
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SKIN SO SOFT! Remedies to beat your bleach problems...
How can I remove hair from I have brown pigmentation When I apply bleach on my
inside skin without getting any marks on my cheeks and nose. face, my eyes would start watering
pain? Please suggest a quick and easy after a couple of minutes and turn
Facial skin is very sensitive. If the remedy to solve my problem. red. Also, irritation and rashes
degree of pain is the clinching factor You can apply lime to the affected develop on my skin?
in your choice of a hair removal area at night once in a while and You should have gone for a patch
method then bleaching is the most wash off in the morning. Bleaching test on a small part of your hand
suitable option for lightening facial the affected area once a month will before you apply on your whole body.
hair and works best on short, fine and lighten it too. Wait for 24 hours to see if you have
dark hair. no irritation or rashes. If the same
Which bleach is the best one develop, you should stay away from
I have dark skin and dark without much side effects? Is that bleach cream.
hair on my face. I have tried there a different bleach for arms
bleaching but it contrasts with my and neck or the face bleach can be How often should I bleach my
dark skin and gives a very ugly used for the same? face?
appearance? Mild cream bleach with natural You should bleach once a month,
Read the instructions on the extract is certainly the best. Jolen is otherwise the chemicals in the bleach
package carefully. Mix in the powder an international brand and contains can roughen our skin over the period
and cream in right proportion and natural extracts, so no worries of side of time. Always apply a moisturiser
apply on the hair for 10 to 15 minutes effects! Yes, you can use the face after bleaching and never go out
only. bleach for arms and neck as well. without applying sunscreen.
EDITORIAL
WOMEN VICTIMISING WOMEN CHEERS FOR INDIAN EMPLOYEES
N P
ews of arrest of a notorious lady named Sonu resently, the entire world is reeling under
Punjaban has been hitting the headlines for widespread recession and something called
quite some months now. Media, especially the financial meltdown in economic jargon. Almost
newspapers, are publishing the developments everyday, news of some company winding up its
regarding her case after adding much spice to the real business or laying off jobs in its drive to downsizing is
matter. Arrested last November from a posh south hitting the headlines. Nobody in the market is sure that
Delhi locality, the lady in question originally hails from his/her job will be safe tomorrow. So everybody is
Punjab and had been charge-sheeted for luring young happy with what he or she has in hand and, for the time
innocent girls into the much despised trade. being, wants to retain it at any cost.
According to the police sources, Sonu had illicit Amid such disappointing and gloomy scenario,
connection with a number of men and, surprisingly, market experts predict that the employees in India
whichever men established intimacy with her had fallen would enjoy maximum hike in their salaries – up to 8.2
to police bullets some months later. How Sonu herself per cent – in the year 2009. Their prediction is based on
got sucked in crime world is another story. But she has the report of a survey conducted by Hewitt, an
won undisputed title of ‘the Queen of Call girls’ and international consultancy firm on human resources
presently she is under judicial arrest. development.
Since long, law enforcement agencies have Although this incremental percentage
been expressing concern on the increasing is slightly less than the previous year
incidents of human trafficking, especially the level of 13.3 per cent, yet it will be much
cases involving disappearance of young girls higher in comparison to salary hikes at
and women from comparatively poorer states global level including Asia-Pacific region.
of India. Recently, the United Nations has The survey is based on the responses
released a Global Report on human trafficking. received from 480 companies active in
The report is based on the data collected different sectors and it also reveals that
from 155 countries including India. It reveals a the rate of salary increment may fall
startling fact, which is so far unheard of, that during few months to come. But then it
now even the womenfolk are running the will correct itself.
human trafficking rackets. Their networks have Experts maintain that the widespread
spread to international levels. Being women is recession has hit the global economy
a plus point for such woman, as everybody believes a hard; especially the nations dependent on the US are
woman easily. feeling the brunt more than other countries. But even
What is more stunning is that most of the women then, economies like India and China are growing with
indulged in this crime, were once themselves victims of more than seven per cent rate. Recently, in the interim
some kind of atrocities. In fact, they are being misused budget also, caretaker finance minister Pranab
by influential men, who remain in the background and Mukherjee has talked about achieving around seven per
operate the entire ‘business’. cent growth rate.
It is a well-known fact that sex is the main motive Last year, the Central Government had implemented
behind human trafficking. Incidents exposed so far 6th Pay Commission report and increased the salaries
reveal that women gangs are active in the country, of its employees exuberantly. Government’s decision
which lure a large number of young girls and poor was followed by an unprecedented price rise and rate of
women from Bihar, Jharkhand, Orissa, Chhattisgarh and inflation broke all previous records. But all the hue and
Northeastern states and bring them in the capital for cry of the commoners fell on deaf ears, as the
supplying to rich men for satiating their hunger for sex. government got busy with manipulating data.
A detailed statistics reveals a large-scale failure of During the winter, when prices of vegetables fell,
law-enforcing and justice-delivering machineries so far. inflation rate also dived to record low, thereby, giving
Everyday, news of raping and molestation appear in the government an opportunity to pat its own back.
newspapers prominently. But how many of the culprits Now, when general elections are round the corner,
are booked and convicted by the courts is a subject of report of maximum salary hike has come like a breather
concern. In the final analysis, it is the male-dominated for the public, which may once again put its faith in the
society which is responsible for this sorry state of government. After all, it is the hope that keeps
affairs. everything running. write to: letters@womansera.com We
M
and it is primarily a matter observations about the lifeline immunity confers on them a definite
of mutual destiny. amongst men and women? advantage over the males.
Marriage is a sacred union According to Dr David Patts, “The Women differ in a number of
between a man and a male seems to be less fitted to deal ways, because of chromosomal
woman and it entails in with survival under adverse circum- differences, lowered body metabo -
both the partners to look stances.” In the USA, women lism and bodily functions (like
after the welfare of each outnumber men at all ages and in an menstruation, pregnancy, lactation)
other. The sanctity of elderly age group, for every 1,000 and these influence to a great extent
marriage and the home men there are 1,276 women. The their whole attitude towards life. As
has to be upheld by both life result – widows outnumber widowers compared to men, women are
partners. John Gay wrote: 3 to 1. So what is all this about? supposed to have a more living
If the heart of a man is depressed In a majority of living species, the attitude, compassion and sympa -
with care. female (despite all notions) is the thetic outlook while men are always
The mist is dispelled when a stronger sex and outlives the male. under great pressure to climb up the
woman appears. Is it that nature has endowed ladder and most of the time are under
females with some natural resistance stress and so are often fretful and
This aptly summarises the whole or are there some other factors which restless. Women can express their
philosophy of a man-woman relation- play an important role? Traditionally, emotions while men have to
ship. But if man is the provider of the males were indoctrinated to protect suppress them most of the time since
family, then it is the lady of the house females. But this is different it is not manly to cry.
who plays a major part in maintaining presently, now women have to play a Treat your husband with an
the health of the family and the bread different role and act as protectors of attitude of understanding. Do not
winner. the family. Women, in their younger become complacent. Be attentive to
age and prime of life because of their each other’s emotional needs. Be a
ARE YOU hormonal influences, are more part of his worries and emotional ups
and downs. When you have argu -
KILLING YOUR
ments, the wife can make her point
without hurting the husband’s
feelings. Forget the fact that you
have to be a winner. All problems
and fights can be solved amicably in
HUSBAND
a family, nobody is the winner. All
have to live and love each other, the
wife should try to boost her man’s
ego. And it does not cost much, does
it?
How to help your All this implies a great
responsibility on the young brides,
husband live longer. wives and mothers. Small fights,
pinpricks in daily life, can lead to
By Dr S. N. Khosla nothing but strain on the body, with
fatal results. Have you, madam, at
any time, asked yourself this
question, “Am I killing my man in my
life?”
Some may laugh it off. No woman
in her senses can kill the most
precious person in her life – the man
(husband, father, son). Let us look at
this paradox:
WOMEN WILL
RULE THE WORLD enuka Chowdhury, Union and duly acclaimed as “firebrand” for
R
Minister of State (Independent her candid nature, she is a versatile
Charge), Women & Child conversationalist, and has a number
Development, belongs to of literary, artistic and scientific
Indian National Congress accomplishments to her credit. She
Party and is one of the most has enthusiastically associated
renowned politicians in India herself with various social and
today. A postgraduate in cultural organisations and has been
industrial psychology, she contributing zealously to the field of
took up politics and social women and child development and
work as her profession and began welfare.
her active political career in 1980s. Renuka Chowdhury has special
She has been the Rajya Sabha interests in art collection. Reading,
member twice. She was elected to gardening and music are her
13th Lok Sabha in 1999 and held a favourite pastimes. She has visited a
number of significant positions like: number of countries like Canada,
Member, Rajya Sabha (two terms) China, Denmark, France, Germany,
Chief Whip, Telugu Desam Switzerland, UAE, UK, USA and
Parliamentary Party, Rajya Sabha former USSR. She loves reading
(1986-98); Union Minister of State, Woman’s Era. She feels it is a best
Health and Family Welfare (1997-98); gift to give.
Member, Committee on Finance When she first entered Parliament
(1999-2000) and Member, as a young Rajya Sabha MP, she
Committee on the Empowerment of was hailed as the real-life Rajni, after
Women (2000-2001). a popular TV character who took up
Apart from being politically active cudgels for the underdog. With
7 Mutton:
● The nutrients: Mutton contains
proteins vitamins and iron.
● How much: Not more than
three times a week.
5 Eggs:
● The Nutrients: Both portions of
egg contain different elements. Egg 8 Citrus Fruits:
● What are they good for:
yolk has fat protein, Vitamins A, B, Vitamin C safeguards body from
D, E and K, iron. While egg-white infection and helps in repairing skin if
contains protein and some minerals. there is any cut or a bruise and
● What are they good for: wounds.
Maintain overall a healthy body. ● The nutrients: Citrus fruits like servings a day are required. It can
● How much: 3 eggs per week. lemon, orange, sweet lemon, etc. be 125 grams of cooked rice or forty
grams of brown bread.
US Nikkitasha
Marwaha (C) is
crowned Queen
during the 18th Miss
India Worldwide
2009 Beauty
Pageant in Durban.
25 girls from all over
the world
participated in the
annual event. She
was crowned by
2008 winner
Shagun Sarabhai
from India.
Models display
Changing style
THE MENACE OF
O
females, cervix cancer has
assumed menacing
proportions and it is said
to be the commonest form
of cancer of the genitalia
in females. More and more
new cases of the disease
are being seen now. An
WHO estimate puts about
75,000 deaths in women annually
from the disease. Worldwide, cervix
cancer is the second most common
form of cancer in women next to
cancer of the breast.
What is cervix cancer? It is a
malady which arises from the lining
over the lip of the neck (cervix) of the
womb (uterus) and may remain
confined to that part most of the time.
The changes that the diseases
causes may not be noticed for a long
time, the sufferer being not aware of
it. And this is the most dangerous
part as the disease lies dormant for a
long time and by the time the disease
is noticed it may be too late.
When the disease causes
them where they got them. The man gave Rs 100 thinking that the balance
said that they had bought them from money would come back.
Akkamma of their lane. He also Akkamma went to the market and
added that there were many dresses came back with two bags full of
for sale and the poor people like them vegetables. She kept one bag near the
Clothes merchant were pouring into her hut. My wife door and gave the other to my wife.
In the eighties there was dearth of looked at my face and I looked at hers. My wife set her eyes on the bag at
maids at Mettur Dam. So we had Remembering the good lesson taught the door. Akkamma smiled and said,
been forced to shake our heads for by Akkamma, nowadays we give used “It is for me, madam. Your vegetable
everything that our maid Akkamma clothes to needy people only. cost Rs 50 and mine Rs 50. The
asked for, so that she may not move – S. Palanisamy, Madurai whole money you gave has been
to other homes. Once, she asked my spent.”
wife, “Madam, many of your used Coolie for extra work My wife’s face reddened. She said
saris are lying idle in your almirahs. In the eighties there was a heavy sharply, “Akkamma, if you want
Why don’t you give those faded ones shortage of maids at Mettur Dam. So, vegetables for your home you would
to me?” in order to keep their maids at their have bought it with your own money
Pitying her, my wife gave all her homes all feared to give extra work to but not with mine.”
faded saris to Akkamma for her use. their maids. But unfortunately my wife Akkamma coolly said, “Yes,
Akkamma requested for my used gave an additional job to our maid madam, I bought them with my
pants and shirts too for use by her Akkamma. money only. The coolie charges for
husband. Retaining a few new ones One day my wife felt a severe leg my today’s market work is Rs 50,
my wife gave all mine to her. pain. So she asked Akkamma to go to madam.” My wife and myself were
Three days later, when my wife the market and get some vegetables. stunned. From that day onwards
and I went to the temple, we saw a She gave her Rs 50. But Akkamma whenever we see vegetables we
man in my clothes. His wife too wore said it was not enough and demanded remember Akkamma.
my wife’s sari. Shocked, we asked Rs 100. Without argument my wife – S. Palanisamy, Madurai.
M
By Anil Merani 30 are worried about the and Restylane. But many people
growing wrinkles and have questioned the safety of
frown marks on their artificial injections. Also, you have to
faces. This is a normal keep taking fresh doses since the
ageing process, as years effects start to wear away once the
pass by the skin's natural chemical gets absorbed in the blood-
elasticity starts to go stream. Another common problem
away. This results in the with chemical fillers is that the skin
facial muscles getting starts to look plastic after repeated
loose. Earlier, the only solution was intakes.
Corporate Mothers
A high-salaried pro’s chat with a self-made housewife
is an eye-opener. By Amandeep
I
feel really scared at the thought of quitting my as educated as Satish and earning equally well.
highly paid corporate job. To quit the job Then why should I be the one chosen for this job?
would mean staying at home, minding the Why can’t we share this too, just like we share our
house and looking after my son. I don’t household expenses? It’s so unfair.
particularly like that format. Also, notice that My employers are already throwing hints about
my offspring is in singular. It’s because I find my rapidly depleting earned leave. I am the only
managing one possible and two, unthinkable. one at work who does not have a mother or a
Rohan, my son, goes to a school-cum-day care mother-in-law staying with me. Really, life is so much
centre in the vicinity. He leaves at 8 with my easier for a working mother with some support
husband and I pick him up on my way back from system. But I am determined to make the best of my
work about 7. Now, I say about seven because the situation and so what if all my leave gets spent
day care timings are until 7.30, but invariably I am taking care of Rohan. I will apply for unpaid leave,
late, and keep getting calls from the next. The only problem is that it reflects
supervisor there. In fact, I can visualise her badly on me, as if I am not serious about
right now, arms akimbo, brows raised, This only my work.
herding my son out of the door, strengthens my I did take Rohan to the specialist to find
exasperation written all over her face. argument that out the cause of his frequent bad spells. It
I do believe that day care is a much children are seems that children who go to childcares
better arrangement than leaving a child much better off centres often suffer from multiple infections.
alone with a maid, at home. Just last at day care Now that is the only downside of a
week, our neighbour’s maid absconded centres as childcare centre, as far as I can think.
and no one showed up to pick up their 5- regards their My mother is horrified by the way I am
year-old at the bus stop in the afternoon. safety, as I bringing up Rohan. According to her, she
The child went over to a friend’s house have repeatedly should never have sent me to ‘that MBA
and spent the remainder of the day there. course’ as I seem to have changed
pointed out to completely after that. She never thought I
Late in the evening when his friend’s
mother requested him to leave, did it come my husband, would ever send Rohan to a childcare
to light that the maid was missing and the Satish. centre and continue working.
house, locked. After that, there were
A
frantic phone calls to his parents, the police, etc. ren’t all mothers just the same? What about my
Our neighbours have been quick to put this happiness? No one seems to care about that.
incident behind them and they have brought in a Why should I sacrifice my life and become a
new maid. Life goes on just as usual for them, I housewife just like her? I have seen the look in
suppose. women’s eyes when they discover that I hold a high-
This only strengthens my argument that children profile job. Of course, my mother just doesn’t get it.
are much better off at day care centres as regards The thrill of getting ready in the morning, the clothes
their safety, as I have repeatedly pointed out to my and once at office — the work, the meetings, closing
husband, Satish. deals worth billions of dollars — it makes me feel so
I hate the days when Rohan falls ill. It’s as if his important and useful.
well-being is entirely my responsibility. After all, I am One winter morning, as I was returning from a
I
couldn’t help marvelling at the serene interiors of not put others in charge of my life.”
her house. Creamy whites and neutrals accented
with lush green plants instantly soothed my mind. Herding my son out
With my feet curled under my thighs, I settled down of the door,
on the sofa. exasperation written
all over her face. I do
Sandhya smiled at me. “Let’s talk first and then I’ll
believe that day care
make the tea. If that’s okay with you.” is a much better
“Yes, of course.” I really needed to hear arrangement than
Sandhya’s perspective on life, work, etc. “You leaving a child alone
know, you are the only person I’ve met so far who is with a maid, at home.
peaceful about staying at home. Generally, the
others look to be a pretty unhappy lot.”
“You’re right,” Sandhya wore a serious look on
her face. “I too have been in the same
place as them. Now I am comfortable
being anywhere, doing anything. I
have really stopped planning my days,
my life. I take each day, at a time. I
don’t know where I will be 5 years from
now but I am comfortable with that
knowledge. Does this sound really vague
to you?”
“Not at all. I think the older
generation like our mothers and
grandmothers lived like that too,” I
said.
“I quit work when I heard that I was
pregnant. We were in Mumbai and it
was a new experience to be at home,
alone, until my husband returned in
the evening. It was very hard. I
didn’t have any friends too, but in a
few months I managed to find my
rhythm. I mostly spent time reading
and walking,” Sandhya had a
faraway look in her eyes.
“And you have been home ever since?” I asked. I just need to find something that interests me and
“Oh no. I tried all sorts of things. Teaching, allows me to channelise my energy.”
holding tuition classes at home and what not. But “But don’t you feel cheated? After having studied
none of these was as appealing as the job that I had so hard and worked for so many years. I don’t think
quit — that of a financial analyst. Somehow, that I can ever do what you did. There’s no way I am
overshadowed everything else. Finally, I gave up all going to sacrifice my life, pull my child out of the
efforts to ‘work’. Needless to say, I had spent day care centre and sit at home. No way!” I said
considerable time and energy pursuing all these emphatically.
various options and I was quite tired.” “Wait. Who said anything about sacrifice. I have
“And then...?” Sandhya’s story held me not sacrificed anything. To give personal attention to
spellbound. my child and house is also my need, just
“I could no longer run away from the “I quit work like the need to use my potential, my
thought of being a housewife, I was one. when I heard talent. I am going to address both of them.
Believe it or not, that is when I began to So what if I have had to quit the job I
that I was
transform.” loved. It involved a lot of travel, something
“How? I mean how did you change?
pregnant. We that I can no longer do. So, I am going to
Did you decide to sacrifice your dreams were in find something else equally good that I can
and just accept whatever came your way? Mumbai and it do out of my home.”
Became passive?” I was using strong was a new “You certainly seem to have worked
words. experience to be things out according to your
“First of all, I decided to relax. You at home, alone, requirements,” I complimented Sandhya.
know what that means. It means to stop until my “I have learnt a lot from your experience.”
chasing. It means just living for the husband “Oh! I totally forgot about the tea,”
moment. As if nothing in the past or future returned in the Sandhya stood up.
matters. It means taking responsibility for evening. “Let’s do that another time.” I had to get
your happiness. You know, I changed ready for office.
because I was affected by inner turmoil. I remember that, as I rode the elevator
With calmness came a realisation that the need to to our penthouse, I felt somewhat disturbed.
utilise my capabilities, my potential, remained Sandhya had stirred up some best-buried-not-to-be-
unfulfilled. That was causing me distress. Once I examined feelings that surfaced within me from time
understood that, my problem was half-solved. Now, to time.
L
“You know,, you are the only person I’ve met so for who ike at the school picnic when only my kid took
is peaceful about staying at home. Generally, the others
packaged food bought from the supersmart. Or
look to be a pretty unhappy lot.”
in the evenings when I pick him up and he is the
last one out. Or even during weekends, with no
friends to play with, Rohan, sitting in his room, all by
himself, chattering away with his imaginary friends.
Yes, since that day with Sandhya, my life has
changed. I am looking at Rohan with different
eyes now and I am concerned. He cries every
morning to go to school and, for the first
time ever, his cries are reaching my heart.
The packaged juice and a jam sandwich
in his lunch-box are making me
wonder. Is this even good for his
health?
I know that my moment of truth has
arrived. I have begun to ask myself
some difficult questions about how
well I am taking care of Rohan. I
don’t know what my decision will
be, but it will be a unique solution
to my unique needs.
Sandhya, the housewife, has
shown me the way. We
DISRUPTED BRAIN
CIRCUITS IN DEPRESSED PEOPLES
Dr Kiran Bala
One of the hallmarks of depression depressed individuals conscious
is that people with the condition seem effort to recalibrate their emotions
eople with severe depression to be unable to pull themselves out was thwarted by dysfunctional brain
P
respond to negative stimuli of a funk or black mood. In order to circuits.
differently. Studying the figure out what goes awry in these The researchers speculated that
response of depressed people situations, Johnstone and his signals from the prefrontal cortical
to negative stimuli, researchers colleagues conducted an experiment area of the brain are not getting
found that they have disrupted on a group of 21 depressed people through to the amygdala in the
circuits involved in controlling and 18 healthy controls. depressed individuals for reasons still
emotions. People with clinical Researchers tried to manipulate unknown.
depression may be unable to “snap them into a negative state of mind The findings suggest that
out of it” because of faulty wiring in and then watched how well they cognitive behavioural therapies that
the brain according to a new study could bounce back. A series of hold that individuals can change the
released by Johnstone a images of things such as car- way they feel about a situation by
neuroscientist at the University of accidents or threatening-looking changing the way they think about it
Wisconsin – Madison’s school of animals was presented to the may be counterproductive for some
medicine and public health. subjects and their response noted. In people. We
Winsome wonder
Unique ancient
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Touch of tradition
Lustrous locks
A Slice of Hope
Five months after Keya’s birth, her mother discovers the miracle
of motherhood. By Supriya Saraswati
What is life, one wonders and called her name “Keya,” but she did not
Power? Glamour? Wealth? Nope ! respond. Neither did she look at me nor did she stop
Life is just a slice of hope. crying. Maybe she did not recognise the unfamiliar
The sun, the breeze, the rain, the thunders sound or maybe the maid called her by some other
Create together that driving force name – I did not care. I just wanted her to shut up.
Life springs up from this single source.
I
rritated, I came up to my room and closed the
T
he universality of our dreams and emotions door. I diverted my attention towards the meeting
leads me into believing that perhaps my story scheduled that evening. I had little reasons to
isn't very different from yours and that the fear. My strategies, my staff, my company, never
same dream, the same emotion must have failed. In the rat race of business, victory almost
touched you at some phase of your life; that always kissed my feet, rendering my competitors
you too must have craved for that one reason mere also-rans. The glamour, the power associated
for your existence, one reason to smile, one with a company branded with an international status
ray of hope for warmth, a breeze to break free from did not permit me to get disturbed by a five month-
the smokes of suffocation, the tides to push you old and deviate thus.
ahead, not letting you stagnate, the colours that But what was wrong today? Why couldn't the maid
paint your life with exuberance. handle the baby today? Keya's screams grew louder
When was it that thoughts ceased to penetrate my and I made several unsuccessful attempts of ignoring
mind, emotions stopped touching me – is not in my her but, as I dressed up, she became quiet and the
memory but life lost its appeal, its charm, its magic.
The sun shone on me and the breeze aided the tides
to push me ahead, so what? What was I but a dead
leaf?
And then one day rain fell in torrents. Completely
drenched and on the verge of drowning and getting
lost in the depths of the ocean, I felt black, nothing
but black. Blackness engulfing me, choking me. I
looked up, perhaps for the last time before black
became me – slowly but surely black ceased to flow
in. It was a spectacular sight, blending into a single
gigantic force that radiated truth, peace, love, hope,
energy, faith and purity. That magnificent piece was
full of life, full of magic, full of colours and there was
no place for black in it.
I felt liberated at long last. Finally, my
rainbow had arrived and I breathed.
19 March 2005, at 5 months of age, all
Keya did was to cry out. It wasn't any
different that morning. She coughed, sniffled
and wheezed, but her wailing did not cease,
it was only broken by her hiccups. I wondered
what took the maid so long to sterilise her
bottles. Fed up with the noise I went to her room
sudden silence in the house steered my thoughts back
to Keya. She must have fallen asleep, I thought, as I
prepared to leave. I saw the clock ticking and
her up; it was magic.
Her tear-filled eyes
shone, there was a glint
SHORT
STORY
frantically searched for my car keys -–in my purse, on in them that held my gaze. She seemed to
the rack, in the cane basket. But the keys were radiate energy, radiate colours, radiate life –
nowhere to be found. In the silence that filled my my rainbow was born and it now emerged
house I heard a rattling sound – as I whirled around. I from its birthplace, my daughter's eyes.
found myself witnessing a spectacular sight. Keya was As I brought her closer to me, she
struggling to sit upright. She did manage that for a clutched my hair and let her gums dig into my
moment or two but then she nobbled and fell back, chin. A toothless smile was never so beautiful.
only to try again. She sat up, her hands Her small, chubby hands were
outstretched, my car keys dangling from her slapping my cheeks and as I held
As I brought her tight, she kicked me, her legs
right hand.
her closer to barely reaching my belly. As she
me, she
I
couldn't remember the last time continued kicking, I was taken back in time
something had intrigued me to this clutched my when Keya was still within me and I
extent, something that captivated me, in hair and let declared unceremoniously that I had felt the
spite of myself. I was getting late. I walked her gums dig first kick. Today, it was nothing less than a
to her and gently disentangling the bunch of miracle. A feeling seeped inside, an
keys from her hands I headed for the door.
into my chin. emotion filled my cold soul with warmth, a
What made me turn back and look at her is A toothless dream came to life, colours hustled out of
something I haven't yet been able to fathom. smile was blackness from me. Keya wasn't a reason
I saw tears trickling down her cheeks. I never so for me to live, she was life itself.
rushed to her. For the first time I touched her beautiful. Finally, I felt I was a mother, finally I felt
– she was so delicate, so fragile. I picked I was alive and, I breathed. We
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SWEET
4 slices of tinned pineapple
1 tsp of baking powder
1/ tsp of sodi bi carb
RELISH
2
3 eggs
1 cup of thick hung curd
8-9 tsp of sweetener
Here are some desserts to complete METHOD
your dinner. By Roma Sift together the flour, the
baking powder and soda, and the
CHIKKU KHEER sweetener. Beat the eggs in a
mixer. Mix in the oil and also mix
INGREDIENTS: in the hung curd. Blend the
3 chikkus mixture to obtain a smooth
1 litre of milk mixture.
4-5 tsp of sweetener – you could Place the sifted flour into a
increase or decrease this mixing bowl. Slowly add the egg,
amount as per your taste curd and oil mixture and blend
METHOD well to obtain a smooth batter.
Peel the chikku, remove the
seeds and mash the pulp with a
fork. Keep aside. Place the milk
in a thick-bottomed pan and bring
the milk to boil. Continue to boil For garnishing:
till till has been reduced to less a few pieces of
than half its quantity. Mix in the raspberries
sweetener and stir gently. Add the
fruit pulp and boil 3-4 minutes METHOD
more. Remove the thickened Soak the gelatine in
kheer and serve cold or at room half cup of lukewarm water
temperature. and leave aside for 3-4
minutes. In the meantime - wash
the raspberries, cut into halves Place the pineapple pieces on the
and then place in a mixer and bottom of a baking tray.
RASPBERRY churn to obtain a puree. In the You could cut the pineapple
SOUFFLE same mixture, add the hung curd,
grated paneer, the sweetener
into halves or leave the slices
whole. Pour the batter over the
INGREDIENTS: together with the fruit pulp and pineapples.
200-250 gm of raspberries churn the whole mixture gently. Place this tin in a preheated
200 gm of hung curd Pour into serving bowls and allow oven and bake at 180 degree for
150 gm of grated paneer to set. Before serving garnish with 40 minutes or until a needle
5-6 tsp of sweetener the berries or any other fruit and comes out clean when inserted in
21/2 tsp of gelatine serve. the centre of the cake. We
Q&
treatments like chemical peels,
micro-derma-brasion or even laser
I was told that honey can be used as procedures need more than one
a leave in hair conditioner. But I am session to give total effective results.
In summer I use curd as a base for sure it will be too sticky really. How to Ask a qualified dermatologist if you
my hair mask. However, it seems too use honey as a conditioner? want reassurance about how
cold in winter to use that. What is the Honey is a good moisturiser and if effective the treatments would be
alternative for this? you have dry scalp or any dandruff, it (especially if the recommendation is
I presume your hair is more dry is very good. It is best to mix a more than two of the same treatment)
than oily. You can use egg yolk as a teaspoon of honey in about 250 ml and ask for the correct time lapse
base, mix a teaspoon of oil if your of water. After shampooing your hair, between treatments.
hair is dry and if you have oily hair use this as a last rinse. It will not feel
you can mash up a fruit and add to it sticky. However, if you feel
A
(papaya and pineapple work best). uncomfortable you may leave it for My friend recently got married and
Leave for half an hour before about 10 minutes and then rinse swore that home treatments worked
washing off with tepid water. once again. wonders for her skin tone (they did)
and she said she used a lot of haldi
in her regime. Won’t that make me
I do not have much hair on my arms I am a working woman and when I look yellow?
and legs and tend to shave it when I am in a hurry I tend to always use a No, haldi or turmeric, if used
am wearing something sleeveless. Is hairdryer. Can this harm my hair? correctly will give the benefits of its
it harmful to shave too often? You should take certain care antiseptic qualities without leaving
You say that you do not have when using a hairdryer regularly. the yellow colour. If your skin is
much hair on arms and legs – then Don’t use it on very hot setting and normal to dry the combination of
why do you need to shave it at all? It use a nourishing conditioner for malai with besan (gramflour) and half
is a much better option to wax these healthier hair. a teaspoon of haldi used alternate
hair as that gives you smoothness for Also, towel-dry your hair as much days on face like an exfoliator would
up to three weeks. as possible before using the dryer. give great result.
If you are shaving your hair, Stop using the hair dryer before the You can also add it to your body
remember to use a gel afterwards hair turns totally dry. Leave it slightly scrub. Avoid using it for leave on face
that is moisturising and smoothens damp to minimise the harm. If your masks as that may leave a yellowish
the skin. hair is fine and long then you could hue.
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QA &
Are you a working woman who has
to leave her alone for prolonged
periods? Has she suffered from a
recent emotional trauma like
displacement in your attention and
affections due to the appearance
of a sibling or recent separation on
account of school?
Is there a family history of pica
and the child is merely following
the example set? As for
management of the situation, try
distracting her whenever she starts
scratching the wall, instead of
Q&
scolding and beating her. Give her
I have a five-year-old daughter. She a lot of love and attention. Try
is in the habit of scratching the wall substituting the plaster with chewable
and eating the plaster. Please tell me calcium tablets. Get her haemoglobin
how to make her stop this habit. I am tested since pica can be associated
afraid that it may cause harm to her with iron deficiency anaemia. Intake
My son is four years old. He is very body. of dirt can lead to worm infestation
short tempered and naughty. When Your daughter has a condition which has to be looked into.
he gets angry he starts throwing called pica which means a desire to
things around and screams loudly. eat non-edible things. Though the
He does not come around with cause is not known, it is often My elder son, aged 13, has started
words. Please tell me how to manage associated with neglect, deprivation behaving very strangely with his
him. He is our only child and we have or insecurity and even child abuse. father. He gets frustrated with
lessened our pampering. whatever his father says. On his part,
You have indeed pampered him my husband too keeps nagging him
I have a seven-
and in the process made him the and later says he said it for fun but no
years-old son. He
indisciplined brat he is today but all is one thinks it funny.
does not like to
not lost. You have to regain control My son has begun to shun us and
go out and play
over him so that he grows up to be a generally behave in an arrogant
with friends. The
responsible human being. You could manner. Kindly tell us how to manage
whole day he
begin by being firm and not relenting him as we are at a loss about what to
watches CDs on
whatever means he adopts to make do with him.
the computer.
A
you come around. Your son is going through a
Due to this, he
The next time he throws a confusing phase of life –
does not even complete his
tantrum, just ignore him. Let him adolescence. The hormonal surge is
homework quite often. Please tell
throw things around (keep valuables creating havoc with his psyche and
me what to do.
safe from him) and scream to his a nagging father in such a situation is
You will have to firmly restrict
hearts content. Do not pay any certainly not what he needs. Saying it
his time in front of the computer
attention and do not betray by word was all in fun will only worsen
no matter what it takes; even if it
or deed that his acts of defiance are matters. You will have to handle him
means keeping it under lock and
having any effect on you and do not with love and care and give him a bit
key. Let him rave and rant but do
give in to unreasonable demands. of space.
not give in. Make him understand
Tantrums are an attention- If he is arrogant and back-answers
that you will allow him time with
seeking device and if you react in any do not turn it into a shouting match.
the computer provided he finishes
way, it will have the effect he desires Talk with him when he is in a calmer
his homework and goes out to
and he will continue to do so. On the frame of mind and ask if anything
play for at least an hour.
other hand, if you pretend that specific is troubling him.
When he finally does come
nothing is amiss, he will give up the If he is not close enough to you
around, keep the computer in the
habit by and by. Later, when he is in both and does not open his heart to
living room so that you can keep
a calmer frame of mind, you can talk you, you could take the help of a
an eye on what he is watching, for
matters over with him. You could also psychologist. Most schools have
children as young as him get
hug and kiss him to let him know that teachers/sociologist who take care of
hooked onto sites not meant for
you love him but not that particular such issues.
children.
act of his. – Dr Amrinder Bajaj, MD.
I
an art. Hot babe Nikita always
does something different to
attract her guy, turn him on, and
let him explore his wilder side to
its best when it comes to taking a
leap on the bed. On the other
hand, Tanya who is physically
more attractive than Nikita,
always finds herself in big trouble
in a situation like this. She runs out of
new ideas and struggles to explore
the naughty side of her guy. She
finally ends up losing the sex battle.
This is not the story of Tanya
alone. Many females like her in this
whole wide world fall prey to such a
situation. “What to do?” is the
question that arises here. Does a
Nikita kind of babe is having a magic
stick in her hand? The answer is NO.
You can also be full of witty, whacky
and wild ideas that can make your
man go down on his knees.
So, to make your sexual relation-
ship a healthier one, here are some
of the coolest ideas:
Dress to kill: An attractive, sexy
outfit plays a major role in winning
the heart of the one you love. Your
guy would love to see you in a
transparent attire. So keep this in
mind and wear a see-through night
gown late evening to seduce him. Also
remember, do not put on any lingerie
to add a ‘little more’ to his excitement.
The touch game: They say
everything starts with a touch. You
can also play the touching game with
your guy to add more zing to your
relationship. Try to identify his
sensitive body parts like his neck,
SEXCITING
ears, tummy and areas below the
belt. Now touch and lick him there to
turn the heat on. Also, try moving
your hand on his chest and then
TO GO CRAZY
slowly coming down. It can be truly
HIM
the same bed, of course. So, get into
yourself. the bed having some naughty DVDs
to watch with him. Tell him that you
By Amit Wadhwa want to enact a naughty scene
playing in the movie with him. He is Dirty dancing: Dance is not by passionate look; speak with your
going to love this for sure. chance, it’s always a part of fun- sexy eyes, to have the time of your
A piece of advice: Pure porn/ - loving romance. Dance with him in life. Always remember the fact that
hardcore/XXX should be avoided in your room to a very romantic musical slow and steady always wins the race.
such a situation. number. Try ballroom dancing to a Lick, lick, lick: To seduce him in
Try love bites: Ever tried biting soft number while the two of you are a sexy and stylish manner, get some
on your partner’s body? If not, then wearing almost nothing. It will be ice cream or liquid chocolate. Of
let me tell you it is a REAL turn-on. great fun for sure. Also, when you course, it is meant to be eaten – but
So try it at least once. To start with, two are at home alone, slowly start in a more passionate way. All you
run your fingers between his upper undressing each other and shake a need to do now is, take a scoopful of
and lower lip so that he takes your leg together. This will turn out to be a the ice cream or chocolate and put a
finger in his mouth and starts sucking hot dancing affair that you will few melting drops of it on his body
it. Now move forward slowly and let remember for life. parts. The areas to be attacked on a
your breasts get closer to his chest. Act slowly: Always act as a slow priority basis are the lips, neck and
It’s the right time now to give him love poison. Do not give him everything cheeks. Now start the licking game.
bites on his ears, shoulder and neck. all at once. Make him wait; reveal Lick all that you have dropped on
This will surely have a crazy effect your assets like cleavage, in bits, but him. You will relish – it and he will
on him. not completely. Give him a cherish it! We
in the uterus and diseases like excessive loss of hair is generally
endometriosis, etc. may be responsi- due to nutritional deficiencies,
ble. It would be better if you see your following fever like typhoid, crash
doctor who after examining you will dieting and local diseases of scalp.
be able to decide the cause and treat Too-tight knotting or hair curling and
you accordingly. use of dyes may be other factors. It
Q
would be better if you see a specialist
in haircare who will be able to solve
I am 32 years and have been having your problem.
Q
menstrual problems. My doctor has
diagnosed it to be due to
endometriosis. I am worried. Please I am 40 years, overweight and have
help. recently developed dilated veins in
I hope your doctor has really done my legs. My doctor says these are
Q&
tests to confirm it. It is a condition in varicose veins. Please advise.
which the inlands of tissue from the Varicose veins are as a result of
lining inside the uterus invade the the defective functioning of the valves
surrounding structures and become in the veins with the result that blood
embedded in them. Trouble begins which travels in the veins upwards
when the monthly bleeding irritates towards the heart does not do so
surrounding tissues. properly. Due to of its sluggish flow,
A woman who suffers from it may blood accumulates in the dilated
have pain during sexual relation - veins and the circulation becomes
ships. Some women suffer from poor.
I am 30 years old and a teacher by sterility. Your doctor will be the right Due to poor circulation there is
profession. Of late, my voice has person to advise you on the course of hypoxia. If this process is allowed to
become husky. I have taken many treatment. continue varicose ulcers may form.
Q
treatments but had no help. Please Sufferers from varicose veins
advise. generally complain of aching and
Huskiness of the voice occurs in I am a college girl of 18. Recently, I swelling of the legs after prolonged
people who have to speak, much like read about a disease called ‘kissing standing. Women who are over -
you. There is swelling of the vocal disease’ what is it? weight are more likely to suffer from
cord which settles down after giving Kissing disease is so called varicose veins.
rest to them. But if this persists, firstly because it spreads by the act of There are two ways of treating it –
you should consult your ENT kissing. It is caused by the Epstein- the use of support stockings, and
specialist who after examining you barr virus and the disease is called keeping your feet up after standing.
A
will be able to plan the line of infectious mononucleosis. Generally, Long-standing cases of varicose
treatment. For your information there are symptoms of sore throat, veins may have to opt for surgery.
Q
huskiness of voice is common in headache, fever and enlarged glands
smokers and people with frequent in the neck. It is a self-limiting
throat infections. Polyps in the vocal disease and the person recovers My problem is that when my 12-year-
cords areas, poor functioning of the after a few days of bed rest in an old son takes bananas, eggs,
thyroid gland and, lastly, persistent uncomplicated case. chocolates, etc. he starts having a
Q
huskiness may be early sign of throat pain in the abdomen. Our doctor says
cancer. that he is allergic to these food items.
I am 35 years old. Recently, I have Please advise.
noticed that clumps of hair come out Allergy to certain foods is quite
I am 30 years old and married. My when I brush. At this rate I am afraid I common and many people are not
problem is that my periods are quite may become bald. Please help. aware about it. Your son, unfor -
irregular. Sometimes, I skip a month Before we talk of your problem let tunately, is allergic to the foods you
and then there is heavy bleeding and us understand the problem Normally, have mentioned. The only solution
two periods are back to back. Please you lose about 60-70 hair per day. for him is to avoid these foods.
advise. These are being replaced by new Beyond that nothing much can be
Your irregular periods point growth. done. Many people advise desensiti-
hormonal imbalances. Besides this When the new hair start growing sation procedures. But these are very
factor of stress, increase in weight these push the old hair out. So it time-consuming and generally not
and excessive exercise in addition to means your hair loss is probably due recommended.
factors like the presence of fibroids to the problem of hair turnover. But — Dr S. N. Khosla, MD.
ICE YOUR
FACE
A hot idea to bring back
the lost glow. By Vikas Kumar Jain
ave you ever tried icing to you do not want them to melt within returning to your eyes a few
H
bring a glow to your face? minutes because it has got to be moments later. Apart from making
Icing not only brings a glow, rubbed over a fixed period of time. your eyelids glow, it will also freshen
but also removes black Wrap a piece of the ice in cotton up your mood. Nature therapists
patches from your face. So cloth. Always use a soft cloth, often use ice on the eyelids to de-
icing is one of the best otherwise it may cause injury to your stress their patients.
home-made remedies to get skin. Once the ice has been wrapped Now, it’s time to stop. Like excess
a healthy, mark and spot- up, wait for half a minute. The piece of anything is bad, excess of icing is
free face. But how to do it of cloth will become cold and wet. bad, too. Stop after 15 minutes. By
remains a question. The You can now use it to ice your face. that time, your piece of ice will
answer is: the method is as simple probably have melted entirely. If it
as it is effective. So get ready. melts too early, get another – two-
Freeze water. Get a steel bowl, fill DE-STRESS THERAPY minute icings are of no great help.
it with water, and put it into the Begin icing by dabbing at your After going through the icing, dry
freezer. The reason for opting for a cheeks. Dab at your cheeks with the your wet face with a soft and clean
bowl, and not for ice-cubes, is that cloth containing ice. Then travel up towel. While using the towel, never
cubes melt too quickly, and returning your cheeks, moving the cloth in a rub your face. Instead, dab at your
to the refrigerator every two minutes gentle, circular motion. face with it until you feel that your
can be a irritating. Moreover, ice Continue this motion all around face is dry enough.
cubes are smaller. your face. If you have pimples, pause Icing your face once will be not be
Empty the bowl and break the ice. over them and softly press the cloth good enough. Once you start icing,
Once the water in the bowl has into your skin. This may cause your stick to it if you want to see results.
frozen, take out the ice. Hold the pimples to subside. Ice your forehead Repeat it once or twice every day,
bowl upside-down over a dish or pan and chin. especially at night before going to
in a sink, and open the tap. The tap Rest ice over your eyes. Ice and bed or after you have worked or been
water will cause the ice in the bowl to eyes are good for each other. Close outside in very hot, dry or rough
gently slide into the dish or pan your eyes and press the cloth over weather. And remember – when
underneath. Now smash this mass of them for a few minutes. If you feel icing, ''gentle'' is the keyword. After
ice into smaller pieces. Make sure too cold, stop doing it after half a all, you do not want to end up with a
that the pieces are not too small – minute and turn back to your cheeks, red face! We
SMART TIPS TO WORK
B
fluid fat. They are beautiful
works of art and symbols of
desire for men. For most
women, breast size is an
important part of feeling
good, desirable and normal.
Understand that a ‘normal,
healthy breast’ comes in
many different shapes and
sizes. In fact, ‘normal’ covers a wide
range of things. Normal for you may
be quite different from what it is for
other women. Furthermore, ‘normal’
also changes through the life stages.
For instance, before you reach
puberty and begin menstruating, your
breasts tend to be quite smooth.
Later, hormone changes tend to bring
on more texture and size. Through
pregnancy and feeding, your breast
size increases four to five times. Most
women never go back to their original
size after a baby. The bottom line
really is that big breasts can be
healthy and normal and loose,
sagging breasts can be healthy and
normal and firm, perky breasts can
be healthy and normal. Let us learn
to appreciate nature.
In fact, most pairs aren’t of the
same size. Asymmetry in a pair is
more common and more normal than
not. So don’t fall for the idea that
Baywatch breasts — usually hard as
rocks and almost pointing to the
ceiling, with lots of cleavage and a
perfect tan — are normal. Indeed,
they are desirable, attractive and can
be had for a price, but they are not
normal.
Usually, the difference in a pair is
so small, a woman only notices when
she examines herself closely. In
some cases, the discrepancy is much
more obvious — up to a full cup size.
The easiest way to correct the
difference is by placing a pad on one
YOUR BREASTS
Here’s how a woman can
make her natural assets more appealing.
By Dr Parveen Parkash
side of your bra. But if one breast is believe non-matching breasts are a
at least half a cup size larger, breast- risk.
reduction surgery in the bigger
breast, or an implant in the smaller Guidelines for the little girl who
one is the option. Talk to your gyno is growing into a young woman for
about risks, which in some cases selecting the perfect accessory:
include permanent scarring and loss ● There is no one ‘right’ age for
of breast sensitivity. Your nipples young girls to start wearing bras.
may not match either. This is normal, Depending on breast development, a
so don’t worry about it. The only time girl can start as early as 8 or as late
you should worry is if one or both as in her teens.
nipples suddenly change direction. ● To get the right bra, go into the
This may indicate a breast tumour. If changing room and try on a number
this happens get it checked by the of different bras. Once you find a
doctor. Asymmetry probably isn’t a suitable one, you should check for
health danger. Most doctors don’t proper support by jumping a little.
After
cleansing and
moisturising
apply Face
and Body
Model without make-up Illuminator
(FB-1) on face
for highlighting
Use concealer from Cream and glowing
Make-up Palette to conceal problematic areas effect.
and to give evenly tone to the skin.
W
exercise, can be done in
any open space, at a
suitably convenient time
and at any age. It’s a
wise investment for a
healthier life, and
requires no special
equipment except a
proper pair of light,
comfortable, well-cushioned shoes.
To keep fit and feel good, a
20-minute walk about four times a
week can be easily incorporated in
one’s normal schedule. Try to walk
on a clear, even surface like an
asphalt road instead of concrete
pavement and take firm, even strides
and swing your arms leaning slightly
forwards from the ankles.
Muscles of the legs are the largest
and strongest of all muscles. They
support body weight, maintain the
posture and help the blood plays a prominent part in fat loss and
circulation. in intensifying metabolic activity of FOR A WELL-
As legs move, the muscles the body leading to effective burning
squeeze the surrounding veins which of calories and maintaining a well- TONED, AGILE
force blood back effectively to the proportioned figures. BODY REGULAR
heart making it work better. Also, the A brisk walk for 15 minutes burns
dormant capillaries are roused that about 50 calories
USE OF LEGS IS
nourish the leg muscles. So a brisk Moving rapidly up and down the ESSENTIAL. MAKE
walk stimulates development of blood stairs burns 60 calories
vessels in the muscle tissue and Walking at a stretch for three
WALKING TO
makes legs shapely and strong. miles burns 300 calories NEARBY PLACES A
For a well-toned, agile body Lack of this easy exercise can add
regular use of legs is essential. Make up to a kilogramme of weight in a
HABIT. WALK TO
walking to nearby places a habit. month. Not just cutting calories but THE MARKET,
Walk to the market, movies, mall,
library and, if your workplace is not
regular physical activity aids in weight
reduction.
MOVIES, MALL
too far, then go on foot instead of AND LIBRARY.
waiting for the bus. Even if you have
your own conveyance park it at some MAINSTAY ACTIVITY as much as they can to reduce their
distance and walk up. Avoid the lift For most elderly, walking problems. Those who suffer from
and take the stairs ascending and becomes a mainstay activity to enjoy arthritis find walking gives them relief
descending. the fresh open air and take in from knee and ankle pain.
Men have more muscle than fat sunshine. It plays a crucial role in Alzheimer’s disease can be staved
on their bodies than women and as strengthening and toning most cells off as one stays mentally alert. The
muscles burn more energy than do of the body and also does make brain releases ‘endorphin’, a
fat, they have a much lower tendency many feel rejuvenated. The eyes chemical that makes the mind strong
to put on weight. Most women have become brighter, skin gets clearer and sharp, preventing the onset of
fat immediately under the skin and and spirits soar higher. dementia.
plump arms and heavy hips are Try some bending and stretching After the age of 50, high blood
stubborn trouble spots for a few of movements before setting off for your pressure (hypertension) is much
them. Due to poor blood circulation walk. Increase distance and speed more in women than in men and
fat deposits occur in certain areas of gradually but never go out late in the tends to increase further as years
the body. Putting movement in evening and in remote areas. While pass by. This psychological situation
routine chores makes leg muscles walking in the park or neighbourhood is often caused by mental stress,
flex easily and the pelvic saddle to be certain that people known to you financial and family problems, fear,
swivel effortlessly. Wrong eating are around. loneliness and also negative
habits and a sedentary lifestyle slows Diabetics whose general emotions. But a brisk walk boosts
down body metabolism. Exercise circulation is poor are advised to walk stamina, enhances confidence,
ensures better sleep, augments a
cheerful disposition and within a few
weeks, makes you feel a new person.
In fact, nothing can be equated
with fitness and even if the weather is
wet, windy or cold, don’t cut back on
this pleasant outdoor pursuit. For, by
not finding time to exercise, you’ll
have time for some illness.
It was over 2,000 years ago that
Hippocrates, father of medicine
advocated: “All parts of the body
which have a function, if used in
moderation and exercised in labours
in which each is accustomed,
become thereby healthy, well-
developed and age more slowly; but
if unused they become liable to
disease, get defective in growth and
age quickly.” We
B O M B AY F I L M D O M
seen sharing space with Amitabh ne can well imagine how thrilled
Bachchan in Teen Patti being made
by Leena Yadav.
Lifetime Achievement award, or does
he think he’s rather young for that
award?
O Dharmendra must have been
when he inter-acted with the
Rotarians during his recent visit to
Jaipur. When he was talking to them,
Abhishek with wife Aishwarya Rai – winning laurels. a few young Rotarians started
dancing and singing his song from
Pratigya: Jat Yamla Pagla Deewana.
FLAUNT
our country,
despite your
being stout and
IT WHEN YOU HAVE IT sturdy.
inally a website that attempts across the globe are warming up to
F
to break age old adage ‘You the idea of finding romance online.
have it. You flaunt it.’ to Registration is free for everyone.
widen it to ‘You have it more. Using this basic membership,
You flaunt it better’ Bringing members can create their
this thinking to life overweightshaadi.com profile and
is a revolutionary portal, upload their photographs. They can
www.overweightshaadi.com. be online in minutes and can search
Brainchild of two sisters, Aditi for suitable profiles and express
Gupta and Megha Singhal, interest in them. For more facilities,
overweightshaadi.com is a humble premium membership options are
attempt to help the plus sized find available. Premium members can
their life partners. send personal
Obesity previously seen essen - messages to other
tially as a western phenomenon has members and view
caught up with India as well. their validated contact
Go to any typical Indian household numbers as well. “Veri-
with a girl of marriageable age and fication of members is
you will find that all her aunts and thousands of plus size very important,” says
family members would be pestering people who are hard The site has equal
her to ‘lose’ her weight if she wants to pressed to find their life number of registered
get a good match for herself. partners. Launched in men and women. “If
So is it impossible for the October 2008, this not all women are size
overweight to find their ‘happily ever website has brought 500 zero then not all men
after?’ people all across the have eight pack abs
“Not any more!” Says Aditi Gupta, globe in touch with each either. The problem is
founder of overweightshaadi.com a other leading to two the same across both
matrimonial portal that promises to pairings. genders. When they register on our
deliver king-size romance to the The response has been website, their weight is no longer a
overweight men and women. overwhelming. From Delhi to stigma. That's why people ranging
With this belief emerged Mumbai, UK to USA and from UAE to from plump to obese register with
overweightshaadi.com, targeting Brazil, overweight people from all us,” says Aditi. We
I
decreased to a few burning (when just got married) when both of
embers: don’t get discouraged you had expectation, eagerness and
because even a little spark can excitement. So to revive the same,
REJUVENATE become a bushfire. The truth is
however much you love your
we suggest seven-step makeover to
perk up your intimate love-life.
1
husband, wife, the long-time
monogamous couples fall into a To keep the love and relationship
situation where lovemaking can alive between two people Kahlil
become stale. But being in Gibran says, “Let there be spaces in
twenty-first century with lots of stress your togetherness and let the winds
and so many temptations and of heavens dance between you”. So
titillations around you have to jerk very right by the deliberated space
yourself to keep the sexuality of your created between couples makes the
relationship alive. hearts grow fonder – the conscious
The spirit of adventure and decision is to deny sex for a certain
experimental attitude could make a period (decide mutually), otherwise
person look around to fantasise or... no is a very strong word – so make
(lose him/her). Before you face such sure no one of you feels rejected,
a situation you must understand that cold – shouldered or unappreciated.
intimacy being together overtime Otherwise you will be heading in
makes lovemaking satisfying but different directions. Instead of just
takes away the mystery unknown and saying no you can offer sensual
you slip into lazy cosy comfort zone. alternative to intercourse. i.e. “No, but
Lovemaking becomes a routine: a I would like to kiss you.” “No, but I
Saturday night special are a quickie would really love lying with you and
now and then the same bed, same talking.” The idea is to say no with
music, the same song and dance. love.
Thus, the excitement of making love There is a huge difference
withers away. between when you don’t have sex by
You have to devise new ways of choice and when you face the sexual
making love and bring mystery of denial. In the first incident it will go
unknown of the initial time of unnoticed, so it doesn’t matter but
YOUR
SEX LIFE
A seven-step
makeover to perk
up your intimate
love-life.
By Aruna Anand
when it is denied it has the power to Sex is supposed to be romantic and good initiators and stimulators during
enhance the sexual excitement and sensuous. Concentrate on your the sexual sessions but some of oils
feeling of desire and love. When you sensations, feel the pleasure of can create holes in the condoms.
are longing for your partner it is a touching each other all over. Check or replace the condom before
very emotional state of mind. Caressing, kissing are some of the final insertion.
Abstaining from sex for some time ways to excitement. And explore the If imported sex-toys are being
augments passion and by the time areas which have maximum used always soap-wash and clean
denial period is over the excitement passionate possibilities. Even if you them before your passion-play to
and anticipation reaches its peak to feel it is funny don’t bother but make protect yourself from the seminal and
light up your sexual fire with fresh sure you don’t laugh at each other. vaginal fluid left on the toys during
verve and enthusiasm. Rather laugh with each other. It your previous session.
2
would be fun because sex in fun you The lubrication gels and creams
In long-term relationship, sex needs should enjoy it, love it. used during the act can cause
5
extra effort to keep it new, so use allergies to your internal body parts if
your imagination. Don’t assume that Teasing your partner while the chemicals don’t suit the skin.
since you have partner you can stop touching can really boost the desire Have a patch test, apply little
grooming yourself. Exercise to keep to have more and more You can lubricant on the forearm or inside of
yourself in shape and dress nicely. tantalise at every step of the sexual your elbow. Leave it on for an hour, if
Your feel-good hormones will keep session, savour each sensation of there is any adverse effect i.e.
you healthy and happy. For special your body to get optimum pleasure. itching, redness or brightening of the
nights with your partner think what’s Titillation could be oral or manual, the skin avoid the use of this cream. Go
your attire tonight: sexy lingerie, dirty aim is to stimulate. Don’t hurry up in ahead and enjoy if it agrees with your
talk, moans and groans. Purpose is the frenzy of your desire to move on skin.
to tease and please each other. fast. Take time, go slow, very slow. It is always better to play safe
French knickers, G strings, lacy While teasing each other you will rather than facing any discomfort
garments are some of the things to come to know your pleasure points after having great sex.
7
put you in mood. One idea could be and moan zones which would give
to wear any beautiful dress on top of you the monogamy advantage for Now comes the time to
your sexy inner garments. Start your better sex life. interconnect and enter. An American
6
foreplay with clothes on as the sex researcher says, “Mostly couples
passion fever rises, peel off your No doubt everyone is getting more close their eyes which blocks out the
clothes or remove each other’s dress and more conscious of the final sensations but the enjoyment
to reveal the natural you. You could temptations and flirtation available all gets manifold stirred if the partners
devise new ways to make your around and ready to explore and get blindfold each other turn by turn.”
sexual pleasure a delight to keep the adventurous in bed. India has given Kama Sutra to the
feeling of ecstasy pulsating. Whatever type may world. The erotic sculptures
3
be your relationship long of our Ajanta Ellora and
Create an ambience to heighten and steady or the Khajuraho caves are still
your sexual urge. Soothing atmos - shorter one. Hold on a relevant in the world of
phere to erase stress can be moment and find out the YOU HAVE TO pleasure. Skills of
developed with satin sheets, candles, do’s and don’t about DEVISE NEW seduction reveal the
aroma potpourri perfumes, flowers using different props forbidden desires.
feathers to tickle, chocolates, ice during you sexual WAYS OF And what you desire
creams, honey, erotic movies are session. MAKING LOVE you cannot resist. Once
some of the things which can pump Ice creams, choco- your sexual desire is
up the libido. Perfumed massage oils, lates and honey, etc. AND BRING reawakened your fantasies
vibrator are said to be great soothers offer great fun and MYSTERY OF come true to pleasing
and exciters. Soft music playing in stimulation during the
the background and candle-light foreplay of your passion
UNKNOWN satisfaction. You don’t have to be
dinner could be your beginning point – session. Sprinkle – lick OF THE INITIAL fully guided by the Kama
so just don’t despair anymore, or smear-lick off or just Sutra postures. Follow your
experiment with all these props and tease-eating provide
TIME OF heart and mutual
get started with your passion play with exciting sensation. LOVEMAKING comfortable position.
lots of imagination and sexual dreams. But be careful, never Don’t get hooked to one
IN YOUR
4
stuff anything eatable in posture of making love,
Don’t get into wham-bam-over the vaginal tissue and RELATIONSHIP. experiment and play
routine of sex. Intercourse should not cause bacterial infection. with different styles and
be the only goal between couples. Massage oils are the angles. We
Group shows
2007 at Shanta Art Gallery, Delhi. ABSOLUTE NARRATIVE
through faceless dimensions
2006-07 at Krishna Collection Art
Gallery, Delhi.
2002 at Lalit Kala Academy,
New Delhi.
1979-80-82, at Academy of Fine
The artist believes that
Arts, Kolkata. “art and time are synonyms with each other”.
1979-82-84, at Birla Academy of
Fine Arts, Kolkata.
By Our Correspondent
India Habitat Centre, Lodhi Road, ine-drawn lines, graphic The ‘women without a face’
F
New Delhi linearity, realistic touches depictions evoke mythical goddesses
Awards etched by the lines, give the of matchless beauty who today
art works of Biplab Biswas a become epitomes of the contemporary
1978 : Annual exhibition in Indian resplendent outlay, couched Indian woman. The more angular and
College of Arts & Draftsmanship, at times, in an arousal of direct portrayals are pictorial and
Kolkata. curiosity. After all, what is it relate to a rural construct.
Workshop: Painting woodcut etching that these images of men and
linocut organised by Birla Academy, women, so close and yet so What about the woman of
Kolkata. severely demarcated by today, living in our cities and are
Lokakat Art Gallery, Delhi. dividing lines, are trying to convey? mothers, daughters, sisters and
Participation The answer lies in a voyage of wives?
discovery, about the portrayal of These are symbols of domesticity
1980-90 : All India Fine Arts Annual femininity, under the guidance of and become powerful metaphors,
Exhibition, Kolkata. Biplab Biswas. sometimes tweaked to create
1980- 90 : Birla Academy of Fine mirages of bliss and satisfaction,
Arts, Kolkata. What is the essence of thought whose actual plight is hidden in the
Experience that lies behind your folds of the mind’s eye,
varied portrayals of and which can be
15 Years illustrations work, lots of feminine forms, since they unearthed only through a
magazines, papers, calendars, etc. range from front-face tryst with romanticism.
Collections depictions to faceless
creations? What do you actually
Indian Oil Petroleum Corporation I am drawn towards want to portray by
Jeevan Beema Nigam Office, Kolkata. womanly forms in art, but I making the woman
P.D. Advertisement Agency, Kolkata. portray them with incomplete figure in your art an
Monar Hotel LImited, Kolkata. facial features, or even emblem of romanticism?
Bangalore, Haryana, Vadodara, Ujjain, totally faceless forms. Without being romantic
France, Delhi, Kolkata, Mumbai
Femininity relating to a rural construct.
I
canvases wear a soft, gossamer-
AIR
like imagery, that transform visual
structures into relationships
between nature and woman. For
him, the woman in his art works is
the symbol of nature and nature in
the works is a way of depicting the
many manifestations of the air WITH A
BRUSH
around us. In his personal
contention, the air that influences our
lives, is not ‘seen’ by the naked eye.
But each one of us feels the air,
particularly its power, when it
manifests itself as a violent storm, a
cyclone or even a gentle breeze. In An artist who
all these forms it mirrors the feelings
of a woman, he feels, the feelings
depicts characters
that range from fear, violence, or
sheer joy, evident in the form of
from films of a films of Satyajit Ray’s classics, as the
basis of his art. Productions like
breeziness. Adding to the air of world-renowned Charulata and Apu’s Sansar hold
mystique that envelope his canvases special meaning as Apu grows from
is Singha’s use of colour. The light movie-maker. boyhood to manhood in a series of
blue merging with vermilion, the his canvases. These aspects of
sinuous forms, the emblematic lotus By Our Correspondent vibrant imagery and translucent
and the ascetic garb of the monks, colour applications have made his
enhance this overlay. Life seems to works acquire a sensibility that few
emerge from behind a tracery of others can achieve on their
dragonfly wings, where texture and canvases.
colour applications cease to be Excerpts from an interview:
technique and become a way of You chose Satyajit Ray’s
expressing the narrative behind the movies as you subject. Are’nt you
painting. scared of critics?
In yet another metamorphosis, Everyone takes inspiration from
Bhaskar Singha has used somewhere like landscape,
contemporary cinema, particularly the construction, feelings and other
Resisting a violent storm to save himself from any harm coming his way.
I
Patna, Port Blair, Patnitop, visit the lofty mountains, then just eyes, with their juxtaposition of
Hyderabad, Maharani Bagh, make it a point to visit a showing colours like greys and blacks, with
S.K.Parishad, Dhoomimal City of the works of artist Harish reds and yellows, and also greens
Gallery, Art Mall Orissa National Srivastava. This eminent artist and lemon. His palette is clean. He
Camp 2008 has perfected the art of making does not use a wide pallete, as most
Awards mountains in such a spectacular of the colours are repeated on
manner, that the original different canvases. Such a controlled
National Awards of LKA in 1980; Himalayas, after which they are palette allows him to have a unified
AIFACS, New Delhi, 1983; All India fashioned, begin to pay a experience. There is controlled
Exhibition of Shilpa Kala Parishad, thumping salute to his creativity. For energy at work since each stroke
Patna, 1981; All India Exhibition of decades now, this leading master of finds its rightful place in the overall
Orissa LKA in 1980, Annual Indian art, has been having an ‘affair’ appearance. Despite this rigour
Exhibition of Sahitya Kala Parishad, with the Himalayas. His everlasting executed during the work, there is no
Delhi, 1986; Sr Fellowship by Deptt. romance with the mountains is as hint of a limited ambience in the
of Culture – Government of India. much as 35 years, starting off with mountainscapes.
He is ex-deputy sec. (prog.) of his first exhibition in Jaipur, which set The forms that appear in the
LKA, ND., ex-asstt. Sec. of S.K. critics on the roll and which made him paintings convey the movement in
Parishad, ND., ex-vice president, an instant favourite with the art-loving the art works to the viewer. It can be
India – Soviet Nikolai Art Club, New public. seen in the snow as grey and white,
Delhi. The magic he creates amongst or the rippling waves of the sea in
the ranges is worth appreciating. The light and darker blue shades, the
oil painting of Harish Srivastava deep shades of brown for the land.
conforms to his special feelings and His strokes overlap in a particular
attachment for the mountains, as movement and sometimes,
they vibrate with bright shades. Both interruptions in the motion are also
as a painter and as a human being, visible. He uses fresh colours spread
he seems to be fascinated by the over large areas resulting in the
majestic beauty of the mountains. forming of sweeping lines of
The beauty of the panoramic mountain peaks. The red at the
views are enchanting and create a bottom areas of the landscapes is a
Woman’s Era
●
March (First) 2009
99
Magic in Mountains – The range by Harish Srivastava.
altogether.” He further says, “I visit
hill stations to draw a sketch of the
mountains and ambience around
them and then return home.”
Even at this age he devotes at
least four to five hours daily in the
very dramatic contrast to it. early mornings to his work. He says
The water colour technique of his the more he works the younger he
earlier years is unique in the sense feels as it gives him new energy and
that he maintained the transparency satisfaction in life. He has guided
of the colour and managed his many upcoming artists in all respects
texture variation with deft handling of and included them in camps, shows
the wash technique. and exhibitions co-ordinated by him,
Harish Srivastava’s love for the providing them with a platform in the
mountain is so deep that one can field of art.
fathom a mountain view even in an His advice is to keep working to
ordinary conversation with him. He get along in this field. Some day, he
says: “The mountain with the yellow assures, a day of perfection will be
hue looks different at noon, while the felt by the pursuer of art. Presently
same mountains with the sun setting he is working as a co-ordinator of Art
behind them give a different view Mall in Delhi. We
again. But I feel that it is unfair to ask result, I fell in love with him as I grew
the woman to leave when she has up. I declared my love for him to him
paid me in advance and has spent a four years ago. At that time, he told
I am a married, 30-year-old woman lot of money setting up her boutique. me that he loved me too and that he
with two children. My husband is What should I do? would marry me when he was settled
34 years old. I am a full-time home- Your anguish is understandable, in life. But since then, he has had
maker. but you have to get on with your life. many girlfriends and written them
We have a big house and some You may take a long time to learn to passionate e-mails and met them. I
months ago, I got the idea of letting trust your husband again, but you know this because I know his
out the front portion to a tenant. I have to give him a chance for the password and access his e-mail
then found a woman who wanted a sake of your children and because account when he is not at home.
portion such as we had to offer. you are not financially independent. When I confront him he always
The woman was attractive, warm Again, though your husband might apologises and says that he will not
and friendly and frankly told me that have the best of intentions as far as have any more girlfriends, but when I
she had left her husband because he forgetting the woman and being true go into his email account, I invariably
beat her. She said that she was a to his family is concerned, it is better see sexy and passion-filled mails.
fashion designer and that she would that he doesn’t face temptation. So My cousin continues to say that
open a boutique in the hall opening speak to the woman and tell her the he will marry me. But I am not sure.
onto the street. truth. She may then herself think that Should I tell his mother (my aunt)
I let her have the portion and she it is better to leave. However, she about his affairs and ask her to get us
promptly paid me a year’s rent in may also refuse to leave on the married right away?
advance. But I am now regretting grounds that she has paid you in Parents make a very serious
what I did because my husband has advance and spent money setting up mistake when they put ideas about
fallen head over heels in love with her boutique. You can then do love and marriage into young and
our tenant. nothing except keep an eye on your impressionable minds. It is probable
He often went to visit her in her husband. You should also provide that you and your cousin “fell in love”
boutique and even started helping him with a loving family atmosphere only because you were told that you
her in transporting materials, etc. so that he is not tempted to stray. Be would be getting married. In your
Finally, he told me that he loved her friendly with the woman if she stays case the love was deeper, perhaps
and that he was going to try and get so that she stays loyal to you. because you were younger than your
her as his mistress. cousin, but in his case, the “love” was
When I created a scene and brought about by a sense of duty
reminded him about his children, he I am a Muslim girl aged 22. In our rather than by true attraction.
gave in and told me that he would community it is common for cousins This is why your cousin is
never talk to her again. He also told to marry and since I was a child I was behaving like any man of his age
me to tell the woman to leave. told that I would marry a cousin who would and has girlfriends whom he
I am heartbroken and am not sure is five years older than I am and who is attracted to. There is really nothing
whether I can ever trust my husband lives next door to my family. As a wrong in his behaviour.
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another day and they do not they had the first ever presence of
plan anything specific or special, but Avocado Oil from South Africa.
for the common public the pressure is Avocado is technically a fruit but is
on to impress their ‘love’ with considered a vegetable when it
expensive goodies. comes to enjoying it in salads or
An innovative idea came from F sauces. The production of edible
Bar & Lounge in Ashok hotel where avocado oil is not that old even in
they began the celebrations on 13th South Africa.
night, just before midnight and for the The company Westfalia in South
Valentine day special cover was Africa has mango and avocado
declared for young lovers who could orchards. They have been exporting
not get away in the evenings due to the oil to cosmetic companies in
curfew or choice and could enjoy an Europe and America for the last few
afternoon with their special friend years – almost 80% of their
while the DJ belted out the love production. However, the edible oil is
songs and dance numbers of not only delicious when enjoyed with
Bollywood. Anything for earning that crispy bread it is healthier than many
extra buck! other edible oils, almost at par with
olive oil. Except it has one advantage
Valentine Mania. AVOCADO OIL over the olive oil too. As its burning
point is a lot higher than olive oil, it is
LAUNCHED more suited for Indian style spice
IFOWS is an annual show for food tempering and deep frying without
VALENTINE FEVER and beverage lovers in Delhi, and of breaking the oil.
Even as political goons beat up course trade people to decide what to Apart from cooking in it, the oil is
young girls who are in the pub and import in India. In the last few years it being infused with other essential oils
threaten to disrupt the events of has been beverages and food items
Valentine by harassing young lovers, like olives, olive oil and many other
the fever of Valentine is not to be delicacies that have now become
ignored. Though not so old in the available in India. In the past they
Indian cities, this celebration of young have had gala dinners and gourmet
love has really taken off. safaris that have provided immense
Literally every restaurant and pleasure to food lovers of Delhi. This
every hotel has been offering special year the show, held in January, was
deals, musical events and other ways smaller due to many cancellations
to entice the business of youngsters following the Mumbai terror attacks.
and mature revellers alike. Shopping However, it is not often that one
malls have had their foyers decorated finds a brand new product. This year
with red and white balloons and other
festivities like loud live bands are Launch of Avocado oil in India on
there to take money out of your IFOWS platform.
pockets.
Probably in the end it becomes
less about celebration or love and
more about consumerism as one is
expected to give expensive gifts and
declare one’s love. People forget that
Valentine is not just about love
between a boy and a girl but
also love and respect to your
teachers or others where the notion
of sex does not even enter the
equation.
Film stars like Kareena Kapoor
and Saif Ali Khan whose love story
is more public than private have been
on record to say that in their busy
lifestyle the Valentine Day is just
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A lot of
questions
can be asked
about the past
performance
of Sheila
SHEILA’S FIVE YEAR
PLAN IN
NEW INCARNATION
3
his period is very crucial for
rd
T
Delhi. Sheila Dixit’s 3rd term surprise mandate to Sheila Dixit to
Government? shall be very eventful as the rule over Delhi for 3rd consecutive
Common Wealth games will term for 5 years. Such results in
What about her be held in 2010 and their favour of Congress inspite of the
success shall depend upon preceding unusual and anarchic
third term? Sheila Dixit’s astute planning prevailing circumstances before
in reshaping Delhi for the elections like Mumbai terrorist attack,
By K. M. Sharma games. Metro shall be skyrocketing prices and disturbed law
entering in its 3rd phase of and order problem, etc., exposing the
implementation. Delhiites may total failure of the government, came
witness extensive reconstruction as a bolt from the blue. Everybody
programme wherein it is quite expected a non-Congress
possible that trees will be denuded, Government as a natural corollary of
useful marshland may be encroached people’s complete disenchantment
upon, nature’s gift greenery may with the Congress’ questionable
vanish. So any environmentalist will governance. But the fact is that
have an hawkish eye on such Sheila Dixit’s government being in
developments. There shall be lot of power could manipulate the purchase
exhilarating activities in the times to of the slipping victory by doling out
come. various populist measures one after
The election results of Delhi the other, just before elections.
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It is nothing but bribing the voters. east Delhi has been given compete
Why the Government preferred to facelift (her son’s constituency)
remain silent all the 41/2 years? Has popular scheme etc., etc. It is her
the government thoughtfully own assessment no doubt, but many THE ELECTION
calculated the financial implications
of these fanciful schemes which will
people don’t accept it and I am one of
them. I have however touched here
RESULTS OF DELHI
be requiring a huge financial outlay. some critical aspects of her rule in ASSEMBLY ON
From where this huge amount
resulting in several hundred crores of
10 years affecting the life of the
common man quite adversely.
28.11.08 GAVE
rupees shall be arranged as the Transport policy: As such there A SURPRISE
population of such beneficiaries MANDATE TO
are in lakhs? Whereas the
government feels reluctant to SHEILA DIXIT TO
increase the pension on amount RULE OVER DELHI
of ex-army men who have
sacrificed their lives for the sake FOR 3RD
of the country. These ex- CONSECUTIVE
armymen were on hunger-strike
at Jantar Mantar Delhi to press TERM FOR 5 YEARS.
the government for the increase
in their meagre pension. Does it
not appear shameful for a
democratic government to
become so insensitive to the cause of
the armymen? Simply because their
vote percentage seems to be
insignificant to the overwhelming
number of jhuggi dwellers.
If we recount and recapitulate the
unpraiseworthy days of Sheila Dixit
government during 1st and 2nd term
we can easily conclude that she has
immensely contributed to the
destruction of the peace, tranquillity,
grandeur, culture and heritage of this
beautiful city. Once a peaceful and
manageable city has now been
transformed into a mega city badly
As such, there is no transport policy of Delhi Government.
governed, shockingly stinking,
dangerously polluted, lamentably is no transport policy of Delhi comparatively higher. These buses
unsafe for ladies, where influx of Government. Everything looks are plying on selected routes with
population remains unchecked, hotchpotch. As usual, blue line buses irregular time table and are in league
where people cry for far from the have claimed their 10th victim. In with blue line buses.
maddening crowd”. Everywhere in 2008 the figure was 200, in 2007 it From the nodal points, these
the city we find a jostling crowd was 298, so on and so forth. Even in buses in the group of three start
consisting of interstate migrants from the face of the public outcry Sheila simultaneously and consequentially
Bihar, UP, southern states, illegal Government did not phase out these run half-full. The report about these
migrants from Bangladesh, Pak, buses on one pretext or the other. In low-floor buses is very adverse
Nepal & various other countries. This a span of 10 years she could not including my report. They are not as
city is vunerable to all sorts of manage any alternative and viable spacious as DTC buses. The
terrorist activities and shadow of proposal for their phasing out standing capacity in these buses is
terrorism always looms large over programme. Somehow the killer only for a line and there the
this city. She, however, fought this buses are on the roads and shall passengers can’t cross without their
election with full emphasis on the remain so. Now the government in a clothes being torn or buttons
development work done by her. She hastily formulated policy ordered low- dislocated and dress spoiled. They
asserted, “I have transformed the floor buses of green colour non-air carry lesser number of passengers.
face of this city by making lots of conditioned with the ordinary fare and As the engine is on the back side so
flyovers, giving red light-free travel, red colour A/c buses but their tariff is the temperature in the bus increases
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cards and passport as Indian used in the preparation of meals are
citizens. Can she deny a complete very sub-standard and of defective
collusion of her govt’s departments and expired quality. Educational
in facilitating these illegal Bangla authorities are very insensitive to the
Deshis for their stay in Delhi and health and growth of these students
enable them to cast their votes which and they not only deserve full
contributed substantially to her condemnation but should be
present victory. punished exemplarily. Is Madam
Their settlements in Jehangir Puri, listening? Lady teachers are
Madan Gir, Okhla, Seema Puri, etc. thoughtlessly put on election duty in
are always an eye sore to the local remote areas. School students are
bona fide citizens. They have beaten made to stand in scorching summer
the police teams as and when police or chilled winter for any or every
entered their settlements to catch a government-sponsored function. A
criminal or any wanted person. But
government would not retaliate to
cruel practice indeed! Selection
grade (APC) has not been given to
THE CONDITIONS
teach them a lesson and round them many teachers (especially ladies) OF THE HOSPITALS IN
up for deportation or take any
criminal proceedings against them.
even after the completion of 24 years
of service on one pretext or the other.
THE CAPITAL ARE SO
They indulge in all sorts of organised In other words, the educational deptt APPALLING THAT
crimes and government could not
check their menace by religiously
lacks transparency in its working and
suffers from bureaucratic snobbery.
PEOPLE PREFER TO
following vote-bank politics. They are In fact, education directorate should GO TO PRIVATE
threat to the security of the country have a personnel department to NURSING HOMES
as they tend to act as the local handle staff-related matters on more
modules for the terrorists across the scientific lines instead of being run WHERE THEY ARE
border, either Pakistan or Bangla on personal whims of officers. ALSO FLEECED.
Desh. In such a scenario can India
ever be able to control effectively Multiple enactments: Delhi deliberately avoided and the result is
terrorism with so many “Chhipay Government under Mrs Sheila Dixit that there is no noticeable change in
Huae Gaddar” in the country? shows lot of enthusiasm to enact the situation.
various laws to prove that her Some years ago a law was
Educational policy: The situation government policies are very passed to ban throwing of litter on
on educational sector is far from progressive and keeping pace with road, footpath, near homes or
satisfactory. The condition of schools the times, if not moving ahead of commercial places as they constitute
is the clear index of any govt’s time. But their implementation is far an offence punishable by a simple
educational policy. Her Govt has also from satisfactory. Anti Smoking Act imprisonment or a fine or both. But
failed in this important sphere. The in public is such an act which the what is the result? Zero. Delhi is a
condition of most of the schools is people don’t bother to obey. You can stinking city with litters all around on
irritatingly bad. Many schools are still find people smoking everywhere roads, near houses, near shops and
being run in tents with no proper including Sheila’s own office and the other places. Government authorities
facilities. The schools which have rate of punishing the violators is are not bothered about the
their buildings are in no better negligible. Similarly, recently an order implementation of this important law.
position. Many buildings need prohibiting the use of plastic bags They have not even learnt from Delhi
repairs, water coolers, working fans, under Environment Protection Act Metro Management as to how such
good furniture and proper sanitation. 1986 has been issued by Delhi an act can be implemented in all its
It is well known that most of the male Government. It is a good sign that essentials. It is really creditable on
teachers run their private business Delhi Government has banned plastic the part of Delhi Metro that its
and somehow manage to remain bags. The ban follows Delhi High stations and adjacent environment
absent from school and their allotted Court order based on justice R. C. remains spick and span which shows
periods are taught by proxy. Chopra Committee report. that hygiene and sanitation are high
Adverse reports are daily pouring The problem with plastic is that on the agenda of D.M.R.C. which is
in that there is lot of corruption in the they are durable and degrade very totally missing with Delhi
midday meal scheme. Stale food is slowly. The ones above 40 micron Government. Will Mrs Sheila Dixit
usually provided to the tender are better. To make it effective constitute a committee to review the
students resulting in food-poisoning legislative measures would not be of implementation of the laws passed
cases, ill-health and lot of other much help because in our country the by its government to make due
physical complications. Ingredients compliance law is not only lax but corrections? We
Mirror, mirror
on the wall
10
7 11
16
18
12
17
P
are the commonest cause of sterility in a young woman. These
morbidity and poor health in may be defined as inflammation of
young women of child- the genitalia due to infection either
bearing age. A great introduced from outside or by
percentage of women infection ascending upwards from the
coming to the clinics with cervix and vagina.
poor health and vague Of the various causes responsible
abdominal pain suffer from it. for producing pelvic infection, the
Often, these unfortunate commonest is injury to the genital
women are treated for vague organs during delivery when this
abdominal symptoms and pain in the becomes infected. Though this
back. It is a frustrating experience for incidence has been considerably
any woman when she finds that reduced due to the use of better
despite extensive medication there is aseptic techniques at the time of
no relief and in many women the delivery, in a great number of women
symptoms get exacerbated. who are delivered by local untrained
Pelvic inflammatory diseases dais in villages, the incidence of tears
assume significance because of not to the cervix with resultant infection is
only producing immediate suffering very high.
A
grown up amidst a variety formative years. His experiences as a
of human sentiments. All child still leave an imprint on his
these sentiments have artworks.
played a crucial role in Excerpts from an interview:
moulding his artistic talent. When did you realise that you
The son of a medico father, should be an artist?
who was in the INA, and I am the only person in my family
later on, when the INA was to take up art as a profession. My
dismantled, joined the father was a medico in the INA and
Army Medical Corp of the Indian later on, in the Army Medical Corp.
Army, Anoop has seen different His job was transferable and as such
we never had a settled life. I have
had my schooling and higher
education in Allahabad, where we
were living in the compound of the
Swarup Rani Hospital. I had a strong
inclination towards art since early
childhood and used to draw on the
last pages of virtually all my
textbooks.
Q
2
When you’re around him, he makes
you feel...
a. Truly beautiful, inside and out, genuinely
happy.
b. Generally unhappy, he treats me like dirt.
c. Somewhat excluded; like I not really there
with him.
Answer
&
the questions win a
grand prize...
3
lucky
winners will
GETTING MARRIED
?
WILL YOU PROBABLY END UP
TO THIS GUY
Are you curious about whether this guy is
right for you or not, or could he be the one?
Although a quiz can’t answer everything;
S
hopefully this gives you and idea.
elected entries will be published in the
forthcoming issue of Woman’s era. Look out
get the for the 15 April 2009 issue
book
L ast date for sending entries: 31 March 2009
Attach a photograph of your friend for a better
chance of featuring in Woman’s era
S
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Q
3
You both have differences, you
resolve them by...
a. Usually agreeing to disagree.
Q
7
You both spend time together...
a. Hardly ever, he never seems to have
time for you.
b. Always hearing each other out and b. Sometimes, when it’s convenient.
appreciating what the other has to say. c. Whenever we can, although friends
c. I pretend that everything’s always perfect and family are also important to me.
and there are no differences between There is a balance.
both of us.
Q
6
You took this quiz because...
a. I am serious about the relationship and
I really think it will work out.
b. I am hesitant, will this really work or are
Q
10
If he popped the question,
you would
a. Say, yes, because it feels like the only thing
we simply too different? I can say to a proposal.
c. Just for fun really, I don’t care. If it works b. Say no, I don’t want it to get that serious
out, it works out. c. Say yes, in a hearbeat.
Q&
favouring his wife. Maybe he feels happen to like films. How should I
that he is working more or maybe he handle this?
is just not doing it because you have You should not attempt to change
not asked him to! their opinion. It is a matter of
It depends on what your role in the personal likes and dislikes. You
business is – talk to him and define cannot make them like films if they
I work in a multinational company your duties and remuneration, tell do not want to. Yes, they should not
and have a great family life too. After him that you need that the company make you feel small about it and you
five years of marriage I am expecting respects your input and that you want have to be patient for a while but tell
my first baby and want to work for as to get your market value. But be them that they need to respect your
long as possible. Can I decline travel careful, at some point you have to be personal choices.
assignments now, and what do I tell ready to hear his point of view as It is always a done thing to make
my company? Also what kind of fun of a new bride, so maybe you just
clothes should I wear to work where need to give them some time.
most colleagues are men? I was a career However, do voice your views on
It is good that you have a good woman who got their inability to accept your choices
job. You have to tell the truth to your married and now and tell them that maybe, just maybe,
company about why you are had my first baby. I you are more tolerant as a person
declining travel jobs. They will know would like an other despite being qualified professional
soon enough. If you behave profess- child before going because you see films!
ionally they have the chance to find a back to working life.
replacement for your travel while you What is the right age difference
are indisposed. Remember, though, between children and how to I am the only child of an
A
that you might not be able to travel ensure that I can fit back into army family. As we kept
for quite a while even after the baby working life? moving and shifting with
arrives and if travel is imperative to Doctors and social support dad’s posting, I never had
your job, it might be a good idea to people suggest a three-year age lasting friendships and now
think of a job change though you can difference but siblings with less I am married and my
join again after your maternity leave age difference can also grow up husband has friends whom
and then look for alternatives. Wear well together. It depends on how he has known all his life. I feel so left
clothes that are loose-fitting made well you are coping with the baby out and jealous. What do I do?
with natural fabrics, cut to camou - and how supportive your husband Make up for lost time and make
flage the bump and something that is with home duties. Going back beginning of lasting friendships now.
you are comfortable in. to a career after a long break is Yes, it will be difficult but when you
never easy. get married you have a new set of
See if you can do something family and often inherit a new set of
I am as qualified as my husband and that gives you sufficient time with your husband’s friends.
help him in his business. However, I the kids at home or something Make a gesture to be accepted by
feel that of late he is constantly part time; or you can opt for them. After all the wives of his friends
putting me down and, while he takes working from home. However, are also new in the circle, maybe you
a lot more money than I, he does not remember that children do need can begin with them. If you make
increase my allowance when he the mother – that has not changed genuine efforts people will warm up to
increases everybody else’s. Why he and, while a career is rewarding, you in the same way that they are
does this? so is bringing up your children. close to your husband. Yes, it will take
There could be a variety of time but it will be worth your while.
S
anjukta was startled. She looked up at Nihal, On the way home, Sanjee was lost in whirl of
wondering whether she had heard right? Or thoughts. She had not even realised that Nihal was
maybe the signs and symptoms were already interested in her. But then, maybe, she hardly ever
there since long ago, only she had failed to noticed anything since her work was everything. She
notice? Nihal was good in all respects, no didn’t realise it when she reached home.
doubt. But she never... “What happened?” “Maasi! How come you are here?” Rushing
Nihal laughed. “You are looking as if I’ve said towards Mala, Sanjee sat near her and
something unspeakable...? Was it wrong to ask...?” affectionately pulled her by the arm, “Haan, I’ve
“Oh, sorry. No... I didn’t mean to be rude,” finished painting all the motifs and was going to
Sanjee said hastily, “but... but I never expected... bring your sari in the evening. You couldn’t wait till
anticipated this.” That was true, for her Nihal was then, ummm?”
just a friendly colleague. “I’ve not given marriage a “No, no... nothing of that sort,” Mala smiled. And
thought. I... you see, I’m so involved in my work... I then Sanjee’s father said in an excited voice, “Listen
hope you understand if I say that I’m not ready for to what your maasi has planned for you.” Was that
marriage...” a day of marriage proposals? Sanjee grimaced
“Your work, your research, is no problem. I’m in inwardly. Yes, last week, maasi had said somewhat
the same field and I know you are gifted. I respect mysteriously, “A surprise in store for you.” What
your talent. So I never intend to stop you from doing else, but an eligible boy?
what you love to do and tie you to the home,” Nihal “You know, Mala wants to officially adopt you,”
said. “I’m not saying this just to make you agree. I Sanjee’s mother explained, “As such, you were
mean every word. You just have to say yes...” more her daughter than mine. You almost grew up in
She was pretty confused. “This all is so sudden.” her home. Now, she just wants to complete the
She had never thought of marriage and surely not to official formalities...”
Nihal. How to say ‘no’ without hurting him? “I don’t Adopt? That was totally unexpected. And why
think that would be a good idea. I would be doing now, after all these years? What her mother said
injustice to you...” was true. When Sanjee’s younger brother and then
“No, you wouldn’t. Why do you worry when I am the sister were born in quick succession after her,
myself assuring you?” But she still seemed to be lost Sanjee’s mother was unable to pay attention to her
in doubts, so he said, “Okay, you take your time...” firstborn. Then close friend and neighbour Mala
stepped in and happily took care of
little Sanjee. At that time Mala maasi
Statement of ownership and other particulars about and Jeetu maasa lived next door in a
WOMAN’S ERA small two-room house similar to
FORM IV, See Rule 8 theirs. But Maasaji was good at work
and business, and he soon made so
1. Place of publication: New Delhi. 2. Periodicity of publication:
much progress that the couple moved
Fortnightly. 3, 4, & 5 Printer’s, Publisher’s, and Editor’s Name: Paresh
to their own bungalow. Of course,
Nath. Nationality: Indian, Address: E-3, Jhandewala Estate, New Delhi-55.
that wasn’t too far, just in the lane
6. Names and addresses of individuals who own the newspaper and partners
behind theirs. So, by only going to
or shareholders holding more than one per cent of the total capital: Delhi
the next building and passing
Press Patra Prakashan Pte. Ltd., E-3, Jhandewala Estate, New Delhi-55.
through its back gate, Sanjee would
I, Paresh Nath, hereby declare that the particulars given above are true to
be in front of maasi’s bungalow.
the best of my knowledge and belief.
The financial differences had
Sd. Paresh Nath, Publisher.
made no difference to the emotional
STORY
it lovingly with all of Sanjee’s favourite things. thought. Even the transition from two rooms
Sanjee would stay there whenever she wished. For in a chawl to a spacious bungalow had not
her, there was no difference between the two houses made any difference to her. She plonked
or the people in those two houses. She always herself on the new upholstered sofa just as
thought she had two sets of parents and she loved she always had on the old, wrought-iron
them all equally. cot. Even this change had been quite some
So then why this sudden talk of adoption? Where years ago. But now... The same house,
was the need? She was Mala maasi’s daughter. same people and still she was a bit ill at
Maasi had looked after her, pampered her, scolded ease. Now she would be the daughter of
her while supervising her studies, sat by her bedside that house –!
the entire night whenever she was sick. When, after “Sit with me, Sanjee,” Mala maasi’s
years of waiting, she didn’t bear a child of her own, words broke into her thoughts. “You must be
Mala had showered even more love on Sanjee. All wondering why I ... we decided on
was fine, but then why this? adoption now after all these years? Well, yes, I
guess we should have done it long back. But, better
S
he had nothing against adoption, but... Leaving late than never... I don’t want to miss anything of
parents, changing everything including your life. We would like to get you married, I want
surname? And where was the necessity for it? to do the kanyadaan... all the pampering through
She was theirs anyway. Sanjee looked at her your pregnancy, and want to hold your hand during
parents and realised that they were quite happy, your delivery. Your small babies would call me nani
eager and excited with the thought. Naturally, and they would be my grandchildren... I don’t wish
because although Mala and Jeetu always helped to miss any of these things, so at least now.”
them as much as they could, but now it would be Sanjee didn’t know what to say, so she just
more than friendship, almost like a relationship or pressed her maasi’s hand.
the same family. That would help them as well as
B
their younger children. oth the families were happily looking forward
On the other hand, when Mala maasi had done to that occasion. Jeetu maasaji had started the
so much for her, she almost owed her life to maasi, paperwork necessary for adoption. As soon as
so how could she refuse her wish? Maybe at this the formal sanction came through, Mala maasi had
age, maasi had realised that she would never have planned to give a big party to make the
a child of her own and so now she wanted Sanjee announcement. She was busy preparing the guest
as only hers?
When everybody
looked so happy about it,
then how could Sanjee say
‘no’? Although she had
some apprehensions, she
successfully tried to hide
them and appeared as
happy as the rest of them.
There was no question of
her permission, everyone
had taken it for granted
that she would be glad to
hear the news. How and
why would she say no?
After two-three days
when Sanjee went to see
maasi, Mala made her
sit... she wanted to talk so
much. Sanjee felt a bit
awkward... that was quite
odd, actually. She had
S
uddenly she was in the limelight. Naturally, tried to coax her into doing everything from their
Sanjee was invited by various magazines, home. “Why do you ask your Jeetu maasa
newspapers and other media people for everything?” her father would say, “He may be
interviews. She was also invited to the TV channels good at his work, but for this help we can appoint
for participating in the youth or science-oriented some professional manager.”
programmes. This was just the part of her
A
achievement. On the business and money front, s these cold vibes continued to grow, Sanjee
many big companies were approaching her. They grew more and more sad. What was wrong
were interested in buying her invention and the with her families? All were hers and she
amounts they quoted were pretty impressive. belonged to them, then why these uncalled for fights?
This was all so sudden and so new to her... At first, she thought that it was just the initial reaction
everyone around her was very happy that her work due to the sudden shock. Soon, both the families
had got recognition. Both the families were so would forget this silly rivalry and become one as
thrilled that their own little Sanjee was a national before. But there were no such signs of changes.
figure now... so proud of her. “Now, the party would be on an even more
“Oh my little girl” Mala maasi hugged her grand scale,” Mala maasi got busy with her new
affectionately. “We never realised that you had plans, “This bungalow wouldn’t be sufficient... a
grown so much. Not only in years but also as a five-star hotel, may be? We’d play the video
great scientist.” She had bought huge boxes of recording of you receiving the award. You know,
sweets and asked her driver to distribute it in the Sanjee, your family needs the money, so you give
entire locality. “You’ll be going to Delhi to receive them all your award cash, and whatever you get for
that award? Oh my!” She gushed excitedly. “Yes, I your invention. Who needs the money here? You are
guess the adoption formalities would be complete by our precious possession.”
then. So you would be “Stuffing our mouths with money? What do they
accepting that award as my think? How can anyone forget that she is our
daughter. Oh, you see, just daughter, after all?” her family would go on ranting.
as this adoption work Both the families had gathered in Sanjee’s small,
started, you got this two-room house. They were no more at ease with
great honour. So how each other. They were getting restless with each
lucky this adoption is passing minute. “Why has she called us here?”
for you,” she Mala maasi murmured. “And then why hasn’t she
beamed proudly. turned up?”
Just then Sanjee entered the house with a
handsome young man by her side. Everyone was
about to start talking at once, but looking at the
stranger with her, they were all a bit subdued.
When no one said anything, Sanjee cleared her
throat and spoke, “I have called someone with me
and I want to introduce him to you all. He is Nihal
Kumar, my senior at the institute. He... well, we
would like to get your blessings as we’ve decided to
get married. Our simple marriage ceremony would
take place on the morning of the award function.
And I would receive the award as Mrs Nihal
Kumar.”
Shocked by this revelation, nobody could say a
word, and then suddenly all started talking at once,
“What is this?” “How could you.” “No, this can’t be
true!”
Sanjee tried to stop them and then spoke in a soft
voice, “I know it’s a shock. I’m sorry, but I had no
other go... oh... I know I’m too young and have no
right to talk to all my elders who have always given
me so much love. But that same love has given me laughed and said, “I guess it serves us right. We
the strength to speak today. Please, try to understand were all behaving... er... not in a right way and
me. I don’t know why all these differences have come beti, even being younger, you showed us elders how
up all of a sudden. Was it because of my adoption wrong we were. Now, my only request is, no need
or because of my award? But, whatever the reason, it to get married so hastily. You receive your award in
really pained me a lot to see my families, my people, whichever way you wish. And then we’ll... we all
drifting apart like this. It really made me very sad and together... will celebrate your marriage. Is that
so I had to take this step. I hope at least now there okay with you? Now please smile or else this young
won’t be any fights over anything. I hope I would get man would have a terrible first impression of his
my loving families back.” double in-laws...” Sanjee flopped down, totally
Nobody spoke as everybody was stunned. Then relieved of all tensions, as everyone laughed and
Mala maasi broke the uneasy silence as she greeted Nihal. We
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AN ARTIST OF
Solo Shows
AIFACS, New Delhi,
Triveni Kala Sangam, New Delhi, 2008
PASSION
ISKA, Cochin, Kerala, 2008
Lalit Kala Akademy,
New Delhi, 2007
Lalit Kala Akademy, Kochi, 2006
Lalit Kala Akademy, Trivendrum, 2005
Le Royale, Phnom Penh,
Cambodia, 2001
An artist from ‘God’s Own Country’
Awards reviews her dedication to the creations
State award for painting from Lalit
Kala Akademy 2003 for Three of nature. By Our Correspondent
Widows
Collections ini Roy’s restrained but decade, particularly to South East
B
Bini’s works are with private powerful strokes of Asia, have had much say in the
collectors and corporate houses in aesthetic articulations have evolution of her work and style. Bini
India and abroad. firm roots in nature and is simple and straightforward in the
social realism. The figures natural selection of very feminine
in her works summon hope, imageries.
despite the surrounding An onlooker compulsively falls into
gloom. Her personal vision conversation with the lines, colours
seems to be successfully and forms of Bini’s paintings. This is
emulated in her works. And the power of her art. There is an
it is particularly feminine and ever-deepening experience and a
positively spirited. poetic contemplation to be
Her voyages during the past experienced when viewing her works.
Excerpts from an interview: