08/11/97 7:32 PM A state of not knowing this is the state I am in sometimes my awareness is drawn away by other concerns perhaps

it is sometimes drawn away by ratiocination that is concerned with developing knowing that which is not known like why is Mary doing this why is Bill doing this that sort of thing mostly awareness is drawn away by visions of future discomforts like raid by the IRS and confiscation of the few possessions that remain court appearances fines and jail those sort of things homelessness and poverty but there is time to prepare a little more for the next celebration 08/11/97 7:39 there goes the upstairs toilet flushing again it gives me an opportunity to see that it is the visions of misfortune that are the source of dissatisfaction perhaps with the help of Hui-Neng that can be relieved by the attachment of a state of not knowing the state of not knowing is it seems a forerunner of the state of enlightened awareness since the realization of ignorance is very close to the awareness of awesomeness I do not know I do not know I o not know write one thousand times on the black board I do not know 08/11/97 7:48 PMthere was the sound of a sliding door and screen above and a clink that may have been an ash tray being plonked down. Now the sound of card being flipped against the floor which is the roof above my head the house has not yet been shown to any potential buyers since July 10th and thats more than a month.