This is episode 154 of the Absolute Mind podcasts and today I am covering how to save a failing relationship. This is a request from our Facebook audience and once again thank you for sending in your requests if you have any please do send a message with your request. http://www.absolutemind.co.uk/freeanxietycourse  Please do bear in mind that we have created this podcast to be of some insight and some sort of assistance but by no means a way to treat conditions on their own. If you do have any deep-rooted conditions or ailments that you'd like some assistance with on a one-to-one professional approach, then please feel free to contact either me or Michael on Facebook or directly through the website and we can arrange sessions that way or via Skype, whatever suits. I've decided to do this podcast as its come through from our Facebook audience and I hate the thought of relationships failing when they don't need to when all it needs is a little bit of work from both parties! Now don't get me wrong sometimes relationships can just naturally come to an end and both parties amicably agree to end their relationship. So if your relationship is going through a bad stage at the minute don't throw the towel in just yet hopefully today's podcast can help you to turn it around and start afresh with your loved one. Having a solid loving relationship is one of life's greatest joys. To have somebody in your life who you deeply love and build each other up can give the foundation of a meaningful life. But the truth of it is relationships don't just take care of themselves, they need work from both parties each and every day. relationships require commitment, self-awareness, willingness to change and grow and listen. You need to learn to shift from a thought pattern of "me" to "us" when you enter a relationship. Relationships can survive life's ups and downs but when it comes down to behaviours and patterns is when it can have a more damaging effect on our relationships. Through my years as a therapist, I have seen many behaviours and patterns that would instantly raise alarm bells in a relationship that cause lasting damage and create lasting resentment. Here are some of the behaviours I have come across and how you can begin to make some changes to save your relationship. Damaging Behaviours And Patterns Selfishness - Being selfish in a relationship can cause resentment and a feeling of unloved or uncared for by the other partner. Focusing on your own needs and not taking into consideration what they may want, need or desire can create this barrier between two people. Unbalanced - When a relationship is unbalanced meaning one person always makes the decision on how money is spent or one partners extended family is always priority this can damage the ties that hold you together as a unit/partnership. Marriage and committed relationships are all about the partnership of two people, uniting two people as a couple and when this sense of partnership is tarnished this weakens that bond. When you disregard your partner's needs or wishes it signals a lack of respect for that person. Not making the relationship a priority - When you enter a committed relationship, you have to start thinking differently and making the relationship a priority over certain things. Even when kids come along we must make our relationship a priority, after all a loving relationship and loving family life is important for your children to see, and not a family life full of resentment and arguments. Nights out with friends need a little more of a thought process and a discussion with our partners to show consideration for their feelings too. Anger - It is normal for a couple to have discussions or heated conversations but when they result in raised voices, shouting and arguing is when it can begin to break down a relationship. In a relationship you should be able to discuss your feelings calmly and effectively so that voices don't need to be raised, doors slammed and so on.